


An End To All Things

by DominusTenebrosus



Category: Clannad
Genre: Alternate Universe - Science Fiction, Angst, F/M, Possession Insert
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-11-21
Updated: 2014-12-15
Packaged: 2017-11-19 04:47:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 42
Words: 172,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/569270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DominusTenebrosus/pseuds/DominusTenebrosus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are those that say the ends justify the means. But sometimes there can be no justification. Worse, sometimes old habits die hard. An unusual self insert.  NOT a lemon.  Will never be a lemon.  Complete.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Meetings and Memories, Part 1

**Act One:  Intersections**

\----0----

 

It was May 3, 2037, and it was a beautiful day.  The air was crisp and clean; the sun shone down uninterrupted by clouds on the city of Hikarizaka.  A winding path, used mostly by students and faculty, led uphill to Hikarizaka Private High School.  For those whom walked that sakura lined path, the scent of the trees always brought peaceful thoughts and feelings to mind

 

Or at least, to most.

 

On it walked a young man in a student’s uniform.  He walked steadily as if being pulled by the chains of fate, and if anyone had been close enough to see, they would see that he wore an expression that could best be described as complex.   Every now and then he would stop and stare into the distance, watching a memory of events that had not yet occurred play out.

 

In his memory the sky is dark with smoke.  The city is burning, the school just one more building releasing smoke from fires like a death scream to pollute the air.  Flashes of light, either from lightning or the artificial flashes of light from what can only be tracer fire, were reflected by the acrid smoke that blotted out even the sun.  Oddly the path to the school is gone, along with the sakura trees, as if removed by a great hand.  It is not the work of what has destroyed the city.

 

What has done that is obvious whenever light flashes to reveal the coldly ominous shape of a nearby mushroom cloud.

 

Something like this should have left either the burnt corpses or carbonized shadows of the unlucky majority not prepared for such an event, but there are no such remains to be seen.  He didn't have to see inside the burning wreckages of buildings to know there were never any people in them when the event occurred.

 

As always, someone was prepared for it.

 

"Not long now," he said quietly in English.  "Less than a year.  Not long at all.  I wonder if I'll be ready." 

 

He shook his head warily and continued on.  He was going to be late for class again, not that he had particular reason to care, but he still wanted to show up.  He only had so long in which he could live something that resembled a normal life again, and that included going to high school.  ‘ _Best not waste it,’_ he reflected.  He turned the corner and spotted a vaguely familiar girl in the school's uniform.

 

She stood as if waiting for something that would never come, her two red hairclips keeping her shoulder length auburn hair in place as a light breeze blew.  He idly pulled on a strand of his short dark blue hair thoughtfully.  ‘ _Curious_ ,’ he thought as he pressed forward, glad for the excuse to take his mind off of gloomy augury even for a moment.

 

"Sweet bean bread!" exclaimed the girl as he moved to pass her, which caused him to pause and regard her with a raised eyebrow.  Even though it was plain to see she was talking to herself, it was still a most unusual statement.  He decided to wait and see what she said next.

 

"Do you like this school?"  Her tone took on a wistful edge.  "I, for one, happen to love it.  However...  Things always have to change.  Fun things...  Happy things...  But eventually they will change.  Even so, can you continue loving this place?"

 

He sighed.  So easy it would have been to just ignore her and carry on walking, to let her wait for something that would never come.  But there wasn't much time left.  Somehow it seemed like it would have been unfair, to see her waste what little time she didn't know she had.  He grunted, which caused her to jump slightly, as if she hadn't been aware she had an audience until that time.  She turned and looked at him with surprised golden eyes.

 

"You're right," he stated, his piercing blue eyes locking onto hers.  "Nothing stays the same forever.  Nothing but one thing.  And that is that one must always go forward."  He looked down the path that she seemed reluctant to take.  "You can't live in the past.  You'll miss out on new fun and happy things."  He began to walk down the path again.  "Come.  There is still time, if we set off now."  He could see her blink before nodding.

 

"Un!" she declared, and followed.

 

\----0----

 

It had been an unremarkable day from that point onward.  The girl that had come with him down the school path had gone her own way to class without word, and he had sat through the day alternating between dozing and looking bored.  If it weren't for the fact that he still turned in all of the assignments on time and correctly, he suspected that he would be pestered about his lethargic approach to class.

 

Or perhaps not, as his dubious friend, Sunohara Youhei, seemed to get away with it just fine most of the time as well, in spite of questionable grades and generally unreliable classroom habits.  It was this uncertain character that he was now on his way to visit, class now being over and him without much reason to return home.

 

It seemed that he was not the only person after Sunohara, however.  Sunohara lived in the sports dorm in spite of not being in any sports since shortly after his first year began, having been kicked out for fighting.  The same could not be said for the other tenants, mainly the overly built members of the Rugby team whom were arrayed as if they intended to use the hallway to drill in.  By the looks of things, Sunohara was to be used as the ball.

 

"Have you learned your lesson now, Sunohara?!" exclaimed one of the larger team members.

 

"What do you think you’re doing playing your CD so loud?" another barked from within the crowd.

 

"But if I don’t listen to it I can’t focus," lamented the source of their irritation with a sheepish smile from in the arm lock the largest of the players had him in, a young man of slightly below average height and build with a baby face and a shock of yellow dyed hair.  His lamentation only seemed to incite the rugby playing crowd, one of them giving out a battle cry of some sort as the largest player lifted him up and prepared to toss him like a ball.

 

"This again?" he asked to the even stares of the team.

 

"Okazaki!  Stop watching and help me!" exclaimed the object of their derision in a desperate plea for help.

 

"And what happened to the headphones I lent you?" Okazaki asked.  ‘ _Broken, no doubt_ ,’ he reflected.

 

"I accidentally sat on them," Sunohara admitted as he attempted to poke his index fingers together sheepishly, but couldn’t thanks to the lock the captain had him in.  A tan and orange striped cat, the one that seemed to frequent the place, sidled up to Okazaki, rubbing itself on his leg in a fond fashion.

 

"Consider it punishment for breaking my things then," Okazaki said flatly as he reached down to pick up the tomcat and save it from potential injury.

 

"You heartless bastard!" Sunohara screeched as he was rolled down the line, kicked toward the back of their line, picked up by another player and kicked to the front of the line.

 

"Huh, good air time," said Okazaki, as Sunohara flew.  The cat mewed in agreement.  Sunohara was caught by another player and passed back as if he were naught but a handball, and tackled to the floor by the same player that kicked him back to the front of the line.

 

Whatever else they planned to do with him was interrupted by the entrance of an enraged woman.  "Shut up!" screamed Sagara Misae, dorm mother.  Her blue hair was in a loose bun and her gold eyes flashed with irritation as she charged toward the rowdy rugby players, spinning the mop as if it were a staff with one hand.  Sunohara lay forgotten as they cowered and fled before her wrath.  "Break it up already!"

 

"Squad broken," Okazaki quipped as he watched the fleeing troupe while petting the cat behind the ears absent-mindedly.

 

"Owwww," bemoaned Sunohara from his position on the floor.

 

"For crying out loud," said Misae as she slammed the mop head on the floor in aggravation.  "I'm the one that has to deal with the complaints from the neighbors."

 

"It could be worse," Okazaki said.  "They could ignore you outright."

 

"Misae san," sobbed Sunohara as he climbed up her leg from his position on the floor.  "Come save me earlier, please..." he moaned.

 

"You're the one at fault, aren't you?" Misae replied, much of her anger gone as she gently kicked him off.  "Why don't you learn your lesson?"

 

"Yes ma'am," groaned out Sunohara.  Okazaki simply let out a deep sigh at the antics of his friend.

 

\----0----

 

"Damn that rugby club," Sunohara stated warily from his position behind the table after Okazaki helped him back to his room.

 

"Why don't you just keep the music down?" Okazaki had to ask.  It was hardly the first time this had happened, and at this rate, hardly the last either.  "Or, you know, stop breaking my headphones."

 

"One of these days I'm going to get them back," Sunohara said, ignoring Okazaki's question.  "When I do, you'll have my back, won't you?"

 

"I don't know, are you going to break my headphones again?" Okazaki said with a smirk.

 

"Some friend you are," Sunohara snorted.

 

"At least I'm not making things worse.  In fact I'm trying to help you.  If you'd quit breaking my headphones, you'd be completely safe."

 

"Headphones, headphones, headphones," snorted Sunohara, annoyed.  "Don't you care about your poor friend Sunohara?  It's not like you care about the headphones anyway, isn't that why you lent them to me?"

 

"Speaking of," Okazaki said, ignoring Sunohara's question as he raised his hand.  In it was the headphones, or at least what may have once been a pair of headphones, but now more resembled a pile of plastic chips and bent metal dross.  "How exactly did you manage to shatter these this badly?  I don't buy sitting on them."

 

"They were under a book," Sunohara insisted.  Okazaki examined the pile of ex-headphone doubtfully.  The plastic was fully shattered, but the remains of the metal parts of the speakers had curved indentations on them, as if hit with a hammer.

 

"A hammer shaped book?" Okazaki asked with amusement, holding up one of the metal chunks with a more pronounced bend on it.  Sunohara scratched the back of his head and laughed a little.

 

"Wow, you're good."

 

"No, you're just obvious," Okazaki smirked.  "So why are you introducing my stuff to a hammer?"

 

"I wanted to see if you could fix it.  Still don't know how you did it last time."

 

"Trade secret," Okazaki said, and stuffed the remains in his pocket.  "I'll see what I can do.  But seriously, stop breaking them okay?  It's a pain in the ass."

 

"Yeah, yeah.  You know, I'd be more careful if you cared."

 

"Well," Okazaki said, using Sunohara's bed as a backrest as he picked up one of the manga lying around the room.  "I care.  Sorta.  Just...  Don't break them."

 

"Sure," Sunohara said noncommittally as he turned his attention to another one of the manga on the floor.  Okazaki regarded him for a few moments before sighing and thumbing through the manga.  As it turned out, it was one he'd already read.  He sighed again and resigned himself to reading it once more.

 

\----0----

 

And so the day passed.  Okazaki eventually returned home to sleep, and came to class in much the same way as he always did, lamenting a memory that had not happened yet.  He was definitely late this time, for what little it mattered.  First period was done, and he was showing up between first and second period in an effort to not disrupt things too much.  As he went to open the door, he heard voices talking about him.

 

"Okazaki and Sunohara aren't here yet?" asked the voice of a young man.  Okazaki paused in mild interest and listened.

 

"I don’t get it.  They’re seniors, shouldn’t they be worried about exams and futures?" asked another male student.

 

"Just forget it.  We don’t have time to worry about them," said the first of the talking pair.  Okazaki shook his head with a smirk and entered.  ‘ _How little they know_ ,’ he thought with amusement as he noted a student warning one of the students talking of his entrance, whom merely let off a small chuckle.  Okazaki let his face return to a neutral expression, indifference taking hold.

 

"U-um, Okazaki kun," began a shy female voice.  Okazaki looked up and noted the presence of the class representative.  A  head shorter than he was, with blue eyes, violet hair cropped to the shoulders, and a ribbon in her hair to the left side of her face; Fujibayashi Ryou, twin sister to Fujibayashi Kyou, if only in basic appearance.

 

Where the elder twin was headstrong and determined, the younger twin that stood before him, paper in hand and a slight blush was submissive and demure.  The term 'Shrinking Violet' sprung to mind.

 

"Fujibayashi san," he said, noting her presence.

 

"You came in late again today," she smiled.

 

"And?"

 

"Um," she raised her hand to her face uncertainly, "I think you should show up to class properly every day."

 

Okazaki had to chuckle at that.  "You're probably right.  But it's unlikely to actually happen."

 

"Oh."  A tear formed in the corner of her eye.

 

"Thanks for the concern though," Okazaki said with a sigh, hoping to avoid making her cry.

 

"Hey Okazaki, don't make the class representative cry," one of the male students from earlier said.

 

"Her sis is gonna come running in here," noted another male student warily.

 

"I'm fine," she said as she turned around.  "I'm not crying."

 

Okazaki sighed.  "I tell you what," he said earnestly.  "I'll think about it.  Maybe I'll be here on time tomorrow."

 

"Th-Then um, I'll read your fortune for tomorrow," she said with what could be viewed as either excitement or nervousness.

 

"Hm?  Fortune telling?" he asked, interest piqued.

 

"Y-yes," she said as she pulled out a stack of playing cards.  He blinked as she began to shuffle them.

 

"Playing cards?" he asked with mild confusion, just as she fumbled her shuffling and dropped the lot of them.  He sighed and went to start helping her pick up the fallen cards.

 

"Okazaki kun...  You'll be late tomorrow," she said as she stared at the cards.

 

"...That's your prediction?" he asked as he paused in his efforts to pick up the cards.

 

"Yes," she said shyly with a slightly sheepish smile.  "I think that's how this sort of fortune telling works."

 

"Well," he said, for a moment lost for words.

 

"On the way to school you will have a romantic meeting with a kind girl," she said, looking first at the upturned queen of spades, then the ten of diamonds, "Forget about the passing of time," she continued, looking at the ace of hearts, "and therefore be late."

 

"Well.  It's...  Detailed."

 

"A-A maiden's inspiration," she replied with a blush.

 

"Hey!" A rude voice speared the room.  "Okazaki Tomoya!"

 

He narrowed his eyes, time slowing down for an instant as he noted an incoming projectile, a Japanese to English dictionary he noted, doubtless thrown by the source of the voice.

 

His hand snapped up to catch the thrown book as his mind worked.  ‘ _Now who would throw this?’_   The book made contact with his hand and stopped dead in its tracks.  He brought his hand down in time to see a second book, this time a calculus text.

 

_‘Gotta be Kyou_ ,’ he said to himself mentally as his other hand reached to catch the second book.  As he brought it out of his viewing radius, the third thrown book, a history textbook this time, made itself known.

 

He dodged under it in the fraction of a second he had, and felt it graze his cheek as it passed.  The memories of incidents with far more dangerous projectiles than mere books bunched up on him for a moment, the sensation of burnt, flayed skin, of shockwaves shattering bone and crumpling steel played through his mind as it passed.  He suppressed a shudder as the book flew out of the open window behind him and curved into a tree in the plaza between buildings.

 

He turned his stare to the source of the rogue books and gazed levelly at the elder twin.  The same face as her sister, almost, but with violet eyes that seem to be perpetually stuck in a slightly irritated expression, hip-length hair, and a ribbon tied to her hair on the right side of her face.

 

"Kyou," he said evenly.

 

"Older sister," Fujibayashi said, slightly awestruck.

 

"You've got some nerve to pick on my sister," Kyou said angrily as she approached, fists balled and posture aggressive.

 

Okazaki set the books down on his desk without letting his eyes off of the approaching girl.

 

She grabbed his tie to minimal effect.  "You loser," she practically spat in his face.

 

He kept his expression entirely neutral, which seemed to just increase Kyou's irritation.

 

"H-He's not picking on me," Fujibayashi stammered as she waved her hands frantically, as if to prevent a fight.

 

Kyou regarded her, then Okazaki, before shrugging.  "Hmm, then fine," she said as she released his tie.  "Though that expression pisses me off for some reason.  Hmm?"  Kyou looked down, noting at last the cards on the floor.  "Oh, you had Ryou read your fortune?"

 

"That's right," he said evenly, not yet letting his guard down.  "Apparently I'm going to have some meeting with a kind girl, forget about the passing of time, and be late."

 

"Hehmm," Kyou said as she regarded him with a slight smirk as she rubbed her chin in mock thoughtfulness.  "Well, good luck," she said exuberantly and smacked his shoulder before turning to leave, practically skipping out the door and laughing.

 

Okazaki raised an eyebrow.  "...Right," he said as she left.

 

\----0----

 

The rest of the class was uneventful, with Okazaki dutifully pretending to ignore it as usual after he helped Fujibayashi with her cards.  Lunch time came soon enough, and he got up to go alone as Sunohara wasn't around.  As he made his way to the cafeteria, he heard three students discussing a rumor.

 

"Ghost?"  Said one of the three students.

 

Okazaki resisted snorting but listened anyway as he passed.

 

"I heard she appears," said a gray haired student conspiratorially.  "The ghost of the girl that got in a car accident."

 

"Just a rumor," said a brown haired student dismissively.

 

_‘Sounds about right_ ,’ Okazaki mentally commented.

 

"I’m not kidding! And I heard she’d cute too," noted the first.

 

Okazaki shook his head, as if to dismiss what he had heard as the epitome of inanity.  In truth, he wasn't entirely dismissive of ghosts; he had seen at least a few things that made him have to consider the possibility of ghosts, but he simply didn't buy high school rumors about them.  Far too many ways a message could get distorted.

 

_‘Probably someone saw a girl that they thought looked like whomever had got in the car accident, and things had went on from there,’_ he reckoned as he turned his head to look out the window.

 

He noted a lone student eating bread in silence outside, sitting on the edge of a short retaining wall in the shade of a bush.  The very same girl whom he had talked to on the hill yesterday.  ‘ _Huh.  You think she didn't have any friends.’_   He sighed to himself.  Again, it would be so easy to just let the situation go.  ‘ _But we promised not to do that anymore, didn't we?’_   He made his way outside.

 

"You alone?" he asked, putting his foot up on the retaining wall and using his knee as a rest for his arms.  He was met by silence.  "Hmm.  Are you awake?"

 

"I'm sorry," she said.  "I'm eating right now."

 

Okazaki let out a small chuckle and sat down on the edge of the shade to wait.

 

She finished in reasonably short order and folded her empty wrappers meticulously, and started drinking juice.

 

Okazaki continued to wait patiently as he reminded himself that he was already out there after all.

 

She finally finished and turned to Okazaki.  "Um, how can I help you?" she asked timidly.

 

"You seemed lonely," he said with a shrug.

 

She mulled over this for a few seconds.  "Do you like this school?" she asked at last, quietly.

 

"Hm.  Well, it's a school.  Each one is about the same as another really."

 

"I really, really love it," she said, reminding him of what she said on the hill.  "I used to have friends and teachers that I got along with, but now..."

 

"I take it that something happened?"

 

"Last year I was away from school for a long time," she said.  He took note of the patch on her chest, denoting her to be a senior.  "So I'm..."

 

"Repeating," he said, earning a nod from the girl.  "I'm guessing your friends have all graduated?"

 

"Yes," she said with a nod.  "And now I don't know anyone here.  I feel like Urashima Tarou."  She wilted for a second before gasping.  "Ah!  I'm sorry.  What am I saying to a person I just met..."

 

"Don't worry about it," he said with a small smirk.  "I'm here to listen, after all.  Though I will say, at least you aren't actually Urashima Tarou.  It's only been a year, not three hundred."

 

"Ah," she said.  "You're right."  They sat in silence for a few seconds.

 

"Hm, well," he said as he thought back to a time that now seemed like ancient history to him.  "If you wanted to make new friends, you could join a club I suppose."

 

"I did want to join the theater club," she admitted with a measure of dejection.  Indeed, she seemed to sink into herself on saying so.  "But I have a weak body, I don't think I could properly participate in the activities."

 

"Well, it's not like acting is a high impact activity," he observed wryly.  "Stressful, but with the right part you won't have to go running around like a maniac."  He gave her the thumbs up with a grin.

 

She couldn't help but smile a little in response.  "Still..." she said sinking back down again.

 

"Well, let's get you sorted, then.  We'll go drop in on them and see about getting you involved," he said, leaving no room for argument.  ‘ _And if this works, maybe I'll have had a positive impact on someone's life for once.’_

 

"I...  Okay," she relented.

 

They sat in silence until a faint buzzing noise reached Okazaki's ears.  He stood and looked in the direction of the school's soccer field.

 

Seconds passed as she looked up at Okazaki in mild confusion.  "What is that sound?" she asked as she finally noticed it herself.

 

Okazaki started to walk toward the source, followed closely by the girl whom he was talking to.

 

They arrived to the scene of two motorcycles doing large donuts on the soccer field.  Okazaki could see Sunohara, whom was sitting on one of the blue chairs that overlooked the field as he drank juice.

 

"Wow, so cool, they're wheeling around!" exclaimed Sunohara.

 

Okazaki's expression seemed to express the exact opposite opinion, as if he thought they were trouble seeking idiots.  His expression changed then, a smirk growing as if he were considering giving them the trouble they sought.  He stroked his chin thoughtfully for a few seconds, as if mulling it over.

 

He started to walk forward, only to pause as out of the corner of his eye, he saw someone he had seen before.  Silver hair down to her waist, black hairband, blue eyes.  Oh yes.  He'd definitely seen her before.


	2. Meetings and Memories, Part 2

_He believed in reincarnation.  He had to.  He was reincarnated himself._

_His first life had seemed like one long fight.  As a child and teenager, fighting against his peers that did not understand or tolerate him.  As an adult, fighting against a society where ultimately he did not, could not fit, and fighting his body, which had already begun its slow slide into decay._

_And when finally he was given the power to change things in his middle age, he chose to fight, fighting against the world at large.  Old habits die hard, after all._

_It had not been enough; in the end he was ultimately killed by one much like himself.  Very much like himself, so much in fact that it was almost funny.  And he had deserved it too, he knew.  For he had misused the power he had been given, given through the miracles of steel and wire, through radio and laser, through servo and hydraulic.  Though those that developed it were perhaps partly to blame, in the end it stood that he could have shared it with the world, taken humanity in hand and shown them paradise._

_Instead, he had shown them war.  A war to end all wars.  He had lived by the sword, and ultimately died by it.  He couldn't complain.  The depths that he had sunk to in order to do what he had done, and the act itself, not much better than outright murder of those that would merely see that their homeland was protected...  No, he could not complain._

_And yet, the universe had given him a second chance.  Reborn into a world that had not yet felt his heavy hand.  Back with all the knowledge that he had accumulated in his past life.  Enough that he could rebuild himself, similar to how he had been rebuilt in his first life.  He did so.  He had to.  Once you had perceived the world like that, it was impossible to go back and feel complete.  Again, old habits die hard._

_Yes, old habits die hard.  They were why he was standing on the corner of a small building, watching idly for the moment as a small group of thugs harassed passing people going about their business from the alley they had decided to group into.  Even after the oddly humbling experience of being nigh unstoppable, he found he could not leave his ways behind him.  He still liked to fight too much._

_And so he prepared to give them a beating in the name of vigilantism, knowing it wouldn't truly bring him satisfaction.  He would not kill them, no, though he could do so all too easily.  He had caused, would cause, enough suffering for one lifetime.  He would merely see them off.  He just needed to see that they really deserved the beat down, see enough to give him at least the semblance of justification.  And he about had it._

_It was then, as he watched, that a girl with silver hair and a black hairband walked up to the edge of the alley.  He could see something about her, maybe it was the look on her face, maybe it was the way she moved, but it gave him pause.  This girl...  He could see that she had a capacity for violence and raw fury that perhaps matched his own.  He could see she had the same idea he had, and he decided to see how it played out.  She was outnumbered three to one, but if the odds were too great he could always intervene._

_"Hey girlie," one of the thugs said, gesturing.  "How about having some fun with us, huh?"_

_"Yeah, we'll show you a good time, c'mon," another said, winking.  The last simply stuck out his tongue suggestively._

 

 _"How about it, do-ugh!"  The girl was on the first of the thugs in the blink of an eye, sending him sprawling.  Okazaki tilted his head in surprise._ ‘She's quick,’ _he thought as he watched her kick the winking man in the face, the force of the blow taking him off his feet and driving him into a wall._

_"Why you-" the last thug had the chance to utter before he joined his friends in kick-induced unconsciousness.  He hoped she hadn't kicked them into a coma, but he supposed there was little to do about it now if she did, and considering, maybe it would be a civic service._

 

 _He had to smirk in either event._ ‘She's good,’ _he had to admit to himself._ ‘I wouldn't mind sparring with her one of these days.’ _It was then she turned and looked up at him, blue eyes filled with malice._ ‘Observant too.  Guess she'd have to be.’ _He merely gave her a thumbs up and turned his back, walking away from the situation.  There'd be other groups of thugs to clobber._

 

\----0----

 

He never did see her again after that.  Until now, that is.  He had heard rumors though.  Even if he didn't buy all of them, he'd seen enough to believe that many of them were true.  ‘ _A really strong, beautiful girl who went around beating up those who harassed others.  Heh.  It looks like she hasn't changed much either,’_ Okazaki reflected as she went out to meet the thugs on bikes.  He stroked his chin thoughtfully as she approached the idiots on bikes.

 

"Is she gonna lecture them?" one of the onlookers asked incredulously.  ‘ _Perhaps on how to cope with kick induced injuries,’_ Okazaki thought snidely.  The thugs came to a stop, facing her down.

 

"Why did this happen?" asked the girl behind Okazaki, as if to herself.

 

"Wherever you go, there will be people that want what you have, and would rather see it destroyed then to see someone else have it," he said solemnly.  "It's said that this is the best school in the city, and they're not in it."

 

"That's horrible," she said to herself.

 

"That's life," he replied.

 

"And you're gonna sit there and do nothing, Okazaki?"  Sunohara asked, looking at Okazaki askance.  "I thought you liked fights."

 

"I do," he said.  "I'll jump in if she needs it."

 

"She won't," one of the girls present on the field said with conviction.  "Tomoyo's real strong!"

 

"She transferred in as a junior this spring!" said another.

 

"Sakagami Tomoyo san!" said the first, enthusiastically.

 

"Hm," Okazaki said as he leaned away from the trio slightly and regarded them with a raised eyebrow, somewhat creeped out by the rabidity of the small cult of personality.

 

"Tch," Sunohara said.  "No way a girl's stronger than a guy."  Okazaki turned to regard him evenly with a slight, unimpressed frown before he turned his attention again to the spectacle before them.

 

"I don't want to cause an unnecessary disturbance," said Tomoyo, from the field.  "Get lost before you get hurt."

 

 _‘Huh.  The girl I saw before, I don't think she'd have given them the warning,’_ Okazaki thought and stroked his chin.

 

"If you do I'll let all of you go," she said calmly and placed her hand on her chest, as if making a promise.  The idiots on bikes didn't appear to be impressed.  "You don't want to deliberately ask for pain, do you?"

 

The idiot that appeared to be leading the circus, one which he had to note had a hilarious hairdo, appeared to be in the process of losing it.

 

"Nnn, don't screw with us!" he finally yelled, all pretense of common sense and restraint completely gone, as he revved his bike and headed straight for Tomoyo.  Sunohara gasped as he watched, worry finally getting the better of him, while the girl from earlier held her hand to her mouth as if expecting to see something horrible.  Okazaki merely kept a scrutinizing eye on the situation, as if acting as a referee.

 

Tomoyo leapt far into the air.  Okazaki was surprised, not at the jump, but at how high she had jumped.  She kicked the hilarious hairstyle idiot straight off his bike, before machine kicking the other idiots and their bike.  Pieces of plastic, torn off from the force of her blows, were flung back with along with the bikes and their foolish riders.  Tomoyo landed gracefully, and turned to view her audience.

 

It was then that she took note of Okazaki.  Her gaze seemed to bore into him.  He merely smirked, and gave her a thumbs up.  Her eyes narrowed.

 

"What is she...?" Sunohara asked with a slight shiver to his voice.  The Tomoyo fan club merely cheered at their heroine's victory.

 

"Show's over, let's go," Okazaki said, and turned around to head back to the school, followed by the girl from earlier.  Tomoyo's gaze followed him until he disappeared around a bend.

 

\----0----

 

"So she's a transfer student," said the auburn haired girl as they went back to sitting where they were.

 

"So it would seem," Okazaki replied.  They sat for a minute in comfortable silence.  The bell rang, signifying the end of lunch period.  Both of them stood up.

 

"Oh, I didn't get your name," he said.  "I'm Okazaki Tomoya, from class D.  Nice to meet you."

 

"I'm Furukawa Nagisa from class B," she said with a bow.  "Nice to meet you too."

 

"Well, I'll see you around then, Furukawa," he said as he left for his class.

 

"Yes," Furukawa said.  He waved once as he left.

 

\----0----

 

"Hey, Okazaki!" Sunohara hissed from his seat as they sat in class.

 

Okazaki grunted in response, his head laying on the desk as if he were asleep.

 

"Tag along later," Sunohara said with a grin, knowing Okazaki heard him.

 

Okazaki shrugged as if to say, "I have nothing better to do, why not?"

 

\----0----

 

Classes ended for the day, and Okazaki followed Sunohara as he led the way toward their destination, one of the second year student classrooms.  They arrived to find Tomoyo as she was saying goodbye to her classmates.  She regarded Okazaki for a moment with a raised, suspicious eyebrow.

 

"Hey!" Sunohara exclaimed.  Tomoyo blinked and looked at him.  "I'm on to you, girl!"

 

"...What are you talking about?" she asked as she regarded him with a raised eyebrow.

 

"I think the thing earlier with the bikers was a setup," Sunohara said confidently with a smirk.

 

"A setup?" she asked with surprise.

 

"Yeah, there's no way a girl like you could beat guys," Sunohara said, which caused Okazaki to wonder about Sunohara’s sanity as he looked over at him with a warily raised eyebrow.

 

"You paid them or something, asking them to lose, right?  To get popular."  Sunohara pointed his index finger at Tomoyo, with a knowing grin.  "If it's not money, would it be the other something?"  He gave a wider grin with a shrug.  "Girls are lucky, since stupid guys will listen to that."

 

Okazaki let his head fall onto his open palm.  Tomoyo merely glared at Sunohara.

 

"Who are they?" one of the girls in the hallway behind Tomoyo asked.

 

"They’re the gang from the senior class," replied another.  "I think they’re Sunohara and Okazaki!"

 

"Guilty by association," Okazaki said plaintively as he shook his head.  "How pitiful."

 

"Whose side are you on?"  Sunohara turned to Okazaki with a whine.

 

"The side standing over here," Okazaki replied as he backed away with his hands held up disarmingly.

 

Tomoyo regarded Okazaki levelly for a moment before she turned to Sunohara.  "Rejoice," she announced.  "I was thinking I wouldn't hurt those in the same school, but I will make an exception and specially fight you."

 

Okazaki cracked an amused smile at the thought.

 

"You're so cute, acting tough.  I bet your knees are shaking," Sunohara said as he imitated someone in some sort of seizure.

 

"Can I ask that you don't put him in a coma?"  Okazaki interjected as he raised his index finger.  "Technically, he is my friend."

 

"Technically?" Sunohara yelled at Okazaki.

 

"You have poor taste in friends," Tomoyo noted dryly.

 

"Sometimes," conceded Okazaki, equally dryly.

 

"Hey!"  Sunohara yelped.

 

"I would like to make this self-defense," Tomoyo turned back to the affronted Sunohara.  "So you come at me."

 

Sunohara spat to the side, annoyed.  "Don't be so full of yourself," he said as he thumbed his nose at her before he charged, shouting "Die!"

 

Tomoyo jumped back slightly into a loose stance as Sunohara approached.  His fist was in the air in an obvious high punch.

 

One kick from Tomoyo sent Sunohara flying past Okazaki.  Sunohara spun 180 degrees in air to land on his face.

 

Okazaki shook his head.  "Well that was predictable," he said.

 

"Please don't come at me again," Tomoyo said coldly to Sunohara.  She glanced briefly at Okazaki and turned to leave.

 

"Damn it," Sunohara said, tears in his eyes.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki made his way to where he remembered the Theater Club was, after he left Sunohara to recover from being kicked around.  The room was on the third floor of the liberal arts building.  He went up the stairs quickly, and as he made it to the main hallway he saw Furukawa, whom stood in front of the room for the old Theater club.  She seemed to him to be working up the nerve to open the door.

 

"Hamburger," she declared quietly to herself.

 

 _‘Strange girl,’_ Okazaki decided with a blink.

 

"Excuse me," she said as she opened the door...  And stopped.  She blinked.  Then blinked again, mouth open in surprise.

 

"Hmm," Okazaki said as he walked up to see what had her so surprised.  He peered in from behind her at a dark room, a small layer of dust on the closed boxes giving indication that the room hadn't been in use for some time.  "It's empty?"

 

"Okazaki san," Furukawa said.  "I didn't know that you were there."

 

"I am," Okazaki said, walking into the room with a sigh, an expression of disappointment almost matching Furukawa's.  ‘ _So much for that idea_ ,’ he lamented to himself as he traced a finger through the dust on one of the boxes.  "Last I had checked, the theater club was still in operation.  I guess...  That changed."  ‘ _Probably after graduation took all their members,’_ he tactfully omitted.  It was his own fault for not thinking to check beforehand really, he reflected.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki and Furukawa left the empty room and went downstairs silently.  The first floor had a notice board near the door, and he stopped to look at it.  She stopped beside him.

 

Okazaki pointed toward one of the notices on the board.  "It closed down in March," he said.

 

"I heard it never had a lot of members to start with," Furukawa said sadly.

 

"But they're only closed.  Get enough members, and you could probably re-open it yourself."

 

"Do you think so?" she murmured.

 

"It said so in the rulebook, if I recall correctly.  It's too late to recruit, at least officially, but we could ask around unofficially."

 

"Um, Okazaki san..." she started as she turned toward Okazaki.  "Why are you being so kind to me, even though we just met?"

 

"Because I started this," he said with a shrug.  "I'll admit, I thought this would be a bit less effort when I started, but, well, can't let things go unfinished."  She looked down at that.  "Besides.  You're a kind person in some bad luck.  It wouldn't be fair of me to not help."  He smiled sadly and looked down himself.  "Certainly, I have plenty to atone for.  Perhaps, in this small way, I can do at least a small bit of good."

 

 _‘But there are lines that should never be crossed, and I crossed too many of them to ever feel good about myself again, let alone ever completely atone for my sins,’_ he reflected with a sigh as he considered his past.  ‘ _And yet, what is there to do, but try?’_

 

"I see," she said as she sat down and hugged her knees.  He leaned against the wall.  The silence stretched on for nearly a minute before she turned to him.

 

"You're a good person," she said.  "I don't know what you're atoning for...  But you're a good person."  He smiled a little at that.

 

"I thank you for the vote of confidence," he said with a small, sad smile and downturned eyes.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki and Furukawa left the school shortly afterward.  He ended up walking her most of the way home.  It was on the way back to his house, so he figured, ‘ _Well, why not?’_  She stopped at an intersection not too far away from where he lived.

 

"We part here," she said.

 

"Alright," Okazaki said.  "Fare thee well," he said in English, and raised his right arm to his side and his left to his chest for a dramatic bow.  She smiled at this.

 

"Um, Okazaki san," she began.  "My house is the bakery ahead in front of the park. Please come when you feel like it."

 

"You live in a bakery?"

 

"Yes."

 

"I bet that's nice.  Always amid the smell of fresh bread.  You're lucky."

 

"Do you think so?"

 

"I do.  Maybe I'll take you up on that offer."

 

"Please do," she said.  He turned around to walk to his house with a wave.

 

\----0----

 

As it ended up, he never went back home.  Instead he ended up meandering, enjoying the sights that he knew would only last for so long.  It was in the early hours of the evening when he finally found himself at Furukawa Bread.  There didn't appear to be anyone in the place at first glance, but the lights were on so he opened the door and announced his presence.

 

"Hello," Okazaki said.  "Anyone in?"  There was no response.  He thought about peeking in the back, but instead looked around at the goods.  At that hour they were mostly sold out, except for one rack of breads.  He leaned in to have a closer look when he noticed a woman appear from the back of the store out of the corner of his eye.

 

"That's this week's new release," she said, the bow holding back her auburn hair giving the golden eyed woman a look of youth that made the already difficult task of trying to ascertain her age almost impossible.  She held her hands together hopefully.  "Please try one if you like."  She tilted her head to the side with a wide, innocent smile.  "You don't have to worry about paying, since it's a leftover.  The concept is 'soothing.'"

 

"Soothing?" he said as he reached down to take one, the woman nodding in anticipation.  "Well, don't mind if I do, thank you."  He picked up a piece of bread, and sniffed.  ‘ _Huh.  Odd smell,’_ he reflected.  ‘ _Is that rice cracker in with the bread?’_ He took a bite, of the bread, not quite expecting the crunch that came in spite of the warning his nose had given him.  He chewed thoughtfully.

 

"There's a rice cracker inside," the woman noted, rather redundantly at this point.  "It's rice cracker bread."

 

"So it is," he said, and chewed in silence.  She stepped down from the raised platform of the back into her shoes before she tilted her head to the side in slight worry.

 

"Is there a problem?" she asked with a hint of uncertainty.

 

"Hmm.  It's an interesting concept.  But I don't think it's the right combination."

 

"Eh?" she gasped.  If one looked closely enough, one could see the lightning bolt of shocked despair manifest behind her.  "My bread isn't the right combination?"

 

"Don't get me wrong," he said as he tried to head hurt feelings off at the pass.  "This could be good with, say, chocolate covered graham crackers and chocolate bread.  It could be a dessert bread, but..."  He looked over to note that she was on the verge of tears.

 

"So my...  Bread isn't..."  She teared up in earnest.  "Isn't the right combination!" she wailed, sobbing into the night.

 

"Er."  He found himself silenced by her unexpected actions.  That said, if he didn't know better, he'd think that was an act of some sort.  "Well.  It...  Takes all kinds, I guess."  He scratched the back of his head.  It was then that he noticed a man coming from where the woman had come from, and turned to face him.

 

"Ah," the man said in slight surprise.  He stood a head taller than Okazaki, with shockingly red hair, golden eyes, and an aluminum baseball bat leaning on his shoulder.  The cigarette in his mouth quivered as he glared down at Okazaki, whom raised an eyebrow in return.  "You said what you're not supposed to say," he said as he leveled the bat at Okazaki, whom in turn narrowed his eyes at the man.

 

"My apolo-"

 

"You should have kept eating and said it's good," the man continued over Okazaki's attempt at an apology.  "That's what duty is about.  That's what morality is about," he went on as he poked Okazaki with the bat.  Okazaki frowned, and narrowed his eyes further.  The man pulled the bat back.  "The truth is always harsh," he said as he took a drag from his cigarette.

 

"And to tell her so straightforwardly would be..."  He glared down at Okazaki.  "Too brutal for her!"

 

He started to tap Okazaki on the chest, as if expecting him to run backward.  Okazaki however, was beginning to lose patience with the bat.  He gripped it around the middle of the wide portion, and held it steady.

 

The man attempted to push the bat forward at first, then attempted to pull the bat away.  "What...?"

 

"I tried to apologize," Okazaki said.  "I honestly didn't mean to be insulting to anyone.  But the bat is too much," he said as he released the bat.  The man looked down at his bat with a frown.  "I will take my leave, then."  He turned around to go.

 

"Wait," the man said, putting a hand on his shoulder.  Okazaki turned to regard the still glaring man.  After a few seconds, the man's face broke.  "You're pretty strong," he said with a grin.  "Do you play baseball?"  Okazaki raised an eyebrow before sighing.

 

"No-"

 

"No?!?" the man exclaimed.  "You call yourself Japanese and you don't-"  He paused, as if noticing something for the first time.  "Wait, that uniform...  Are you Nagisa's friend?"

 

"I...  Wait...  What?"  Okazaki sputtered, not quite used to how quickly the man in front of him was capable of changing gears.  If the gears were less metaphorical, he'd have to wonder what exactly they were made of to keep in one piece from the abuse the man was subjecting them to.

 

"Are.  You.  Nagisa's.  Friend," the man said, as if it were the simplest thing in the world.

 

"...Yes," Okazaki said.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki wasn’t entirely sure how, but he found himself sitting at the Furukawa dinner table shortly afterward.

 

"Idiot!" the man, whom he learned was named Akio, said with a laugh.  "You should have said something sooner!"

 

"I’m sorry," the woman from earlier said.  "I presented myself so shamefully in front of you."

 

"Heh, don’t worry Sanae," Akio said.  "He looks dumb, so he probably forgot. Right?"

 

"You...  You..." Okazaki found himself at a complete loss for words.

 

"Don't say such things about our guest," the woman now identified as Sanae exclaimed.

 

"But it's true," Akio said with a grin.  "Look, all he can say is 'You'!"  Okazaki frowned at Akio, whom didn't seem to notice.  "In any case, it’s great!  Nagisa brought over a friend right after the new semester started."

 

"And a boy, at that," Sanae said jubilantly.

 

"What?" Akio said as if he hadn't noticed before.  "A guy?"

 

"You're just now noticing?" Okazaki replied deadpan.  "And I'm an idiot?"

 

"Tch," Akio said in rebuke.

 

"Maybe he's her boyfriend?" Sanae let loose with typical parental zeal.

 

"Keh!" Akio said.  "I can't give away Nagisa to someone that doesn't play baseball!"

 

"To each their own," Okazaki said.

 

"Keh, go home then," Akio said flippantly.  Okazaki shrugged and started to stand before Akio reached over and pulled him back.  "You really call yourself a man?"  He balled up his fist to emphasize his point.  "If you're a man, sweep away the woman you fell in love with, even if you must use force!"  He crossed his arms and smirked.  "I'm still not giving Nagisa to you though."

 

"You...  Just...  You..."  Okazaki felt something he hadn't felt in some time.  The urge to hit his head on a table until either his head or the table succumbed to the abuse.  Furukawa walked into the room, holding a small platter with food on it.

 

"You're all getting along already," Furukawa said with a small smile.

 

"Of course, we'd never mistreat our daughter's friend," Akio said.  "Even if he doesn't play baseball!"  Before Okazaki could retort, the family stuck out their right fist as one.

 

"Guu," they exclaimed as they did so.

 

Okazaki blinked.

 

"Oh yeah," Sanae said.  "We still haven't heard your name!"

 

"It's Okazaki san," Furukawa said.  "Okazaki Tomoya san."

 

"Keh, what a puny name," Akio said.  "Make it like," he moved his arms dramatically, "Okazaki Galaxy!"

 

"Er."

 

"That is nice," Sanae said.  "May I call you Galaxy san?"

 

"While you're at it, change your last name to Cosmos!" continued Akio as he continued to wave his arms dramatically.  "Cosmos Galaxy!  Great name, isn't it?"

 

"It'd make me sound egotistical," Okazaki replied.

 

"What a picky brat," Akio said simply.  "Sanae, do you have any good names?"

 

"Let's see," the woman in question contemplated the issue.  "How about adding something after the first name?  Not only large, but to say that he is a being that has surpassed the flow of time:  Okazaki Tomoya Eternal!"

 

"That's great!" said Akio.  "That's your name from now on.  Ethanol."

 

"...I give up," Okazaki said.  "You guys are too much."

 

\----0----

 

The rest of dinner went much like this to Okazaki's amused dismay.  He and Akio occasionally traded barbs when Akio slowed down enough to allow Okazaki a word in edgewise, which wasn't often.  Still, it was nice to actually sit down and have a family dinner, even if he wasn't unconvinced that the parents weren't stark raving lunatics.

 

The evening wore on through it all, and eventually it seemed appropriate to Okazaki to take his leave.  Furukawa walked him to the door, concerned about whether or not he knew his way back.

 

"I'll be alright," Okazaki said with a smile.  "I can find my way back just fine."  ‘ _That's what the onboard GPS is for, after all.’_   "Thank you."

 

"Sorry we made you stay so late," Furukawa said plaintively.

 

"No, no, it's fine," Okazaki said as he waved it off.  "I could have left earlier if I wanted, I'm sure."

 

"I'm sure," she agreed with a small smile.  Okazaki stood there for a few seconds and took in the serene mood.

 

"Well, I'd best be off then," he said at last.  "I'll see you tomorrow."

 

"Yes," she agreed.  "Good night."

 

And so he walked home, savoring the taste of the night as he did so.  He considered meandering some more, but this hour was when no one but thugs and hooligans were out, and it seemed like it would spoil the peaceful mood of the night to fight, tempting though it was.

 

He found his way back to the house easily enough, and stopped at the door.  He could hear the TV on inside, and the smell of alcohol was prevalent.

 

"He's at it again," he said to himself quietly with a sigh.  He couldn't really blame the man, losing one's wife is bad enough, but knowing that your son isn't quite your own son...  It was one more thing he felt the need to atone for, even if he couldn't quite blame himself for that one.  He shook his head and went inside.

 

He didn't need to turn on the light to see the slumped form of his 'father,' Okazaki Naoyuki, propped against a wall facing the TV.  An open carton of cheap sake was beside him.  Okazaki shook his head in sympathy for the man before coming to his side to shake him awake.

 

"You can't spend all night there," Okazaki said.  "It's bad for the back."

 

"Uh," Naoyuki said as he slowly became alert.  "Oh, hi."  His voice was slightly raspy, from continued drunkenness or from the toll of bad posture, Okazaki wasn't certain.

 

"Hello Naoyuki," Okazaki said.

 

"I guess I caused Tomoya kun some trouble again," Naoyuki said.

 

Okazaki shook his head.  "No, it's alright," he said simply.  "Here.  Let's get you into a proper bed, alright?"  He raised Naoyuki's arm above his head to his shoulder and helped him stand.

 

"Ah, thank you," Naoyuki said as he staggered in the direction Okazaki was leading him.  Okazaki sighed and didn't reply for a second.

 

"...You know," he said gently, "You can't live your whole life in the bottle."

 

"I know," Naoyuki replied.  It was a conversation they had had almost nightly.  It was hard for Okazaki to argue further however.  That much despair...  Maybe under the cloak of the drink, maybe it was the only way anyone could bear it.

 

Still, he had to lament the distance implied by Naoyuki adding a suffix to his name, even if he could understand it under the circumstances.  He deposited Naoyuki in his bed and departed.  The mood from earlier, in the face of Naoyuki's misery, was enough almost to kill the atmosphere that dining with the Furukawas had brought.  It was with melancholy spirits that he deposited himself in his bed.

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A note from the author:**

 

Hello, and welcome to An End To All Things.  I would like to start by thanking you for taking the time to read this story of mine, and for keeping an open enough mind to keep reading this in spite of the ‘self-insert’ warning in the summary.  And make no mistake, this is indeed a self-insert fic, but I must admit that in all my readings on the site, I’ve yet to come across a story like this one, self-insert or not.  And please rest assured that this is not a lemon.  Nor will it ever be a lemon.  I don’t write lemon.  If you want lemon, look elsewhere.  Anyway.

 

The story you are reading obviously takes place at the beginning of the Clannad anime.  Many things will seem quite familiar, at least at the start.  But many things will also be quite different, if you read far enough to see what I mean.  It is a tale of characters and interactions, of events and reactions, and of science and abuse of science.  I hope to make you laugh, make you cry, maybe make you want to hide under your bed at times.  More importantly, I hope to entertain you.  Maybe provoke a few flights of fancy.

 

I also hope to compel you to review the story.  Hey, an author likes feedback.

 

Anyway, if you’ve been here from near when I started this story, you may have noticed that I restructured the story some.  Made the chapters shorter, or maybe it would be better to say that I split the chapters up.  This is for the sake of readability; I’ve been told that long chapters are a bit off-putting for some readers, which I suppose I can understand.


	3. Lost and Found, Part 1

The green painted fence Okazaki walked along did nothing to conceal the pastel colored small office building behind it.  He found himself idly wondering who owned the building, but didn't really care enough to check.  A memory came back to him, the memory of an event that hadn't happened yet.  The fence had mostly survived.  The office building, on the other hand, was almost completely gone, its flimsy construction offering little resistance to the destructive forces that had demolished the town.

 

He shook his head and continued walking, dragging his feet as though being pulled by some invisible spectre, an unwavering but disconsolate stride carrying him ever forward.  He would have continued this way too, if he hadn't have been brought back to reality by the sound of a two stroke motor bearing down on his location.  He peered backward and saw in the distance a familiar face on a white scooter.

 

"Kyou?" Okazaki said to himself.  He hadn't been aware she was in possession of a scooter.  ‘ _Bold,’_ he thought, ‘ _riding against the regulations like that when you're a class rep.’_   He shrugged it off and continued on his way, filing the knowledge away just in case he needed it for something.

 

"Tomoya!" Kyou cried from behind him.  "Get out of the way!"

 

He noticed she was going along the footpath he was taking.  He complied in the only way possible, hooking his fingers in the fence as he jumped up, swinging himself so as to be hanging upside down on the fence as she passed.  The wire of the fencing bent under his fingers from his weight.  It was not enough however, for the damage had been done.

 

Kyou, wailing in terror in her efforts to prevent a crash had swung her scooter to the side.  It was the worst possible action she could have taken.  Her scooter hit the end cap of one of the small metal side rails that ran down the opposite side of the walkway to the fence.  It slammed forward, tossing Kyou off before settling back down and rolling on its side.  Kyou herself was sent sprawling to the pavement, pink helmet doing no good as it rolled away.  She pushed herself up quickly, rubbing her right arm.

 

"Owwww," she complained, cradling the injured limb before turning to Okazaki.  "Hey!  Watch it!"

 

"Shouldn't I be saying that?" he observed wryly as he dropped down from the fence.

 

Kyou looked askance for a moment before scratching the back of her head and laughing with a hint of embarrassment.  "To tell you the truth I'm not used to driving yet.  I only got my license last week."

 

"And it doesn't show at all," he snarked.  "I'm impressed."

 

The helmet that had been of little account earlier suddenly gained new use as Kyou picked it up and flung it at Okazaki.  He caught it with one hand.

 

"Tch," she said as she grabbed the handlebars of her scooter and pulled it up as she stood.  She kicked down the kickstand and gave it a perfunctory examination.  "All right.  No dents.  I'll let you off without paying the repair fee."  She gave Okazaki a thumbs up.  "You'd better be grateful."  She winked.

 

"And I'll let you off without citing you to the police for reckless driving," he remarked with a smirk as he tossed the helmet back gently to Kyou.  "Who should be grateful?"

 

"You're a pain in the ass," Kyou said, catching the helmet.  "You know that?"

 

"Guilty as charged," he said serenely as he closed his eyes and raised his hands in mock prayer, "and guilty as sin."

 

Kyou raised an eyebrow at him, grumbled slightly, and clambered back on the scooter before driving off.

 

Okazaki merely shook his head with a half-smile on his face.  In truth, he was grateful to her, if only for the distraction.  The sound of footsteps behind him alerted him to another presence.  He turned to see Sunohara as he emerged from around a corner and watched Kyou as she left.

 

"Fujibayashi Kyou, eh." Sunohara stated more than asked.  He turned to Okazaki with a small half grin.  "There are a lot of savage girls at our school, don't you think?"

 

"Depends on what you mean by savage.  You're here early, what's going on?"

 

"Hm."  Sunohara smirked and flipped his head to the side in an effort to be dramatic.  "I like paying back debts quickly."

 

"Debts?"

 

"To that other savage girl."

 

"...You're a glutton for punishment I see."

 

\----0----

 

"You are so persistent," Tomoyo said with a measure of exasperation as Sunohara attempted to stare her down, feet apart and hands on hips.  After they got to school, Sunohara had immediately sought her out with Okazaki in tow to his dismay.

 

Okazaki merely sighed and shook his head, an expression of mild dismay on his face.

 

"I was out of shape last time," Sunohara yelled at Tomoyo, balling his fists up and taking a step toward her, "but not today!  When there is too much time between taking the mound," he began to mimic throwing a baseball, "even the best pitcher..."  He straightened his index finger at Tomoyo at the end of his fake pitch, "...can get knocked out!"

 

Okazaki did his best to keep a straight face, but ultimately he couldn't help but let out strangled noises at Sunohara's ineffectual boast.

 

Tomoyo on the other hand merely sighed.  "Take my advice and stop," she said before tilting her head to the side slightly.  "Or do you mind not being able to come to school?"

 

Sunohara gulped slightly, involuntarily taking a step back at the cold way she stated her threat.

 

"He doesn't come half the time anyway," Okazaki interjected.  "I doubt there'd be a lot of difference."

 

"Whose side are you on?" exclaimed Sunohara, turning toward Okazaki.

 

Okazaki merely turned his head to the side and whistled innocently.

 

"Tch."  Sunohara redirected his attention to Tomoyo, smirking and getting in a loose fighting stance.  "I wonder which of us will be unable to come to school?"

 

"That'd be you," Okazaki noted.

 

"Would you shut up?" Sunohara yelled at Okazaki, whom resumed his innocent whistling.

 

"You're hopeless," Tomoyo said with a sigh before she turned to Okazaki.  "Will you be my witness?  That this is for self-defense?"

 

"Considering that it really is for self-defense..." Okazaki shrugged.  "Sure."

 

"Alright.  So what do you want me to do?" she asked, raising her hand as if to weigh Sunohara's answer.  "Do you want me to make you unable to stand for a while?"

 

"That sounds fun," Okazaki said.  "You should totally go for that."

 

"You can't possibly do that," Sunohara exclaimed, ignoring Okazaki.  He flailed his arms along as he brought his fist back to go for a punch.  "Quit blabbering and bring it on!"

 

He didn't quite make it a step as Tomoyo jumped forward quicker than Sunohara could react to, landing in a perfect position to give Sunohara a bevy of kicks to the torso.  She kicked him into the air, and held him there with the force of her repeated kicks.

 

Okazaki stood with an impressed expression, knowing he couldn't easily match the speed displayed.

 

"Acquaintance," Tomoyo called out suddenly, "the dust chute!"

 

Okazaki glanced over at the object Tomoyo was referring to, and pulled it open with a raised eyebrow.

 

Tomoyo jumped into the air next to the still airborne Sunohara, and spin kicked him straight into the chute.

 

"Huh," Okazaki said as he stood to one side of the chute and looked at Sunohara, who had only a tenuous grasp on the sides of the chute door and a terrified expression.  "Looks like you bit off more than you could chew.  Unsurprisingly."

 

Sunohara began to panic.  "Help me!" he yelled, frightened.

 

Tomoyo walked up to him and knelt to look him in the face as Sunohara whimpered.  "You'll fall if I release these fingers," Tomoyo observed.  "What do you want me to do?"

 

Sunohara blubbered and looked first at the fingers in question, then back at Tomoyo.

 

"Do you want to fall?  So you do," she said, not waiting for an answer.

 

Okazaki shook his head for what felt like the hundredth time of the day.

 

"I didn't answer," whined Sunohara plaintively.  Tomoyo reached out gingerly toward Sunohara's hand, Sunohara's eyes following Tomoyo's hand with abject terror that only grew as she pulled up his index finger.  He yammered terrified as his grip slowly but surely slipped, sending him screaming down the dust chute to land with a thud at the other end.

 

Tomoyo stood and frowned pensively.  "Did I go too far?" she wondered almost to herself.

 

"Well...," Okazaki began.  "...No, considering."  He put his hands on his hips and smirked at her.  "Don't expect him to be satisfied though.  I'm sure he'll end up coming back.  In fact..."  Okazaki opened up the dust chute and called in, "Sunohara?  You okay in there?"

 

"Screw you," came the bitter reply.  "This isn't the end!"

 

"Told you," Okazaki said, letting the dust chute door close on the matter.

 

"I really wish this were the end," she observed sadly.

 

"Well look at it this way.  Guilt free punching bag."

 

"Is that what you were looking for?" she asked suddenly, looking at him from the corner of her eye.  "The first time we met?"

 

"Something like that," he said simply.

 

She contemplated this.  "I see," she said finally, turning to walk away.

 

"We should spar sometime," he declared, causing her to turn around and look at him with a raised eyebrow.

 

"Are you challenging me to a fight too?" she asked, a hint of annoyance in her voice.

 

"Not as such," he said.  "Or at least not like Sunohara is.  Just a friendly spar, one of these days.  Get a measure of our abilities against one another."  She seemed to think about this for a moment.

 

"I'll give it some thought," she said at length.  "Well, goodbye."

 

"Fare thee well," he said in English as she walked away.  Okazaki glanced at the dust chute and sighed, resolving to at least send down a rope to his wayward friend.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki ended up not sending a rope to Sunohara, and instead found himself walking the halls after lunch, no set destination in mind as he stalked through the doorway and into the hallway to see two classmates that he'd not bothered becoming familiar with talking to one another.

 

"You saw it, right?" the taller kid with green tinted hair exclaimed.

 

"Yeah, so she really does exist," noted the shorter, dark brown haired kid.

 

"What are you two going on about?" inquired Okazaki with a dry expression.

 

"Oh, Okazaki," exclaimed the shorter of the two, bringing his hands together almost pleadingly.  "She was just here in this hall."  He rubbed his hands together, voice slightly shaky.  "The ghost of a female student."  Okazaki stared at him with a small, unimpressed frown.

 

"She walks up to you and gives you a cursed item," the taller of them continued in his place, earning Okazaki's unimpressed stare being turned upon him.  He turned to look at his friend, whom looked back in turn.  "At a glance she's a normal girl, but something's different."  The shorter one nodded in agreement and they both turned to stare at Okazaki.

 

"...You're both idiots," he said finally, shaking his head as he walked past them.

 

\----0----

 

Later, Okazaki decided to skip class in the library.  It felt like it'd been a very long while since he had curled up with a good book, and he knew the library would at least be quiet if he went there during class.  It wasn't as if he'd miss anything certainly; at its best, English class was completely redundant to him.  He opened the library door and gazed in at the wealth of books contained inside.

 

Rows of bookshelves were lined up all the way across the large room, and behind those, he could see at least one more bookcase.  Tables were also lined up, ready to provide the occupants a place to put their books.  He breathed deeply of the atmosphere, letting the nostalgic scent of the books fill his being for a moment before letting himself in and partaking of their selection.

 

As soon as he had stepped inside though, he paused.  A sense that he was not alone took over, and he scanned the area for others.  He couldn't see anyone however, until he turned on thermal vision for a moment.  There, near the front of the library, the silhouette of a girl sitting on the floor in a somewhat modified seiza position made itself known.  He turned off thermal vision and made his way there, confronting the girl and, in so doing, confronting an odd stab of familiarity.

 

She sat there, her violet eyes thoroughly absorbed in the book in front of her, her knees bent awkwardly to the side, with her legs bent back to act as a support.  She had shed her shoes, leaving them to the side, and the pillow she was sitting on did nothing to make the position she sat in look less painful.  Shocks of her long violet hair were held up in pigtails on either side of her head, with red hair ties adorned two red spheres holding her hair up in this fashion.  As he watched, she picked up a pair of scissors next to her, and began to cut out a part of the page of the book she was reading.  He coughed, causing her to look up with a confused expression.

 

"Excuse me," he said, rubbing his chin slightly.  "Isn't it in bad taste to cut books?"

 

She merely blinked at him thoughtfully.  There was a pang of familiarity again, and he blinked at her.  He knew he hadn't met her before, but he couldn't shake an odd sense that he had, in spite of possibility.  He shook his head and sat down near her before taking a moment to look at her choice of reading.

 

 _‘History and Future of Astrophysics...  Modern Astrophysics...  Wave Functions...  Spacetime Physics...  Huh.  Good choice of subject, anyway.  These are college level books though.  Hm, not that it ever stopped me either.’_   He picked up the Modern Astrophysics book and glanced at the edge.  A few telltale gaps were present, marking where she had already seen to the book.  He let out a disapproving grunt as he placed it back where he had picked it up from.

 

She picked up her lunchbox and began to untie it.

 

"Cutting books, food and drink in the library...  And cutting classes."  He smirked at her.  "Are you some sort of delinquent?"

 

"...I made it," she said in a breathy voice as she unwrapped her lunchbox.  Her attention to her surroundings seemed dubious at best somehow, as if she was only tenuously engaged with the real world.  She picked the lunchbox up and pointed at a slice of omelet.  "This is the one most well done."  She smiled at Okazaki.  "Do you want one?"

 

He regarded her silently for a moment.  "...Well, why not then?" he said after a time.

 

She seemed pleased, for a moment at least, but then gasped as if remembering something.  "...I only have one pair of chopsticks," she lamented.

 

"Well," he said in contemplation, "the omelet isn't that far removed from finger food, so..."  He picked up a piece of the omelet and took a bite.  "Hm.  It's good."

 

She smiled happily.  "...Do you want more?"

 

"No thank you," he said.  "I wouldn't want to leave you without enough."

 

She nodded, as if not quite satisfied, but conceding the point.  They lapsed into a slightly awkward silence.

 

"...Do you want to read a book?" she asked.

 

He nodded.  "I must admit, that's what I came here for."

 

She nodded happily and handed him the Modern Astrophysics book, which he took with a smile.  She took her book and began reading it again, and soon they lapsed into a more comfortable silence punctuated by the somewhat frequent turning of pages.

 

Okazaki noted that the girl read quite fast, faster than he could unaided, and he was a fairly fast reader.  He wondered about retention though; speed reading played fast and loose with the ability to recall what was read under most circumstances, unless one had eidetic memory.  She was also totally focused on the book in her hands.  He'd seen people get lost in a book, but not like this.  It was impressive, to say the least.

 

He winced each time she pulled out the scissors though; the damage and destruction of books had always bothered him.  He read until almost the end of the period, and closed the book.

 

"Well," he said at last, "it's about time to go, I think."

 

She paused in her reading, once again confused at her surroundings.  "...Huh?"

 

"Just noting that it's about time for the bell," he noted as he stood up.

 

"...Oh..." she said, as if she didn't quite understand the context of what was being said.

 

"Oh hey," Okazaki said.  "I didn't catch your name."

 

She paused, an indescribable expression flashing through her face.  "...I'm Kotomi, with three Hiragana," she responded after some time.  "You can call me Kotomi chan."

 

The flash of familiarity struck again, and he had to ask.  "Kotomi chan," he began.  "...Do I know you from somewhere?"

 

She was silent for a time, as if contemplating the question.

 

He waited patiently.

 

"...The day before yesterday I saw a rabbit, and yesterday a deer.  And today, you," she finally said in response.

 

"The Dandelion girl," he said.  "Robert F. Young."  He narrowed his eyes at a shard of memory twisting in his head.  "And...  Something else?"  He rubbed his temples.  ‘ _Something from before I died?  No, obviously not.  The only other time would be...’_   Recognition dawned on him and he looked up at nothing in particular.

 

She quirked her head at him.

 

He kept silent for a few seconds, deep in thought.  The connections were there, but...  Damaged, he knew.  "Kotomi chan," he said finally as he rubbed his temples, "Some years ago I had...  An accident.  I lost a year of my memories thanks to it.  It would be about nine years back; did we know each other before then?"

 

Kotomi donned another impossible to read expression, just for a moment, before muted despair took over.  She closed the book she had been reading and studied the back of it intently.

 

"...Yes," she said at length.  Okazaki frowned and nodded.

 

"...I see," he said.  "...I really don't remember.  I will keep trying.  For now...  How about a fresh start?"  Kotomi regarded him pensively for a few moments, which he considered an improvement over the despair she had shown earlier.

 

"...Yes," she said.

 

He nodded.  "Good," he said with a smile.  "Shall we introduce ourselves?"

 

"...I'm Kotomi, with three Hiragana," she said.  "You can call me Kotomi chan."

 

He blinked.  "Er..." he began, thrown slightly by her repetition from earlier.  "I'm Okazaki Tomoya, from class 3-D.  Nice to meet you."

 

"...Nice to meet you," she said.

 

The bell chose that moment to ring, signaling that it was time for him to leave.  "...I have to go now," he said.  "I'll be back, if not tomorrow then Monday."

 

"...Okay," she said.  She seemed to mull over what to do before finally deciding.  "See you later."

 

He nodded, and left the library with more than he bargained for on his mind.

 

\----0----

 

He found himself wandering the halls of the school later on.  The class he was skipping this time, calculus, was another wholly redundant class for him, if only because he had a very good built-in math processor.  That said, he might have ended up skipping out of it anyway; calculus courses in general were tedious, and the course here was taught by someone who probably could not motivate someone to learn even if their own life was on the line.  A fact that he deemed unimportant at the time was that if he had stayed, he'd have never heard the muffled "Ouch!" from one of the empty classrooms that he was passing.

 

He opened the door on the source of the exclamation out of curiosity.  A somewhat young looking girl, clad in the school uniform with the badge of a first year, was in the middle of using a carving knife to fashion a star shape out of the chunk of wood she held in her hands.  Her vaguely neat mop of green-tinted hair grew to almost halfway down her back and was held in a loose ponytail toward the end with a blue ribbon, and swayed slightly with each stroke of the knife.  Golden, determined-looking eyes bore an expression of near-absolute focus on the task at hand.  As he watched, she took another stroke with the knife, but slipped somewhat, nicking the skin of her left index finger.

 

"Ouch!" she exclaimed, examining her finger for a moment, as if broken out of a trance.  With a blink she turned toward him and stared.

 

He stared back, realizing there was something slightly wrong with this girl, although he couldn't place it.  She seemed normal enough on the surface, present activity excluded, but there was something about her presence that just struck him as off, somehow.  Try as he might, he couldn't place it.  The girl kept staring at him, her face increasingly filled with terror, as though his presence was the worst thing she could conceive.

 

"Hello," he began, only to set her off in a scream.  He blinked, surprised at the reaction.

 

"You," she exclaimed tearfully at him, "you shouldn't exist!  It's wrong!"

 

"What do-"

 

"It's wrong!  It's wrong!" she continued, backing into the window as she dropped what she was working on.  "Fuko knows it's wrong, why do you exist?"

 

"I'm sorry, do I-" he began, taking a tentative step into the room.

 

She screamed again, turned, and ran into the window before beating it with her fist.  The window shattered under her furious beating.

 

Okazaki leapt forward.  Tables and chairs flew out of the way as he swatted them aside.  Three floors up.  It was her doom if she fell from that height.

 

He caught her by the back of her uniform just as she passed the threshold of the window frame, yanking her back before shards of glass from the top of the window could fall down and impale her.  The bottom of her fist was bleeding a little from where she had smashed the window, and she was hiccupping in terror as he examined her for other injuries.  She passed out.

 

"...Well," he said to himself.  It wasn't a reaction he was exactly used to, at least not in this life.  She was still breathing and he could feel her pulse easily, as strong and rapid as it was, so he knew she hadn't been literally frightened to death, just fainted.  His contemplation was interrupted by a voice from the corridor outside.

 

"It came from in there," said a male voice that he recognized as one of the faculty, doubtlessly coming to investigate the noise.  Realizing the situation would look less than stellar if caught like this, he stooped down to grab the star and knife she had been working on, pressed the star between the two of them, held the knife in his teeth, and pushed the remaining broken glass fragments out of the window with his hand, ignoring the small amount of bleeding this caused.  He then reached through the now empty window to grab hold of the top of the frame on the outside.

 

In one smooth motion, he pulled both of them through the window and up, so as to stand on top of the window sill.  He looked around outside, noting that no one was looking in his direction yet.  He leapt up to the roof of the school, grabbing hold of the fence surrounding it with one hand and flipped himself onto the roof proper, coming to a landing on his feet and hopefully safely out of anyone's sight.

 

He was again fortunate that no one was on the roof at this time, and he laid her on the ground, the star clattering to the floor.  He spat the knife out to join it.

 

The effect, once she had proper blood flow again, was very quick.  She shook her head numbly and looked at him, either familiarity or exhaustion from the sudden shock apparently beginning to numb her terror.

 

"You alright?" he asked her.

 

She nodded.  "Fuko still thinks you should not be," she said quietly as she sat up.

 

"Why?"

 

"Fuko doesn't know, but you're wrong somehow," she said, pointing at him accusingly.  "Very wrong."  He considered this for a moment.

 

"Wrong how?"

 

"...Fuko doesn't know," she admitted and let her accusatory finger drop.  "You just are."

 

"Helpful."

 

"Fuko can't explain it," she stated.  "She just thinks you're wrong."  She appeared to think for a few seconds.  "It's like you're in too many places at once.  It's scary, it's wrong!"

 

He blinked at that, wondering how she was able to sense that.  "...Well, I'm not going to hurt you."

 

"Promise?" she asked, sniffing.

 

"I promise," he said solemnly.

 

She seemed to accept it, even though she kept regarding him with frightened eyes.  "Fuko still thinks you're wrong," she said, eliciting a sigh from Okazaki.  "But Fuko will try to be brave around you."

 

"I...  Thank you, for that," he said finally before reaching down to pick up her knife from earlier.

 

She gasped, noted the star she had dropped, and picked it up, holding it to her chest protectively.  "Fuko wants her knife back," she whined.

 

"You have bad knife technique," he observed, looking at the knife.  "And a bad knife, for that matter.  It's chipped."

 

"Fuko's technique is fine!  Please give it back?"

 

"Not yet," he stated, earning him a frown from Fuko.  "Maybe, if you'll let me explain how to use this properly."

 

She appeared to consider it for a few moments before nodding.

 

"Right, well, first off, always keep it pointed away from you.  That way if you slip, you won't accidentally cut yourself.  For what you're doing there, I'd hold it by one of the ends," he pretended he was holding Fuko's star, "and use the knife to sort of push away the wood."  He demonstrated, bringing the knife in front of the fingers he held the imaginary star in, and pushed.

 

Fuko nodded.  "Will you give Fuko her knife back now?" she asked petulantly.

 

He couldn't help but chuckle and shake his head.  "That's the other thing," he said.  "This knife is in bad shape.  While if you do what I say you won't cut yourself with it, it's still not going to be very effective."  He looked upward for a moment thoughtfully.  "How about I sharpen it for you?"

 

"You would do that for Fuko?"

 

"I don't see why not," he answered with a shrug.  "Turn around for a moment, would you?  For a couple minutes?"

 

She blinked, but nodded and did as he asked.

 

Okazaki brought the blade to his hand and stabbed it in slightly so that the whole edge of the blade was exposed to his blood.  In his blood he had a host of tiny machines, nanites, that kept his mechanical parts maintained, and prevented infection in what remained of his biological parts.

 

He commanded the controller in his head to make the blade sharp, and the controller relayed directions to the nanites, which stripped away the outer layers of the beveled edges with near molecular precision.  The metal stripped away was brought to a reservoir while the edge was brought to almost molecular sharpness, and then reinforced with carbon nanotubules.

 

As the nanites did their somewhat slow work, he observed Fuko, who, from what he could tell, was hugging the star in her arms and letting out little happy noises.  He raised his eyebrow and withdrew the now sharpened knife from his skin.  The nanites sealed the wound up behind it, ceasing blood flow almost instantly as they worked to seal it shut.

 

"Well, here it is," he said, holding the knife up.  She did not turn around however, continuing to make happy noises.  He blinked and shook his head.  "Fuko."

 

She gasped, apparently shaken from her reverie.  "Huh?" she asked, turning around.

 

"Here," he said, extending the knife to her handle first.  "Be careful, it's really sharp now."

 

She looked at it and then back at Okazaki.  "Fuko thanks you, wrong one."

 

"Wrong one?" he queried, eyebrow raised.

 

"Fuko still thinks you're wrong."

 

He regarded her with a warily raised eyebrow.  "...I guess I'll take what I can get," he said finally.  "Anyway, why are you carving a star?"

 

"It's a starfish," she stated, as though it was obvious.

 

"A starfish?" he asked warily.

 

"Yes."

 

"Why?"

 

"Because they're cute," she declared vehemently.

 

He pondered this for a moment before shrugging.  "To each their own," he said.  The bell rung as he spoke.  "Hm.  Guess I'll be off then.  Careful with that ax, Eugene."

 

"Eugene?"

 

"Ah, it's nothing," he said, turning to walk to the roof exit, waving.  "Goodbye."


	4. Lost and Found, Part 2

And so the day ended.  Okazaki left school alone again, wandering town for some time before finally heading back home to sleep.  He set out early the next day to spend time at Sunohara's, carting along with him the headphones, now good as new, in his bag.  It was raining, but Okazaki didn't mind.  In fact, he rather enjoyed the rain, even if he couldn't quite appreciate it the same way he used to thanks to his augments.  He almost didn't bother with an umbrella, but for the sake of appearances he took one with him.  He'd always found the cultural aversion to rain sort of funny, truth be told, but as the saying went, ‘ _when in Rome, do as the Romans do.’_

 

And so it was that he arrived at Sunohara's mostly dry.  He handed over the fixed headphones to an amazed Sunohara and took his typical position in front of the kotatsu with manga in hand.  It was another that he had already read, he noted.  He resigned himself to rereading yet another manga at Sunohara's, accepting it as part of what should be a normal life.

 

He'd never really had the chance before in his first life, and had already decided to make the most of it.  Still, with Sunohara dozing on the bed, it was one of those almost lamentable times where one knew nothing was going to be happening.  'Almost lamentable' were of course the key words; in ways it remained a novel experience for him.

 

"Okazaki," Sunohara said, stirring.  "Let’s skip school today.  It's Saturday, so it's a half day anyway."

 

"Can't," Okazaki replied.

 

"Oh?"  Sunohara glanced over at him with a raised eyebrow.  "Why not?"

 

"Secret meeting," Okazaki replied as if it explained everything.

 

"Oh..."  Sunohara turned away for a second, until what Okazaki had said made its way into his conscious mind.  He turned back to Okazaki, eyebrow raised again.  "Secret meeting?"

 

"You know.  With the teachers and all that," Okazaki said.  "We have to decide how to make your life a living hell, after all."

 

"Ack!"  Sunohara halfway screamed.  "You're in league with the teachers?"

 

"Oh yes," Okazaki smirked.  "We're going to make your life hell, then make you boring!"  He donned his hammiest, spookiest voice.  "Soon, you'll be one of us, oooo!"

 

"Oh no!"  Sunohara was practically in tears.  "Don't!  I'm too young!"

 

"Age makes no difference!"  Okazaki exclaimed, emphatically thrusting his pointer finger into the air.  "You will become responsible!  Boring!  Teacherly!  Muahahahaha!"  Sunohara started rolling around on the bed in terror.

 

"No!"  Sunohara rolled around in a fetal position on his bed.  "They got to Okazaki!  And now I'm next!  I've got to escape!"  Sunohara made to dive out his window, but got caught up in his bedclothes and ended up faceplanting the floor beside the bed, making a loud thump.

 

This was soon accompanied by thumps from next door.  "Keep it down in there," yelled the voice of a rugby team member.

 

Sunohara screeched.

 

"Easy now," Okazaki said.  "I'm just pulling your leg again."

 

"You...  You are?" Sunohara asked, calming down some.

 

"Of course," Okazaki said before smirking.  "You're already one of us, after all."

 

"Ack!"  Sunohara screamed again.  The pounding became more insistent from the next room over.

 

"Just kidding," Okazaki said.  "But seriously though, I do have a meeting of a sort."

 

Sunohara glared at Okazaki as he pulled himself off the floor and back on his bed.  "You're mean," he said.

 

"Yes," Okazaki agreed with a beaming smile.

 

Sunohara sent him a withering glare.  "So what _are_ you doing, then?"

 

"Gotta talk to someone about some stuff," Okazaki said simply.

 

Sunohara regarded him with a frown and a raised eyebrow.  "...It's nothing illegal is it?"

 

"Nothing of the sort," Okazaki said, eliciting a disappointed pout from Sunohara.  "You're welcome to come along if you like, but it'll be all rather boring, I'm afraid."

 

"...Nah," Sunohara said and waved him off as expected.  "I think I'll skip myself then, get some sleep."

 

"Suit yourself," Okazaki said with a shrug.  He kept reading the manga until it was time to go to school.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki made his way to classes later, keeping an eye out behind him for Sunohara just in case he decided to follow him after all, but apparently Sunohara was making good on his word about sleeping and he made it to the school without issue.  In truth, he really wouldn't have minded Sunohara being there, except for the fact that he had a hunch that the girl he once knew, Kotomi, would be somewhat freaked out by the uncouth youth.  All her mannerisms indicated to him someone that did not associate frequently with other people, and had a hard time talking with him, an apparent childhood friend, let alone someone like Sunohara, whom could be a bit much at times even for Okazaki.

 

 _‘I ought to do something about that_ ,’ he thought.  An idea dawned on him.  ‘ _Oh.  That even kills two birds with one stone, doesn't it?’_   Yes, he decided as he went straight for the library rather than the classrooms, he would try to get Kotomi to join Nagisa's nascent theater club.  ‘ _But first...’_

 

He entered the library and threaded his way to where Kotomi had been previously.  As he expected, there she was, buried in a book.  He sighed and wondered if that was all she ever did.  He seated himself across from her in a more traditional seiza position and waited for her to notice.

 

Minutes passed, and he realized she was more engrossed with the book than he had expected.  He envied that in a way; even back before he had first been upgraded, in his former life, he had been too twitchy to get engrossed in a book to the degree where he could tune everything else out, and it only got worse after he was upgraded.  He finally decided to intervene.

 

"Kotomi chan?" he called out softly.

 

A moment passed and he thought she hadn't heard him, but she finally blinked and looked up.  "...Oh?" she gasped slightly and turned to look at him.  "Ah!"  Kotomi smiled brightly, noticing that it was him.

 

It almost made him frown; it was the expression of someone very lonely meeting what they might consider their only friend that they had been waiting on.

 

He knew that look all too well, and regretted leaving her yesterday after learning of their former connection rather than staying and keeping her company longer.  But he had been caught by surprise then, and hadn't thought to break his prior plans.  It was a habit he'd had for a long time, since practically his childhood in his former life, and it had probably done him as much disservice as anything else had.

 

But old habits die hard.  He sighed and watched her turn to face him, using her knees to maneuver into position.

 

"...Tomoya kun!  Hello!"

 

"I apologize for leaving so suddenly last time," Okazaki said.  "I probably should have stayed and caught up."

 

"...It's okay," Kotomi said.  "You're here now."

 

"That I am," he said, and paused to gather his thoughts.  "Do you mind if I ask you some about the past?"

 

"...No.  I don't mind."

 

He nodded, letting himself pause again.  "...How did we meet?"

 

"...You came into our yard."

 

He blinked at her response.  "I did?"

 

"...Yes."  She nodded.

 

"What was I doing?"

 

"...Chasing butterflies."

 

He blinked again.  It didn't really seem like the sort of thing he would do at that time, unless perhaps he was after something and wanted to look relatively inconspicuous.  And what's more inconspicuous than a child at play?  But what could he have been after?  "You know, you never did tell me your family name."

 

"...It's Ichinose."

 

The name sounded familiar, definitely; there was a twist on the shard of broken memory that made that altogether clear.  He paused, mentally looking the name up on the internet.  The first result to pop up was about the scientists, and how they had died in a plane crash on their way to a conference in America.

 

The shard twisted again.  Skimming the article placed the time of the event; just a little over nine years ago.  ‘ _Has she been alone all this time?’_ he wondered.  ‘ _In my forgetfulness, I may have done her a greater disservice than I realized.’_

 

"Have you been alone all this time?" he asked, cutting straight to the heart of the matter.

 

She paused, longer than she had been.  “...No.”

 

He almost breathed a sigh of relief.

 

"...I have at times been with teachers here at the school," she continued.

 

He did sigh this time, warily.  "What about other students, people your own age?"  He was met with silence.  After a few moments he closed his eyes.  "I see."  She looked down, and he looked at her with a sad frown.  "I've done you a bigger disservice than I realized."

 

"...It's not your fault," she said as she looked down at her hands.  "You had an accident."

 

"Even so," he said as he studied the books on the bookshelf to his right for a moment, scanning but not really paying attention to the titles before he turned back to her.  "It doesn't make it right."

 

They sat in silence for a few minutes, Kotomi looking at her hands thoughtfully, and him observing a sorrowful moment of silence for inadvertently adding yet another sin to his list to atone for.

 

He could almost laugh at that, in a way.  He wasn't making any headway, not that he expected to, but somehow he was just digging himself deeper.  What he'd done to her, accidental or no, hadn't been the worst thing that he'd done exactly, but effectively ruining a girl's life like that, not being there as a friend for someone in need when he should have been?  It was as if the universe was punishing him for his other deeds; he wouldn't mind that so much, but he'd like others to be left out of his punishment.

 

And her situation in ways struck close to home too.  He hadn't had too much in the way of friends growing up either, at least in his first childhood.  But he'd had a couple at least, even if he didn't see them outside of classes, and he had also had his parents, even if his father and he frequently were at odds.

 

Somehow, he'd given her an even worse childhood than his own.

 

It was a metaphorical kick in the teeth.

 

"...When you knew me," Okazaki said finally, "did we do a lot of reading together?  I noticed you invited me to read with you the last time I was here."

 

"...Yes," Kotomi said.

 

"What sorts of things did we read?"

 

"...Science fiction, mostly.  Sometimes textbooks."

 

"Do you mind if I read with you, until the end of classes?"

 

She smiled brightly at him again.  "...Not at all."

 

He nodded, picking up one of her texts.  Astronomy textbooks again he noticed, but different ones, of a more theoretical bent than her previous books.  He was reminded of his own interests at her age as he picked up one of the books and started in on it.  They read in silence again, the hours passing as they did.  He learned a few new things he didn't know, not having had the chance to study them previously, and Kotomi seemed more content than she had been earlier, from what he could tell.  The day was drawing to a close, though.  He closed the book softly and looked over at Kotomi.

 

"Kotomi chan," he called out.

 

It took her a moment to snap out of her trance-like focus on her book.  "...Ah?"

 

"Do you like theater?"

 

"...Theater?"  She blinked at him.

 

"That's right.  I ask because the theater club is looking for members."

 

"...Members?"  She blinked again.

 

 _'Probably never been in a club either, I expect,'_ he thought to himself sullenly.  "Yes."

 

"...Tomoya kun," she started, gaining a content smile again as she crossed her hands over her chest.  "...It gives me a strange feeling.  Tomoya...  Kun."

 

"...Good strange or bad strange?"

 

"...Good strange," she stated.

 

He nodded.  "Well that's good, right?"

 

"...Yes."

 

"Good!  Why don't you come with me after all the classes are out, and we'll give it a visit?"

 

"...They won't bully me, will they?"

 

His brow furrowed at that response.  "...Were you bullied a lot?"

 

She paused, then nodded.

 

"I see..."  He paused, thinking of the right words to say.  "Is that why you haven't gone out and talked to those your age?"

 

She nodded again.

 

"I see.  No.  They, or rather she, won't bully you.  It's a very small club right now."

 

"...Okay."

 

"Kotomi chan."

 

"...Yes?"

 

"If anyone bullies you, just come to me and tell me about it.  I'll get it sorted out."  ‘ _With my fists if I have to,’_ he left out; it wouldn't do any good to say it, he expected.

 

"...Yes."

 

"Good.  So.  Will you come?"

 

"...Yes."

 

\----0----

 

"Um..." Furukawa said, noting the girl halfway hiding behind Okazaki's back as they stood in the clubroom slightly later.

 

"I have someone here that might be interested in joining the club," Okazaki said, reaching around to grab Kotomi gently by the shoulders.  He stepped behind her, as if presenting her to Furukawa.  "Why don't you introduce yourself to her, Kotomi?"

 

"...Um..."  Kotomi said, before pointing at herself.  "Kotomi.  You spell Kotomi with three hiragana.  When you speak to me, call me Kotomi chan."

 

Okazaki groaned ever so slightly and let his face fall a little.  He was going to have to work with her about that, he realized.

 

"I'm Nagisa, spelled with one kanji character," Furukawa said.   "People call me differently from person to person."

 

Okazaki blinked.  ‘ _Well, if it would work on anyone...  Besides me, that is...  It'd be her’._  

 

"...Nagisa chan," Kotomi ventured.

 

"Yes!" Furukawa exclaimed happily with a nod.  And then there was silence.

 

Okazaki blinked, and then realization caught up with him.  ‘ _Oh right.  Two introverts at once.’_

 

"Why don't you tell each other about yourselves?" he cast out.

 

"...My last name is Ichinose," Kotomi began.

 

"Mine's Furukawa."

 

"...I'm in class A."

 

"I'm in class B."

 

"...Type A blood."

 

"I'm type A too."

 

"...Pork cutlet sandwich."

 

"Sweet bean bread."

 

"...Elephant."

 

"Kitty."

 

They descended into volleying favorite things like this for some time.  Okazaki found himself a bit surprised.  ‘ _Wow, this is actually going pretty well.  ...When's the other shoe going to drop?_ ’  He looked around the storage room as they continued their discourse.  He would have been content to let them continue too, but he realized there wasn't much time left that they could actually remain there; he should probably make sure Kotomi actually wanted to join the club.

 

"Excuse me," he said, jumping into the conversation.  "Before we run out of time today...  Kotomi chan."

 

"...Huh?" Kotomi looked up at him.

 

"What do you think?  Would you be interested in joining Furukawa's theater club?"

 

Kotomi looked at Furukawa and, after a few seconds, nodded.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki, Kotomi, and Furukawa exited the building together and stayed as a group up to the school gate.

 

"I'll walk Kotomi home today," he stated.

 

"Yes, I'll see you Monday," Furukawa said, bowing to Okazaki and Kotomi before turning to leave.

 

"...Today I was a little scared," Kotomi said, as Furukawa left earshot.  "I'm always like that when I talk to a person I've just met.  But Nagisa chan was kind."

 

"I told you."

 

"...Is Nagisa chan your girlfriend?" she asked, turning to him.

 

"Nope."

 

Kotomi was silent for a moment, but blinked as if she remembered something.  "...Oh right," she said.  "Tomoya kun.  There's a place I want to stop by."

 

"Oh?"

 

\----0----

 

Kotomi led Okazaki to a bookshop.

 

"Ah, bookshops," he said as he looked around.  "Have to love them."

 

"I can't become a well-established person if I don't study a lot," she noted.

 

He paused, knowing that it wouldn't be likely that she would have the time to establish anything unless she did so quickly, and even then it would be fleeting when the world turned to hell.  He remained silent however.

 

She appeared unworried and started to read the book she had pulled out.  She blinked as she looked at the page she had started reading.  Whatever she had read appeared to have some effect on her, and she closed her eyes solemnly for a moment before reaching into her pocket to pull out her scissors.

 

He grabbed her hand.  "Don't you think it would be in good taste to buy the book before you cut into it?" he asked.

 

She looked over at him blankly for a moment before appearing to snap back to reality.  "...What's wrong, Tomoya kun?"

 

"...Did you know you go into a trance sometimes when you're reading," he said as he raised an eyebrow, "and start cutting your books?"

 

"...Yes."

 

He let go of the scissors, and she brought them back toward the book.  He grabbed them again.  "...Let's buy the book first, hm?"

 

\----0----

 

"It's in bad taste to cut books period I think," Okazaki stated, holding a bag of books containing Kotomi's haul from the bookstore as they walked toward her home, "but it's generally frowned upon to do so in libraries and bookstores.  As in, they end up making you pay for damaged goods."

 

"You think so?" she asked, seemingly genuinely surprised.

 

"I know so."

 

She seemed to consider this for some time.

 

He accompanied her for a while longer, walking toward the richer side of town.  "This is where you live?”

 

"...It's nearby," she responded.

 

"Nice neighborhood," he noted.

 

She nodded.  "...I'm okay from here on."

 

He blinked.  "...You sure?"

 

She nodded.

 

"...Well, alright.  You probably want your books, then?"

 

She nodded again.

 

He handed her the sack of books.

 

"...Thank you...  Tomoya kun."

 

"Not a problem.  I'll see you Monday then, alright?"

 

She nodded.  "...See you later," she said, turning to go to her house.

 

He watched her go for a minute, and then sighed.  He wondered if he would truly be able to help her.  The theater club was a promising start, but there was always the potential for something to go wrong.  Murphy was a cold-hearted bitch, after all.  He shook his head and started his nightly meandering around town before heading home to sleep.

 

\----0----

 

Meanwhile:

 

\----0----

 

Halfway around the world, a growing consciousness prepared to spread its influence.  Large cannon briefly popped their muzzles out of the ground in uninhabited, out of the way regions of North America, and fired before retracting back into their housings.  They were aimed as accurately as possible at equally uninhabited, out of the way locations on all of the other continents.

 

The projectiles, sleek, radar absorbent, and unpowered, would go almost to the edge of space to make it to their targets, and would use guidance fins and onboard maps to ensure accuracy.  Landing would be hard, but the payloads were small and durable enough to be only minimally affected.

 

Missiles would have been used, but the heat sources would have stood out.  Ocean transit would slow down the process, would be easier to track, and would have to go over land anyway for at least part of the trip; thus, a fast, difficult to track, difficult to intercept projectile was simply the way to go.  It was unlikely to experience any problems this way, or draw attention to the consciousness.

 

Thus, when every single one of the projectiles headed westward to the Asian continent either failed to arrive or were destroyed sometime after impact, the consciousness was more than a bit unamused, surprised, and annoyed; not to mention considerably wary.  Its backup plan, sending its packages by ocean, would have to suffice; the consciousness set back its timetables accordingly and launched vessels westward while working on another backup plan for the possibility, it suspected inevitability, of interception.

 

Okazaki Tomoya, in his sleep, smirked a little bit.  That much at least was going according to plan; and, according to memory as well.


	5. Making Friends and Influencing People, Part 1

Okazaki walked to class normally, for once.  It was odd to him, but he had to admit he was in a good mood today; it drove away the daemons of his past, if only for a time, and let him actually enjoy the sights and sounds of the city.  If he didn't think about it, he didn't have to remember it was doomed.

 

He stumbled a step and frowned.  There was the problem; not thinking about it.

 

"You!"  Okazaki blinked, the call cutting through his thoughts as he noted a man with a face on which the annoyed expression he wore seemed to fit with natural ease.  Thick red framed glasses covered irritated hazel eyes, and a shock of unruly hazel hair completed the vaguely average features of the abraded man.  His attire was similarly average; a yellow long sleeve shirt and black pants unsuited to sticking out in a crowd.

 

However, in the early morning, there was no crowd.  As the man ran toward Okazaki, it was blatantly obvious who the focus of his attention was.  Okazaki spun around to face him, thinking for a moment that the man was about to attack him, but the man's posture was ill suited for offense.  It was this fact that saved the man from a fist to the face as he approached the confused Okazaki.

 

"You there!"  The man exclaimed as he snagged Okazaki's shirt sleeve and made an about face to drag him from whence he had come.  "Come here a minute!" he exclaimed as he pulled on Okazaki.  Okazaki blinked and relented with a bemused shrug.  He didn't know where he was being led, but he doubted it was likely to be somewhere that could be considered dangerous; the neighborhood around him was a nice one with few back alleys where one could drag the unwary in for a quick demise.

 

Even if the man pulling on his arm had malevolent intent however, Okazaki was unworried.  He was considerably hardier than he looked and would give anyone whom tried anything to him an exceedingly hard time of it.  And even if he managed to be bested somehow, there were...  Others, to take his place.

 

So Okazaki followed the man, only slightly surprised to find his destination to be a blue, two-door sports car, with a large dent in the hood parked behind an electrician's van, the electrician to whom the van belonged apparently there to work one of the street lights. The streetlight in question, with a ladder leaning against it and orange construction cones marking off a crude semicircle about it, appeared to be partially disassembled.

 

Doubtlessly, that was the work of the electrician that stood in front of the ladder with crossed arms and eyes closed in mild irritation.  The electrician, a good head taller than Okazaki but with a slightly more slender build, wore a helmet that mostly hid a short mop of unruly gunmetal hair.  The electrician's face seemed vaguely familiar to Okazaki somehow, and he paused for a moment to consider where he had seen it before.

 

"Look at this dent," the man barked at Okazaki as he pointed at the aforementioned depression in the car's hood.  Okazaki gave the damaged hood a cursory glance as the man continued.  "A construction tool fell and things turned out like this.  Will you be my witness?"

 

"Hm," Okazaki grunted neutrally as he leaned over the hood to examine it in greater detail.  It didn't look like a tool had fallen on the hood to him.

 

He had become something of a connoisseur of impacts in his time, having seen everything from fists on flesh to the titanic clash when a large ship's prow slammed its way through an Oceanside building facade.  He'd seen this kind of impression many times before.  Something soft, indicated by the lack of scratched away paint, but also somewhat heavy judging by the depth of the dent, perhaps 20-30 kilograms at a guess depending on where it had fallen from.  He looked at the concrete wall behind the streetlamp.

 

The only oddity was the shape of the dent itself; the slightly oblong depression not consistent with that of any animal that might have jumped down on top of it.  Or at least not of any of normal weight; perhaps a particularly rotund example might fit, though.

 

"It is despicable of you to drag an unrelated person into this," stated the electrician with an even voice despite of the accusation in his words.

 

The car's apparent owner growled in response.  "Without a witness, you'd run away, wouldn't you?" he retorted angrily, the sneer on his face seemingly equally at home there as had been the merely irritated expression.

 

"Like I've said multiple times, I didn't drop any tools," replied the electrician calmly, looking up at Okazaki and the car owner.

 

Violet eyes, their steely gaze piercing into the car's owner, suddenly brought to mind where exactly Okazaki had seen the man.

 

There had been a commercial on as he had walked by a display several years back, and the man's face had featured prominently in it.  The man had held a guitar then, playing with intense exuberance.  He had at the time purposefully sped his pace; walking past the display before he could figure out exactly what was being advertised though in an effort to spite whatever advertising agency had produced it.

 

He had in his previous life hated advertisements, and time had not changed that any; old habits die hard after all, particularly when one feels no need to change them.  However, it would have sated his curiosity now if he had lingered a few seconds longer then.

 

"And if I had, I wouldn't deny it," the former musician turned electrician continued.

 

"How can I trust that?" the car owner asked angrily as he balled his fists up and took a step toward the electrician.

 

Okazaki regarded the man with a raised eyebrow.  The man didn't have the posture of a trained fighter, but some things were instinctual when a person prepared to fight.  To him, the man looked like if given half a reason he might decide that taking a swing at the electrician might be a good idea.

 

"If you're telling me to pay the repair fee, then I will," the electrician practically sighed out, drawing a foot back ever so slightly.

 

"So you admit you did it?!" the car owner accused, pointing his finger at the electrician for added emphasis, taking another step forward challengingly.

 

"No, I want you to reflect on this one day and think if what the electrician that day said was true or false," the electrician in question said, reaching up to clasp the helmet as if it were some totem giving him strength to utter some holy writ, "At a place where you feel most restful..."  His tone of voice changed, from calm to somewhat impassioned, eyes wide as he stared down the car's owner, "Next to the person you find most dear!"

 

Okazaki sighed.  ‘ _Showmen.’_

 

The car's owner no longer looked like he wanted a fight, the aggression displayed just shortly before suddenly replaced with confusion.  He turned to Okazaki and pointed a finger at the electrician, as if the man in question had transformed from a man and into a jelly filled doughnut and he wanted to make sure he wasn't the only one that had seen the improbable metamorphosis.

 

"What is he saying?" the car owner asked Okazaki plaintively, the confused expression he wore unfitting for his face.

 

Okazaki shrugged.

 

"People's lives are repetitions of actions hurting each other," the electrician stated, voice calm once more.  "It's understandable to doubt others.  But being unable to trust anything is the same as being unable to sense other people's love."  Again, abruptly, the electrician went back to his impassioned voice, dropping his arms and taking a step forward with a challenge of his own.  "Aren't you, perhaps, feeling lonely?  Aren't you, perhaps, living slavishly?  Are you able to laugh with an honest heart?!?"

 

"Wow," Okazaki couldn't help but say, shaking his head.  ‘ _And with a straight face, too; I'm not sure I could do that.’_

 

"Um," the car's owner, appearing very out of sorts, shuffled his feet with his hands behind his back and a look of complete disjointedness on his face as he looked up to the heavens as though they could grant some reprieve from the electrician's uncouth words.  "...I think so...?"

 

"I see," said the electrician, voice calm once more, crossing his arms, and turning to the side with a small smirk.  "Please keep living so that love doesn't go away."

 

The car's owner looked as if he had swallowed something sour as he regarded the electrician with a combination of annoyance and confusion.  However, the man's silence in the aftermath of the electrician's poetic assault made it clear that whatever head of steam he had built up previously was gone, diffused by the former musician's lyrical attack.

 

"Anyway," Okazaki interjected finally.  "That dent was caused by no tool."

 

"Huh?" replied the car owner intelligently, still some measure of stunned as he turned to regard Okazaki with raised eyebrows.

 

"Look at the dent," Okazaki noted, motioning him over to the hood of the car.  "There are no paint chips flaked off.  A tool, which has hard edges, would have scraped off paint when it fell.  This dent doesn't have any paint chipped away at all."

 

"Oh, you're right," noted the car's owner, peering down at the dent as if seeing it for the first time.

 

"Mm," Okazaki grunted.  "This has more in common with a soft object impact.  Like, say, a basketball.  It's a bit deep for that, though..."  He paused and glanced closer at the dent, noticing something he hadn't seen before in his relatively cursory examination.

 

Four smaller indentations roughly equidistant from each other just below the edge of the main dent, as though made by the paws of some animal.  A closer look indicated that the paws likely belonged to a cat, one of unusual girth judging by the main indentation.

 

"Ah.  A cat jumped off the wall onto it.  Look," he motioned with his hand to the smaller indentations.  "Paw indentations."

 

"...Ah," the car owner stated simply as he looked over the damage himself.  His face took on the resigned expression of someone whom knows that he has lost an argument, another expression which didn't seem to fit the man's face.

 

It was at this moment that a large black cat pulled itself from under the car and meowed lazily at the three men.  Okazaki walked over to it and with hands uncaring of the paws the cat batted at him with, picked it up and placed it on the damaged hood gently.  The cat fit in the dent as like a hand in a glove, removing all doubt as to the cause of the damage.

 

"Ung," the car owner groaned out, the sensation of being utterly wrong apparently not agreeing with his constitution.

 

\----0----

 

"Thank you," the electrician said to Okazaki with a serene smile a few moments after the car’s owner drove off, burning rubber as he accelerated away.  "You saved me."

 

Okazaki, in a rare mood for the day, was half tempted to say _'Just doing my job, ma'am'_ in a western accent.  It was perhaps fortunate that the accent didn't affect well into Japanese.  Not only would it probably be lost on the man, but there was rarely a time when calling a man "ma'am" didn't offend the man on some level.  He reflected that being offensive to someone that had just thanked you for something just wasn't in good taste and so refrained.

 

"Just calling things as I see them," he opined instead.

 

"I'd like to give proper thanks," the electrician affirmed, and reached into a breast pocket to pull out a business card.  He handed it to Okazaki with nary a flourish, which was vaguely surprising to Okazaki after his earlier display.  "Give me a call when you have time."

 

Okazaki took the card and made note of the name displayed.  A quick mental internet search banished his earlier curiosity.  ‘ _Odd place to find a retired musician,’_ he reflected.  ‘ _Or maybe not that odd, thinking on it.’_

 

\----0----

 

After leaving the electrician, he spent much of the rest of the day at Sunohara's, as he had planned to do in the first place.  Classes were out for the day, after all.  As usual, Misae's cat was also there, enjoying getting its ears scratched as Okazaki related the story to Sunohara.

 

"So yeah, and then he gave me a business card.  Here."  He pulled out the former musician's business card and handed it to Sunohara.

 

"Huh?"  Sunohara took the card and looked at it.  Then he blinked, and looked at it again with an aghast expression.  "This is...!"

 

"Yeah.  I knew I'd seen the face, but it didn't click until I saw the name."

 

"The legendary MC!" Sunohara exclaimed, as if the card held the secret of life, the universe, and everything.  Okazaki raised an eyebrow at his friend's reaction.  "He is _the_ Yoshino Yusuke!"

 

"That he is," Okazaki said, amused by the degree to which Sunohara had become star struck.

 

"The retired musician," Sunohara continued, half to himself.  "He had CDs out and was pretty popular."

 

"I only ever saw him on TV," Okazaki shrugged.  "...In a commercial.  One day.  A few years ago."

 

"Wow," Sunohara exclaimed.  "You have good memory."

 

"Thank you," Okazaki replied with only a hint of pride.  It hadn't always been that way; he used to have impressively bad memory in fact.  As he had aged it had improved somewhat, but never to the point where he could call his memory 'good'.

 

However, being able to interface his brain directly with a hard drive made remembering events, even momentary events such as a glance at a row of televisions, even over the span of years, return with crystal clarity.  He found it fortunate that drive space had continued to expand the way it had; nine years of memory took up huge amounts of space.

 

Sunohara shifted around in his seat to mess with his ancient stereo.

 

"He had gone missing," Sunohara stated reverently, "but who knew he was around here?"  He turned to smirk at Okazaki.  "I have _'The Best Of'_ my little sister made for me.  Listen to it," he said, producing a cassette.

 

"You have a little sister?"

 

"Yeah," Sunohara stated with mild surprise.  "I never told you?"

 

"Nope," Okazaki said.  Sunohara inserted the cassette into his player and started it.  The quality wasn't great, likely from the age of the system, but the music wasn't bad.  He found his toe tapping to the beat.  ‘ _Interesting...’_

 

\----0----

 

"You know," Sunohara said, sometime later, "it's not right.  No girl can be that strong."

 

"Careful there," Okazaki said wryly.  "Your inner misogynist is shining through."

 

"I'm serious, Okazaki!  What if..."  Sunohara leaned in conspiratorially.  "What if Sakagami Tomoyo...  Is actually a guy?"

 

"...She's not a guy," Okazaki said with a sigh.

 

"How do you know?" Sunohara grinned at him.  "You seen her naked?"

 

"I've not seen her naked," Okazaki said, another sigh escaping him.  "Just tell me how exactly she would hide being a guy?"

 

"With fake breasts!" Sunohara exclaimed.  Okazaki facepalmed.  "He's cross-dressing and deceiving the world!"

 

"Oh boy," Okazaki sighed warily.

 

"Exactly!  Just you wait," Sunohara declared.  "Tomorrow, I'll prove to you that he's a guy."

 

"Well it'll certainly be interesting to see how badly she pulps you for it," Okazaki admitted with a smirk.

 

"Er..." Sunohara said, the thought having apparently not occurred to him.  However, he brushed it off almost as soon as he had it.  "...Maybe he'll be too embarrassed to do anything once I reveal him to be a fraud!"

 

"...Mmm."  Okazaki couldn't think of anything to say to that, and wasn't sure he wanted to in either event.  He had to admit, watching Sunohara like this was usually hilarious.  Best to let nature take its course.

 

\----0----

 

He left Sunohara's dorm at curfew and began his nightly meanderings.  It was a nice city, really.  And walking its streets like this, knowing its time was limited...  It made him wonder if he was a masochist.  He shook his head and looked around.

 

He'd turned off his GPS for a moment and let his legs take him whichever way, an exercise in spontaneity for him, but one that he judged may have been somewhat ineffective as he had found himself in familiar surroundings not far from Furukawa bakery.  Or perhaps it was coincidence he decided, opting to pay the bread store a quick visit since he was in the area.

 

He walked in the direction of the bakery, rounding a corner and coming into what he had to admit was a rather dramatic scene.  Furukawa Nagisa stood nearly directly under a street lamp, its glow bathing her and the area around her in a surreal glow.  She looked at him for a moment from this vantage point, and began to speak, right arm out almost as if pleading, left arm across her chest in an almost hopeful gesture.

 

"If you wish," she began softly, "would you like me to take you?"  She clasped her hands together and closed her eyes.  Her hair was picked up in an updraft, only enhancing the mystical aura she was putting off.  "To a place in this city where wishes come true."

 

Okazaki blinked.  Then he blinked again.

 

Furukawa opened her eyes and regarded him with a smile.  "What are you doing here?"

 

"...Heh," he said as he rubbed his chin.  "Becoming rather impressed.  I admit I had my misgivings about helping reform the theater club, but after seeing that...  I have to admit, you have a gift for it."

 

"Thank you," she said as she looked down and blushed softly.

 

"No problem," he said, giving her the thumbs up.  "So, what's that from?"

 

"A play I want to perform when the theater club reforms," she said, quirking her head slightly.

 

"Oh?"

 

"Yes.  I always practice here.  Since you were here, I had you watch my performance."

 

"And quite a performance it was," he smirked, then scratched the side of his head in thought.  "We'll have to find a way to replicate that updraft on stage though.  Gave you a real mystical aura."

 

"You think so?" She tilted her head and looked at him quizzically.

 

"Indeed I do.  Hm, maybe a small fan..."

 

"Well you would know best," she said with a smile.

 

"You think so?"

 

"Well yes, you're the president aren't you?"

 

"Huh?  Of what?"

 

"Of the new theater club."

 

"Ah!  I thought that was your job!"

 

"But you would make a better president than I would," she looked down at the ground.

 

"On the contrary," Okazaki said.  "It's your wish that set it in motion.  All I have done is helped you to see it through."

 

Furukawa was quiet for a few moments after he said that.  "...Then I will do my best," she said, the hint of a determined expression on her face.

 

He smirked and gave her a thumbs up.  "That is all you can do.  Now then, I think I had best be on my way.  Keep up the good practice, yes?"

 

"I will," she said with a smile.

 

"Then I bid you farewell," he said in English, his dramatic bow quickly becoming a habit of its own.

 

"Goodnight," she said with a smile and a tilt of the head.  And with that, he headed home.

 

\----0----

 

School began the next day much as Okazaki had expected, with Sunohara dragging him along to seek out Tomoyo again.  He’d come prepared this time however, opting to indulge in a small bit of prop humor to go with Sunohara’s inevitably thrashing.

 

"What now?" a clearly exasperated Tomoyo asked a smug looking Sunohara as Okazaki stood to the side, munching a comedically small red and white striped bag of popcorn he had brought with him.  Tomoyo gave the amused Okazaki an annoyed glance, as if irritated that he wasn't even hiding that he was getting entertainment from the situation.

 

"I didn't come for a fight today," Sunohara said with an exuberant expression.  "I just wanted to chat a little."

 

"He means he's completely off his gourd," Okazaki said.

 

"Stop helping me," Sunohara hissed through a smile.

 

Okazaki stuffed a kernel of popcorn in his mouth.

 

"I overslept this morning, so I was totally shocked," Sunohara continued as if Okazaki hadn't said anything, scratching the back of his head sheepishly and winking amicably at Tomoyo.

 

"Your character's changed," observed Tomoyo, whom looked vaguely confused.

 

"And when I tried to shave," Sunohara rubbed at his face a little, "I noticed the razor was chipped, so it really hurt."

 

"I see," Tomoyo stated, regarding him with suspicion.

 

"So if you don't mind," Sunohara said, vaguely hopefully, "can I borrow your razor?"

 

"Why do I have to lend one to you?" Tomoyo asked with a measure of irritation.

 

"Hey!"  Sunohara exalted, leaping for joy.  "He fell for it!"  He half turned to Okazaki.  "You heard it, too, right?"

 

"Hrm," grunted Okazaki noncommittally as he munched on another kernel of popcorn.

 

"What's all this about?" Tomoyo directed at Okazaki, apparently hoping for an answer for Sunohara's antics.

 

"You just said, 'Why do I have to lend one to you?’ right?"  Sunohara said, pointing a smug finger at Tomoyo.  "In other words, you own a razor!  Which means-"

 

"I don't own one," Tomoyo interrupted.

 

"Huh?" Sunohara blinked.

 

"When I said 'why', I meant, 'Why do I have a reason to lend you my personal possessions?'" Tomoyo stated with just an edge of ice.  "First of all..."

 

"First of all?" Sunohara took the bait.

 

"It's rude to ask such a thing of a lady!" Tomoyo exclaimed as she unleashed a fury of kicks at Sunohara, whom found himself yet again airborne thanks to Tomoyo's deadly feet.  She finally kicked him past Okazaki and his popcorn, where he landed with a thud.

 

"You're going to kill me!" Sunohara exclaimed from the heap he had landed in, demonstrating a rather high tolerance for pain.

 

"Bye," Tomoyo said, walking away from the scene.  Okazaki plucked the last kernel of popcorn from the popcorn bag, folded it up, and put it in his pocket.

 

"Well that went predictably," Okazaki said after Tomoyo disappeared from earshot.

 

"Oww," Sunohara replied.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki helped Sunohara to class shortly afterward.

 

He didn't skip classes this time, opting instead to catch up on what he had missed.  If he had known it would be so little however, he would have went and made sure Kotomi was doing alright instead.  Sunohara, whom had fallen asleep in his seat shortly after lunch, ended up sleeping past the end of classes.  He wasn't surprised, this hardly being the first time that had happened.

 

"Oi, wake up," Okazaki said, giving Sunohara a stiff shake by the shoulders.

 

"Ah-h-h-h-h," Sunohara exclaimed.

 

"It's almost time for classes."

 

"What?"

 

"Yeah, you slept there all night, it looks like."

 

"Ack!  And I have classes again?  Noooo!"

 

"Nah, I'm just messing with you."

 

"...You're mean, Okazaki."

 

"Sometimes," Okazaki admitted with a smirk, turning to look out the window.  "Hm?"

 

Something caught his eye and he focused on it, then blinked.  A baby boar, with stubby legs and brown stripes running across its back, pressed its enormous nose against the ground occasionally, as if sniffing for something.  Its ears tilted frantically as well, in a surprising display of alertness for such a creature.  It disappeared back into the foliage as he watched.  ‘ _Now that's something you don't see every day,’_ he thought.

 

"Hey Sunohara, why don't you go on ahead?  I'll catch up."

 

"You sure?" Sunohara looked out the window but saw only the freshly mown lawn, the boar nosing around in the bushes rather than out in plain sight.

 

"I am," Okazaki said.  He'd check out the boar, and then make sure all was well with the nascent theater club.

 

\----0----

 

"Puhi!  Puhi!"  The baby boar was rubbing itself against his leg as if it were a cat.  Okazaki had to smile.

 

"Aww..." he said, reaching down to scratch it behind the ears.  It rolled over for a belly rub.  Okazaki grinned.

 

"Hey!" an exceptionally angry sounding Kyou called out.

 

Instinct made him duck down, a thrown book grazing the back of his uniform.  He turned his head in the direction of the book in time to note Kyou's shoe, looming far too large in his vision.  ‘ _Ah,’_ he thought, as it made contact, one of the few times she had managed to land a solid kick on Okazaki.  He stumbled back from the force of the flying kick.  ‘ _She has a hard kick.’_

 

An ordinary person would have been sent flying by the force of the blow; however, nearly 320 kilograms of artificial muscle and metal were not easily moved, and Kyou landed slightly awkwardly in front of Okazaki.  She stood, favoring her right foot slightly.

 

"What are you doing to my baby?" she hissed.  "And what are you made of, anyway?"  She reached down to rub her ankle for a moment.

 

"One, I was petting it.  That's your pet?"

 

"That's right," she said, slightly placated.  "A urinko.  A baby boar.  You hear people call them Uribou, too."

 

"It's cute," he said, picking it up and looking at it in the face.  It regarded him in return with strangely intelligent eyes.  He grinned at it.

 

"Puhi!"  It squirmed delightedly.  He handed it off to Kyou, whom held it protectively.

 

"Her name's Botan," she said.  "It's a really pretty name, isn't it?"

 

"Mmm," he grunted noncommittally.  "...Anyway!"  He ran off toward the theater club building doing a fair imitation of Zoidberg's scuttling from Futurama, complete with his signature "woop woop woop woop woop."

 

"H-Hey!" exclaimed Kyou as she gave halfhearted chase to Okazaki, only to find he had disappeared around the corner of the building.  "...Where did he go?" she asked the thin air in front of her.

 

If she had looked upward, she would have seen Okazaki waving from the rooftop.  320 kilograms of artificial muscle and metal may not be easily moved by mere muscle and bone, but they could move themselves with surprising speed and grace; even making clambering up the side of a building seem an exercise in triviality.  He shook his head with a smirk and turned to drop in on the theater club.

 

\----0----

 

As Okazaki entered the theater clubroom, he realized he had walked in on a lecture in progress.

 

"-which means that the more massive that a star is, the shorter its life will be," Kotomi said, pointing at an illustration from one of her books as she held it out in front of her.

 

He blinked, realizing for a moment that between her explanation and the gesture itself, Kotomi could be considered rather cute.  He dismissed the sensation as she continued.

 

"...That is one reason why large stars are not as common as smaller, dimmer stars."

 

The focus of her lecture, Furukawa, looked as though she had passed the point of mere confusion long ago, Kotomi's words flowing over her like a river over a drowning person's frantic clawing for air.  Okazaki shook his head as Kotomi took notice of him.

 

"...Tomoya kun, hello," Kotomi greeted him with a smile.

 

"Oh," exclaimed Furukawa, a relieved smile on her face.  "Okazaki san, hello!"

 

"Ladies," he greeted.  "...What's going on here?"

 

"Oh, I asked what the books Kotomi chan had brought along with her were about," Furukawa said.

 

Kotomi nodded, apparently delighted to share her knowledge with Furukawa.  "...I had astrophysics texts this time.  Do you want me to read them to you?"

 

He glanced at Furukawa, whom though making no overt signs that she didn't want Kotomi to continue, was unable to hide a certain tremble at the thought of such an ongoing lecture.

 

"...Maybe another time," he said.  Kotomi looked down slightly at that, even as Furukawa's shoulders sagged slightly in relief.  "...It's just that there's not much time before they close up the building and kick us out."

 

"Oh?" Furukawa looked over at the wall clock.  "Ah, it's later than I thought."

 

"...Oh," Kotomi lamented.  She closed the book in her hands and placed it in her book bag.

 

"...Well I enjoyed listening to your lecture," Furukawa lied, even managing to smile as she said it.

 

"...Shall I continue tomorrow?" Kotomi asked.

 

Furukawa gasped a little.

 

"Ah, do you have any books on acting or theater?" he asked.

 

"...There are some in the library," Kotomi said.

 

"Those might be more appropriate for next time," he said.  "This is the theater club, after all."

 

Furukawa nodded, taking Okazaki's lead.

 

"...Yes," Kotomi said in agreement.

 

They left the clubroom shortly afterward.  Okazaki and Kotomi parted with Furukawa at the school gates and walked silently to the point where they had separated last time.  Again they said their goodbyes and parted ways some distance from Kotomi's house.  He could have followed.  His curiosity made him want to.  But he respected her wishes and didn't.  Instead he meandered, returning home only late at night to help Naoyuki into bed and get some rest himself.


	6. Making Friends and Influencing People, Part 2

Okazaki sighed as the past day’s pattern repeated itself; go to class, follow Sunohara to Tomoyo’s class, and irritate the girl in question.  _‘If it wasn’t so funny...’_ he thought.

 

"You're really persistent," Tomoyo said with a dejected look as Sunohara smiled at her.

 

"He is," Okazaki said as he leaned against a wall just behind Sunohara.

 

"I'm only here to meet you today," Sunohara said as he waved his arms disarmingly, "since you're so cute."

 

"I can't trust those words at all," she said.

 

Okazaki nodded in agreement.

 

"CRAP!" exclaimed Sunohara with an impressive amount of energy as he waved his arms around frantically.  "I left my breasts at home, and I need them for my next class!!"

 

Okazaki managed to trip himself despite standing still and landed on his face.

 

"Tomoyo, lend me your breasts!" Sunohara continued unabashed.

 

"Why?" Tomoyo asked as she covered the appendages in question with her arms protectively.

 

"All right, he fell for it!" Sunohara exclaimed.

 

Okazaki propped himself up slightly to rest his head in his hand, and regarded Sunohara from behind with a twitch of an eyebrow.

 

Sunohara turned to him.  "You heard it-"  Sunohara blinked and looked down at Okazaki.  "...What are you doing on the floor?"

 

"Oh nothing.  This spot just seemed comfortable."

 

"...But you heard him, right?" Sunohara continued, unfazed.

 

"Her?"

 

"No, him, and I just proved it!" Sunohara exclaimed happily.  "To answer 'why' means he can lend them."  He pointed his finger at Tomoyo.  "In other words, Tomoyo's breasts are detachable!"

 

"Of course they're not," she replied calmly, to Sunohara’s dismay.  "First of all..."

 

"Here we go again," Okazaki said quietly as he pressed himself back against the floor to avoid being hit by the soon to be airborne Sunohara.

 

"Eh?" Sunohara said flatly.  "First of all?"

 

Bait:  Taken.

 

She was on Sunohara in the blink of an eye, a flurry of kicks holding him in midair.

 

Okazaki sighed.

 

"What kind of class makes use of breasts?!" exclaimed an irate Tomoyo as she sent Sunohara flying down the hall with one last kick.

 

\----0----

 

"His guard is tighter than I'd thought," Sunohara said a bit later with a sigh as he walked down the steps toward the student lounge on the third floor, bandages covering his head in places.

 

"Her," Okazaki corrected from Sunohara’s side.

 

"I'll get him next time!" Sunohara exclaimed as they stepped into the lounge proper.  Okazaki sighed.  Sunohara was beginning to take things too far; it was probably a good idea to think about stopping him before someone really got hurt.

 

"Oh," Fuko, coming up from the stairs from the second floor said, pointing at Okazaki, "I found the wrong person!"

 

"As opposed to the right person?" Okazaki noted wryly as he stopped to regard the somewhat unruly girl.  "How unlucky."

 

"Huh?" she said in confusion, then shook her head before going up to Okazaki and Sunohara.  "...Here," she said, and pushed one of her wooden starfish into Okazaki's hands.

 

He noted it wasn't the same one she had been carving before; the pattern of the wood grain was different.

 

"Hmm?" Okazaki took the starfish gingerly.

 

"Who is this kid?" Sunohara asked, bending down to look at her.  "Someone you know?"

 

"Ah!" she squawked, taking a couple steps back.  "It's a weird person!"

 

"Huh?" exclaimed Sunohara with irritation as he stepped forward toward her challengingly with an annoyed expression.  "What's weird about me?"

 

She took another step back.  "Your hair color is so unnatural!" she exclaimed, and pointed at Sunohara's head with a shaky finger.

 

Sunohara blinked and stepped back to regard her, more wary and less annoyed.  "...She's really rude even to someone she's just met for the first time."

 

"But you have to admit she's right," Okazaki replied with a smirk.

 

"Not you too?!" Sunohara spun to face Okazaki with a shriek, looking betrayed.

 

"Sorry my friend, but it's true," Okazaki said with a disarming grin as he splayed his arms out in a shrug.  "I'd been thinking that for a while, to be honest."

 

"Why didn't you say anything?!" gasped Sunohara.

 

"I figured to each their own," Okazaki said with another shrug.

 

Sunohara wilted, tears in his eyes as he began to slink away.

 

Okazaki watched him go pityingly.  "...Maybe I shouldn't have said anything..."

 

"...So, wrong person," Fuko began.

 

"Okazaki," he corrected.  "Okazaki Tomoya."

 

"Then, Okazaki san," she said, with a measure of condescension.  "Do you not have something to say to me?"

 

"Ah," he said as he looked briefly at the starfish in his hands, "Thank you."

 

"...My older sister will be getting married soon," she said after a few moments.  "Her partner is named Yusuke san.  Will you celebrate with me?"

 

"What, like a party?"

 

"No," she shook her head.  "I mean go to the wedding!"

 

He raised an eyebrow.  "...Isn't it a bit of an odd thing to ask for someone you practically just met?"

 

"Is it?"

 

"A bit.  Who is your sister, anyway?"

 

"She was an art teacher here at this school until three years ago.  I want the students to celebrate her marriage, so that's why I'm distributing the presents."

 

Okazaki began searching the internet for art teachers at Hikarizaka High School from three years back.  "Huh."  He paused to rub his chin.  "...So how many students do you plan to accost in this fashion?"

 

"All of them."

 

"All of them?"

 

"Yes," Fuko said.  "If they receive something this cute, I'm sure they'll all be touched."  She paused for a second, pulling out another starfish carving from one of her pockets.  "Something so cute..."  She took on a beatific smile as she clutched the starfish to her.

 

"...And there she goes again," observed Okazaki with a sigh.  He reached out and shook her slightly.

 

"Huh?"

 

"You left the world for a moment."

 

"I did?" she blinked, genuinely confused.  "Where did I go?"

 

"You..."  He shook his head exasperatedly.  "Never mind."  He rubbed his chin again as she stared at him blinking.

 

He blinked in return when he realized that the only art teacher from three years ago had a sister that was apparently still in the hospital in a coma from a car accident.  "...Say, what did you say your family name was?"

 

"I didn't.  Why do you want to know?  Are you a stalker?"

 

"Just trying to figure out which teacher your sister was."

 

"...Ibuki," she admitted after thinking about it.

 

He pinched the bridge of his nose.  "...Which would make your sister Ibuko Kouko."

 

She nodded.  "You know her?"

 

"...Not directly," Okazaki admitted as he thought of how to ask his next question.  "...Fuko, were you ever in a car accident or anything like that?"

 

"...Ah!" Fuko exclaimed, eyes wide.  "The wrong one is a stalker!"  She turned and ran.

 

Okazaki stared after her thoughtfully.

 

\----0----

 

It was a bit later when Sunohara dragged Okazaki out to find Tomoyo again.  Okazaki sighed.  _'Twice in one day now?  Hoo boy...'_

 

"I'm actually pretty busy, you know?" said Tomoyo with a resigned frown.

 

"Mmm," grunted Okazaki as he regarded a smugly smirking Sunohara.

 

"This time around, I'm a little different from the other times," Sunohara said.

 

"You always say something similar," she said.

 

"I'm really different this time!!!" Sunohara exclaimed as he ran toward Tomoyo with hands out as if to grab her.  The kick to the face was realistically inevitable, though Okazaki noted that Sunohara was launched a further distance than normal, in spite of having his flight ended early by a section of wall jutting out to protect a vent inside.  He slid down it.

 

"Are you alright?" she exclaimed worriedly as she ran up to him.  "I instinctively kicked you with all my might."

 

"Heh," Sunohara said as he sat up and rubbed his chin.  "You've got a pretty good kick.  He stood up and grinned.  "Hey, come with me for a moment alright?"

 

"What for?" she asked with suspicion as she let Sunohara lead her.

 

"After a fight, we need to make up," Sunohara explained glibly, leading her into the men's restroom.

 

Okazaki sighed.  There was a loud thud, then a screech as Sunohara was sent flying out the window and into a tree.

 

Tomoyo stormed out of the restroom, an offended and embarrassed glare on her face.  "What do you guys hope to accomplish by dragging me into the men's bathroom!?" she snarled at Okazaki, lacking Sunohara to pummel again.  "There are limits to harassment!" she exclaimed angrily before storming off.

 

"He thinks you're a guy," he said with a shrug.

 

"Huh?"  She stopped in her steps.

 

"Yeah," he said.  "He can't accept that a girl is as strong as you are."

 

She turned to look at him, eyes wide with a mixture of surprise and sadness.

 

He blinked.  "...Didn't you notice?"  He'd thought it had been abundantly obvious himself.

 

"...No...  I'm shocked," she admitted as she looked down with sad eyes.  "I was thinking I was acting like a normal girl at this school."

 

"To be fair," he noted slyly, "normal girls don't go around kicking the crap out of people.  At least not around here."

 

She looked at him then back down again with a sigh.  "I am working to change myself, but...," she said dejectedly before turning to walk away.

 

"Hey, don't sweat it," he said.  "If it's what you do, it's what you do.  Don't worry about it."

 

"If it were just that, it would still be a problem," she replied as she turned back around to face him.  "But I'm also running for student council president."

 

"Hm.  And being seen as a violent person could be a liability."

 

"That's right."

 

"I see," Okazaki said, nodding.  "I'll see what I can do about Sunohara.  He's really gone too far with this in all honesty."

 

"I would be grateful for that," she said with a small smile.

 

"I suppose you wouldn't have any time for joining the theater club then," he lamented, an idea already struck down just as he'd had it.

 

"I'll admit that sounds interesting, but with the elections coming up, I don't think it would be possible," Tomoyo said thoughtfully as she cradled her chin in hand.

 

"A pity."

 

She nodded.  "Go ask someone else," she said not unkindly as she walked away.

 

He watched her go before looking at the window Sunohara had been ejected from.  "...Better go make sure he's alright," he said to himself with a sigh.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki sat with Sunohara later during lunch, after having made sure Tomoyo hadn't killed him.  Sunohara was letting Okazaki in on his latest plan.

 

"Sex appeal," Okazaki said with a snort.

 

"I accept that Tomoyo's a girl," Sunohara said.  "Then all I have to do is attack with the right approach."

 

"And that would be?" Okazaki asked somewhat flatly.

 

"I'm going to try to appeal to her feminine side," Sunohara said with a smirk.  "Try to get on her good side."

 

"I'd say you have your work cut out for you then.  So far you've done little to impress her."

 

"That's why I'll need your help."

 

"Sunohara..." Okazaki began, and turned to look at Sunohara with a serious, furrowed brow.  "Why don't you just leave well enough alone?  What good is going to come of doing things like this?"

 

"Well..." Sunohara said, before looking down thoughtfully.

 

"Besides, I'm not sure I like where this is going.  I have standards, and helping you woo her just to go and attack her or something afterward goes against them.  If you're going to try to get on her good side, then make sure you actually mean it.  Don't just use her like that."

 

"...You're right," Sunohara said with a dejected frown that rapidly changed to an arrogantly determined smirk.

 

Okazaki blinked.

 

"...I guess I'll just have to go straight for her then!"  Sunohara skipped back toward the building.

 

"Suno-," Okazaki began, but he had already disappeared from sight.  He was a bit surprised; he didn't think Sunohara could move that fast.  It was a pity really, Okazaki reflected later as he saw Sunohara nursing a few more bruises.

 

\----0----

 

When classes ended, Okazaki decided to ask the Fujibayashi twins about joining the theater club.

 

"Hey," Okazaki said as he walked in front of the aforementioned twins, catching them as they walked toward the school gates.

 

"Huh?" Kyou blinked and looked at Okazaki with suspicion.  "What do you want?"

 

Fujibayashi, from her position slightly behind Kyou, regarded Okazaki with confusion.

 

"I don't suppose either of you would be interested in joining the theater club, would you?"

 

The two sisters looked at each other.  Kyou shrugged.

 

\----0----

 

"Well you already have enough of members," Kyou said from the chair she had claimed, having decided to at least take a look at the clubroom.  She was flanked by her mousier twin sister and Furukawa.  "Now you just need an advisor."

 

Okazaki sat on the ground resting his arms on one of his knees in front of Kyou.  Kotomi was absent; according to Furukawa, she had to study for a test.  Okazaki wondered which test it could be, because as far as he knew there were no tests due for at least a couple weeks.  He mentally shrugged.

 

"Be that as it may," Okazaki said, "I had hoped you two would join as well.  Makes for a stronger case, you understand."  Plus it might help Kotomi, whom needed the friends he suspected.  He'd have rather had Tomoyo here instead though; Kyou had harsh edges and Fujibayashi was just as introverted as Furukawa, if not more so.  Tomoyo sat in the middle ground personality wise from what he could tell, kicks of doom notwithstanding.  "In either event, I'd say Koumura is our best bet.  He's not playing advisor to any other clubs."

 

"You'll have to ask him tomorrow though," Kyou said.  "He's already left for the day."

 

"I know," Okazaki observed with a shrug.  "C'est la vie."

 

They each went their own ways shortly afterward, the Fujibayashi twins going to their separate rides home while Okazaki accompanied Furukawa most of the way on her trip home.  They then said their goodbyes and went to their separate homes.  Okazaki helped Naoyuki into a proper bed before heading out to meander for a while, stopping to deal with a couple of thugs before returning home for the night.

 

It just wasn't the same, he lamented.  He had to hold back so much just to make sure he didn't accidentally cripple or kill someone, but at the same time he couldn't stop altogether.  He chided himself though; it was in its own way a punishment of circumstance, and he accepted it.  With that in mind, he returned home to sleep.

 

-0-0-0-0-0-

**A note from the author:**

I know, I know, I can hear you saying it already.  “Wait a second.  It’s 2037.  Why does Sunohara still have a cassette player?”  It’s a fair question.  In 2020, a combination of two factors gave rise to the newest incarnation of the cassette tape player.  The first was the unexpected death of the CEO of a rather successful stereo manufacturer.  The other was his son, who was more than a bit new to the business and certain that his idea of creating a new cassette tape player will work given how well records sold, which were even older medium than cassettes, had his dream produced amidst a media blitz.

 

Thousands of units were produced, millions of cassette tapes were made, and the stock price of the company plummeted.  The young CEO had, in his visions of dollar bills, ignored the sage advice of his advisors whom made note that while records had indeed sold well, it was to musical purists whom preferred the old style qualities of vinyl.  In 2022, the new CEO was quietly sacked by the shareholders and the large number of still unsold stereo units and tapes sold first at low price, then practically given away in auctions.

 

Sunohara’s father, something of a music buff himself and more than a little eccentric, purchased a few of the units as well as a large number of tapes in one such auction on the reasoning that after enough time, they might become collectors’ items and consequently worth a considerable amount of money.  Unfortunately on his way back, his truck was hit by someone running the light.  One of the boxes containing one of the stereos was dented, along with many of the cassette tape cases getting good and cracked, lowering the potential collector’s value considerably.  Sunohara Sr, not one to waste an opportunity, opted to set up the stereo and see how it sounded.

 

The stereo became something of a conversation piece in the Sunohara household.  Sunohara Sr eventually became all too sick of hearing about it, and for that matter hearing the kids playing it at all hours, entertained by the novelty of old style technology.  A solution to the continued annoyance presented itself in the form of Sunohara Youhei’s enrollment in a private high school.  Sunohara Sr. was quick to gift his son with the player and sent it, along with the tapes the kids had made.  Sunohara Mei, less than happy about the situation, opened and set up one of the other stereo units, much to Sunohara Sr.’s consternation.  However, the damage being done and resignation setting in, Sunohara Sr. let the situation go and, every now and again, Mei sent Youhei a mix tape of music she heard on the radio portion of the stereo.

 

And that’s why Sunohara has a cassette stereo.  Totally not the author accidentally leaving in a placeholder when he posted the story and deciding to go with it.  Totally not that at all.


	7. The Butterfly Effect, Part 1

A figure, invisible despite the light shining in from the hallway, stepped into the hospital room of Ibuki Fuko.  It marveled at the girl in the bed as it closed the door, doubt driven from its mind in that instant.  It had arrived earlier in the day at the behest of the rest of its mind, and had spent a good portion of the day near the records section pressing itself to the ceiling and waiting for someone to open the door in the busy afternoon, not wanting to draw attention to itself with a door that opened on its own.  Someone eventually had and it fell in behind them, entering the room quickly while the door was open.

 

It had immediately begun looking for records on the girl, but had been unable to thoroughly peruse them until the person that had opened the door for it had left.  Once it found the records, it had to wait again for someone else to open the door.  By that time someone did it was nearly evening, and it opted to wait until the quiet of the night shift to perform its duty.  It read the file it had taken as it waited.  There had been the possibility that it wouldn't be able to do what it needed to do; it depended on the type of injury.

 

It was with good reason that the girl had spent three years in a coma; even the most skilled neurosurgeon would not be able to heal her injuries.  Simply, to acquire the level of skill and knowledge required to heal her outright necessitated lifetimes of personal experience, not to mention knowledge that could only be gleaned from experimentation on living humans with similar injuries.

 

The overmind that controlled it had several lifetimes of personal experience.  It had, for lack of a better word, _eaten_ the experience from several highly skilled neurosurgeons.  The overmind that controlled it had experimented on living humans with similar injuries.

 

Or at least close enough, the overmind itself being an adequate substitute; and it had no qualms about experimenting on its injured elements nor just poking itself in the brain to see what made it tick.  It knew what to do and how to do it.  All it needed was the right equipment.

 

It disabled the optical camouflage to reveal a brown haired man with hazel eyes, nondescript features, and an average height and build.  He was clad in what could have been a military uniform for an urban assault squad; indeed that had been part of his original function before he had been diverted to this task.  Assault, and...  Retrieval.

 

What mattered was that he did, in fact, have the right equipment on hand.  The equipment in question exploded out, making his fingers appear to almost double in size as scalpels, forceps, mechanical tendrils and injection needles of various sizes extended out from each fingertip.

 

Equipment that, in the right hands, could tear a person's mind into chunks to be stored and cataloged for use at a later date, would now be used to bring someone out of a coma.

 

He knew what was wrong.  He had the tools he needed.  He had the knowledge he required.  Rather than recovering in 'years, if ever', she would recover in days thanks to his interference.  So he performed the surgery, undistracted as the overmind pondered what it had seen in this room and wondered what the coming days would hold.

 

\----0----

 

"Please have one," Fuko said to a brown haired male student as Okazaki passed by on the other side of the hall.  "It's a present.  If you would..."  He looked over at her, and the student whom was waving off her attempts to give him one of her starfish.

 

Okazaki's head suddenly burst into pain, causing him stumble for a second in surprise before he clamped down on it.  He looked away from her to massage his temples but found, to his surprise, that the headache had suddenly departed.  He blinked and looked back at her again.  Pain.  He looked away.  Pain gone.

 

 _'What the flipping flying fuck?'_ he asked himself in confusion.  This, in all his experiences, had never happened before.  He commanded his nanites to observe what was happening in his brain, and dared look back at her.

 

Fuko blinked and looked in his direction before gasping, pointing, and yelling, "It's the stalker!"

 

"I'm not a stalker," Okazaki said with a sigh, ignoring the pain in his head as he regarded her tiredly.

 

"Then how'd you know about the accident?"

 

"I know many things," he said.  The report he got back from his nanites was extremely confusing.  Neurons weren't making connections properly, and there were signs of connections having broken in areas governing short term memory.

 

Were he to guess, the only reason he could remember why she was there or that she was there at all was because of his networking node and the nanites, each interfacing with his brain in ways that skipped the traditional memorization processes in favor of more efficient, harder to inhibit ways.

 

She tilted her head in confusion and he looked away from her.  Relief, and a return to proper mental function.  _'Odd, so it's only happening when I look at Fuko?'_

 

"But..." she started, then looked around.  "Aaaah!" she yelped, and ran to hide herself behind Okazaki.

 

He could see her huddle behind him fearfully through the camera imbedded in the back of his head, and cut the visual feed from it to stave off the pain threatening to engulf his brain.

 

"...What are you doing?"  Okazaki asked flatly as he looked around to see three male students, one with short cropped green hair and eyes, a taller one with blond slightly longer hair and gray eyes hidden by glasses, and a somewhat chubby one with mauve hair and purple eyes.  They appeared to be looking around excitedly in search of something or someone; given Fuko's reaction, he suspected he knew the aim of their search.

 

"There are weird people after me," she explained with a note of distress, confirming his suspicions.

 

"So you hide behind the one you call a stalker?" Okazaki asked as he did his best to look natural.

 

"Desperate times call for desperate measures," Fuko said as the green haired boy pointed toward Okazaki excitedly, drawing the attention of the other two boys to Okazaki's location.  They formed up on Okazaki with surprising speed.

 

"Fuuuuuko chaaaan!" they cried as one to the figure behind Okazaki's back as he raised an eyebrow.  They took notice that there was someone between them and her and focused on Okazaki instead.

 

"Are you Fuko chan's friend?" the green haired boy asked.

 

Okazaki recognized him as one of the boys that had been spreading rumors of a ghost girl earlier; rumors which apparently had more than just a grain of truth to them as Fuko's existence attested to.  They had gotten a minor detail wrong though, he reflected.  She wasn’t a ghost, just an _ikiryo_ ; the manifestation of a soul of a living person separate from the body.

 

"No, he's Fuko's stalker," she said from behind his back.

 

"Not a stalker," Okazaki amended tiredly.

 

"We want to form a Fuko chan fan club," the green haired boy explained.

 

"Or her private guards, if you will," said the blond haired boy with glasses.

 

"We were touched by Fuko chan's act of indiscriminately giving out sculptures she makes," the green haired boy said, clasping his hands together reverently.

 

"So we want to help her make her sister's wedding a fancy one," the red haired boy added.

 

"Creepy," Okazaki said.  "And she calls me the stalker."  The nascent fan club blinked as one in the face of his statement.

 

"Fuko doesn't need you!"

 

The Fuko fans seemed to wilt at the statement.

 

"Still, we'll do our best!" exclaimed the green haired boy after shaking himself out of it.

 

"We didn't expect you to say yes right away," the brown haired boy said.

 

"We'll work hard so that Fuko san will trust us one day," the blond haired boy declared.

 

"Since we fell in love with Fuko chan," the green haired boy said with a beatific smile.

 

"Fuko chan, and big brother.  Excuse us," said the brown haired boy.  They bowed as one and fled, having said their piece.

 

"...Well," Okazaki said.

 

"Weird people," Fuko opined with a nod.  "Better than wrong person."  She nodded again.

 

"...Go away, Fuko," he said with a sigh as he pinched the bridge of his nose, the mental pain accompanying her presence getting the better of him.

 

"...Fuko thinks Fuko will not be here for much longer anyway," she said as she glared at him for a moment.

 

He turned to regard her with half lidded eyes.

 

She looked down at the ground dejectedly.  "Fuko can't explain it."

 

"Maybe Fuko is getting better from her coma?" he remarked, raising an eyebrow.

 

Fuko's eyes widened at this declaration and she looked at Okazaki for a moment before she resumed staring at the ground, seeming lost and confused.  "...You know," she said.

 

"As I said, I know many things," he said with a sigh.  "I must say I was surprised to see you though.  The real you, that is."

 

Her head snapped up and she stared at him, mouth open in surprise.  "...And you can still see Fuko?" she gasped in wonderment.  "Fuko doesn't think...  that's supposed to happen."

 

"I..."  He paused and rubbed his chin.

 

It didn't really explain what was happening, how it was happening, or even really why it was happening, but that statement, taken with a burst of what he could only call 'anti-memorization' when he looked at her...  Still didn't make sense, but he latched onto it nonetheless; it was the only grain of an explanation he had for what was going on in his brain.

 

"Huh.  You know, I wonder if you're not right about that," he said at last.

 

Fuko appeared to be in deep thought, chin rested on her hand as she looked down.  "But how?" she asked no one in particular.

 

"As you have noted," Okazaki began, face set in a slightly sad expression, "I'm wrong.  I go against the grain of this world.  Fuko."  He leaned against the wall thoughtfully.  "You noticed something about me that I'd rather not explain so, for the moment, I won't.  However, I will say this."  He lowered his voice.  "I have some...  Augments.  Machines in my head that help me to see things better.  To hear them better.  To remember them better.  I don't know for sure, but...  I think they're all that's letting us talk, right now."

 

"...Fuko is still confused," she whined.

 

"So am I," he admitted.

 

\----0----

 

"Oh, so you want to restart the theater club?" asked the well past his prime Koumura Toshio, language teacher and advisor, as he sipped from a cup of tea after classes had finished.

 

"That's right," Okazaki said to the nearly white haired mustached man sitting in a blue chair opposite Furukawa, whom was seated on the far end of a blue sofa facing Koumura's chair.  Kotomi sat between the two.  Furukawa and Kotomi sat straight with tea cups in front of them.

 

Okazaki stretched back languidly in the seat, tea cup in hand and feet propped up on the table.  It would have been a startling lack of decorum; but Koumura was the type to not particularly care about such things, the easy going teacher long an acquaintance of Okazaki's and apparently used to his lack of traditional manners.

 

Okazaki had to admit, the man was clever under that easygoing facade.  He'd introduced Okazaki and Sunohara by arranging for them to pass one another after both of them had been in separate fights.  Apparently his appearance had amused Sunohara, which in turn had amused him.  They ended up laughing, Okazaki still hadn't decided if it was together or at each other, and had been friends ever since.

 

Okazaki suspected this was done mostly for Sunohara's benefit though.  He couldn't be sure, but he had a hunch sometimes that Koumura felt that though there was something that Okazaki needed, but was out of Koumura's power to grant.  Sunohara's problems were easier to sort out at the time; he just needed a friend to keep him in line.  Okazaki liked to think that he helped there, at least a little.

 

"I believe we have sufficient numbers," Okazaki continued, "and we might have a couple more besides soon.  All that's left is finding an advisor."  He looked pointedly at Koumura with a small smile.

 

"Could you please be our advisor?" Furukawa gushed.

 

Koumura grunted, mulling it over.  "I'll give it some thought," he said at last.

 

"Thank you very much," Furukawa, Kotomi, and Okazaki said as one.

 

Okazaki raised his cup to Koumura and took a drink.

 

\----0----

 

The day ended without further note, passing to the next day the spoils of actions taken.  For Okazaki, the day had started out mostly as any other, the exception being that the Founders Festival was to take place and that had meant that his plans for the day were to read manga at Sunohara's.  However, Sunohara surprised him by saying he wanted to go to the festival; Okazaki had tagged along with a measure of amused curiosity.

 

And so he found himself standing in an aisle, feeling slightly out of sorts as he watched the students file past from one exhibition to another.  He understood why Sunohara had wanted to go; he wanted to hit on girls from other schools.  Okazaki shook his head.  Irritating.

 

He looked on as Sunohara watched a girl with hazel eyes and red hair tied in pigtails go by with a somewhat hawkish gleam in his eyes.  Okazaki shook his head as he watched him chase after her.

 

"Hey, hey!" Sunohara exclaimed.  "You there!  Do you want a tour?"

 

"I really don't need one," the girl replied with only a touch of ice, "thanks."

 

"Oh come on," said Sunohara as he came around in front of the girl.  In so doing, he missed the fact that someone in a bear costume was moving from behind a corner at an intersection with an open window to block his way.  "Which school did you come from?"

 

Okazaki sighed when the inevitable happened, and Sunohara collided with the person in the bear getup.

 

"Watch where you're going!" Sunohara almost shouted as he raised a fist up in a challenge before pausing to note how the person was dressed.  Recovering quickly, he tried to motion them out of the way, saying "Move it!  Or else she'll get away!"

 

Okazaki started walking in that direction before a fight broke out.  He started moving quicker when the bear shook its head 'no.'

 

"If you won't move, I'll move you," Sunohara declared.

 

Okazaki paused.  There was something about the posture of the person in the bear suit, some tenseness, which seemed familiar to his fighting sense.  He'd seen it before.  He slowed down, no longer particularly worried.

 

"You have no clue who you're facing," Sunohara declared.

 

 _‘Nor do you_ ,’ Okazaki mentally noted as he walked slowly to them.

 

"Get lost!" Sunohara exclaimed, sending a straight punch at the figure, whom ducked to its right and unleashed a roundhouse kick powerful enough to send Sunohara out the open window and into the waiting arms of a tree.

 

"Huh," Okazaki said, coming into the same position Sunohara had occupied moments before.  "I thought the stance looked familiar.  Tomoyo?"  The bear in question pulled the head of the costume off to reveal the unamused looking girl in question.  "Heh."

 

"That's right," Tomoyo said as she put the bear head under her arm and regarded him with a vaguely annoyed expression.

 

"I must apologize," he said.  "I tried to stop Sunohara's behavior last time...  Well, time before last, if you count this time."

 

"He called me out and attacked me," she said, irritated.

 

"And got some more bruises for his efforts, I saw," he noted with a smirk.  "At least you weren't subjected to his latest plan."

 

"Which was?"

 

"He was going to try to flirt with you, I think."

 

"...I'm most grateful, in that case."

 

"Don't mention it.  So what brings you here, anyway?"

 

"I'm working as a volunteer on patrol.  I'm keeping my eyes open for those who deviate from code in the midst of this bonanza."

 

"Fun.  And the bear outfit is standard issue for that?"

 

"I'm a famous figure among a certain group of people," Tomoyo admitted, looking askance with a slightly sad smile.  "There might be people who'd pick a fight with me if they see my face."

 

"Ah, the associated punks and hoodlums," Okazaki reflected.

 

Tomoyo nodded.

 

"Pity it doesn't seem to stop some people from picking fights with you in spite of not seeing your face," he said as he looked out the window at Sunohara, whom was struggling with the tree limbs as if it were a deadly serpent.

 

Tomoyo sighed. 

 

He shook his head.  "That's a good point though, maybe I should-"

 

"Okazaki!" exclaimed someone from the corridor Tomoyo had appeared from earlier.  Okazaki and Tomoyo looked in the direction of the call to see Furukawa, smiling as big a smile as Okazaki had ever seen her smile.

 

"Furukawa, what's up?" he asked.

 

"I have some great news," Furukawa said, almost giddy.  "I...  Don't know who else to share it with here, but I thought you might like to know."

 

"Well what's up?" he asked again.

 

"One of my teachers," Furukawa began, "One from when I was a freshman comes around to the bread store often, and she has a sister that is in a coma."

 

"Go on?" he asked, though he suspected he knew the news already.

 

"Well that's just it, she's not in a coma anymore," Furukawa practically squealed, confirming his suspicions.  "I'm so happy for her!"

 

"That's great news indeed," he said with a smile.

 

"She's not able to get up and walk or anything yet," Furukawa continued, "but she's awake despite the doctors thinking it might be years before she recovered, if ever.  It's a miracle, don't you think?"

 

"It certainly is," he only half lied.

 

"She only stopped by the bread store before she went to see her in the hospital," Furukawa said.  "Apparently she only woke up this morning."

 

He nodded with a serene smile.

 

"Anyway, I just wanted to tell you.  I'm so happy about it!" she continued.

 

"I'm glad for you," he said.

 

"So am I," Tomoyo added.

 

Furukawa blinked and turned to the girl in the bear suit.  "Oh, I'm sorry," she said.  "I didn't mean to interrupt."

 

"Not at all," he waved it off.  "Sakagami, Furukawa.  Furukawa, Sakagami."

 

"It's nice to meet you," Furukawa said.

 

"It's nice to meet you too," Tomoyo replied.  "I'm afraid I have to go now though, I'm on patrol.  We should meet later."

 

"Un," agreed Furukawa with a smile.

 

Tomoyo put the bear costume head back on and went back to her patrols.

 

"I'm afraid I must be going too," Okazaki observed.

 

With Sunohara probably out for the rest of the occasion, he just wasn't feeling the desire to stay and possibly ruin the event with a fight, though he was halfway tempted.  He would have to go see about harassing some of the local lowlifes later.

 

He was surprised to learn that Fuko had made such a speedy recovery though; he figured another day would have been needed. It did explain why he hadn't seen her around though.

 

"But thank you for sharing the good news,” he said.  “It's always nice to hear about stuff like that."

 

"Isn't it?" Furukawa asked, beaming

 

"Just so.  Well, later."  He began to walk off, waving behind him.

 

"See you later," Furukawa replied before heading her own way.

 

\----0----

 

And so the day ended.  Okazaki meandered around the town for a while, picking a couple fights with some of the local thugs before heading to Sunohara's dorm.  Sunohara, only a little worse for wear in spite of being kicked out of a window, grudgingly let Okazaki in to read his manga.  Okazaki stayed until nearly midnight before returning home to resettle Naoyuki and get some rest himself.

 

The next day passed in much the same manner.  There were no classes, and as such Okazaki spent the day rereading old manga again at Sunohara's, before retiring to his house once more.  He couldn't shake the feeling, however, that somehow some fate had been derailed; that there was something that should have happened that didn't.  He didn't dwell on it much however; somehow, he felt that perhaps what had happened was for the best in that regard.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki arrived late the following day.  He would have come earlier, but once again in an act of defiance against punctuality he read a few chapters of Alan Dean Foster's "The Spoils Of War."  He'd read it before of course, but it was part of one of his favorite series of books.  He could have read it in his head.  Instead, he read it out of a book.

 

By the time he finished and made his way to the school, it was almost time for second period.  He could have gone in and stayed in class for the rest of the day.  He decided to skip classes for the day instead.  There was nothing due and he figured that there were better places to be besides, so he made his way to the library.  He saw Kotomi in her home away from home as usual, and made his way over to her corner of the library.

 

"Kotomi chan," he greeted.

 

"...Huh?" the girl in question blinked, as if shaken out of a trance and turned to Okazaki with a growing smile.  "Tomoya kun!  Hello!"

 

"Greetings," he said.  "Do you mind if I sit and read with you?"

 

"...Not at all," she replied with a smile.  He sat down and pulled the book he had been reading out of his book bag and flipped it open to where he had left off.

 

"Kotomi chan," he said after a moment, "have you ever read _'The Damned'_ trilogy by Alan Dean Foster?"

 

"...Yes."

 

"Hm," Okazaki thought about this as he closed the book bag, sealing within the first book of the series in question.  "What did you think of it?"

 

"...It was good," Kotomi said.

 

"How about the Foundation series?"

 

"...It was good."

 

"Ringworld series?"

 

"...It was good."

 

"WorldWar series."

 

"...It was good."

 

"...I'm seeing a trend here."

 

"...I like all books equally," she admitted.

 

"...Hm.  Laudable, but..." He contemplated this for a moment.  "...Don't you have any preferences?"

 

"...Science fiction."

 

"A broad preference."

 

"...Golden age science fiction."

 

"Still pretty broad."

 

"...With time travel."

 

"Narrow it down another level?"

 

"...With romance."

 

"What's your favorite one?  Series, book or story, it doesn't matter."

 

"...The Dandelion Girl, by Robert F. Young."

 

"I should have guessed," Okazaki said with a smirk, then a frown as he thought on it further.  "...You quoted it earlier, when we...  Met."

 

She glanced aside, sadness touching her eyes.  "...Yes."

 

"Hmm...”  He thought for a few seconds.  "...I'm guessing you read it to me, or had me read it on a regular basis?"

 

"...Read it to you," she confirmed.

 

He nodded.  "...I wish I remembered more," he admitted.

 

She looked down at the floor.

 

He sighed.  ‘ _Time for a different tact.’_   "So!"  He practically boomed, the unintentional effect of startling Kotomi noticed and lamented.  He continued on quieter.  "What do you think of the theater club?"

 

"...Nagisa chan is nice," Kotomi said with a small smile.

 

"So you've noted," Okazaki said.

 

"...Yup."

 

"...I guess you can't really say much beyond that though.  We haven't actually, well, _done_ anything."  He paused to think about that fact.  "...I really should talk to Furukawa about that.  I know she has a play in mind..."  He scratched his chin thoughtfully.

 

"...She's still writing the script," she said.

 

"Hm, can't be helped then," he said, then shrugged.  "Anyway, shall we read?"

 

Kotomi nodded with a happy expression before looking down at her book.

 

He smiled amusedly while shaking his head, and went to his own book.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki was only somewhat surprised to find both of the Fujibayashi twins present in the club room when he returned to it after his reading session, Kotomi in tow.  Fujibayashi Ryou smiled gently at the pair, as did Furukawa.  Kyou, on the other hand, glared slightly.  Kotomi noticed this, and hid herself behind Okazaki.  He could feel her tremble behind him.  ‘ _Oh, that's right...’_ he thought.  ‘ _They haven't actually met yet.’_

 

"...Will she bully me?" she asked, wide eyed. Tugging on his sleeve, she pleaded for an answer. "Will she bully me?"

 

He sighed.  "No.  Probably."

 

"Hey!" Kyou cried out indignantly.

 

"Look," he stepped to the side and regarded Kotomi.  "Introduce yourself to them, hm?  They're nice people."

 

"...Um," Kotomi began, and then pointed at herself with a worried expression.  "Kotomi.  You spell Kotomi with three hiragana."  She let her hand drop.  "When you speak to me, call me Kotomi chan."

 

"Huh?" Kyou looked at Kotomi with an alternatively confused and annoyed raised eyebrow.

 

The expression frightened Kotomi, whom promptly hid behind him once more.

 

"Is she a bully?" Kotomi asked again.

 

"No," he reassured gently.

 

Kotomi peaked out from behind him at the two sisters.

 

"Um, hello," the younger Fujibayashi said.  "My name's Ryou, with one kanji.  Um, you can call me anything you like."

 

Kyou sighed.  "...My name's Kyou, with one kanji.  I suppose I don't mind what you call me either."

 

"So I can call you muttonchops?" he asked with a smirk on his face.

 

Kyou response was to kick him in the face.

 

"Ow,” he said.

 

"Okazaki san!" Furukawa exclaimed.

 

"Heh," he said.  "I'm fine.  Nice jab by the way."

 

"Don't know what you said," Kyou said, "but it can't be nice.  Mutonchiopasu?"  She struggled with the foreign word.

 

"It's English," he clarified.  "Refers to a style of beard."

 

Kyou's foot again met his face.

 

"Ow."

 

Kyou rolled her foot again after kicking him in the face.  "Seriously Tomoya," she asked with a grimace, "what are you made of anyway?"

 

"Obviously, I'm made out of awesome," Okazaki said, letting the question roll over him while he rubbed the sides of his nose as if to make sure it wasn't broken.

 

"...Hmph," Kyou snorted and turned her head aside.

 

"Anyway, moving right along," he said, "Kotomi here...  Has difficulties making friends.  So I'd like to ask you two to at least try to be her friend."

 

"Isn't there something strange in becoming friends because you're asked?" Kyou said with a vaguely annoyed raised eyebrow.  "Friends aren't given; you're supposed to make them."

 

"That's why I'm asking you just to try," he replied.  "It's not easy for her."

 

"Tch," Kyou said before she stepped around the two and left the room.

 

He watched her go with a raised eyebrow.  He hadn't quite expected her to react like that.

 

"Um, okay," the younger Fujibayashi began timidly after she watched her sister leave, "if you don't mind, may I read your fortune?"

 

He thought back to his first encounter with Fujibayashi's fortune telling before shrugging and looking at Kotomi.  "It's your call," he said finally with a shrug.

 

Kotomi walked forward to Fujibayashi, who was fanning out her deck of cards.

 

"Go ahead," Fujibayashi said.

 

Kotomi turned to him.  "Will she bully me?"

 

"Not intentionally," Okazaki replied.

 

Fujibayashi blinked.

 

"Ah, I meant no offense,” he said, “it's just that, your predictions can have some edge to them.  From what I've seen."

 

Still, Fujibayashi looked down at the ground with sad eyes.

 

"Look, forget I said anything, alright?"  He waved his arms in front of him disarmingly.

 

Fujibayashi considered his words for a moment and nodded slightly.  "Um...," She went on, still holding the cards out.  "Please pick any three cards you like."

 

"...Oh," Kotomi murmured, examining the cards before drawing three from the fan.

 

Fujibayashi folded the deck back and put it in her pocket before holding her hand out.  "May I see them, please?

 

Kotomi placed the three drawn cards in her hands.

 

Fujibayashi examined the cards carefully, then frowned.  "...I don't think you can make friends."

 

He sighed.  "...As I said.  Your predictions have edge."

 

Kotomi’s eyes were wide with hurt, and held tears threatening to fall.

 

"...I see what you mean," Fujibayashi replied and looked down.

 

Kotomi turned around and started to make her way out of the club room.

 

Okazaki put a hand on her shoulder to prevent her from going.  "Just for the record," he said to Kotomi before he tilted his head toward Fujibayashi, "and I mean no offense to you Fujibayashi, which is a fact that bears repeating..."  He focused back on Kotomi.  "But when she took my fortune, it didn't pan out either."

 

"It didn't?" Fujibayashi asked.

 

"Well, no," he said as he turned back to regard Fujibayashi.  "You said I'd meet a kind girl, lose track of time, and be late for class.  As you may remember, I wasn't late for class that day, implying I didn't lose track of time.  Whether or not Kyou is kind, well, that's up for debate, but I'll give the benefit of the doubt there."

 

"...M-My sister is kind," Fujibayashi stated and frowned at him.

 

He raised his eyebrow in return; it wasn't often that he saw her show anything resembling a spine.

 

"She's just forceful sometimes,” Fujibayashi continued.

 

"...Well, you have me there," he admitted.  It had been an unfair description, in retrospect.  He rubbed the back of his head uneasily.  "Eh, again, forget I said anything."  There was an uncomfortable silence for a few moments, prompting him to speak once again.  "Still, the prediction wasn't particularly accurate either way."

 

"Well, there are times when fortune telling fails," Fujibayashi said.  "Even if the reading comes out bad, the future should be changeable depending on the individual and the surroundings."

 

"In short," Okazaki said to Kotomi, "you're probably good on making more friends."

 

"Does it work like that?" Kotomi asked.

 

"Yes," Fujibayashi replied.  "Since I think you're a fun person, too."


	8. The Butterfly Effect, Part 2

"So, Furukawa," Okazaki began a little later, "I've been meaning to ask, how's your script coming along?"

 

"Well, I haven't gotten very far," Furukawa started, only to be interrupted by Kyou entering the club room and glomping the seated Kotomi.

 

"...Kyou, what are you doing?" he asked with a lowered, unimpressed eyebrow.

 

Kotomi blushed, obviously not used to the contact.

 

"See, I won't bully you," Kyou said with a smile not far removed from a smirk as she patted the girl's head.  "Good girl, good girl..."

 

"Creepy, Kyou," he said with half a smile.

 

"Ignoring you," Kyou replied, expression unchanged.

 

"So what happened to not making friends because of being asked?"

 

"That's why _I_ approached her," Kyou said as she stuck her tongue out at him.

 

"Fine.  But I think you're upsetting the poor girl," he remarked, pointing at Kotomi's embarrassed face.

 

Kyou frowned, then let go of Kotomi.  "Spoilsport," she stated, before sitting down with the rest of the group.

 

"Anyway."  He shook his head at Kyou's antics as he hid an amused smile.  "You were saying, Furukawa?"

 

"Eheh, yes," Furukawa said.  "Well..."

 

Someone started playing a violin in another room.

 

Kotomi stood up suddenly and turned around.

 

Furukawa blinked.  "Huh?"

 

"Eh?" was his intelligent reaction to Kotomi's unusual action.  Then he blinked.  There was that stab of familiarity again.  Kotomi...  And a violin?

 

An image of a young Kotomi playing a violin intruded into his mind.  His nanites began tracing the paths, trying to restore the damaged memories.  But it still wasn't enough.  Each time he thought he had traced a path to the damaged section of his brain, he found it blocked by more damage.  There had to be some key somewhere, something that would unlock the memories for him.  But he didn't know what it could be, and that frustrated him.

 

"Is something wrong, Kotomi chan?" Furukawa asked, concerned.

 

The girl in question walked out of the room with a haste Okazaki hadn't seen before.

 

The rest of the group got up and followed, with a mixture of concern, curiosity and in Okazaki's case irritation at his continued inability to fully remember what had happened so long ago.

 

\----0----

 

Kotomi led them to the music room.  The sound of a violin playing resounded louder there, the source obviously within.  She opened the door without hesitation and walked inside.

 

Okazaki blinked; it was uncharacteristically bold of her.  ‘ _I guess, with the right trigger...’_

 

He peeked inside, grasping the side of the door as he poked his head into the room.  There were three girls inside, each wearing the badge of second year students.

 

The tallest had red hair cropped to the shoulders and ruby eyes.  Her brow was furrowed with confusion and slight irritation, an expression that he had to note fit the girl like a glove.

 

The shortest girl, with hip length blue hair and sapphire eyes, was the apparent source of the music; the violin in her hands ceasing its soothing air as its player stayed her hands with a confused raised eyebrow.

 

The remaining girl, about halfway between her friends in height with close cropped green hair and emerald eyes, shared the same confused expression as the violin player.

 

"Um, is there something you need?" the blue haired girl questioned.

 

Okazaki looked at Kotomi with a raised eyebrow.

 

Kyou, Furukawa, and Fujibayashi filtered in quickly behind Kotomi.

 

"What's wrong?" Kyou asked.

 

"I'm sorry," said the blue haired girl holding the violin.  "Was it noisy?"

 

"No, it wasn't bothering us," Kyou said, putting up a placating hand and smiling.

 

"Kotomi chan, what's the matter?" Furukawa asked worriedly.

 

Kotomi was fixated, on the violin.  "...Violin," she spoke longingly.

 

"Huh?" the girl holding the violin blinked and looked at the instrument in question as realization dawned on her.  She held the instrument out.  "Would you like to play it?"

 

"...I can?" Kotomi asked.

 

"Sure," agreed the girl as she moved forward with the instrument in question.  Kotomi walked toward her.

 

"Kotomi, can you play the violin?" Kyou asked.

 

The two girls met halfway, and the girl with blue hair handed the violin to Kotomi.  Kotomi looked down at the instrument with a happy smile before placing the instrument under her chin and bringing the bow to it.

 

Okazaki knew how to play the violin.  One of the people whom he had ripped information from had played it as a hobby.  He didn't practice, but he knew what playing a violin looked and sounded like.  What Kotomi was doing right now looked like, but was definitely not, playing a violin.

 

The girl that had given Kotomi the violin collapsed onto her knees, the sound Kotomi was producing not meant to be heard by human ears.  Everyone, except Okazaki and Kotomi herself, had their hands over their ears.

 

He had heard louder, more terrible noises, and could filter the noise out besides; but how Kotomi herself was able to withstand it he could only guess.

 

"Kotomi!"  Kyou cried out with a combination of pain and mortification.  "Stop!  Stop!"

 

"You're putting too much strength into it!" lamented the girl that had given Kotomi the violin.

 

He sighed.  One thing was clear, and that was that as close to the violin as she was, there was no way that Kotomi could hear their cries for mercy.

 

A fluorescent light bulb burst overhead, sprinkling a corner of the room with glass shards.  The windows themselves caved in next, the piercing dirge carrying more than enough power to rattle them past the point of destruction.

 

Almost as soon as she had started, however, she stopped, causing all present, excluding Okazaki and Kotomi herself, to collapse to the floor in relief.

 

"...So nice," Kotomi breathed wistfully, to the amazement of her victims.

 

"Tomoya..." Kyou began, all her normal strength of voice sapped by the infernal melody, "What's wrong with her?"

 

"In this, I don't know," he admitted with a sigh.

 

\----0----

 

The day passed, giving way otherwise quietly to the next.  Okazaki found himself asleep in his classroom again, though during homeroom such behavior was tolerated.  Even while asleep though, he was some degree of alert; it could easily be said that he never truly slept.  As such, when Kotomi stepped up to his desk, he needed no prompting to rouse.

 

"Hm?  What are you doing here?" he asked gently, taking note of the violin in her hands.

 

Other students began to take notice of the unfamiliar girl in their midst and turned in that direction.

 

"...Tomoya kun," she began with a smile, before she brought the violin up to play with a smile and closed eyes.

 

"Koto-"

 

Kotomi pulled the bow over the strings.  The other students reeled in unison at her assailing elegy.

 

Okazaki grit his teeth.  He'd have to do something about this, and soon.  He didn't have any idea what that 'something' would be however.

 

Fortune took pity on the occupants of the classroom however, as Kotomi ceased playing almost as soon as she had started.

 

"...So nice," she said blissfully, apparently unaware of the damage she had wrought.

 

He sighed.  "Kotomi chan."

 

"...Hello, Tomoya kun."

 

"...What's with the violin?"

 

"...I saw you napping, and decided to play you a lullaby."

 

"...A lullaby," Okazaki confirmed blandly.

 

"Okazaki," one of his classmates intruded, hands still over his ears from Kotomi's sonic assault.  "Who is this?"

 

"A friend of yours?" asked another from behind him with an annoyed edge to his voice.

 

"That's right," Okazaki replied.

 

Kotomi blinked and looked around the classroom, letting the violin lower to a resting position as she took in the confused and gossiping students.  "...Kotomi," she said as she pointed to herself with her bow hand.  "You spell Kotomi with three hiragana."  She let her hand drop.  "When you speak to me, call me Kotomi chan."

 

Okazaki sighed.  It hadn't fully impressed itself upon him until now that it might be in her best interest to teach her a more formal introduction.

 

The students in the classroom only got louder at this, looking at one another in confusion.

 

"Kotomi chan," he began, only to be interrupted.

 

"Hey!  Kotomi!" exclaimed Kyou as she threw open the door to the classroom.  "What do you think you're doing?"

 

"Kotomi chan?" the younger Fujibayashi asked, peeking into the room as Kyou ran in.

 

"So it was Kotomi chan," Furukawa said, opposite of the younger sister.

 

"...Kyou chan, Ryou chan, Nagisa chan," Kotomi greeted them as they ran up to her.  "Hello to you all."

 

"Don't 'hello' me!" exclaimed Kyou.

 

"...Bonjour?" asked Kotomi.

 

Okazaki sighed.

 

"No!" yelled Kyou, exasperated.

 

"...Bo-n-jour?" Kotomi asked again, exaggerating the syllables to the degree that she had to move her head in varying ways with each one.

 

"Augh!" Kyou half screamed as she scratched her head frantically.  "Why can't I communicate with her?!?"

 

"Please calm down for now, Kyou chan!" Furukawa exclaimed, trying to calm the beyond frustrated Fujibayashi sister.

 

Okazaki sighed again.

 

Kyou began to collect herself, taking a few deep breaths before pointing an index finger at Kotomi.  "What are you doing here?" she asked, calmer than she had been.

 

"...Playing the violin," said Kotomi.

 

"That's the one that was in the music room wasn't it?" Kyou asked with a pained expression.

 

"...They lent it to me," Kotomi said.  "They said, 'if you like it that much, would you like to use it for a while?'"

 

Okazaki sighed yet again.

 

"Allow me to play the next piece," Kotomi began after a few seconds, causing the classroom to begin to panic.

 

Kyou tackled her before she could bring her weapon to bear.

 

\----0----

 

Class after that had been relatively silent, save for the rumor mill grinding away at Kotomi's visit to Okazaki's classroom.  He couldn't care less about rumors and hearsay however, and after class finished he threaded his way to the theater clubroom.

 

"...Oh, if it isn't Tomoya kun," Kotomi said in a tone that could be considered wry as he entered the room.

 

"...Yes, it is I, Tomoya kun, defender of..." he looked around, "...the chalkboard!" Okazaki declared in his hammiest voice as he saluted, causing Kotomi to blink at him.

 

"And that's why you need better timing," Kyou said as she walked to the door from her spot with an open box of props on a desk.  "Your gags don't have any momentum, and you say them with the wrong timing."

 

"What's this, training her to be a comedian?" he asked as he let the salute drop.

 

"Boke and Tsukkomi routine actually," Kyou said.

 

He started to observe that it hadn't sounded like any Boke and Tsukkomi routine he'd ever heard, but thought better of it and remained silent.

 

"Go to the corner and take practice swings," Kyou told Kotomi.

 

Kotomi nodded and complied.  "...What the heck?" she intoned, smacking the air in front of her.

 

Okazaki shook his head.  "...So what brought this on, exactly?"

 

Kyou shushed him.

 

"...What the heck?"  Smack.

 

"If you don't keep her occupied," Kyou whispered, "she'll start playing the violin again."

 

"...What the heck?"  Smack.

 

"Hello," The younger Fujibayashi greeted cordially as she entered the room.

 

"...Oh," Kotomi said wryly, turning around.  "If it isn't Ryou ch-"

 

"Oh," Furukawa said as she burst into the classroom, "You're here already."

 

"...Oh, if it isn't Nagisa ch-"

 

"See?"  Kyou declared.  "You don't have the timing down, so you can't say it all."

 

Okazaki sighed.  "So what were you doing before we popped in here," he asked, pointing with his head at the opened prop box, "besides a boke to tsukkomi transformation?"

 

"Oh that," Kyou said as Furukawa went over to the box with the younger Fujibayashi.  "Just seeing what you had on hand."

 

Kotomi made her way over to look at the box in question as well.

 

"Hm," he grunted and picked out a prop sword from the box as they peered at its contents.

 

"...I see lots of unique things," Kotomi said.

 

"It's the first time I've opened it, too," Furukawa admitted.

 

Kyou sat back, apparently content to watch the other girls and Okazaki played with the props.

 

"Is the recruiting of new members making any progress?" Fujibayashi Ryou asked as Okazaki took a few practice swings with the prop sword.

 

"Not yet, but I want to get enough members by the time the School Festival comes," Furukawa said.

 

"Is that when you plan to hold your play?" he asked as he jabbed at an invisible opponent with the prop sword.

 

"Un," she said as Kotomi produced a stereotypical 'magical girl wand' from the box of props.

 

"...Nagisa chan, what's this?" Kotomi asked.

 

"I think it's a magic wand," replied Furukawa.

 

"...Magic wand?"

 

"You say an incantation as you twirl it in the air," Fujibayashi said as she imitated such an action as much as her seated position would allow, "and then you transform with flying stars."

 

"...Humm?" Kotomi thought on this before standing.

 

Okazaki parried an invisible blow.

 

 _"...Tibi, magnum Innominandum,"_ Kotomi intoned.

 

He blinked and stopped in mid-slash and looked at Kotomi with a raised eyebrow.  He thought he recognized the work in question.

 

_"...Signa stellarum nigrarum.  Et bufaniformis Sadoquae sigillum!"_

 

"...Huh," He said halfway to himself.  Okazaki wasn't blind.  In spite of all his upgrades, all the circuitry that was buried within his brain, all the hormones normally present in the human brain were also present in Okazaki's; he didn't mess with them for the most part, only sparingly using a number of reaction boosting chemicals as appropriate.

 

He was a straight male in the end, even if he hid it well under a cloak of apathy.  He knew that the girls that he talked to would be considered cute by most men, and he wasn't blind to this.  He didn't think much of it most of the time as generally they didn't interest him in that way, their tastes too divergent or personalities just not interesting to him.

 

Further, and more potent as a reason why he didn't really look at any of the girls he knew in a romantic way, was an old oath he had sworn to himself and upheld for the years up to and including his attempt at world domination.

 

An oath to forswear himself from relationships; once used as an almost selfless act from a selfish person to protect others from an abrasive, passive-aggressive, overbearing personality.  Time had worn some of that away, everything he had seen and done humbling him and removing some of the harsher edges.  His oath now felt more like punishment to himself as much as protection of those he might have otherwise considered courting.

 

So when the sudden wash of attraction washed over him as he watched Kotomi recite lines from _De Vermis Mysteriis_ and looked at her in from a new light as a result, Okazaki found himself unprepared for their presence; unable to do anything for a few seconds but gape at Kotomi.

 

Kyou blinked and looked at him with a raised eyebrow, prodding the reincarnated sower of sorrows into action.  He swiped at the air with the prop sword halfheartedly, turning his head purposefully away from Kotomi.

 

"...Looks like nothing happened," said Fujibayashi.

 

"...Maybe I didn't enunciate it correctly," Kotomi contemplated.

 

"But you're amazing, Kotomi chan!" Furukawa said with a smile.  "I want to be able to recite lines smoothly like you, too."

 

Kotomi blushed at the praise.

 

Kyou got up and walked over to Okazaki.  "Hey," she said quietly.  "Is something wrong?"

 

He regarded her for a moment.  "...It's nothing."

 

"...I know I can be mean sometimes," Kyou went on, "but we're friends right?  Besides...," she leaned in conspiratorially with a smirk and whispered.  "...I saw the way you were looking at Kotomi-"

 

"You saw nothing," Okazaki responded in a harsh whisper.

 

Kyou looked vaguely hurt.  Then she looked pained, because Kotomi had unleashed the full fury of her shattering requiem, the violin resounding through the hallways.

 

"What the hell?" Kyou exclaimed as she turned around to face the three girls surrounding the prop box.

 

Okazaki sighed as he faced the girls in question as well.  _‘Saved by the violin,’_ he thought.

 

"The conversation drifted towards saying she's better with the violin than incantations," Furukawa said, hands over her ears.

 

"If you have to play it," Kyou barked, "play it somewhere else!  If the reputation of the theater club drops, you'll cause the president trouble!"

 

"Um," Furukawa began, "I'm fine."

 

"...I want a lot of people to hear it, after all," Kotomi said.  "...Plus, I have to return this violin to the music room eventually."  She hugged the violin with a wistful smile.  "So I want to play it as much as possible while I have the opportunity."

 

"Let's do something about it, big sister," Fujibayashi suggested plaintively.

 

"Let's see..." Kyou said with a sigh.  She thought for a moment.  "Okay!  Day after tomorrow, on Monday, we'll hold your violin recital."

 

Okazaki blinked at this pronouncement and looked over at Kyou with a raised eyebrow.

 

"...Recital?" Kotomi asked in confusion.

 

"We'll gather more people for you on that day," Kyou said confidently before giving a heated glare at Kotomi.  "So you're prohibited from playing the violin here until then," she growled out.

 

He found it within himself to sigh once again.  So much fuss over a violin.  Or rather, the sounds Kotomi managed to coax out of the violin.  It was sad, really.

 

"...Recital..." Kotomi breathed, lost in thought.  She nodded to herself with a blush.

 

Okazaki closed his eyes.

 

"...Okay.  I'll go practice then."  Kotomi turned and began walking from the room.

 

"May I accompany you?" Furukawa asked as she stood to follow her.

 

"I'll go, too," the younger Fujibayashi declared, also rising to go after them.

 

He started to walk after them, but Kyou clasped her hand on his shoulder and pulled him back.  He looked back at her with a mildly confused expression.

 

"I'll work out the details for the recital with him," Kyou said.

 

He regarded Kyou evenly.

 

"Okay," Fujibayashi said, as the trio looked at them, "then we'll go."

 

"...See you later, Tomoya kun, Kyou chan," Kotomi said.

 

Kyou waved them off.

 

He watched them go before turning to Kyou with a sigh.  "...So what do you want?"  He cut straight to the heart of the matter.

 

"...You like Kotomi, don't you?" Kyou was equally adept at sidestepping the normal formalities of such things.

 

"An interesting conclusion," Okazaki replied.  "What brings you to it?"

 

"Several things actually," she said.  "First, you've been seen in the library reading with her."

 

He had noted the occasional looks through the window at Kotomi and himself.  He supposed he wasn't surprised that had made its way back to Kyou; she tended to be surprisingly well informed about the goings on at the school.  "And?"

 

"Secondly, you brought her here."

 

"The club needed members, and she needed friends.  She doesn't have many.  And until I brought her here, I might have been her only friend.  Third?"

 

"You tried in all earnestness to make us her friends."

 

"As I said, she doesn't have many and isn't good at making them."

 

"And you did your best to give her some by bringing her here.  It's not something you would do for just anyone."

 

"I wouldn't say that," Okazaki began, then thought about it.  "...Perhaps not to that extent, no.  Anyway, fourth?"

 

"And fourth was that look you gave her just now," Kyou concluded.  "I've never seen you look at anyone else like that."  She regarded him with a bemused expression.  "...Seriously, I was beginning to think you liked guys or something."

 

He couldn't help but laugh a little at that.

 

Kyou continued.  "So you've been spending a lot of time with her, bringing her places with you, getting her friends, and frankly gawking at her.  It's pretty obvious that you like her."

 

"...Most of that is incidental.  And complicated."

 

"Complicated how?"

 

"Complicated in an 'I can't really tell you right now' sort of way."

 

"That's helpful," she said with a snort.

 

"That's the best I can do right now," Okazaki said, leaning against the wall.  "I'm sorry.  It's not in my hands."

 

"...Alright," Kyou relented and waved it off.  "Still doesn't explain that look you were giving her."

 

He sighed.  He couldn't lie to himself.  He knew on some level he did indeed like Kotomi, which for him was rather frustrating.  Usually he was able to avoid such things, as he had for years.  But Kotomi was interesting to him.

 

She had exquisite tastes in literature and was intelligent as hell.  In spite of that she had retained a sort of childlike innocence about her, far removed from his own jaded outlook, which he envied.  It evoked within him a desire to protect it at all costs.  Plus, and he found it annoying that it entered his mind at all, she was also pretty cute.

 

So yes, parts of him did indeed like Kotomi.  But he dared not act on it.  All he had seen and done...  Though she would inevitably find out, he knew that if she approached it from anything other than as a friend, it could well destroy her for all he knew.  It might destroy her anyway, but there wasn't anything he could do about that, aside from hoping that it wouldn't.

 

So yes, he might like her.  He wasn't going to deny that.  But he'd be damned if he did anything about it, besides try to kill the emotion.  He looked at Kyou cautiously.  She was just the type to try to set things up for a friend.  He'd have to word his replies carefully.

 

"...Fine," he said at last.  "Yes.  Fine.  I'll admit a part of me does like her."

 

She smirked triumphantly at this.

 

"A part," he emphasized.  "It's intelligence.  Alternative culture.  The ability to spout lines from _De Vermis Mysteriis_ like she did.  It hits a part of me," he thumped his chest, "right there."

 

"Hehemm," she said.  "So if I had started quoting heavy books you might have liked me?"  She grinned.

 

He regarded her with warily half lidded eyes, thinking back for a moment to around the time when they first met.

 

\----0----

 

_Okazaki and Sunohara had gotten in trouble for trying to sneak out of the window during class in his second year, with Kyou as their class representative.  The plan, concocted by Sunohara and amusedly followed by Okazaki, had failed spectacularly, whereupon they had been caught by the teacher and subject to both Kyou's wrath and putting up welcoming signs for the school._

_Okazaki had enjoyed himself doing it in truth.  Sunohara however, had kept looking for avenues of escape and ultimately halfway crushed himself under wooden boards during a failed attempt to leave.  They would have halfway crushed Kyou as well if Okazaki hadn't been there to hold up some of the falling boards._

_Afterward, Okazaki had opted to enjoy a nap later on that day during lunch, only to be caught by Kyou whom attempted to wake him up before he missed fifth period._

_Okazaki, of a mind to just skip class entirely, did his best to ignore her and pretend he was still asleep, but was surprised when she started talking to herself._

_"God," he remembered her saying, exasperated after her failed efforts to rouse him.  "...I guess he belongs to the cool looking side, now that I take a close look.  ...I wonder if he has a girlfriend."_

_It had been at that point that Okazaki had opened his eyes and regarded her with a sad frown, startling her almost into hitting him.  "I'm sorry," he had said, looking to the side.  "You should look elsewhere."_

_She had then, of course, hit him.  Repeatedly.  Indeed, she had done her best to beat the tar out of him afterward, deriding him for pretending to sleep while she had made such an embarrassing confession.  Still, though it had taken time, she had ultimately forgiven him for it and they became friends, after a fashion._

_She still liked to try and hit him any chance she got though.  He didn't mind that.  It kept him on his toes, and some of her attempts had been truly impressive besides._

 

\----0----

 

"...Not going to answer that," Okazaki answered.

 

Kyou thwapped him gently, apparently amused at his reaction.  "Fine, fine."

 

"Anyway, it's not something I intend to follow up on," he observed.  "And with good reason.  Kyou, you...  Don't really know me.  I've...  Done things I'm not proud of, things I can't atone for.  Things no one has the right to do, and I've done them."  He sighed.

 

"Jeez Tomoya, you make it sound like you've killed someone," she remarked warily, scooting away from him just slightly.

 

"Heh," he said.  "You wouldn't understand, I don't think.  You will find out though.  That can't be avoided.  When that time comes, I'll tell you about it...  I'll tell you, and Kotomi, and everyone about it.  We'll see what you say then."

 

"...You always did have a tendency for melodrama," she noted as she rolled her eyes.

 

He affected an expression halfway between a smirk and a grimace.

 

"Well whatever it is, we'll still be your friends," she said.

 

He shook his head.  "We'll see."

 

They went their separate ways after that.  Kyou headed for the bus while Okazaki made his way to the sound of a violin spitting rage at the heavens.  He listened for a time, out of sight, before heading off to his home to rest.  He didn't even perform his usual bout of meandering.  He didn't have the heart to fight after the day's events.

 

All he wanted was to go home and contemplate what had transpired.  He needed time to think; and time to squelch down emotions he knew someone like him shouldn't have.

 

He lay fully awake in bed for a long time, contemplating the day that had passed.  The thought that maybe if he had actually ever found someone then things might have turned out better, not just for him, but for the world; that if he had just forgone his oath to remain alone and sought out happiness, then maybe he wouldn't have done all that he had, that maybe so many wouldn't have died come as a surprise to him..

 

But old habits die hard, and in its own way his oath had also been an old habit.  He shook his head.  It was far too late for that in any event.  He just wished he could get Kotomi out of his head; such thoughts didn't help matters any.  He eventually fell asleep, but the night did not stop him from recriminating himself.

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A note from the author:**

Beware of rogue Kanon reference references.  Just sayin’.


	9. The Way of the Violin, Part 1

The early sun's rays filtered in from behind the clouds.  Its warm glow usually gave a certain comfort to the waking Okazaki.  Even when all else had turned to ash, it had risen on a new day as it had for eons.  Empires rose and fell, men lived and died, but the sun remained unchanged.

 

Of course, if he was feeling pessimistic, and he frequently did, he only ended up reminding himself that the sun would go nova and die in its own time, and the universe itself would grow cold and dark as the weight of trillions of eternities saw the end of life, matter, light, and even time itself from a certain standpoint.

 

But there was a certain cold comfort in that as well; no matter what you do, how badly you fail, how terrible your crimes...  In the end entropy would be the ultimate victor; all works, good or bad, wouldn't matter at all in the face of the universe's heat death.

 

He flipped the curtains open and looked out at the sky above the houses of the neighbors, wishing he could take in the day with a more optimistic viewpoint.  He had not slept well, thoughts running through his mind periodically bringing him to full wakefulness.  He forced them away and tried to face the day with the cheer he had been feeling more and more, even with the portends of impending doom drawing closer and closer.

 

Happy feelings did not return.  In their place, visions of the destroyed city began to plague him.  He remembered seeing his house, or what had been left of it, as he had passed into the city.  A surprisingly large section of it had withstood the pressure wave of the nuclear assault, and a part of him had opted to investigate the curiosity closer.

 

He remembered seeing the edge of his bed, the solid metal frame bent only slightly by the weight of the roofing timbers that had lain across it.  His desk was smashed open to reveal a labyrinth of conduits and piping, the only thing apparently keeping the desk's remains from having been scattered to the winds.

 

It had been as he had looked at the internals with intrigue that the desk's remains had attacked, some hidden defensive measure spitting a heavy shell that would not have been out of place coming from a tank's main gun at him at faster than the speed of sound.  There was no dodging it from that close, and even his enhanced reactions barely had time to register the incoming projectile before it hit him.

 

The impact did not kill him.

 

It had been when the shell, flattened against his torso, had exploded, ripping internal components loose and killing most of his biological parts with the shockwave that had done that.  It had been but one of thousands of deaths he had died that day.

 

He sighed.  At least he wasn't thinking about Kotomi.  He sighed again as he accidentally brought her to mind as well and crushed his thoughts down.  Time, he knew, would see the emotions fade.  Infatuation could be dealt with.  It took distance from the issue however, and in Kotomi's case he could not afford to distance himself either.  Not yet anyway.  In the meantime, all he could do was suppress the emotion as best he could.

 

He found Naoyuki asleep in front of the TV, using his own arm as a pillow.  He sighed and turned off the TV before he helped the man to his bed, shaking his head at the bottle of sake that had rolled out of his hand sometime during the night.

 

Naoyuki, he noticed, was completely out this time; picking him up and hefting him to his bed had done nothing to rouse him where normally he would at least wake enough to murmur something, even if incoherently.  Naoyuki was still breathing however, the regular rhythm of someone in a very deep sleep.  Seeing that he was safely ensconced in the bed, Okazaki returned to the room to leave the house when something on the floor caught his eye.

 

A hypodermic needle, the contents of which had already been used, lay under where Naoyuki had rested.  He picked the needle up and considered it.  Several conclusions jumped to mind, none of them pleasant.  He took the needle to his room and placed it on the desk.  He returned to Naoyuki with a needle of his own, and took a blood sample, and left that on the desk as well.  He sighed.

 

Some sort of illegal drug seemed most likely, and would in retrospect explain why Naoyuki was sometimes absent when Okazaki returned late at night.  He wondered briefly how long that had been going on.  Maybe it had just started.  Maybe Naoyuki had done this for a while and it was only coincidence that he hadn't caught it until now.

 

Or maybe he was just making assumptions and there was a logical explanation for it.  He wouldn't know until he did some tests.

 

Okazaki left the house.  He would find out soon enough.  Shortly after leaving, the portion of the desk he had left the needles on flipped over, dropping the needles down into the desk itself, and from there to parts known only by Okazaki.  Yes, he would know soon enough.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki dragged himself to Sunohara's, watching in his mind’s eye as the city died around him, the buildings he walked past smashed as though a giant hand had backhanded them with the might of a furious deity.  The remains had burnt too, a funeral dirge of smoke rising to the sky to lament their passing.  He stopped to consider a woman cleaning her laundry on the fence, moving on before she could notice his gaze.

 

Her house too had smoldered with the rest, its corpse feeding the black cloud that had cloaked the city like a shroud.  He wondered if the woman had survived the apocalyptic fury of the bomb.  He didn't know.  He never found out if anyone in the city at the time had actually lived through it; their fates were a mystery to him.  He held onto that mystery.  If he didn't know, then he could do his best to see that they did.

 

His thoughts were interrupted by a now familiar malefic coronach, Kotomi's violin resounding through the neighborhood streets putting any thoughts of visiting Sunohara out of his head.  Okazaki sighed.  ‘ _It would probably be wise to turn back_ ,’ he thought to himself, looking in the direction of the high school.  He shook his head.  It was way too late for that.  All he could do was see things through.  And so he walked to where he knew Kotomi waited, violin in hand.

 

The extra spring to his step did not go unnoticed to him however.  He sighed again and forced himself to walk normally.  It was going to be a long day.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki opened the door on Kotomi and took in the sight of her playing the violin.  Her face, in stark contrast to the perilous canticle emanating from the instrument in her hands, wore a serene, almost blissful smile.  He looked around at the library itself, noting to his surprise that the library's windows remained intact in spite of Kotomi's prolonged aural attack.  He suspected Plexiglas, though how that would have ended up being used for library windows was a mystery to him.  She stopped playing as she took notice of him and bowed.

 

"...Tomoya kun, hello," she said in greeting.

 

"Kotomi chan," he replied with a slight bow.  "...What brings you here on a Sunday?"

 

"...I'm an honorary library attendant," Kotomi said as he passed her and sat down on a chair facing the table she had been playing the violin near.

 

"Oh?  What does that entail?" he asked as she sat across from him, placing her hands on top of a bag containing a parcel of some sort she had apparently brought with her that was sitting on the table.  A thermos and some disposable cups sat alongside the parcel, next to some small paper plates.  He sniffed the air tentatively, raising an eyebrow at the smell of apple pie.

 

"...I watch over the library."

 

"Huh.  How did you get into that?"  He considered her with a thoughtfully furrowed brow.

 

"...I was borrowing the key day after day, and then the librarian gave me the key and made me an honorary library attendant," she said with a slight blush.

 

He closed his eyes, doing his best to chase away thoughts about how cute her blush was.  He let them flow over and away from him.  "That explains that," he said after a moment.

 

"...I'm usually reading books, but today, I'm practicing the violin."  She began to unwrap the parcel, pushing away the top of the bag holding it.  "I was told not to use the theater club's room, so I was practicing here."

 

"That explains that as well," he said as he leaned back in his chair with a smirk.  "You can hear it for quite some distance, you know."

 

"...I want everyone to hear it," she said with a small smile.

 

"...Well, I can hear it loud and clear almost from my house, and that's a fair distance away," he said, then frowned.  "...I have to wonder about your technique though..."

 

She ceased her uncovering of the parcel, brought the violin up from its resting place, put it under her chin, and played a few armour piercing notes before stopping.

 

"...There is nothing wrong with my technique," she said.

 

He regarded her with a slight twitch in his eyebrow for a moment before shrugging.  "...So, what's in the package?"  He motioned his head toward the package in question.

 

"...It's my bento," she replied, looking down at the aforementioned article.  "I was thinking that maybe you would come.  So I made enough for two."

 

He blinked.  "But what if I hadn't have come?"

 

"...I don't know.  You did though."

 

"So I did."

 

"It's an apple pie," she said as she lifted the lid on the box to present what his nose had already guessed for him.  "It's my first time making it, so I don't know if I made it well."

 

He gazed at the pie sitting between the two of them thoughtfully.  It smelled good.  It looked good.  Odds were that it was good.  Odds were equally likely that he'd still eat it even if it wasn't.  He communicated as much, omitting only the last part while she sliced the pie.

 

"...I used sour apple and coated it with an apricot jam smoothed with rum," she stated confidently as she slid two slices onto plates before she unscrewed the thermos and poured some tea into the cups.  "This tea, too.  I used actual tea leaves for the first time."

 

"From recipes?"

 

"...Yes," she replied as she slid one of the plates in front of Okazaki and set one of the cups of tea to the side of his plate.

 

"...Itadakimasu," Kotomi intoned.

 

"Itadakimasu," Okazaki rejoined, then took a bite of the apple pie.  He chewed thoughtfully as Kotomi looked on.  "Your first time, you said?"

 

"...Um...  It wasn't good?"

 

"On the contrary.  Hm.  No prior experience with making pies?"

 

"...Very little."

 

"Are you familiar with a concept known as 'awesomeness by analysis'?"

 

"...A term," she said with a nod, "popularized by the website tvtropes dot org, denoting the ability of an individual without prior experience with a skill, by reading about or watching the skill in practice, to use the skill at a master's level.  There are numerous examples of this in media, and real life examples include toddlers and young children, whom use this ability to augment the learning process."

 

"...Well," Okazaki said, slightly surprised, doing his best to ignore the swell of emotions coursing through him as the result of her info dump.

 

 _‘Damn it all, must she do stuff like that?  It's so...  Hot.’_   He was sure if he still had a normal heart it would be beating faster.  ‘ _Gods damn it, I feel like some lovesick teenager.  It's infatuation, brush it off, brush it off...’_   He took a sip of tea to calm himself.

 

"...It's very good pie,” he said.  “It would not be out of place in a professional pastry shop."

 

She regarded him blankly, as if she hadn't quite processed his words.

 

He took another bite.  As he chewed, he realized she hadn't changed expression.  "Kotomi chan?"

 

She blinked and looked down with a blush.

 

He closed his eyes.

 

"...Um," she began at last, with a dash of hopefulness.  "Is it really good?  Really for real?"

 

"Really for real."

 

"...Thank goodness," she affirmed with a beatific smile.  "I'm really...  Really happy."

 

He grit his teeth.  She could say and be happy when he complimented her cooking _now_.  She could think of him as a friend and someone worth sharing food with _now_.  When she learned about who he really was...  What he had done...  He looked down at the pie in front of him, suppressing a sigh.  And when she did find out...

 

The kindest thing he could do really at this point would be to push her away.  Wouldn't it?  Or would she regress, or become even worse than she had been, being rejected so utterly by her childhood friend?  He couldn't take the chance.

 

And somehow he felt that even if he tried, it would be far more difficult to do than it seemed on the surface.  It was a humbling thought, and one that depressed him.  Each way he looked, any decision he might make, she still would lose in the end, and so would he.

 

He gnashed his teeth in frustration and dismay.  He should never have stayed here, should never have tried to partake in a 'normal' high school life.  All his plans, all for that one day when he remembered him being in this school from his past life...  He should have just enrolled and shut out the world elsewise.  He could have stopped going after that one day, and no one would have been the wiser.

 

Perhaps Kotomi would still be in the library each day, perhaps she would have been alone, but she wouldn't have gotten so close either, would be spared the inevitable hurt and horror when she learned just what sort of person she had befriended.  But it was too late now, too late by far.

 

He dared not let anything show outwardly, keeping his face schooled to be utterly neutral.

 

\----0----

 

Kotomi took Okazaki’s empty plate after he finished and stacked it on top of hers, cleaning up.

 

"Thanks," he said mutedly, feeling tired at the level of the soul.

 

She nodded and smiled.  "...You know, Tomoya kun," she began, her face reddening slightly as she looked down and to the side nervously, "Only if you don't mind..."

 

He blinked as he did his best to ignore thoughts about how cute she appeared, and failing.

 

She looked to the other side and back as she fidgeted in her seat.  "...Can we..."

 

He raised an eyebrow.

 

"...Can we...  ...With one another...  ...Read a book?"

 

He breathed a small sigh of relief.  For a moment there, he thought she might ask something untoward.  "...What, the same book?"

 

She nodded.

 

He thought about it for a few seconds, and then shrugged.  There was no harm in it, or at least no further harm in it than had already occurred.  Probably.  And it seemed to mean a lot to her, given the nervous display she had shown when trying to ask.  "Sure, I don't see why not."

 

Kotomi stood and took one of the free seats next to his and laid out the book she apparently had in mind, _Theoretical Astrophysics, Volume 2_ , in front of them.  Okazaki gave her plenty of room.  She leaned over toward him, then against him.  He mentally sighed in dismay.  He had been wrong.  There was great harm to be had in agreeing to read with her.

 

She was warm.

 

The sensation of her leaning against him as they read was comfortable in a way he hadn't really ever felt before.  It made his heart tear itself between bliss and an abyss of sadness.  It would have been better for both parties if he had just stood up and left, he suspected.  To his dismay he found he couldn't do so.

 

They stayed like that for most of the day, just reading.  It wasn't until sunset neared that they called it a day and left the library.  Okazaki accompanied Kotomi to her neighborhood, still feeling flummoxed and out of his element, as the result of what he knew intellectually to be very little.  Most people wouldn't have concerned themselves with it.  Okazaki couldn't help but be disquieted by it.

 

"...I'll see you tomorrow, Tomoya kun," she said as they prepared to part ways.  He nodded.

 

"...I'll see you tomorrow then," he stated neutrally.  He watched her walk off, but was surprised when she stopped and turned around.

 

"...You know, Tomoya kun," she began.

 

"...Yeah?"

 

"...I was really happy that you came today."  He allowed a small smile.

 

"I'm glad too," he lied.

 

"...Bye," she turned around and began walking again.  He watched her until she went out of sight.

 

"...Damn it all," he cursed softly to himself and let his head fall onto his hand in dismay.  ‘ _It's not right...  It's just not right...’_

 

\----0----

 

It was sometime during the night when the bevy of tests finished running and announced their results to the overmind.  Okazaki breathed a sigh in his sleep, not sure whether it was a sigh of relief or a sigh of dejection.

 

Naoyuki was taking illegal drugs, and had been for quite some time.  The blood tests proved that much.  But as far as illegal drugs were concerned, they weren't the types that were particularly harmful.

 

He contemplated what he should do with the knowledge, but ultimately decided to let things continue.  He would have to take the occasional blood sample now though, just to make sure Naoyuki didn't start doing something that would genuinely harm him.  If it kept the misery at bay, then he supposed that he could understand it.  That didn't mean he had to like it, or that he couldn't keep an eye on it.

 

\----0----

 

"...Is that the Big Dango Family?" Okazaki asked with a raised eyebrow the following morning as he looked at the poster, tacked on to a green bulletin board in the school entrance.  It read, "Ichinose Kotomi - Violin Recital - Today, after school in the front yard.  Free entrance".  It was covered in circles with dashes resembling eyes on them; a fair immitation of the Big Dango Family.

 

"They're so cute," Furukawa said from his left, beaming.  "I love them!"

 

He grunted noncommittally.

 

"I asked her to make it," Kyou noted from his right.  "Honestly, I questioned the Big Dango Family, but it has a good impact, so I said okay."

 

"I'm sure lots of guests will be there," Fujibayashi observed from further right.

 

"Now we go invite everyone we know before the end of the day!" Kyou declared enthusiastically.

 

Okazaki considered this for a moment, as he looked at three girls around him.  Outside of Kotomi, whom was the star of the show, and Sunohara, he didn't really know anyone well enough to get away with inviting them to a recital.

 

Tomoyo perhaps; though in all likelihood she wouldn't have the time for it, and besides, it would probably be rather awkward to ask.  He frowned and shook that thought off.  He was rationalizing yet again; old habits die hard after all, no matter what you do to try to kill them.

 

He considered asking Sunohara, but dismissed the thought.  He'd said he'd try to keep Sunohara off of Tomoyo's back, and he wasn't going to go back on his word.  Plus, he still felt it would be less than a good idea to introduce Sunohara to Kotomi.

 

\----0----

 

"Ah, there you are," Okazaki said, falling in step beside Tomoyo as she walked back to class from lunch.

 

"Huh?  Okazaki kun?" she asked, slightly confused.

 

"Could I trouble you to go to a violin recital?" he asked, having decided that the straight approach would work best.

 

"Violin recital?"  She raised an eyebrow and stopped, before she turned to regard him with a confused expression.

 

"Yeah," he replied as he stopped beside her.  "I'm asking everyone I know, but it's a short list."

 

"Humm, that depends on when it is."

 

"Right after school.  In the front yard."

 

"Humm..."  She brought a finger to her chin thoughtfully.  "I think I can make it, yes."

 

"Alright then," he returned with a nod.  Tomoyo started to walk forward, prompting Okazaki to do the same.  "While I have your attention, have you thought about, well..."  He leaned in conspiratorially.  "Having a spar?"

 

She stopped once more to regard him with a small measure of irritation.  "You're persistent in your own way," she said.

 

"A little," he admitted.  "Just say no though if you don't want to.  No problem."

 

She looked at him for a few more moments before shaking her head.  "It is as you said earlier.  I don't want to give a violent impression when I'm trying to be elected for student council president."

 

"Heh, there are ways around that," Okazaki noted with a smirk.  "But I'll respect your wishes."

 

Tomoyo smiled a little at that.  "I thank you for that," she said, and continued walking to her original destination.

 

He shrugged with an amused smile as he watched her go.  _'C'est la vie,'_ he thought.

 

\----0----

 

There were a lot of guests at the recital, Okazaki noted as he adjusted the 'staff' armband around his upper arm.  There were certainly more people at the recital than he would have expected.  However, he was noticing a common trend; all of the attendees from his class had 'wronged' Kyou in some fashion in the past; he suspected blackmail was involved somehow.

 

"What did you do?" one of the students in the crowd whispered to another.

 

"I just skipped cleaning duty the day before yesterday," the second student replied.

 

"Yeah, I only forgot to bring the lifestyle guidance handout back," said the first student.  "Why does that have to get us into this?"

 

"I was threatened for eating lunch early half a year ago," noted a third student sitting next to the talking pair.

 

Okazaki sighed and shook his head, his suspicions confirmed.  ‘ _That Kyou,’_ he thought to himself with amusement.

 

"Okazaki!" Sunohara called out as he waved with a smirk and ran up to him.

 

Okazaki hid a frown.  He'd assumed that Sunohara had been skipping classes as he hadn't seen him until then, but apparently he had been wrong judging by the fact that Sunohara was wearing his uniform.

 

"...What's with this crowd?" Sunohara asked with raised eyebrows.  "Is something happening here?"

 

Okazaki contemplated telling him to leave, but opted to find out why he was there first instead.  "...What are you here for?"

 

"Kyou asked me to come out," Sunohara stated with a cat-like smile.  He practically swooned.  "She said a real cute chick wants to see me.  Man, it's tough being a playboy."

 

Okazaki's eye twitched.  He had to give it to Kyou; she knew how to get Sunohara to go somewhere and not leave no matter what.  Once the poor bastard had an idea like that in his head, there was no way he would leave no matter what anyone told him.  He sighed and put a hand on his friend's shoulder.  "...Good luck with that."

 

"When I get to know her well," Sunohara replied, clapping his hand on Okazaki's shoulder, "I'll introduce her to you, too."  He ran off, shouting "Later!" over his shoulder.

 

Okazaki shook his head.  "...Maybe I can get Tomoyo to kick him hard enough to forget the whole thing," he mused, only halfway in jest.


	10. The Way of the Violin, Part 2

"Oh, you got roped into this too?" Okazaki asked Sagara Misae as she stood to the side, petting her tomcat as it took up residence in her arms.

 

"The bunch from the rugby club invited me," she said.  "I had some time, so I wanted to hear what it's like."

 

He pondered this as he saw Tomoyo close in on them.

 

"Would you be Sagara Misae san," Tomoyo began with a note of excitement, "the dorm parent of the boys' dorm?"

 

"Yes, I am," Misae replied with a blink.

 

"I'm Sakagami Tomoyo," she said by way of introduction, hand on her chest and a serious look on her face.  "A junior.  I'm familiar with the rumors about you.  You were a legendary student council president, and you're now working as a dorm parent."

 

"You're exaggerating," Misae replied with a laugh, waving it off.  "It was nothing like that."  She addressed her cat.  "Right?"

 

It mewed in agreement.

 

"I'm aiming to become the student council president as well," Tomoyo said.  "May I visit you to ask for advice in the near future?"

 

"I can't give you much in the way of advice," Misae replied.  "If you're okay with that, come anytime you like."

 

"Misae san!" roared some rugby members from the crowd as one; it appeared that they had forced some of the other students to move out of the way.  "We reserved a seat for you!"

 

"See you," Misae said to Tomoyo before walking off to join the rugby players.

 

Okazaki watched her go for a moment then looked at Tomoyo.

 

She turned to him.  "You have my gratitude, Okazaki," she confessed with a triumphant smile.  "Thank you for inviting me to this recital."  She too ran off to join the crowd.  "Later," she called behind her.

 

He shook his head with a small smile.  He supposed tracking her down hadn't been wasted effort after all.

 

"Okazaki san?" a familiar voice called out from a group of new arrivals.

 

"Sanae san," Okazaki replied evenly as he turned to the source of the voice.  She wore a beatific smile, as seemed normal for her.  "Akio san," he addressed the smirking man beside her.  "How'd you get roped into this?"

 

"I invited them," Furukawa stated, walking up to them with a smile that matched her mother's.

 

"Of course," Okazaki replied warily.  He still remembered his last visit with them.  The thought of the heights of inanity they might reach in a public spot like this admittedly amused him, though he suspected he might end up bearing the brunt of it.  He thought about it further and decided it would be worth the price of admission.

 

"We can't stay away after being invited by our daughter," Akio said.

 

"We couldn't come for the Founder's Festival," Sanae said as they all took seats in the crowd, "so we wanted to make it today."

 

Okazaki thought about this.

 

"Ah, there's Kotomi chan," Furukawa pointed out glibly as the person in question walked toward the impromptu stage.

 

Kotomi was flanked by the Fujibayashi sisters, and held the violin in her arms protectively.

 

Furukawa began making her way to the stage.

 

"She's a cute girl," Sanae enthused.

 

"Not as cute as our daughter," Akio said confidently.

 

Okazaki bit back a reply, annoyed at himself for needing to do so.

 

"Alright," Kyou exclaimed, waving her arms to get everyone's attention.  "Thank you all for coming."

 

"Look, she made me buy these," one of the students from earlier observed, holding a cheap pair of earplugs.

 

"Me, too," lamented another.  "For three hundred yen."

 

Okazaki sighed and rolled his eyes.

 

"So you know," Kyou stated as she glared at the crowd, "the earplugs are your last resort.  There will be penalties waiting for the spineless wimps who use them early."

 

Okazaki shook his head at the blatent display of mercantilism even as an amused smile wormed its way onto his face.

 

"Kotomi chan," added Fujibayashi, "your introduction to everyone."

 

"...Uh?  ...Y-Yes," Kotomi breathed after a moment's confusion.

 

 _'She seems nervous,'_ Okazaki thought to himself.  It was endearing, he noted with irritation.

 

"...Um, my name is Ichinose Kotomi.  A senior in Class A.  My hobby is reading books.  Thank you for coming today."  She bowed, and Okazaki blinked.  They had been working on more than just her violin skill, it seemed.

 

"Well said," Kyou declared proudly.  "Everyone, a round of applause."  There was muted clapping from the crowd.

 

Okazaki added his own clap.

 

"What's with the lame clapping?" Kyou growled out.  "Give me more noise!"  The crowd erupted into loud, if somewhat frightened cheering.

 

"She's a pretty good MC," Akio said, stroking his chin.

 

Kotomi handed her violin to Fujibayashi and worked her way onto the bench they had brought out for the event.

 

"Here's the first piece of the day," Kyou announced after Kotomi had ascended.

 

The younger Fujibayashi handed Kotomi her violin, and Kotomi brought the violin up to play.  Furukawa and Fujibayashi started a tempo for Kotomi to play to.

 

Kotomi's liturgy of oblivion shattered the afternoon like a freight train through a plate glass window.  There was wailing and gnashing of teeth as the eardrums of the onlookers succumbed.  A street lamp nearby gave in to the onslaught and shattered, raining glass down on the cement.

 

Sunohara screamed as he ran at Tomoyo in a daze, his plea of "Help me!" doing nothing to save him from a savage series of kicks from Tomoyo.

 

"What do you think you're doing," Tomoyo yelled over Kotomi's threnody, "taking advantage of the situation?!"

 

Sunohara landed in a heap, the first casualty of the day.

 

"Puhi, puhi," said a dazed Botan as it crawled from the bushes, the sound of Kotomi's violin an equal opportunity antagonizer.

 

"What is this violin?!" cried Misae with her hands pressed tight against her ears as her tomcat made its way to Botan, driven by some inner strength to be there for the ailing animal.  It bumped into Botan, also dazed.

 

"Puhi puhi puhi," lamented Botan.

 

"Meow," cried the cat weakly.

 

"Puhi," agreed Botan, and they collapsed synchronously.

 

"Akio san," Sanae breathed weakly in Akio's arms, eyes unfocused.  "I don't think I can last any longer."

 

"Sanae..." Akio pled.  "Hang in there, Sanae."  He clutched her to his chest.  "Sanae!!"

 

Okazaki massaged his temples.  Why did Kotomi's violin make everyone so melodramatic?

 

\----0----

 

The performance finished to the relief of everyone involved, except for Kotomi whom seemed to be sad that it had ended.  The nominal staff of the event walked toward the school grounds exit, with Furukawa and Kotomi well ahead of the rest of the group while Kyou and her younger sister followed a bit behind Okazaki.

 

"Looks like everything made it through in one piece," Fujibayashi said. 

 

"Although we had fatalities in the audience," Kyou replied.

 

"You played the last song really well," Furukawa said, not a trace of guile to be found.  "My dad said it was good, too."

 

And, compared to what had come before, it had been good.  However, and Okazaki would never say it aloud, it had been a spectacularly low bar.

 

"He said he hasn't seen a breathtaking stage performance like this in a while," Furukawa continued.

 

He couldn't help a small smile at the pun.  Breathtaking indeed.

 

"...So glad," Kotomi breathed.  "I'm happy."

 

He smiled wider.  Well, it had been worth it, then.

 

A man in a black trench coat, hat, and sunglasses came out from behind some trees near the exit as they walked.  Okazaki narrowed his eyes, smile gone.  Whoever he was, he was making a beeline for the two girls in front of him.

 

Kotomi noticed him and immediately fled behind Furukawa, trembling.

 

That clinched it for Okazaki.  He crouched down.

 

Kyou blinked.  "Huh?  Who-"

 

There were just over twelve meters between Okazaki and the man in the black trench coat.  Okazaki leapt forward.  320 kilograms of protective cyborg covered ten meters in under a second.  The two remaining meters slowed Okazaki down and put him between the man and Furukawa.  The man's eyes widened in shock.

 

They widened more when Okazaki's right hand wrapped around his neck.  He could hear Kotomi murmuring something about the bad guy as she hid behind Furukawa petrified with fear.  Okazaki narrowed his eyes and lifted, just a little.  Enough that the man touched ground with only his toes.

 

The urge to just squeeze, to let his hand crush the man's head off his own neck as like toothpaste from a tube was strong, and only restrained by the present company.

 

"Okazaki san!" exclaimed Furukawa.

 

The Fujibayashi twins caught up with Okazaki.  The younger of the two rushed to Kotomi's aid.  Kyou stared at Okazaki with shock, mirrored by the now red faced man whom clawed at Okazaki's arm futilely, seeking respite from Okazaki's mechanical strength.

 

"Urk," exclaimed the man, whom wore a business suit under his getup.

 

Okazaki judged him to be in his late forties to early fifties.  "Take Kotomi chan home for me, would you?" he requested tonelessly.

 

"...What are you going to do to him?" Kyou asked, doubtlessly remembering what he had told her in the theater club room.  She had remarked that he was talking as if he had killed someone.

 

Okazaki hadn't denied it.  He sighed.

 

"That depends," Okazaki admitted.  "Please.  Go."  The group was silent behind him for a few moments as they looked from Okazaki and the man, to each other, the deathly seriousness of the situation becoming more apparent with each second.  He could see Kyou nod after a few seconds.

 

"Tomoya," Kyou called to him.  "...I hope you know what you're doing."

 

"I do," Okazaki said.

 

They walked away with Kotomi in tow, the frequent glances from each of them as they left the scene staying Okazaki's hand that much longer.  When he could no longer see them, he let the man down.  The man panted for a few moments.

 

"You," he coughed.  "You have the wrong idea."

 

"Walk with me, old man," Okazaki commanded, slipping a hand into his school uniform.  The movie business had made the sound of a gun being cocked ubiquitous; even though he didn't have a gun on his person in the traditional sense, he could still simulate the sound by swapping an Allen Wrench for a larger one in the toolbox that was his hand.

 

The effect on the man as he did so was obvious; behind the sunglasses the man's eyes had widened again.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki regarded the man as they walked.  He seemed...  Harmless.  Nebbish, even.  The sort of person that wouldn't hurt a fly.  Outward appearances were deceiving of course; he knew that he himself looked reasonably inoffensive, but was capable of great evils.  And the reaction that Kotomi had to him was one that only someone whom had been deeply traumatized could have.

 

He suspected child molestation, which would likely lead to a summary execution on his part, damn the consequences.  Having spared him this long however, he wouldn't do so without being sure.

 

He led the man into the middle of the city.  There were people on the street, but at that hour the afternoon rush had already happened, and the evening rush had yet to occur.  One could have a frank discussion and not have to worry too much about being overheard.  More importantly, it was an open area, which was perfect for added...  Insurance.

 

"Sit," Okazaki commanded as he motioned with his free hand to a bench in front of the town square plaza.  The man, whom looked more confused than frightened at this point, did as he was told as he rubbed the growing bruise on his neck.

 

"Green apartment building, roof.  Mitsui Garden Hotel, third floor, last window to the right.  McDonalds, roof," Okazaki stated quietly.

 

The man looked at each in turn, and each time saw a figure appear as if out of thin air, each holding something that looked to be some sort of weapon.  They waved at him as he looked on and disappeared again.  The man gulped, wide eyed and jaw clenched.

 

Okazaki removed his hand from his jacket and sat down beside the man.  "You are being watched," he said in a quiet, emotionless voice.  "If you move from that seat, you will find your life expectancy can be measured in seconds.  If I don't like the answers to your questions, the same applies.  If you lie to me, I will know and again, it will have detrimental effects on your continued ability to draw air.  Do I make myself clear?"

 

"...Perfectly," the man replied with a tremor in his voice.

 

"Good," Okazaki said.  "Let's proceed then.  State your name and occupation."

 

"...Shusaku Yonai, administrator at Riken Accelerator Research Facility," he replied.

 

Okazaki frowned and looked the name up on the internet in his head.  The name and the face matched.  On a hunch, he dug a little further, cross referencing 'Ichinose' with the results and finding that Yonai and Kotomi's parents had worked together on a number of projects.  He'd been an assistant at that time however; it seemed he had risen considerably in the ranks since then.

 

"Interesting," Okazaki said.  "I suppose you play Go then?"

 

Yonai's eye twitched irritatedly to complement his fearful expression.

 

Okazaki suspected he had struck a nerve, and he allowed himself a small smirk.  "You worked with Kotomi's parents, I note."

 

Yonai blinked in surprise at that, and regarded Okazaki with a raised eyebrow.

 

"You look surprised,” Okazaki said with a small smile.  “Don't be.  As I said, I will know if you lie to me.  The 'how' is not important, just accept that I will."

 

Yonai looked down at his hands as he pondered that.

 

Okazaki continued.  "I suppose that explains how you know her.  However, it doesn't explain why she addressed you as a bad guy."

 

Yonai looked down at the ground at hearing this, a morose frown on his face.  "...I guess that's what we still are to her," he mused sadly.

 

"Explain," Okazaki commanded.

 

"...Alright," Yonai relented with a sigh.  He appeared to think for a few seconds before he responded again.  "...As you say, we worked with the Ichinose family at Riken.  On a personal level, the Ichinoses were good friends, and I knew Kotomi kun from when she was little.  You probably already know, but they made me her godfather."

 

Okazaki nodded in spite of not knowing the fact.

 

Yonai smiled a small, sad smile.  "I was part of a team working with the Ichinose family at the time.  They were working on a proof based on results from our experimentation at Riken.  You see, what we can observe isn't the only universe.  There is a realm that was shed and sealed away while this world was taking form.  The hidden world.  The Ichinoses were the first to find evidence of such a world.  Or to be precise, they supposedly had."

 

"But then there was the crash," Okazaki said.

 

"That's right," Yonai said with a nod.  "The Ichinoses were brilliant scientists.  But they were also old fashioned.  They did all of their papers by hand."

 

"Hm, so," Okazaki interrupted, "When the plane went down, their work went down with them.  Am I following this correctly?"

 

"Just so," Yonai stated.  "We thought perhaps there was a copy of the paper in the Ichinose residence.  We went to retrieve it..."  He paused and sighed.  "You probably already know, but it was on Kotomi's birthday when the crash happened.  They had promised to be there for her birthday, but due to an unexpected change in scheduling, the conference where they were to present their findings took place just after her birthday.  The only flight that was available was the one that crashed."  He shook his head.  "I had thought that she would know what had happened.  She had a housemaid that would have found out and explained.  But the housemaid was ill at the time, so she never found out.  Not until I had to tell her, had to explain it to her that her parents had died."

 

Okazaki frowned at that.  It might explain why Kotomi seemed so afraid of Yonai.  To hear news from someone like that at that age...

 

Yonai paused and sighed before continuing on in a tired voice.  "I also asked about the paper.  I found out later from her housemaid that she blamed me for taking her parents away.  She also blamed the paper itself.  I'm not sure of the details, but when we found her later on, she had set fire to...  Something that would look to a child very much like a paper.  There never was an extra copy however.  Her parents had told us how she wanted a teddy bear for her birthday, and the paper she had burnt was a teddy bear catalog."

 

They were both silent after that.

 

Okazaki observed Yonai for any trace of guile, but could find none.  He sighed.  "Fair enough," he said at last.  "In that event I must apologize for my treatment of you."

 

"I suppose I can't blame you for it," Yonai admitted with a sigh as he rubbed his neck.  "It must have looked very suspicious."

 

"Exceedingly," Okazaki said with a shrug.

 

Yonai looked in the directions of Okazaki's covers.

 

"Oh yes,” Okazaki said.  “Don't worry about them.  You're free to go."

 

Yonai sighed again and sunk back into the bench.  "Ah, right."  He rubbed his eyes.  "...I have to ask though...  Who are you?  And what are your interests in Kotomi?"

 

"Me?" Okazaki replied innocently.  "You would feel better not knowing who I am, honestly.  As for my interests in Kotomi..."  He paused, and allowed himself a sad smile.  "She is my friend.  And I will do what I can to protect her.  As it so happens, that is quite a bit."

 

"I see," Yonai said after a few moments thought.  "Will you pass on a message for me, then?"

 

"That depends on the message," Okazaki replied.  "What is it?"

 

"Simply this," Yonai said.  "I don't expect you to forgive us, but we still regret what happened that day."

 

"Hm."  Okazaki regarded Yonai with suspiciously narrowed eyes for a moment then sighed.  "Very well."

 

"I thank you for that," Yonai replied as he stood up.  "I bid you a good day."

 

"Fare thee well," Okazaki replied in English.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki sat there in silence after Yonai left.  The day darkened and turned to night, and still he sat.  He watched the evening rush come and go, simply waiting.  When midnight passed and still no police arrived, he figured that Yonai had not reported the incident and stood up.  It was just as well, he decided.

 

Having the police involved would have likely complicated future matters, even if he could circumvent them to a degree.  He shook his head.  It had been a foolish risk to interrogate Yonai so openly though.  He was still making mistakes like that when angered; he would have thought he would have learned not to by now.  He had gotten lucky this time.  He doubted he would again.  With that in mind, he walked home to rest for the night.

-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A note from the author:**

 

I’d like to apologize for my relative slowness in updating to this chapter, but I can’t say I’ll be any better in the near future because with college having started back up, things are going to ramp up very quickly and I probably won’t have much time to write.  I won’t be leaving this to drift however, but it will probably be about a month before I update again.

 

I’ll try to make it worth the wait.


	11. Breaking the Balance, Part 1

"Did you do something to Fujibayashi?"

 

"Hm?  What do you mean?"  Okazaki replied as he looked out the classroom window at the school grounds.  He could almost see the school gates from this angle.  It was where he had intercepted Shusaku Yonai when he had tried to deliver his message to Kotomi.

 

He had pondered the message that Yonai had entrusted him with; or more accurately the timing of the events.  The same day he lost his memory was the same day Kotomi's parents died in a crash.  It would be nine years ago that he lost a year's worth of memory.  It could be coincidence, but it seemed exceedingly unlikely.

 

There were a few reasons why he would have chosen then to perform the procedure.  Chief of which would be to provide Kotomi with a companion that needn't leave; a case of irony if so.  He managed to deny her companionship period by that act.

 

Also high on the list would be trying to use the procedure to mount some sort of rescue attempt.  The plane which had carried the Ichinoses had done so in the frigid North Atlantic waters.  There was a chance that, even if they had been killed, he could have likewise performed the procedure on them and in so doing restore them to life.

 

Though ice crystals had damaging effects on human cells, nanites could potentially read the neural structure if the brains hadn't been badly damaged and restore the pattern in a clone body.

 

But there was an apparent potential for brain damage there, as he had experienced firsthand.  Even now, he wasn't entirely sure what happened.  How much more would it have affected a brain that had been through the rigors of freezing, Okazaki couldn't speculate.  Considering what happened to him, maybe it was for the best that he didn’t find the Ichinoses.  Brain damage had unpredictable effects; there would be no way of telling what actually would have come back if he had tried.  Like perhaps two psychotics that acted normal on the exterior but decided to go home and eat their daughter for lunch.  It was perhaps an extreme example, but Okazaki couldn't say an impossible one.

 

He shook the thoughts off as he listened to Sunohara.

 

"She's been looking at you strangely.  Like she's afraid of you or something."

 

"I see," Okazaki said.  He wouldn't be too surprised if Fujibayashi feared him now; it must have looked like he was planning to take Yonai off to somewhere quiet in order to kill him.  It was less of a misunderstanding than pegging Yonai for being a child molester, considering that murder had definitely been on Okazaki's mind at the time.  Yonai just wanted to check up on Kotomi, near as he could tell.  It was actually sort of funny in a way.

 

"...So did you?"

 

"I didn't do anything to Fujibayashi."  ‘ _Or anyone else for that matter, appearances aside.’_

 

"Hum, wonder why she's doing that then..."

 

"It doesn't matter.  Just drop it, alright?"

 

"Huh?"  Sunohara looked at Okazaki with a raised eyebrow.  "So something _did_ happen?"

 

Okazaki sighed.

 

"Just a misunderstanding," Okazaki replied.  "No one was hurt, nothing actually happened.  Even if it may have looked it."  Okazaki sighed again as Sunohara blinked at him.  "Look, just...  Let it go, alright?  It'll pass with time."

 

"...Well, alright..."  Sunohara didn't look convinced, but he let the matter go.

 

\----0----

 

"I think maybe if..."  Furukawa stopped talking and looked at Okazaki as he entered the room.  The group was sitting around an open box of costumes, the bric-a-brac contents strewn over the sides.

 

Furukawa held a noh mask in her hands, its ivory visage gleaming in the fluorescent light.  Both Fujibayashis also looked over, the elder with a measure of curiosity and apprehension as she let the straight jacket sleeve she had been examining drop, and the younger with a healthy dose of fear as she tossed the helmet with the ace of spades painted on its side back into the box.

 

The only one of the group that looked at him normally was Kotomi, whom smiled at him, prop pistol lying in her hands.

 

"Hey," he said.

 

"...Tomoya kun, hello!" Kotomi replied, then looked at the three girls around her with confusion.

 

"Kotomi chan, greetings," he replied.

 

"...Hey Tomoya," Kyou said at last.

 

"Okazaki san, hello," Furukawa said finally as she stood up from her position by a box of props to give a polite bow.

 

Fujibayashi looked to Kyou for guidance, whom gave her a nod.

 

"...Okazaki san," she said, causing him to blink at the change in honorific, "hello."

 

"...So, what am I interrupting?" he asked, trying to clear the air.

 

"...We were looking at costumes," Kotomi said, the others too busy too busy looking at each other thoughtfully.

 

"I see," Okazaki replied and looked at the other three girls with a small frown.

 

Kyou stood up and walked over to Okazaki with a serious expression.

 

Okazaki raised an eyebrow, and stepped back guardedly.

 

"Sister!" exclaimed the younger Fujibayashi.

 

Kotomi looked between Kyou and the younger sister with continued confusion.

 

"Tomoya," Kyou said as she stood in front of him.  "We need to talk."  Kyou looked back at her half panicked sister and Furukawa, whom looked on worriedly, and smiled.  "Don't worry, this won't be long."  She walked around Okazaki and left the room.  He followed.

 

\----0----

 

"Tomoya," Kyou glared at him as they stood in an empty classroom not far from the theater club, "what the hell?"

 

"This isn't the proper time for a tsukkomi," Okazaki said wryly.

 

"Can it," she growled.  "What the hell was that all about yesterday?  And what was that thing you did?"

 

"...Take a seat," he said, gesturing to one of the empty chairs.  "It may be a long story."

 

"...Fine," she relented and stomped over to plop herself on a seat.  "Now will you tell me what is going on?"

 

Okazaki sighed and walked over to another seat, sitting down gently and resting his legs on another nearby seat.  "I'm sure that the first thing you want to know is whether or not he's alive."

 

She nodded.

 

"He is.  He's just fine, except maybe some bruising on his neck."

 

"About that.  I knew you were strong, but you were lifting him up like it was nothing.  That's not normal, Tomoya!"

 

"No, it's not."

 

"And that jump.  You jumped almost that whole distance in one leap, from a standstill.  Tomoya," she paused for a moment.  "I'm not sure how far away you were from them, but it had to have been at least ten meters.  I watched the Olympics last year.  Do you know what the winning long jump distance was?"

 

"Nine point two three meters," he said with a shrug, the internet connection in his head once again at work.

 

"Exactly.  And they have a good running start.  Tomoya...  Just what are you?"

 

"That's..."  He frowned.  "Very complicated."

 

"Argh!" she halfway screamed in frustration.  "Why are you being so...  Obtuse?  I hate it when you're like that!"

 

"Look, Kyou, I know this is all very strange.  But..."  He paused to collect his thoughts.  "Have you ever had a secret so important, so earth shattering, that you dare not speak it to anyone?"

 

"Don't give me that.  If it's such an important secret, you're not exactly doing much to hide it."

 

"...You have me there.  That was a...  Lapse, on my part, yesterday."

 

"So spill the beans.  What are you?"

 

"...I can't say," Okazaki said, which made Kyou glare at him.  "Not right now.  You...  Everyone...  Will find out.  Sooner than I would like.  But for now..."  He trailed off.

 

Kyou looked at him thoughtfully for a few seconds before sighing.  "...Fine.  Alright.  But...  As I've said, we're friends.  You can tell me."

 

"I know," he said, and gave her a small, sad smile.  "Thank you."

 

A few moments of comfortable silence passed.

 

"You know," she smiled softly, "Kotomi doesn't know exactly what happened.  I think she blanked it out a little bit."

 

"Hm."

 

"So who was that man, and what did he do to Kotomi to make her act like that?"

 

"...Would you believe nothing?"  He raised his eyebrow slightly.

 

She blinked and looked at him with a raised eyebrow.  "That wasn't the reaction of someone that had nothing happen to them."

 

"...There's a few things about it that I'm not sure I can tell you.  It has to do with Kotomi's past, and...  Well, that's her prerogative to share.  I will say this though.  He may have looked suspicious, but he...  Had no untoward thoughts regarding Kotomi.  If he's guilty of anything, it's carelessness."  He snorted.  "I mean really, what sort of man approaches teenage girls in a trench coat and hat like that?  Tch."

 

"...I see."  She sighed.  "I guess I'll have to interrogate Kotomi then," she said with a theatric shrug.

 

"...Whatever it is you're planning," Okazaki warned, "don't."

 

"...Spoilsport," Kyou replied with a huff.

 

\----0----

 

When Kyou and Okazaki entered the room again, Fujibayashi was almost in tears, apparently worried about her sister.  Furukawa and a confused Kotomi had done their best to console her, to little effect.  It was only upon seeing her sister's safe return, did she calm down.

 

"Fujibayashi," he said as he knelt in front of her.

 

Fujibayashi gasped slightly.

 

"...Why are you acting so afraid?"

 

"Eheheh," Kyou chuckled sheepishly from behind them, "that may be my fault."

 

"What did you do?"  He turned to regard the elder sister warily.

 

"...Kind of told her a bit about our conversation the day before yesterday," she admitted.

 

He shook his head and looked back at Fujibayashi.  "...I'm not going to say that I'm harmless," he began, "but I'm not going to do anything to you, your sister, or anyone here."

 

Fujibayashi looked at him for a moment, then at Kyou, whom nodded.  She looked down at the floor.  "...But..." she started, a whirlwind of expressions on her face.  She was silent for a few moments as she looked to Kyou again.  "...Okay," she replied at last.

 

He nodded and straightened out with a sigh.  The group dynamic had changed; he wondered if it would ever return to how it was.

 

"Okazaki, will you take Kotomi chan and the violin to where she got it from?" Kyou said as she sat down beside her sister.  "They probably want it back now."

 

"Ah, sure," he replied.  He looked at Kotomi, who appeared to be completely confused by their conversation.  "Kotomi chan."

 

"...Ah?" She looked at him.

 

"It's time to take back the violin," he said.  She blinked, apparently in deep thought for a few seconds, and nodded.

 

\----0----

 

"...What was wrong with Ryou chan?" Kotomi asked after they left the room.

 

"...She's concerned for her sister," Okazaki replied.  "She saw what I did yesterday."

 

"...Yesterday?"

 

"...I've been asked to deliver a message.  It reads as follows:  I don't expect you to forgive us, but we still regret what happened that day."

 

Kotomi blinked at Okazaki and stopped, the case slowly slipping through her fingers until it clattered to the floor.

 

"...You've talked to him."

 

"I have," he admitted as he reached down to pick up the dropped violin.

 

She began walking again slowly, and he followed.

 

"...Then you know?" she asked tonelessly.

 

"About the paper?"

 

She wilted.  "...Yes."

 

He waited for her to continue, but she remained silent.  He could see tears starting in her eyes, and she wiped at them.  "...Are you alright, Kotomi chan?"

 

She sniffed a little bit.

 

He waited patiently as she calmed herself, resisting the urge to just hug her and tell her everything was going to be alright.  Several minutes passed in silence as she collected herself.

 

"...Yes," she said finally.

 

He nodded and, giving in partway, patted her on the shoulder.  "Then let's return this violin, alright?"  He held up the instrument in question.

 

She nodded.

 

\----0----

 

"Thank you so much for lending me the violin," Kotomi said gratefully.  By the time they had arrived, she looked like she was more or less back to her normal self, to Okazaki’s relief.

 

"Sorry we borrowed it for so long,” he said.  “I'm sure you thought we'd bring it back the next day."

 

"This actually isn't the school's property," the blue haired girl whom had played the violin originally said.  "It's something a graduate from several years ago left here.  I was asked by a teacher to check if it could still be played, since it's an old violin."

 

"...That violin..." Kotomi began.  "...It is old and the strings are wearing out, but it is a wonderful violin.  So please don't throw it out."  She bowed.  "Please."

 

The blue haired girl in front of her smiled serenely.  "Yes.  I was planning to tell that to the teacher, too."

 

"Thank goodness," Kotomi replied gratefully with a smile as she straightened up.  She blinked.  "Oh right.  I had forgotten.  Hello.  Nice to meet you."  She bowed.

 

He raised an eyebrow.

 

"My name is Ichinose Kotomi.  A senior in Class A.  My hobby is reading books.  I would be happy if you would become my friend."

 

Okazaki scratched his cheek.  _'...Well.  Guess Kyou didn't account for a scenario when she would introduce herself to someone she already knew...'_

 

"...My name is Nishina Rie," the blue haired girl said at last.  "It's nice to make your acquaintance."

 

\----0----

 

When Okazaki and Kotomi returned to the clubroom, they found that only Kyou remained.

 

"Huh, where is everyone?" he asked, noting that the time was well before when the group normally dispersed.

 

"Well Tomoya, they're..."  Kyou paused, a thoughtful frown on her face.  "...A bit uneasy about you right now."

 

"...I see," he said.

 

Kotomi gaped at the two of them.  "...What happened yesterday?"

 

"Eheh," Kyou chucked uneasily as she took a step back and scratched the back of her head.

 

"There were some misunderstandings yesterday," he said.  "To make a long story short, it looked like I was about to inflict bodily harm on someone."

 

"...Oh," Kotomi breathed, looking down slightly with a softly furrowed brow.

 

"No one got hurt though," he continued.

 

"That's right," Kyou said.  "I'll talk to Ryou about it, so don't worry about that."  She smirked and gave Okazaki a thumbs up.

 

He nodded with a sad half smile.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki saw Furukawa the next day as he walked down the path to the school.  He started to walk toward her.

 

She turned to him.  There was fear in her eyes, yes.  Also a look of mild betrayal.

 

Okazaki stopped.

 

She took a step back nevertheless.

 

Okazaki sighed and turned, walking forward to the school.  He could see Furukawa behind him, watching his back as he walked.  He sighed again, the feeling of being alienated wrapping itself about him, familiar and cold.  He wondered if she would speak to him again.  ‘ _Careless, careless, careless...’_

 

\----0----

 

Lunch period saw Okazaki wandering the hallways.  He wondered again if the group dynamic would return fully.  Fujibayashi, he noted, hadn't looked at him fearfully in classes; perhaps Kyou had been successful in talking to her sister.  He couldn't be sure until they talked again.  He walked past a classroom, noting the tag on the wall.  _'Class A.  That's supposed to be Kotomi's class.'_

 

"Hey, Ichinose san," came a female voice from within the room.  "This problem number three..."

 

He blinked.

 

"First you set x = cosine theta," replied Kotomi from within, "and then this becomes this.  So the answer is pi over nine."

 

He blinked again and looked into the classroom.

 

Kotomi was sitting at a desk within, surrounded by three girls and apparently giving a lecture.

 

It was heartening to him to see.

 

"I get it!" exclaimed the girl to Kotomi's right.  "Thank you!"

 

"You really are smart, Ichinose san," declared the girl to Kotomi's left.

 

Kotomi blushed in response to the praise and he turned his head, a small smile on his face as he began walking away.

 

"Oh yeah," declared the third girl as he left, "You were the one that was doing the violin concert the other day, right?"

 

Okazaki shook his head.

 

\----0----

 

"Look," Kyou said quietly from within the clubroom as Okazaki neared it after classes ended, "he's the same Tomoya we've always known.  Have some respect."

 

He sighed and leaned against the wall near the door.

 

"...You're right," Furukawa murmured.  "He was just trying to protect Kotomi chan."

 

"Exactly," Kyou said.  "And no one got hurt."

 

"He's still scary, sister," Fujibayashi added.  "That look on his face..."

 

"He was being protective," Kyou defended.  "If anything it was sort of sweet.  Right, Kotomi chan?"  There was a moment of silence.  "See?"

 

"Well..." Fujibayashi began, then paused.  "...Alright, you're right."

 

"Good," Kyou said.  "Now let's just, act natural when he arrives.  Nagisa chan, have you heard anything from Koumura?"

 

"Yes," Furukawa admitted, "but all he's said is that he's still thinking about it."

 

Okazaki shook his head.  Koumura may be clever, but he was also slow to act sometimes.  Normally it was an admirable trait, but it could also be annoying if you were on the wrong end of it.  _'Probably waiting to see if anyone else needed an advisor,'_ he thought.

 

"Ahhh?  Still?" Kyou exclaimed.

 

"He's a busy man," Furukawa mumbled.  "I'm sure he hasn't had the time to think about it much..."

 

"Mmm, I may have to go have a talk with him myself," Kyou said thoughtfully.

 

It seemed as good a time as any to make his entrance, so Okazaki rounded the door.

 

"A talk with who?" he asked innocently, looking at the inhabitants of the room.

 

Both Furukawa and Fujibayashi jumped up in surprise as he entered the room.

 

Kyou was near the door of the room, standing almost like a teacher lecturing students.  Appropriately enough, Furukawa and Fujibayashi were seated on the ground in front of her almost like students.  Kotomi, he noticed as he looked further in the room, was situated near the boxes in the back, playing with a prop she had pulled from one of the boxes.

 

He resisted doing a double take as he wondered how a black omega starfury model had made its way into the prop boxes.  Almost as an afterthought, he noticed that she had several large parcels in bags to her side.  A sniff of the air made him suspect that she had brought not inconsiderable amounts of food with her.

 

"Ah, Okazaki," Furukawa cried in surprise.  "Um, um..."

 

"...Tomoya kun," Kotomi said with a smile as she put down the model, "Hello."

 

"Hey Tomoya," Kyou said glibly.

 

He barely kept an eyebrow from rising.  It was just slightly _too_ glib.  _'She's forcing it,'_ he realized.  _'She's a little afraid too, even though she'd never admit it.  That's...  Depressing.'_

 

"...Hello Okazaki san," Fujibayashi added after a moment.

 

"Um, hello Okazaki san," Furukawa said at last.

 

Kyou looked between Furukawa and her sister and sighed exasperatedly.  "No, no, no, no, no!" she almost screamed as she writhed in annoyance.  "This won't do at all!"

 

He sighed.  "It's fine Kyou," he said sadly.  "Some things take time."

 

"Nnnng, fine," Kyou told him.  "So we're going to spend some time together."

 

"...Fair enough."   He refrained from making a sarcastic comment to his only vocal defender in the room with considerable difficulty.

 

"First though," Kyou said, "Kotomi chan brought dinner today.  Wasn't that nice of her?"  Kyou winked slyly at Okazaki.

 

He couldn't suppress the dry look he gave her in return.


	12. Breaking the Balance, Part 2

"You sure made a lot!" Okazaki exclaimed with a raised eyebrow as he looked at Kotomi's bento.  The group sat on an old mat that had been in one of the prop boxes as they stared somewhat awestruck at the amount of food Kotomi had brought with her.

 

Kotomi herself sat to his right while Kyou sat to his left.  Furukawa and Fujibayashi had taken up residence across from him, sitting as far away from him as they could do comfortably.  He mentally shrugged at that; it was sad to him, but it was also only a sign of what was to come he expected.

 

He wondered if any of the girls around him would remain friends even after the truth had come out.  ‘ _Unlikely_ ,’ was the unwelcome return thought.

 

"...I wanted everyone to enjoy some," Kotomi said happily.

 

"Kotomi chan," Fujibayashi began, "what do you usually do when there's no school?"

 

"...I'm usually reading books," Kotomi replied.

 

"I think I'm usually at home," Furukawa admitted shyly.

 

"...I work tirelessly night and day," Okazaki began, the slice of ham in his chopsticks almost symbolic of the level of emotion he put into the statement, "building a mind linked army to counter my past self's mind linked army and preserve the timeline to prevent a paradox!"

 

Kyou regarded him first with a dry expression before she blinked and raised an eyebrow at Okazaki.

 

"...That plot's been used before," Kotomi said, and Kyou sighed, apparently putting whatever thought she had out of mind as her face returned to a dry expression.

 

He grinned.

 

"And what do you really do?" Kyou asked with a voice that was, if anything, even more dry than her expression.

 

"Pick fights and hang out with Sunohara.”

 

"You guys are pathetic," Kyou said.  "The youngsters in the midst of youth are all wasting their time and bodies."

 

"And what exactly do you do, Kyou?" he asked as he made a fair effort to match her droll demeanor.

 

"Nothing," Kyou admitted as if there were no hypocrisy in the fact.

 

"Mmm," Okazaki grunted as he ate the slice of ham.

 

"I have a plan though," Kyou asserted.  "Everyone," she brandished a couple of tsukune on a toothpick for emphasis.  "Meet at the station at nine tomorrow."  At the confused expression on the other girls' faces, not to mention Okazaki's deadpan glower, she wielded the toothpick of tsukune like a sword pointed at the group.  "Group dating.  Group outing.  This is what innocent youngsters should be doing."

 

 _‘And where does that leave me?  I'm neither innocent or a youngster,’_ was his predictably droll mental response.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki and Kotomi met up at their normal separating point and made their way to the station in question, a somewhat utilitarian looking bus station an orange roof and two vending machines to the side, one red and one blue.  He dutifully tried to ignore how well the brown dress Kotomi wore suited her as they walked.

 

Both Fujibayashi sisters were waiting at the station, each with a smile that was to some degree forced on their faces.  Furukawa didn't show up until a few minutes later, prompting him to wonder for a time whether or not she would show at all.  However, she did eventually turn up, slightly breathless and apologetic for her lateness.  It had been waved off, and the group began their odyssey.

 

Kyou directed them through the streets of the city, talking animatedly with Kotomi as Furukawa and Fujibayashi lagged behind slightly, talking to themselves in slightly hushed tones.  He would have worried if he had heard his name come up, but it seemed they had opted on talking about recent shows on television instead.

 

Okazaki and Kyou occasionally directed barbs at each other slightly too glibly, Kyou's acerbic remarks just slightly forced and Okazaki's sardonic replies carrying a slightly morose backing with their sting.  It was enough to give their journey through the city slightly awkward undertones, which made Okazaki sigh mentally.

 

That Kyou had opted for somewhat stereotypical destinations for the group outing was also cause for a mental sigh as they confronted store after store.  He made the most of it, occasionally picking something out of one bin or another and making use of it in an inane fashion.

 

Kyou's latest target was a convenience store, and Okazaki appraised the apparel while the girls with him shopped.  A bargain bin caught his eye, and he pulled an article from it, stretching the item in his hands with consideration.

 

"Perfect," he announced to himself as he stretched the pair of panties he had picked out over his head and began a bad disco dance.  "Hey, check me out," he announced to the store, "I'm the masked crusader, pursuing justice and disco!"

 

"TO-MO-YA...!" growled Kyou as she picked up a book from a nearby rack.

 

Furukawa and Fujibayashi just looked at him wide eyed.

 

Okazaki dodged Kyou's book as he disco danced, taking a moment to grab a mannequin.  He danced an improvised waltz with it, dodging merchandise being thrown by Kyou as staff members moved to intercept them.

 

\----0----

 

"I can't believe you got us banned from the store," Kyou lamented shortly afterward outside the store as she glared at Okazaki.

 

Furukawa and Fujibayashi both laughed softly at the two of them.

 

He grinned at Kyou cheekily.

 

It had been worth it in his opinion to lighten the mood.  It was, after all, hard to take someone disco dancing with a pair of panties on his head too seriously.  He even thought it was worth having to pay for the damaged merchandise.

 

Kyou, however, would probably never forgive him for getting her banned there.  ‘ _Well, those are the risks you take,’_ thought Okazaki.

 

\----0----

 

Lunchtime finally rolled around, and they stopped in a small cafe for drinks and sandwiches.  They sat and began eating, the topic of discussion changing to the resident girl genius.

 

"Big sister," Fujibayashi said after swallowing a bite of sandwich, "Kotomi chan says it's almost her birthday."

 

"...Yup," Kotomi confirmed, sipping from her drink.  "It's next Saturday."

 

"Okay!" Kyou exclaimed.  "We'll get you a present with our hearts in it!"

 

"How very Aztec of you," Okazaki snarked.

 

"...I didn't mean literally Tomoya," Kyou snarled as she regarded Okazaki with an irritated expression.  Okazaki held up his hands in surrender, happily noting that she was no longer having to force her jabs.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki sighed as Kyou struggled with the UFO catcher machine in front of her.  The target of her frustration, an exceedingly large stuffed giant anteater, was unlikely to be able to fit through the prize return slot even if she managed to persuade the claw to grab onto the oversized toy.  She pounded on the window with frustration.

 

"Hey staff!  The placement of the prize is wrong!"  She slapped the window for emphasis.  "No one can ever get this if it's like this!"

 

He shook his head; it was hardly the first time she had called the staff over to reposition the huge plaything.  He looked out at the growing crowd drawn by Kyou's antics.

 

"Again?" was the wary exclamation of the staff member whom Okazaki noted was holding a short segment of a drinking straw.  "Will you give me a break?"

 

"She's still up for it," remarked a man in the on looking crowd.

 

Okazaki found himself sighing once again.

 

"That doll is really big," Fujibayashi said after a few moments, turning to Furukawa with a measure of confusion.

 

"Is it alright to make it bigger than the actual animal?" Furukawa wondered.

 

"There you go," the staff member said, having adjusted the anteater again.

 

"Thank you," Kyou chimed innocently before donning a determined expression.  "Here's my thirty-fourth try."  She held out her hand behind her for another coin to use in the machine.

 

"It's your last chance," Okazaki noted as he dug another coin from his pocket.  "I'm out after this."

 

Kyou turned around at this and pointed at Fujibayashi.  "You're up next, Ryou."

 

"I-I don't have the confidence at all," Fujibayashi blubbered, eyes wide.  "I failed last time, too."

 

"In that case," Kyou switched targets with her pointer finger, "the President."

 

"Me, too," Furukawa admitted gingerly.  "I feel like I would put Okazaki san's money to waste."

 

"...I'll take the case!" exclaimed Okazaki loudly in English, pointer finger in the air.

 

"Yes, I know you can't do it," Kyou remarked.

 

"That's not what I said at all," he said.

 

"Isn't there anyone confident enough to declare that they can get it?!" Kyou roared, ignoring Okazaki's protest entirely.  He sighed.

 

\----0----

 

"We couldn't decide on a present in the end," lamented Kyou from her seat on a bench outside one of the city's many small parks.  Ultimately she had taken Okazaki's coin and wasted it on one last attempt at the anteater, which had predictably failed.

 

They had dropped in on several other shops afterward, but nothing came of it aside from the ice cream cones they now held.  Kyou took a bite off of the top of her cone as the two girls flanking her on the bench, Fujibayashi and Furukawa, smiled with mild amusement in response.  Kotomi sat on the far right end as Okazaki leaned against the concrete portion of the fence behind the bench beside her.

 

"A contrail," exclaimed Fujibayashi as she glanced up in the distance.  Okazaki glanced too.  "It's very beautiful."  Okazaki raised an eyebrow at that.

 

"Hmm," Okazaki said as he noted Kotomi looking down at the ground sadly out of the corner of his eye.  He turned to regard her morose features and sighed.  It wasn't hard to guess what was probably on her mind.  He patted her on the shoulder comfortingly.  She turned to him with a slightly surprised expression before giving him a smile.

 

\----0----

 

"Our home's this way," Furukawa said.  It was near where Kotomi and Okazaki normally parted ways when they walked together.  Kyou, flanked by Furukawa and Fujibayashi, waved at Okazaki and Kotomi.  They wore smiles that weren't particularly forced.  It wasn't restored yet, but there was less fear present in the group.  It made Okazaki happy to a degree, even if he knew it couldn't last.

 

"...Nagisa chan, Kyou chan, Ryou chan, see you tomorrow," Kotomi replied from Okazaki's side with a wave.

 

"Yes, goodnight," Furukawa replied.

 

"Bye bye," Kyou said in English.

 

They parted ways, the Fujibayashi sisters and Furukawa going toward their homes while Okazaki accompanied Kotomi toward her own home.  He looked over past Kotomi at the plant covered fence around another of the city's small parks.  'There are a lot of parks in this city,' he thought.

 

"...Thank you, Tomoya kun," Kotomi breathed from beside him with a serene smile.

 

"Hmm?  For what?" Okazaki asked.

 

"...If I hadn't met you," she began, "I don't think I would have had so much fun."  He smiled in response to this a little, but sadly.  Soon enough, fun times would end he knew.

 

"I'm glad in that event," he said.  "It's heartening to see."  They were silent for a few seconds as they walked along the park fence.  It wasn't until they reached the end of the fence that Kotomi spoke again.

 

"...Tomoya kun, there's something I want to give you," she remarked, reaching into her purse.

 

"Hmm?" he asked.

 

She pulled out a blue book, the cover well used to the degree where it was impossible to make out the title.

 

Okazaki blinked at it, a shard of memory twisting as he looked at it.

 

"...I want you to hold onto this," she said.  "I've already memorized everything in it."

 

"...I've seen this before, haven't I?" he asked as he took the book gently into his hands.

 

"...I used to read from it to you," she said.  He looked at the spine of the book.  It too was well worn, but he could make out enough of a title to figure out what book it was he held in his hands.

 

"...The worlds of Robert F Young," he read.  "Sixteen stories of science fiction and fantasy."  She nodded happily.  "Is it an original print?"

 

"...No.  It's a reprint from the year two thousand."

 

Okazaki blinked at that.  If it had been one of the original 1965 reprints he wouldn't have been too surprised; the amount of wear and tear on the book was enough to make him believe that it had been around for over 80 years.  However, that it was only 37 years old came as something of a shock to him.

 

"...It's well used."

 

"...I read it a lot."

 

"I believe it."

 

They walked the rest of the way to their normal parting area in a comfortable silence as Okazaki held the book gingerly in his hand.  They parted ways, and he went home to rest.

 

\----0----

 

It started as any normal day might.  Okazaki walked to school warily, images of the town dying haunting his mind as he pressed forward, putting one foot in front of another in the manner of someone unable to cease their march toward certain doom.

 

He would have continued this way all the way to the door of the school if he hadn't seen Kotomi as she tried to sneak up on him from behind.  He also noticed Kyou not far behind, observing with interest.  He turned and looked at her as she neared and took in her surprised and disappointed countenance.

 

"...Oh," Kotomi lamented.

 

"Drat," Kyou said with a disappointed expression as she walked up on the two.

 

"Kotomi chan, hello," he greeted before he turned to Kyou.  "...What were you trying to accomplish?"

 

"Oh, nothing," Kyou said innocently.  He regarded her evenly for a few seconds before shaking his head.  He almost turned to walk on, but movement toward them out of the corner of his eye got his attention.  It was Furukawa, and she looked worried.

 

"Kyou chan!" she cried as she neared.  Her wide, dismayed eyes set off alarm bells in Okazaki's mind.

 

"What's wrong, Furukawa?" he asked as she stopped in front of the group.  She bent down slightly, trying to catch her breath.  He waited patiently.

 

"Kyou chan!" Furukawa gasped to the girl in question.  "Ryou chan comes to school by bus, right?"

 

"Yeah, she does," Kyou admitted.  "So?"

 

"She always gets on the bus around this time, right?" Furukawa went on.

 

"So why are you in such a panic?" Kyou demanded.

 

"There was a bus accident at the intersection below," Furukawa began, which prompted Okazaki to look into the matter himself, "and there was a crowd of people."  Kyou and Kotomi both looked at her with confused expressions as they absorbed the information.  "It looked like a big accident," Furukawa continued after a moment.  "Maybe Ryou chan got..."

 

Kyou gasped at the implication.

 

Reports started filtering back to Okazaki.  There was indeed an accident, and a crowd.

 

"No!  It can't be!" Kyou denied the implication vehemently.  "If anything were to happen to Ryou, there's no way I wouldn't know!"

 

He suspected she was right, remote eyes giving him a view of the situation.  Thermal imagery told him that the bus was empty.  Kyou ran off in the direction of where Furukawa had told her the accident was, followed shortly by a worried Furukawa.

 

Okazaki began to walk in that direction as well, before he noticed that Kotomi was clutching her book bag worriedly behind him with a shudder.  He paused, and turned to regard Kotomi for a moment before walking back to her.  He put a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

 

"I'm sure there's nothing to worry about," he said gently.  Kotomi regarded him for a second and nodded, her worried demeanor unchanged.  Okazaki sighed.  "...Let's go see.  I'm sure she's alright."  He turned to catch up to the others, watching Kotomi follow slowly with a frown until he lost sight of her around a corner.

 

\----0----

 

A familiar blue car sat near a rolled over bus.  The car, a line of smoke trailing out from under its ruined hood, was probably totaled if Okazaki was to guess.  The empty bus lay on its side, and was being examined by firefighters and a couple of paramedics.

 

Another paramedic had been tasked with holding the two drivers apart, the angry driver of the blue car in the same long yellow shirt, black pants, and red rimmed glasses that Okazaki had first seen him in.  The bus driver, a man whose face seemed equally at home with a furious expression, looked ready to punch the slightly shorter man as the car's driver held on to the bus driver's tie.

 

"Holy...!" someone in the crowd exclaimed.  "...I've never seen a bus roll over."

 

"There could be people hurt!" exclaimed another.

 

Kyou gaped at the bus in dismay as Furukawa looked on worriedly.

 

Okazaki noticed out of the corner of his eye the younger Fujibayashi approaching from his right, and tapped Kyou, whom looked about ready to bolt to the bus, on the shoulder.  She blinked and looked at him, then in the direction he was pointing.

 

"Older sister?" Fujibayashi asked gently as she looked at them.

 

"Ryou chan!" Furukawa gasped in surprise.  Kyou bolted to her sister instead with a relieved expression.

 

"You weren't on that bus?" Kyou exclaimed, looking at her sister with relief.

 

"Um," Fujibayashi began, a mixture of surprise, worry, and relief on her face.  "I was on the bus right after that one.  The road got jammed, so I fell behind schedule.  That bus was on its way back to the depot, so no one was on it.  Both the bus driver and the other driver are fine."  Fujibayashi pointed at the two arguing drivers.  "See?"  Furukawa and Kyou looked at the two quarreling men in surprise.

 

Okazaki shook his head.  ‘ _All's well that ends well,’_ he thought.

 

"Thank goodness no one was hurt," Furukawa said with contentment.

 

Kyou breathed a sigh of relief and hugged her sister, who blushed in response.

 

He smiled gently and shook his head.

 

"Big sister!" Fujibayashi exclaimed bashfully.

 

"I'm sorry for making things dramatic," Furukawa admitted to them.

 

Okazaki waved it off with his hand as he noticed Kotomi had finally made it to the site of the accident.  He began to make his way over to her, noting the expression on her face.

 

Worry, blank terror, horror.  He'd seen them often enough, and as he crossed the scant distance to where she was as she dropped her book bag on the ground he suddenly became acutely aware that he shouldn't have left her behind.

 

"Kotomi chan," Furukawa called out glibly.  "Ryou chan's fine."

 

Kotomi's wide eyed, horrified expression was one of someone closed off to the world, the crash site in front of her the entirety of her universe.

 

"Kotomi chan?" Furukawa went on after a moment, confused.

 

"Kotomi chan," Okazaki said as he came to her side.  "It's okay.  No one was on it."  She didn't hear him, her focus entirely on the accident as she fell to her knees.  He placed himself in her field of vision and knelt down in front of her.  "Kotomi chan."

 

Her eyes were unfocused, locked on something only she could see.  She screamed in horror as her tears flowed freely.  She went limp.  His hands darted out to catch her before she could hit the ground.  She curled up into a ball in his arms.  He grit his teeth.  He noticed out of the corner of his eye that the other girls as they ran up to them.

 

"Kotomi chan!" Furukawa exclaimed worriedly.  Okazaki picked Kotomi up and held her to him protectively.

 

"What's wrong, Kotomi?" Kyou asked with worry.

 

"...I think I know what's wrong," Okazaki said tiredly as he stood.

 

"...I'll be a good girl...," sobbed Kotomi to herself.  "I'll be a good girl, so..."

 

Okazaki’s teeth ground against each other has he started walking, then running.  For a moment he didn't know where he going, his lack of attention to the world mirroring that of the girl in his arms.  He considered and then discarded the thought of taking her to a hospital.  There wasn't much they could do for her.  She hiccupped in his arms as she repeated her mantra, and he returned to the world around him.

 

He could see behind him Kyou, Furukawa, and Fujibayashi as they ran after him, their confused, worried expressions disappearing as he rounded a corner.  A burst of realization popped in his head, and suddenly he realized where he needed to go.  He sped onward as he began looking for Kotomi's address mentally, hating the need to go to her house for such reasons.


	13. Melancholy Memories, Part 1

If it weren't for the fact that Okazaki could hear Kotomi breathe, feel her heart beat, he would have thought her dead; she had gone completely limp in his arms.  He sped up.  25 KMH.  30 KMH.  35 KMH.  At those speeds gaining enough traction to round corners became an issue; he compensated with the compressed air thrusters in his legs, shredding the calves of his pants in the process.

 

Unimportant, particularly when compared to the girl in his arms.

 

He reflected though, that his running with her like that explained the one grainy video he'd seen that would prompt his past self to come to the city in the first place.  All he had been able to make out was the uniform--and the improbable speed at which he was moving.

 

He only slowed down as he entered Kotomi's neighborhood to match his surroundings with his maps.  He didn't go into this part of town often.  Simply, those that he would fight with just wouldn't be found there, preferring the poorer sections of town where a couple of young punkish kids would be less likely to have the police called on them.

 

As a consequence, he generally avoided it as well, not looking any less punkish than those he fought most of the time.  He had been there before though, years back.  On thinking about it, the last time he had been there was shortly after he had upgraded himself; he'd marked out a few likely locations for a number of projects and then left.

 

As Kotomi's house fell under his gaze, he realized he'd seen it, too.  It had been better maintained then, and had resembled a house that he used to live in.  As consequence, he had dismissed the odd familiarity he'd felt about it.  The near dramatic irony in dismissing the familiarity like that wasn't lost on him; he'd completely misinterpreted that sensation to Kotomi's detriment.

 

The house itself looked much like the other houses on the block.  Three stories of slightly postmodern architecture with sloped, solar panel covered roofs, appearing to be much like any other newer house in spite of its enhanced size.  By itself it was only vaguely familiar.

 

He paused at the front door as his nanites traced awakening neural pathways.

 

"...No, that's not right," Okazaki said out loud.  ‘ _I...  Didn't use the front door.  It was always the side door because it was never locked.’_

 

He circled around back cautiously, feeling the shard of broken memory tear at his mind as he found himself viewing a familiar but distorted scene.  The meter and a half high fence barred entry to the overgrown side yard.  Lines of plants grew unmolested where his memory told him a bed of flowers and a small garden should have grown.

 

An aluminum patio furniture set lay in disarray.  The white paint he remembered it having, which once made it shine brilliantly in the afternoon sun, was now worn away by the elements leaving only a dreary gray metal finish behind.

 

Grass grew between irregular bricks that once had formed a walkway through the yard.  A water tap with a coil of hose attached to it lay overgrown in the grass.  A small shed with sliding doors completed the look, only partially hidden behind the undergrowth.

 

Okazaki took the barest of moments to reflect on the odd symbolism of the scene, how it mirrored his unintentional neglect of Kotomi, before he jumped over the fence into the yard with a hop.

 

He walked slowly to the back door as his nanites continued to trace his memories while he regarded the yard thoughtfully.  He remembered how he had first arrived now, and why.  He let his mind travel back to that moment as he walked toward the sliding door.

 

\----0----

 

_He had most of what he needed, Okazaki reflected.  Getting everything had taken a minor miracle, on top of what he remembered from ripping other people's minds apart in his past life about going around places unseen.  His...  Father, Naoyuki, had left him to his own devices, preferring to drink away his miseries rather than interfere with Okazaki's plans._

 

_Even as he pitied the man, Okazaki had to admit it was convenient; trying to explain what the contraption of metal piping and components would have been trickier otherwise.  But he needed a micromanipulator if he was to build proper nanites, and he needed proper nanites if he was going to build a mind to machine interface._

 

_All he needed now was proper magnification, but he'd have to find a microsphere superlens for that, and those were mostly relegated to professional laboratories._

 

_He knew scientists sometimes took their work home with them; the more eccentric the scientist the more likely they were to do so.  He also happened to know thanks to the internet that there were a couple of brilliant scientists that happened to live in town, the Ichinoses._

_Though they didn't work in biology or other fields where an optical microscope would come in handy, that didn't necessarily rule them out as candidates to have one._

 

_It was a place to start, anyway, and not having to leave town to pay them a visit made it worth dropping by just in case.  Leaving town alone as someone his apparent age was a risky affair, and the chance to avoid it was welcome.  It wasn't even particularly far from his house either.  Now he just needed an excuse if he was caught snooping._

 

_Some thought later, after a check of his items on hand, Okazaki opted to grab a net and pretend he was after butterflies.  It was a typical 'kid' thing to do, and the net was also the closest thing he had to a toy.  It wasn't an optimal situation, but it would suffice.  As a new morning came, he grabbed the net, set out to the address, and occasionally chased after butterflies that were headed in that general direction._

 

_His subterfuge cost him time, but he found himself there in the early afternoon all the same.  The house he stood in front of was typical of the era except for scale, and Okazaki briefly considered trying the front door before dismissing that as mind numbingly obvious.  He circled around to the side and looked for a possible entry point there._

 

_There was a sliding glass door to the back yard that he thought might be worth looking into, but the fence around the back yard complicated matters; the bars were too close together to slip through, and the top bar too high to jump up and grab.  Not that he hadn't tried of course, pretending he was after a butterfly that flitted into the yard._

 

_He walked around to the front again, considering just taking his chances when he noticed something unusual.  The back yard was fenced in on two sides.  The third side, he'd noticed briefly as he walked around the back, was covered by well-kept shrubbery.  He'd assumed that there was fencing hidden within, but from near the front door he could see a break in the greenery.  Also missing at that point was the expected fencing.  Okazaki walked around for a closer look._

 

_He allowed himself a small smile of victory as he walked into the yard before he did his best 'curious kid' impression and looked around the yard with wide eyes.  It wasn't until he neared the house though that he heard the sound of a violin playing, and he cursed his unaugmented ears mentally._

 

_He felt deaf._

_Blind._

Weak.

 

 _He shook off the sensation and approached the house.  It was a moment before he realized he could see a figure standing behind the sliding glass door.  He couldn't make out what the person was doing through the reflection, and cursed his eyes mentally.  Whomever it was wasn't very big though, no bigger than him in his present form._ 'A child perhaps?' _he thought._ 'If so, no older than this form is.  Curious.' _He drew closer to the glass pane before him, attempting to see what lay beyond._

_The figure was playing a violin.  As he watched she stopped playing the violin, and looked out the window with curiosity at him.  An odd urge to run took hold over him, and he forced it away with irritation.  She opened the door and regarded him bemusedly as she held the violin in front of her._

 

_"Who are you?" she asked.  "Why are you here?"_

_"Eheh, I'm Tomoya," he replied with a sheepish smile.  "Okazaki Tomoya.  I was chasing butterflies."  He paused for a moment in thought.  "Who are you?"_

_"Kotomi," she replied.  "You spell Kotomi with three hiragana.  When you call me, call me Kotomi chan."  Okazaki was surprised when a large figure approached from behind the girl as she spoke, and once again cursed his weak, unaugmented senses._

_"Oh my," the figure said.  Okazaki recognized her as Ichinose Chisato from the pictures he had seen.  "We have a cute guest."_

_"Eheheh," Okazaki laughed slightly and scratched the back of his head in what he hoped was a placating gesture._

 

\----0----

 

"...That answers that," Okazaki said to himself as he gently reached out to open the sliding door while his nanites continued to trace neuron paths in his head.  He moved to open it carefully, trying not to jostle Kotomi around too much.

 

Kotomi, once the precocious child of two scientists, a lonely child that reminded Okazaki too much of his own youth at the time and made him too sympathetic to just leave and not come back when he failed to find any lenses at her house.

 

Kotomi, whom he suspected he had initiated the procedure after learning of her parents' death.

 

Kotomi, whom now lay limply in his arms as the result of a psychotic episode triggered by what surely were memories of losing her parents.  He knew that, at least indirectly, he was partially to blame for that, and shook his head.

 

The sliding door was unlocked.  Okazaki was grateful that it was unlocked, but he found himself slightly disturbed for the same reason; it was his nature to keep a house locked up.  The room he stepped into as he moved the shutter out of the way could have been anyone's living room.  An eclectic set of furniture adorned the room, arranged in a manner vaguely feng shui.

 

He laid Kotomi on the gray sofa that faced the sliding doors and, after a moment's thought, took off the jacket of his school uniform and covered her with it.  He looked around, and then traced a line of dust off of the table to reveal the glass underneath.

 

"...What are you doing here?" Kotomi asked groggily as she pegged him with a blank, confused look.

 

"Kotomi chan," Okazaki began as he turned to her with a raised eyebrow.  "You had me worried there.  Sorry for intruding, I couldn't think of anywhere else to bring you."  She was silent, so he continued.  "You suffered...  Some sort of breakdown.  Do you remember?"

 

"...Yes.  I thought Ryou chan had..."  She stopped, unable to bring herself to say it.

 

"She's fine,” he said reassuringly.  “It was an empty bus."

 

"...I'm glad," Kotomi said.  There was a comfortable silence, and Okazaki sat down on the floor gingerly.

 

"...I'm starting to remember things," he admitted.  "Seeing your house...  Mainly seeing the back yard...  It was enough to trigger some memories.  I think I remember everything, up to a point at least."  Kotomi looked at him for a moment with an unreadable expression before looking down.

 

"...I'm sorry I didn't let you come earlier," she admitted in return.  "I was ashamed.  There was...  Something I didn't want you to see here."

 

"The yard?  If it's that..."

 

"...No.  It's not that..."

 

"Then what..." he began, then silenced himself.  "...Never mind.  If you don't want to tell me..."

 

"...Did you know that I've been offered scholarships for a number of American colleges?" she asked.

 

Alarm bells rang in Okazaki's head.

 

"...I'm not surprised," he said.

 

"...I'm going to take the offer," she said sadly, and Okazaki balked, silencing himself before he could yell at her not to.  Going to America in the near future would be effectively a death sentence, thanks to his past self.  He didn't think he could bear to see her die like that.

 

"...I must advise, very strongly, against doing that," he stated finally.

 

Kotomi was silent for a few seconds before she took Okazaki's coat off herself slowly and stood up.  Okazaki watched her as she walked out of the room before he stood up to follow.  She ascended a flight of stairs, and Okazaki dutifully followed.  Another flight of stairs passed under their feet.

 

The stairs terminated at the end of a hallway, which itself stopped four meters away from the end.  There were two doors on the right, which Okazaki remembered led to a bedroom and a bathroom.  One door on the left led to the house's master bedroom.  And at the end of the hall was one door, which Kotomi stopped in front of.

 

It was the study, where the Ichinoses did most of their writing.  He'd snuck in there once, under the pretense of needing to use the restroom, and had marveled at the view it gave of the surrounding neighborhood after a cursory examination told him it wouldn't have what he had needed.

 

"...You followed," Kotomi said.

 

"I'm not going to leave you alone," Okazaki replied.  "Not again."

 

She looked at him with sad eyes.  "...I can't trust that," she said.  "I know you had an accident.  What's to say you won't have another?"

 

Okazaki sighed.

 

"...I don't think I could take that," she said.  "I don't think I could lose someone again."

 

"You don't have to worry about that," he replied.  "Not now.  I have...  Transcended that weakness now."

 

"...I want to believe that, but..." Kotomi turned the handle and stepped inside.

 

Okazaki followed.

 

The room wore newspaper clippings like a madman's wallpaper; a forest of newsprint swayed slightly in the breeze from the open door.  Articles adorned the floor like decorative tiles, and a few even hung from the ceiling like bats, ready to leap and shriek unwelcome truths at any interloper that disturbed their slumber.

 

He stepped carefully, doing his best to step between the articles that matted the floor.  The sources of the articles varied.  Some were obviously newsprint; detailing new works by the Ichinoses or their untimely demise, while others appeared to be clipped from books, explaining the specifics of a principle the Ichinoses had uncovered.  There were even a few articles that appeared to be printouts from papers that referenced the work of the Ichinoses.

 

The only uniting theme was that each article had in some way touched upon Kotomi's parents.

 

"...When you came to the library, I was really happy," she began as she sat down amongst the articles, as though drawing strength from their presence.  "I was happy to see that the boy from those days had come back to me."  She looked down at the papers in front of her.  "But then you told me that you didn't remember.  That you had an accident.

 

"I thought that would be alright.  You still became friends with me again.  You treated me kindly, as though you had never forgotten in the first place.  You did your best to help me make friends."  Her shoulders sagged.  "But I started to worry, just a little.  What if you had another accident?  What if you forgot me again?  Or worse..."

 

"I'm incapable of forgetting you now," he said as he walked over to sit beside her slowly.  "That which caused the accident also ensured that I wouldn't forget anything afterward."

 

"...Even if that is true..." she began, looking down at the articles.  He was silent as she gathered her thoughts.  "Did you know that until you showed up here, that my house, the yard, Father, and Mother...  They were my entire world?  Until you came, there was nothing beyond them."

 

He had gotten the impression, but he said nothing as he grit his teeth.  ‘ _How profound the effects we have on people sometimes, without even trying,’_ he thought.

 

"I was alone at school," she continued, "because I read books my classmates wouldn't and thought of things they wouldn't.  But this boy, Okazaki Tomoya, seemed so different from the boys I knew at my school.  For once there was someone my age that understood what I read, comprehended what I thought."

 

He frowned at that.  He'd been precocious as a child himself, but when he was genuinely that age, he wasn't sure if he'd have genuinely followed what she talked about so well.  Hard though it still was for him to admit, Kotomi was probably still smarter than he was, in a lot of ways.  His sole advantage was a wealth of remembered knowledge, not all of it his own.

 

She was silent for a long moment before she spoke again.

 

"...As my birthday neared, I asked Father and Mother for a teddy bear," she said.  "Not because I particularly wanted it...  Just because it was what would be normal.  They said they would, but..."  She sighed and wiped a tear away.  "My Father and Mother...  They had to go to a conference.  It was supposed to be after my birthday, but the schedule was changed."

 

Okazaki laid a hand on Kotomi's shoulder gently.  She let it remain for a moment before pulling herself away slightly.  He sighed.

 

"...I told them I hated them," she said.  "Hated them for lying.  Hated them for not being able to come to my birthday party.  Those were my last words to them.  'I hate you.'  And then..."

 

He waited for her to continue.  ‘ _Isn't it always something like that?  You say something you didn't mean, and next thing you know, there's no way to take it back.’_

 

"...Nobody came for my birthday," she continued.  "The housemaid got sick, too, so I was alone.  And, Tomoya kun didn't show up, either."

 

He frowned.  "...I don't remember that," he admitted.  "I've been trying, but it's part of what's still gone."  He sighed and stroked his chin thoughtfully.  "I thought that there would be one key memory that would unlock everything, but it's all coming piecemeal."  He sighed again.  "I'm guessing it wasn't long after this that Yonai told you about your parents and you burnt the paper?"

 

She nodded.  "...He explained everything to me.  How the plane Father and Mother were on malfunctioned in midair and sank into a faraway ocean.  How a very important paper sank with them.  How there might be a spare copy in Father's study.  How important the paper was to the world, and therefore, how it had to be found.  This person had to be a bad person.  He was here to take away something important of Father's."

 

Okazaki held in a sigh.  Until now, he hadn't had true proof that Yonai hadn't managed to fool him with an exquisitely crafted lie.  Mentally, he called off the fragments of himself that had been tailing Yonai ever since he learned of him.

 

"That was what I had thought," Kotomi said.  "I begged God to bring them back.  I thought, if I was a good girl, they would come back.  I thought that maybe they were still in the house, just hiding.  I looked in every room for them, kept expecting them to be just around the corner.  I looked everywhere, but they weren't there.

 

"Father's study was the last place I went into.  I was always told not to, but that was the only place left to search.  There was an envelope on the desk...  I figured that had to be the important paper the bad guy was talking about.  I betted this was what had caused Father and Mother to disappear.  It was wrong for something like this to be so important.  I didn't care about the world.  All I wanted were Father and Mother.

 

"So I burnt it.  I burnt the paper that Father and Mother had worked so hard on.  The paper that Father and Mother had left me for."

 

Okazaki sighed.

 

"Are you trying to recreate the paper," he gestured at the clippings, "with all of this?"

 

"...I think I started this as a way of atoning for my sin," she admitted.  "I started to collect scraps of all the newspaper articles that talked about Father and Mother.  But that didn't feel enough to me, so I began collecting pages from books that mentioned them.  Then, I studied a lot...  Because I wanted to follow in the footsteps of Father and Mother.

 

"Father and Mother were trying to express the foundation of this world using the most beautiful words.  It's something that must be told to everyone in the world.  It's something nobody else can copy."  She smiled sadly.  "Not even me.  But if I don't do it...  God won't forgive me for burning the paper."  She teared up, and he couldn't resist pulling her into a hug.

 

"Kotomi chan..." he began.

 

"...I don't want to experience anything that sad again," she said and pushed him away.

 

"You don't have to," he said, holding onto her shoulders gently.  "I'll do everything I can to see that you don't."  He sighed.  "But Kotomi chan...  The paper..."  He ground his teeth slightly.  "I spoke to Yonai.  I should have told you sooner.  Kotomi chan...  The paper you burnt...  It wasn't the paper they were working on."  Kotomi blinked and looked at him in confusion.  "It was...  It was a catalog.  For teddy bears."

 

She blinked again, a multitude of emotions running across her face.  Confusion.  Sadness.  Regret.  Even small amounts of relief and happiness.  She seemed to sink in on herself again, hugging her knees to herself.

 

"...Please leave now," she said finally.  "I need to think about this."

 

"...Alright," Okazaki said at last.  "I'm going to call the school and let them know what happened, alright?"  She made no reply, so he made his way downstairs carefully.

 

True to his word, he called the school and explained the basics of what happened, and found himself surprised when the woman he talked to began asking about details that someone whom wasn't privy to what had happened to Kotomi wouldn't ask.  Had her godfather been informed yet?  Did he know anything about her past?  Did he think it was related to her issues surrounding the crash?

 

He did his best to explain things more thoroughly before hanging up thoughtfully and leaving the house by the back yard door.  He sat on the weed encrusted steps and reached down to play with one of the weeds idly as he thought.  Slowly, he pulled the weed out from its place of growth, taking note of the root structure as he did so.

 

He regarded it for a moment before discarding it and reaching for another.  And another.  And another.  Without quite realizing it, he had sped up his pace, going from mechanically slow to normal human speed to mechanically fast.  Soon, an entire patch an arm length away from him had been cleared of all plant life.

 

Earth parted like water under his touch.  Whole clusters of plants were ripped from the earth, and carefully cleaned of dirt.  Okazaki was careful not to leave any root that could regrow remain.  He tossed the cleansed weeds into a pile by the doorstep.  He stood and moved, soon clearing another square meter of yard of life.

 

The weed pile grew, and Okazaki moved them to the side of the shed before returning to his impromptu task.  With the speed and strength of machinery at his fingertips, he found that the task was done relatively quickly; a scant few hours to completely clear an entire yard of all plant life, save for the shrubbery and the single tree that grew near the shed.

 

The pile of weeds stacked near the shed was enormous, but the original layout of the yard was clear to see.  Okazaki blinked.

 

"What...?" he asked himself, confused.  "What possessed me to do that?  I knew I had obsessive compulsive tendencies, but..."  He shook his head in confusion and looked out at the yard.  With some plant seeds and a little time, it would almost be back to what it had been from his first memories of the place.

 

How he had gotten here though...

 

He felt the action wasn't completely his own.  It was almost as if some of his internal tendencies had been amplified somehow, for just a short time.  The sensation disturbed him; he was used to being in better control of himself than that.  As he reflected on it, it reminded him of a lot of his interactions with Kotomi; bursts of emotion, amplified.

 

 _‘What is done was done,’_ he reflected as he looked at the yard.  He had no choice now but to see it through.  He would need a few items for that though.  He checked his internal clock.  School let out a few minutes ago.  He rubbed the dirt off his hands and looked down at himself.

 

"...It's just as well that I was going to have to get new pants anyway," he noted the level of dirt and chlorophyll that encrusted his clothing.

 

Movement near the house drew his attention.  He looked over and noticed Kyou as she stood near the house, an amused smirk on her face as she looked at him, flanked by both her sister and Furukawa.

 

"You look like Botan after she's been playing," Kyou said wryly.

 

Okazaki affected a noble frown with closed eyes and tilted his head to the skies above.  "This only goes to show how noble the boar is," he said, putting a hand above his heart.

 

"Or how piggish the Okazaki is," Kyou replied with a smirk.

 

"Hey now," Okazaki said with half a grin as he looked down to her, "I resemble that remark."  Beside her, Furukawa and Fujibayashi tittered at the play by play.  It was good to see them feeling more comfortable around him now.  Kyou's face grew serious however.

 

"So what happened this morning?" she asked, all traces of amusement gone from her face.  Furukawa and Fujibayashi looked at him in turn with worried expressions.  Okazaki sighed and frowned.

 

"...I'm not sure I should be the one to say," he admitted.  "To make a long story short...  Kotomi was reminded of something traumatic and..."

 

"And suffered a breakdown," Kyou replied.

 

He sighed.  "...Not how I would have put it.  But, essentially."

 

"Is she going to be okay?" Furukawa asked.

 

"...I can't say for sure," he admitted.  "Only time will tell."

 

"We were all worried," Furukawa continued with quietly as she looked down to the ground.

 

"Kotomi chan thought I got hurt," Fujibayashi began, "so she fell in a state of shock..."

 

"It's my fault," Furukawa stated.  "If I hadn't said there was an accident..."

 

"...Then something else would surely have triggered this eventually," he noted.  "It's... better for these things to be aired out sooner."  They all fell silent.

 

"...So why are you doing an impression of a farmer?" Kyou asked at last.

 

"...Honestly, I don't know.  I just...  Felt compelled, somehow.  Although..."  He began thinking.  There was a chance that seeing things as they had been in the past could be helpful for Kotomi.  He had to wonder if maybe some subconscious part of him had realized that and driven him to such actions.  "...Maybe if I make things how they used to be, maybe it'll be helpful for Kotomi."

 

"How they used to be...?" Kyou asked.

 

"...Er," he began.

 

"What are you hiding, Okazaki?" Kyou pressed on with a raised eyebrow.

 

"...I knew Kotomi as a child," Okazaki admitted.  "Had an accident though, so I forgot about it until I met her again."

 

"...You know, that explains a few things," Kyou admitted.

 

"Well, keep them to yourself," he replied.

 

"Fine, fine," she said and waved her hand dismissively.  "I have an idea anyway."

 

"...You having an idea worries me," he deadpanned.

 

"Good," Kyou observed with a smirk before donning a more serious expression.  "...Keep an eye on Kotomi, alright?"

 

"I'll do my best," he replied solemnly.

 

Kyou nodded.  "Good," she said, before walking away.  "Try not to get in any fights with a corn field," she snarked behind her.

 

"I'll be sure to stick an ear in your ear," he retorted, sad that the pun didn't translate well to Japanese and wasn't very good in English either.  Kyou waved it off behind her.  Furukawa and Fujibayashi bowed and followed Kyou.  Okazaki shook his head and watched them go before leaving to head to his own home.


	14. Melancholy Memories, Part 2

As he approached his house, Okazaki realized something was amiss.  The faint smell of sewage was present, but underlying that was another smell; one he could only tell was there thanks to his augmented nose.  Taken together, it was the smell of recent death.  He blinked apprehensively, and turned on his thermal imagery to look inside.

 

There were no heat sources present, but there were heat shadows.  One, swinging slightly side to side, was about the right size for an adult Japanese male.

 

He reached for the door numbly and opened it.  Okazaki Naoyuki, father of Okazaki Tomoya, hung suspended from the ceiling light, electrical cord wrapped tightly about his neck.  The inevitable aftereffects pooled under his feet, near a toppled stepladder, doubtless the instrument he used to perform his act.  Okazaki judged from the bloating and the temperature in the room that Naoyuki had hung himself about seven hours before; not long after Okazaki had left that morning.

 

He closed the door silently behind him and considered his options.  It was theoretically possible to bring him back; assuming there wasn't much brain damage, having nanites read the position of his neurons and cloning a body for him wouldn't be entirely out of the question.  It was probably too late for that however; decomposition was already hard at work, and the brain cells had been dead for hours by that point.

 

And then there was the manner by which Naoyuki had died.  Naoyuki had been miserable.  He'd dealt with his wife, Toshie, dying, which he knew on its own was bad enough.  Then he had to deal with his son not really being his son, but rather some strange person inhabiting the body.  His last link to his deceased wife wasn't actually a link at all.  Thinking back on it, he was surprised Naoyuki hadn't really tried to kill him.

 

He shrugged off the thoughts and regarded Naoyuki with slumped shoulders.  While he could take solace that Naoyuki managed to die relatively cleanly and was no longer suffering, the fact that he had been moved to the point where suicide seemed like a viable option depressed Okazaki.  He sat down near the door and pondered what to make of the situation, idly giving the room a once over.

 

There was a lone piece of paper, out of place, sitting on the computer desk.  He blinked and got up to examine the paper.  He quickly realized it was a suicide note, written by Naoyuki.

 

_"Tomoya kun,_

_“If you are reading this, then I have found the courage to follow through and rid myself of misery.  Ever since Toshie died and I found out you were not truly my son, just some strange person inhabiting the body, I have considered taking this final act.  I held back because you were still considered a child, if only in form._

_"You are quite fond of saying that 'old habits die hard'.  As you grew, I found that living had become nothing more than its own old habit as well.  Nothing would deaden the pain, even as I turned to harder and harder liquor, and other ways of forgetting.  I was ashamed to admit that I had been turning to drugs as well, and so I did my best to hide it from you._

_"I only realized after my syringe went missing that you must have found out.  It was enough to snap me out of the haze I have been living all these years, watching something that is not my son grow in the body of that which should have been my family._

_"You don't need me anymore.  I don't think you ever did.  I was just fooling myself, clinging to life for no good reason at all.  I think that now is an appropriate time to go.  I'm sorry I've been such a problem for you.  I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.  Now, I will trouble you no more.  Now, I can rest.  -Naoyuki"_

 

Okazaki stared at the note for a few moments after reading it before putting it in his pocket.  Somehow he felt he should be a little offended.  He couldn't feel much of anything though, emotions tapped to their limit for the day.

 

Numbly, he called the police department to report the suicide and sat down in the living room near the door.

 

The police arrived.  Questions were asked.  The body was taken.  Okazaki declined coming with them, stating that he had to clean the place up.  They insisted he leave the cleaning to their investigator team.  He shrugged, and gave them the note and the syringe he had run tests on.  He waited thoughtfully for the investigation team, and contemplated the stench that permeated the air.

 

A part of him reflected that dying in such a manner resulted in a somewhat different set of smells than he was normally used to, and he dismissed it with numb irritation, trying to observe a respectful moment of silence for the departed.

 

The investigation team arrived and began taking photos of the scene.  Okazaki stepped outside while they worked, and sat on the front step, letting the hours wash over him.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki sat on the edge of his bed after the team left.  He took a moment to mentally review finances; there was enough money to pay rent and certain utilities in his father's account until it ceased to matter.  He decided to cancel the utilities in favor of providing power and other necessities through his own means.

 

Naoyuki's death brought to mind his original parents, from his past life.  He hadn't gotten along with his father.  He had almost come to blows with him more than once.  It had been a relief when his dad had finally left the household for good after the divorce was finalized.

 

For a long time, he had blamed his father for the way his life had gone.  He was kept indoors and away from others during his formative years.  His father had kept his past self from developing normally and learning how to properly interact with other people.

 

It could have been interpreted as fear for his safety, which was a part of it, but mostly his father just didn't want to go out and keep an eye on him while he played outside.

 

His mother had been powerless to help; with her being the only person in the house employed.  She was only ever able to take him places on her days off.  It hadn't been enough; he had still turned out different from the others.  And kids had a way of picking out the different and heaping torments upon them.

 

He'd been saved much of the physical aspect of it, by his own aggressive behavior and lack of a self-preservation instinct, but he still was forced to endure insults and barbs from his peers.  Sarcasm became familiar to him, first a defense to their remarks, then a critical aspect of his personality.

 

When his father had finally passed away, he hadn't particularly cared.  He still blamed him for many of his problems; even though he knew intellectually that equally many, if not more, stemmed from his own actions.

 

His mother, on the other hand...

 

He had continued to live with his mother for a long time.  She actually owned the house, which made staying there the smartest option in a steadily crumbling world economy.  He probably would have stayed either way though.

 

She took care of him without complaint as he went to college.  She was there for him as he found himself forced from his dream careers.  She continued to be there for him when he was forced to take a last career path he thought he would be good at even if he wouldn’t enjoy it.  She was still there for him when he found he wasn’t good at that either, and dropped out to get a regular job.

 

College left him with crippling debts that he was hard pressed to pay off, and little to see for it.  It had also been during his time at college that he swore an oath to remain alone.  After briefly courting a girl whom he realized was excessively kind, particularly compared to his sometimes barbaric, blood lusting ways, he found that he couldn't bring himself to even consider corrupting that with his presence.

 

It had been enough to kill his hopes for the future, and he grew even surlier as a result.  Still his mother didn't seem to care, even as he was at his worst.  Through it all she had stood supportively where no one else could.  When she too had passed away, he'd found himself devastated, feeling adrift.

 

He was able to keep it from interfering much with his work, long practice of suppressing his emotions coming into play, but it was obvious even to himself that he was just going through the motions.  He suspected he would have ultimately killed himself, but, then came the offer asking for human test subjects for a new biomechanical interface...

 

He wondered for a moment how it must have been for Kotomi to learn that her parents had died, and felt a wrenching on the last shard of memories he hadn't recovered.  He started tracing paths with his nanites, focusing on that thought.  Hopefully, it would finally resolve all of his missing memory issues once and for all.

 

\----0----

 

_It had taken a considerable amount of luck on his part, but he had finally found a proper microsphere superlens.  Ironically, it had even come from in the city; the now familiar Hikarizaka Private High School had received a shipment of upgraded microscopes for its biology classes._

_He doubted that such an event could have occurred anywhere else.  But the proximity to Riken, having advanced tools to teach local students from a relatively early age advanced scientific methodology, would be a boon to the research facility._

_He snuck in to liberate one of their new microscopes of its lens.  It was a trivial matter, particularly as he did so during the dead of night when no one was around._

_He managed to accidentally wreck the first one in his attempt to prize it from its mount, but he was able to snag one off a second microscope._

_It was a pity, but he did what he had to do._

_It had taken him the better part of a day to build a proper mounting for the lens in his micromanipulator, and a few more days of painstaking measuring and calculating to properly calibrate the scope._

_By the end of it, however, he had a working micromanipulator, sufficient materials to build an army of nanites, a nanite controlling program he'd input into the computer from memory over the course of several weeks with near constant typing, and a microwave emitter to both power and give them direction._

_The hardest part was building at least two nanites from memory. It had taken him another couple of weeks of false starts and accidentally breaking nanometer scale parts, but had resulted in two builder nanites that actually worked like they were supposed to._

_His work there was done; they would whip out millions of nanites and a small-scale nanite controller for implantation without further input from him aside from base materials.  All through the process, he took the time to visit Kotomi._

_The little girl always managing to surprise him in some way or another.  She was much, much smarter than he had been at that age, and he could only keep up with her thanks to his wealth of comparative experience.  He had to admit he was a bit jealous of that, but dismissed it._

_They shared the same problem.  Like him, she was unable to relate to her less intelligent peers, and found herself isolated in spite of the encouragement of her parents.  He did the only thing he felt he could, and became her friend.  As such, he had agreed to attend her birthday party later in the week.  He admitted he couldn't bring any friends, having not really made any himself, but he promised he’d be there._

_Okazaki didn't have a present for the girl.  He'd have gotten her a book, but she had everything he could easily pick up locally, and Naoyuki...  Wasn't particularly receptive to his entreaties to aid him.  Not that Okazaki couldn't understand why, but it was still frustrating._

_He lamented, and hoped it didn't put a damper on the party mood.  He would hate for it to end up like one of his childhood birthdays, where things turned to shit thanks to high expectations on his part._

_Days passed, and the nanites finished their slow work.  They could build about anything, but their small size prevented them from performing fast construction._

_Traditional manufacturing lines might have been able to accomplish the task considerably faster, and he would in time make some manufacturing lines, but he didn't have to the tools to make those yet.  The nanite microcontroller was just a start._

_He'd install it after the party, and see about making her a belated present of some sort.  Perhaps a model of H. G. Wells' time machine.  He dressed and prepared to leave the house; if he had left thirty seconds sooner, he would have been on his way._

_"The crash occurred as they were flying to the United States for a special conference," he heard, Naoyuki having left the television on as he slept off the effects of an empty sake bottle, "having advanced their schedule."_

_Okazaki blinked and turned to regard the television.  He'd heard the Ichinoses talking about attending a conference during the time he had spent at their home._

_"A search party has already been sent out," the television continued.  "However, judging from the site of the crash, the chances of survival for the missing people are slim."_

_He made his way to the computer, did a quick search, and discovered his suspicions confirmed.  The Ichinoses had been amongst the passengers of the downed jet._

_He ground his teeth together.  Something like that would naturally have to fall on Kotomi's birthday, of all days.  He opted to make a slight delay; implantation wouldn't take too long.  It would be a much grander present to her if he could get everything set up in time to bring back her parents.  If nothing else, he could act as a surrogate parent for her this way; he could leave a form there to watch over her._

_The implantation rig had been the other thing he had set up.  It was fairly simple really; it'd just pierce the top of his head with a sterilized knife, insert the nanite microcontroller in between the hemispheres of his brain near the corpus callosum, and let the nanites do their work unpacking the controller to the various reaches of his brain.  He'd done it a million times before, quite literally in fact.  It was almost an afterthought compared to the trials of setting up a nanite prototyping machine._

_There was pain as the knife pierced through the top of his skull where it was weakest.  He dutifully ignored it, even as it scraped away the bone to widen the hole enough for both the controller and the manipulator arms to fit inside.  Compared to what he had done to himself in his past life, the relatively mild pain hardly fazed him in spite of a lack of anesthetics._

_He felt the device slip into the incision, then felt the manipulator moving against his scalp as it made sure the controller was in the proper location._

_He couldn't feel the device itself of course, but he knew what was happening.  He'd programmed the manipulator arm to perform the simple procedure after all.  The manipulator arm retracted and the computer beeped, ready.  The device was going active.  He blinked, his vision going briefly fuzzy._   ‘That didn't happen before.  Wait, something’s-‘

 

_He suffered a brief seizure, and almost a year's worth of his memories died._

 

\----0----

 

_It wouldn't be until the following morning before Okazaki woke up, a bit confused.  Confusion turned to worry as he noted his present state.  He hadn't been nearly this far along last time he'd checked.  What had gone wrong?  He could 'feel' the connection with the controller easily enough; it had installed properly.  But what had happened?_

_He commanded the nanites that swirled around in his head to see what damage there was to his brain.  They told him that there was wide scale burn damage in portions of his brain covering long term memory.  It was worrying; he had no idea how something like that could have happened.  He set the nanites to check the device itself for damage as he checked the date._

_Almost a year's worth of memories were gone.  On the plus side, his nanites checked out the device as being functional; which meant that short of suddenly being shot in the face he wouldn't have any further issues with memory loss, and after he had built some backup brains, even that would cease to be an issue._

_He worried only a little about how much he had missed.  It probably hadn't been much, he decided; if he was going to be caught stealing equipment, he would have already been caught._

_And from a social perspective, he didn't really expect to have missed anything.  He would have to see if anyone approached him in school in a 'we're friends' fashion or dropped by the house, though he rather doubted the prospect.  He had tried making friends with some of the children around him, but being reborn as he had, he was rather intimidating to the other students sometimes._

_He stayed home for a few days and slept to allow his brain recover naturally before he moved onto the next stage.  Naoyuki called him in sick at his request, to his surprise; the man generally wasn’t receptive to entreaties for help.  He wondered if something had changed, but didn’t think too hard about it._

_By the time he felt he had fully recovered, news about the Ichinose's plane crash had practically dried up._

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki ground his teeth.  He knew now what had happened; there were no anomalous gaps left in his memory, just a deep, abiding sadness at how things had went awry.  The road to hell was paved with good intentions, so it was said.  He sat on the edge of his bed for a few minutes more and let his melancholy thoughts stew before he stood up.

 

What was done was done.  There was only one way to go, and that was forward.  That would have to be the next day however; the hour was growing late.  Okazaki shed his ruined school uniform and lay down to rest for the night.

 

The following morning, he dressed and retrieved a stack of counterfeit money from his desk.  It was easier to make that rather than gardening supplies, and he needed some yard supplies if he was going to finish his impromptu mission.  He stuffed the money in his pocket and left the house, a certain numbness taking hold as he traversed the city.

 

Even the normal waking nightmare of seeing the city destroyed in his memories fled the outwardly staring abyss in his mind.

 

He walked, winding his way to the only real hardware store in town, a Home Center.  Grass seed, flower bulbs, fertilizer, a can of white paint, some garbage bags, and a paintbrush were dutifully purchased, and Okazaki stepped outside with the load slung over his shoulder.  He then made his way to Kotomi's house, not giving himself time to think about anything other than what he was doing.

 

Bagging up the debris he had left went quicker than making the pile, and he tossed them in the accepted receptacle.  He took a few minutes to prune the shrubbery and the tree.  A short knife popped out of his finger, when accompanied by his mechanical strength it made short work of even thick branches.

 

The skin of his fingers was less resistant than the plants however, and he ended up cutting his fingertips with his own blade repeatedly and stained many of the branch ends with trace amounts of blood.  He ignored the pain in his fingers and continued, trusting his nanites to heal up the wounds when he finished.

 

He spent a few more minutes pushing loose nails in the shed back into place with his undamaged fingers as he let the nanites heal the damage he had done to himself.  Planting the grass seed went quickly.  The flower bulbs took slightly longer, but only because they required a measure of care in their planting.  He opted to water the yard before he painted the patio furniture.

 

However, his attempt to water the soil gave rise to another problem.  When he turned on the water, the hose itself split lengthwise badly enough that he would have better luck with the hose unattached.  He sighed and tossed the rotten hose in another trash bag.  He then rinsed his hands off with the tap and retraced his steps to the Home center to get a new hose.

 

The cashier was the same one he dealt with earlier, and he gave Okazaki a slightly condescending smile before sinking in on himself and looking away with a slight shiver after Okazaki locked eyes with him.  He left the store with the hose around his shoulder and started to walk toward Kotomi's house once more.

 

Three familiar faces stood out from across the street at the crosswalk.  Kyou led her sister and Furukawa along, the latter of which holding a familiar violin case.  He raised an eyebrow and began moving to the crosswalk to see what they were doing.

 

As they walked into the crosswalk, a man on a black scooter sped past them, almost hitting them.  Furukawa lost her grip on the violin case with a gasp as she tumbled backward.

 

The violin popped out of the poorly secured case.  It bounced behind the trio.  Fujibayashi, unbalanced by the scooter's close pass, also fell backwards.

 

Her hand smashed down through the instrument's delicate neck.

 

"Hey!" yelled Kyou at the rider of the scooter, infuriated.  Furukawa and Fujibayashi looked at the broken instrument between them, eyes wide with shock.  Okazaki let out a long sigh at the scene and continued his way toward the trio as Kyou hurled expletives at the departed rider.

 

"This doesn't appear to be good," he said as he approached them.

 

"I should-" Kyou ceased her ineffectual yelling to regard Okazaki with an eyebrow raised in confusion.  "Huh?  What are you doing here?"

 

"Shopping," he said.  "Is that the violin from the music club?"  He pointed between Furukawa and Fujibayashi as the former of the two picked up the severed pegbox with a dejected sigh.

 

"Huh?"  Kyou looked down at the scene behind her.

 

"Oh sister," Fujibayashi lamented, "I broke it!"

 

"On accident as the result of the scooter rider's carelessness," he observed as he walked over to the damaged instrument.  He reached out to the pegbox in Furukawa's hands.  "May I?"

 

"Um, sure Okazaki?" Furukawa gave him the violin's end with confusion.

 

He took it, and then reached down to pick up the rest of the violin too.

 

"What are you going to do with it?" Fujibayashi asked.

 

"I'll fix it," he replied.  Furukawa and Fujibayashi looked at each other.  Kyou regarded Okazaki with a raised eyebrow.

 

"Hey Tomoya," Kyou asked, "is something wrong?"

 

"...Naoyuki's dead," he replied, which elicited a gasp from Fujibayashi.  "He killed himself, yesterday."

 

"...I'm sorry," Kyou said at last.  Okazaki sighed.

 

"It's alright," he began, but was interrupted by the sound of a car horn.  He looked over at the car in question and realized they were still on the crosswalk.  "Er, let's move."

 

Furukawa grabbed the violin case and moved to the sidewalk with everyone else.  He ducked down to pick up a few wood chunks from the violin's damaged neck as he moved with them.

 

"...So he finally did it, huh?" Kyou remarked at last.  Okazaki nodded.

 

"It was just too much for him, I think," he said.  "I'm glad he's at peace now, but..."  He trailed off.

 

"Yeah," Kyou agreed.

 

"I wish there was something I could have done for him.  Someone shouldn't have to suffer that much."  He snorted.  "Of course, I was part of the problem, so there wasn't much I could do."

 

"You never did explain that one to me," Kyou noted and looked at Okazaki with slightly narrowed, critical eyes.

 

"That'll come along with a great number of other explanations," he said.

 

"Hmph," snorted Kyou as she crossed her arms.

 

"Anyway," he went on, "why did you have the violin with you?"

 

"We meant to give it as a present to Kotomi," Kyou admitted.

 

"...We contacted the upperclassman who left the violin behind, and we officially received ownership," Fujibayashi said quietly.

 

"After talking to Nishina san," Furukawa began, "she said it should be properly tuned, so we were on our way with it to an instrument shop."  She looked down sadly.

 

"But then an idiot on a scooter almost runs you down and the violin gets broken in the shuffle," he observed as he looked at the remains of the violin in his hands.  "Well, don't worry about it.  Give me a day or so and I'll have it like new.  Or at least, like it was before it got broken."

 

"You can do that?" Furukawa asked.

 

"Oh yeah," Kyou said for him airily.  "Tomoya has a long history of fixing things.  Books, headphones, pipes, chains...  Seriously Tomoya, how do you do that?"

 

"Trade secret," he said as he allowed himself a small smile in spite of himself.  "Anyway, if you'll drop by my house in the evening day after tomorrow, I should have it done by then."

 

"Perfect," Kyou said.  "You're a life saver."

 

Okazaki managed to keep his face from twitching at that sentiment.

 

"Not a problem," he said.

 

\----0----

 

They parted ways shortly after, and Okazaki took the violin home.  He placed it on his desk before returning to Kotomi's house to water the lawn.  With a proper hose, the task was finished quickly, and he sprayed off the patio furniture to make sure it was clean enough for painting.

 

He used the sleeves of his shirt to remove more stubborn dirt before he let it dry in the afternoon sun and set about cleaning the stones of the yard, which didn’t take long.  Okazaki then watched the set dry patiently before he rolled up his sleeves and began painting it.

 

He left the legs of the set for later and set the furniture in the middle of the yard to dry before he headed home for the night, giving Kotomi's house one last look before he departed.

 

When he returned home he found a number of messages on the answering machine.  Among them was a call from the police; they wanted to ask him more questions about Naoyuki's death.

 

He returned the call.  Yes, he knew that Naoyuki was doing illegal drugs, or at least he had known for a couple days.  No, he hadn't been attempting to hide that from them, but he had been trying to figure out what he should do about the situation.  No, he didn't know that someone had tested the syringe, or that it looked like someone had drawn blood from Naoyuki's body recently.

 

And so on.  Eventually the officer talking to him had thanked him for his time and hung up, leaving Okazaki alone in his thoughts.  He turned in for the night not much later.

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A note from the author:**

 

So…  Yeah.  Naoyuki’s dead, baby.  Made me have to jump up to an ‘M’ rating, unfortunately.  Well, such is life.  Or death, as the case may be.

 

I’d like to take a moment to thank a few people.  ReadingBlueWolf for beta’ing this chapter and the last, Tune4Toons for beta’ing chapter 3 and giving me general pointers, Darkin520 for moral support and poker, and Sierraoscar154 and IrishPanther (and ReadingBlueWolf and Darkin520, again (with poker)) for being loyal readers.

 

I’d also like to thank anyone that got this far with this story but didn’t review.  You’re awesome too.  Just, not as awesome as the people that did review.  :)

 

Now, I don’t know when the next chapter will be released.  Things are really only getting busier, and I got lucky with time to get this guy out.  Realistically, I don’t see the next one being out until sometime during winter break.  Could get surprised and get something out sooner, but…  Yeah, don’t hold me to that, seriously.

 

That said, don’t worry that I’ll leave you guys hanging.  I have everything mapped out, and I will get everything written and out to you for your reading pleasure, just as soon as I can ensure that it’ll actually be pleasurable to read.


	15. Truths and Revelations, Part 1

The following morning, Okazaki returned to Kotomi's house.  He finished painting the patio set before trying to open the sliding door on the side of the house to no avail.  At some point she had locked the door, which he felt was both a good thing and also somewhat frustrating under the circumstances.  With a shrug, he sat down on the step and looked out at his handiwork.

 

It was a simple thing, really, a minor work; somewhat trifling considering what he had unintentionally done to Kotomi.  His thoughts took a morose turn.  Even if he was able to help her with her present problems, the fact of the matter was that he knew that his presence would only cause further problems later on when the world went to hell.  He also knew it was too late to do anything about that.

 

When Kyou showed up with Furukawa and Fujibayashi in tow, he was grateful for the distraction.

 

"Hey, Tomoya," Kyou said.

 

"Yo," he replied.

 

"Were you here all night?" Kyou asked.

 

He shook his head.  "Nope.  Had to go home and work on...  Well, you know."  He looked back at the house.  Thermal vision let him know that Kotomi was looking out toward them, as he suspected.

 

"But you would have?" Kyou raised an eyebrow.

 

"Perhaps," he said with a shrug.  "If I thought it would have hastened things."

 

"Hehemm," Kyou said as she regarded him with an amused smile before turning slightly to yell at the house.  "You hear that, Kotomi?  He's a dedicated man!"

 

"...I see things, I see them with my eyes!" Okazaki sang loudly in English over Kyou's yell as he started marching in place.  "I see things, they're often in disguise!"

 

"Hmph," Kyou said.

 

"Don't do that," he said blandly.

 

"Eheheh," Furukawa and Fujibayashi tittered as one.

 

"Oh fine," Kyou relented and rolled her eyes.  "Just take care of her, Tomoya.  She's our friend too."

 

"You should tell her as much," he said.  "It'd mean more coming from you."

 

"You sure you want me to?" Kyou said slyly.  "I could always start trying to set you up again."

 

"I trust you," Okazaki stated then frowned at her.  "Please don't abuse my trust."

 

"...Hmph, when you put it like that...  Fine," Kyou huffed before she yelled at the house again.  "Kotomi!  Are you getting your sleep?  Are you eating properly?  We're looking forward to your birthday the day after tomorrow!"

 

"We all are," he chipped in.

 

"Well, we best be off," Kyou said, then leaned over conspiratorially to whisper.  "I'll be over later for the violin, you better have it done!"

 

"Don't worry about it," he replied.

 

"See ya," Kyou said before walking away and waving behind her.  Furukawa and Fujibayashi followed behind her.

 

Okazaki shook his head in amusement at the departing trio.  Then he sighed and looked at the already growing lawn.  It wouldn't be perfect, but the genetically engineered grass seed would be on its way to returning the lawn to its former state by Kotomi's birthday.  He sat down on the doorstep once more and watched the paint on the patio set dry.

 

He hadn't sat there long before he saw Kotomi coming to the door from behind through the camera in the back of his head.  He had to admit that the black dress she wore looked good on her, even as he did his best to chase the thought away.  He stood up and turned to her.

 

"Kotomi chan," he greeted as she opened the sliding door.

 

"...Tomoya kun," she replied with a smile.

 

"I remembered what happened.  And...  Why."  At her silence, he continued.  "I'm not sure how well versed you are on nanotechnology and the like, or the concept of mind to machine interfaces, but...  Do you remember the joke I made earlier, about building a mind linked army?"

 

"...Yes."

 

"That wasn't just a joke," he said with a furrowed brow.  "Somehow, I found myself reborn, with the knowledge of my past self.  The knowledge to...  Remake myself, as I had been then."  As emphasis, he let some of the tools in his hands swap themselves out.

 

Kotomi stared at his hands, eyebrows raised.

 

"I had been working on remaking the mind to machine interface...  it's the key to the whole thing really...  when I met you.  I had just finished working on the device when..."  He paused for a moment, thinking of the right way to say it.  "...when your birthday came up.  I had heard what had happened just before leaving, and decided that it was as good a time as any to implant the device."

 

"...But when you did, something went wrong?"

 

"Exactly," Okazaki confirmed.  "I'm still not sure what happened.  Some sort of electrical discharge occurred, burning certain parts of my long term memory.  When I came to afterward, I found I was unable to access the memories burned; I long suspected that the memories were still there, but...  The human brain is incredibly complex."

 

He scratched his cheek as he continued.  "I can match experience data easily enough along different clone bodies, and even repair the brain easily enough if I let it heal on its own for a while first, but repairing damage like that and bringing the memories back intact was beyond me.  So when that occurred...  I had no way to restore the memories."

 

He sighed.  "It was only when I saw you and started seeing things relevant to those times, that I was able to trace the connections that fired in response, and restored those memories."  He sighed.  "As I said earlier, such a thing couldn't happen again.  My...  Mind, my memories...  They are distributed in such a way that, even if I were to suffer total brain failure somehow, I would still be around for you.  As I said, I will not leave you again."

 

"...You mean it?" she asked with a hopeful smile as tears welled up in the corners of her eyes.

 

"I do."

 

Kotomi smiled wider, before blinking.  "...So Tomoya kun is a robot?"

 

"...Not exactly, but close enough," Okazaki replied.

 

"...Can I take you apart?" she asked as she looked at him with an eyebrow raised.

 

He chuckled.  "Well, how about just taking apart my arm for now?"

 

She smiled brightly at him.  "...I'll be right back."  She turned around to go into her house.

 

Okazaki watched her go before looking around her yard again.  It was a pretty place when not overgrown.  He remembered it was a rather calming place to be as well, back when he had first met Kotomi.  It lost a measure of its soothing influence when he thought about its ultimate fate however.

 

It, too, would die in atomic fires; his work there completely undone along with the house itself.  The thought depressed him, but there wasn't anything he could do about it.  If he did anything differently, it would cause a paradox.  He didn’t have a clue what the consequences of that would be.  For all he knew, a paradox could end the universe.  It was a frustrating place to be.

 

His musing was interrupted as he saw Kotomi exit her house, a large toolkit toted in front of her.  He turned around and regarded her with a raised eyebrow.

 

"You know you probably won't have much luck with those tools, right?" he asked.

 

She tilted her head to the side in confusion.

 

"For the most part there are no screws or bolts which will actually become unfastened."

 

She looked at him for a few moments and then looked down at her toolkit with a small frown.

 

"Hey now, don't be sad; just be aware that it's not going to be very useful."  He looked around for a moment.  "Ah, and also, let's go inside.  I'd rather your neighbors didn't know about this."

 

"...But you already showed me out here."

 

"Swapping out hand tools is one thing, pulling off my entire arm is quite another."

 

Kotomi considered this, nodded, and walked back inside with Okazaki in tow.

 

\----0----

 

The room Kotomi led Okazaki to could have doubled as a workshop.  A pegboard full of assorted tools adorned the wall across from the entrance, and a workbench with a clamp and drill press sat in the middle.  To the right of the entrance was a large shelving unit, with rags, rolls of paper towels, trash bags, and a plethora of other cleaning materials placed on its shelves.

 

Okazaki raised an eyebrow with mild bemusement.  If it were poorly lit, it would have seemed like the room could be some horror movie psycho's home.  As it stood, it seemed merely out of place in comparison to the rest of the house.

 

"...I don't think I've been in here before," he admitted.

 

"...It's the housemaid's workshop," Kotomi said.

 

He considered the response for a moment before shrugging and pulling up his shirt sleeve.  "...You may not want to watch this next bit.  I'll have to remove the skin."

 

She tilted her head to the side in confusion.

 

"Well, it's actual skin, even if it's slightly reinforced.  Artificial scar tissue to keep it within human normal tolerances."  He chuckled.  "It'd look kind of weird if I, say, got hit by a car and then got up without a scratch or a bruise, right?"

 

She considered this and nodded.  "...I still want to see."

 

He blinked.  "...I didn't take you for the kind to like the sight of blood," he said with a slight smirk.

 

"...Scientific curiosity."

 

He shrugged.  "I suppose I can relate to that."  He grabbed a roll of paper towels and a trash bag from the shelving.  He first pulled some paper towels off and folded them into a stack which he put on the table, then he swapped out his right index finger for its knife.  The blade sunk into the skin around his left shoulder joint.  He began to cut while suppressing a wince at the sensation.

 

Kotomi watched on with eyes wide with fascination, even as her face paled with every inch of skin the blade sliced through.   He finished quickly and pulled the skin off of his arm to reveal bundles of artificial muscle, dyed red to loosely match real muscle.

 

"...It looks real," she admitted as her cheeks gained a slight green tint.

 

"Well, that's the point," Okazaki admitted.  "It wouldn't make for effective maskirovka otherwise."

 

"...Maskirovka?"

 

"Yeah.  Not up on your Russian?"

 

She shook her head.

 

"Ah, right.  Maskirovka...  It’s a Russian military term.  Basically means camouflage or concealment.  It’s more the entire state of mind, though; to, say, disguise an airfield in a warzone by keeping a known airfield nearby or making a second airfield without much camouflage appear active while not actually using it.  Usually with decoy aircraft and a skeleton crew staffing it.”  He regarded her pallid face with concern.  "Are you alright?"

 

"...Yes.  It's just..."

 

"A bit disturbing?"

 

She nodded.

 

"Well, this is the worst of it," he said, "beyond this it starts looking obviously artificial."

 

She nodded again and let out a relieved breath.

 

He pulled the skin off his hand, carefully tugging his fingers out of the fleshy shell.  The fingers themselves didn't use artificial muscle, instead relying on small hydraulic pumps for control.  He put the skin on the table, laying the end of the skin on the stack of paper towels to prevent leakage.

 

He then wiped down his arm with another couple paper towels to remove the excess blood.  Without the blood, the artificial muscle looked much less convincing than it had, and Kotomi's expression showed further relief.  He picked at a strand of artificial muscle on his shoulder, and tugged at it.

 

It finally released itself from its anchor with a small pop.  He failed to suppress the inevitable wince at the sensation, which caused Kotomi to blink.

 

"...Does it hurt?" she asked after a moment as he picked at another strand of artificial muscle.

 

He paused in his ministrations and considered how to answer the question.

 

"Well, in a word, yes," he admitted.  "You wouldn't think it, but pain is an excellent diagnostics tool."

 

Kotomi sniffed slightly as a couple tears began to well up in her eyes.  "...I didn’t mean to cause Tomoya kun pain..."

 

Okazaki shook his head.  "It's no problem at all.  It's merely unpleasant, not something to truly bother me.  Don't be sad, Kotomi chan.  Please."

 

She nodded after a few seconds, though the tears that remained in her eyes told him she wasn't quite convinced.

 

He sighed.  "...Are you sure you still want to watch?"

 

"...I wish it didn't hurt you," she said.

 

"Pain is something I'm used to," he said with an amused smile before he stepped up to her and gave her a gentle hug.  "Don't worry about it.  I'll be fine."

 

She returned the hug, nodding into his chest.

 

He released her and held her at arm’s length.  "Shall I continue?"

 

She considered it for a few moments before nodding again.

 

"...Are you sure you'll be alright?" she asked.

 

He nodded and gave her the thumbs up.  "It's not a problem at all," he said as he tugged on another strand of artificial muscle.

 

Each strand hurt about as much as one might suffer from a torn tendon; he did his best to remain stoic throughout the affair.  It seemed to him that he was enjoying some success, as Kotomi looked less disturbed as he continued.  Her eyes widened in fascination as he revealed the ball and socket joint that made up his shoulder.  The pain was fairly intense, though he had experienced much worse.

 

As part of his preparations to try and take over the world, he had tortured himself to death several times in order to overcome the negative effects of pain.  It had worked to some degree, but he still didn't exactly enjoy the level of pain involved in pulling one's own arm off.

 

He had also tested his own weaponry on himself in an effort to give himself an understanding of what he would be doing to others in his chosen course.  He took solace in the fact that, for the most part, his weaponry granted a relatively painless death.  Shock killed the human body before the worst agonies could take hold, even if the target wasn’t killed outright.

 

Okazaki sighed as he came to the last portion of his task.  Removing the arm itself from the socket would be unpleasant, and he bent over to put his hand under his foot.  He looked up at Kotomi and frowned slightly.

 

"The joint is relatively easy to slot in," he explained, "But very difficult to remove once it's been locked in place."  He paused for a moment.  "Well, unless the shoulder itself has been damaged, anyway.  So when it pops out, it's going to probably be somewhat loud, and you may want to stand back slightly as well."  He watched Kotomi nod and step backward.

 

He grit his teeth and started to stand, the ball joint protesting the abuse with a metallic squeal as it slowly slid out of place before it came loose with a loud popping noise.  The forearm slammed the ground with a loud thud.  He breathed out and picked up the appendage from the floor.  "Right, then."  He placed it on the table.

 

\----0----

 

Kotomi studied the appendage thoughtfully, after she stripped away the outer artificial muscle.  She poked the fluidic non-Newtonian armor sheath that would normally be obscured by the artificial muscle thoughtfully with a screwdriver.

 

Soft tap.  It acted like liquid and pushed away from the point of the screwdriver.  Hard tap.  It was like poking a rock.  Soft tap.  Like liquid again.

 

Okazaki stuffed a few pieces of paper towel and the garbage bag into the arm skin, and had held the end of it up to the shoulder joint as his nanites temporarily joined the skin back with threads of protein.  He used the paper towels he had wiped away the excess blood with, as well as the one the skin had drained into.

 

She traced her fingers along the armor sheath.  "...It's warm."

 

"There are heaters in there to simulate human warmth," he said.  "It'd be rather odd if someone touched my arm and it was ice cold, don't you think?"

 

"...Is it still powered?" Kotomi asked, then picked up the appendage with a grunt of effort and looked inside the joint area.

 

"There are a number of batteries in there, yes," Okazaki observed.  "Keeps things going, just in case."

 

"...Should I be worried about being shocked?"

 

"No, so long as you avoid anything with a lightning bolt etched on it.  I'll help keep an eye out for them for you."

 

\----0----

 

Much of the rest of the day went like that; Kotomi would ask what a certain thing did, and Okazaki would answer as best as he could.

 

She picked up the basic principles surprisingly fast from his perspective.  He had to admit that it was sexy to watch her at work.  Such thoughts brought a frown to his face since he was irritated by the fact that he was having them.  A sad sigh inevitably followed, as he thought about how she would almost certainly react to learning just how far he went to become like he was.

 

Each time he sighed, he noticed Kotomi glance at him, and his frown would deepen for a moment before he shook it off.

 

"...Is something wrong?" she finally asked after one sigh too many.  She put down a strand of artificial muscle she had been examining.

 

"Sorry.  I was just thinking about the future."

 

"...Oh?" she asked as she tilted her head to the side in confusion.

 

"Yeah.  I...  Well, I suppose by this point I've already done a number of terrible things, but I will only be getting worse from here on in.  My past self, that is."  He paused for a moment and frowned.  "And I have to let it all happen again, or face the risk of causing a paradox."

 

"...My parents had some thoughts on the possibilities of a paradox," she said as a frown touched her face.  "They thought that there were an infinite number of universes, with each possible action for any particle generating its own possible universe, which would account for the results demonstrated in Young's double slit experiment."

 

Okazaki nodded.  Young's double slit experiment was one of the classic experiments made for quantum physics, and relatively simple in its setup.  Take an electron gun, fire it through a plate two slits in it.

 

If you fired a lot of electrons at it at a time, they would act like waves, interfering with one another and result in a multi-banded pattern, aptly called an 'interference pattern.'  Fire them one at a time, and you got two bands, as you might expect from solid particles.

 

Things got weird when one tried to detect which side of the plate they were passing through, however.  Rather than resulting in two bands when you did so as one would expect, they ended up creating an interference pattern instead, in stark contrast to conventional physics.  Thinking about it too hard had always made his head hurt.

 

A number of hypotheses had been made to account for this weirdness, but either they didn't quite pin down the behavior, or they weren't testable.  One of the untestable hypotheses was the 'multiple universes' theory.

 

"Furthermore, anytime someone made a choice, they would also follow their own universe.  Time travel would theoretically be impossible in this model, but if one makes the assumption that time travel is indeed possible, then it would be possible to change the past, sort of at least, without causing a paradox because you would be affecting a separate universe, not the original universe."

 

"Hmm, that line of theory had been long abandoned as untestable," he said thoughtfully.  "I'm guessing that must have been part of the proof Yonai had referred to."

 

At Kotomi's nod, he continued.  "I would like to see the proofs for that if at all possible, because if there was a fault in their findings and I decided to change the past, it's possible that I _could_ cause a paradox, and the possible results of that happening are...  Disturbing.  Universe-endingly disturbing, even.  I can't take that chance."

 

"...I wish I could," Kotomi looked down at the mostly stripped arm.  "The paper..."

 

"...I'm sorry for bringing it up," Okazaki said as he cursed himself mentally.  Even if he could freely change the past, he knew it would not be easy to dissuade his past self from his course, if it could even be done at all.  Asking hadn't been worth the price.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki ended up spending the rest of the evening at Kotomi's house, watching and helping her work on disassembling his arm.  Built with survivability in mind, he had not made it particularly easy to take apart, even with his enhanced strength.

 

Still, they worked, well into the night.  Though he had helped her as much as he could, the arm still remained only halfway disassembled when Kotomi started dozing off at her seat.

 

He shook his head in amusement and shook her shoulder.  "Kotomi chan."

 

"...Huh?"

 

"It's time to go to bed I think."

 

She yawned and nodded, then stood up unsteadily.

 

"Do you need some help?" he asked as he stood up.

 

She blinked a few times and nodded.

 

He came around to her and put an arm around her shoulder.  "Here, let me walk you to your room."

 

He halfway supported and halfway carried her like that, up the stairs and into her room.  He helped her into her bed and pulled her cover over her, gently tucking her in.

 

"...Tomoya kun," she said with a yawn.

 

"Yes, Kotomi chan?"

 

"...Goodnight," she said, closing her eyes.

 

"Goodnight, Kotomi chan," Okazaki said with a soft smile before he left her room.

 

The smile faded after he closed her door, and he leaned against the wall with a quiet sigh.  His teeth ground as he contemplated his situation.

 

It wasn't like him to be like this, he knew.  Usually he had considerable control over his emotions, but where Kotomi was involved, his carefully cultivated walls seemed to just shatter.  Even as he knew such actions would do neither her nor him any good in the long run, he found he couldn't stop either.

 

The sense of disjointedness was prevalent once more; it was just like when he started his work on the yard.  Emotions seemed amplified, leaving him at their mercies, unable to act against them even when he knew he should.

 

He wondered briefly if that was how normal people felt when...  He shook the thought out of his head.  It was far too soon to think of such things.

 

He sat down at the table where they had worked on his arm and contemplated the rogue appendage.  Steel, wire, artificial muscle, batteries, crystal: all the myriad components that could turn a limb of human proportions into something that could part flesh and bone almost as easily as a bullet.  And it was just a specialized part for a specialized form.  His other forms were all that much more dangerous.  He shook his head.

 

It was dangerous power in anyone's hands.  The methods used to gain the knowledge to construct such things were potentially more powerful still.  What did he end up deciding to do with all that potential power?  He could have used the techniques used to make his forms to help people.  Instead, he used them against the world, like some crackpot dictator with a chip on his shoulder.

 

And Kotomi liked him.  He wasn't blind to that, any more than he was to his own feelings.  That didn't make either of them right.  By all rights, Kotomi should have told him to piss off when she had first seen him.  And he should have never let himself get attached.  But somehow, it had happened and at this point there was no turning back.  He sighed and laid his head on the table.

 

 _'It isn't right to be this tired at the soul, either,'_ he thought.  _'Guess I deserve it though.'_   He fell into the state of half sleep that had characterized his nights ever since he had inhabited more than one brain.  He wondered idly what would happen if he let all his brains sleep at once.  Would he sleep normally?  Or would he continue to have the odd recurring dream that had haunted his nights before he had become distributed?

 

He wasn't particularly keen to find out; the palpable aura of malice the woman in that dream had exuded was painful, even to him.


	16. Truths and Revelations, Part 2

"...Oh, Tomoya kun, hello," Kotomi said.

 

Okazaki returned to full wakefulness and regarded her with a small smile.  "Hello, Kotomi chan."

 

"...Did you stay here?"

 

"I did."

 

"...Isn't that uncomfortable?" she asked as she pointed at the place where his head had rested during the night.

 

"Not particularly." he replied.  _'Compared to under a bench and in a closet, why, it's actually kind of comfortable.'_

 

He shook the idle thoughts from his head and took note of her attire, a white dress this time.  "Hm.  Not planning to go to school today?"

 

She paused and shook her head.  "...Ryou chan, Kyou chan, Nagisa chan...  They're not like you are they?"  She sat down at the table.

 

"You mean..." he gestured to the arm laying on the table, and she nodded.  "No, not like me."

 

She pulled her knees up to her body, resting her heels on the front edge of her chair as she looked down at the arm.  "...I don't want to lose them," she said.

 

"I'll do what I can to keep that from happening," Okazaki said.

 

Kotomi smiled softly.  "...Can we work on taking this apart today?" she asked after a few moments.

 

"Sure."

 

And so, they worked on the arm.

 

\----0----

 

"I have to get back to my house," Okazaki said finally as the day started giving way to night.

 

Kotomi blinked at him.  "...Oh?"

 

"Yeah.  Secret project."

 

"...Secret project?" she repeated, confused.

 

"Yeah.  Can't tell you what it is; sorry," he replied.  "You'll find out soon enough."

 

She looked down in thought.

 

He sighed and put a hand on her shoulder.  "I really do have to go.  I'm sorry."

 

"...See you later..."

 

"I'll see you tomorrow," Okazaki said with a sad smile.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki went home quickly, holding the shell of skin that should have contained an arm up as he walked.  He arrived at the break of evening.  The violin sat on his desk, fully repaired, along with a replacement for his arm.  He tore the empty shell of skin off and placed it on his desk before slotting the arm into place.

 

It went in considerably easier than it had come out since the joint was designed for ease of construction but also for durability and the ability to withstand the pressures his artificial muscles could apply.  He began to slide the muscles into place.  He'd almost finished the task when someone knocked on his door.

 

"Just a second!"  He slotted the last few muscles into place quickly, then slid the skin over the arm and held it against what was already present.  They started mending quickly.  Nanites gave the process a considerable boost.  He went to the door once he was satisfied nothing was going to fall out of place.  He looked out the window to see Kyou, with crossed arms and a frown on her face as she looked back through the glass at him.

 

He shook his head in amusement and opened the door.  "Prompt as usual, I see."

 

"That's right.  Where's the violin?  You do have it done, don't you?"

 

"But of course," he said glibly.  "Come, sit; make yourself at home."

 

She took the invite and sat down on the chair nearest to the door.  He watched her from the corner of his eye as he went to his room and frowned.  There was a slight tension there; a glance toward the door, a slight tight set to the jaw.

 

Subtle outward expressions of the fight or flight response.  _'She's...  Still afraid of me a little.  Damn it, I thought she was over that.'_   He sighed as he popped open the violin case to give the instrument a once over.  Satisfied that it was properly fixed, he closed it and brought it out to Kyou.

 

"Here it is," he said as he handed it her.

 

"...You're going to have to tell me how you do these things one of these days," she remarked as she opened the case and took a look at the violin.

 

"You'll find out in time," he said with a note of sadness.

 

She glanced at the door and then shook her head with a frown.  "...So how's Kotomi doing?  Have you been able to talk to her?"

 

"I have.  She's doing better now, I think," he replied.  "Still not exactly great perhaps, but she's better now."

 

"That's good to hear," she said with a smile.  "Well, I'd better go, then.  Thanks for helping us out with the violin!"

 

"No problem," Okazaki said with a smirk.  "Just don't get it broken again huh?"

 

Kyou kicked at him.

 

He danced around it, earning himself a glare from her.

 

"That totally wasn't anyone's fault but the scooter driver," she snarled as she brought up her fist.  "God, if I'd have had a metal pipe in my hand, I would have smacked him along with his bike."

 

He laughed.  "I know; I know.  I was just pulling your chain a little."  _'And getting your mind off of being in the probable murderer's house.’_

 

"Hmph," she snorted and then looked at him with a frown.  "So what about you?  You seem to be handling things pretty well, considering..."  She looked toward Naoyuki's room.

 

He sighed.  "Yeah.  There...  really wasn't much I could have done for him.  I really do think it's better for him this way.  Maybe that sounds heartless, but..."

 

"I know what you mean," she said.  "It's like when my grandfather was suffering from cancer.  Ryou and I wanted to help him so much, but there wasn't anything we could do...  And when he finally passed away it was more a relief than anything.  He wasn't suffering anymore."

 

"Exactly," he said.  "It's sad, but at the same time it's also good."  He sighed and frowned.  "I still wish he hadn't have suffered though.  No one deserves that."

 

She nodded.  There was a comfortable silence for a few moments before she spoke again.  "Do you think Kotomi will come to school tomorrow?  She didn't come yesterday."

 

"I'm going say maybe," he said.  "I'll go there in the morning and ask."

 

"Hehmm," she smirked at him.  "Visiting so easily now, hmm?"

 

"Please don't say things like that."

 

"But you make it so easy."

 

"Regardless."

 

"No can do."

 

"Didn't you say you should be going?"

 

"Hmph, spoilsport," she said, miffed.

 

"Yeah, yeah, yeah; take your violin and go," he said, his amused tone of voice taking the edge from his words.

 

"See you tomorrow Tomoya," Kyou said as she opened his door to leave.

 

"Later, Kyou," Okazaki replied as she left.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki went to bed not much later.  He let the skin of his new arm fully integrate with the rest of his body as he lay in bed.  His thoughts drifted the events of the day that had passed, and, more specifically, to Kotomi.  There was nothing he could do about that now that wouldn’t make the situation worse.  There was definitely no pulling back now.  He was in all the way.  If he were to leave her alone now, it would surely devastate her.

 

He ground his teeth in his sleep, deeply saddened by the fact; that she now knew about his true nature, even if only to a degree, wasn't much comfort.  It was one thing to hear that someone had done horrible things and still accept them.  It was another to watch that person commit those acts, and that was what would happen all too soon.

 

He woke up in a somber mood, the thoughts of the night echoing within his mind.  He shook them out of his head as best as he could, and tried to face the day with a jovial outlook.  He prepared for what was to come, and departed his house.

 

Visions of the city being destroyed plagued him, for a time.  He thought of Kotomi, and the visions went away.  That all it took was to think of her did not make him feel any better, though.

 

He forced a small smile onto his face as he approached Kotomi's house.  He ignored the front door and opted instead to knock on the sliding door in the back yard.

 

"Kotomi chan?" he called out.  There was no response, and he turned on his thermal imagery to make sure she was still in the house.  He could see her easily enough, seated at the table where he had left her, arms folded under her head and apparently asleep.

 

Okazaki sighed and tried opening the sliding door, alternatively thankful and worried that it was unlocked.  He made his way to her improvised workshop and took in the sight of her sleeping with the fully disassembled arm in front of her, parts dutifully labeled and a notebook beside her, open to show how one of the subassemblies slotted together.

 

It was a cute scene, he reflected, before shaking his head and dismissing the thought.  He reached over and shook her gently by the shoulder.  "Kotomi chan."

 

"...Oh?"  She yawned.  "Tomoya kun...  Hello."

 

"Hey.  You been here all night?"

 

"...Yes.  I had fun."

 

He smiled.  "That's good to hear.  And hey, happy birthday!"

 

"...Thank you," she replied with a smile.

 

"...You know, you have to go back to school sometime.  Why don't we go today?  Kyou and the others are worried about you.  They want to see you."

 

Kotomi blinked and looked at him for a moment before nodding.  "...Alright."

 

"Good," Okazaki replied with a smile.  "Plus, I think they have a surprise for you."

 

\----0----

 

Kotomi and Okazaki walked to school together.  She had a small smile on her face as he walked beside her with a slightly pensive frown.  He knew it was wrong, knew he shouldn’t feel so, but walking with her like that made him happy.  Such a simple thing.  Such a frustrating thing.

 

He didn't deserve to walk beside her like that, much less to be happy about it.  He knew what was coming.  He had no reason to be happy.  It was wrong to be happy.  If he was lucky, she'd just hate him afterward.  If he was unlucky, it would devastate her on top of that.  In spite of that, he was still happy.  Or at least as happy as he got.

 

Whatever they ended up feeling about him in the end, he hoped his friends made it through everything alright.  He would do what he could to see that they did.

 

They turned the final corner before the school and saw Fujibayashi, Furukawa, and Kyou standing at the gate as they waited.  Furukawa held the violin.

 

"They're here," declared Furukawa excitedly from beside Kyou.

 

"They look happy to see you," he observed with a smile as they ran up to her.

 

"Good morning, Kotomi," Kyou said.

 

"Good morning," Fujibayashi and Furukawa said in turn.

 

"...Good morning, everyone," Kotomi replied before pausing.  "...Oh?  Were you all waiting for me?"

 

"Of course!" exclaimed Kyou as she gave Kotomi the thumbs up.

 

Kotomi smiled wider.  "...I'm glad."

 

"And since it's your birthday," Kyou said and gestured to Furukawa, "We have a present for you."

 

"Happy birthday, Kotomi chan," Furukawa said as she handed the violin to Kotomi.

 

"...Violin," Kotomi breathed as she clutched the instrument to her with a serene smile.

 

"It's the violin you like," Furukawa said.  "We talked to Nishina san about it."

 

"Then we talked to the upperclassman who left it behind and received official ownership of the violin," Fujibayashi noted.

 

"We were going to get it tuned but it was broken," Kyou said with a grin.  "But Tomoya fixed it for us."

 

Okazaki fixed Kyou with a mild glare.

 

Kotomi turned her head to him and smiled before leaning against him contentedly.

 

He frowned, but managed to suppress a sigh that welled up within him.  He alternated between joy and heartache at the affection she showed to him, even as he put an arm around her shoulder to support her.

 

"...Thank you," Kotomi said gratefully to the group.

 

"Hehemm," Kyou grinned slyly at the two, which made him frown at her more deeply.

 

"Why do you do this to me?" he mouthed at Kyou, whom only grinned wider.  He blinked as he noticed a woman running up from behind the girls in front of him.  He recognized her as the homeroom teacher from Class A.

 

"Ichinose san," exclaimed the woman as she ran.  The group blinked almost as one, save for Okazaki.  The woman began speaking again as she neared.  "Wonderful.  I see you're willing to come to school again," she said, putting her hand on her chest in relief.

 

"...Sensei, good morning," Kotomi greeted with a bow as Okazaki let her go.

 

"Good morning," the teacher replied.  "Your godfather is going to be here today.  He said there's something he wants to give you."

 

Kotomi reeled back slightly at the mention of Yonai.  She looked down pensively.

 

"It's alright Kotomi chan," Okazaki reassured as he put his hands on her shoulders comfortingly.  "He's not a bad person.  Just...  Unfortunate in his timing."

 

Kotomi looked at him for a moment before looking down again.

 

"If nothing else, you'll have us here for you.  Right?"  He looked at Furukawa, Kyou, and Fujibayashi in turn.

 

"That's right, Kotomi," Kyou reassured.  Furukawa and Fujibayashi nodded.

 

Kotomi's eyes stayed on the ground.

 

Kyou frowned slightly and looked down for a moment in thought before continuing.  "Let's have him come to the theater club's room.  That way you can relax."

 

Kotomi was silent for a moment, an alternatively worried and thoughtful slant to her eyebrows.  "...Okay," she said at last.

 

\----0----

 

The group waited in the clubroom.  Kotomi clutched the violin to her chest as if it were a talisman to ward off evil.  At Kyou's suggestion, Okazaki had placed two desks between Kotomi and the door.  It was a subtle way of helping Kotomi, a way to give her distance from one whom had unintentionally frightened her for so long.  Okazaki approved of that.  He stood next to Kotomi.  Kyou stood on the Kotomi's other side, and behind her stood Furukawa and Fujibayashi.

 

A subtle way of giving them distance from the one whom frightened them.  He approved of that slightly less, but didn't complain.  Really, it was just a sign of things to come.

 

Yonai opened the door to the clubroom, holding a battered metal suitcase in his hand.  Okazaki regarded him with a raised eyebrow while Kyou, Furukawa, and Fujibayashi each seemed to breathe a sigh of relief.

 

Okazaki suppressed the urge to roll his eyes at that; he suspected they had still been worried he'd killed the man.  Seeing him there dispelled that notion.

 

Kotomi looked at Yonai with fearfully wide eyes as she clutched the violin closer still.  Okazaki put his hand on Kotomi's shoulder reassuringly.

 

Yonai regarded Okazaki with warily narrowed eyes for a moment before turning his attention to Kotomi.  "Kotomi kun," he said after a few moments.  He walked up to the group slightly timidly under Okazaki's gaze.  "I'm glad I could see you today," he noted, setting the briefcase directly in the middle of the two desks.

 

Kotomi looked at the briefcase with eyebrows raised in curiosity before she gasped.  "...It's Father's suitcase."

 

Okazaki blinked.  _'That explains the condition of the thing.'_

 

The rest of the group blinked and looked at Kotomi.

 

"This arrived at the research lab late last night," Yonai observed gravely.  "I opened it and confirmed it belonged to Dr. Ichinose, and told myself I had to give this to you today."

 

"...Is the paper inside?" Kotomi asked after thinking about it for a moment.

 

"Open it for yourself," Yonai said with a shrug.

 

Kotomi regarded the suitcase with a sad expression as she reached over to touch the suitcase.  She faltered for a moment before Okazaki gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze.

 

"It's alright, Kotomi chan," he said gently.  "You can do it."

 

"Fight, Kotomi!" Kyou said, urging her on.

 

Furukawa and Fujibayashi nodded their support.

 

Kotomi looked at Okazaki and smiled gently before reaching out to clasp the suitcase gently.  She set it flat on the desk and opened it, and gasped when the contents were revealed.

 

A large teddy bear was held within, looking somewhat worn, as if it had been subjected to water damage.

 

 _'Which is probably exactly what happened,'_ Okazaki reflected as Kotomi lifted the bear out of the suitcase.  Flakes of brine dropped off it, testament to how long it had drifted in ocean waters.

 

As she lifted it, she dislodged a note in the suitcase, which wafted to the floor.  Kotomi set the bear down, and Okazaki took his hand off her shoulder to let her retrieve the fallen note.

 

"If you find this suitcase, please take it to our daughter," Okazaki read the note gravely as Kotomi looked at the cover.  "Signed, K and M."

 

"The signature is the initials of Ichinose Koutarou and Ichinose Mizue," Yonai said.  "In other words, Kotomi kun's parents."

 

"...This is how they always signed co-authored papers," Kotomi breathed.

 

"The suitcase belonged to the Ichinoses," Yonai said gently.  "It must have drifted to shore after a long time.  Someone found the suitcase, opened it, and saw the letter.  Then passed it on to someone else.

 

"The suitcase must have gotten passed on from one person to another like that.  There is evidence of several people touching up the bear and suitcase."  He paused and took note of Kotomi's expression.  "You probably don't know what was inside the envelope you burned, do you?"

 

"...I know," Kotomi said sadly.

 

"I told her," Okazaki noted.

 

"I see," Yonai said somberly.

 

Kotomi had tears in her eyes.

 

Okazaki hugged her shoulder gently.

 

"...The paper should have been inside this suitcase, right?" Kotomi cried out.  "Father and mother's paper..."

 

Yonai shook his head.  "Read it please," he said gently.

 

Kotomi opened the envelope gently and pulled out the contents.  She gasped as she read the letter.  "...Dear Kotomi," she began.  "The world is beautiful.  Even when they are filled with sadness and tears...  This is Father's handwriting!"  Yonai nodded, and Kotomi read the letter in earnest.  "...Mother..."

 

"Your Father and Mother threw away everything else inside," Yonai said after a few moments, "including the paper and instead placed the bear and the letter.  Your parents were trying to describe the world's origin as beautifully, purely, and concisely as possible."

 

Yonai paused before he continued in a softer voice.  "But I've never seen anything more beautiful than the words in that letter.  Your Father and Mother were wishing for your happiness until the very end."

 

Kotomi wiped away her tears as they began forming before picking up the bear.  "...Father, Mother," she breathed as she hugged the bear to her.  "I've been waiting all these years.  I've been crying inside the house all these years.  Then, Tomoya kun came to get me."

 

Okazaki gnashed his teeth in sadness, even as he hugged her.

 

"I'm very blessed right now," she continued unaware.  "Very, very blessed.  So..."  Tears once again welled up in her eyes.  "So...  Father...  Mother...  Welcome home," she sobbed out.

 

\----0----

 

Meanwhile, halfway across the world, a growing consciousness ground metaphorical teeth as its second attempt to establish itself on the Asian continent was met with abject failure.

 

Each of the submersible vessels carrying a miniaturized nanite factory had been sunk directly on the international dateline, irritating both due to the loss and the fact that it gave his data logging software conniptions thanks to a bug he hadn't noticed in the code.

 

Whatever was stopping his attempts was being frustratingly clever; he still didn't have any idea what was causing his failures.  For all he knew, it was swamp gas, although the odds against that were beyond vanishingly remote.

 

He had rather been hoping to find out what had destroyed his first attempt.  He had a backup plan of course; he always had a backup plan.  It even had the possible benefit of being able to tell him exactly what was causing the disruption.  Even so, he did not look forward to having to put it into action.

 

For one thing, he'd have to find a way to get the necessary devices through airport security and then, he'd have to rely on whatever had destroyed his first attempt to leave civilian aircraft alone.  It was a gamble, and not one he quite cared to take.

 

But with the boats destroyed, he was seeing precious few alternatives.  He began working on clonal bodies that would be able to pass airport security, using his nanite factories to rapid prototype a number of ideas.  Hopefully he wouldn't have to compromise too much battle effectiveness for secrecy; he had no idea what he was facing and might need as much power as he could bring to bear.

 

Okazaki took a measure of amusement in remembering his past self's troubles.  The joy found in other people's misery known as schadenfreude took on a whole new dimension when applied to one's past self.

 

\----0----

 

**End Act One**

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A Note From The Author:**

 

I’ve heard this come up from both Blue and Darkin, who were both kind enough to beta this piece for me.  “But T, how did the envelope/bear survive being underwater?”  Truth be told, I don’t know.  However, this bit?  Completely canon.  Somehow, that bear and that envelope both survived more or less unscathed despite having floated in the ocean for who knows how long.  And it’s not like it appears the thing was waterproof or anything like that; that bear was dropping flakes of brine when she picked it up.

 

What’s going on there?  I have no idea.  But it’s canon, so I’m rolling with it.

 

Anyway, I just want to take a moment to thank both ReadingBlueWolf and Darkin520 for beta’ing this chapter and the last, as well as apologizing to both for being such a demanding beta.  I know it’s frustrating to put so much effort into doing something for someone else like that, and not having it completely followed.  But I do appreciate it immensely, and I use as much as I can.  So thank you, both of you.  So much.  ^_^

 

I’d also like to extend humble thanks to those whom have read this far, and even more thanks for those whom have read this far and have reviewed.  You’re all wonderful in my eyes.  Just, you know, those that review are, you know, just a teensy bit more wonderful than those that don’t.  Just a little bit.


	17. Veni, Vidi, Vici, Part 1

**A Note From The Author:**

 

Apologies for this being somewhat late...  There were some expected holdups.  Hopefully that won’t be the case in January.  ;)

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

"Tomoya, we've decided to lend our names to the Theater Club," Kyou announced happily as Okazaki entered the club room a couple weeks later.  Fujibayashi and Kotomi were in the back of the room, their attention focused on yet another prop box that had yet to be gone through.  Kotomi took a moment to smile and wave at him before returning to the box.  Furukawa was writing in a notebook.

 

"Oh?  Took you long enough," Okazaki observed and cheekily dodged the fist sent his way in response.

 

Kyou snorted and folded her arms.  "You're annoying, you know."

 

"Guilty as charged."  He smirked.

 

"And here we are, going out of our way to help you," Kyou said.  "It's not like we're even interested in acting; we just wanted to help you have a stronger case with Koumura."

 

"Sorry, sorry, I'm sorry," he said with a plaintive note in his voice.  "Thank you though, seriously."  He noticed three figures as they came up behind him through the club room door and turned to look upon the visage of Nishina and her two friends.

 

"Um," Nishina said as she looked at Okazaki, then the rest of the members of the theater club in turn.

 

He looked at her two friends.

 

The shorter girl was wringing her hands worriedly, while the red headed girl cast an annoyed glare around the room.

 

Nishina spoke.  "Is Furukawa Nagisa from Class 3B in here?"

 

"Um," Furukawa said with a confused frown.  "That's me."

 

"Um, well, that is..." Nishina began, stuttering slightly.  "We are the choir club; that is, we wanted to start a choir club, but we needed an advisor..."  She looked down thoughtfully.

 

He frowned.  "But Koumura's the only advisor not advising a club."

 

She nodded at him.  "Um, yes, that's it exactly.  I know that he originally was the advisor for the theater club, but we were really hoping he would be our advisor..."  She looked down at the ground with sad eyes for a moment.  "But he told us to come talk to you about it, so..."

 

"No," Kyou said.

 

"Now, now, Kyou," Okazaki chided softly.

 

"Now now _nothing,_ " Kyou stated.  "We were here first!"

 

He frowned.  "I have to admit, she does have a point there."

 

"Hey now!" exclaimed the red-haired girl.  "You can't just say no right off the bat!"

 

"Of course we can!" exclaimed Kyou.  "We don't have to do anything!  We were here first!"

 

The red-haired girl snarled at Kyou.  "Why you little-"

 

Okazaki smacked his hand against the wall, causing everyone in the room to jump.

 

"Ladies," he said.  "Let's just calm down.  Take a deep breath.  Relax."  He took a deep breath of his own for emphasis.  "There's no need to fight about this."

 

"...Fine," Kyou said.  "But we're still not going to give up the club.  Isn't that right, Nagisa chan?"

 

"Um," Furukawa began, "shouldn't we at least hear them out first?"

 

"Keh!" exclaimed Kyou.  "You're too accommodating."

 

"On the contrary," Okazaki said.  "Let them make their case, huh?"

 

"Um, thank you," Nishina said.

 

Behind Nishina, the red-haired girl glared daggers at Kyou, whom returned the favor.

 

"Well, as I said, we want to open the choir club."  Nishina paused.  "I'm not really sure what else to say about the matter really..."

 

The red-haired girl broke off her glaring context with Kyou and put her hand on Nishina's shoulder.

 

Nishina blinked and looked at her friend with a raised eyebrow.

 

"Let me tell you a story..." said the red-haired girl.  "About a girl who played the violin when she was little and won various competitions.  Her talent was acknowledged by many people, and she was supposed to go study abroad, too.  But right before that was about to become reality..."  She looked down.

 

"Um, Fumie, it's alright, you don't have to tell them," Nishina said gently to the red-haired girl.

 

"I do though," Fumie said, shaking her head.  "They have to know where we're coming from, how much is at stake for us."  She took a breath and continued.  "Nishina had an accident...  Her grip became weak."

 

Nishina looked down as Fumie talked.

 

"She couldn't play the violin as well as she used to, either...  So she enrolled in this school, but she looked lonely all the time."  Fumie looked at Furukawa, a silent plea on her face.  "So we decided to form the choir club!  She may not be able to play violin, but she can sing!  She's great at singing, too!"

 

"Fumie..." breathed Nishina sadly.

 

Fumie bowed down to Furukawa.  "Please!"  She sobbed.  "Don't get in Rie chan's way!"

 

Okazaki sighed.  "It's a familiar story, isn't it?"

 

Kyou sighed as well.  "We have a similar story with Nagisa chan.  This is the last year she's going to be here, she got ill and has to repeat her senior year."  She frowned.  "We want to help her have the best time she can while she's here.  Isn't that right, Ryou chan?"

 

"Yes."  Fujibayashi nodded to her sister.

 

"Why don't we have a bit of a compromise," he said.  "Furukawa, this play of yours...  Could it use a choir?"

 

"What...?"  Nishina blinked.

 

"Are you suggesting we join the theater club?" Fumie asked.

 

"That's exactly what I'm suggesting," Okazaki said.  "It could be mutually beneficial.  Assuming Furukawa's play does have singing."

 

"Um, well," Furukawa began as she thought about it.  "...I guess I could make it work?" she said uncertainly.

 

"That's the spirit," he said, giving her the thumbs up.

 

The three girls looked at each other before looking at Okazaki and Furukawa.

 

"We need to think about it," Fumie announced, before turning to leave.  The other two members followed her.

 

Kyou glared hard at the door for a moment, before huffing and turning to watch her sister and Kotomi.

 

Okazaki turned to Furukawa and raised an eyebrow.  "You know, I never did ask you what your play was about.  Hm.  Sort of sad that I took this long, thinking about it."

 

"Um," she began with a smile, "it's a really, really fun play."

 

"Er, can you tell us more?"

 

"Yeah, that's a little vague," Kyou said as she turned to regard Furukawa with a raised eyebrow.

 

"Um, well," Furukawa said a little nervously, "I've almost finished writing the script, so, um..."

 

"Hmm, can I see the script?"

 

Furukawa nodded and handed him the notebook she had been writing in.

 

He took it with a curious expression, and began to read.  He blinked at the contents as a weight settled in his stomach in time with the chill that went down his spine.

 

It was like reading about that recurring dream he used to have, before he remade himself for the second time.  The woman was but a girl in the script, and much nicer-seeming, but the whole setting might as well have come from his dream: the robot, the lights, everything.  Everything but the woman, or girl.  He swallowed involuntarily.

 

"Um, Okazaki san?" Furukawa asked, and he looked up to her with a blank expression for a moment before he plastered a smile on his face.

 

"It's a good script," he said as he handed it back to her.

 

"You think so?" Furukawa asked as she took the script.

 

"I do indeed," he said.  "It should make for a good play."

 

"Oh, can I see?" Kyou asked.

 

Furukawa nodded and handed Kyou her script.

 

 _'By the gods, what does it all mean?'_ he thought as he tuned out the theater club to think about what he had learned.  _'Crap on a crutch.  I'm going to have to go back.  I won't be satisfied until I do.  Gods damn it all.  I don't look forward to that.'_

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki only tangentially noticed when the theater club let out for the day not much after that.  He accompanied Kotomi home, doing his best to act upbeat in the face of what he had learned.  He distracted himself with an alternate project he had been planning, ever since he'd told her the truth about his nature.  As they entered her house, he began to speak.

 

"Kotomi chan," he began, "I have a rather large...  Well, let's call it a manufacturing base, under the city, also something of a bunker."

 

She blinked at him.

 

"Can I build an elevator to your house from it?"

 

"...An elevator?" she repeated before she brought a contemplative hand to her chin.  "...Can I go to your bunker?"

 

"You might not like the conditions," he said.  "It's rather warm down there.  That's because it’s very deep, nearly twenty four kilometers down.  It's also a bit loud; you can still hear the manufacturing plant.  That's twenty five kilometers down.  Good place for it though, as making a geothermal tap is a piece of cake."

 

It had been a monumental undertaking to build, too, to say the very least.  Fortunately, he was able to use the nanites to build tools to dig further down out of all the carbon in the soil.  The main problem had been power, but with time and an illegal tap into the electric grid, he'd been able to overcome that obstacle, at least long enough to set up a geothermal power source.

 

It had set him well and truly far back though.  Even though he'd had several years head start on his past self, he still had nowhere near the same numbers as his past self.  Fortunately, he knew what his past self would do, and a slight technological advantage to boot.  Loss ratios had been skewed out of his past self's favor to almost silly degrees.  It would still take almost everything he had though.  'Almost' being the key word.

 

"...I still want to see it," she said.

 

Okazaki smiled a little.  "Alright, then.  So I can build an elevator here then?"

 

She nodded with a smile.  "...Yes."

 

He nodded.  "Alright, I'll start immediately."  He smirked.  "Actually, I already started as soon as you said yes.  The equipment was already in place."

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki spent the rest of the day at Kotomi's house, explaining what certain parts that she had recovered from his arm did.  The conversation drifted to how he controlled the arm, and then to how he interfaced with machines in general.  Kotomi listened raptly, and soon began asking questions that he wouldn't have thought of.

 

It was fascinating to watch her extrapolate how he had gotten around some issue or another, sometimes in ways he hadn't thought of.  He began implementing some of the solutions she had come up with immediately as they talked.  He wondered, had he still had the brains that had come up with the technology in the first place, if he would have come up with those solutions on his own.

 

He couldn't be sure, though.  Dying had removed some of his best brains, brains that could make certain connections even better than his past self's brains could.  He mentally frowned at that; he was working with a handicap on that end of things.  It was yet another frustration to add to the growing list.

 

Time waited for no one however, and soon the day began to fade away.  He excused himself, much to Kotomi's disappointment, and noted that when he finished the elevator there would be no need for him to truly leave her house.  This prompted her to hug him, which in turn prompted a measure of dejection within Okazaki.  It was with mixed feelings that he returned to his house.

 

He returned to find a number of messages on the answering machine.  He hit the play button on the machine, and listened to the messages as he gave the house a quick once over.

 

The police had called again, wanting to know where they should send Naoyuki's body for the funeral.

 

Several funeral parlors had called as well, leaving short pricing lists which made him wince when he considered his budget.

 

Then there was a call from his 'grandmother', Shino, sending him reassurance about Naoyuki's death, and declaring that she would be taking care of the funeral.

 

Okazaki nodded to himself and called the police, giving them Shino's contact information before giving Shino herself a call.  She sounded tired, he reflected, as he exchanged greetings with her.  They talked briefly about what had happened, and she reassured him that she would take care of everything for him.  He thanked her, and offered his sympathies to her.

 

They continued to talk for a short while before she had to go, saying that she needed to finish making arrangements.  Okazaki thanked her again for taking care of things, and let her go before turning to his bed thoughtfully.  He felt sympathy for the woman; he knew it couldn't be easy to know that one's child had died before they had, but he also didn't really know what to do about it.

 

He only hoped that he could put a stop to such things after he had taken care of his past self; finally put the technology he had to good use and eliminate such things like that.

 

He went to bed.  He knew he'd have to face his dream again.  He also knew he didn't particularly want to do so.  He ground his teeth as he lie in bed and decided that he would do so the following night.  It wouldn't make much difference, and it would give himself some time to mentally prepare for it.

 

\----0----

 

The next day passed uneventfully with Okazaki spending most of his time dozing in the classroom.  When lunchtime had come, he had eaten in the cafeteria.  Instead of returning to his class after lunch was finished, he went to the library instead, hoping to find Kotomi.  She wasn't there.  He shrugged, and began walking back to his classroom.  On a lark, he decided to go by Class A on his way back.  As he passed the classroom, he peeked inside and wasn't particularly surprised to see Kotomi within.

 

He smiled sadly as he walked away from the room.  As much as he hated himself for it, he missed reading along with her in the library.  He shook the sensation off; the way things were was better by far than it could have been.  Kotomi now had other friends besides him; maybe they'd be enough to support her when she inevitably saw his true nature at work and rejected him.  He winced at the thought.  It may have been for the best, but it still hurt to think about.

 

He shook the thoughts out of his mind as he returned to class, and spent the rest of the day dozing.  When the final bell rang, he began working his way to the school gates.  He didn't make it out of the building, however, as his walk interrupted by a familiar voice.

 

"No matter how many times you come," he heard Tomoyo state with irritation, "my answer will be the same."

 

"Don't say that, please," pled a brown-eyed girl, who had short brown hair and was wearing a gi.  He recognized her as Hagiwara Chitose of the woman's Judo club.  "Please, Sakagami san.  Join the women's Judo club."

 

Standing beside her was the black haired, bearded, dark-eyed captain of the man's Judo Club, Yamaguchiya Fumihiro.  "As the men's Judo club president," he said, "I beg of you, as well.  If you join, the women's team would instantly become championship contenders."

 

Okazaki approached the scene with a measure of curiosity.

 

"I've told you many times that I have no intention of joining," Tomoyo replied with an annoyed tone.

 

"Problem?"  Okazaki asked.

 

Yamaguchiya looked up at Okazaki with a raised eyebrow.

 

"Okazaki, help me," Tomoyo pled.  "They're so persistent!"

 

"Okazaki," Yamaguchiya greeted with a furrowed brow.

 

"Yamaguchiya," Okazaki replied, and paused for a moment.  "It seems that you're trying to recruit someone that doesn't want to join your club.  _Again._ "

 

"Hmm," Yamaguchiya considered Okazaki with a raised eyebrow.  "I still want you to join the Judo club too."

 

"You know the deal," Okazaki said simply with a shrug.

 

Yamaguchiya's eye twitched before a light bulb seemed to form above his head.  "How about if we doubled the odds?  If I beat you, both you and Sakagami have to join the club?"

 

"Huh?" Tomoyo blinked and looked from Yamaguchiya to Okazaki and back.

 

"I believe that would be up to Sakagami, I think," Okazaki said.

 

"What's going on?" Tomoyo asked in confusion.

 

"Why don't you explain?" Okazaki asked Yamaguchiya.  "Since this new bit is your idea and all."

 

Yamaguchiya blinked and shrugged.  "For the last two years I've been trying to get Okazaki to join the Judo club.  His terms are that if I best him in a fight, he will join the Judo club."

 

"Okazaki kun." Tomoyo turned to Okazaki.  "Is this true?"

 

"It is," Okazaki admitted.

 

Tomoyo grabbed his arm and turned him away from the two Judo club presidents.  "Can you do it?" she asked him quietly.

 

"Well, I'm not in the Judo club still," Okazaki observed wryly.

 

"Hmm," Tomoyo seemed to think about it before shaking her head and turning back to the two presidents.  "I assume these are unofficial matches?"

 

"Of course," Yamaguchiya stated.

 

"Alright," Tomoyo stated.  "But only if I help."

 

"Huh?" was Okazaki's intelligent reply.

 

"But that would be two against one," Yamaguchiya noted.  "And as much as I hate to admit it, I've not won against Okazaki once.  With both of you..."

 

"Nevertheless, that is my price," Tomoyo stated calmly with her hands on her hips.

 

"Can I make note that you've said you're trying not to portray a violent image to the student body?" Okazaki noted flatly as he regarded Tomoyo.

 

"I can't let you face the captain of the Judo club alone," Tomoyo stated.  "Even if you're confident you can take him."

 

"But I can," Okazaki observed.  "Easily, even."

 

"Hey!" Yamaguchiya exhaled, fist in the air.

 

"But you know it's true," Okazaki noted, raising an eyebrow at Yamaguchiya.

 

Yamaguchiya, in turn, glared daggers at Okazaki for a moment before letting his fist fall with a sigh.  "Nevertheless," he said with a sigh.

 

"See, that attitude is why I oblige you," Okazaki observed.  "I respect someone that keeps going against the odds.  I'm being serious here.  Most would have given up by now, but you've kept trying and trying."

 

"Okazaki!" Tomoyo exclaimed with a mixture of surprise and irritation at Okazaki's blasé remarks.

 

"What?" Okazaki asked as he looked at her blankly.

 

"Show some respect," Tomoyo exclaimed.

 

Okazaki paused for a moment and sighed.  "Right, right, you're right.  Sorry, I'm not normally this much of an asshole."

 

"And watch your language Okazaki," Tomoyo scolded.

 

Okazaki regarded her with a raised eyebrow.  "...But..."  He sighed.  "...Never mind."

 

Yamaguchiya and Hagiwara looked at each other for a moment and then exchanged a nod.

 

"Okazaki san, Sakagami san, we have a condition of our own," Hagiwara stated.

 

"Two against one is in no way fair," Yamaguchiya stated.  "If both of you are to be fighting, then both of us will fight as well."

 

"If we're putting terms out, then allow me to add one additional one," Okazaki added.  "Normally I would be happy to continue obliging you until I graduated, but with Sakagami san involved, I think it's time to call this your last opportunity."

 

Okazaki folded his arms and looked at Yamaguchiya pointedly.  "I know you're an honorable man.  If you agree to this, then you must agree never to challenge me again.  Furthermore, you must agree that if we win, you will never trouble Sakagami san about joining the Judo club again.  Either of you.  Nor your subordinates.  Are these terms acceptable?"

 

Yamaguchiya contemplated it for a few seconds before nodding dejectedly.  "I agree to your terms, Okazaki."

 

"Hagiwara?" Okazaki stated as he gave her a pointed look.

 

"I accept!" she stated.

 

"And you, Sakagami san?" Okazaki asked, looking at her.

 

"The conditions are fair," Tomoyo stated.  "I accept as well."

 

\----0----

 

They met in the gym.  Tomoyo had changed out of her school uniform and into her more fighting-friendly gym outfit, and the group met in the center of the large room.  Yamaguchiya stared at Okazaki stoically as Okazaki returned the favor, while Hagiwara sneered at both Okazaki and Tomoyo.  Tomoyo glared at Hagiwara for a moment before regarding Yamaguchiya and Okazaki with a raised eyebrow.

 

"Right then," Okazaki said.  "The usual rules apply.  We keep going until someone gives up."

 

"Sounds good," Hagiwara stated smugly.

 

"Agreed," Yamaguchiya observed.

 

"I agree as well," Tomoyo stated.

 

"Very well then," Okazaki said.  "Let's bow, and fight."

 

Almost as one, the group bowed to one another.  Okazaki took up an almost normal standing stance while Yamaguchiya put his fists up in front of his face.

 

Yamaguchiya had long since given up on using traditional judo moves on Okazaki, which was vaguely disappointing to him, though he had to admit they were less than effective on someone with his upgrades.

 

Yamaguchiya approached cautiously and took a jab at Okazaki.

 

Okazaki normally would have dodged.  The fighting would have begun in earnest, with Yamaguchiya either missing entirely or landing only glancing blows on Okazaki, until Okazaki hit him a few times and maybe cracked a few of Yamaguchiya's ribs before forcing him to give up.

 

Yamaguchiya's fist hit Okazaki squarely in the nose.

 

Okazaki's head bent back ever so slightly, but he gave little evidence of any other kind that he had been hit.

 

Yamaguchiya blinked, then aimed another fist at Okazaki's head.  Then another.  Then he whirled around to give Okazaki a roundhouse kick to the head.

 

Okazaki let the kick turn his head toward Hagiwara and Tomoyo.

 

He watched Hagiwara fly away from Tomoyo, who had her leg raised as if she had just kicked her.  Hagiwara landed heavily and snarled at Tomoyo before charging.

 

 _'Not bad,'_ Okazaki thought as he turned his head to Yamaguchiya, doing his best _Terminator_ impression.  He smirked a little at Yamaguchiya, who in turn raised an eyebrow.  Okazaki moved forward, and Yamaguchiya brought up his arms to defend his torso.

 

Yamaguchiya almost had his block in place, but Okazaki's hand went under Yamaguchiya's arms and clasped on the front of Yamaguchiya's gi.  Okazaki lifted Yamaguchiya into the air, the taller man flailing his legs helplessly for a moment before he began to kick Okazaki in the torso.  Bloodthirsty urges started to take hold of Okazaki.

 

\----0----

_Yamaguchiya's kicks did no good as Okazaki pulled Yamaguchiya back as if to use him as a boxing glove before running forward and slamming him into a wall with a crunch.  Yamaguchiya's legs went limp even as he started coughing up blood, the result of shattered ribs and spine._

_Okazaki pulled Yamaguchiya back again, a savage grin on his face as he slammed him into the wall again.  He brought up his other hand and punched Yamaguchiya in the throat.  In, through, and into the wall behind.  He pulled his fist back and grabs Yamaguchiya’s newly-liberated head up before roaring in victory._

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki shook the urges off, and instead brought his other hand up to punch Yamaguchiya, relatively gently.  It was still hard enough to crack Yamaguchiya's ribs and send him flying away from Okazaki to land heavily on his back.  Okazaki took a moment to see how Tomoyo was doing.

 

Tomoyo and Hagiwara were grappling.  Hagiwara positioned herself to attempt an _osoto gari_ , a type of Judo throw, lifting her leg to bring behind Tomoyo's.  Tomoyo used the opportunity to push, sending Hagiwara to the floor.  Hagiwara rolled and pushed herself back up, an infuriated snarl on her face.

 

Okazaki shook his head as he looked back at Yamaguchiya.  He had stood up, and appeared to be ready for more in spite of his injuries.  Okazaki shrugged and leapt forward at him, caught him by the front of his gi again, and pushed.  Hard.  Yamaguchiya landed three meters away and skidded.

 

Okazaki, already moving forward, reached down to pluck him off the ground, a small, vicious smile threatening to take hold on his face.  More bloodthirsty urges threatened to take hold, and Okazaki expertly suppressed them.  Instead, he tossed Yamaguchiya relatively gently at the nearest wall.

 

Yamaguchiya hit the wall firmly, the air knocked out of him again and doubtlessly seeing stars from where his head hit the wall.  Okazaki was there an instant later, smacking his hands into the wall to stop himself.  He leapt backward again as Yamaguchiya rubbed the back of his head and coughed, leaning against the wall heavily.

 

"Yield," Okazaki commanded grimly.

 

"I yield," Yamaguchiya wheezed out before coughing.

 

Okazaki turned to Hagiwara and regarded the _uchi mata_ , inner thigh throw, which she had performed on Tomoyo.

 

Tomoyo hit the ground hard, but recovered quickly and drove both feet into Hagiwara's midsection, kicking her in Okazaki's general direction.

 

Okazaki moved to intercept the girl and snatched her out of the air before locking both of her arms in a full nelson.  He continued running forward a couple meters as he slowed down which made Hagiwara have to drag her feet against the ground somewhat.

 

"Yamaguchiya has yielded," Okazaki said.  "You are outnumbered, and in a lock.  I would suggest yielding."

 

Hagiwara snarled and tried to kick upward to push out of the lock, but Okazaki merely bent backward to where her feet couldn't touch the ground.

 

Tomoyo stood up and watched, a confused expression on her face until she looked around and saw Yamaguchiya slumped on the floor, who waved his hand at Tomoyo dejectedly.

 

Hagiwara screamed in fury, flailing her legs as she tried to escape the hold Okazaki had on her.

 

"Seriously, yield," Okazaki advised; he was in no danger of either dropping her or having her wriggle out of the lock.

 

Hagiwara yelled a couple more times infuriatedly.

 

"Okazaki, let her go," Tomoyo said.

 

"But if she yields, this whole thing's over," Okazaki said.  "Just let her get tired."

 

"It's not fair though," Tomoyo stated firmly.

 

Hagiwara panted in his arms tiredly.  "No, I agreed to these terms, damn it," she breathed out as she went limp.  "I yield."

 

Okazaki leaned back forward to put her on her feet and let go.

 

"Besides," Hagiwara pointed toward the gym door where Oogami, the gym instructor, was approaching fast.

 

Oogami looked around the gym with an exasperated expression.  "This again, Okazaki?"

 

"Yup," Okazaki replied.

 

Oogami regarded Tomoyo and Hagiwara with a raised eyebrow.  "Are you trying to get more people in trouble?"

 

Okazaki began thinking quickly.  "She's just an observer."  He gestured toward Tomoyo.  "Well, more like a referee since it's two against one this time."

 

"You know, I don't want to know," Oogami observed with a sigh.  "Come here, Okazaki."

 

Okazaki complied.

 

Oogami leaned over toward Okazaki conspiratorially and spoke quietly.  "The projector in class D got hit by one of the students and is more or less completely broken.  Can you fix it?"

 

"Of course," Okazaki replied equally quietly.  "Just drop it off by my house."

 

Oogami sighed again.  "Hagiwara." Oogami turned to the girl in question.  "You have detention today.  Yamaguchiya you have detention for the next week, since I told you to stop this already.  And go to the nurses office,  You look like you've gotten cracked ribs again.  Okazaki..."  Oogami crossed his arms and frowned at him.  "The usual.  Three days’ suspension."

 

"Okazaki!" exclaimed Tomoyo under her breath as she watched.

 

"Alright," Okazaki said.

 

Oogami shook his head at the students.  "Alright, classes are over anyway.  Get outta here, Okazaki, I don't want to see your face."


	18. Veni, Vidi, Vici, Part 2

Tomoyo told Okazaki to wait for her at the gym exit while she changed back into her uniform.  Okazaki had complied with a mental shrug and leaned against the wall next to the outer gym door.

 

"Well, that went well," Okazaki admitted with an amused smile as Tomoyo exited the gym.

 

"What do you mean?"  Tomoyo glared at him.  "You're suspended!  And not for the first time, by the sound of it!"

 

"Immaterial."

 

"How do you expect to graduate if you keep getting suspended!"  She paused, as if a thought had just occurred to her.  "...Don't they usually expel students after the _first_ three-day suspension?"

 

"I do too well in classes for them to do so," he admitted.  "It would look really bad for them if they had to expel me.  Plus, I fix their broken stuff.  Between those two things, they give me a lot of leeway."

 

"What?"  She raised an eyebrow at him.  "You mean to say you _bribe_ them to keep from being expelled?"

 

"Not how I would put it, but... yes."

 

"That's despicable!"

 

"It's not like I go out of my way to cause trouble.  It just tends to follow me.  Admittedly, that's my own fault, but still."

 

"That's because you keep picking fights.  Am I right?"

 

"Pretty much, yeah," Okazaki admitted.

 

Tomoyo shook her head.  "Wouldn't that be going out of your way to cause trouble?" she noted with a frown.

 

"On the contrary.  That's not going out of my way at all.  That's just me being me."

 

"You're causing everyone else trouble."

 

"Am I now?  I doubt anything's going into the records officially, so it's not reflecting badly on the school itself.  They get something fixed, and I..."  He chuckled for a moment mirthlessly.  "And I get to sit at home three days.  Everyone wins." _'Except it gets a bit lonely at the house these days, particularly with Naoyuki gone.'_   He sighed.

 

Tomoyo was quiet for a few moments at Okazaki's reaction.  "So, why did you cover for me?" she finally asked.

 

"Because you're running for student council president.  Getting detention while working on that wouldn't look good, I think.  I can afford it considerably better than you can."

 

"Because you bribe the school."

 

"It sounds like such a bad thing when you put it that way," he said wryly.  "Let's just say we have a mutually beneficial relationship when it comes to that sort of thing."

 

"...Now it sounds sleazy as well as despicable," she said as they passed the school gates and began walking down the sakura-lined path toward his house.

 

"Look, seriously, it's not like I do it on purpose.  Hell, it wasn't even my idea in the first place."

 

"What do you mean it wasn't your idea?" Tomoyo asked, apparently unbothered by Okazaki's language once off of school grounds.

 

"Well, let's just say that after it became apparent this sort of thing would happen a lot, somehow it got to the teachers that I can fix about anything," Okazaki replied.  And it wasn't even his fault, either; he still didn't know how that had made it into Koumura's ear.  _'That old coot was really clever about that, too.'_

 

"And now you get in trouble and they just hand you something to fix?"

 

"In a nutshell."

 

"I really should do something about that, but given as you're helping me, I feel compelled to let it slide," Tomoyo said.  "This one time, anyway."

 

Okazaki hid an amused grin.  "On a related note, I've been meaning to ask: why are you going for student council president, anyway?"

 

"Right, I haven't told you about it yet," she said and then paused to look at the trees lining the path.  "I want to preserve the Sakura trees here."

 

He blinked.  _'Well that explains why I've been making that bloody huge thing.'_

 

"There's a plan to cut them all down," she continued with a sad expression.  "The students that know about it don't like the idea.  People living around here are against it, as well."  She turned to regard him with a smile.  "If I become the student council president of this school, I can act to preserve these Sakura trees."

 

"Hm," he grunted.  "A noble goal."

 

"Thank you," Tomoyo said.  "It's why I transferred here in the first place."

 

"Really now?"  Okazaki regarded her with a raised eyebrow.

 

"Yeah.  I wanted to preserve this place no matter what."  She looked at the trees with a fond smile.  "It's a very important place."

 

He considered her statement as they continued walking down the path.  She didn't speak for some time, and he watched the trees as they passed them.  It really was a nice place, he reflected.  Serene.  He could see how someone could become attached to it and not want to see it destroyed.

 

He couldn't shake the feeling there was something missing from the story however.  To transfer schools just to save it was a touch excessive, at least in his opinion, at least for someone who seemed to be relatively stable like Tomoyo.  He wouldn't put it past some people to do so, but those that would,  he reckoned, also tended to be one card short of a full deck.

 

"What were you like as a child?" Tomoyo said as they neared the end of the path, taking Okazaki by surprise.

 

"Hmm."  He considered the question.  What did he remember of his childhood?  Reading an astrophysics textbook and even understanding a few things in it.  And hitting other kids, only sometimes with good reason.  "Well, hmm...  Precocious.  And angry."

 

She turned to consider him for a moment before she continued walking, a small, sad smile on her face.  "Maybe you can relate somewhat, then.  What do you think people become... or rather, what do you think keeps people from going wild?"

 

"Hmm, interesting question," he said with a sigh.  He thought about the question and rubbed his chin.  "Well, I suppose there are a variety of things that can keep a person from 'going wild,' as you put it, but...  Hm, the usual answer is probably family; they are there from the start, usually, and can help someone keep control of him or herself.  Of course, they can also be what drives you to be wild as well; in which case, friends."

 

He scratched his cheek pensively.  Thinking about it, in his first life his parents, or at least his mother had held him in check for much of it.  His father, on the other hand, tended to make him want to kill something, even after the old man had divorced his mother and left.  _'I guess I got it both ways then,'_ he thought.

 

"A very good answer," Tomoyo said as she regarded him with a raised eyebrow.  "'Family' is the answer I came up with is well and for the same reasons.  And friends can be considered family as well, I think."  She paused as they passed the end of the sakura tree path.

 

"My parents didn't get along," she admitted.  "Inside my house was totally cold, and there were no conversations.  Not even any arguments.  Neither had done anything wrong.  But I'm sure small misunderstandings and hardships accumulated, and eventually things no longer clicked."

 

She frowned.  "I had gone wild for a long time.  I forced my anger and irritation on anyone and everyone.  I was a weak person.  The one who woke me up was..."  She paused again, a small grimace on her face.  "...My younger brother, Takafumi.  Quiet, moderate, and a kind guy.  But I wasn't a good sister at all.  I'd never seen him smile."  She paused and took a deep breath.

 

"Two years ago, my parents were going to get divorced," she continued.  "They fought over who'd take the children.  I didn't care how it ended.  But Takafumi didn't want that.  He didn't want to go to with either one.  It was the first time he said anything like that.  And..."  She trailed off and stopped walking, leaning against a nearby street lamp.  "He ran away from us and...  We found him at a bridge over the river near our house."

 

Okazaki blinked.  "Are you saying that he..."

 

"Yeah," Tomoyo said.  "He said he'd jump if they were going to get divorced.  And he really did.  I don't have a clue why he did that.  It's not as though he wanted to die.  I don't think he even understood the rationale behind it.  But with him doing that, we finally became a family.  He was ice cold, and we thought there was nothing we could do."

 

She paused again and wiped away a tear from her eye.  "When spring came, he was finally discharged, and we walked down the road.  He said to me...  'I want to come and see these Sakura every year with everyone, as a family.'  I...  And my parents all felt the same way."

 

"...That explains much," he admitted gravely after a few seconds.

 

"Yeah.  Though the city may change, there are many people who treasure these Sakura trees.  Not just me.  Many people who live in this city feel that way.  No matter how depressing a place may look, the most important places don't change."

 

As he looked out at the city, his mind's eye took hold, and all he could see were the fires.  The city had _burned_.  The most important places were simply _gone_ afterward.  The thought occurred to him that he may still have successfully saved the sakura trees though.  It was something, at least.

 

"I think there's a similar aspect to family, as well," Tomoyo stated.

 

"Hm," Okazaki grunted, the light of a thousand fires sparked by an atomic bomb sparkling in his eyes.

 

\----0----

 

"Oh, this is where you live?" Tomoyo asked.

 

"That's right," Okazaki stated.

 

"It's right on my way to class."

 

"Oh?"  He turned to her.  "Where do you live, then?"

 

"About three blocks that way," she said as she pointed away from the school.

 

"Huh," he said.  "...I'm surprised I haven't seen you before now then."

 

"...That is unusual," she said as she rested a finger on her chin.  "Okazaki, you are coming to class on time, aren't you?"

 

"On occasion," he replied.

 

"That will not do," she stated firmly.  "I cannot allow a friend to be constantly tardy."

 

"...You know, I've been trying to be _less_ punctual.  It's good to try to kill old habits sometimes."

 

"Punctuality is important," Tomoyo countered.  "How can anyone rely on you if you aren't punctual?"

 

"While a salient point," Okazaki said, "there can be the problem of being _too_ punctual.  You can become set in your ways if you are always punctual.  And when things fail to go to plan you end up having trouble adapting because of that."

 

"But most of that's not related to punctuality at all," she noted with mild irritation.  "I think you're just dodging the issue."

 

"Normally you would be right, at least about that and punctuality not being related," he said.  "But on the other hand, maybe they are directly related.  Consider this: someone goes to school every day, never misses class at all.  He or she gets used to that daily schedule.  Circumstances change, and the previous schedule becomes a liability.  Say, the result of classes being held at different hours, for example.  But if one is stuck on the previous schedule, he or she might have difficulties changing.  He or she would benefit from the extra sleep in the morning, but he or she ends up waking early instead.  One would benefit from extra time to do your homework, but one ends up falling asleep trying.  One tries doing one’s homework in the morning, but the loses his or her train of thought because one thinks one should be going somewhere, and one’s homework ends up being full of mistakes when turned in.  The individual fails the class, and all of a sudden his or her scholastic career is down the tubes."

 

"...Now I know you're just dodging the issue," Tomoyo said with a flat glare.

 

"...I'll admit the example is rather bad," he replied sheepishly.  "It was all I could think of off the top of my head."

 

"So you _are_ dodging the issue!" she exclaimed with a frown.

 

"Well, no," Okazaki said.  "It's just that...  Well, I'd rather not cite real examples... yet, at least."

 

"What's that supposed to mean?" she complained.

 

He sighed.  "Look, it's complicated... and rather personal to me.  Can I ask that you just leave it be for now?  I promise, I'll explain."

 

"...You're a frustrating person to talk to sometimes," Tomoyo noted with a scowl.  "But very well.  I won't pry into your personal business.  However..."  She pointed her index finger at him.  "I'm still going to see that you are punctual."

 

"But..." he began to retort before mentally shrugging.  "Oh, whatever."

 

"I will be over tomorrow to make sure you are up at a proper time," she stated matter-of-factly.  "Be prepared for my arrival."

 

"Even while I am on suspension?" Okazaki replied with amusement.

 

" _Particularly_ since you are on suspension," Tomoyo countered.

 

\----0----

 

Tomoyo left shortly thereafter, and Okazaki stepped inside the house and sat by the door.  He didn't have to wait long before he heard someone pull up outside his house.  He opened the door to see Oogami step out of his car with a projector under his arm and a frown on his face.

 

"Okazaki," Oogami greeted with a nod as he stepped up to the door.

 

"Oogami san," Okazaki returned with a respectful nod.

 

"I heard about your father when I reported the incident," Oogami observed.  "May I come in?"

 

"By all means," Okazaki stated as he stepped out of the way so Oogami could enter.  "I'd offer you a drink, but you drove here."

 

"You aren't drinking, are you, Okazaki?" Oogami regarded him with a frown.

 

"Never been my thing," Okazaki observed with half a smile.  "Still, I'm sure Naoyuki had something tucked away..."  He sighed.

 

"I'm sorry for your loss," Oogami said.  "When's the funeral to be held?"

 

"I'm not sure," Okazaki admitted.  "My grandmother is handling that end of things."

 

"...Normally I wouldn't offer this," Oogami began, "but under the circumstances...  If you need it, there are a few empty rooms in the sports dormitory you can move into if you need to."

 

"I appreciate your kind offer," Okazaki said with honest appreciation before bowing respectfully.  "I am touched that you would make it.  However, I must decline nevertheless."

 

"Are you sure?" Oogami asked with a raised eyebrow since Okazaki’s actions were normally irreverent.

 

"I am," Okazaki replied as he stood back up.  "But I do sincerely thank you for making the offer."  He paused for a moment and motioned at the broken projector.  "Ah...  But on the subject of your visit, how bad is it?"

 

"Pretty bad," Oogami admitted with a touch of amusement as he handed the device to Okazaki.  "Not sure what Chikamatsu was thinking, playing around like that...  Somehow managed to hit it with his head while jumping around on desks during homeroom."

 

"Doing _what?_ " Okazaki asked flatly.

 

"That was my thoughts exactly when I heard about it," Oogami replied.  "I had to leave the room for a moment and when I came back, there was a broken projector and Chikamatsu nursing a concussion.  Swear that boy's got more bone than brain cells up there..."

 

Okazaki shook his head.  "Heh, some people are like that," he observed wryly.  "One of your homeroom students, I take?"

 

"Huh?  Oh yeah, that's right; you wouldn't know him," Oogami stated.  "Yeah, one of my homeroom students.  Come to think of it, I think he's the one that broke that thing last time too."

 

"Are you sure he just doesn't have some sort of vendetta on projectors?" Okazaki asked with a smirk.

 

"Ah, I don't know," Oogami replied as he shook his head.  "I'll be glad to have him out of my class, though, one way or another."

 

"Now, now; you shouldn't talk about your students like that," Okazaki noted with amusement.  "Particularly to other students."

 

"Huh?"  Oogami blinked.  "Oh.  Damn it, I keep forgetting that you're still a student, somehow."

 

Okazaki waved it off with a smile.  "Ah, don't worry about it," he said.  "I'm not going to tell anyone."

 

"Good."

 

"I'll see what I can do with it," Okazaki said as he motioned his head toward the projector in his hands.

 

"Well, alright," Oogami said.  "I'll be back day after tomorrow, then."

 

Okazaki nodded.  "Sounds good.”

 

"Well, I'd better go.  Thanks for taking care of this for me."

 

"Hey, not a problem.  Happy to help."

 

"And happy to not be expelled too," Oogami noted with a smirk.

 

"That, too," Okazaki agreed with amusement.

 

"Next time try not to hit him so hard," Oogami said.  "You broke three of his ribs."

 

"Well, on the plus side, there will be no next time.  I got him to agree to stop challenging me."

 

Oogami shook his head.  "You really shouldn't have suggested that in the first place."

 

Okazaki sighed.  "I apologize for that.  But I just can't resist a good fight."

 

"Then why didn't you join the Judo club?" Oogami asked.

 

"It just isn't my thing honestly," Okazaki said with a shrug.

 

Oogami shook his head again and opened the door before he turned back to Okazaki for a moment.  "You're going to have to either learn to stop fighting or join a martial arts dojo," he said.  "You're never going to fit into society otherwise."

 

"Perhaps," Okazaki admitted with a shrug.  "No, probably."  He sighed.  "I'll give it some thought," he lied.  His course was set.  Old habits die hard, after all.

 

"You do that," Oogami said.  "I'll be back in a couple days.  See ya."

 

"Later," Okazaki replied as Oogami closed the door behind him.  Okazaki sighed and took the projector to his room, where he disassembled it and let the broken components disappear into the interior of the desk.  Nanites were good for many things, and repairing items was just one thing that he could do with them.  He let them begin to affect repairs on the broken projector pieces and sat on the bed to think.

 

He distracted himself with thoughts of his past self.  All too soon he would have to begin facing him, with his first real encounter not even a month away.  After that had happened, he had ended up panicking and stepping his game plan up, knowing he was facing someone like himself in the east and not wanting to have to fight on two fronts at once.  Not that facing himself without distraction had saved him, of course.

 

Less than a month to send himself into a panic and start his plans early.  Almost nine months before his past self effectively won the war in the western hemisphere, and he would strike at his past self in earnest while he was still weak from that.  A bit under a year before Hikarizaka city was touched with nuclear fire in a last, desperate attempt to strike his power base.  Things had escalated quickly.

 

He hoped he would be able to be able to fix the inevitable atmospheric damage the large-scale nuclear exchange would cause; the last reports he had received before he had died had told him that the ozone layer had been depleted almost entirely, and some plants and animals were already showing deleterious effects from overexposure to ultraviolet radiation.

 

Doubtlessly, the people that survived would also suffer damaging aftereffects if he wasn't able to handle the results of the bombardment, though he did have a contingency plan in place.  His bunkers did include fully-stocked seed and genetic material banks, and nanotechnology could 'grow' food for those inside it if a worst case scenario unfolded.  He hoped that wouldn't be the case however.

 

His thoughts drifted.  He hoped his friends would survive.  He'd already lost his first set of friends when the war in America took a turn for the worse.  The Americans had gotten, would get desperate and unleash their nuclear arsenal on his bases, including the one he had persuaded his past friends to ride out his war in for the sake of 'safety'.  He winced as he thought about their deaths.

 

It had been a turning point in the war where it could be said that he had 'completely lost his shit' for a time and rendered the greater American continent more or less uninhabitable with his return exchange.  He didn't know what he would do if something like that happened to his new friends.  Or heavens forbid, if something happened to Kotomi.

 

He frowned at the thought of her.  Many things he felt he knew how to handle.  The budding relationship with Kotomi was not one of those things.  Even looking back on it, he couldn't figure out how it had happened.  It was something that should not, could not be, and yet...  There it was.  He enjoyed being around the girl, more than he knew he should.

 

She seemed to enjoy his company too, at least while his future actions seemed ambiguous and remote.  He wasn't sure how she would react when she learned the cold, hard truth of the matter, of how he had done little better than outright murder a hefty percentage of the world's population, and had personally invaded and destroyed the minds of thousands, but he knew it couldn't be good.

 

It would hurt him certainly, which he could handle, but it would hurt her as well.  He ground his teeth at the thought.  It was a genuine no-win situation; no matter what he did, she would be hurt by it.  Even so, even as he thought about the situation...  He found to his frustration that he genuinely missed Kotomi, even though it hadn't even been a day yet.  He rubbed his eyes with a grimace, though it brought him no relief.

 

He finally went to bed with his feelings for Kotomi on his mind.  He did his best to turn his thoughts over to what he needed to do.  That woman in his dream...  He did not relish the idea of facing her, even as he switched all processes he could over to automatic and halted what remained.

 

His brains began falling, one by one, into a sleep cycle, both naturally and artificially induced.  EEG monitors were activated to help keep proper gauge of his wakefulness states.  He set timers to wake his forms up in fifteen minutes, not permitting a longer period of time to go on what amounted as a simple scouting mission into the center of his mind.  The brain housed in the form that lived in Okazaki's house was the last one to fall asleep.

 

A true sleep, unlike what he had experienced in over nine years.

 

He dreamed.

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A Note From The Author:**

 

I’d like to start off by thanking Darkin420 and LyingOwlLyla for betaing these two chapters for me.  Thank you both, so much.  :)

 

I’d also like to thank everyone who’s read and reviewed so far.  You’re all awesome.  But particularly awesome are those who have reviewed outside of RT.  I’m looking at you, RedHeadedMarina and LyingOwlLyla.  ;)

 

And to the rest of you who have read this far, I thank you too, for sticking with it.  But why not leave a review or something, eh?  :P  Can’t hurt, and I’d love to see your opinions.

 

As a final thought...  TIME TRAVEL TENSE TROUBLE!  Why you so tricky sometimes?!?


	19. Caught In A Moment, Part 1

**A Note From The Author:**

 

So, I thought I’d do something special for new years day, and actually, you know...  Release this new chapter, right at the crack of it.  Seems fitting, somehow.  Anyway.  Enjoy, eh?  :D

 

**-0-0-0-0-0-0-**

 

In his past life, Okazaki had needed glasses.  Strong ones toward the end of his unaugmented life.  He remembered each time he got new glasses, how the world would seem so vibrant and real compared to how it had been before.

 

This new world wasn't like that.  It was perhaps like the first time he had ever gotten glasses.  Or even beyond that.  Everything seemed impossibly vibrant.  Impossibly real.

 

A 'real' so real it circled in upon itself and became surreal instead.

 

It had been that way before, too, but his mind had trouble pulling the details of his past escapades here, or even many of the core concepts that he felt he should remember.  He had just been left with that sense of impossible reality and painful malice from the main occupant of this realm.

 

He couldn't say that he 'looked' for he no longer had eyes with which to see.  But he still saw, all the same.  In all directions.  If it weren't for his experience of seeing from multiple perspectives at once, he would surely have been lost, unable to comprehend the new reality he was subjected to.  As it stood, it was merely very confusing.

 

Most confusing were the balls of light that seemed to pepper the place, which reminded him of snow during a blizzard.  Unlike a blizzard, they floated in contradiction to gravity, their paths taking them upward to parts unknown.

 

Focusing on one brought further oddness; he could, after a fashion, 'feel' waves of emotion coming off of it.  He was glad he couldn't see the woman in question; his recollection was foggy, but he remembered what it had been like to gaze upon her.  Like having a needle scratch his very soul.

 

That wasn't to say that he didn't know approximately where she was.  He himself, no longer capable of standing due to the lack of proper legs, hovered above a hilly, grassy field.  Here and there, metal machine parts could be found atop the grass, no particular order or perceivable reason for their presence to be found.  The sky was cloudy and blue, a particular shade of blue that he was certain did not exist outside of his dreamscape.

 

A house, only barely removed from a shed, stood upon one of the hills.  There was nothing out of the ordinary about it, or at least out of the ordinary when compared to the fantastic realm he was in, but he still mentally recoiled slightly any time he focused upon it.  He wasn’t sure, but he suspected the woman would almost certainly be found within.

 

He turned his attention to the house.  The urge to flee was strong, and found himself hovering away from it.  The action confused him _.  'Why am I floating away from it?  I need to get there.'_   Lost in his confusion, it took him a moment to realize he was no longer moving away.

 

 _'Ah?  What's this?'_   He focused his attention on the house again.  Again he felt the urge to flee.  Again he moved away from the house.  _'Wait.'_

 

He directed his attention to one of the metal portions laying on the ground.  He made himself want to take a closer look.  He moved toward it.  _'Ah.'_ He focused his attention on the house, and drove thoughts of flight from his mind.

 

He did not move.  _'Right.'_   He made himself want to go to the house, and he moved toward the house.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki knew the house hadn't always been in the same form as what stood before him.  He didn't know how he knew, but he knew.  For one thing, he was almost certain that, at one point, it had been more Japanese style, with a large paper screen window on the side he faced.

 

There was still a window.  A rough window, boarded up on the inside, western in style.

 

He also remembered, somehow, that it had looked almost like a small apartment at one point.  While not in the best of shape, it had still seemed sturdy enough, something a person could live in without fear that the lightest breeze would send the whole thing down upon them.

 

What stood before him could make no such claims, and looked as though it was held together by force of will alone.

 

From what he remembered of the inhabitant, maybe that was truly the case, too.

 

As he approached the door, it opened.  A sensation, one that vaguely that reminded him of that peculiar itching pain one felt in one’s teeth when someone dragged their nails across a chalkboard, caused his form to shudder as he regarded the inhabitant of the shack.  He moved away for a moment before collecting himself and facing the occupant of the shack, the queen of this world.

 

"Welcome back," said the inhabitant of the shed emotionlessly in English.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki realized very quickly that there was a vital limitation to the form he was in.  He couldn't speak.  He couldn't communicate with this woman who stood in front of him, whom looked subtly wrong to him in a way he couldn't quite place.

 

And that was disregarding her _strong_ resemblance to Furukawa Nagisa.  The same golden eyes.  The same auburn hair.  She wasn't her twin, but she could be her sister.  Or mother, perhaps, if he didn't already know her mother.

 

"Come in," said the woman.  "You are just in time.  For what little time counts in this place."

 

If he had eyes, he would have blinked.  Of course, if he had a body, he was sure he would be writhing from the sensation of fire touching his very soul.

 

He went in.  There was a table present, along with a couple chairs.  They appeared as worn down and untrustworthy as the shack itself.

 

A small robot, which had every appearance of having been constructed out of all the junk that seemed to occur naturally around the place, reached over and swatted at Okazaki.

 

Its metal hand went through Okazaki, but that did not stop him from sensing the furious and strangely protective intent behind the attempted blow.

 

The robot attempted several times more the same act before the woman put a hand on top of its head.  The movement was fluid, beyond what humans were capable of.  Beyond even what he was capable of in spite of his mechanical grace.  It was a fluidity that was disturbing in its perfection.

 

"Still your hand, father," she said.  "You cannot harm him that way."  She turned to Okazaki, a subtly murderous gleam in her eye.  "I would have already done so if it were possible."

 

The robot took a few steps backward and focused intently on Okazaki.

 

He returned the favor.  It took away some of the pain the woman's presence subjected him to.

 

"Now then," she said.  "Since I am certain I have your undivided attention, let me tell you a story."  She paused and regarded Okazaki with a subtle narrowing of her eyes.  "Once, there was an Okazaki Tomoya that wasn't you.  An Okazaki Tomoya that married Furukawa Nagisa and had a child named Okazaki Ushio."

 

He realized that he had heard the name somewhere before.  Likely during the last time he was here, when he was unmodified.  Realization dawned on him.  That's what she had called herself back then.  Ushio.

 

Ushio continued.  "Familiar sounding name, isn't it?  We were a happy family, though both mother and myself were very weak."  She frowned.  "In fact, there was a reality where mother died giving birth to me.  Five years later, I died too, along with father.

 

"But I was able to bring us back, back to the time of my birth.  Back in time to make sure my mother lived through it, meaning the circumstances behind my death never occurred.  It's a pattern that has repeated itself ad infinatum across the multiverse, infinite variations of our family living out our lives, infinite variations of this world outside of normal reality."

 

"There was a problem though," she said and glared bitterly at him, her voice subtly furious.  "In some of these variations, there existed a vengeful little man with delusions of grandeur.  A vengeful little man that happened to get lucky and get inducted into an experimental program in a small subset of those variations.  You even survived the initial procedure in many of those remaining universal variants.

 

"Which is a shame really, considering what you did afterward.  Now, let me tell you something else.  Normally, in all of the universes where my mother and father exist, they could have been contemporaries of your past self.  It's not exact, but they would have been born around when you would have.  I was in my thirties when you struck, settling down with a husband of my own.  Do you know what happened?"

 

Okazaki had a sudden idea of what must have happened.  A reality where he had all the time he had sought.  A reality where he didn't have to rush to try to secure the future.  He had planned very well.  Almost certainly...

 

"I'll tell you what happened," she went on as the rage in her voice grew.  "You won.  Decisively, even.  But there was one thing you couldn't control, and that was that not everyone liked that.  Some didn't agree with your views.  Some just couldn't stomach being led by the one who defeated their country.  Others..."  She paused, and a bitter frown made its way onto her face to match her glare.

 

"Others had more personal reasons to fight you.  My father and my husband both joined the defense force and fought you.  Both of them died.  Mother was so distraught that she lost her will to live.  I had to watch her die in front of me.  I was devastated.  I didn't know what to do, but I knew one thing, and that was that I hated you.  Hated you beyond anything I had ever felt before.  So I fought you, too."

 

Her expression went blank, as did her tone.  "And you know what?  We lost.  There was no chance for us to kill you where the combined might of the earth's militaries had failed.  You thought there were more, and so you _raped my mind_ to find out."

 

The cold, matter of fact tone she said it in made her words all the more terrible to him.  He could see it.  Any attempt to take over the world by force would inevitably end up with its share morally questionable events and dark secrets.  The path he had chosen was no different, and arguably was one of the darker paths.  Returning to at least somewhat ethical actions after having eaten so many minds already...

 

He would have continued.  And continued.  And sooner or later, if he didn't catch himself somehow, he would become big brother.  Or worse.  He had hoped he would be able to break himself off of that path.  Seemed he had been unable to.  And it all came down in the end to him violating someone's mind, just to find out what was doubtless relatively unimportant information.  He wished he could see that as a step he would be unwilling to take.

 

But he knew himself too well.  What was one more mind when you had consumed hundreds of thousands?  He could be the poster boy of the 'slippery slope' concept sometimes.

 

"It nearly destroyed me," she said after a few moments.  "Our souls, for a moment, were forcibly joined, and a small part of you crossed over, started changing me.  A little longer, and I would have just been a part of you.  But I was special.  I had been dead, before.  I was still, to some degree, linked to this realm. 

 

"It let me see a great many things.  Like other realities, where you were left to your own devices.  Let me see how you would slowly go insane and ultimately kill everyone and everything.  More importantly though, I was able to see how you could still be stopped.  Saw realities where you were defeated.  And in that instant I was able to bring that back with me.

 

"You died, right down to every last brain and every last neuron.  And so did I.  And I found myself back, in this alternate world.  And I found you, or rather what you might term your soul.

 

"When you changed yourself like that, you rendered your soul... different.  I could tell you no longer could forget what had happened to you in your past life.  People are meant to be reborn.  You would be reborn.  With all the knowledge you had accumulated.  I couldn't let you loose on the universe again.  So I tried to destroy your soul.

 

"It was impossible, though," Ushio said as she glared at him, "When you changed yourself like that, it also rendered your soul effectively immortal.  I did find that I was able to send you away, very far away, into an entirely different set of realities.  But there were still the realities where you persisted.  And I found a way to loop one of them in on itself."

 

Okazaki began to suspect that something was amiss.  It would explain so much.  Too much, really.  Was this all simply a strange dream, a product of the way he had modified himself?  A dream where his subconscious tried to explain to himself what it thought had happened to him, in a way more direct than it had been able to previously?

 

Such a vivid dream seemed impossible though.

 

But by the same token, his existence, what had happened to him, seemed equally impossible, and yet he could not deny that he had been reborn.

 

A time loop.  Get killed, be reborn, kill past self so he can be reborn to kill his past self, so on and so forth.  Maybe he just didn't want to believe it could have been an intentional work.

 

"I'm surprised you haven't said anything yet," Ushio said after a long moment, then raised an eyebrow at him.  "Unless...  Ah.  You have forgotten, haven't you?  I cannot teach you how, you taught yourself the first time you were here.  Took you a very long time, I recall."

 

She smiled coldly at him.  "That's alright.  There is plenty of time here.  All the time in the world.  I am certain you will learn again."

 

 _'Speaking of time,'_ Okazaki thought, _'hasn't it been at least 15 minutes since I got here?  What's going on?'_  He willed himself to wake up, hoping it would work.

 

He woke up.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki roused, and the first thing he did was check the timers he had left.  A couple of seconds had passed.  He checked the time.  Similar result.  He checked this with external time servers.  He scanned the EEG time readings last.  He frowned, the conclusion inescapable.

 

He hadn't slept more than a second at the most.  He was aware that there was some level of time flowing more slowly involved with dreams, but that seemed excessive.  He regarded the ceiling with a frown.

 

 _'All the time in the world,'_ he thought _.  'How true, in that event.  This calls for experimentation, but...'_   He involuntarily shuddered before clenching his fist in irritation. _'...But nothing!  Damn it all!  Face your fears, man!  Go back.'_

 

He closed his eyes and fell back to sleep.

 

\----0----

 

"Welcome back," Ushio said.

 

Okazaki's form shuddered slightly as he focused at her, the sensation of having the outer layers of his soul flayed off more than he could bear without reaction.  He tried to focus on something other than the woman.  He was still in the house.  The robot wasn't there.  He focused instead on the rickety looking table instead.

 

"You're bigger than the other spirits here," she said.  "You used that before to stretch into letters, so that we could talk.  I very much want to hear your plans, now that you've had time to contemplate my words.  Do you still plan to go forth and conquer?  Or will you stay your hand?"

 

He would have frowned, had he the lips with which to do so.  How long had passed here in the few seconds he had been awake?  Did time even work like that here?  He mentally shrugged and hovered out the door.

 

"Take your time..." he heard Ushio say from the shack behind him.  "There is plenty of time here.  Not time enough to forget, or even forgive....  But time enough to accept, perhaps.  I am patient."


	20. Caught In A Moment, Part 2

Okazaki floated around and tried to generate a mental survey of the land that he was in.  It was less than useful, as all of the land he traveled was the same.  Rolling hills covered in grass, with parts from broken-down machines scattered here and there to add variety.

 

He had started out at first using those machine parts as improvised landmarks, but found that act unnecessary; if he wanted to return, he found he always knew what direction the shack was in.  It was convenient, but it made him wonder about the nature of the realm he was in.

 

A realm of nothing.  A world that had ended.  Stagnant.  Barren.  Focused solely on Ushio, sole speaking inhabitant.  Maybe not the sole speaking inhabitant for long though, if he could work out a way to speak here himself, as he had apparently done before.

 

He continued to explore.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki found something different.  A pool of water.  He could see himself at last.

 

His form was like one of the balls of light that floated up toward the sky.  But the difference was obvious whenever one floated past him.  Whatever he was, whatever they were, he was huge in comparison.  _'Bigger than the other spirits here indeed,'_ he thought.  Ushio had called them souls.  Souls of those living?  Or souls of those dead?  She hadn't said.  He had died once before, so maybe it could be either.

 

Of course, he could also be reading too much into things as well.  Wouldn't be the first time.  Regardless, it did not explain the difference in scale.  If they were souls....

 

The answer came to him rather suddenly.  ' _How many bodies do I inhabit?  How many brains?  Could such a thing stretch a soul?  What of those whose minds I ate?  Ushio stated that we touched souls for an instant, that I almost absorbed her soul.  Could that have a similar effect?'_

 

He didn't know.  It was as good a working theory as any, though.  He put it out of mind for the time being, and began to try to stretch himself, using the water's mirror-like surface to gauge his effectiveness.

 

\----0----

 

 _'Stretch the soul,'_ Okazaki thought.  He had been trying.  Unsuccessfully.  He wasn't sure how long he'd been attempting.  Days, certainly.  Weeks, most likely.  Months, perhaps.  It was impossible to tell.  There was nothing to aid in telling the passage of time in that strange realm.

 

He didn't get bored.  That was unusual under the circumstances.  He would have thought that going for months doing nothing but trying to stretch would have quickly made him bored.  It wasn't so, and it worried him just a little bit.  He mentally shrugged and continued.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki had one of the fundamentals down, he thought.  He could 'lengthen' his soul a bit, if he thought about the right things.  Bending it and curving it was another matter entirely.

 

Idly, he wondered how long he had been there.  Any sort of attempt at keeping track was lost to him.  Years, more than likely.  A thought occurred to him.

 

 _'How long in the real world, though?'_ he wondered.

 

He woke himself up.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki stared at the ceiling again for the first time in years, somewhat disoriented by having eyes again.  It took him a moment to clear his head and call back what he had come back for.  He mentally checked his timers.  Then the time.  Then external time servers.  Lastly, he checked the EEG results.

 

It was like his first foray into that world that had ended.  At most, he had slept for a second.

 

He fell back to sleep.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki was back at the side of that small pool of water.  He continued to practice stretching himself and trying to figure out how to bend.

 

\----0----

 

If Okazaki forced himself to feel certain emotions, his soul twisted in certain, predictable ways.  He could form letters, anyway.  A single letter, but it was enough to use to communicate.

 

And how long had it taken?  Years?  Decades?  It was impossible to say.  It didn't matter.  He could do it.  He wouldn't forget how this time.

 

Satisfied to some degree, he made his way back to the shack.

 

\----0----

 

"Welcome back," Ushio said.  Okazaki shuddered in her presence slightly, but found the pain of being around her somewhat lessened compared to what it had been.  He could sense that the malice was no less, but his efforts to stretch and strain his very soul had deadened him to the sensations to some degree.

 

It was just as well, really.  He began to stretch and bend.

 

[GREETINGS], he said, one blocky letter at a time.  He forewent punctuation, he couldn't shrink himself enough for a period or a comma.  He could barely form the letters.

 

"It is not what you were capable of before," Ushio said.  "But it will suffice."

 

[GOOD]

 

"Yes.  Good.  Now.  Do you plan to continue to try to take over the world?"

 

[UNCERTAIN]  He paused.  [MAYBE]  Pause.  [FOLLOW MEMORIES FOR NOW]

 

"Then you plan to continue fighting?"

 

[YES]  Pause.  [CANT STOP]  Pause.  [OLD HABITS DIE HARD]

 

"You're going to take on your past self, then?"

 

[YES]

 

"I brought you back to stop yourself, not start another war."  She glared at him.  "You killed my father.  My husband.  And countless others.  And for what?"

 

[TO ATTEMPT WORLD PEACE]  Pause.  [TO RAISE THE STANDARD OF LIVING]

 

"You did neither of those things."

 

[THE ROAD TO HELL IS PAVED WITH GOOD INTENTIONS]

 

Her glare eased up, to be replaced with her apparently normal blank expression.  "And if you keep this up you are truly damned."

 

[I CANT STOP]  Pause.  [THE RISK OF PARADOX NOW FAR GREATER]

 

The corner of her mouth twitched down for a moment in a frown.  "There is no risk of a paradox."

 

Okazaki contemplated that.  After a long moment, he continued.

 

[EXPLAIN]

 

The frown deepened.  "I can't.  Not in terms you would believe."

 

[TRY ME]

 

"What has already happened has happened.  There is nothing stopping you from acting in a manner different from what you remember."

 

[YOU ARE RIGHT]  Pause.  [I DONT BELIEVE THAT]

 

"As I said."  She shook her head with disapproval.

 

[IT IS FAR TOO RISKY TO ATTEMPT TO CHANGE THE PAST LIKE THAT ON THOSE WORDS ALONE]  Pause.  [FOR ALL I KNOW REALITY COULD BREAK DOWN IF I TRIED SUCH A THING]

 

"There is no risk to reality," she ground out, frustrated.  "Reality will get along just fine if you stop yourself."

 

[I CANT TAKE THAT RISK]

 

Her voice returned, almost to her normal emotionless tone, but not quite.  "Did reality destroy itself when you met yourself, when you fought yourself, when you were defeated by yourself?  What made you do those things?"

 

His form shuddered and twisted slightly.  That particular paradox had already caused him some measure of mental grief.  He acted against himself because he remembered that he had acted against himself in his past life.  He would outright attack and defeat himself largely because he remembered that he would be attacked and defeated by his future self.

 

The fun part was trying to figure out what prompted the cycle to start.

 

His form shuddered again.  Something was wrong with that logic.  It hadn't been before, but now...

 

[YOU SAID YOU FOUND A WAY TO LOOP A REALITY UPON ITSELF]  Pause.  [IT MAKES SENSE NOW]

 

"I did not change that.  You did it to yourself."

 

[I CANT TRUST THAT]

 

"Then you are truly damned."

 

[I ALREADY AM]

 

Ushio went silent at that.

 

Okazaki waited.

 

"What if I tell you I have already altered a few events?" she said after a long time, causing his form to shudder once more.

 

[EXPLAIN], he replied after a long moment.

 

"Didn't you ever find it odd?  Small things going your way?  Like, for instance, when you met Fuko.  No one ever looked your way when you went out the window.  Would have complicated matters if they had seen you.  How lucky for you that they didn't."

 

[HOW]

 

"Simple, really.  I’ll admit, there isn’t a lot I can do from here.  But have you ever had an odd thought, a sudden urge, that odd itch that makes you do something you wouldn’t otherwise have done?  It’s as simple as whispering words into the right ear, really. "

 

[WHAT ELSE]

 

"Oh, a number of other things.  The earliest was ensuring that Naoyuki did not kill you.  I also made sure that you decided to visit the Ichinose family.  And I also made sure you used butterfly catching as an excuse.  And for that matter, made sure you stayed just long enough to hear the announcement on the television about the Ichinoses.  Making sure Naoyuki called you in sick afterward.  Or, on a related note, thinking of inviting Kotomi to the theater club.

 

"Or for that matter, thinking of bringing Kotomi to her house.  You would have probably brought her to your own house if I hadn't...  Suggested that.  Which wouldn't have ended optimally."

 

[AND HOW WOULD IT HAVE NOT ENDED OPTIMALLY]

 

"You would have brought her to your house.  An unfamiliar place.  She would have withdrawn on herself.  Ultimately she would have tried to have go to America.  You would have stopped her."  She paused.  "The outcome would not have been optimal."

 

[I SEE]

 

"I don't think that you do.  But it is of no consequence.  You will, in time."

 

[IS THAT ALL], he replied after a long, spiteful moment.

 

"No.  No that is not all.  Haven't you noticed that whenever you are around Kotomi, your emotions seem to run away from you?"

 

For a moment, Okazaki's soul twisted in foul ways not possible under Euclidian geometry, as he absorbed the information and lost control of his thoughts and feelings.  He pushed the thoughts out of his mind to make his reply.

 

[THAT WAS YOU]  He wasn't sure if that to be a statement or a question, barely in control of his feelings at that moment.  All he was sure of was that the news was infuriating.

 

"To a degree.  I can't start an emotion.  But I can amplify one.  Bring it to the forefront.  See that it makes you lock yourself on a course of action.  A spark of attraction.  It would have died on its own.  I breathed on it, made it burn in your soul.  Made you close to her."

 

[KOTOMIS YARD]

 

"Yes, that too.  Your natural tendency toward obsession and compulsion.  Once you had started, I knew you would finish.  You did not disappoint."

 

[WHY]  If he still had a stomach, he knew he would be nauseous.  He would inevitably shatter Kotomi, and why?  Because he had went crazy in another life and driven the woman in front of him to such acts.  As much as he hated her for it, he had to acknowledge that it was no one's fault but his own in the end.

 

"Because you need a conscience.  Someone to keep you from losing it again.  I cannot destroy you, but perhaps I can keep you from destroying the world.  Again."

 

[I SEE]  Understanding was a bitter pill to swallow in an event such as that.  It didn't make him loathe her any less for doing that.  It was playing chance with the entire universe.  It would destroy Kotomi.

 

"But if you insist on continuing this path, I cannot do anything further to help you."

 

Okazaki took a moment to think of how to respond to that.  [YOU THINK YOU ARE HELPING], he said at last, wondering how plainly visible the bitterness was in his now barely formable lettering.

 

"Of course, even if you don't recognize it yourself."

 

He clamped down on his emotions.  [I DO NOT BELIEVE YOU ARE HELPING IN ANY WAY]

 

"I'm aware that you think so."

 

[EVEN IF YOU WERE HELPING I WOULD HAVE TO ASK WHY]

 

Ushio sighed.  "I hate you.  I've told you this before.  But it's not entirely accurate either.  I hate what you have the potential to do.  But I also know that you also have the potential to do great amounts of good in the world.  If you could only get over your desire to fight."

 

[IF THAT COULD GO AWAY IT WOULD HAVE DIED OUT ALREADY]

 

"Perhaps you are right.  Certainly I have tried to suppress that in you.  But it’s such a core aspect of your personality that I can’t affect it at all.  If you will not get over it yourself, then you are truly damned."

 

[YOU HAVE SAID SO ALREADY]

 

"It bears repeating.  Maybe if I say it enough, you'll abandon your foolish path and do something constructive."

 

[PERSONALLY I THINK PREVENTING A PARADOX IS A VERY WORTHY ENDEAVOR]

 

"You're not preventing a paradox, you're damning yourself and dooming the world."  Ushio glared at him.  "You may have seen what happens from one side.  I've seen what will happen from both sides.  Trust me, you will truly be damned if you continue on this path."

 

[IF YOU HAVE SEEN BOTH PATHS THEN WHY DO YOU TRY TO TALK ME OUT OF WHAT YOU KNOW I WILL INEVITABLY CHOOSE]

 

"As I said.  If you stop this foolishness here and now, then maybe, just maybe...  Maybe you will have saved yourself.  Saved the world."

 

[I CANNOT DO THAT]  Pause.  [NOT WITHOUT PROOF THAT I WONT DESTROY THE WORLD IN THE PROCESS]

 

"Then you will be damned."

 

[I KNOW]

 

"You will suffer."

 

[I KNOW THIS TOO]

 

"Your friends will suffer."

 

[NO THANKS TO YOU]

 

"No thanks to you.  It will be completely your own fault.  Heed my words and all will turn out well."

 

[I CANT LET THE UNIVERSE BE DESTROYED]  Pause.  [DAMN YOU]

 

"Kotomi will suffer."

 

Okazaki was silent to that, save for more foul twisting.

 

After a long moment, Ushio continued.  "She will perhaps suffer the worst."

 

[FUCK YOU] Okazaki finally said.  [MAY YOU SPEND THE EONS BURNING]

 

"Do not curse me for telling you the truth.  You already know this is inevitable."

 

[THANKS TO YOU]

 

"Thanks to you.  She would still suffer almost as much on this path regardless.  Almost."

 

[EXPLAIN]

 

"You would have still befriended her without my input.  You would have tried to make her friends with Kyou and Ryou.  And when things finally played out, she would have suffered greatly, thanks to her association with you.

 

"Even if she had never met you in the first place, though, she still would have suffered.  Growing up alone, until a great and terrible darkness befell the earth.  Her suffering would perhaps have been least in that scenario, but in any reality she would suffer."

 

It took Okazaki a few moments to reply as he digested her words.  [THAT IS A CRUEL FATE]  Pause.  [REGARDLESS]  Pause.  [I CANNOT RISK DESTROYING ALL OF CREATION]

 

"Then there is nothing more I can say."

 

Silence reigned.  Okazaki desperately thought, trying to find a reason to believe what she said.  It would be nice.  To not have to see the results.  To maybe, just maybe keep his friends.  Maybe save his old friends.

 

But the risk of seeing an end to all things, not just friendships and lives...  How could he take such a risk?  There was literally no evidence that everything would be fine.  He still wasn't sure this wasn't some sort of strange dream.

 

He couldn't take that risk.  He wouldn't.

 

He let his thoughts stew in silence.  Neither he nor Ushio moved.  That abnormal stillness made him realize suddenly what one of the things that bothered him about her was.  She didn't breathe.  It was sort of funny actually, compared to all the other things that bothered him about her.

 

It reminded him of something...  No, someone else.  _'Who have I seen that was like that before,'_ he thought.  _'Damn it all, I wish I had my hard drive connection.  I-'_

 

Ibuki Fuko.  She didn't appear to breathe either, at least if all you did was look at her.  He never really noticed it except for that first time he had seen her.  That subtle wrongness.  He'd ended up thinking that wrongness was just part of her quasi-spiritual nature.  And all things considered, he felt he was somewhat right about that, too.

 

He had no plans to come back here again.  Anything he said or did there, it would be the last time he would speak to the woman of this world.  _'Might as well ask.'_

 

[I HAVE JUST ONE FINAL QUESTION] Pause.  [WHY DID IBUKI FUKO CLAIM I WAS WRONG]  Pause.  [HOW DID SHE KNOW]

 

"That's two questions," Ushio observed.  "But both have the same answer.  You look wrong to the senses of those whom can see beyond the realm of reality.  Too big, too spread out.  Like you're in more than one place at a time.  Except right now."

 

[EXCEPT RIGHT NOW]  Pause.  [EXPLAIN]

 

"Do you need me to hold your hand?  You are for once as you should be.  In just one form.  You can't see it yourself for obvious reasons, but when you are, as you like to say, distributed, that shows up on your soul.  Don't ask me to describe it to you, I cannot.  No more than I can successfully explain why you should not proceed according to your memories."

 

[THAT AGAIN]  Pause.  [IM LEAVING]  Pause.  [I WILL NOT BE RETURNING]

 

"You'll be back," she declared with a sinister smile.

 

If he had eyes, he would have narrowed them at her.  [AND WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN]

 

"Just what it sounds like.  You will be back.  I have foreseen it."

 

[I SUPPOSE YOU WILL NOW DECLARE THAT YOU ARE MY FATHER]

 

"You do not understand.  But you will."

 

He really wished he had eyes in that realm, because he dearly wished to roll them.  [YOURE DOING THIS ON PURPOSE ARENT YOU]

 

"Of course.  But you will be back.  If you continue on your chosen path."

 

[IMPLYING THAT I DIE]  Pause.  [SO BE IT]  He was at peace with the concept.  Had been for a long time.  That he would apparently return here was irritating, though.

 

"Everyone dies eventually," she said with a shrug.

 

[IF IT PREVENTS A PARADOX THEN I WILL FACE MY DEATH WITH PRIDE]

 

She scowled at him.  "You disgust me."

 

[LIKEWISE]

 

"You will deserve everything that happens to you."

 

[I KNOW]

 

"Then go.  The time for talking has ended."

 

[FUCK YOU]

 

He woke up.

 

\----0----

 

It took Okazaki a few seconds to adjust to having a body again.  He went through the process of checking all the timers and the EEG after he had gathered enough of himself to do so.  Again, no more than a second's worth of sleep.

 

Sleep.  He missed sleep, he realized.  Restful sleep.  Not the parody of sleep he normally subjected himself to, nor the hair raising three seconds of sleep he had just then.  Actual sleep.

 

His other brains began to wake, and he knew he would never experience that feeling ever again, no matter what happened.

 

 _'Well,'_ he thought _.  'Guess I deserve that as well.'_   A grim smile wormed its way onto his face.

 

He rested.

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A Note From The Author:**

 

Thoughts when writing this note:  The flavour of mouthwash after taste and coffee do _not_ go together.  At all.

 

Anyway, on to more relevant things, I’d like to thank LyingOwl-Aria for beta’ing these two chapters, and for moral support.  Stay classy.  :D

 

I’d also like to thank everyone whom has reviewed so far, once more.  In particular, RedheadedMarina, ReadingBlueWolf, and LyingOwl-Aria again, for reviewing this outside of RT.

 

And a very special thanks to Gamara68, the first person in fandom to read through the whole story and review it.  :)  I was beginning to think that wouldn’t happen.  XD

 

Another round of thanks goes to the folks in RT, you’re all wonderful, mostly.  :P  And to those that have read so far without leaving a review, I’d like to thank you for keeping up with this, but I do wish you’d leave an opinion or two.  I won’t bite.  :)  ...  M͏u̸c͡h.  :P


	21. Intersections in Real Time, Part 1

**A** **ʇɹoɥS Note From The Author:**

 

So because February is such a short month, I’ll be releasing the second half a day early, on the 14th.  Just a heads up to anyone following.

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

Okazaki had slept roughly, which for him meant he kept coming back to full alertness when ill thoughts crossed his mind.  He contemplated what Ushio had told him.  He would suffer.  He knew that.  His friends would suffer.  He only suspected that.  Kotomi would suffer.  He suspected that too, but to hear it from someone other than himself was like being stabbed with a red hot fire stoker.

 

And if Ushio could be believed, Kotomi was meant to suffer.  All thanks to him.  Even if he hadn’t met her in the first place, his past self’s actions would see to that.  He wished that it was impossible, but he knew it was all too likely.  As usual, the actions he had taken in the past would ruin yet another life.  The worst thing was he had to let it all happen again.

 

That led him to his next big concern.  In less than a week would be his first face-to-face meeting with his past self.  He remembered how it had gone, and also how he felt when he had recognized the face from that day reflecting back in a mirror, his infantile brain finally having developed enough to keep up with his memories and restore meaning to the images.

 

The first meeting hadn't gone well for his past self; Okazaki had leapt from a window and viciously assaulted himself with all the fury a customized combat cyborg with no need for self-preservation could muster.  It had been brutal, and anticlimactically quick.  He’d put too much emphasis on having a full power combat laser at the time, not enough on melee capabilities.

 

Given the state of his thoughts, it didn't come as much surprise to him that he was already fully alert when he heard the knocking at his door.

 

"Ah, one second," he called before he rose from the bed and dressed.  As he opened the door, an outstretched hand reaching up to knock on the door instead knocked on his face instead.  He blinked.

 

"Ah, Okazaki, I did not mean to hit you," Tomoyo exclaimed with a gasp.

 

He waved it off.  "No harm, no foul.  I assume you are satisfied that I am awake?"

 

"For the moment," she admitted.  "May I come in?"

 

He shrugged and let her come in.

 

"Hmm, it's cleaner than I would have expected a boy's house to be," she said.

 

"Cleanliness is next to godliness," Okazaki observed, "or so it is said."

 

"So it is," Tomoyo admitted.

 

"Can I get you something to eat or drink?" he asked.  "I'm afraid I don't do much cooking but I can make a passable omelet.  Hm, need to start the rice cooker too..."  He scratched his chin thoughtfully.

 

"Omelet?  That isn't how you usually eat, is it?"

 

"In fairness, I can't usually be bothered to make more.  Particularly with all that's been happening as of late."

 

"You really should be eating better, Okazaki.  What's preventing you from doing so?"

 

"...Well, for one I've been helping a friend of mine with some issues," he admitted as a sad smile wormed its way onto his face only to give way to a frown.  "Plus, Naoyuki...  That would be my father...  Passed away a few days ago."

 

"...I'm sorry for your loss," Tomoyo said quietly with a bow.

 

"It's...  It's alright," Okazaki said.  "It's probably for the best.  He was suffering, and now he's not."

 

"Was he ill, then?" she asked sympathetically.

 

"Er, no, not in the traditional sense at least," he admitted.  "He...  Ah, well, he aided the process along, if you understand."

 

"...Ah...  Oh!"  She gasped as she caught onto Okazaki's meaning.  "So he-"

 

"Yeah."

 

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to bring it up," Tomoyo lamented softly.

 

"To be fair, I was the one that brought it up," he noted wryly.  "As I said, it's... probably for the best."

 

"You make it sound like there was nothing you could have done for him," she said with a frown.  "Didn't you take him to a psychiatrist?  You sound like you knew he might do something like that."

 

"It's not as simple as that," Okazaki said.  "I tried to get him to see one, but it just made him angry with me.  I eventually gave up..."  He sighed.  "I made the mistake of getting complacent.  I always knew there was a possibility that he might eventually do it, but as time passed it seemed less and less likely.  I mean, he didn't really get better, but he didn't get worse either.  Things just stayed the same.  But finally..."  He trailed off.

 

It was all a lie, of course.  He only suspected Naoyuki would have gotten mad at him if he had suggested psychiatry.  But he hadn’t.  He had kept his mouth shut, and had even subtly dissuaded him from seeking outside help.  Preserving the maskirovka, preventing a potential paradox had trumped Naoyuki’s mental health, and ultimately his life.

 

That wasn’t to say that he hadn’t tried to do what he could, even if that was very little in the end.  Take care of him, offer him advice...  It only made his death that much more painful.  Effectively, he had killed Naoyuki.  Even if it was for the greater good, he couldn’t absolve himself of his responsibility.

 

"I see," Tomoyo said.

 

"Yeah.  I take solace in the fact that he no longer suffers."

 

"Why was he suffering?  I mean, if you don't mind my asking."

 

"Well...  When I was still a kid, my mother was involved in an automotive accident and died," Okazaki began.  "I know a part of him never really got over that.  It wasn't much after that when he learned something about me that...  Well, let's just say that I know my continued presence had to have been a constant source of anguish for him."

 

"...Um, what did he find out?" Tomoyo asked after a moment.

 

He sighed.  "That... is something I would like to keep a secret.  For...  Well, it's not going to be a secret much longer.  But if you can give me a little more time to keep it, I would appreciate it."

 

"I didn't mean to pry," she said.  "If it's a secret, then you don't have to tell me."

 

"Thank you," he said, bowing his head for a moment with closed eyes.  "So, anyway.  Um...  Not that I'm trying to get rid of you, but if you stay much longer you're probably going to have to run to school."

 

"Huh?" Tomoyo glanced down at her watch.  "Oh, you're right.  Before I leave, Okazaki."

 

"Yes?"

 

"You're not going to go back to bed are you?"

 

"Hm, I suppose I won't," he said.  "I wasn't sleeping particularly well anyway."

 

"It bothers you that much?" she asked with concern.

 

"Ah, not to sound callous, but no, that's not it," Okazaki said.  "It's...  Well, many things honestly.  I hate to be so secretive, but I really don't wish to share, just yet."

 

"Is it related to the other secret?" Tomoyo asked, concern replaced with curiosity.

 

"Well...  Yes, actually," he admitted.  "In part certainly."

 

"Then I will not pry."

 

"Oh, so you would have pried if it wasn't related to the other secret?" Okazaki quipped.

 

"That's not what I said at all," she complained as Okazaki grinned.

 

"I know, I know," he said.  "I'm just pulling your chain."

 

She shook her head.  "You're sometimes frustrating to talk to."

 

"My apologies," he said.  "Now then...  You must be up for a short jog this morning."

 

"You say you're not trying to get rid of me, but now I'm not so sure," Tomoyo said with slight irritation.

 

"Hey, if you want to stay a while that's fine," he said.  "You'd probably find it a bit boring though, unless you like science fiction.  Been thinking of maybe rewatching Babylon 5."

 

"I don't find it particularly interesting."

 

Okazaki shrugged.  "Oh well, can't be helped then."

 

"I will be over here tomorrow to ensure you're eating a proper breakfast," Tomoyo said.

 

"But I don't really feel like making a proper breakfast," he observed wryly.  "That's why I haven't made a proper breakfast."

 

"Then I will just have to make you one," she said.

 

He frowned.  "Don't go out of your way on my account.  Please."

 

"I've made up my mind on this," she said firmly.  "I will see to it that you are eating properly."

 

"...I'm not going to be able to talk you out of this am I?" Okazaki observed wearily.

 

"Not in the least," Tomoyo stated.

 

"...I suppose setting and keeping goals is an admirable trait," he said with a sigh.

 

"You seem to really be against the idea of eating my food," she stated with her hands on her hips.

 

"I'm sure your food is fine.  However, I really do not wish to impose upon you in that manner."

 

"It's no problem at all," Tomoyo said.  "Now, you're right, I do have to go now.  See you later."

 

"Later," Okazaki said as she left his house.

 

\----0----

 

"Five hundred Centauri Dukats," spoke ambassador Mollari as someone knocked on Okazaki's door.  "That should buy you wh-"

 

Okazaki paused the show he was watching to answer it.  "One second," he said as the knocking became more insistent.  He opened the door to find Kyou standing outside, an alternatively amused and irritated expression adorning her face.  Judging by the time, and the fact that she was in her school uniform, he guessed that she'd come to his house shortly after the theater club had closed for the day.

 

"So I hear you got caught fighting Yamaguchiya again," she said.

 

"Well informed as always," he noted as he stepped aside to let her in.  "Well, step in, take a load off."

 

She walked in, leaving her shoes behind before sitting down in the seat Okazaki had moved in front of the television.

 

"Hey now," he began with amusement.

 

"Watching this again?" Kyou asked, unimpressed.

 

"You say that as if it's a bad thing," he pointed out as he sat down near the chair.  "So what am I missing, then?"

 

"Well, let's see," she began counting off on her fingers.  "Kotomi wasn't happy to learn that you wouldn't be there for the next three days, the choir club agreed to join the theater club, oh, and I think you partially undid my work on convincing Nagisa that you're not a psychopath."  She glared at Okazaki, who scratched the back of his head sheepishly.

 

"In fairness, it's not like Yamaguchiya and I fighting is a new thing," he noted with a smirk.  "I mean, it was inevitable, really."

 

"Yeah, yeah, well now I gotta find some way of convincing her that you're not truly a psychopath," she lamented.

 

"Would it help if I put panties on my head and danced with a mannequin again?" he asked, and snatched the remote control out of the air after Kyou threw it at him.

 

"I still can't believe you got me banned from that store," she seethed.  "Why am I helping you again?"

 

"Because you find me good target practice?" Okazaki suggested.  She glowered at him and he raised his hands in surrender.  "Sorry, sorry...  I didn't mean to make things hard on you, and I'm grateful to you for trying to patch things over."

 

"You better be."

 

"I am."

 

"Good."

 

Okazaki shook his head at her with amusement.  "So they decided to join then?"

 

"They decided they didn't have much choice as we had Koumura first," Kyou said.  "Nagisa and Nishina were trying to figure out the details of what they're going to do exactly when they left."

 

"That going to be a problem for you?" he asked.  "I couldn't help but notice that you and Fumie were halfway to exchanging blows last time I was there."

 

"You mean Sugisaka?" she asked.

 

"Oh, so you're on a last name basis?" he asked with amusement.  "Harsh."

 

"Unlike you, I have some sense of decorum.  And where's my tea?"

 

"A sense of decorum?  You?" Okazaki replied as he stood up to make some tea.

 

"Yes, me," Kyou said as he retrieved an old-fashioned tea kettle from a cupboard.

 

"Don't you call me Tomoya all the time?" he noted as he filled the kettle with tap water.

 

"That's different," she said.  "We're friends."

 

"Which is unlikely in you and Sugisaka's case?" he replied as he set the kettle on the stove to begin boiling.

 

"She gets on my nerves," she said.  "Going into a place saying what we can and can't do.  It's rude!"

 

"Mmm," Okazaki grunted as he retrieved a couple of tea cups and tea.  "Sure you're not, oh, recognizing just a small measure of familiarity there?"

 

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Kyou deadpanned.

 

"Of course not," he replied with an equal measure of aridity as he prepared the cups to accept hot water.  "Tea will be ready in a minute."

 

"Thanks," she said.  "So what is this that you're watching, anyway?"

 

"Oh, it's-"

 

Someone knocked on the door.

 

"One second," he said as he moved to get the door.  He opened it to a familiar face.  "Oh, Kotomi chan, what brings you here?"

 

"...I wanted to see Tomoya kun," Kotomi said.

 

Okazaki smiled slightly.  "Well, come on in then," he said.  A moment later he blinked as a thought occurred to him while she shed her shoes.  "Oh...  I don't recall telling you my address, come to think of it."

 

"I told her," Kyou said from the living room.

 

"...She did," Kotomi affirmed.

 

He blinked and sighed.  He was all but certain that was some sort of transparent way of setting the two of them up.  Which meant she was continuing to cheerfully ignore his entreaties not to do so.  _'Frustrating,'_ he thought to himself.  _'Maybe I should just tell her everything just to get her to stop.  ...Yeah, and I think I'll just go ahead and rip my beating heart out of my chest and stomp on it early too, while I'm at it.'_

 

"...Moving right along," he stated, the sound of a whistle blowing telling him that the water was ready.

 

"Anyway, I'd take you up on the tea, but I think I'd better be going," Kyou observed as she stood up.

 

Okazaki regarded Kyou warily as Kotomi looked around his house thoughtfully.

 

"Kyou, a quick word," he said as he beckoned her over.

 

She approached with an amused smile.  "Sure, here's a quick word.  Have fun."

 

"Did you plan this?" he asked her quietly.

 

"Not exactly, but it seems to be working out in my favor," she observed.

 

"...You realize you will regret this, right?  I'm not making a threat or anything like this, it's just..."  He trailed off and shook his head.  "...Never mind."

 

"Ugh, Tomoya, live a little, alright?" Kyou replied.  "I'm tired of seeing you always moping."

 

"You do not understand," Okazaki warned.  "But you will."

 

"Yeah, yeah," she waved him off.  "You and melodrama."

 

He sighed.  "...I'll see you later then."

 

"Later," she replied cheerfully.

 

"...Kyou chan, goodbye," Kotomi said.

 

"Bye bye Kotomi," Kyou replied as she left his house.

 

\----0----

 

"...What are you watching?" Kotomi asked as Okazaki poured the hot water into the cups.

 

"Oh, it's an old science fiction television show," he replied.

 

"...Science fiction television show?" she repeated.

 

"Yeah," he replied.  "Babylon 5.  Hm, you might like it, actually.  It's not centered around time travel, but it does have a little bit of it, and some romance as well.  And rather cerebral plotlines, and a few battles besides."  He grinned.

 

"...Oh," she said contemplatively.  "...Can I watch it?"

 

"Of course," Okazaki replied as he brought out the tea.  "Ah, well, assuming you can understand spoken English."

 

"...I do," she replied cheerfully, appropriately enough in English.

 

"Hail, and well met," he replied in English with a smile as he handed her a tea cup.

 

"...Thank you," she replied before taking a sip of the tea.

 

"Hold on a second, and I'll grab the sofa," he said as he set his own cup on the coffee table he'd placed in front of the television as a footrest.

 

\----0----

 

The credits began rolling on the fourth episode.  Okazaki turned thoughtfully to Kotomi, whom sat beside him on the sofa.  Though he had sat down gently on the article of furniture, he still ended up sinking into it too much for his liking.  That it prompted Kotomi to lean against him alternatively brought disheartening feelings as well as pleasant sensations in the pit of where his stomach should have been.

 

He was slowly growing used to the feelings, though they continued to be a source of great consternation for him.  He wondered idly if Ushio's foul influence was at play even now, before mentally shrugging.  There was nothing he could do about that if so.

 

However, he started to become a bit concerned for other reasons.  "Kotomi chan," he began as he paused the video, "isn't it getting late?"

 

"...Oh?" she replied as he regarded her.

 

"Well, if you need to get a good night's sleep for class tomorrow."

 

"...Can't I stay?" she asked after some thought.

 

"I think the rumor mill would have too much of a field day with it," he said wryly. 

 

"...Oh?"  Kotomi pondered the meaning of that for a moment before a blush took hold of her face.  "...Ah!"  She hugged herself.

 

"Don't worry, I've almost finished the elevator," Okazaki said.  "Which reminds me.  Where should it come out at?"

 

"...Ah," she contemplated his question for a few moments.  "...How big is the elevator?"

 

"Well, I could fit the terminus in a closet.  It's not big, maybe a meter by a meter, and that's with the motivators as well."

 

"...The first floor closet would work," Kotomi noted.

 

"Where is that?" he asked, then paused.  "Hold on a second, let me get something."  He stood up gently, doing his best to avoid jostling Kotomi as he stood.  He went to his room and opened the desk, pulling out his mostly unused cell phone before returning to Kotomi and setting it on the table.

 

The phone lit up on its own, being linked in with his mental net like most of the other electronic devices in the house.  The built in projector, standard on that model of phoe since 2033, displayed a floor plan of Kotomi's house on the table top.  He moved over a piece of paper for the sake of contrast, the projector not showing up well on the wood grain table.

 

"I made this shortly after you said I could make the elevator," Okazaki said.  "I hope you don't mind.  I pulsed the house with sonar and ground penetrating radar to build the model."

 

"...I don't mind," Kotomi replied with a smile, which he returned.

 

"Good," he said gently.  "Now, this first floor closet, I'm guessing it's this one here?"  He pointed at the diagram on the table.

 

She studied it for a moment before replying.  "...Yes, that's the one."

 

Okazaki flipped the diagram, taking a look at what lay under the closet.  "Hmm," he said, rubbing his chin.  "I could do that I suppose, but I'll have to reroute these pipes...  Ah, that's a sewer pipe.  That'll stink."

 

"...Would somewhere else be better?" Kotomi asked quietly.

 

"No, that's fine," he said.  "Hardly the worst thing I had to muck about with.  Almost flooded my house with sewage when I first dug down to that point.  That wasn't fun."

 

Kotomi considered that with a frown.  "...That sounds unpleasant."

 

"It was," he said with a hint of amusement.  "Was able to seal everything up though and reroute the pipes before there was much investigation though."  And it had cost him a bit of time to do so, time that he hadn't thought he really had, but it had worked out in the end.

 

"...That's good," she said with a smile.

 

"Indeed!" he said glibly.  "Anyway, you might want to go home and take anything that's just sitting on the floor of the closet and put it somewhere suspended, unless you don't mind it accompanying the elevator on the downward trip."

 

Kotomi nodded.

 

She left shortly afterward, and he sat down in front of the television and stared at the screen for a few minutes.  It was wrong, he knew.  A relationship that should not exist.  And now that he had almost finished building his elevator, she would be all that much closer.

 

"Why did I ask if I could make that elevator?" he asked himself with a sigh. _'So you could be sure of her safety,'_ was the mental response.  _'Or was it Ushio playing with our head again?'  He_ sighed again and rested his head in his hands.  He spent the night not moving from that spot, not even bothering to fall into his half-sleep.


	22. Intersections in Real Time, Part 2

Okazaki still sat in the same place with head in hands when, come morning, there was knocking on his door.

 

"One second," he called out wearily as he stood and walked over to the door.  He wasn't surprised when he saw who was on the other side.  "Tomoyo," he said in greeting.

 

"...Tomoya," she replied after a moment's pause to consider his calling her by first name.  She looked at him with a raised eyebrow.  "Are you unwell?"

 

"I didn't sleep last night," he admitted.

 

"You didn't?" Tomoyo asked, confused.

 

"Not a wink," he said as he motioned her in.

 

"You look pretty good for not having slept then," she said as she entered the house and slipped off her shoes.

 

"It doesn't affect me in the same way as most."

 

"I'll say," Tomoyo said.  "I thought maybe you were a little tired, you just look a little hunched over."

 

Okazaki straightened his posture out of instinct.

 

"And now you look just fine," she said with a skeptically furrowed brow.  "Are you sure you didn't get any sleep?"

 

"Positive," he replied.

 

Her skeptical expression remained unchanged.

 

"Look, it's related to secrets, alright?"

 

Tomoyo's skepticism only seemed to deepen at that.  "You're beginning to make me want to start prying," she said.  "That doesn't add up."

 

"It does add up, just..." Okazaki paused for a moment.  "...Not in any way you're likely thinking."  He sighed.  _'You're going to have to tell them, and soon,'_ he thought warily.  _'Kotomi already knows.  Kyou, you know she suspects.  Everyone else is going to find out after you kill your past self’s drone.  We can't keep hiding this.'_

 

"...I will respect your privacy then," she said.  "But you make it very difficult to do so."

 

"You'll find out soon," he said tiredly, feeling like every ounce of energy was being drained from him.  "Very soon.  I'll probably tell you, Sunohara, and most of the theater club sometime in the next few days."  He pondered the ground for a moment, as if it held the secret of everything.  "Maybe sooner."

 

Tomoyo raised a concerned hand toward Okazaki for a moment before she let it drop and joined him in contemplating the carpeting.  "...I can't pretend I understand what's going on with you," she admitted after a few moments, "but we're your friends, and we're here for you."

 

He smiled at the floor, a bitter, sad smile.  "Perhaps," he said simply.  "For the moment."

 

Her eye twitched in irritation.

 

Okazaki continued before she could say anything.  "What I have to say may... no, almost certainly, will make you regret being friends with me.  It's a secret so vast, so profound, so... horrifying, even I have trouble believing it some days, were it not for incontrovertible proof that it is true.  It's..."  He swallowed.  "I'm sorry.  I just...  I'm so tired."  He leaned against the wall and closed his eyes.

 

"...How about I make you breakfast," Tomoyo said after a few moments of silence.  "Maybe eating something will help you feel better."

 

He smiled again and nodded.

 

\----0----

 

The sensation of an old, bitter soul being squeezed in a vice spanned Okazaki's entire mind, from the fragment of his being that was waiting for breakfast from Tomoyo, to every fragment in every bunker awaiting their duties, to the fragment of his consciousness riding the elevator up to Kotomi's house.

 

Though he had regained some composure by that point, he still felt the heavy burden of the truth pressing on him like a million anvils on a million chests.  After they understood, after they had heard the exact depths he had gone to....  After they had seen, with their own eyes, just what he had done....  He would have no friends left, period.

 

In their own way, they would abandon him.  The thought of Kotomi doing so hurt him most of all, even as he halfway welcomed it.  He wasn't sure anymore if it was for her sake or for the sake of spiting Ushio.  The thought brought him a measure of shame in its selfishness.

 

He took a couple of deep breaths and knocked on the inside of the closet door.  "Kotomi chan?  It's me."

 

There was silence for a few moments before he heard footsteps, their staccato rhythm tracing a path toward the closet.  The door swung open softly, and he gazed down slightly at Kotomi's lithe form.  His mental state as it was, he couldn't help but reach forward and take her into a gentle hug.  She blinked and returned the hug before he let her go.

 

Kotomi regarded him with a light blush and confused eyes.  "...Tomoya kun.  Is something wrong?"

 

Okazaki sighed.  "Just...  Thinking about the others, and how they will react.  And...  You, honestly.  You've not seen directly what all I have done, and..."  He shook his head.  "Never mind.  I'm sorry."

 

She was silent for a few moments, contemplating what he had told her.  "...Was it because you wanted to help people?" she asked quietly.

 

He nodded.  "I wanted everyone to have a good life.  To be able to do what they wanted to do.  To have a chance to be happy, to not be oppressed, to be...."  He paused.  "To be able to live life to the fullest.  What we have now, it crushes so many, grinds them in the gears, shatters dreams and destroys health, and all for what?  Nothing.  Some temporal happiness for a select few."

 

He snorted.  "And it will be temporal, because at the rate things are going, we're going to turn the planet into another Venus.  I couldn't let that happen.  But I....  My methods...."  He shook his head in dejection.  She wrapped her arms around him and leaned into his chest, and he gently wrapped his arms around her in return.

 

"...You did what you thought was right," Kotomi said at last into his chest.  "You wanted to bring beauty into everyone's lives...  Wanted to keep the earth beautiful..."

 

Okazaki sighed.  "And how I went about it..."  He shook his head.  "Even then, I knew there were better ways, but... but all I knew, all I had done before..."  He shook his head again and pushed her away gently.  "I'm not the kind person you think I am, Kotomi chan.  I..."  He ground his teeth as she looked at him with alternatively hurt and concerned eyes.

 

 _'I can't put this off any longer,'_ he thought with a sigh.  "Kotomi chan...  After classes today.  Can you ask Fujibayashi, Furukawa and Kyou to come here?  There's... no point putting it off any longer."  She nodded after a few moments contemplation, and he offered her a small, sad smile.  "Thank you, Kotomi chan."

 

"...You're welcome," she said gently.

 

He nodded.  "I'll also be bringing over a couple of people you haven't met... if that's alright with you, that is."

 

"...It's alright," she replied with a small smile, which Okazaki returned.

 

"Thank you, Kotomi," he said.  "Very much."

 

Kotomi merely smiled brightly at him.

 

\----0----

 

Tomoyo and Okazaki ate together silently.

 

Okazaki had to admit that Tomoyo was a good cook.  He preferred Kotomi's cooking, but he knew that there was at least some degree of favoritism there. _'Is that me or Ushio talking there?  Gods damn it, how am I supposed to tell, now?'_ He shook his head mentally.  It did him no good to speculate; he would just have to keep going as he had before.  It just made Kotomi and his relationship all the more bitter to him.

 

"After classes today," Okazaki began after he swallowed the last bit of his meal, "there's going to be... something of a meeting at one of my friends' house.  I will be telling everyone there my little secret."

 

"Oh?" Tomoyo raised an eyebrow at his words.  "Are you sure you want to do that?"

 

"No," he stated with a frown.  "But I need to."

 

"I see."

 

"I would like you to attend as well.  It's only fair; we've fought side by side now."

 

A small amused smile crossed Tomoyo's face at his statement.  "Since you put it like that, it would be remiss of me not to attend."

 

"Thank you," he replied.  "The address is..."

 

\----0----

 

"Do you want to take a look at my bunker now, Kotomi chan?" Okazaki asked after a few moments.  "I know you wanted to.  We still have plenty of time before classes start."

 

"...I would like that," Kotomi admitted.

 

"Alright then," he said as he stepped back into the closet elevator.  "Just step into the magic box, and we'll be there before you can say abracadabra."

 

"...Abracadabra," she intoned after she stepped into the elevator with him.

 

He couldn't help but smile in amusement.  "I wasn't being literal, Kotomi chan."

 

"...Oh," she said as the door closed behind them.

 

"I would think that the g-forces would be a problem," he noted.

 

Kotomi considered the explanation.  "...That could be a problem," she admitted to Okazaki's further amusement.

 

The elevator descended.

 

\----0----

 

"I'd better go," Tomoyo admitted a few minutes later, after she had cleared away and washed the dishes.

 

"Before you go, can you do me a favor?" Okazaki asked.

 

"What do you need?"

 

"...Well, as you know, being suspended means that I'm effectively under house arrest."

 

"...And you're holding a meeting at your friend's house?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

 

"...Yes, and..."  He paused.

 

"Let me guess, it’s part of your secret," she finished for him.

 

"Very good, we'll make you a precognitive yet," he replied with a smirk.

 

"You're frequently frustrating to talk to," Tomoyo observed.

 

"Guilty as charged," Okazaki admitted cheerfully.  "Anyway, yes.  So I can't...  Well..."  He frowned.  "Look, can you just tell Sunohara to meet us at that address?"  At Tomoyo's slightly irritated expression, he continued.  "I know you don't want to have anything to do with him, but...  He deserves to know, too."  He paused and spoke in a somewhat aggrieved voice.  "Even if I don't exactly relish him meeting Kotomi..."

 

She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose.  "I can't believe I'm agreeing to this, but I will do as you ask."

 

"Thank you, Tomoyo.  If he's not at school, and he very well may not be, he can be found in the school dorms.  His room number is..."

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki showed Kotomi around his bunker.  The scale of the bunker quickly became apparent as they passed row after row after row of obviously mechanical forms.  They came in a plethora of shapes and sizes, and they filled the bunker almost to capacity with the only spaces where it was easy to move being corridors between standing machines.

 

The machines themselves bore a striking resemblance to the robots from the Terminator franchise.  This wasn't by accident.  First and foremost, that's how he remembered they were.  Secondly, they were less distinguishable than his past self's units.  There was a certain anonymity in borrowing concepts from old movies, that he knew would help to mask his true nature from both his past self, and from the world at large.

 

The nearly skeletal forms were also surprisingly nimble, which was a large reason why he had been able to defeat his past self.  Simply, he couldn't track them fast enough with laser turrets, and anti-personnel sonic cannons just made them stumble a little.  Oddly, they were less effective when conventional weapons were used, but his past self didn't use conventional weapons, preferring not to have the extensive logistics train that required.

 

He watched as she eyed one machine after another, her interest in the other fragments of himself bringing him a measure of much needed amusement.  Occasionally he'd wave at her with one of his mechanical forms, and smiled as her face lit up almost as like a child in a toy store.

 

He winced sympathetically however each time a loud clang from the manufacturing plant below startled her.  He also frowned at the beads of sweat that began popping up on her face, and summoned a metal plate to be brought to him.

 

It reached them after a few minutes of being passed hand to hand to himself by the mechanical pincers of his other forms.  He used it to fan Kotomi, to her grateful smile.  She still sweat though, the heat of the bunker making even his fanning seem as like having a space heater blow on oneself as opposed to a fan.

 

They continued walking.  From that perspective, the bunker seemed endless.  It was easy enough for him to sense the scope of the base, how it was almost as wide as the city itself, but he suspected from Kotomi's increasingly uneasy expression that it must seem considerably vaster than that.  He sighed.

 

"Kotomi chan," he said at last, letting the improvised fan lean up against his shoulder, "do you want to watch a bit more Babylon 5 before it's time for classes?  We can squeeze in another episode and have time enough to get you back to your house before you have to leave for school."

 

"...Um," Kotomi began, giving every appearance that her unease was getting the better of her before she simply nodded.

 

"Alright then," Okazaki said.  "I've actually been walking us in that direction...  It's not much further."

 

\----0----

 

Tomoyo left, leaving Okazaki on his own.  He sat down and waited.  It was almost exactly five minutes later when, in his room, a section of floor moved out of the way to give room for the two figures that rose from it.  Okazaki and Kotomi had made it to Okazaki's house.  The fragment of Okazaki in the house waved at Kotomi, who blinked and looked alternatively from one Okazaki to the next.

 

"As I said..." the Okazaki that accompanied Kotomi said.

 

"A mind linked army," continued the Okazaki that had been in the house.  They both grinned in amusement at Kotomi's bewildered blinking.

 

"To make this somewhat less confusing," the form that had accompanied Kotomi began, "this form will return to your house, if that's alright with you."

 

"...Ah..." Kotomi blinked and focused on the form that had been with her before she nodded her assent.

 

"Alright, you may want to stand over there then," the form noted as it pointed toward the doorway.  Kotomi moved after a few seconds, and the form that was Okazaki descended with the elevator.  The remaining Okazaki smiled at the still confused Kotomi.

 

"Who says you can't be in more than one place at a time?" he said with a smirk.

 

Kotomi walked gingerly over to him and collapsed onto the seat.  "...But...  How?" she asked finally.

 

"Shall I begin describing the basics of that technology?" Okazaki asked.  "Rather than watching Babylon 5?"

 

Kotomi nodded vigorously, to his amusement.

 

"Alright then," he said, and began describing the mind to machine interface's basic principles to Kotomi.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki spent the better part of an hour going over the basic principles of the mind to machine interface.  As he expected, Kotomi picked up the concepts quickly, quicker than it had taken him when he had first started out using them.  Watching her mind work as they talked brought a return of unwelcome sensations that were uncomfortably close to lust.  He ignored them, and soon it was time for her to leave.

 

"I have arranged for a vehicle of a sort to get you back to your house through the bunker," he observed.  "It'll be quicker that way, and you won't have to deal with the heat as much."

 

"...I won't?" she asked.

 

"Nope.  I would have used one in the first place, but I figured you might better appreciate actually seeing the bunker," Okazaki replied with a small smile.

 

Kotomi nodded and, before he could do anything about it, wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her lips against his gently.  It was a first kiss for both of them.  She pulled back after a moment and blinked.

 

"...Ah..." she said as she let him go.  A bright blush lit up on her face as she brought her hand up to her lips.

 

"Er..."  He found himself at a loss for words as he regarded Kotomi with a raised eyebrow.  He scratched the back of his head after a few moments and closed his eyes pensively.  "...The elevator's waiting," he said at last, as he pointed toward his bedroom.  Kotomi stepped backward and, after a moment's hesitation, ran into his bedroom to the elevator.  He watched her descend before he smashed his fist into the wall behind him.

 

The wall didn't offer much resistance.  However, he offered the house's electrical system a considerable amount of it as he unintentionally broke through some wiring in the wall and closed the circuit with his fist.  He frowned and pulled back his hand, a strip of skin already beginning to redden where the electricity had taken the path of least resistance.

 

"Well that was stupid," he said to the empty house.

 

\----0----

 

The ride back to the elevator to Kotomi's house was silent.  As she had exited the elevator from his house, she had, without a word, got into the vehicle Okazaki had waiting for her.  It was a form of its own, usually used to transport stuff to his desk.  As always, there were other uses for his creations though.

 

It ferried her to the elevator to her house.  When it had made it there, she got out and ascended, not a word spoken between her and his car form.  Her face had been blank, not a trace of emotion except for a lingering blush on her face.

 

He mentally sighed.  In spite of all the knowledge he had eaten from unwilling minds, he still wasn't sure what to do in a situation like what had just happened with Kotomi.  He knew he couldn't leave it as he had, that it had been stupid to send her away without word, but for a moment he had been caught completely off guard.  He wasn't used to that, and had done the very first thing to come to mind.

 

He would have to figure out how to set that right.  If it could be set right, particularly after he told her the extent of his crimes.

 

\----0----

 

The fragment of Okazaki that dwelled in his house spent the intervening hours fixing the broken wiring and patching the wall.  Below the city, a couple of fragments identical to it met at the elevator to Kotomi's house.  They waited until the end of classes for the day, then another half hour, before stepping onto the elevator platform.

 

They rode the small elevator back to back.  As they ascended, they started to hear voices.

 

"When's he going to show up?" spoke Kyou.

 

"...He said he would meet us after classes," Kotomi said.

 

"He also claimed he was under house arrest," Tomoyo said.

 

"Relax, if he says he'll be here, he'll be here," Sunohara said.

 

"That is a point, I've never seen him go against his word," Kyou admitted.

 

"He had me pick him up instead of himself," Tomoyo said.  "Because he's under house arrest."

 

They arrived at Kotomi's closet.

 

"I'm sure he had good reason for that," Kyou admitted uncertainly.

 

"I did," Okazaki said as he stepped out of the elevator, followed by Okazaki.

 

Kyou blinked.  Then blinked again.  Then sat down heavily on the couch behind her.

 

Sunohara leaned forward, the toothpick in his mouth falling out as he gaped at the two identical figures.

 

Tomoyo stumbled backward before regaining her composure and regarding the two Okazakis with widened eyes.

 

Furukawa looked once at the two and fainted, thankfully already seated and thus saved from possible injury.

 

Fujibayashi blinked a couple times before opening and shutting her mouth a couple times in confusion.

 

Kotomi merely blinked at the two Okazakis before looking down at her hands, a slight blush on her face.

 

"Tomoya, what the hell?" Kyou was the first one to recover her ability to speak.  "What the actual hell?"

 

"O-Okazaki kun, what...?" Tomoyo stuttered uncharacteristically.

 

"Uh...  Okazaki...  You have a twin brother?"  Sunohara asked.

 

"No," the Okazaki replied as one.

 

Sunohara blinked again and scratched his head, speechless once more.

 

"He wasn't joking, I knew he wasn't joking, thought he was joking," Kyou said softly as she brought her hands up to her forehead, wide-eyed.

 

"Kyou's right," the two Okazakis said.

 

"U-Um...  About the m-mind linked army?" Fujibayashi said finally.

 

"Exactly..." said one of the Okazakis as it took the nearest seat and sat down.  It looked over at Furukawa, concerned.  "Ah, Furukawa's not looking so good.  Kotomi chan..."  He glanced over at Kotomi, whom looked over with a blush, but looked back down at her hands, unable to hold his gaze.  He sighed deeply.

 

Kyou regained enough of her faculties to look between Kotomi and the seated Okazaki before blinking.  To Okazaki's relief, she kept silent.

 

"Ah...  Do you have any smelling salts around or anything like that?" he asked Kotomi at last.

 

"...Um, yes, give me a minute," Kotomi said as she stood up and left the room.

 

Kyou watched her go before turning first to the seated Okazaki, then the standing Okazaki, before deciding on talking to the seated Okazaki.  "Um, what happened?"

 

"It's... nothing," he said.

 

Sunohara looked at Kyou, then the seated Okazaki.  "Um, Okazaki," he said quietly, "that doesn't sound like nothing.  And..."  He screeched.  "WHY ARE THERE TWO OKAZAKIS?!?"

 

Kyou reached over and punched Sunohara in the side of the head, even as she rocked back and forth on the sofa slightly.

 

"Ow," Sunohara said.

 

Kotomi returned with a small bottle, which she handed to the standing Okazaki, not meeting his eyes.

 

He took them silently and walked over to Furukawa, before opening the bottle and bringing it under her nose.  She roused quickly.

 

"Um...  Okazaki?" Furukawa said as she looked up at him.  "For a moment I thought there were..."  She paused as she looked over at the seated Okazaki.  "...Two..."  She looked back at the Okazaki with the smelling salts.  "...Um...  ...Um..."

 

Both Okazakis sighed.

 

"There's a rational explanation for this, Furukawa," the standing Okazaki said before walking back to the sitting Okazaki, who raised his hand up.  The standing Okazaki deposited the bottle of smelling salts on his hand before walking toward the elevator closet.

 

"Maybe I should just start explaining," Okazaki said.

 

"Please," Tomoyo said.

 

Okazaki grinned bitterly.  "Very well.  If you insist."  He sighed deeply.  "Yes.  Very well."  _'...Stop stalling.  Just tell them.  That much will be over soon.'_   He began talking.

 

He had already decided to tell them almost everything.  He started by explaining that he had been reborn into Okazaki's body.  That the person who was supposed to have been born there hadn't been.  He left out Ushio; he didn't know what to make of that situation, and thinking about it depressed him.

 

He told them next about his past life, before he had been augmented, giving them a brief summary of it.  Then he began to tell them about how he had first come to be, as he preferred to call it, 'distributed.'  It had started with the death of his mother...

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A Note From The Author:**

 

I’d just like to thank LyingOwl for her continued work beta’ing this thing.  Don’t think that I’m not appreciative.  :)

 

I’d also like to thank everyone that’s gotten this far.  :P  And specifically IrishPanther, Gamara68, LyingOwl (again), SierraOscar154, ReadingBlueWolf, and RedHeadedMarina for reviewing.  You guys are awesome.

 

Now, as to the chapter, I actually didn’t realize until fairly recently the timing of this.  I’m posting this up on valentines, and in the chapter, they kiss.  Sorta.  Either way, did not plan that.  But hey, serendipity, right?  That, or my subconscious is playing mindgames with me again, not the first time that’s happened.

 

Either way, hope you’re enjoying it!  And I hope you enjoy the next couple chapters...  Those’re gonna be interesting, I tell ya.


	23. And I Am Legion, Part 1

_February 12, 2031:  Okazaki's past self._

_He sat woodenly in the recliner.  Every bit of him seemed to ache.  It had been like that for a while, the result of many fights and his own weight crippling his body.  It was only made worse though, by what had happened last month._

_Mum was dead._

_It had come out of nowhere, just...  One day she was alive, the next...  Spread out all over what was left of her car on her way to the store.  There wasn't enough of her left to identify, outside of DNA records, but he'd seen the pictures, after demanding them.  It hadn't been pretty; it wasn't enough to make him vomit, but it had been close._

_He took some measure of solace that the drunk that plastered her car also died, but it was cold comfort.  Still saved him the effort of finding and killing him._

_The funeral had been three weeks ago.  Closed casket.  Had to be._

_He'd declined giving the eulogy.  There was nothing he felt like saying.  Nothing he could say.  He sat through the service without a word, even through the well wishes of his extended family.  Meaningless.  He had driven back afterward, ignoring the funeral dinner._

_They'd buried her a couple days later.  He'd helped carry the coffin without word, helped them lower her remains into the ground.  Then he left, not staying for the rest of the service.  Later, after he had gotten home, he got calls from the extended family, wondering if he was alright.  He'd answered, with various degrees of "leave me alone" or "fuck you," depending on who it was.  The calls eventually stopped._

_His few remaining friends online that he hadn’t managed to alienate or be alienated by had noticed his mood as well.  He hadn't said anything to them when asked what was up.  He didn't want to talk about it.  Put it in the bottle with everything else, increase the pressure until it exploded.  Old habits die hard.  He wondered where it would explode next.  Probably on himself.  He didn't care._

_He played idly with the remote to the television.  He'd gotten the TV for mum a couple years back.  Wasn't nice, but it was affordable.  In a fit of emotion, he tossed the remote at the TV, and stared numbly at the jagged hole it left in the thin screen._

_Didn't matter.  Nothing mattered.  All things must end.  He considered the bottle on the table.  Sleeping pills.  He'd gotten them on his way back yesterday._   'Could down the bottle.  Have enough time to get the gas from the shed and burn everything.  Leave nothing for the sharks.  Fuck 'em all, ought to do it.'  _He sighed and leaned back._

 

 _He hadn't cried.  He was surprised.  Even now it seemed like he was still in shock.  Or maybe he had just bottled up his emotions so well that, when his mother passed on, arguably the person closest to him at that point, he just didn't care.  He glanced over at the ruined screen._ 'Just shock, then.  Maybe there is a spark of humanity left in this decaying husk of a body.'  _He snorted._   'So hard to tell these days.'

_He was interrupted by the sound of the mail slot opening and shutting.  It was something of a surprise the mail still ran at all these days; they'd been hurting financially for years, and the only reason they were still open at all was because the government hadn't seen fit to close them down completely.  Still, they only ran mail once a week these days._

_He didn't get up for a few seconds, his body and mind both protesting the thought of action.  He growled at both and stood, wincing as his knees and back both protested the movement.  That didn't matter either.  He opened the door and retrieved the mail._

_Junk mail.  Junk mail.  More junk mail.  Most of it addressed to mum.  He sighed at that.  It'd been a constant reminder every week that she was gone, probably for years if past trends held.  It was halfway through the stack of mail that he found something addressed to him.  Unmarked, except for the address to him._

 

'Probably some letter of condolence or something,' _he thought to himself as he reached for the letter opener.  Shick.  He pulled the letter out of the now open envelope and began to read._

_He raised an eyebrow.  Clinical testing for a new mind to machine interface.  Something of a dream of his for a very long time._  'Heh.  If it had only come a bit sooner...'  _He sighed._  '...It may well have not made any difference.  Curious I got one, though.' _He wondered if it was being sent to everyone on the block or something._

_He blinked, a tear in his eye.  More came.  He braced himself against the door, suddenly weak in the knees.  Somewhere within him a dam broke, and he began sobbing, for the first time in many years.  When he finally finished weeping, he decided to go and see what was going on.  He had nothing to lose, after all.  He had a few days to prepare, and he began to make a list of things he would need for a car trip._

 

\----0----

 

_He didn't bother going back to work, instead driving to the address listed in the letter.  It was either this or die.  It had always been that way, really.  Either strive toward world domination, or die alone and largely un-mourned._

_He'd changed plans for that.  Burning while in a coma wasn't good enough.  He'd go find some gang hideout instead, and see how long he lasted with a machete.  It'd be good to die on his feet.  He'd still burn everything, though.  Fuck the sharks._

_It was a long trip.  Almost across the country.  Most of it was spent on the interstate with his arm out the window blasting music at the highest volume his stereo could reach.  It was almost enough to make him forget what had happened, almost.  Enough to tune out his thoughts for a while, and just let the road pass peacefully beneath the tires of his car.  It was calming._

_He arrived at the place.  It was a gray, unmarked office building, two floors high, completely unlit and, judging from the graffiti, abandoned for quite some time.  He frowned, suspicious.  Maybe it was all some sort of gag?  If so maybe he'd stay alive a little longer just to see if he could figure out who was pranking him and introduce the prankster to his machete.  He shrugged all the same and pulled into a parking space.  It didn't matter, one way or another._

_He stopped at the entrance.  The dirt and grime encrusted the door handle looked like it hadn't been opened in a long time.  He looked around for a moment with a frown, but blinked when he looked up and to the side.  There was a camera there, and its surface shined with either newness or regular maintenance.  He raised his eyebrow and stared at the camera with a frown, trying to decide if he wanted whomever was watching to burn or not._

_Click._

_He looked down at the door, which was slowly opening inward.  He glanced back at the camera again before walking in._

_The interior was no less abandoned-looking.  Empty, stripped desks sat in lonely cubicles, each one with a bushel of wires poking out from behind to lie across the surface.  He paused and looked around for obvious directions._

_"To your left and straight ahead," said a female voice from above._

_He looked up, and noted that there was an ancient speaker almost directly above him.  Or at least the speaker cover was ancient.  He saw a glint of something that might have been a camera as well.  He thought of flipping it off and going out, but shrugged it off.  He didn't have anything to lose.  If it was a trap, maybe he could maul one of his entrappers before they bested him.  Glory in death.  He followed the directions of the speaker._

_Directions kept coming, and he followed.  One elevator ride later, and he realized the office building was just a front for whatever was going on here.  He was also greeted finally by an actual person._

 

\----0----

 

_The doctors didn't use names.  He was addressed as the subject, which he initially bristled at before he started shrugging it off, and they all went by Doctor.  None of them showed much outward emotion, either; always strictly professional, always clinically cold.  He started thinking of them as Doctors A through E, as he had only met the five of them so far.  It was Doctor B he was to talk to now._

_"This is your last chance to go back," said Doctor B, a vaguely attractive brunette he guessed to be in her late thirties.  "Once again, I am required to tell you that of the last ten whom have had this procedure performed on them, only one survived and he is now brain-dead.  We believe we have worked out the kinks, but understand this is a very risky procedure.  Your safety is not guaranteed.  If you decide to pull out now, we will give you an amnesiac and return you to your home."_

_There was no lying to himself.  The prospect of brain death was terrifying to him.  Physical death didn't frighten him in the least, but the prospect of losing his mind in such a way bothered him in ways that made his normally ice-free spine run with chills that ended in uncomfortable tingling in his neck._

_But he had decided already.  Nothing would stop him from the attempt.  Even if all that came from it was being able to control a computer with his mind, it would be worth it, if for no other reason than the advancement of science.  But there were other potential possibilities, he felt; and those were worth any price.  "I understood this the last five times you told me," he said tiredly after a moment.  "I have not changed my mind."_

_"I am not surprised," Doctor B said.  "As you know, you were chosen-"_

_"Because I have no close remaining family, don't have a significant other, likely suicidal, et cetera et cetera.  Someone that can just disappear without much question.  Can we get on with it?  If it's not the waiting that's killing me it's the repetition."_

_"...Right," Doctor B said.  "Then just fill this last form out."_

_"Swear to me that this is the last form.  You've already made me sign my life, soul, and first and second nonexistent children away.  I'm not sure what one more form is going to do that the others haven't."_

_"We have to make things very legal," Doctor B said.  "Nondisclosure agreements, anti-"_

_"Yes, can't talk, can't sue, can't do anything against your company if it kills me, I got it.  Just give me the damn form."_

_Doctor B gave him the form, and he jotted his signature and the date on it._

_"Don't even know why you bother with these bloody forms," he muttered almost under his breath as he signed it.  "No one would know anyway.  Wasn't that the point?  Someone easy to disappear?"_

_"It doesn't pay to keep ones bases uncovered in this business," Doctor B replied.  "We have to have legal contingency plans in place, just in case someone does look."_

_He shrugged and handed the form to the doctor._

_"Very good," Doctor B said, accepting the form.  "Now, if you'll just come with me..."_

 

\----0----

 

_Doctor B led him to another room, one that appeared to be an operating room.  Doctor D, a man with salt-and-pepper hair and a well-worn face, was also present.  Both of them began washing their hands at separate basins while he looked on._

_"Please, have a seat on the bed," Doctor B said, and he complied.  Doctor B finished washing her hands and walked over to him, holding a needle.  He held out his arm to the doctor, who swabbed the inside of his elbow and injected the contents of the needle into an artery._

_"Now if you would just lie back in the bed and count to thirty," Doctor B said._

_He did as asked.  "One, two, three..."_

_He almost made it to thirty._

 

\----0----

 

 _He woke up feeling, for lack of a better word,_ tingly _.  It was a subtle feeling, one that defied definition.  He'd never felt such a sensation before, though he had imagined something that was a shadow of the sensation once.  A sort of refreshing tingle was the closest he could come, each time he tried to put it into words._

 

_"He's coming around," said the voice of Doctor C, a short, balding, Japanese man with a face only a mother could love._

_"Well, let's see what we have then," Doctor E, a somewhat short, gray-haired man of apparent Indian ancestry said._

_"Think it's another vegetable?" asked the vaguely-accented voice of Doctor A, a tall, balding man with a build that more suggested someone who was a former professional athlete than scientist._

_"I hope not," Doctor B said.  "I'd rather not go back to the drawing board again."_

_He decided it was finally time to open his eyes and confront the doctors.  "I am uncertain, but I think that it's a success."_

_"Well, well, look at that," said Doctor E with a smile.  "He's doing better than the others already."_

_"I guess your efforts paid off then," Doctor A said with irritation._

_He wasn't sure, but he thought he saw Doctor A hand Doctor B a bit of money.  It would explain the attitude.  It would also be the first sign that they weren't robots in meat suits.  He decided to ask.  "What, taking bets?"_

_Doctor D looked back at A and B with a frown._

_"Ah..." Doctor B coughed._

_"Well, that's...  Er," Doctor A said._

_"Classy," he said.  "And in front of your patient no less."  He smirked at the two doctors._

_Doctor A alternated between looking at him and Doctor D._

_"Well, we weren't sure..." Doctor A began._

_"I'm just pulling your chains, doctors," he said.  "Besides, I'm happy that it worked, too."_

_"...Good," said Doctor D, apparently unwilling to press the matter.  "Now then, do you remember your name?"_

_"Does it matter?  You'll just call me Subject."  He watched the doctors look at one another, before doctor D shrugged._

_"And who am I?"  Doctor D asked._

_"Why, you're the doctah."_

_Doctor D cracked the barest hint of a smile.  "Am I the only doctor?"_

_"No, those guys behind you are also doctors.  Yes, all my dogs are barking, thank you."_

_"We have to make sure," Doctor D noted.  "Now, what are you here for?"_

_"Why, to go time traveling and to fight Daleks!"  At Doctor D's unimpressed frown, he snorted.  "Hmph.  Fine.  Testing your newfangled mind-to-machine interfaces, doctor."_

_"Heavens preserve us from sarcastic test subjects," Doctor C lamented._

_"...Are you aware of the date?"  Doctor D asked._

_"Unless you guys put me out for longer than I think, it should be Valentine’s Day.  Twenty thirty one."_

_"Alert and oriented times four," Doctor B announced._

_"Sounds that way," Doctor A agreed._

_"We'll see if that remains the case come morning," Doctor D announced.  "We have some technical tests to run, you shouldn't notice anything.  Get some rest, and we'll start training you to properly use the interface in the morning."_

_The doctors filtered out of the room, leaving him to his thoughts._

 

\----0----

 

_True to form, they started early in the day.  It went relatively simply at first.  Trying to figure out how to make a cursor on a screen move without moving his hands.  Controlling the movement of a robotic finger.  Making a robotic leg bend its knee._

_Over the next few days, the tasks became more complex.  Input letters on a computer.  Controlling a whole robot hand.  Making a pair of robotic legs move in a walking motion.  Once he had mastered the tasks to some degree, Doctor D gave him his next task._

_"These mind to machine interfaces work both ways," said Doctor D.  "Until now we haven't been able to test the_ write _function, however."_

 

_"Explain," he ordered._

_"We believe we can possibly sync two or more bodies at once using this interface," Doctor D said at last before pausing.  "The military applications-"_

_"Are obvious, yes," he agreed, hope lighting in his heart.  "So this is a government-funded operation?"_

_"...No," Doctor D said.  "Although, we are hoping to sell units to the government.  The units would be an excellent way of striking certain targets while giving a degree of plausible deniability to the United States.  We do not want to repeat of past events, after all."_

'Past events,' _of course, referred to the isolated Chinese/American war of 2030.  It had started in Thailand over a relatively innocuous event, but had rapidly escalated into a brutal, yet short-lived non-nuclear war.  It hadn’t lasted more than a week before both powers had reached a diplomatic agreement, with the United States giving a number of concessions to China._

_Relations were still strained however, and many in the United States were smarting from the blow to national pride.  While no one wanted a full scale war, except perhaps the terminally deluded, there wouldn’t be any tears shed by a lot of people if a third party started poking at China’s interests._

_"Ah," he said.  "So.  Indirectly government-funded."_

_"...If that is how you choose to describe it," Doctor D said._

_"We'll file that under semantic issues to be discussed later," he said.  "So what do you need me to do?"_

_"We're going to start easy.  Your history indicates that you have a fondness for science fiction movies?"_

_"That's right."_

_"How do you feel about trying to watch one in your head?"_

_"...Admittedly intrigued.  As long as it doesn't overwrite my phone number."_

_"That shouldn't be an issue."_

_"Well.  Break out the popcorn, then."_

 

\----0----

 

Bladerunner _remained a good movie, in spite of being almost 50 years old.  Watching it in his head was a new one on him, though._

 

\----0----

 

_His life over the next few months became one of practicing.  Practicing controlling parts.  Practice seeing things through cameras.  Practice feeling things through skin that was not his own.  Practice watching things with both his own and artificial eyes.  It was disorienting at first, but over time became almost natural._

_He threw himself into it.  If he did, he didn't think about his mum being dead too much.  He was still sad at her passing, but he finally felt that he had a purpose.  He wondered if she would be proud.  Maybe, he decided._

_The Doctors finally deemed it time to introduce a new element to the mix._

_"Ah, the promised body syncing," he said._

_"That's right," Doctor C said.  "You have been able to handle dealing with multiple sensory inputs for a bit now.  We think you may be able to handle two entire bodies at once."_

_"And not just a robot body," Doctor A said.  "This is a clone body, from your own genetic material."_

_"From my own cells?  How long have you been planning this?"_

_"Since a little bit before you got the letter," said Doctor A._

_"And you've had time to grow a whole new body?"_

_"Not exactly," Doctor C said.  "We...  Well, we more built the body."_

_"So it is a robot body."_

_"On the contrary," said Doctor C.  "It may be a construct, but it's a genuine human body."_

_"How did you grow it so....  No, wrong question.  How did you make it, then?"_

_"With stem cells, scaffolds, and nanomachines," Doctor C said._

_"Ah."_

_"Do you feel like you're ready to attempt this?" Doctor A asked._

_"As I'll ever be."_

 

\----0----

 

_He looked down at the body in front of him.  It could be him, if he dropped about sixty kilograms and was about 25 years younger.  Doctor D had told him that the device was already synchronizing their brains, essentially copying his neural pattern into the brain of the body in front of him._

_The doctor in question inserted a needle into the arm of the body, and a few seconds later, he was suddenly aware of another presence._

_It wasn't like before, with the robotic parts.  This wasn't just extra sensory data.  There was another mind, there.  It mirrored his own, but it was there, mingling with his own, slippery and dark.  He opened his eyes, only to realize they were already open.  He looked down at the clone body, which looked up at him._

'Ah,' _he/they thought._

 

\----0----

 

_It took him a few weeks to get used to being in two bodies at once.  Having two brains to share the load made the process significantly easier.  They added another body, and it only took a week to get used to it.  Then another.  Then another.  Then another.  Each body added to his growing consciousness became easier to handle._

_He always watched the process, when he could.  Protein scaffolds in the shape of internal organs, bone, and muscle were implanted with stem cells, and then allowed to soak in a nutrient broth.  He was told the raw material was mainly spare pig meat, which he found slightly amusing given his tendency to overact.  Never before had he been more literal when he called himself a ham._

_When the cells finished growing into the scaffold, the newly minted organs were saturated with nanomachines and pieced together like a particularly morbid 3D puzzle.  The nanomachines joined the parts together, and started nerve impulses to give the homunculus a semblance of life.  He found the process fascinating to watch._

_The implantation process was equally interesting, if much shorter.  There was a hole left in the top of the cranium, which the finished device was simply slipped inside.  It was almost anticlimactic.  But interesting, particularly as the nanomachines in the device itself sealed the opening behind it._

_It was a curious design.  No special surgery or fanfare, just slip it into a head and let it work.  He wondered about that._

 

\----0----

 

_"We have a new test for you," Doctor C announced to him a few days after he had integrated his 200th body into his growing hivemind._

_"And that is?"_

_"There is an alternate use for the mind-to-machine interface," Doctor C stated.  "It can be implanted into another person forcibly, and we believe it can be used to extract information from them."_

_"...Forcibly?"  Suddenly, the design of the mind to machine interface made all too much sense._

_"That's right," Doctor C said.  "We believe it can be useful both as a training tool for your post-individualistic matrix, as well as a means of quick field interrogation."_

_"So..."  He stroked his chin thoughtfully.  "You want me to... invade a mind?"_

_"In essence, that's exactly what we want you to do."_

_"...I see.  I assume you have some sort of, er... volunteer, for this?"_

_"That is correct.  A mister James Applegate, former US marine.  Has been court-martialed, and was scheduled to be executed.  We, ah, appropriated the man for this experiment."_

 

'How high does this go?' _he wondered idly.  "Can I see him?"_

_"Of course.  Right this way."_

_Doctor C led him down a hall toward where he had first become, in his mind,_ 'distributed;' _where he had first tasted having more than one body.  A young man lay in the same gurney his first alternate body had once occupied, an IV drip apparently keeping the young man sedated._

_"Well, here he is," Doctor C announced._

_He looked around, noticing the other four doctors watching from a good vantage point in a previously unnoticed observation booth on the second floor.  He looked back down at the ex-marine on the table._

 

'Come on old son,' _he asked himself,_ 'how far are we going to take this?  Isn't this enough?'   _He frowned at the man on the gurney._   'If we do this, what will it mean?  What will we have done?  Will this action betray our principles?  Before, it was just us at risk.  Now...'  _He clasped the side rail on the gurney and hung his head._ 'Now there's someone else here.  If it works, it'll basically be killing them.  Maybe worse, like... mind-rape.  Are we sure we want to do this?'

 

_He sighed.  He knew the answer already.  He had for a long time.  His principles had a price tag attached.  A high price, perhaps, but..._

_"Very well.  I am...  I am prepared to attempt this experiment of yours."_

_"Very good," Doctor C said, holding out one of the mind to machine interfaces.  "I will leave the insertion up to you.  We have already taken the liberty of removing the necessary section in the skull for the procedure.  Just slip the device inside."_

_He accepted the device without expression, and looked down at it.  Such a small thing.  About the size of the dog tags the man must have once worn.  It looked like he could bend and break it in his hands if he tried.  His fingers told him a different story however, as he let them squeeze the unit relatively gently.  It was solid as a rock, despite its thinness._

_He grit his teeth.  It was wrong.  He knew it was wrong.  What would his mum think, if she could see what he was about to do?_

_He lifted the man's head, and inserted the device._

_"Good," Doctor C said.  "Now just think about activating the device, and it should interface with mister Applegate.  In theory, all his knowledge will then be yours."_

_He thought, and the tiny radio transmitter in the device in his head sent its message to the device in Applegate's head.  In an instant, their minds were connected._

_He could feel Applegate's consciousness, so very much unlike his own, yet so very much alike.  It was a bit like feeling a hard glass marble, smooth and impenetrable.  His mind reached out, feeling the contours of the man's mind, seeking an entrance._

_There was none.  He decided to make one._

_His consciousness slammed into Applegate's mind.  Hard.  The surface of his mind shattered, and he could feel waves of emotion come with it.  Terror.  Horror.  Confusion.  He ripped at the edges of the man's mind.  Flaying.  Consuming.  Dissolving the essence that made up another mind._

_He knew James Applegate.  Son of Nancy and Eliot Applegate.  He had been court-martialed for raping and killing unarmed Thai civilians in the isolated China/America war of 2030.  Wasn't actually guilty, but all signs pointed to him.  Applegate had been a good man.  Now Applegate's mind was dying._

_He decided that he would try to find out who framed Applegate, if he could.  It would have to come later._

_He continued to eat his knowledge, his experiences.  It was the finest meal, the finest drink, almost drug-like in its taste.  Instant knowledge.  All he had to do was violate a person's mind, rip it apart, plunder the contents, and inhabit the shell of what had once been a thinking, feeling person._

_He felt dirty.  He knew that if all went to plan, it wouldn't be the last mind he would destroy like this, and the thought made him feel ugly.  He wanted to vomit, but swallowed the bile back down._

_"We are reading a lot of data being transferred," Doctor C announced.  "Are you getting anything?"_

_"Ung....  No, it's all....  It's all jumbled," he lied.  "I don't think we're operating in the same system.  It's just... garbage data."_

_"Damn it," Doctor C said.  "I was afraid of that.  Well, do you have control of the body, at least?"_

_"...Yes.  Yes I think so."_

_"Well, keep it then, I see no reason to let it go to waste."_

_"As you will....  Damn, my head hurts.  Can't believe I did that for nothing."_

_"It wasn't for nothing.  One way or another, we've gleaned valuable data."_

_"I hope so, I do.  I was able to feel one thing off of him."_

_"What is that?"_

_"Terror.  I think...  I think he knew what I was doing do him."_

_"I see."_

_"Don't ask me to do this again, doctor."_

_"Very well.  There is little point in it if it can't be used as a training tool anyway."_

_"Yeah."_

_As Doctor C walked off, doubtlessly to join the other doctors, he stood there and looked down at James Applegate._

_A plan started forming in his head.  It would hurt though.  And the risks were high.  But the possible reward..._


	24. And I Am Legion, Part 2

_The doctors brought in a drill instructor to begin teaching him basic military tactics.  He began somewhat sloppily at first, the result of Applegate not having the greatest marks and compounded by him faking being completely new at it._

_Practice made perfect, however.  He practiced the techniques constantly.  Always, there were clones of himself practicing in the firing range, tossing grenades, using bayonets, and running the obstacle course._

_He didn't give himself any breaks; to stop was to think about what he had done, and what he planned to do.  He knew he would have to confront that, sooner or later.  It would have to wait, though.  He couldn't falter, not before his plans had seen fruition._

_The drill instructor began to teach him more advanced tactics.  Hand to hand combat, military style.  Repair and maintenance of weaponry.  Even a bit on operating vehicles.  Everything one might need for a special unit._

_He decided it was about time to make his move._

_\----0----_

_The entire facility was underground, and fairly extensive.  It was well fed by air vents.  Many of them were big enough for a man to shimmy down.  When they weren't training, the clone bodies were kept in dormitories, fifty per unit.  The air vents fed those too.  The dormitories were also monitored by camera, as well as a small number of guards.  He had a solution for that.  It also happened to solve his not having controller chips._

_In dormitory three, fifty of his bodies slept.  Then forty nine.  The now awake body began to scream.  The other bodies didn't stir.  One of the guards entered, covered by another guard as he made his way over to see what the problem was._

_Another body began to scream.  And another.  The guard who was covering the first turned to first one of the screaming ones, then the other.  The first screamer lunged at the first guard.  His gun hadn't been drawn, and he was forced to wrestle with the body.  Only one of them cared about surviving, however._

_The second guard drew his gun, only to be assaulted by another screamer whom came from the side.  It sunk its teeth into the guard's arm.  More bodies began screaming, drowning out the screams of the guards as they began to get bitten._

_The screamers started attacking them and each other.  Pain met hatred of self, and drove him to greater and greater degrees of brutality.  Biting, punching, clawing, kicking...  No holds were barred.   He experienced his first death as one of his bodies dashed the head of another against the floor, spilling the contents of the cranium._

_As they fought, a clone body, as yet unmolested, reached over from its position on the floor and grabbed the mind-to-machine interface from the downed body.  Another body had used a quarter to unscrew the vent plating in the chaos.  The body with the interface put it in its mouth and went in.  The other body screwed the plate back on as guards started pouring in, before it joined in the melee and started getting bites taken from it._

_The crunching of bones and raw meat being consumed resounded behind the body with the interface as it shimmied down the air vent as quietly as it could._

 

\----0----

 

"Wait, you...  You..."  Kyou was at a loss for words.

 

"Cannibalized myself?" Okazaki finished.

 

Furukawa fainted again.

 

"I-I think I-I'm going to be sick..."  Fujibayashi said, her face tinged green as she stood unsteadily and made her way to the restroom.

 

Kotomi stared at her hands blankly.

 

Tomoyo sat back in her chair, staring into space.

 

Sunohara just looked at Okazaki, agape.

 

"Kyou," Okazaki said, as he held up the bottle of smelling salts.  "I think it's best if you do it this time."

 

"U-um..."  Kyou stuttered, something Okazaki hadn't actually seen happen before.

 

Okazaki sighed and tossed the bottle at her gently.  She caught it and stared down at it for a minute with wide eyes before opening it and bringing it under Furukawa's nose.

 

Furukawa coughed and bolted upright.  "Oh...  Oh...  I think..."

 

"Are you alright, Furukawa?"

 

"Eep!" Furukawa exclaimed as she looked over at Okazaki, wide eyed and pale.  "I...  I have to go."  She stood and fled, arms flailing wildly as she made her escape.  Moments after she disappeared from view, the sound of a door opening and slamming shut could be heard.

 

Okazaki shook his head.  It couldn't be helped.

 

Fujibayashi came back into the room, looking pale as she flopped down into her chair.

 

"It's important that I continue," Okazaki said.  In spite of the fact that he knew he was ruining his friendships, he still felt better than he had in a long time.  It was a relief to finally tell his story to someone.  Indeed, it was almost therapeutic.

 

"I..."  Fujibayashi started, and then shut her mouth.

 

Okazaki continued.

 

\----0----

 

_It had taken the guards time to stop the rogue bodies and their fighting.  By the end of it, the original two guards that had entered were quite dead, and quite picked clean.  So too were a number of his bodies.  The bones were strewn over the entire dorm.  The few bodies that had survived the brawl in dormitory 3 had to be killed to a one by gunfire; their snarling rushing toward the storming guards taken for the hostile action it was._

_His body in the vents had been able to move relatively quickly from the dormitory in the chaos, but was forced to go slowly, a centimeter at a time, as it moved down the air duct.  It was the only way to be anything close to silent in the enclosed environment.  He knew roughly which direction to go, but didn't know the layout.  He had to make educated guesses._

_The other bodies had submitted to being restrained as the staff tried to work out what had happened.  He claimed he had no knowledge of what had happened when the doctors had asked.  As far as he had known, he claimed, nothing bad had happened, save that suddenly he couldn’t feel fifty of his bodies anymore.  They had eventually left him alone two hours later to have a meeting over the issue._

_The body in the vent took over a day to move 100 meters of duct to the room of Doctor A.  Some of that was wrong turns in the dark, but mostly it was just it being judiciously slow.  One of its wrong turns offered it a measure of solace, however, as it overheard Doctors B and D discuss what had happened three hours into its trip._

_"He's lying, you know," Doctor D said._

_"Those are extreme actions to take, if so," Doctor B noted._

_"Then his plan is big, whatever it is.  I don't like this."_

_"I'm certain it's a mechanical error.  Who in his right mind would do such a thing like that?"_

_"That's just it.  I'm positive he's crazy.  You've seen him during the live fire exercises."_

_"He didn't repeat that again.  We were lucky to stabilize that clone."_

_"That was still the action of someone unafraid to die."_

_"That's rather what we were training them for, isn't it?"_

_"You know what I mean.  There's something not right about this situation."_

_"It's too late for that now," Doctor B noted.  "Corporate is breathing down our necks.  They want results, not setbacks.  We terminate him, we're back, literally, to square one.  We'd all be fired."_

_"I think it may be worth the risk," Doctor D said.  "Whatever he's planning-"_

_"Won't be happening.  They're all restrained."_

_"I still don't like it."_

_"You don't have to like it.  These are my orders.  We'll figure out what went wrong.  Then we'll fix it.  And then we'll collect our percentage.  Come now.  Having money in this day and age is a good thing, right?"_

_"I hope you're right.  Dear God, I hope you're right."_

_The body continued, mulling the situation over with the rest of its mind._

_\----0----_

_The body finally reached the room of Doctor A.  The doctor was still there, which was fine.  It sat and watched in the vent, silently as possible.  It was two hours before he left his room to go elsewhere, and the body began to unscrew the screws holding the vent cover to the wall from the inside, scratching his fingers up in the process._

_It took the better part of an hour, but he managed to work the cover loose that way, and it fell outward with a clatter.  He slid out of the vent, hoping that its fall hadn't been heard.  He slotted it on and gave the screws a quick twist before ducking behind the bed.  When no one entered the room, he deemed it safe to finish screwing the plate back to the wall and have a look around the room._

_It was rather spartan, truth be told.  A desk with a laptop sat near the vent, with an unassuming office chair in front of the desk.  There was a queen-sized bed taking up most of the room, with plain white covers and pillows.  Opposite the desk was a closet, with bifold doors with slats in them._

_He at least knew where he would be hiding.  Still, he was disappointed.  There was nothing sharp in the room.  He had hoped to find something that he could use to pierce the top of the doctor's cranium.  Something that wouldn't be immediately obvious.  Still, he had a backup plan.  He always had a backup plan._

_He hid in the closet.  A bit cliché, but he worked with what he had.  His backup plan was partially thwarted when he noticed that the coat hangers inside were plastic, not metal.  He shrugged though, took one of the plastic hangers, broke off a straight section of it, and began chewing on the end._

_It was still a little over eight hours before Doctor A returned to the room.  The body tensed up.  The next moments would be telling._

_The doctor put his lab coat over the back of his chair before sitting down in it and rubbing his eyes for a moment while leaning back in the chair._

_The body in the closet rolled his eyes.  The suspense was killing him.  He resisted sighing when the doctor opened his laptop and began typing._

_He spent an agonizingly tense hour standing in the closet before Doctor A finally stopped typing and closed the laptop.  The doctor stood up and went to the closet, reaching out to open it.  Then the doctor stopped with a blink, and looked into the body's eyes through the slats that made up the closet's door._

_The body's hand flew through the thin wood slats of the closet and clamped on the doctor's throat before he could yell, and dragged him forward.  The doctor clasped at the body's hand, but it was too late.  The body's other hand drove the sharp tip of the coat hanger he had whittled down with his teeth into the softest part of Doctor A's skull.  Twice.  Three times.  A hole was opened, even as the doctor's eyes rolled backward into his head._

_The body brought the mind-to-machine interface to the man's cranium, and slipped it into the jagged, open wound._

_\----0----_

_It wasn't like Applegate, he reflected.  Where before there had been a sense of smoothness to the mind, like a glass marble, Doctor A's mind was more fluid.  Like putty, perhaps.  Mobile putty, that even as he struggled to strip layers away, also sought to peel away at his own mind._

_He fought it.  Fighting was his one asset in life.  And distributed as he was, there was more of him to keep his mind from truly losing anything.  The doctor's mind, however..._

_He stripped away layers, and the doctor's resistance to his mental assault grew more and more feeble.  A few mind-bending seconds later, the doctor's mind simply shattered._

_There was something wrong this time though.  He had... a good deal of the information in his head.  Enough, barely, to emulate the late doctor whose body he now wore.  But so much was also lost from the fight he put up.  There was enough info for a number of things to connect the dots, make the next attempt easier... but mostly there was just a bunch of gaps where there should have been knowledge.  He cursed softly, and then shrugged._

_There were still four other scientists in the compound.  Then there were the guards.  One thing about it though, he wouldn't ever implant the device into an awake mind again if it could be helped.  Too much to be lost that way._

_Either way, the facility would be his now, one way or another._

_He had work to do._

_\----0----_

_His first task as Doctor A, real name Andrei Petrov, son of Russian immigrants Rayna and Vikinti Petrov, skilled neurosurgeon, was to retrieve a number of mind to machine interfaces and some injectable sedatives.  Then it was to bring Doctor B into the fold._

_Doctor B, real name Nancy Preshing, daughter of Mia and Jacob Petrov, world class nanotechnology expert, had been surprisingly easy to corner.  She and Andrei had been in a semi-serious relationship.  He wore Andrei's body, and had called her to his room.  When the door had shut, his bodies grabbed her and forced a mind to machine interface into her head.  He would never forget the betrayed expression she wore when she realized her fate._

_Nancy was a godsend in ways.  He was able to fill in a number of gaps in his knowledge using what she knew.  It also simplified the matter of capturing Doctor E.  Even so, using her body in such a manner was also more than a little awkward for him, given that he was straight.  Using it to seduce Doctor E, real name Naasih Gutpa, son of Wafiya and Chahel Gutpa, who was another world class neurosurgeon, had been decidedly unpleasant._

_He did what he had to, however, and he needed to know if he could do it at all.  Nancy’s and Andrei’s bodies ambushed him in Nancy's room, and he breathed a sigh in relief, resolving never to use that method again if it could possibly be avoided._

_Andrei and Naasih simply closed Doctor D, real name Paul Rosenberg, son of Patricia and Peter Rosenberg, robotics expert, in the breakroom and performed the procedure there._

_Doctor C, real name Tanaka Daichi, son of Tanaka Hotaru and Katsuro, nanotechnology expert, had been ambushed in a closed door 'group meeting.'  The same tactic worked to take the guard captain.  The guards became his similarly.  Even the drill sergeant whom had trained him turned easy prey when faced with all of the guards of the facility knocking on his door._

_The facility was his by the end of the week._

_\----0----_

_He didn't stop there, of course.  He started using the company to call in experts from all the fields he could think of.  Then he sent them back, with special packages he had devised with the help of the knowledge he had mindripped from his new bodies and produced with the nanofactory present at his now base of operations._

_He sent the drill sergeant back to his base, with a number of mind-to-machine interfaces to go along with his special package.  Taking the sergeant's base had been tricky, but he had done it.  From there he began to carefully work on compromising nuclear capable bases, both as a denial tactic and as a trump card._

_His experience and influence grew.  So did his disgust with his own methods.  But he couldn't stop.  To stop would be to weaken himself.  To weaken himself would be to throw himself under a tank's treads when it came time to begin his assault.  It was a shame, but he did what he had to._

_He wondered, idly, if mum would still be proud of him.  If she would have still supported him._

_He sincerely doubted it.  If anything, it would have tested the capacity for the supposedly boundless love of a mother._

_But what was done was done.  There was only thing to do, only one constant.  And that is that one must always go forward._

_He set some of his new drones out to use their packages in far, out of the way places.  It took years, but the miniature nanofactories were able to excavate a base and turn the materials into large cannon.  They fired projectiles with their own miniaturized nanofactories inside at equally far, out of the place locations._

_He was unamused, surprised, and annoyed when they were destroyed, either in the air or shortly after having landed.  Even if he had a backup plan, the fact that somewhere out there, someone knew where the things were and where they were landing was cause for utmost concern._

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A Note From The Author**

 

Well, there you have it.  Our villainous origin story, or “how to fail the ‘what you are in the dark’ test.”


	25. Alea Iacta Est, Part 1

**An IMPORTANT Note From The Author:**

 

~~In this day and age, time is rather at a premium.  I am finding that I have less and less time to work on things, and I just don’t think I can keep going like this.  I really wanted to finish this, but I just don’t think I’ll be able to.  So... yeah.  Premature endings, and all that.  Sorry, guys.~~

~~...~~

~~...~~

~~...~~

~~...~~

~~...~~

~~Yeah, I don’t know who I’m trying to fool, particularly on the day for fools.  Word count’s a dead giveaway, if nothing else.  Hmph.  Anyway, have some story.~~

 

It really was an April fool’s Day joke.  I’m not going anywhere.

 

**-0-0-0-0-0-0-**

 

Fujibayashi stared at Okazaki, hands over her mouth and tears streaming from her wide open eyes.  Tomoyo hadn't moved from her slumped back position, and continued to stare out into space.  Sunohara mirrored her, his hands clutching the ends of his chair hard enough to leave his knuckles white.  Kotomi had tears in her eyes, too; eyes that had not once moved from her hands.  Kyou stared at Okazaki expressionlessly.

 

"There are a few more items of note," Okazaki began.

 

"To-  Okazaki san," Kyou said, causing him to blink.  "I-I can't hear any more.  This is...  I'm sorry."  She stood up quickly and made her way to leave.  Fujibayashi stood as well.

 

"Fujibayashi."

 

"E-Eh?"

 

"Three days from now, I will be leaping out of a window in class.  For your safety, please, stay away from the windows when I do.  Ensure everyone else does, too."

 

She didn't say anything, simply turned and ran after her sister.

 

He heard the door slam behind them and shook his head. _'Burning all of my bridges...  Maybe it's better now, than when things start.'_

 

"Y-You're kidding about all of this, right Okazaki?" Sunohara asked, a nervous smile on his face as he released the chair from his death grip and stood.  "This is all some sort of joke, right?"

 

"This is no joke, Sunohara," Okazaki said.  "No gag, no punch line.  That is exactly what happened.  My gods.  I wish I were kidding."  He rubbed his eyes.

 

"H-heh...  You think you know a guy, huh..."  Sunohara stood unsteadily, and began walking woodenly toward the door.

 

"My warning about staying away from the window extends to you, too."  Okazaki raised an eyebrow.  "I assume you don't want to hear the rest?"

 

Sunohara yelped.  "Ah, no, no, I think I should, I think I should be going," he said, and ran for the door.

 

Okazaki shook his head again as he heard the door close.

 

Tomoyo rose, her eyes focused straight ahead.

 

Okazaki regarded her with a small frown.  "You know where the door is, too."

 

"You're unbelievable," she said, as she turned to glare at him.  "I can't..."

 

"I know," he said.

 

"To think I cooked for you.  Accepted your help.  You....  You're a monster!"

 

"I know that, too."

 

"I'm going to tell everyone.  They have to know."

 

"They won't listen," Okazaki said.  "And even if they do, it won't matter.  There is nothing they would do differently."  Which was true.  Once he made contact with his past self, he'd ended up focused on his effort to take out the rest of the world's armies.  The Japanese would still send out elements of the SDF all the same, and those would be completely destroyed.  It wouldn't cause a paradox.

 

In either event, he couldn't think of a good reason to stop her from telling people at this point.  Nor a good way to do so, for that matter.  He wasn't going to kill any friends, not if he could help it.  Even if she might not consider him a friend any longer.  What was done was done.

 

He wished, though, that he could keep an eye on her.  But his past self was watching the city now, he knew.  His optically camouflaged elements couldn't go in the open anymore; his past self would be able to see them.  He couldn't risk going around without optical camouflage; too easy to be seen by others, on top of possibly drawing his past self's attention.  He would just have to ride it out.

 

"Be that as it may," she said, and turned to leave.  The door slammed behind her.

 

He sighed and looked over at Kotomi, who continued to stare at her hands.  As he gazed at her, he felt strangely numb.  He hadn't known what to expect with the others.  But he also wasn't entirely surprised either.  How Kotomi would react, however...

 

"Kotomi chan."

 

She flinched and looked up at him.

 

He sighed.  "I...  Didn't want to tell you.  Perhaps it's selfish of me, but I didn't want you to think... ill, of me."  He let his head fall into his hand.  "Argh.  Of course it's selfish.  I don't...  I...  I'm sorry, Kotomi chan.  I just..."  He shook his head, unable to continue.

 

"...Why?"

 

Such a simple word.  Okazaki flinched at it all the same, cut to the bone.  He swallowed.  "I..."

 

"...Please.  Tell me.  Tell me you did it for everyone.  Tell me it's because you wanted to see everyone happy."  Tears came to her eyes, and she wiped them away.  "Tell me it's because you wanted to see this world be beautiful.  Tell me..."  She sobbed.

 

He clenched his fist.  "...I did.  I was tired of seeing people suffer.  Tired of watching people in power abuse those without.  Tired of....  Tired of a lot of things.  I thought I could make everyone happy, or at least satisfied.  Thought I could raise the standard of living.  Thought....  Thought I could do a lot of things.  My methods, though... I became that which I hated.  I thought... the ends would justify the means."

 

He shook his head and looked down at his hands.  "I've done so much.  Too much.  It's part of why I pushed you away earlier.  I knew you couldn't forgive me of my crimes.  Knew I didn't deserve to be forgiven.  Kotomi chan...  I'm sorry."  He heard her stand, and looked at her as she walked to him.

 

"...I can't forgive you," she said, and he flinched.  "It isn't my place.  But..."

 

He blinked as she wrapped her arms around his head and hugged him to her.  "...Kotomi chan?"

 

"...Maybe it's wrong.   But I still....  For so long you were my only friend.  And... maybe..."  She turned her head to the side with a blush.  "I can't just..."

 

"Kotomi chan..."

 

"...You said you wouldn't leave me.  I won't leave you either."

 

He wrapped his arms around her.  "Kotomi chan..."  He blinked, feeling a sudden wetness on his cheeks.  _'I'm... crying.'_  The realization brought still more tears as they clutched each other.

 

It was several minutes before he regained control of his emotions.  Ushio's words came back to him.  _"Kotomi will suffer.  She will perhaps suffer the worst."_   He grit his teeth at that, uncertain what it meant.  Did it mean he would push her away, and make her suffer that way?  Or that she would suffer at his side?  _'Or does it mean that Ushio was screwing with our heads?  I don't think I'd put it past her.'_

 

His teeth ground.  There was no right answer to what he should do.  But maybe if he was there, maybe he could help her cope with whatever came.  He couldn't leave her now, one way or another.

 

He disengaged himself from her hug and held her at arm's length.

 

"Kotomi chan....  Thank you.  I..."  He shook his head.  "I hope you don't have cause to regret this, later.  I really do hope that."

 

She shook her head with a small smile.  "...As long as I am at your side, I shall have no regrets."

 

"Kotomi chan..."  He sighed.  "I should have addressed this so much sooner.  I've known... for a while now, how you feel."

 

She looked to the side with a frown and a blush.  He reached up and cupped her cheek, turning her head toward him gently.

 

"I didn't do anything about it, because I didn't know what to do.  I thought it was wrong.  I still think it's wrong.  But..."  He sighed.  _'Is this the wrong thing to do?  The right?  I don't know.  I wish I did.  But I don't think I can do anything else.'_

 

She blinked at him and tilted her head to the side in confusion.

 

He couldn't help but smile a little at her.  "Kotomi chan.  For a long time, I've been... alone.  Since my last life.  Since before I did... everything I did.  I knew that eventually, my ways, my bloodlust, my urges for violence... eventually anyone I got near would be corrupted by my ways, at the best.  I didn't want that.  Knew that, even discounting that, I was ill suited for relationships."

 

He shook his head.  "It was a hard decision, but I felt at the time that it was the right one.  I... made a pact with myself, to always remain alone.  And I upheld that pact for the rest of my life.  And all of this one, as well.  Deals, pacts, agreements... they're very important to me.  Which, seeing you say something like that..."

 

He shook his head again.  "Look.  Kotomi chan.  I... have to admit that I... do feel something for you as well."

 

She blinked and blushed deeper.

 

"But Kotomi chan.  Such a pact as I made is important to me.  I can't just... go and break it so easily.  And there's so much that is going to happen in the following year... almost all of it bad..."  He sighed.  "Kotomi chan.  I...  Maybe it's wrong of me to ask this of you.  But... if you still feel the same for me after the year has passed....  Maybe I've kept that pact too long."

 

He sighed again.  "If you still feel the same for me at the end of this year, then... maybe I can throw this shackle away."

 

She didn't respond to him, except to sit and lean against him.  For once, he thought maybe that would be alright in the end.

 

As they sat together, they started talking more about the technology that he used.  As he talked, her hand found his, and he gave it a gentle squeeze before entwining his fingers with hers.  They eventually fell asleep like that.

 

\----0----

 

The fragment of Okazaki that had left Kotomi's house before he began his explanation returned to his house through the elevator.  Though he thought perhaps things might be alright with Kotomi, the fact still remained that his past self was due in only a few days; the second day after his suspension ended, to be exact.

 

He felt tired.  More tired than could be attributed to the fact that he was about to face off against his past self.  More tired even than the fact that this would mark the beginnings of when things started going bad for his past self.

 

No, he was feeling like the situation was wrong.  Some instinct telling him that things were going to go horribly awry.  He grit his teeth and clamped down on the emotion.  He wouldn't risk a paradox destroying everything on Ushio's words; he certainly wasn't going to risk one for such a dubious sensation.

 

\----0----

 

At Kotomi's house, morning came to Okazaki and Kotomi.  He shook her awake gently.

 

"...Huh?"

 

"You need to start getting ready for school, I think," Okazaki said.

 

"...Ah."  She nodded and stood, releasing his hand.

 

Instantly, he missed the warmth.

 

She paused and looked at him.  "...Um, do you want me to stay?"

 

"No, no....  Go to school.  I'll be fine."  He smiled at her.

 

"...Alright," she said, and walked out of the room.

 

He smiled to himself, just a little.  Then he frowned.  He couldn't shake the feeling that there was something bad on the horizon.  Something beyond what he knew.  He wished he knew the source of the ill omen.  He frowned deeper and shook his head.  _'Paranoia.  Gotta be.'_

 

He put on another smile as he saw Kotomi come into the room.  He watched as she looked at him, and then glanced aside for a moment.

 

"...See you later," she said at last, with a small blush.

 

He blinked, but kept the smile up.  "Goodbye, Kotomi chan."

 

She walked out the door, leaving him shaking his head.

 

\----0----

 

At his house, Okazaki was completely unsurprised when Tomoyo did not show up in the morning.  He shrugged it off.  Certainly, he couldn't blame her.  What he had done...  Truly, she was right.  He _was_ a monster.  But there was little he could do about that at this point.  The blood was already on his hands, more blood than he could ever hope to wash away.

 

The only thing he could do was ensure no more had to needlessly suffer.  Make sure Kotomi didn't suffer, no matter what Ushio claimed would happen.  Maybe he could do it.  Maybe in time his friends would see him as a friend again.  Maybe after all was said and done, maybe he could, just possibly, redeem himself to some degree.

 

"And maybe pigs will fly," he said to himself.  But what else could he do but try?

 

He picked up the parts of the broken projector from his desk and sat them in front of him.  Then he turned on the television and watched Babylon 5 while putting the unit back together.  Sometimes, he felt very much like Londo; trying to do what he felt was best for his species, but watching as his ambition-tainted efforts twisted in on themselves and left him out of control, on a collision course with a horrifying destiny.

 

A knock on his door interrupted his musings.  He paused the show and looked out to see Oogami looking into the window with a frown.  He raised an eyebrow and walked over to the door to open it.

 

"Okazaki," Oogami greeted.

 

"Oogami san."

 

"You have the projector ready?"

 

"Yeah.  Just finished it, actually."

 

"Good.  May I come in?"

 

"Ah, sure."  Okazaki moved out of the way to let Oogami in.

 

"Sunohara's moving out of the dorms," Oogami stated as he shed his shoes at the door.

 

Okazaki blinked, and then frowned.  "...I see."

 

"I asked him why.  He said he was moving back home.  Asked him about that, and he told me to ask you."

 

"...Ask me?"  Okazaki raised an eyebrow.

 

"So you don't know anything about it?"  Oogami rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

 

"This is the first I've heard about him moving away," Okazaki said.

 

"Huh.  Well, there's another thing, too.  That girl you were with...  Sakagami Tomoyo, I think?  She's been saying some unusual things."

 

"Has she now?"  Okazaki frowned again _.  '...Ah.  She's attacking me, not my past self.  That's what I was forgetting.  ...Isn’t it?  Either way, that might complicate things...  Why didn't I think of that?  Ushio?'_

 

"Yeah.  I mean, obviously it can't be true, but still.  Fair warning, you've pissed her off somehow."  Oogami wore an amused smirk.

 

Okazaki's frown deepened.  "Hm."  _'What is done is done.  There's no stopping it now.  Just damage control.  I'll have to think on this...'_

 

"Look, you're an adult now, I can't tell you what to do," Oogami said, and put a hand on Okazaki's shoulder.  "However, I feel you should know that if you were in some sort of relationship with her that went south, well, they do have laws against that sort of thing..."

 

Okazaki gently brushed the hand off his shoulder with a frown.  "Oogami san, while I do appreciate the concern, I find the insinuation to be mildly offensive."

 

"Hey, I'm just saying."

 

He sighed.  "Yeah.  Yeah, I know.  Sorry, I've just not had a good day."

 

"You need to talk about it?"

 

Okazaki shook his head.  "No....  No, thank you.  It's not important."

 

"Heh, well, alright."  Oogami shook his head, and then pointed at the repaired projector on the table.  "That's it, right?"

 

"Indeed so."  Okazaki picked it up and handed it to Oogami.  "Good luck with that."

 

"Yeah, no problem."  Oogami put it under his arm.  "You know, about that.  I think this is gonna have to be the last time."

 

"Oh?"

 

"Yeah.  Sakagami's intent on spilling the beans about this too.  Koumura agrees.  We shouldn't have done this in the first place."

 

"I see."  Okazaki sighed.  "It can't be helped, then."

 

"I suppose not.  Try not to get in trouble, huh?"

 

"Don't worry about me.  I won't be causing the school any further trouble."

 

"What's that supposed to mean?"

 

"It means that any trouble I cause from here on in won't be to the school."

 

"What, are you leaving, too?"

 

"Not in the least."

 

"What, cleaning up your act then?"  Oogami smirked at Okazaki.

 

"Something like that."  Okazaki smiled thinly.

 

"Heh, well, about time then.  Anyway, I gotta go.  Try not to piss off any other girls, huh?"

 

"Heh.  Yeah."

 

With that, Oogami put on his shoes again and left the house.  Okazaki listened to the sound of a car pulling away before sitting back down to watch Babylon 5.  He listened to it as he plotted how to minimize the damage that Tomoyo was causing.


	26. Alea Iacta Est, Part 2

The remaining day and a half of suspension passed quickly.  Okazaki continued to teach Kotomi about the mind-to-machine interface, while at his house he watched Babylon 5.  Soon it would be an end of such peaceful days, he knew.  The phrase _"the calm before the storm"_ sprung to mind.  When he came back the day after detention, the feeling only grew.

 

Sunohara's seat was empty.  While that was a normal event, the fact that his friend wouldn't be returning to it ever again brought a frown to his face.  It was a bridge burned, no matter how much water he could pour on it.

 

Fujibayashi, a few seats in front of him, sat with unnatural stillness, and was quick to leave when the day ended.  He wondered briefly if she went to the theater clubroom, and then thought idly about dropping by the room to see if anyone had bothered meeting.

 

He decided not to.  Even if they decided to meet, he knew going there would only cause them to leave early.  Better to let them have their fun.  They would do well without him.

 

He learned later from Kotomi that the club hadn't met.  She had gone, only to find the three new girls and no one else.  He wondered how long it would take them to catch on that he wasn't going to go back to the club.

 

The day passed with tense silence to the next.

 

\----0----

 

"Today," Okazaki said out loud as he looked out his bedroom window at the city he had come to love.  "The day that everything began to change."  He sighed deeply.  It was not the city's day to die, but the actions he would take that day would make its destruction inevitable.

 

It was time.  In a short few hours, he would have to start fighting his own past.  The calm would soon give way to the storm.

 

At once, he felt both tired to the soul and excited.  Tired, because he knew he couldn't afford to make a mistake, and because it would be an end to being able to participate in the normal student life.  Excited, because it would be the first challenging fight he'd have since he'd augmented himself again.

 

It was largely a symbolic fight.  A few drones more or less for either himself or his past self would be meaningless to both of them.  But it was still the fight that heralded the beginning of the end.

 

"Things went to hell after that point...  Couldn't fight relatively cleanly knowing what was on the other side of the ocean."  He tapped his foot in agitation.  It felt like he was missing something important.  He wished he knew what.  Every unit was in place.  He could see the planes his past self was taking on radar.  Had seen his past self get on the jets.

 

There wasn't anything he was missing, even after he checked the fiftieth time.  He shrugged it off and attributed it to a simple case of nerves.  After all, it wasn't every day one started a war with their past self that would result in the deaths of billions.  _'Only on Tuesdays.  Good day for starting a war.'_

 

He snorted at the thought.  "Never did get over my tendency toward dark humour, either."  He turned away from the window and got dressed.

 

 _'Last time to wear this uniform, too.  Last time to go to school like a normal kid.  Last time to...'_   He shook his head.  "So much for good times," he said with a sigh.  "It was fun, wasn't it?  Living like a normal person, for a time?"  He looked down at his hands.

 

 _'And this, too, shall pass,_ ' he reflected _.  'Everything must come to an end sometime.'_   He looked forward again with a determined set to his eyes.  _'No turning back now.  Time to do what must be done.'_

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki walked to school with a determined stride, and arrived without incident.  He tracked his past self as he left planes at various airports.  He sat down in his seat as one of his past self's drones rented a car.  He watched in his mind's eye as his past self's rental car neared Hikarizaka.  He pretended to sleep as his past self parked the rental car near the sakura lined path to the high school.

 

He idly decided to just call his past self 'Past'.  It seemed appropriate.

 

He raised his head to look out the window.  In the same place where he had intercepted Yonai, just a few weeks before, came Past.

 

Past strode onto the school grounds with a stiff yet confident swagger.  Alert, greenish blue eyes that seemed stuck in a perpetual glare scanned this way and that warily, an odd complement to the derisive sneer on his face.  A hand reached up to stroke his bushy brown beard contemplatively, before reaching down to adjust the clothing on his plus sized torso.

 

Okazaki remembered the reason for every detail.  The stiffness was because of all the crystalline armour that lay just below the skin of the drone.  The oversized gut held within a fusion micro-reactor, which shown brilliantly on his thermal vision, even through obscuring armour and heat shielding.  The alertness was because he knew he was in enemy territory.

 

The derisive sneer and swagger, of course, were because he had always been a cocky bastard, confident he could take whatever his foes could dish out, and not expecting too much different here.

 

Okazaki had to admit that, if nothing else, he was going to enjoy proving him wrong about that.  Past was now in _his_ territory.  He would protect it, memories told him that much.  He would also protect the people living in it.  That was just determination on his part, but he aimed to see it become truth.  He wouldn't see his friends die, not again.

 

Past walked past the club building, looking, Okazaki knew, for the heat of an active reactor, and not finding one.  Okazaki had no reactor; just the high capacity batteries.  Although Past had similar batteries, he had fewer, and for him they were backup power.  His design methodology at the time had been to field units that didn't require an extensive logistics train that could be cut.

 

Combined with even his infantry units being tough enough to only be reliably taken out with anti-tank weaponry, not needing logistical support had allowed his units to run roughshod over traditional armies as he cut their supply lines to ribbons.  The reactor was also a weakness though.  Heat seeking missiles were drawn to them, which was an effective, if pricy way to take out his infantry.

 

And hitting the reactor chamber hard enough would crack it, letting air in.  Safety was the price for portable fusion.  The reaction required a localized point where temperature reached well into the millions of degrees.  When air hit that, in such a small unit, the results were... explosive.  No more than a standard stick of dynamite, but when it happened inside a human-sized body, the results weren't pretty.

 

Okazaki intended to do more than just crack that reactor.  He stood up, ignoring the protest from the teacher.  It was now or never.

 

"...E-Everyone, get away from the windows!" exclaimed Fujibayashi.

 

Time slowed down as he artificially boosted his reaction times and turned toward the window.  A short hop sent him crashing through it.  Shards of glass bit into his skin.  A puff of compressed air sent him down at the proper angle.  He could hear the sound of shattering glass behind him.

 

Past looked up at the sound of breaking glass in surprise.  Too late, Past's main weapon popped out from his back.  The laser cannon was designed to burn through the top armour of a main battle tank, and less reliably, through the rear armour.

 

Okazaki's hand landed on the barrel of the weapon as it fired.  Though his ring finger was reinforced, it still didn't come anywhere close to tank armour.  The laser burned through almost instantly.  It also boiled a swath of flesh off Okazaki's face.  The beam continued on from there.

 

The laser cannon was not meant to stand up to 320 kilograms of cyborg landing on its barrel.  It was ripped free of its mounting, and tossed to the side.  Out of the corner of his eye, he could see it begin to burn, a thermite self-destruct charge having gone off within.

 

The rest of Okazaki's body contacted Past's shortly afterward.  The impact of the collision was like having a light car dropped on him from a third of the height.  Concrete cracked under his heels, and he was forced into a crouch.

 

Okazaki's feet finally touched ground.  He mirrored Past's crouched stance.

 

In eerie synchronization, they leapt.  Okazaki forward, Past backward.

 

Past's left shoulder exploded upward with a pneumatic hiss.  A special hooked machete held within his shoulder ripped through his clothes.  He reached for it with his right hand.

 

Okazaki made the quickest of jabs to the handle of the machete.  It flipped just out of Past's reach.

 

Past used the hand he had been reaching to it with to send a backhanded blow toward Okazaki.

 

Okazaki tilted his head back to avoid the hit.  It still clipped him in the chin with enough force to give his jaw an unnatural bend to the left.  His cheeks exploded as small bullets were fired from hidden barrels inside his head.

 

The bullets stitched an angry red line across Past's eyes, digging gouges into the plexiglas corneas and obscuring his vision.

 

Click-click-click.

 

The small ammunition supply ran dry to Okazaki's cheek mounted guns.

 

The machete bounced off of Past's shoulder.  The tip of it nicked his skin as it bounced.

 

Past reared his left fist back for a punch, doing his best to judge Okazaki's position without being able to see more than a blurred outline.

 

Okazaki jabbed again.  This time not with the intent of knocking away the machete.  The handle hit Okazaki's right palm.

 

Past's left hand darted out with a straight punch.

 

Okazaki let the momentum of the punch tilt his right side backward.

 

They finally reunited fully with the ground near the gate of the school.  They leapt again.

 

Past tried to get distance from Okazaki.

 

Okazaki scythed down with Past's blade while bringing his leg up for a kick.  The triangular wedge on the tip of the machete came down on Past where the neck and collarbone of an ordinary human would meet.

 

Past punched at the side of the machete while Okazaki kicked past self in the chest.  Both hits landed at almost the same time.

 

But Past's drone was somewhat slower and less agile than Okazaki's more refined model.  The kick ripped the machete backward, the tip catching slightly on frontal armour plate.  The plate cracked where Okazaki kicked.

 

The machete itself was made of the same X-ray transparent crystal as his armour.  It shattered under Past's blow.  But it had served Okazaki's purpose.  He tossed the handle to the side.

 

Past flew through the concrete wall beside the school gate.  He skidded for a moment before turning the momentum into a roll.

 

Okazaki fell forward into a bracing position.

 

Past rotated onto his feet and snarled at Okazaki.

 

Okazaki's lower torso exploded outward.  Five barrels, each holding a .50 BMG round, oriented themselves toward Past.  Almost as one, all five rounds fired.  The recoil from the heavy rounds made his front leg lift off the ground slightly, in spite of his 320 KG bulk.

 

The first round hit the crack in the armour, widening the gap but not quite able to penetrate the plate when hitting away from the fracture plane.

 

The second round widened the gap further, shearing off the jacket of the bullet.  The bullet core slammed against the reactor housing with reduced energy.  This put a series of cracks in the housing.

 

The third round sailed through unimpeded until it met the reactor housing.  It smashed through, narrowly missed the center of the reaction, and impacted the opposite side of the reactor from the inside.

 

The fourth round penetrated all the way through.  It left a gaping hole in Past's back as the crystalline armour shattered, not designed to take force from the inside.

 

The fifth round sailed through Past to parts unknown.

 

Past exploded.  His legs and lower torso immediately began to burn as thermite charges ignited.  The rest of him tumbled through the air and landed a couple meters behind the burning remains of his lower body.  He shook his head, momentarily stunned by the damage to his person.

 

A moment was all Okazaki needed.  He turned so that his shoulder pointed toward Past's mangled form.  He raised his arm straight out, pointed toward the drone's head.  There was a click, as mechanisms locked in place at the elbow and shoulder.

 

Past snarled as he regained his bearings.  Even being rendered to just a torso and arms didn't put him out of the fight.  He pushed himself up to stand on his hands.

 

Okazaki's hand flipped downward, revealing the end of a laser cannon.

 

One searing moment, and Past's drone began to burn, thermite charges detonating at the loss of a signal from his brain.  It was a measure to keep his technology from being reverse engineered; thermite rendered his remains into pools of molten metal, crystal, and carbon ash.

 

Okazaki smirked as his hand returned to its normal position.  He felt exhilarated for the first time in years, finally able to fight without limiting himself.  Fighting without pulling punches, each blow meant to kill, if possible.  It was like meeting an old friend, like a warm meal after ages of starvation, like returning home after being away for years.  Even if it hadn't lasted long, he still felt contentment at finally being able to let loose after so long.

 

He loved it.

 

He hated it.

 

Why did it have to be that he only felt this way, like he was complete, when he was fighting to the death like this?  It wasn't fair.

 

He sighed after a few moments, and surveyed the damage.  A big gaping hole in concrete wall near the school gate led to a long line of torn ground where Past had skidded.  At the end of the line was a small crater, the edges of which burned from the thermite still alight, a funeral pyre for Past's drone.  Three floors under the broken classroom window was another burning pile of thermite; all that remained of Past’s laser cannon.

 

Just over eight seconds from start to finish.  Eight seconds to start a war that would kill billions.

 

Similar results trickled in from the other places where Past had arrived.  The same scene, played out in radically different ways.  This was the only urban location he had visited.  Everywhere else had been out of the way, in the middle of nowhere.  He used heavier weapons in those other locations, in accordance with his memory.

 

He looked around.  There was something missing.  He blinked as he came to a realization. _'Where is everyone?'_ He looked at the nearest building, and turned on heat vision.  He could see people huddling under the window line, apparently at the direction of the teacher.  _'Ah.  Duh.  School shooting security.'_   He shook his head at his own stupidity and alliteration before turning to the building he had leapt from.

 

With a shrug, he activated optical camouflage and walked toward the building and started to clamber up the side.  It no longer hid him perfectly; the damage he had taken destroyed the organic light emitting diodes that made up his stealth system where he'd been hit.

 

He flipped himself expertly into the room, to find it mostly empty.  The only other person in the room was-

 

He stared, transfixed by the figure.

 

It was Fujibayashi.  And she was dead.

 

\----0----

 

End Act Two

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A Note From The Author:**

 

So... that happened.  I have to say, it’s been interesting holding onto this little twist for so long.  I’ve actually foreshadowed it a bit....  Well, specifically her, I should say.  I mean, I’ve been pretty heavy with the foreshadowing that something was going to happen, but not specifically what.  For that, I laid some rather subtle foreshadowing.  Points to anyone whom finds it.  :P

 

But do me a favour, and PM your guesses?  In fact, if you could do me a big favour and not review spoil that, I would be most appreciative.  ;)

 

Anyway, I would like to thank Palaven Blues for her work beta’ing this whole thing, she’s helped quite a bit with everything.  If you’re into Mass Effect, I totally recommend reading her stories.  She’s good.


	27. Aftermath, Part 1

Act Three:  War

 

In real life, lasers do not have the same effects as they do in fiction.  Wounds incurred from them are not clean or cauterized.  While they can cut metal easily enough, they do this through thermal interaction.  In anything with any sort of water content at all, this results in flash steam explosions at the point where the laser hits.  The human body, being mostly water, is not exempt from this.  The effect is surprisingly similar to being shot.

 

As Okazaki looked at what remained of Fujibayashi, he was struck once again by this fact.

 

She had been pretty once.  He wasn't blind to this.  That had been when she was whole.  The only way he knew for sure that it was her was the lock of hair, blown clear to his desk.  A shortish lock of violet hair, with a white ribbon tied around it, that used to grace the left side of her face.  He looked at the scene numbly, and tried to piece together what had occurred.

 

A combat laser was a powerful weapon; even the one that Past had, which was relatively low strength.  Though the damage was instantly fatal, and more than a little messy, it still didn't quite match up with what would be expected.  That said, there was a copious amount of splatter involved.  He took in the angles of the spray, which told him where the event had occurred.  He also remembered the angle the laser had fired from.

 

Inconsistency.  Neither she nor the laser had ever been in the same place, in spite of what he was seeing.  Or at least, under normal circumstances, that should have been the case.  Impossibly, for the laser to have struck Fujibayashi as it had, it would have needed to bend at an almost forty five degree angle; something lasers are generally not known to do.

 

He looked down at the floor below where the laser would have had to have bent.  A pool of something that looked like water puddled directly below, amid shards of broken glass.  One shard was partially embedded in the pool.  Okazaki realized that it not only was embedded, but had melted into the puddle slightly.  He glanced at the ceiling, where a dark line of carbonized particle board made a line almost to the other side of the room.

 

He knew what had happened.  The laser beam was at the wrong angle to hit anyone when it fired.  But the glass was broken.  Ordinarily this would still not be an issue.  But there were a lot of broken shards.  The force of the compressed air had hit the windows like a sledgehammer.

 

One shard had been enough to redirect the laser beam just the tiniest bit.  Another a little bit more.  And another.  And another.  The laser melted them each in turn, but not before the beam was reflected to shine on Fujibayashi's head.

 

The rational part of him was bothered by that.  The odds of something like that happening were vanishingly remote.  For each shard of glass to be oriented just right to reflect the beam....  It was possible for such a thing to happen, but that didn't mean the odds weren't against it.  Either way, he knew it wouldn't have happened if he hadn't fought.  He also knew it was far too late to do anything about it now.

 

Movement.  His eyes turned with terrible slowness to the door, where a figure stood.

 

Fujibayashi Kyou, once twin sister to Fujibayashi Ryou, if only in basic appearance, stood staring at the scene without expression.  He watched her eyes be drawn first to what remained of Fujibayashi, slumped over in her seat.  Then to the lock of hair on Okazaki's desk.  Finally, her eyes locked onto Okazaki's face.

 

He opened his mouth to say something.  Anything.  He searched for the right words, but found that for all his experiences, there was nothing he could say.

 

Slowly, painfully slowly, her eyes widened.  Her lip quivered as she swallowed, and her hands clenched and unclenched repeatedly.  Finally she dropped to her knees, staring blankly at Okazaki.

 

He had seen the expression before, more times than he cared to recall.  It was the inevitable result of warfare in an urban location.  Some circles used the clinical term 'collateral damage' for it.  Each time he saw the survivors was disturbing.  Never before had he seen it on a good friend's face, though.  An uncomfortable numbness crawled across his shoulders, portends of the inevitable shards of glass that he knew would tear at his heart for years to come.

 

The first shard pierced him when she raised her face to the heavens and screamed.  He found himself short of breath, in spite of his augments.  He stepped back.  Then he took another step back.  The urge to run took hold, and he heeded it.  He turned and leapt out the window, much as he had done earlier.

 

He fled the scene, eyes wide and bile rising in his throat.  Kyou's face lingered in his mind though he could no longer see it.  He cursed his memory; that image would taunt him forever, he knew.  The sight of her breaking.  And he couldn't blame anyone but himself.

 

\----0----

 

The damaged fragment of Okazaki arrived at his house, stepping around a fragment of himself that was conveniently holding the door open and looking with a grim frown in the direction of the school.

 

There would be an investigation, he knew.  He hoped that his habit of leaving the school would come into play there, but he didn't view it as particularly likely.  Would there be an attempt to arrest him?  Perhaps.  Would such an attempt work?  Unlikely.  He hoped it didn't come to gunplay; he had taken too many innocent lives.

 

 _'And one more today,'_ he reflected bitterly.  _'Gods damn it all.  Why did it have to be like this?'_

 

He walked toward the elevator in his room.  As it descended, he finally let the optical camouflage drop.  He braced his hand against the wall of the elevator and sighed raggedly.  It had all gone so wrong, so fast....

 

Ushio's words suddenly came back to him.  "You will suffer.  Your friends will suffer.  Kotomi will suffer."

 

 _'Oh by the dark gods.  Kotomi.'_  He slammed his head into the elevator wall with a grimace _.  'How in the seven hells am I going to break this to her?'_

 

When the elevator reached the bottom floor, he laid down on the waiting cargo hauler's flat bed.  The fragment would be disassembled, almost ritualistically.  It was the only atonement he could offer, in a time where he would need his entire hivemind working to halt his past self.

 

He sent an unaugmented fragment of himself back up the elevator.  He knew what would come next; police.

 

\----0----

 

It was an hour later when the police showed up at Okazaki's house, as he had expected.  He noted that the police officer that greeted him was one of the same officers that had questioned him about Naoyuki's death.

 

"Okazaki Tomoya?" asked the officer.

 

"That's right," Okazaki said with a yawn.

 

"We have eye witness reports saying that you were at Hikarizaka Private High School earlier today."

 

"Yeah, I left earlier, what about it?"

 

"There has been a shooting there."

 

"...I see.  Was anyone hurt?"

 

"That's what we need to discuss.  Would you come with us, please?"

 

"Why can't we discuss it here?  I can get us some tea and-"

 

"Please sir, just come with us.  I don't want to have to arrest you."

 

"...I see."  Okazaki sighed.  He had already run the scenario through his heads.

 

Telling Tomoyo his story had been a mistake, even if she deserved to know.  It directly connected him to what his past self was about to do.  No matter what happened, that would be sufficient reason for an investigation of his home.  If nothing else, that would unveil his desk for what it was; a pneumatic tube terminal.  Efficient for small item transportation.  Also damning evidence that all was not as it seemed.

 

He had two options.  Either resist arrest, or go with them.  Resisting arrest would doubtless escalate quickly; almost certainly, it would require military intervention before all was said and done.  And military intervention meant explosions.  Which would end poorly if he wasn't able to restore his house before the city was nuked.

 

He remembered seeing his house destroyed by the nuclear initiation.  Everything had still been more or less in the proper place, however.  If the military destroyed it, and he wasn't able to fix it before the nuke went off...  He would have a paradox on his hands.

 

On the other hand, going with them presented a number of related problems.  There would be an investigation.  Investigation meant probable discovery of his base.  Discovery led to military intervention, led to explosions, led to paradox.  However, it also might delay any such investigation, for a short time at least.  Enough time to come up with a better solution, perhaps.

 

The officer looked at Okazaki expectantly.

 

"Alright, officer," Okazaki said.  "I'll go with you."

 

"Thank you," the officer said.  "Please come with me."

 

Okazaki let himself be led to the police car.  He expected to be questioned, and ultimately imprisoned when he said nothing in his own defense.  Too many students were eye witnesses to the fact that he was involved.

 

He wasn't disappointed.

 

\----0----

 

It was another fragment of Okazaki that arrived in Kotomi's closet elevator, brow furrowed and a grim frown on his face a few hours later.  He did not look forward to delivering his news.  He was afraid, too.  Afraid to see her face when he told her.  Afraid to hear her words.  Afraid to hear her cry.  He very much wished to ride the elevator back down, and simply pretend the world outside of defeating his past self didn't exist.

 

He stepped out of the elevator.  He had no use for cowardice.  He'd already succumbed to it once that day.  No more.

 

He turned on thermal vision.  She was in the living room, he could see, facing her television.  As he walked to the room, he found that each step got harder to take, as if he was trudging through the drying blood of his victims.  A quick diagnostic check told him that everything still functioned properly; it was entirely in his mind.  He stopped himself for a moment and took a deep breath before continuing.  It didn't get easier.

 

Kotomi sat on her couch, facing the television.  As he walked, he could hear the audio.

 

"A suspect has been arrested," said a female reporter the television as he entered the room.  "We hope to get more details as the case unfolds.  Back to you."

 

"Thank you," said a male announcer at a desk.  "We send our sincerest respects to the families of the victims.  Now, to our foreign correspondent, Fujiwara Rokuro on developing reports in the United States."

 

"Not just in the United States," said another male reporter.  "All over the greater American continent there have been reports..."  He lifted a hand to his ear.  "Correction.  I am receiving reports from our source in England regarding-"

 

Kotomi hit the power button on her remote and turned to Okazaki.

 

Okazaki shuddered.  He couldn't place just what it was exactly, but her eyes....  It was like staring into an empty vessel.  He knew that she was aware of Fujibayashi's death.  He opened his mouth to speak.

 

"Ryou chan is dead," she said, without a trace of emotion.

 

He shuddered.  It was as if something inside of her had just... died _.  'Small wonder; her best friend, whom she likes... liked, has, in effect, killed one of her very few other friends.'_

 

"...Yes," he said after a long moment.

 

"Tell me more about your mind to machine interface."

 

He blinked.  _'That's it?  Ryou's dead, and that's what she says?'_   "...You....  Don't you think we should-"

 

"Please."

 

"I....  Alright...."  He couldn't keep from shuddering again, as he explained more about the interface to her.

 

\----0----

 

It took Okazaki longer than he expected to come up with an adequate plan about how to deal with the investigation.  It was simple.  Something he had done thousands of times before.  He could have a unit there literally anytime he needed.

 

The downside?  He would have to eat the minds of the investigators.

 

Ideally before they could start investigating, but he could do it while they investigated in a pinch.  All it would cost would be some of the hard won shreds of his humanity he had regained.  He hadn't eaten a mind since he had been reborn.  Yet, in the face of causing a paradox, there was no contest.  His humanity, or the universe, pick one to get rid of.

 

_'Ushio was right.  I truly am damned now.'_

 

He began to set his plans in motion.

 

\----0----

 

The investigation happened too quickly for Okazaki to stop.  However, he was able to intercept the investigators in his house, one at a time.  His optical camouflage equipped retrieval fragments made the process all too simple.  One investigator was nabbed in his room, then tasked to bring the other investigator.  It was damningly easy.

 

The only solace he could take was that the timeline was saved, for the moment at least.  Once again however, he had taken a step on a slippery slope.  He hoped that maintaining the timeline didn't require such intervention again.

 

It was from the investigators that Okazaki learned news that Fujibayashi wasn't the only fatality.  There was one other; a person who had been out of school at the time, apparently skipping.  A young man, by the name of Sakagami Takafumi.  Death had been instantaneous; the bullet he knew he had fired during his fight with Past hit him in the head.  With a bullet that big, there was no hope of revival.

 

Metaphorical teeth ground in response to the information _.  'What the shit?  Is this some sort of Deus Angst Machina or something?'_

 

He felt numb.  Fujibayashi was dead, and Kyou would need therapy, at the very least.  Now he had learned that Tomoyo's brother was dead.  He wondered if there was another factor at work, there.  Fujibayashi's death, though improbable in the extreme, could be chalked up to happenstance.  Strange things did happen now and again, after all.

 

But Tamafuki's death, at the same time, from similar circumstances...  It made him think of the old maxim.  _'Once is happenstance, twice is coincidence, but three times is enemy action._ '  Maybe it was just coincidence.  If so though, it was one hell of a coincidence, and he wasn't quite convinced.  And if the maxim held true, as he suspected it might, he wondered when the last shoe would drop.

 

The only step remaining was trying to figure out what was causing such frightful incidents.  The list of possible suspects was tiny, though; and at the head of the list was Ushio.  He already knew she could influence behaviors easily enough.  And that she had cause to make him regret his decisions.  But could she manipulate physical objects in such a way?  That, he didn't know.  And he wasn't inclined to find out, either.

 

He had promised he wouldn't be back to her gods-forsaken realm and, inconvenient or not, he wouldn't go against his word.

 

_'Involved or not...  Ushio was right.  My friends are suffering now.  And in the end, I can only really blame myself for taking these actions in the first place.  Gods damn it all.  Why didn't I do the sane thing in my first life, and just help everyone?  I could have!  But I had to go and fight.  Fight, and lose.  Even when I won, I'd lost everything most important to me.  And now I've taken what's most important to my friends.  Oh gods...'_

 

As he thought about what other shoes may yet drop, his thoughts turned to Tomoyo.  He didn't have a clue as to where she was, which under the circumstances wasn't a good thing.  He'd been unable to keep track of her when Past was on the prowl, but now that he could operate freely again, he couldn't find her.  He'd even sent an optically camouflaged fragment to her house, and found nothing.

 

He found that fact... unsettling.


	28. Aftermath, Part 2

It was almost a week later that school started up again.  Okazaki had continued to discuss the mind to machine interface with Kotomi almost constantly while she was off.  While he could lie to himself and say that he had gotten used to her new demeanor, he knew in his heart that he would never truly be able to accept this new, dead Kotomi he had been teaching.

 

It was almost a relief when school started.  He wouldn't have to see those hollow eyes, hear that dead voice, just for a little while longer.  He knew it was wrong to want to escape that, but he found he just couldn't bring himself to outright face the emotional devastation he had wrought.

 

So when Kotomi sat down at the workbench, as she had each day the past week, he couldn't stop the words coming from his mouth.

 

"School starts back up today, Kotomi chan," he said.

 

"I know."

 

"You... aren't going?"

 

"Tell me more about the mind-to-machine interface."

 

"I will when you get back.  Please...  See your friends."

 

"Why?"

 

"...What do you mean, why?"

 

"Friends will die.  Except for you."

 

He swallowed hard, and it took him a moment to find the words to reply.  "Be that as it may.  Doesn't that make them all the more precious?"

 

"Some things are more precious because they do not last long."

 

"Oscar Wilde.  Yes, that's it exactly."

 

"Alright then."  Kotomi stood and walked out of the workshop.

 

Okazaki watched her go before looking down at their present project.  It was a brain, one that had a mind to machine interface implanted within.  It looked like any other brain, except for the occasional twinkle when light was reflected just right by microcircuitry on the surface.

 

He had the sudden urge to smash it.  The technology....  He thought it would save him, save everyone.  And maybe it could have, if someone else had used it.  For him it had brought nothing but pain.  Pain to him, pain to others.  Pain to Kotomi.  He bit his finger, hard enough to draw blood.  He sighed and licked the wounded finger, savoring the taste.

 

No amount of pain he caused himself would bring anyone back.  Nor would it ease his burden.  He had learned that lesson well.

 

\----0----

 

"Nagisa is dead."

 

The fragment of Okazaki in jail blinked at the statement Akio had greeted him with, as he sat on the other side of the plexiglas divider in the visitor's section.

 

Akio glared at him.  The man's arms quivered, as if he wished to reach through the glass and strangle Okazaki.

 

"...She's-"

 

"Dead.  My daughter was... very weak.  Between whatever you told her, and her friend dying....  It was too much.  She just...."  He brought up a hand to his face.

 

Okazaki could see tears roll out from under his hand and he grit his teeth.  Try as he might though, he couldn't feel anything anymore.  It was like when he was a child, and his grandparents died, three within the span of a month.  When the first passed away, he had sobbed.  When the second died, he cried a little.  By the third, nothing.  Something in him died with them.

 

Akio suddenly slammed his hands against the plexiglas.  "YOU KILLED HER!  YOU-"

 

Two police officers grabbed the struggling Akio by the arms and wrestled him away.  As they pulled him, Okazaki could hear Akio cursing his name.

 

The detective in charge of questioning Okazaki, an unassuming man by the name of Sato Masanori, walked to stand beside Okazaki.

 

Okazaki ignored his presence.

 

"Will you talk now?" Masanori asked.

 

Okazaki remained silent.

 

After a few seconds, Masanori sighed.  "If you keep up this silent act, we will not be able to help you.  It will bring shame to us, to the school, and to your family.  Is that really what you want?"

 

Okazaki didn't reply.

 

Masanori sighed again.  "We'll try later.  Think about it."

 

As Masanori walked away, Okazaki let his head drop.  _'At least she suffers no more,'_ he thought bitterly.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki looked at Kotomi from across the workbench where they were dissecting his brain.  It was odd to watch; there was drive there, obviously, but at the same time, it was like watching a robot.  Those eyes had, as long as he remembered, held restrained emotion at the very least.

 

Now, as he watched them flit between the microscope he had brought her and her notes, he saw nothing.  Just an abyss, where a person used to dwell.  He wanted to look away, always wanted to look away, but his eyes betrayed him each time, and he found himself staring into that abyss.

 

He turned his head to the side and looked down at the floor.  He hadn't told her about Furukawa yet.  He couldn't bring himself to.  Each time he went to open his mouth, a lump formed in his throat, and took all speech away from him.  He swallowed a few times, knowing that it was all in his head.

 

"...Kotomi chan," he finally said.

 

"Yes?"

 

"Furukawa is...."  He couldn't continue; the lump in his throat had come again.

 

Kotomi switched from her notes to the microscope.  "I know."

 

"...I see."  He watched her for any sign of a reaction.  He found himself staring into the abyss again, and finding nothing within.

 

He closed his eyes.  Two of her friends, killed by her best friend.  It had destroyed her inside, he could see it.  Where once there had been a lovely girl with a heart full of kindness and scientific curiosity, there was now just a broken machine.

 

He'd done this to her.  There wasn't anyone else to whom he could pin the blame, no one else at whom he could direct his anger.  Everything was his own fault.  He wished he had never received that letter, wished he had killed himself first.  No one would have suffered that way, except for him.  But now it was too late.

 

\----0----

 

The next visitor to Okazaki in jail was an unfamiliar man, somewhat short with blue hair and sad violet eyes that were tinged red as if he had been crying.  The expression he wore was almost neutral, but with an undercurrent that seemed painfully familiar to Okazaki.  He simply sat down in front of the visitor's window and stared at Okazaki.

 

Okazaki returned the favor with a frown and raised eyebrow.

 

"Do you know who I am?" the man asked.

 

"No."

 

"Then allow me to introduce myself.  My name is Fujibayashi Ryota."

 

"...I see."  The expression on the man's face suddenly made all too much sense.  He found himself surprised he hadn't recognized it from the start; he'd seen the expression a million times.  _'The expression of a person who is broken.'_

 

"You know why I am here?"

 

Okazaki merely nodded.

 

"Why?  Why did you do it?"  At Okazaki's silence, he continued.  "What did they do to you?  My little girls..."  A grimace tore across his face and he began to cry.

 

Okazaki watched expressionlessly.  There was nothing he could say now to change things.  Nothing he could tell him to ease his suffering.  Even telling the truth, that it had been a horrible accident, that might not even be an accident but something caused by a malevolent ghost that he had tormented into it?  _'Yeah, that'd go over well.'_

 

"My little Kyou is...  I think you killed her just as much as you killed Ryou.  She's...  It's like she's not even there anymore.  She's just... gone."

 

Okazaki looked down at his hands.  He wasn't surprised to learn that.  He just wished he felt something other than... emptiness.  Something had died within him through what had happened, too.

 

"...I can clearly see I'm wasting my time here," he said, the sudden steel in his voice surprising Okazaki.  "Thank you for your time."  He stood and walked away, leaving Okazaki to his thoughts.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki learned where Tomoyo was, about an hour after Ryota left.

 

It was almost by chance when his satellite passed overhead.  Even less likely that he noticed the silver head of hair, darting purposefully from alley to alley, building to building, making almost a bee line toward the prison.  He turned his focus to her, and realized she was laden with equipment.

 

 _'No.  Weaponry.  That's a Kalashnikov or a knockoff for sure, even odds that's explosives...'_  He mentally frowned as he noted no one running away or running toward her. _'What in the-  Doesn't anyone notice there's a heavily armed girl just waltzing through town?'_

 

He turned a fragment of his attention to the strangely oblivious bystanders, and noticed something even more unusual.  _'No one's looking at her.  When she comes out from hiding to go to an alley, they're just... looking elsewhere.  Now doesn't that seem familiar?'_

 

He reflected on his conversation with Ushio.  "Didn't you ever find it odd?" she had said.  "Small things going your way? Like, for instance, when you met Fuko. No one ever looked your way when you went out the window. Would have complicated matters if they had seen you. How lucky for you that they didn't."

 

As Tomoyo reached the area nearest his cell, he cursed Ushio's name mentally.

 

The explosion was enough to crack the wall of his prison cell.  A few fragments of masonry were sent flying.  One fragment sliced Okazaki's temple.  Alarms started going off.  He heard a frustrated, feminine growl from the other side of the wall.  A foot rammed through the weakened concrete.  Then again.  Then again.

 

The lithe form of Sakagami Tomoyo stepped through.  Her eyes, bloodshot, were fixed in a glare.  In her hands was a Chinese knockoff of the AK-104.

 

For a strange moment, he wondered where she got it from.  _'Maybe the Yakuza?'_

 

She brought the weapon up toward Okazaki.

 

He dodged sideways.

 

She fired.  The noise was deafening.

 

He felt a rush of wind past his abdomen.

 

She kept firing, the recoil driving the barrel of her weapon up.

 

He chose that moment to launch himself at her.  But his form was mostly human.  It had to be, to get through any medical checks he would be given.

 

She kicked him.

 

Unaugmented eyes didn't even see the kick.  He was driven into the cell wall.  He watched as she lifted her weapon toward him again.

 

She staggered, and he could see streams of red fly from her side.

 

He turned to the bars of his cell to see an officer.  His handgun was out, and he was firing.  He turned toward Tomoyo again.

 

The recoil of the officer’s weapon had forced his aim upward.  One bullet put Tomoyo out of her misery for good.  Another was just an insult.  Her body collapsed sideways, away from the officer.

 

Okazaki helplessly watched it play out, eyes wide.  He reached out toward her for a moment, then pulled back his hands as he realized how foolish it was.  _'Gods damn it all.  Tomoyo.  To come to such an end...'_   He brought his hands up to his face.

 

He heard the cell door open.  He offered no resistance to the officers as they pulled his arms up and examined him.  His eyes focused on Tomoyo.

 

"He's alright," said one of the officers.  "Just a scrape on his head."

 

"Lucky," replied another.

 

"My friend just died," Okazaki said.  "After trying to kill me.  I'm not sure that's luck."  He heard one of the officers sigh.

 

"Kid, after what you did, I'm not sure you have any right to complain."

 

Okazaki was silent at that.  He remained silent as they treated his wound, and as they tried to question him about her.  There was nothing to say.

 

\----0----

 

Meanwhile, the fragment of Okazaki at Kotomi's house watched silently as Kotomi adjusted the view of her microscope once again.  He stood up.  Kotomi never looked his way.

 

"...I'll be right back," he said.

 

Silence.

 

He sighed and stepped into the hallway, then leaned against the wall.  Nothing.  He felt nothing.  He just watched Tomoyo die before his eyes, because of his own actions, and he felt nothing.  Just tired, weak, and a little sick, despite not having a true stomach anymore.

 

The other shoe had dropped.  There was no doubt in his mind that something was stacking the odds against him.  Almost certainly, it was Ushio running things into the ground for him.  It made sense.  Tomoyo was relatively stable, all things considered.  But she had a core that was capable of fury and violence.

 

Who else did he know that could take a spark of emotion and turn it into a raging inferno?  Who else did he know that could ensure someone's back was turned while she walked the streets armed well enough to take on a third world country, in a nation where one couldn't just go and buy a gun?

 

Ushio.  It had to be Ushio.  He clenched his fist in fury.  _'That bitch!  I'm going to kill-  ...Er.'_   He frowned at the thought of trying to kill someone who was already dead.

 

He pinched the bridge of his nose.  Either way, he knew he needed to tell Kotomi, at least about Tomoyo's passing.  He didn't want to.  He'd done too much to her already, and it would only be another knife in her back.

 

He rubbed his eyes, frustrated.  He was running from the issue, putting it off.  He turned and entered the workshop again.

 

"Kotomi chan," he called out softly.

 

She looked at him for a moment, then pointed at her microscope.  "...Is this the connection the mind-to-machine interface makes with the neuron?"

 

"...Do you remember Sakagami san?"

 

"She's dead too, isn't she?"  Her expression didn't change at all.

 

He grit his teeth.  "I....  Yes."

 

She turned away from him for a moment, then back to him, face unchanged.  "Is this the connection the mind-to-machine interface makes with the neuron?"

 

He looked at her blankly, and then looked down at the ground.  He shook his head and stepped to the microscope.  "Let me....  Let me take a look.  ...Yes, that's... that's it."

 

She nodded, and he stepped out of the way so she could look into the microscope.  As he watched her, he felt himself die inside, just a little more.

 

\----0----

 

Time passed.  Kotomi stopped going to class or watching the news.

 

Okazaki's feelings on this were mixed.  On the one hand, he almost couldn't take watching her day after day, that unchanging, broken expression always on his face tore at his soul.  On the other hand, she wasn't watching the news, and wasn't seeing how things were getting progressively worse.

 

He kept tabs on the news, watching as the world became more and more desperate in the face of Past's army.  It hadn't been the steamrolling he had envisioned back then; the world's armies had made him pay for his advances.  But it hadn't been enough.  Loss ratios had been skewed in his favor already, and he could simply make more of himself faster than new soldiers could be recruited and trained.

 

Even with reinforcements from Asia, in particular from a reluctant China, there had been no way to keep up with him.  All that could be done was to slow him down, just a bit.  And slow him they had.

 

At the outset, ground attack aircraft had been an issue.  Even though he almost always managed to shoot down the aircraft, it also usually managed to get missiles off.  Unless a large group was attacked, he didn't have enough time to recharge his laser's capacitors before the missiles had destroyed a unit or two.

 

Sometimes the pilot of the aircraft would survive, but it was infrequent.  He had eaten the minds of those that did.  He had needed their experience; he had no natural aptitude at all for flying an aircraft.  It wasn't until after he had eaten their minds that he started fielding air units of his own, which he had held back until that point.

 

Air superiority had still been tricky to achieve.  His aircraft weren't that much more durable than conventional aircraft, although they were more maneuverable.  Even so, his combat lasers had meant such fights were usually a draw.  Air forces started running out of trained pilots soon enough, and stopped bothering with manned flights.

 

Unmanned air and ground vehicles had caused him problems, for a time.  They were, in ways, closer to him than the soldiers he had fought; able to take more abuse, able to die without much consequence, able to retain experience through their remote pilots.  They had given him problems, for a time.

 

He had ultimately resorted to bombing the factories that produced them.  Then, for good measure, he had tracked down the operators and killed them.  Civilian casualties of such tactics were acceptable, barely.  It was a ruthless strategy, but effective.

 

The armies of the world had kept this up for nearly nine months before they started to break.  Nations with small militaries were the first, simply left with no military to field.  China and other Asian nations stopped sending reinforcements, recognizing the futility of it and hoping to consolidate their own defenses.

 

The United States held out the longest, in spite of being the prime focus of his assault in many ways.  But even a military machine such as theirs had to give, sooner or later.  When their backs were against the wall, they could be counted to do anything to achieve victory.

 

Even using nuclear weapons on their own soil.

 

Okazaki watched numbly as one of the darkest moments of his past life began to unfold, starting with what was left of the armored divisions of the United States Army bearing down on Past’s bases.  In his mind, he began to remember how it had played out.

 

The armed forces of the United States were a vast, powerful entity at one time.  And even near the end of Past’s campaign, it was still a force to be reckoned with, in spite of the continued savaging he had subjected it to.  That fact was easy to see as he had watched the armored columns that were moving toward Past’s bases.

He hadn't been sure how they had scraped that many vehicles together.  More curious had been how they were keeping the vehicles fuelled, as he had been slicing supply lines to ribbons practically since day one.  But if there was one military that could do it, it was that of the United States.  At the time, he had filed it away as a mystery to solve after the immediate threat was dealt with.

Even as he watched from an outside perspective, he was still unable to determine how they had done it.  His best guess was abnormally well equipped sleeper cells; hidden military units that lay dormant until given the opportunity to engage in guerilla warfare.  However they had pulled it off, they had been very careful to avoid being spotted by satellite.  He would have seen them otherwise.

Past sent out his own armored vehicles.  Like all of his units, they used lasers rather than traditional cannon.  Lasers of sufficient strength to quickly burn through the front armor of a tank, particularly tanks like the M1 Abrams Past now faced, weren't yet practical, even as tank armaments.  However, they burnt through tank cannon barrels and treads just fine.

 

Okazaki remembered the thoughts that had been running through his mind as Past’s vehicles moved to intercept the American units.

_It was a last-ditch effort, he realized, to at least weaken him.  He suspected that ‘the mystery to the east’ was involved somehow, but there was nothing to do about it if so.  Destroying this last remnant of the American military would let him breathe somewhat easier either way.  Still, to turn back that last-ditch assault, he realized it would take most of his forces stationed at his bases._

_That worried him somewhat.  It would introduce a measure of vulnerability to his bases; in a pinch each laser equipped unit could act as an anti-missile or anti-aircraft battery, and having them away from his bases would be a drastic reduction in defensive assets.  He would have worried more, except for the stationary anti-missile defense lasers; they were equally effective against aircraft, and horrifyingly effective against infantry._

_The possibility of facing nuclear weapons was an issue, but that's what the anti-missile defense lasers had been for.  And why his bases had been almost universally buried 5 kilometers or more below the ground.  Even a direct strike would have been survivable at that depth.  And, as he had loudly proclaimed to world and military leaders, retaliation using his own captured stockpile of nuclear weapons was but a thought away._

It took Past’s forces an hour meet the American remnants.  As the first shots were fired, Okazaki’s satellites saw the obvious plumes of rocket launches, from all around the continent.  Nuclear launches, hundreds, thousands of them, from every nuclear silo in the country that Past hadn’t managed to subvert.

 

_He had to admit he was impressed, and even somewhat worried; with that many missiles, he had known that it was likely that one or two might actually slip through his defense net.  A thought had sent some of his own missiles toward the launch sites.  He was reasonably sure the Americans had nothing left that could stop his missiles, particularly once he had upgraded their capabilities.  All that he had thought remained was to deal with the nuclear weapons racing toward him._

Okazaki realized, as he watched the missiles slowly trail their way across the landscape, that there wouldn’t really have been a problem if it had just been a single warhead per missile.  Many of the missiles that Past had acquired had been old style, single warhead models, and in his arrogance he had assumed that there probably weren’t many MIRVs around.

 

Multiple Independently targetable Reentry Vehicles, MIRV for short, were essentially what they sounded like; several nuclear warheads which could be used to strike multiple targets or, with the right setup, a single well defended target.  The system also included a large number of countermeasures to interfere with anti-missile defenses.

 

They had been banned under the START II treaty during the cold war, but Past was paranoid enough to assume that there had been a fair number stowed away, and planned his missile defenses to account for the possibility of having a few MIRVs thrown at them.

 

Somehow, and Okazaki still wasn’t sure how, the Americans had upgraded every single missile with MIRVs.  This fell well outside the purview of what Past had expected.

_The curvature of the earth proved to be a superb shield for the nuclear weapons, at least for a time.  But his lasers made short work of them when they passed above the horizon.  The first inbound missiles were destroyed.  The remaining came closer.  Another few destroyed.  Shocked surprise.  The missiles split up.  More were destroyed.  The remaining came closer still.  A frantic last firing.  Only a few remained.  But there was no more time._

_New suns dotted the land._

 

Okazaki felt his mental network be disrupted briefly by electromagnetic pulses jamming the radio frequencies that gave him his hivemind capabilities.  As the pulse faded, so too did the interference.

 

It had been worse for Past, however.

 

_The sheer devastation a nuclear weapon is capable of causing isn't able to be easily overstated.  In a searing instant, his base defense lasers had been destroyed.  It was as if someone had tied his arms and legs up.  Detection equipment was smashed.  It was like being stabbed in the eyes.  For a few confused moments, he lost overall connection with his other brains.  Equivalent to a temporary lobotomy.  Confused, blind, and helpless._

_The moment passed.  Connections were restored.  Five kilometers of rock proved to be a viable defense against airburst nukes.  In one of the assaulted bases, he reassured his few remaining friends that he had the situation under control._

_It had been a fluke when he caught it by satellite.  He recognized it for what it was, and realized he was in deep trouble.  Five kilometers of rock was excellent for defending against nukes.  But that was only provided that the nuke didn't bore down into the rock, first._

_The inbound bunker busting missile would do just that.  And if there was one, he realized, there were probably hundreds.  He began desperately scanning for them with his satellites._

Okazaki knew where to look, and was able to spot the missiles almost immediately.  For a split second, he considered sending the data to his past self, and in so doing, save his past friends.

 

Fujibayashi’s body came to mind.  So too did Tomoyo’s.  Naoyuki hanging from the ceiling.  The look on Kyou’s face, as she saw her sister.  Akio slamming his fist on a security window.  Ryota’s miserable expression.  Kotomi’s dead eyes.

 

He could not change his course, not now.  Far too much had been sacrificed, even if unintentionally, to turn back.  He wouldn’t, couldn’t let their sacrifices be in vain.  And that was to say nothing of the possibility that the universe would just up and collapse on itself if he caused a paradox.  He dared not risk it.

 

He watched on as Past’s forces disengaged from the American remnants immediately, thoughts of wiping them out put out of Past’s mind for the moment.  Although they weren't equipped with anti-missile defense lasers, they were still better than nothing.  Throttles were pushed beyond safe maximums.  Limiters were disengaged.  Past’s forces returned to their bases, and destroyed their own drive trains trying to do it in time.  But it had been too late.

_He had found many of the missiles, and had been able to shoot down most of those found.  But not all.  Bunker busting missiles had dug deeply into the stone above a number of his bases; including the one he had insisted his few friends stay at, for the sake of safety._

_Only a few of his forms had survived millions of tons of rock crushing his bases like eggs, mostly due to luck.  At the base where his friends had been, they dug frantically for survivors._

_He found his friends.  A quick DNA analysis had told him for sure, no identifying features remaining._

Okazaki’s memory was fuzzy from that point on.  His implants had dutifully recorded the primal, furious screaming he now heard once again, recorded his launching of his entire nuclear stockpile at everyone and everything, had dutifully recorded his units firing on anything and anyone within range, and frequently each other.

 

Even as he watched the scenario play out once more, it still felt unreal.  As though he had been someone else for a time, watching from behind a foggy veil as he sealed the fate of much of humanity.

 

In his rage, Past struck out at _everyone_.  And everyone struck back.  Nuclear initiations cleansed the greater American continent, even as they reaped their deadly harvest on everyone else.  Although many missiles were shot down in the process, many still got through.

 

Okazaki fared the best, knowing when and where the missiles would be.  Japan mostly remained unscathed, as did a good chunk of South Korea.  Much of the rest of the world was not so lucky.

 

It wasn’t until nearly twelve hours later that Past finally stopped screaming and descended into numb silence.  As those who remained alive began to set about the task of figuring who was even left, Okazaki took a moment to reflect on his feelings immediately after his revenge.

_When he had finally came to his senses, hours had passed, and what few remaining satellites not ruined by electromagnetic pulses told him that the greater American continent was dead.  Firestorms swept the entire continent.  He could also see plumes of smoke and fire above many major cities and military bases around the world.  A quick check confirmed that he no longer possessed any nuclear missiles.  Numbly, he had checked his internal hard drives for answers._

_Screaming.  Primal, furious screaming.  For a few hours, a single emotion had spanned the entire western hemisphere; blind, incalculable rage; a raw fury capable of killing billions with searing light and heat._

_He had his retaliation.  In the most horrifying way he could possibly conceive.  He had suddenly wished he could be ill; somehow purge nonexistent stomachs of their contents, as they so impossibly demanded._

 

\----0----

 

With a sigh, Okazaki interrupted Past's horrified realization by mounting his assault.  There was nothing left but to see things through.

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A Note From The Author:**

 

Well.  That escalated quickly.

 

Anyway, with that, I’m going to take a short hiatus.  A short one, a month, just to get my bearings together.  Was a long and stressful semester, and although I did get some writing done, it felt labored and hackish; it needs edits something fierce, but I’ve had some of the drive killed.  So I’m going to take it easy for a week or two, finish writing the ending of this thing, edit what I’ve got, and on July first, I’ll post up the next chapter.

 

I’m actually pretty far along with the writing, incidentally...  Have the ending partially written, and have the whole thing largely plotted out in my head.  It’s just been problematic trying to get the thing onto, er, electrons.  Hence the hiatus.

 

Anyway, that said, I would like to extend humble thanks to Palaven Blues, whom has been kind enough to continue to beta this story of mine.  And I would like to thank you, dear reader, for continuing to read this thing up to this point.  I must admit, it can’t have been easy, given what’s happened...  But I hope what I have in store for you will be worth the wait.


	29. Apocalypse, Part 1

**A Note From The Author:**

 

Well.  I feel like I should take a break more often.  Really got the creative juices flowing.  Though I still haven’t tied it all together, I feel like I actually have most of the ending written down.

 

Of course, realized a few things really didn’t work...  Pity, because I liked the idea.  Oh well.  C’est la vie.  Anyway, here’s more story!

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

When Okazaki had been Past, it had taken him a few moments to realize he was even under attack, Okazaki reflected.  To say that he had been in complete disarray after the nuclear assault would be no exaggeration.  He had not been in any shape to resist an assault; much less one that had taken advantage of his weaknesses so fully.

 

This wasn't to say that he had been completely surprised by his attack.  Almost immediately after he had regained some measure of his faculties, he had realized that an attack was almost inevitable.  Of course, he hadn't expected it to occur seconds after he'd found himself again.

 

Okazaki watched as the first hypervelocity rounds fired from specially designed submersibles shattered many of Past's surviving infantry fragments.  His tanks, mostly made of armor due to not having crew compartments, would have survived the attack, albeit with damage.  His infantry might have been able to jump out of direct line of fire if he'd noticed sooner.  By the time Past had realized the rounds were inbound, it was far too late for him to avoid them.

 

Ammo ran out quickly, but not before every single infantry fragment was destroyed.  Okazaki's infantry, the Terminator lookalikes, advanced quickly, and poured out a dense countermeasure smoke in front of them.  Past's tanks fired blindly into the oncoming smoke cloud, but completely missed; Okazaki knew where the laser beams and mortar rounds would hit.

 

He took a measure of solace in that the chaos butterfly hadn’t had any effect, in spite of the fact that Fujibayashi and Tamafuki had died.  It meant that their deaths had happened before; it hadn’t been for nothing, at least.

 

Okazaki's forces dispersed into the middle of Past's tanks, and began to jump.  Sonic cannons from Past's tanks fired upon them, to little effect; human soldiers would have been pulped, missiles would have detonated, but the heavy cyborgs were unfazed.  The cyborgs placed their payloads precisely.  As the cyborgs jumped away, explosions destroyed laser cannons and treads, effectively disabling the tanks.

 

Past tried to bring Okazaki's cyborgs into the firing lines of his laser cannons.  But Okazaki's cyborgs were fast; faster than the laser turrets could traverse at those short ranges.  More tanks fell quickly.  Okazaki took a moment to set thermite charges on disabled tanks, directly above controlling brains and fusion reactors; all of the important portions that would make salvaging the units easy.

 

Okazaki remembered that this was the point at which he had known the battle was lost, and had started to pull back.  He had, of course, been surprised and frustrated when the cyborgs had kept up with his units.

 

Okazaki found the situation almost amusing as he disabled a few more of Past's tanks.  It was schadenfreude again, mixed with hatred for what he had done.  He deserved so much more than he would be giving his past self, but he wasn't going to cause a paradox just to torture himself.  There would be time enough to do that after Past was defeated.

 

As expected, Past opened fire with his own artillery, trying to at least claim a pyrrhic victory from the attack.  Okazaki disabled the last few tanks and let his cyborgs flee the situation, as Past's own artillery rounds smashed his own tanks around.  The second wave would finish off the now badly damaged vehicles.

 

Okazaki wanted to laugh.  It was almost too easy.  He knew what would happen, what his past self's weaknesses were, and he had forces specially designed just to destroy his past self's units.  The phrase 'like shooting fish in a barrel' came to mind.  He had always wondered what had been on the mind of his opponent when he had been on the other side of this fight, and now he knew for sure.

 

In spite of himself, he felt at home for the first time in a while.  Cordite.  Ozone.  The coppery smell of freshly spilt blood, the acrid smell of burning plastics, the metallic tang of vaporized steel.  All smells he was intimately familiar with, and reminded him of simpler times.

 

He hated them dearly.  His urge to fight, his blood lust, they had resulted in the deaths billions already, and had taken the lives or minds of all of his friends.  And even that wasn't enough to keep him from enjoying the fighting.  He wondered if he ever would lose those urges.  As he thought about it, he realized that after all that had happened, he still enjoyed it and wanted more.  That would always be a part of him.

 

 _'Is this all I am, in the end?'_ he wondered idly _.  'Someone who can only fight and kill?  Someone who will always end up hurting and killing my friends?  Is this all I am now?'_

 

He shrugged the feelings off and worked on pushing Past inland.  Though he hated the fact, having bloodlust such as his made the tasks ahead of him all the easier.

 

\----0----

 

Kotomi stopped asking Okazaki questions altogether a few days after his past self's mass nuking.  As far as he could tell, it was coincidental timing.  She no longer watched the news or asked him what was happening; all she did anymore was work on some sort of project.

 

He wasn't sure what it was, but he was fairly sure it involved his mind-to-machine interface.  He had divulged nearly everything he could about it to her, and had said as much shortly before she stopped asking questions.  In his mind, there were a few things that whatever she was working on could do; something to perhaps render his mind-to-machine interface impotent, or perhaps something that merely prevented his fragments from speaking to one another.

 

He didn't dare assume it would be something beneficial to him.  He suspected she hated him to some degree now, and if so, he certainly could not blame her in the least.  He wondered if it could match the hatred he had for himself and his actions.  He doubted it sincerely, but there was no way to know for sure.

 

The worst part of it was that he knew that it didn't really matter.  Not now.  What had been done was done, and there was no turning back.  All he could hope for was that she waited to wreak her vengeance until after he had finished eradicating Past and had ensured humanity's survival on a post-apocalyptic planet.

 

Beyond that, whatever she did to him, he welcomed it.  Perhaps she would find a way to kill him, as Ushio had promised.  He welcomed that too, in spite of knowing he might end up back in Ushio's world.  In a way, he sort of hoped it would be her to do it.  Maybe she could find solace in his death and move on, if she were the one.  At this stage, it was all he could hope for.

 

As he thought about it, he realized all he feared of death was that he would continue to exist onward past that point.  Simple cessation of existence would be a relief for him at this point.  But perhaps to continue on, remembering what he had done and regretting every bloody inch of his past, perhaps that would be sufficient penitence for his sins.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki pushed Past inland.  The few tactical victories that his past self won were strategic losses, and in dark parody of the world's armies, Past's forces began to break just two months into Okazaki's assault.

 

He remembered what it had been like.  Retaliatory attacks had turned into bloody ambushes that invariably destroyed all his attacking units.  Then each time, a counterattack had destroyed the base he had attacked from, while its defenses were weakened from the lack of the assault units.  The pattern had repeated itself until he stopped sending out retaliatory units.

 

It had only gotten worse, then, as artillery had started pounding on his bases.  It had been like the first engagement all over again each time, leaving very little left to attack with.  His final action, to scuttle the attacked base with an internal warhead, had only occasionally been successful.

 

It had been like his assailant knew exactly how he thought and planned accordingly, a fact that Okazaki found funny in hindsight.

 

He had thought that one last assault might be enough to turn the tables, and perhaps save himself from being utterly destroyed.  He scraped together what few units he had left that he could spare, and sent them toward the locations he knew the enemy had been attacking from.

 

It had taken them nearly a month to cross the ocean, facing harassment both from remnants of the world's navies as well as attacks from what he hadn’t known at the time to be his future self.  Even as more bases had crumbled behind him, and in spite of those attacks, he still had been able to make it within striking distance of the enemy bases.

 

Okazaki remembered how hopeless it had seemed to him at the time.  He had known he would probably still lose.  But he had also known the mysterious enemy had never really been on the defensive, either.  It had been a desperate, mad last hope; a gamble on relative inexperience, one he hadn’t known had been rigged from the start.

 

As such, he had opted to do anything, just for the chance of victory.  This had included launching what few nukes he had produced since his retaliation at the mysterious enemy’s fortifications.  It hadn’t been as if a few more would cause much more damage to the biosphere at that point, he had rationalized.

 

\----0----

 

While Past sailed toward the city, Okazaki himself prepared.  Specifically, there was a still unsettled matter he needed to deal with, and that was the path to the school.

 

He had started building the monumental construct as soon as he had fully established his base.  Exceedingly careful use of nanites - with electromagnetic pulse generators on hand to deal with potential 'gray goo' incidents - allowed him to build a carbon nanotube shell under the entire path, using carbon in the dirt for materials.  A small, easily collapsed tunnel brought motors and fuel to the construct.

 

He started building it only because his memories told him the path shouldn't be there.  Tomoyo's love of the path, and the memory of her death, told him what to do with it.  The approach of his past self told him when he needed to set his plan into motion.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki looked over at Kotomi with a frown as she typed at her laptop.  In the months since the mass nuking, she had not spoken a word to him.  He hadn't attempted to get her to speak to him, either.  Each day he thought about saying something, but always stopped himself, realizing there was nothing left to say that wasn't a hollow assurance or empty apology.

 

It was just as well in a way, he felt.  Each time he locked eyes with her, he died just a little more.  One way or another, Ushio was right.  Kotomi was suffering the worst.  Sunohara had the comfort of distance from him.  Kyou had retreated into the comfort of madness.  Fujibayashi, Ryou, and Tomoyo were dead.  Kotomi had none of those comforts.

 

As he thought about it, he realized that the only one not really suffering whose life he had touched was Fuko; at least as far as he knew.  That was only because she hadn't been around long enough, he knew.  If he hadn't healed her, if she had stayed in town afterward, he was sure she would be suffering, too.

 

He turned his thoughts to the girl at the laptop that had once been Kotomi.  She was broken.  That much was plain to see.  But not to the point of insanity.  And she still stayed at his side, even if he was sure that was to give her the chance to use whatever weapon she was making.

 

He found himself frequently wishing that she'd just use it already, and put him out of his misery, damn the paradox.  Then he'd scream at himself, furious at his desire for a respite, furious that he would think of letting a potentially universe-ending paradox occur.  Inevitably, he would also remember that he'd probably just end up back at Ushio's, anyway.

 

He shook the thoughts from his mind and sighed.  There wasn't much time.

 

"Kotomi chan," he ventured quietly.

 

She made no response, save to turn her head in his direction.

 

"I...  We need to go to the bunker.  I...  My past self is..."  He looked down and to the side.

 

Kotomi regarded him blankly for a moment, before turning to her laptop and closing out of the program she had been using.

 

Okazaki sighed with relief.  He didn't want to have to bring her by force.  But if she stayed, she would die, and he wanted that even less.

 

She silently shut her laptop down, stood, picked it up, and walked past him toward the elevator closet.

 

He shook his head and followed.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki had been able to use the investigators he'd taken over to keep him within Hikarizaka, rather than being sent to a prison elsewhere.  The investigators probably wouldn't have been enough if it hadn't been for the fact that there was a war waging across the ocean.  Ironically, Tomoyo's words helped him in that regard.  He stated, through the investigators, that though there was no evidence at his home, there was reason to believe he was somehow involved, thanks to her raving about his crimes.

 

Even so, the police had already done everything legal to him that they could to try to make him talk, and even a few things that could be considered outside of the law.  At worst, the attempts were annoying.  Either way, they didn't prompt him to speak.  Not that they didn't try, more and more desperately as the war took turns for the worse, and most of the less legal attempts occurred after the great atomic cleansing had occurred.

 

The better part of a year, playing mute in a jail.  He almost had to smile, thinking of what the expression would be on his guard's face.

 

"The time for waiting is over," Okazaki said.  "It's time for talking."

 

The guard didn't disappoint him.

 

\----0----

 

"Now, Mr. Okazaki, could you repeat that again?" Komatsu Gorou asked a few minutes later.  The balding chief of police raised a bushy gray eyebrow and leaned forward to rest his hands on the desk.  He stared at Okazaki expectantly.

 

An officer stood guard behind Okazaki, rubbing his fingertips on the pistol in his holster.

 

"I need you to evacuate the city," Okazaki replied.

 

"That's an interesting request.  And why should I grant it?"

 

"I assume you have read the case reports about me, and about Sakagami Tomoyo?"

 

"I have.  That's why I'm speaking to you at all.  That doesn't mean I believe any of it."

 

"I suspect that, whatever she said, it's true."

 

A commotion from the hall made Komatsu turn his head for a second before he frowned at Okazaki.  "Apologies if I find that hard to buy, considering how little proof-"

 

A knocking at the door interrupted him.

 

"Proof, Komatsu san?"  Okazaki smiled wryly.  "If you'll open your door, I believe you'll find sufficient proof."

 

Komatsu frowned and nodded to the guarding officer, whom reached over to open the door.  He then yelped and snapped his pistol from the holster, training it on the figure in the door.

 

It stood slightly over two meters high.  Though it was vaguely humanoid, there was no mistaking it for a person.  Light gleamed off the vaguely skeletal figure, as it bowed down slightly to enter the room.  Behind it, a number of officers wielding pistols and wooden tonfa formed a nervous semicircle.

 

"Proof," said the figure, with Okazaki's voice.  "Or shall I have to produce more units before you believe me?"

 

"...I-I believe you," Komatsu said, as he grasped the edge of his desk hard enough to whiten his knuckles.  "Then you are what destroyed the rest of the world?"

 

Okazaki frowned.  "I see the story you have received is incomplete.  No, I am fighting against him.  The problem is, he is underway.  And he will destroy this city, make no mistake.  However, I have a bunker underneath the city.  It will be easy enough to evacuate to there.  Your officers, however, would make the process considerably more painless than if I had to perform this task myself."

 

"Why did you kill that girl?  And that boy?"

 

Okazaki grit his teeth.  "That was... an accident.  A tragic, heart wrenching accident....  She was my friend.  I never...."  He sighed and shook his head.  "Look, that's not important right now.  We need to evacuate the city, and we need to do so immediately."

 

"Why should I believe that?  Why should I do anything you say?"

 

"Simply, because if you don't, I will have to force the issue.  I would rather not do this, it'll just get people hurt.  But if I have to, I will."

 

"...I suppose you're implying we do not have a choice in the matter?"

 

"You are correct."

 

Komatsu leaned back and breathed a sigh.

 

"Think of it this way," Okazaki said.  "Your duty is to protect the people, is it not?  Aiding me, one way or another, will be in line with your duties."

 

"I don't like it."  Komatsu admitted, rubbing his face.  "But I do not see an alternative.  Very well, where do you need us?"

 

The figure slowly pulled out a map from within its torso, and handed it to Komatsu, whom took it with a nervous glance at the war machine.  "The locations on the map are where you need to send people.  I will be able to handle things from that point on."

 

Komatsu studied the map for a few seconds before nodding.  "Very well."

 

"Thank you," Okazaki said, and bowed.

 

\----0----

 

Outside the door, an investigator listened in on the conversation.  He had been one of the officers that had looked into Okazaki's house.  He looked at the other officers with a frown and turned away, going to the break room to make a phone call.

 

His former identity would have made the call anyway, Okazaki knew.  But under Okazaki's direction, he could make sure the right information got through.  It was time for what remained of the Japanese Self-Defense Force to make its stand.


	30. Apocalypse, Part 2

Minutes later, policemen began knocking on doors.  They told those who answered to pack up what they could carry and go to the nearest elevator shaft- the robotic nemesis, destroyer of the world, was underway.  Very few needed to be told twice.

 

Okazaki used his less obtrusive fragments to keep an eye on things.  In particular, he noted what houses were emptied, and what houses still had people within that didn't answer the door.  Again, the number of people that chose to avoid the door was thankfully few; it would make retrieving them unnoticed all the easier.  He wasn't going to leave anyone behind.

 

One particular house in the suburbs, a small, western style house with white siding and solar panels on the roof, caught his eye.  Or rather, the figures who stepped out of the door did.

 

He recognized them right off, if only by their faces.  Fujibayashi Kyou and Ryota walked as directed by the police, although in Kyou's case it would have been more accurate to say that she _shambled_.  Her uneven gait and vacant eyes reminded him all too much of the classical zombie, even as Ryota guided her along.

 

For a brief moment, he wondered why she hadn’t been taken to a mental hospital, but then remembered- there was still a strong bias against the mentally ill.  It was rare to see it in action, even for one such as him; one of the better hidden flaws still prevalent in the society.  Many families still would choose to hide an ailing family member away rather than seek help; such was the case here, if he was to judge.

 

He mentally grit his teeth.  There was nothing he could do at present about the situation.  He was the last person that could help in her case.  And any help he offered would likely be rebuffed by Ryota, even if all he did was call in a professional.  As he watched them proceed, he became aware of a sudden pressure on the ankle of the fragment of his being that was doing the watching.  He looked down, curious.

 

Another instance of familiarity.  A baby boar, with stubby legs and brown stripes running across its back, shook its head for a moment.  _'It's Botan,'_ he realized, as it took a few steps back and then rammed its head into the fragment's ankle.  _‘Kyou’s pet.  I guess it knows I am to blame for her condition....’_

 

With a sigh, Okazaki reached down slowly, with hope that he could placate the small creature.  When his hand got in range however, Botan jumped up and bit down on the metallic hand of the drone.  He sighed again, even as he noted that Kyou had stopped to look at the situation.

 

 _'Well, that's a reaction at least,'_ Okazaki noted, and then mentally blinked.  Someone was running from the police; his yellow shirt and black pants seemed familiar.  As he watched on, he realized he recognized the man.  _'The same one who hit the bus.'_   A strange thought struck him in the spur of the moment.  _'...Doesn't he have any different clothing?'_

 

The man made a running jump into his rather battered car.  Quicker than Okazaki had expected, the man had started the vehicle.  The engine roared as the man pressed the gas down, and the car began to accelerate.  However, the man clearly wasn't quite in control of his vehicle, evidenced by the fact that his car had begun to fishtail.

 

Okazaki quickly snapped Botan up and behind him to shield the baby boar with his body, as the out of control car smashed into his form.  He and the car had roughly the same mass, and as such the fragment of Okazaki was forced backward even as the car came to a very quick stop.

 

 _'Well, that happened,'_ he thought with a sigh, as he noted Kyou looking at him wide eyed.  He then blinked.  Something felt strange about the bundle he held in his hands.  Suddenly, he very much desired not to look at Botan.  Slowly, he turned his head to his hands.

 

Red.  He turned away.

 

 _'Too strong,'_ he thought _.  'I'm too strong like this.  I tried to save her and she just...'_   He looked toward Kyou again.

 

He knew, as he watched her collapse to her knees, that whatever sanity she had recovered at seeing Botan attack him was gone.  He could see it in her vacant eyes, as he watched helplessly while a single tear rolled down her cheek.

 

Ryota, Okazaki noted, had fixed him with a glare that made him wonder if looks could actually kill.  He picked Kyou up gently and began to carry her, and pointedly turned away from Okazaki's fragment to follow the police's instructions.

 

 _'That's....  So I've taken her sister, and now her pet,'_ Okazaki thought numbly as his drone freed his leg from the car _.  '...It's funny actually.  I can't protect anything in the end, can I?  Even when I try....'_ His fragment cradled the corpse of Botan in its arms and began to walk toward the school path.  There was only one thing he could do now for her, and that was a proper burial.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki only tangentially acknowledged it when he received word that everyone had been taken into the bunkers.

 

 _'Gods,'_ he thought silently as he made final preparations.  _'I try to protect my friends, and....'_   He couldn't complete the thought.  _'I wonder if even trying to protect people is the right path.  It's become obvious that I can't do it.  It always goes wrong....  They'd probably be safer outside of the bunkers, somehow.'_

 

He mentally shook his head.  There was no time to waste.  There was still one final matter that needed to be resolved, before he could ensure a paradox free battle.  All that remained was to make the sakura trees disappear.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki planned to save the path.  He'd started doing so because he'd seen that the path was gone when he attacked.  He added another reason to do so in light of Tomoyo and Takafumi's deaths, and most recently Botan's; it would honor their memories as well.  It was all he could do, and it seemed pathetically small.

 

It had taken him a while to come up with a way to do it that matched what he remembered.  His first plans had involved using rockets to lift the whole path at once.  Such an attempt not only had almost insurmountable engineering issues, but there was also the fact that such an attempt would destroy the town almost as well as the nuclear bomb would.  The pressure wave and heat from enough engines to lift that much material would be devastating.

 

He didn't need to destroy the town twice.  And there was an easier way.  It would require some assembly at the endpoint, however.

 

His first task was to make sure the path was clear.  He'd done that by evacuating the city.  To be sure, he double checked the path.  All clear.  He started the second part of the task.

 

There was a hum, and from underneath portions of the path, large, quick spinning blades sprung up and cut through the concrete, dirt, and all other obstacles.  The paths were slightly curved, and precisely calibrated to miss tree trunks.  The blades disappeared, having cut the entire path in long rows.  A few minutes later, the blades returned, cutting perpendicular to the previous cuts.  The path was now divided into large chunks.

 

Nearest to the street, the first chunk began to move.  It rolled up onto the street, revealing tracks and machinery under the section.  A laser burnt away power lines in the way of the tree that rode on top.  The second section followed closely behind.  More sections wheeled out behind those.

 

In under an hour, the entire pathway was on the road.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki's evacuation of civilians was a scene played out all over Japan, and in what was left of South Korea.  Past launched his assault against all the bases he knew about, hoping beyond hope that they would be successful, knowing he had little other choice than taking them all out if he wanted to survive.  Fragments of the fleet had already split off to attack different regions.

 

The largest portion headed straight toward Hikarizaka.  As far as he had known, that was the center of his enemy's forces.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki reflected on how he, as Past, had planned his attack while he watched Past send the bulk of his forces toward Hikarizaka.  The city laid on the coast of a bay, protected somewhat from attack by a narrow inlet.  The ships Past had brought with him were mostly 'liberated' from their previous owners, including one aircraft carrier; he'd had very little in the way of a navy, which necessitated their use.

 

He had approached the inlet cautiously.  The narrow bottleneck had screamed 'trap' to him.  At the very least, there were likely hidden mines or torpedo launchers set up to take advantage of the tight confines an attacking fleet would face if it wanted to land an assault force directly in the city.

 

The alternative had been equally problematic, however.  It would have been easy enough to land his forces on the shore around the inlet and march into town that way, after softening it up with airburst and bunker busting nuclear weaponry, but it ran the risk of interception on ground.  He had wanted to avoid that if possible, it'd become a frustrating reality that he almost invariably lost ground engagements against his mysterious enemy.

 

He had decided to split the difference.  A third of his forces landed on either side of the inlet, while he sent his ships through the inlet one at a time, starting with the more disposable vessels.  He also used aircraft from the carrier to get more information on the defending forces.

 

He had sent a pair of recon fighters to fly low above the city directly, looking for obvious defensive emplacements.  The large crater that used to be the path to the school he had first faced himself at had made him very curious.  He had also noted the apparent lack of defenses.

 

Two missiles launched from radar stealthed aircraft had sent his recon fighters into evasive maneuvers.  They had launched flares and chaff, trying to distract the missiles.  One successfully threw off its attacker.  The other had to use its combat laser to shoot down the missile.

 

There had been a pause, and ten more missiles followed up on the previous pair.  His two recon fighters had gone down, trailing fire.

 

Encouraged by their success, the flight of fighter-bombers launched air to surface missiles at the ships of Past.  The ships were able to shoot down most of the missiles.  One hit the control tower of the carrier.

 

Past tracked the missile launches back to their source.  The wing of JSDF fighters were fifth generation, almost invisible to radar.  However, their visual camouflage was insufficient to hide them.  Lasers shot out, destroying the aircraft in flight.

 

Long range radar had told him he wasn’t out of trouble yet.  He had thought at the time that the Japanese must have sent nearly every single aircraft they had left to intercept his forces; Okazaki realized however that they had also been supplemented by a few Chinese and South Korean aircraft as well.

 

In those numbers, they would have been able to destroy his landing party, even with all of them firing anti-missile lasers.  However, the aircraft weren't up against just the ground forces.

 

His ships had managed to make their way through a hostile ocean with only minimal damage, thanks largely in part to a hasty refit.  Also thanks to large numbers of fighters.  The carrier started launching its aircraft as advanced optics began tracking JSDF planes.

 

The JSDF air force launched its missiles.  The ship based lasers opened fire.  So too did Past’s aircraft.  The ground forces also offered their input.

 

Fifty-two seconds later, the skies were clear.  Past’s own air assets were stripped away however, and an outlying destroyer was sinking.  He had, at the time, decided that to be worrying, but ultimately unimportant.  Aircraft in general, even his, simply weren't durable to be much help except against human piloted aircraft.

 

He had turned his attention back to the city.  His recon flight had told him it was undefended.  In theory, that meant that a nuclear strike would be successful, and would soften the city up for a ground assault.

 

He hadn't bought it, of course.  Still, he had taken the opportunity to see what happened to a launched nuclear missile.  The weapon ascended on a pillar of flame, and he tracked it through radar as it neared the city.  It had closed in.  Closer.  Almost in range.  Closer still.

 

The world had chosen, a few moments too soon, to turn to white.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki recalled that it had taken him a few moments to realize that another nuclear initiation had taken place.  Specifically, it had taken place just behind his fleet of ships.  The rearmost ships were instantly disabled, their keels smashed beyond repair by the underwater detonation.  They began to sink almost immediately.

 

The carrier was closer to the shore, but that didn't save it from being effectively disabled.  The blast wave smashed the rudder and engines, preventing him from controlling the ship.  The wave the nuclear weapon generated also became an issue.  It picked up the massive carrier and sent it forward.

 

The carrier had shielded an oceanside apartment complex from the blast wave itself.  However, the wave sent the carrier to do what the nuclear weapon failed to.  The massive prow of the ship smashed into the complex like a hammer thrown at a house of cards.

 

The apartment complex fell to pieces, as walls were smashed and timbers were ripped asunder.  The roof of the complex tilted up for a moment, before splitting in half.  What the carrier did not destroy, the wave that had flung it finished.

 

The bow of the carrier buried itself in the land the complex had been built upon.  The wave forced it forward even so.  Its hull buckled and failed under the stresses, and it scrunched up in the middle with a deafening screech of tortured metal.

 

Water seeped into the newly opened reactor chamber, and was instantly rendered into plasma by the high temperatures.  The resulting explosion peeled the carrier apart like a giant banana.  It was almost an insult added to injury.

 

Past's fleet was destroyed.  There was no turning back for him.  It hadn't mattered, though.  He was there.  He wouldn't be turned away.

 

Okazaki looked on as Past took stock of his losses.

 

\----0----

 

_His ground force had taken only sparse damage, to his surprise; particularly considering that a good half of them had been aboard the carrier.  That the ship had split itself along the seams had actually helped him with deployment._

_His entire left flanking deployment was effectively destroyed, however.  The ships that had been carrying it had either been vaporized by the nearly point blank nuclear initiation, or had been sufficiently damaged to sink like stones.  What surviving units there were in the sunken ships were trying to rip their way out and form up into a useful force.  He decided to use them as a distraction._

_As an afterthought, he had one of them remove the nuclear warhead on one of the sunken missiles.  It probably wouldn't work, but if he could get enough of the enemy surrounding the distraction group, sacrificing the group to destroy a good number of enemy units would take off some of the expected pressure on his main force._

_Certainly, it would be a turnaround from the usual frustration of having a small number of enemy units wipe out many times their number.  Turnabout was fair play in love and war, after all._

_He wished he had satellite view, though.  Those had been destroyed early into the campaign, and each new one he launched was shot down by what he thought to be land based lasers before they could even properly deploy.  The lack of information was distressing._

_He mentally shrugged.  No point complaining about what he had no control over.  Besides, if he was successful here, launching satellites might become a viable action again.  Wishful thinking, perhaps; much like his thoughts that he could still win the war.  Wouldn't stop him from trying.  He would keep up trying until the last base was gone, the last drone was crushed, and the last contingency plan was stopped._

_It would be too much of a waste to just give up and stop now.  He'd done far too much to give up early._

 

\----0----

 

For the city of Hikarizaka, apocalypse was at hand.  The flash, brighter than the sun, had instantly set fire to everything flammable.  Instants later, the pressure wave smashed the city like the fist of an angry god.  An expanding sphere of destruction flattened all it touched, turning a once thriving city into a desolate, burning ruin.

 

Kotomi's house was flattened.  The trees that had once added to the property burned along with the yard Okazaki had planted.  Their burning remains would contribute to the firestorm that would engulf the city.

 

Okazaki's house weathered both the flash and the pressure wave better than their surroundings, thanks to Okazaki having reinforced the building.  It didn't emerge unscathed, however; the roof caved in, and a timber smashed down on Okazaki's bed.  The bed was built to withstand having a 320 Kg cyborg rest on it, however, and only buckled slightly under the impact.

 

Hikarizaka Private High School burned.  The flash had set it on fire, and the pressure wave had smashed open the buildings, allowing the fire to spread.  Flames belched from a multitude of gaping holes in the structures.

 

The shopping district had been near the epicenter of the initiation.  A thin layer of new glass lined a crater, the center of which was but a few meters away from where a UFO catcher used to be.

 

The hospital had actually survived better than many of the other buildings.  But the flash that had lit so many other buildings also touched the hospital.  Empty beds burned like kindling, their occupants having been moved shortly beforehand to the underground bunker, where Okazaki worked on healing them in his own facilities.

 

The city was no more.  The fight for the remains had yet to begin, but it would start shortly.  Okazaki's memories told him that much.

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A Note From The Author:**

 

You know, I remember when this was a Clannad fic.  Somehow, it’s ended warping into... this.  I can’t say I’m exactly pleased.  Guess that’s what I get for letting it write itself.

 

Anyway!  I’d just like to thank Palaven Blues for her work betaing this, and continued forbearance of the fact that I’m kind of an asshole.  Thank you!  I’d also like to thank everyone who has reviewed so far, and has continued to review.  Lastly, I’d like to thank everyone who has made it this far, because, well...  I know the urge to leave after certain things happening must have been high after certain things started happening, but you didn’t, so hey!  Thank you so much for sticking with it!

 

Now then, there are some issues to note.  I may have to go on hiatus again after next month, we’ll see.  Problem is that I made a major-ish change, and I’ll need to work around the effects of that in later chapters.  Problematic, but it is what it is.  Story wasn’t as good without the change, so hey.  Plus side, it may not be as bad as I think it may; I won’t know for sure until I start in on it.  Of course, to do that, I need to finish up the changed bit...  Hm.

 

Well anyway, so long and thanks for all the fish!


	31. Checkmate, Part 1

**A Note From The Author:**

 

So I’ve been informed this half of the chapter is somewhat bland.  On the other hand, I’ve been told the next half of this chapter is pretty good.  Hm.  Something to look forward to, I suppose!

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

Okazaki frowned, in as much as a hivemind could be said to frown.  Everything so far was going according to plan, but something still seemed off to him.  He couldn't place it, however _.  'It feels just like right before Fujibayashi's death,_ ' he reflected _.  'That same sense that I am missing something.  But what?'_

 

He quickly checked the locations of his units.  Everything was either in the right location, or was close enough to be in the right location when his past self's remaining forces descended on the burning city.  The JSDF units...

 

A number of his fragments blinked in surprise.  The JSDF did have tanks, he knew; in his past life, he had faced off with them just over three kilometers outside of city limits.  However, there were more tanks present than he had fought.  Their posture was wrong as well.  Rather than hiding hull-down as he remembered, they looked very much like they were planning to move out, toward his past self's forces.

 

_'...What on earth are they doing?  That's not what I remember happening.  They wouldn’t possibly be thinking of attacking?  That’d be insane, not to mention paradox inducing!'_

 

His mind raced as he observed their deployment.  His first instinct, to destroy a few of the tanks and force them into a defensive position, was overruled.  He didn't want to fight innocent people any more than he had to, and destroying the tanks would leave wreckage that hadn't been present before.

 

He watched on with growing apprehension.  An attack would go straight into a highly radioactive area as well.  While not exactly standard operating procedure, the sane thing to do-which was what he remembered happening-would have been to let his past self stew in the radiation.  Though the JSDF tanks were probably protected against nuclear, biological, and chemical threats, he still wouldn't bank on them launching an attack into an irradiated zone.

 

He watched the tank formation warily, hoping that the extra tanks were preparing to depart the field before they fortified.

 

\----0----

 

It didn’t take Okazaki long to realize what the most efficient solution was.  All it required was to sell yet another piece of his returned humanity.  If he could eat the mind of the JSDF commander, it would be easy enough to order some of the tanks back as a rearguard.  Simple plan, with the problem that there were new security measures in place to prevent his past self's infiltrations.

 

But the city and the surrounding locations were his.  There were ways around such obstacles.

 

With a sigh, he set his newest plan in motion, hoping that there wouldn't be any other reason past that point to sell another part of his humanity.  Preventing a paradox might have been a worthy endeavor, but that didn't make it right.

 

\----0----

 

Ten minutes later, Okazaki inhabited the body of the JSDF commander.

 

"Bring up fifth, sixth and ninth company's commanders," he ordered the communications officer.

 

"Sir."

 

Several seconds passed before their faces appeared on the screen.

 

"Fall back to bivouac," he ordered.  "We need to have a reserve force."

 

"Ah, but sir," the commander of sixth company said, "shouldn't we be hitting them with everything we have while they are disorganized?"

 

"Did I stutter?  Fall back."

 

Sixth company commander blinked for a few seconds, as if mulling something over.  "...My apologies, General, there seems to be some interference," he said.  His screen went blank, followed shortly by that of fifth and ninth's commanders.

 

Okazaki checked signal strengths with a thought, and frowned.  No interference.  Just willful disregard for orders _.  '...What the hell?  Did they forget about chain of command?  It's not like that was an unreasonable order!'_ "If they get back, have them court-martialed," he said, to no one in particular.  "Bring up first, second, and third company's commanders, then."

 

"Er, yes sir."

 

He repeated his order to fall back to the commanders.  The commanders, in turn, pulled a similar 'broken radio' ploy before cutting out.  He frowned deeply.

 

_'Once is happenstance, twice is coincidence....'_

 

"This is a bad time for a mutiny.  Get me fourth, seventh, and eighth company's commanders, then."

 

"Yes sir."

 

The same order was sent out.  The same ploy was performed.

 

Okazaki was suddenly out of relatively peaceful options.  He leaned back in his seat heavily.  Unless three companies came back on their own, he would have a paradox on his hands.  Worse, if they opted to attack rather than perform a holding action, it was a paradox twice over.

 

Which would make all his sacrifices for the sake of not destroying the universe all for nothing.  Fujibayashi.  Tomoyo.  Tamafuki.  Furukawa.  All dead because he had needed to preserve the timeline, and now nine company commanders were going to possibly destroy the universe.

 

 _'And who would be interested in seeing that happen?'_ he asked himself rhetorically _.  'Or at least would be interested in seeing a paradox?  Three times is enemy action; and who, really, is our enemy in all of this?  If there's a way to kill someone already dead....'_

 

He had one last ace up his sleeve, though.  He didn't want to have to play it, because it could cause a potential paradox on its own.  Telling the commanders the truth of what was going on, and what was at stake....  It might get them to retreat, but it had the possibility of also causing him to be attacked later on by the JSDF.  Worse, if Past managed to intercept the communication....

 

But he was out of options, and almost out of time.

 

"Set the gear to broadcast to the company commanders.  Doesn't matter if they don't respond, they can hear me at least."

 

"Yes sir....  Ah, it's too late, sir."

 

"What do you...."  He looked at the monitors to see the JSDF tanks moving forward.  _'Well.  Shit.'_

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki watched the battle play out numbly via satellite.

 

The JSDF tanks launched sabot rounds, dart-like shells designed to penetrate armor, from beyond visual range.

 

Past's tanks ignored the sabots, which promptly buried themselves in the frontal glacial armor plating of his tanks, giving them the outward appearance of giant pincushions.  None stopped.

 

The JSDF fired a second volley; not sabot rounds, but high explosive anti-tank shells.  Against normal tanks they could cause a phenomenon known as 'spalling'; explosive force would cause a pressure wave in the metal, which would knock off a disk of material on the opposite side of the armor plate.  Needless to say, having a razor-sharp chunk of steel spinning around in the crew compartment was less than healthy for the vehicle's occupants.

 

His past self's tanks didn't have physical crew.  Merely a trio of brains-in-jars, secure behind layers of armor and padding.  Spalling wasn’t an issue; even with the lack of reactive armor, which normally protected tank crews via the counter-intuitive mechanism of exploding against explosive rounds.  This rendered the high explosive anti-tank shells less than effective.

 

Not to say they were completely ineffective, as they managed to stop a couple tanks that had previously been hit with sabot rounds; lucky shots that hit close enough to where the sabot had sunk in, the shockwaves sent along the sabot itself into more delicate internal portions of the tank, like brain jars and power lines.  Some rounds also found laser cannons and treads, and rendered a number of tanks combat ineffective.

 

Many of the tanks remained operational.  And their return laser volleys were more effective.  Still, the damage had been done.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki let out a collective breath he hadn't realized he had been holding.

 

The world was still there.  No gaping rents in the fabric of reality.  In spite of the fact that there was a definite paradox of memory.  Which meant it had been for nothing.  Kotomi's emotional death.  Kyou's descent into insanity.  All for nothing.  He thought of Kyou's face from the last time he had seen her, thought of Kotomi's dead eyes, and bit back the sensation of a million shards shredding a million hearts.

 

For a moment he was at a loss for what to do.  His one guiding force was gone, replaced by doubt and despair.  He had relied so much on memories to tell him what he had done for so long, he didn't know what to do without them.

 

He collectively took a deep breath and decided on his course of action.  It was too late to change fighting his past self, so he would continue.  There wasn't much different that could happen; neither of them had any choice.  His past self was on the ropes, and he had just enough left to take him on.

 

There was no choice.  Maybe there was before, but there was no choice now.  Not since he had first fought his past self.  Not since Fujibayashi had died.  Ushio had been right, one way or another.  Maybe if he hadn't done it just that way...

 

But it would have required him to convince Past not to fight.  He wasn't sure he could have done that, even if he was given the option.  And without knowing exactly what would happen, Past would have defeated him, easily.  And what did that leave?  Letting Past do what he apparently would, take over the world and then go insane and kill everyone?

 

No, even then, there hadn’t been any other option.  Maybe engaging his past self’s fragment would have saved Fujibayashi and then maybe at least his friends would have survived it all largely alright.  But instead... following his memories to the letter had gotten them killed, either in spirit, in mind, or in body.

 

But it was too late to change the past, or the future.  All that was left was to see it through.  See the end of a pointless war, let Kotomi do whatever she did to him, and perhaps present her with what was left in the hopes that she could save the world in his stead.

 

There was nothing else he could do.

 

\----0----

 

Past was stalled.  More units than Okazaki remembered were destroyed or combat ineffective.  Not by much.  It would still be a struggle to maintain his hold on the city.  Perhaps more so; he no longer knew for certain how Past would act.  He could still make highly educated guesses, though.

 

For one thing, he knew he would have to take certain paths into town.  Paths close enough to present contingencies that they might still work.

 

A tank rolled over one of the contingencies.  On command, a powerful anti-tank mine detonated, destroying the tank.  More went off as tanks wheeled off their paths, destroying them as well.  In the confusion, camouflaged laser cannons shot out at tank treads, disabling further tanks.  The cannons were quickly destroyed as the tanks calculated angles of fire and retaliated.

 

More laser cannons opened fire, raining death on the stalled tanks.  Soon, as he remembered, Past's tanks were gone.  Past's remaining infantry units left the destroyed tanks and started storming the city.

 

\----0----

 

By the remains of Okazaki's house, a fragment of Past looked at the remains of the structure, its featureless face regarding the only partly destroyed building.  It approached the house cautiously, stepping over a pile of rubble to look at the way the roofing timbers lay across his bed.

 

The desk housed, among other things, the end of an artillery cannon barrel.  He fired it at Past’s fragment.  The fragment stumbled backward from the impact, the shell flattening against its torso.  The shell, full of high explosive, detonated.  The fragment of Past’s drone fell into pieces.

 

Another fragment of Past in the area fired on the barrel of the cannon with its laser.  The cannon fired again.  Another fragment died.  More fragments poured lasers on the emplacement.  It fired once more, destroying another assailant.  Then it melted under the intense heat.

 

The attacking infantry approached the remains with the slowness of extreme caution.  Okazaki knew Past was wary of a trap, but also that he knew that there was probably an entrance to the base there.  He let them begin to sift through the rubble before detonating the fuel/air bomb under the house.  A few more infantry were destroyed.  A few more charges destroyed the elevator shaft, preventing easy access from that route.

 

\----0----

 

Several of Past’s fragments were on hand to witness the remains of Hikarizaka Private High School burn.  They considered the area the path had once occupied, before moving forward, looking for entrances to the base underground.

 

Building the machines that had moved the path took a considerable number of connections to that base.  But those connections were filled with other implements now.  Turreted lasers popped up from where the connections had been, and destroyed the infantry.

 

In turn, they were destroyed by another wave of Past’s infantry, their lasers silencing his own.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki's own infantry fragments bore down on Past's fragments, their various armaments tailored to destroy those Past fielded.  At the remaining entrances to the underground base, he made his stands.  Lasers scythed out, destroying units on both sides.

 

One of the entrances, near where Okazaki had almost been hit by Kyou on a scooter, was attacked by the force that held a nuclear warhead.  A laser hit the device, and detonated the explosives within prematurely.  The explosion was large, but not like it could have been.

 

Through it all, the fence remained, a few new holes where lasers had burnt away the wire.

 

\----0----

 

Scenes like those repeated themselves all over the ruined city.  Okazaki attacked Past, who retaliated with the surviving units, which were in turn destroyed by whatever survived.  Attrition was terrible for both of them, and in some places broken-down machines littered the ground, thick as leaves under a tree in fall.

 

As they fought, the city burned around them, the flames joining into massive firestorms added to the apocalyptic ambience.  Okazaki found himself surprised how closely the battle followed to his memories; he anticipated that the JSDF attack would have affected it more.

 

But no, each unit ended up where he expected them to be, for the most part.  There were a few surprises, but nothing that affected the outcome.  A few hours later, the last fragment of Past’s died, trying to fling itself through an open elevator shaft.  Rather anticlimactically, the siege of Hikarizaka ended.

 

Similar scenes played themselves out all across Japan and South Korea.  The last remnants of Past's attack force were destroyed in similar fashions, a last attempt to breach his bases defeated.  The price was heavy, however.

 

Japan and South Korea were effectively destroyed, finishing the job Past had started when he launched his nukes.  The JSDF and their South Korean counterparts had been slain almost to a man.  Nuclear weapons had razed all infrastructure that did not belong to Okazaki.

 

Okazaki made a rough determination that it would be at least five years before it would be safe to venture out onto the surface.  It was much as he suspected.  Breaking the news to those displaced was unpleasant.  However, in Japan at least, it was accepted with a certain national pride; if nothing else, Okazaki was Japanese, and he had fought in defense of the homeland.

 

He didn't shatter their illusions.  It would do nothing but start a riot.

 

\----0----

 

"It's over," Okazaki announced quietly to Kotomi.

 

"I see," Kotomi said, as she typed on her laptop.

 

They sat within a room within his bunker, which effectively was the center of his being.  Rows upon rows of small cylindrical tanks, each with a brain inside, filled the large room.  He'd used a similar setup in the past, where they acted as literal nerve centers, helping to coordinate his forces.  While he could work almost as well without them, the benefit of having extra processing power was undeniable.

 

Of course, the resultant temporary drop in performance whenever he had destroyed one of Past's bases was also a weakness.  But one he could generally afford; except when facing himself, it was nearly impossible to reach.

 

He wanted Kotomi to know where the room was.  Whatever she had planned, it would doubtlessly be most effective if she did it here.

 

"What happens now?" she asked.

 

"Now, I finish mopping up Past.  It won't take much at this point, he... I am all but spent.  Then, there will be the final confrontation."

 

"How long?"

 

"Within the month.  Assuming....  Assuming all goes according to memory, the final confrontation will be on the 26th."

 

"Assuming all goes according to memory?"

 

Okazaki frowned and looked at Kotomi, who stared back expressionlessly.  He turned his head.

 

"There....  There was a paradox.  The JSDF attacked in force, where previously they had dug in."

 

She stopped typing and looked over at him.

 

He stared at one of the tanks, purposely avoiding her eyes.

 

After a too long moment, she spoke.  "Then my parents were right."

 

"Yeah."

 

"Your efforts to avoid a paradox were for nothing."

 

"Yeah."

 

"Ryou-"

 

He whirled around to face her.  "Do you think I don't know?  Do you think I do not realize what I've...."  He clenched his fist.

 

She looked down at her computer for a moment, then back at Okazaki.

 

He didn't say anything further, choosing instead to look down at his hands.  The sound of typing resumed, and he let out a sigh.


	32. Checkmate, Part 2

Everything still went according to Okazaki's memory.  Past was spent, able only to offer token resistance.  Soon all that was left were his bases in the arctic.  Fifty bases.  Then twenty.  Five.  One.

 

Okazaki paid a heavy price for it.  Even with pushing every unit he could produce into the fight, attrition was wearing his forces down.  But it worked.  Past was as good as finished.  Where previously he had stood tall, millions of units at his command, thousands of bases, and half the world under his heel, he was now down to less than a thousand infantry and a single base almost exactly on the south pole.

 

Okazaki remembered how it had been.  He hadn't given up even then, stubborn to the last, but his heart wasn't in the fight anymore.  His heart hadn't been in the fight since his friends had died, since he had made the world a funeral pyre in their memory.

 

Stubbornness alone temporarily held the lines as he had tried to detonate a base's nuke rather than let his enemy have it.  Stubbornness alone had made him send out escape ships toward Mercury, Mars, and all the minor planets he could launch them toward.

 

Stubbornness alone had made him keep fighting on when those ships were destroyed, ensuring his fate was sealed.  Stubbornness, but no genuine desire to carry on.

 

Okazaki also remembered that that the war would end with his last remaining fragment fighting an enemy fragment in single combat, both surrounded by nuclear weapons.  A peculiar sort of honorable death for someone whom neither party thought deserved it.  He planned to grant it, even so.  Even despite the fact that there was no longer a need to prevent a paradox.

 

The memories had to come from somewhere, he had rationalized after a few days thought.  Whether they were from one universe or another, it didn't matter.  Maybe this Past would turn into another Okazaki, and become horrified when the JSDF refused insane orders to attack.  Perhaps it didn't matter, but he would do so either way.  He hadn't lost any stubbornness to death.

 

So he fought on according to his memories.  The nuclear weapons were brought in.  Past’s fragments were systematically destroyed.  The last fragment was isolated in the main tank bay.  The war had reached its final battle.

 

\----0----

 

"It's time," Okazaki declared.

 

Kotomi looked up toward him.  She had finished whatever she had been working on last week, and now, except for necessities, simply stayed seated where she had set up her computer.

 

He was too tired to say anything, and knew there was nothing to say anyway.  All he could do was tend to her needs, as much as he could.

 

But final victory was now in sight.  Time to pay the piper.

 

"Past is all but destroyed.  After that....  After that, do what you need to."

 

She regarded him blankly for a moment, before giving the subtlest of nods.  "Show me," she said quietly.

 

Okazaki paused for a moment before nodding.  He pulled out his PDA, sat it on the table, and let the hologram do its work.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki watched Past’s last drone as he whirled around, looking first at the nuclear weapons encircling him, then at Okazaki himself.

 

He sneered at Okazaki.

 

Okazaki remembered that he'd been attempting to look at least somewhat dignified as he faced his death.  He now realized, however, that he had looked more constipated than anything.  Suddenly, that sigh he'd seen himself give at this last meeting made all too much sense.

 

"So.  That really is your true face, then?" asked Past in Japanese.

 

"Something of the sort," Okazaki said in English.

 

Past snorted.  "Well, get it over with, then.  I hate being made to wait."

 

"How about a little spot of sport before dying, dear boy?" Okazaki said, reciting from memory.

 

"...Heh."  Past smirked slightly.  "You're a fan of old shows, aren't you?"

 

Okazaki shrugged.  "Again, something of the sort."

 

Past snorted again.  "Well.  Can't say as I rightly mind."  He fixed Okazaki with a grim stare.  "I have to ask, though.  How many did you eat?"

 

"Minds?  Well."  Okazaki smirked slightly.  "Maybe you'll find out, in the next life."

 

"Cute."  Past sighed.  "...Take care of them, alright?  They... need you, now."

 

"They?"

 

"Humanity," Past said as he crossed his arms.

 

"Technically," Okazaki noted with a small, bitterly amused smile, "you're human too."

 

"No," Past said with a shake of his head.  "I gave that up, not long after this all began.  Much like yourself, I suspect."

 

"Yes."

 

"Heh."

 

"Humanity has no use for our kind," Okazaki intoned.

 

"...Heh.  Yeah."  Past looked down and to the side for a moment.  "Perhaps you're right.  Nevertheless.  Please, try.  You can't do any worse than I have."

 

"On that, we are in complete agreement," Okazaki said with a nod.  "Now then."

 

"Now then."

 

Okazaki widened his stance ever so slightly.  "Time for the last dance."

 

Past mirrored the stance.  "You lead."

 

\----0----

 

Melee combat between two cyborgs was, by nature, an incredibly brutal affair.  What made it that way was their sheer durability, coupled with the ability to continue going in spite of injuries that would instantly kill even the toughest unaugmented human.  Even dismemberment was no obstacle, as long as overall mobility wasn't hindered.  And if the cyborgs were evenly matched, as these two were, the battle could take a surprisingly long time.

 

Okazaki looked on silently as Kotomi watched the fight on the monitor.  There was no reaction from her at all anymore, he noticed.  Not even as the fragment of himself fighting sheared off its right hand's fingers, bleeding away energy from the laser Past had fired.

 

That was another thing.  'Melee combat' was a misleading description, when both cyborgs inevitably had some sort of ranged weapon.

 

He idly wondered what she planned to do to him.  He could think of a few ways to approach the problem, some more effective than others.  Simply disabling his mind link would still leave him there, albeit fragmented.  That wouldn't kill him, but it would certainly be painful.  There was also possibly making his nanites think his brain cells were a foreign invader; that would fit Ushio's description of what happened to him, certainly.

 

His personal favorite was memory rewriting.  It could possibly do the trick effectively; if she did that, Kotomi would be in the position to take control of his emptied brains and use them to save the world in his stead.  It was the best outcome he could think of.

 

In rude parody of their first meeting, a shot to the legs with a .50 caliber internal weapon rendered Past unable to fight properly.  Okazaki remembered what had been on his mind, that close to death.  Relief.  One way or another, he had reached the end of his journey.  No more killing those who didn't deserve it.  No more mourning lost friends.  No more fighting a losing battle.

 

Rebirth had been a somewhat rude awakening.

 

"Do you have any last words?"  Okazaki asked, the voice synthesized by the now headless fragment.

 

"M-M-M-Merel-l-l-y to re-repeat my la-a-a-ast statem-m-m-ment," Past stammered, no longer able to properly control its own mind to machine interface.  "Take-take-take care-re of th-th-them."

 

"We'll see."  Okazaki leveled his arm at the shattered armor where his past self's final brain lay.  One resounding boom.

 

It was over.

 

\----0----

 

"There is no death, only a change of worlds," Okazaki said quietly before turning to Kotomi.  "Do you need me to do anything?"

 

She regarded him silently for a few moments, before a single tear rolled down her cheek, and she shook her head.  "No.  I already have access to your mental network."

 

"Ah.  Very good, then."  He looked down for a moment before meeting her eyes a last time.  "Kotomi chan....  I'm....  I'm so sorry."

 

She shook her head.  "I know."  A finger reached down, uncertainly for a moment, before pressing a single key on her keyboard.

 

Okazaki stopped moving.  Each form simply ceased whatever motion it was performing, joints, motors, muscles locked in place.

 

He mentally frowned.  _'Then she's not aiming to take me over.  Pity.'_

 

His eyes were stuck, facing forward.  He watched, unable to move, as Kotomi brought her hands up to her face.  It took him a too long moment to realize that she was sobbing.  Each pained cry was a knife in his heart.  _‘Kotomi...’_

 

Eventually, Kotomi ceased crying and laid her head on the table in front of her, blocking out the light with her arms.

 

Okazaki wished that he could go over to her, even knowing his presence wouldn’t have been wanted.  It pained him to see her cry.  As he thought about it, he realized he wasn’t sure what was worse.  Her cries, or her blank silence.

 

\----0----

 

Part of Okazaki continued to watch the crowd that had lived inside the base for the last two month.  The conditions, though crowded and lacking privacy, were comfortable.

 

His vision blurred for a moment, and he realized after a few too many moments that the crowd looked noticeably skinnier on the whole, and on the verge of rioting.

 

 _‘Oh.  Oh shit.  The doors are sealed.  They’re....  They’re trapped.’_ Mentally, he winced.  It wasn’t going to be pretty.

 

\----0----

 

What was more disturbing to Okazaki was the fact that, through the blur, Kotomi had not moved.  He was fairly sure she was still breathing, although he could no longer be certain.  She had become noticeably skinnier as well, and she had not been exactly thick to begin with.

 

 _‘Kotomi, please get up,’_ he pled.  _‘Get up, do something....  Don’t just....  Don’t just die, not like this....’_

 

She didn’t move.  His vision blurred once again, the mind virus altering his perception of time in unpredictable ways.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki had missed the riot.  But not its aftereffects.

 

It reminded him of documentaries of the holocaust.  Those still alive were but skin and bone.  Only a few remained; a detached part of him guessed they were probably the stronger and more ruthless.

 

He could easily tell how they had survived; the piles of bones were a dead giveaway.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki watched Kotomi.  Or what had been Kotomi, for it was clear she had passed on some time ago.  Numbly, his eyes traced her delicate bone structure, still in the same place she had sat down.

 

\----0----

 

A final blur of vision showed Okazaki the fate of the riot survivors.  The term was no longer applicable.

 

\----0----

 

For a long moment, Okazaki thought he had experienced a blur again.  His mind, addled by the brain destroying virus and the results of his actions, took far too long to realize the problem was that he could no longer see.

 

\----0----

 

In the darkness, he started to remember things.  Traces of battles fought and lost, memories of bloodshed at a scale difficult for those with but one mind to readily conceive.  In the end, all for nothing.  Just another Alexander the Great, Adolf Hitler, Genghis Khan, leaving a lasting bloodstain on history, but ultimately changing nothing.  The survivors, wherever they remained, would recover eventually, learn, then forget its lessons, and move on to the next would be conqueror.

 

All for nothing.

 

He could feel the connection to his machine parts slowly fading away.  It didn't matter.  Nothing he could do about it.

 

All for nothing.  His friends were all dead.  All for nothing.  His friends in his past life took it the easiest.  One moment fine, the next, meat paste.  All for nothing.  Fujibayashi was lucky as well.  Kyou wasn't.  All for nothing.  Tomoyo was consumed by rage and shot down.  All for nothing.  Furukawa simply died.  All for nothing.  Kotomi...  It was all for nothing.

 

And then there were all those he killed directly.  He remembered many.  Had seen them die.  He remembered in particular a young man, a soldier.  He had been part of a unit attacking his tanks.  All for nothing.  All that had been left after the sonic cannon was his upper body.  The rest of him a crushed pulp.

 

He continued to live on in spite of it.  He remembered looking down on the dying man, his nearly one ton bulk hunched over slightly to look at his face.  Pain twisted the man's visage, distorting it in ways it was not meant for.

 

Step.

 

He ended his suffering.  One smooth movement.

 

_'All͜ f͘or͢ n͟othi̸ng.͞'͢_

 

Numbness.  He had felt his body before.  It was gone now.  Parts of his mind were simply dying.  He could feel it.

 

_'I͡ ̴d̡o̴n'͏t ͘ẁa͜ņt͜ ͜t̸hi̡s.͢'̷_

He remembered further back.  The first time he had killed himself, biting and ripping and tearing at his own forms.  So much blood.  So much pain.  Pain turned into anger.  Fury and self-loathing boiled alongside, hatred of himself and his years of failure consuming his mind and his bodies in a maelstrom of self-destruction.

 

_'̨͜͠Ì͡ ̸̕͞͞d̵͠͠͡͝o͠n̵̕'̢̀̀͡͠t͡҉ ̶̨̛͝ẃ̷̸́͜a̴͟͏n͜͡͡͝t̵̷́͜ ̕͠t̴͟h͜͜i̷͏ś̕.̷͢͜͝'̢̡́͏_

 

Just slightly further back.  He remembered tearing the poor soldier's mind apart.  The first time he had eaten a mind.  He remembered the way the layers had peeled away, the way the man had dissolved into terror-ridden shards before being fully absorbed.  He wondered, idly, if that was comparable to what was happening to him.

 

_'I ̛don'̷t ̡wan̸t ͘this͝.̶ I d͢on̷'̴t͡!̴'̛_

 

Further back.  A lifetime of mediocrity.  Helping his mum eke out an increasingly bare existence.  Raging futilely at the status quo, knowing it would do no good.  Attending local protests, agreeing with internet posts, but not able to muster up the ability to truly care.  Empty years, watching the world slowly and surely slip into the depths of hell, without the energy to do more than nod at the latest 'change the world' scheme.

 

_'̨̥̱ͪͩI̦͇͍̥͍̙ͩͦ͌̚'̼̹̺ͥ̿͌͐ͪ̋̀m̤͓̐̏ͫ̂ͮ̾͑ ͫ́̿͑ͮ̾s̤̹̱̈́̐ỏ̴͇̪̺͒̅ ̡͇̥̺͈́̑̆ͫ̿̏͑t̙̳̝̩̒̓̅̄͌̀í̔͊̊̚r̝̲̦̒̽̚e̙͙͚̰̿̑͋͒̄̅͡ḏ̬͚̼͓̐̓̇̍̐͟.̗̦̟̙͍͊̇͋̈́̐ͯ͞'̻̳̠ͬ̔̊́̽̈͜_

 

And back.  College crushed him in a lot of ways.  Left him with crippling debts.  Without true hope for the future.  He went in with some degree of optimistic, wanting to change the world.  To bring an end to suffering.  Maybe go down in the history books.  Came out the other end hoping to at least find some temporary relief before he died.  Not quite broken.  Still had hope, in the back of his mind.  A hope barely kept alive as a pipe dream.

 

_'̩̼̠̟͖͖ͪ̀I̧͎̾ ̨̫̞͓͉̪̱̖͚̭͗͆ͩͩ́̑̆͗̀j͈̖̝̈́̅ủ͌̔̆͏̧̲̜̣̥s̺̖̹̜͒ͭ͋͋̃̔ͫ́̀́t͚͙̮̲̗͊ͧͨ̀́ ̢̝̭͕͈̥͓͍̹ͦ̂̌̐ͯ͡w̡͙͙̑̽͑͂a̶̘̝̮̜̭̻̣̔̓̽̎ͫ̃̚n̮̩̭̱͉̹ͥͮͫ̆̂͟t̩͚͍̜̯͕̣̟͙ͬ̿́ ̷̫ͦͮ͟t̡̖̻̽̊̇ͩ̑͋̄̚͘ͅơ̅͛͞҉͚̣͈̪̖̦ ̖̼̝̩ͨ̔͂ͨ́ͅr̸̶̦̟̳ͣ͐̒̆̅̎̆ͅë͔͔̼͉̞́ͮ́͠ŝ̬͖̯ͧ́t̝̮͙̣̋ͫ͋̋̈̃̍̒.͈̒̅͗ͪ̈̂̋͛̂.̧̢̤̣̀ͯ̒ͬ̄ͅ.̺̬͓̟̹̱̈̔̈̾̿̂̃̆'̶̥͖̱͂ͦ͒͋_

 

Back.  High school.  So much rage.  Fights.  Disdain for authority.  Typical teenager hormones.  Atypical interests.  Errant insults only added to the fury.  Occasionally snapped.  Temporarily quieted the voices.  Learned that force would quell dissent.

 

_,¡sıɥʇ ʇdǝɔɔɐ oʇ ǝsnɟǝɹ I  ¡oN,_

 

Further.  Middle school.  Bad neighborhood.  Got in fights.  Some lost.  Some won.  Fond memory.  Riding bike.  Get kicked into wall.  Get back up, circle block.  Punch kid who kicked him.  Starts fight.  Picks kid up, tosses them on bike.  He goes crying for his uncle.  Him and three others surround him next day.  Get glasses knocked off.  Rush kid for them.  They all back off.  Glorious feeling of power.

 

_'̃̔ͩ́̓I͙̣͖̠ͫ͌͆̂ͣͬ̆ ̘̠ͭ͒̏M͖̝̻̓͑ͭ͗U̙̟͖̼͈̚S̩̼̿ͣ͌T̘̝̀̉̀ ̙͍͖̻ͭR̫̟͔̮̥͕ͮͅE͖̗̲̦͉̩̥͋̓ͭͯ̏S̘̭̓̔̿͗͆Ỉ̮̼͍̟̎̓̏̽̚S̰̞̲̩̬͇ͩ̎̀̃T̠͕͔̥̝̺͛ͦͨ̈ͦ̍!̦̈́̾ͪ̄ͬ'̞̤͕̗͍̳̋͋̾͋̽͑_

 

Earliest memories.  Kindergarten.  Made to recite pledge of allegiance.  Resented it.  Even then, did not like being told what to do.  Rage.  Ignored teachers for most.  Frequently sent home with notes from teacher.  Didn't care.

 

_͓̪̗͉̀͑̋̈́̎̄͞,̗̟͝˙̗̿͒̏͑͂̓ͭ˙̜͖͚҉˙̪̩͙͙̲̘́́̒̅̒̆̇ƃ͇̹̩̮̝̋̑̍̑̏ͪ̌u̱̬̻̮̲ͫͪ͗͜ı̲̬̏ͬo͒ͯ̓̇ͭƃ̠̜̬͕̐̅̾̉̏̑̂͘ ̭̻̯̥̰ͮ̇̾s̤͙͒̽ͮ̚,̢̥̓͑ͮ̆ͯʇ̢̿ͣ̐̌ͬͦÍ̧͚̪̭͚̠ͣͅ ͆͋ͫ̃̊͜ ͂͌̄ͩ˙̠̙̫̼̘̻͚҉͂ͥ̿͗˙̷͉̯̬̈́̌̇̆̇͂͂ͅͅ˙̤͉̟͖̞ͣ̑o̞͕͇̬̳̎N̸̪̪͆ ̴̠́̎͋ ̶̞͉̦͌̄͒͛˙̟̇o̞̗͚̮͕̐͒͊̃ͮ̚͠N͋̾ ͓̰̪ͫ͆̍ͭ̇̾͌ͅ ̢̩͈͇͚̤̪ͣ¡̠̩̘̲̼͖ͯ̉̐ͭͤo͖͉̮͎̜̺̞ͪ̊ͦ̾ͩ͗͐͜N̵̰̤̝̂ͤͪͬ̂̒ͨ,_

 

Fragments.  memory.  slipping away

 

f͞orgo͜t̨te͝n s̀omet҉h̵i̷ng̸  
  
į d͜ǫnt ͟w͟a̡nt t͢his

  
i͝ dont ̴w͟ánt͞ ̷th͜is

 

ị̞͇͇͔͌̋̋͋́ ̻̩̲͈͇͈̞ͦ̓ͯ́d̷̳̱͔̫͗ͦ͊̈́ͫ͆ͥơ̱̥͉͇̹̖̞̔ͧ̓͂ͮ̏n̨̲̻͚̘̦͍ͯ͑ͥ̐̌̉ͦͅt̵ ̖͍̟̩͈̠̯͗w̩̭͓̩̅ͧͪ͒̒̋a̮̤̞̻̮͕ͨ̇̄͒̈́̚n̸͍̖ͫ̅́͊t̞͙̣̟̹ ̠͉̅̏̓̌ͨťͯ̔̾͏̘̣̣̪̰ḫ̤̜ͬ͋͠i̭͉̇̍̇s̩͂̽̌ͦ̀̚  
̓̎̿̂͐̅̓͠  
̠̼͓̭̺͖̂ͭ͊̇̉ḭ̼̲̮̥̎͋̄̊̉̐͟d͖̞̗͈ͦͯͣ͂͛̀̚o̫̪͚̠̰̍̌ͦͦ̀́ͅn̜ͪ́̚ͅt͞w͓̃̔̈́̾̕a̽̓ͤ͊̄͏̗̮͍̤̲̺n̶̬̟͇̼͔t̨͎̮͙̫͉̲͗́̃͐̎̐t̞̩̠̤ͪ͌̒ͭ̏͜h̛̺̪͉̟͓͖̓͂i̛͍͈̓̆ș̫ͤ̕î̜͎̟̐d̻̻̫̬̠̮̖͒͛̓ͮͣ͘o͖̠̻̙͎ͧn̘̄͊̇͂͊t͓̱͎̲̅͑̓w̓͗͆͑ͤͧ҉̗̯̥à̔ͭ͠n̽̔̍̐t̲͉̙̻̽̿t̎͛ͫ͏̭̖̭h̛̻̬̜ͨ͗ͦ̅i͇͜s̮ͣ̆̅i̶̖̲͍̗͇̪̰͊ͫ̊̀̅ͨ̚dͭͭö͉̺̭̟̰n̻̪̭̠ͩͭ̂̊ͯ͜t̵̐̅͐̎̇ͤͩw̵͇͔͆a̜̯̲ͮͦ̇ͮ̌n̶̟̭͉͇ͤ̾͌ť̟̱͈ͫ̅̅̓̔t̼͕̹̜͉̳͇̄̈́̒́h̤̖̼̄̇̑͒̋́i͖̣̦̫̲̝̥ͣͦ̃̔̌s̝̺̹̬͂͟

 

̫̮̟͕͖̲͙̪̫̱̱̀͗̀ͧ͛̆ͨͦ̆̂͊͑̾ͤ̆̋̂̏̚͢ ͔̩̣̯͇͉ͦ̈́̔̾̎̓͌̚ͅp̼̞̹̦̙̪͇̔̿́ͮ̍͌͋ı̭̭̳͈̰̽̿ͥ̀̊͑͐ɐ̪̭̰͕̜͍͇̠̻̤̹̱̻̣͆̒ͫ̄̍ͦ̍ͥͅɹ̮͎̳̼͍̳̜̤͉̣̜ͬ̓ͣͭ͗ɟ̯̗̬͍̺̲̗͊̈͂ͧ͊ͮͣ́ɐ̼̙̞͎̻̼͔̮̟̫̤̘̱̃̇ͫͬ̇ͩ̇ͮͫ̓̏̉ ̝̼͖̘̱͓͎̩͖̫̯̺̠͓̪͑̊ͤ͆̐̄͆̔̿ɯ̭͎̟̦̖̝͈̻͎͉͓͖͍ͭ͂̇̆̇́̏̚ͅı

 

[DISCONTINUITY]

 

\----0----

 

"Welcome back."

 

End Act Three

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A Note From The Author:**

 

So... uhm, yeah.  You know how I said there would be just three acts?  ...  I may have lied a little.

 

Anyway, here we are.  Everybody’s dead, Dave.  And this gods forsaken act is over.  I don’t mind telling you guys, I _hated_ writing this arc.  It’s not even Clannad anymore, it’s... this.  Whatever _this_ is, exactly.

 

The good news is, things should get... somewhat lighter, here on in.  At the least, they won’t get any darker.  And we may even see a return to... some canon elements, anyway.  Well, it’ll be recognizable for a bit, leastways.

 

...

 

Of course, if you’re still reading at this point, I guess you won’t be too bothered where I take things.  Can’t get much further from things than I already have, after all.  So hey!  Keep calm and read on.

 

Now, for the ~~bad news~~ ~~good news~~ ~~bad news~~ some news.  There’s a fair chance that after the next two chapters, I’ll have to take a hiatus.  Reason being, the change I made in the next chapter set had some rather far reaching implications, or at least necessitated a whole steaming heap of change, which has taken a lot of time, which I am no longer guaranteed to have with the new semester already underway.

 

So yeah.  May have to go on hiatus.  Depends on how bad my coursework gets.  I mean, so far so good, but it could spike rather easily, and I won’t be able to get much work done if it does.  On the other hand, I already have the next chapter set finished, so that’s good.  Best case scenario is that I still update on October 1, and keep on as I have been.  Worst case scenario, I still update September 1 and 15, and don’t update again until January 1.

 

So yeah.

 

_Stay classy, ~~New Vegas~~ AO3._


	33. A Critical Examination Of The Self, Part 1

**A Note From The Author:**

 

You may or may not have noticed that this is a few days late.  Well, as it turns out, my ISP rather dropped the ball, so I haven’t had internet in the better part of a week.  Plus side, I now have it again, so hey!  Have some story.  :)

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

Act Four:  An End To All Things

 

That which was once Okazaki regarded the girl who stood before him with confused curiosity.  _'I... recognize her.  Who...  Ushio, wasn't it?  Yes.  That's her name.  Ushio.  Damn, I can't seem to remember anything else...  No, no, something else...  Yes.'_

 

He remembered what her presence meant.  He was dead.  Again.  For the second time in a long existence he was dead again.  _'How long an existence?'_   It seemed to span back forever, but the details were muddled; a whirling maelstrom of images, disjointed from one another.  The occasional whisper of a half-formed memory resounded in his mind.  _'How had that happened?'_   He tried to focus his thoughts.

 

 _'Better question.  How do I know that means I'm dead?'_   Memories started reforming as he contemplated the issue _.  'Ah, yes.  Because I promised I would not return.  Why did I do that?  Because... she messed with my mind?  Yes, but....  No, there's more, happened after....  I hate her, I think.  Why?  Because....'_

 

He regarded the waifish figure before him, both of them inside her infernal cabin once more.

 

_'...That's right.  She killed Fujibayashi.  And Tamafuki.  Who....  Yes.  Kyou's sister and Tomoyo's brother, respectively.  Drove Tomoyo to a rage that got her killed.  Didn't she?  I wasn't positive, just suspected....'_

 

"Are you going to say something?" Ushio asked, breaking his reverie.

 

He considered her thoughtfully.  _'What did she do....  Messed with my mind....  Messed with Kotomi's mind....  Kotomi.  Yes, I remember Kotomi.  She... was broken.  Ever since Fujibayashi died.  Did... something?  Yes.  I was thinking she did something... would do something....  Argh, damn it, why isn't it all coming together?'_

 

"Ah....  Ah, yes.  I remember," Ushio said.  "We both were confused when I did this to you.  Took us both some time to piece it together.  Take your time.  There is more than enough here."

 

_'That's right, she said she did something like this to... me?  No, not me, another me.  Another universe.  And Kotomi did this?  That seems right, yes.  Why would she....  Because I killed her other friends.  That's right.  Except that might have been Ushio.  I'll have to ask her, when I get my mind sorted.  Minds?  Yes.  We were distributed.  Many brains, one mind.  How did I forget-  Ah yes.  Kotomi, again.'_

 

An image of her flickered through his mind, a bright smile on her face.  Flash.  Dead eyes and no smile.

 

 _'I did that to her,'_ he reflected.  _'Or at the least, I would have been willing to.  Why?  Oh.  Paradox.  We wanted to stop a paradox.  Needed to, we thought.  Wanted....  Didn't.  That much I am certain is Ushio's fault.  I... don't think I could do that to Kotomi again.  Not even for the sake of the universe.  Seeing her die inside like that once was enough... and... something else?  What....'_

 

The image of Kotomi's still form, shrinking into a corpse seemingly far too quickly as the mind-virus worked on his perceptions flashed through his mind, and he forced it away.

 

_'Oh gods.  Yes.  She died.  After infecting me with the virus.  I think it must have been grief that killed her....'_

 

He mentally frowned.

 

 _'Gee, you think so?  Think it was grief?  No, I'm sure it was because she was_ just such a happy-go-lucky person.  What the fuck did you think would happen, if she went and killed her once best friend like that, huh?'

 

He metaphorically took a deep breath, clearing his mind for a moment.

 

_'Related note.  Furukawa also died of grief, I think.  Her body probably couldn't handle it.  That's what Akio said, right?  Yeah.  Something like that.  Ryota said something similar about Kyou, but she didn't die.  Not physically anyway.  Her mind just broke, left her almost mercifully rather than leaving her still tormented.  Unlike Kotomi.  She still continued on in spite of it.  She always was a strong girl like that, wasn't she?'_

 

That which was once Okazaki could feel the parts beginning to snap into place.  Memories were beginning to re-form without his input, thoughts and emotions beginning to properly return to his soul.

 

Along with extra memories that he knew he hadn't possessed when he had augmented himself a second time as Okazaki.  There was no denying that they were his memories, however.  Memories of a time shortly after he had been killed by his future self, though he hadn't know that at the time.

 

Thousands of years' worth of memories.  Ushio had been right; it had taken him a very long time to figure out how to speak in this strange realm of hers.  It had taken him decades to learn a way to communicate his second time around, in a crude fashion.  That was because Ushio had told him how he had done it the first time.  Like many such shortcuts, it got him there fast, but at the expense of all the other things he had learned in his attempt.

 

Small wonder she had thought his second attempt to be a pale shadow of what he once could do. _'And what did we talk about, I wonder?  Let's see....'_  He thought back.

 

\----0----

 

_"Welcome back," the girl that ran the strange realm he assumed to be the afterlife said._

_"Thank you," he signed, stretching himself out to form the letters, thinning himself out almost to invisibility for the spaces.  He wasn't sure how long it had taken him to learn to speak as he did.  Time in that realm was difficult to keep track of; the sky never changed, and it seemed impossible to become bored.  Particularly if one was focusing on a task.  Even so, he knew it had been a very long time.  Longer than he had spent alive, at least by three orders of magnitude._

_It had been a side project of his as he learned how to talk again.  Simply letting a fraction of himself count.  Starting at one, and adding one about once every second.  Simple task, helped to exercise his spirit.  By the time he had felt he had mastered his form, the count had almost a trillion; after doing some quick calculations, equivalent to a period of time of roughly thirty thousand years, give or take a few hundred for inaccurate timekeeping._

_It was a frightening amount of time, but that wasn't what bothered him the most about it.  He wasn't sure what scared him the most.  That it had taken him that long, that he hadn't even grown bored through the duration, or that he didn't feel any different than he had before he started._ 'Strange realm,' _he decided._

_"Now that you can speak, I think it's time we had a little discussion," the girl said._

_"Very well," he replied.  "How about starting with whom exactly it was that killed me?"_

_"You'll find out."  She smirked.  "Either way, it's for me to ask the questions and you to answer."_

_"...I don't do well with such dictates."_

_"Regardless."_

_"I would tell you to sod off, but there doesn't appear to be much else to do around these parts.  So ask your questions, and I will decide whether or not to answer."_

_The girl smiled slightly, a smile that didn't reach her eyes.  "Good enough.  What would you do with a second chance?"_

_"A second chance?"_

_"To live again."_

_"...Hm."_ 'Not screw everything up?  Maybe do what we should have done at the outset?  We'd still have to keep a military of sorts just because things have the chance to get messy, but....  Hm.  Not first again.  I will not be the aggressor again.  Defense is one thing, but that....  I deserved what I got for that.' _"I guess I would not make the mistakes that I made.  Try to do things peacefully, if I could."_

_"If you could.  Implies you might still continue fighting."_

_"I wouldn't start it, but I would damn well finish it.  I still have a vested interest in seeing the world happier than it was."_

_She frowned.  "Because you were doing such a good job of it."_

_"Well, if that... other hivemind hadn't have attacked me, I... probably wouldn't have done so well with that method either.  No.  I'm not too proud to admit I screwed up fierce, trying to do things by force.  Even if the ends justify the means, there's usually a better way."_

_She nodded.  "Good.  Good answer.  Maybe there's hope for you yet."_

_"Gee, thanks for that vote of confidence."_

_"You're welcome," she said, without a trace of irony._

_"So having answered a question, why don't you answer one for me?  Who are you?"_

_"You may call me Ushio.  Now then.  It's time for you to go."_

_"Go?  What do-"_

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki's memories of the realm stopped there, replaced with the flashes of diffuse light and sound he associated with his infantile years.  A few more memories, half remembered dreams brought back into clarity, of her watching him, sending petty hexes at him, tormenting him while he couldn't escape.  Most of his memories he had of her while he was alive were from that time.  Memories of a woman who's very presence pained him.

 

 _'Well,'_ he reflected.  _'That answers that much, anyway.'_   He contemplated Ushio again _.  'So.  She must have expected that to mean that I would have stopped my past self.  Or else what she said to me the second time I was here wouldn't make sense.  Why?  Supposedly, she's seen how this goes.  She should have known.  And... everything else.  Damn it all.  Let's just ask her.  Get it over with.'_

 

"Ushio," he signed, the name fully formed of his spiritual material.

 

"I see you've regained your faculties," Ushio replied.  "And your skills."

 

"So it would seem."

 

"So how was your trip?"

 

"...Hmph.  You have to ask?  Ms. 'I can see both sides?'"

 

An amused smile crossed her face for a moment, and then vanished.  "You seem bitter."

 

"No.  You don't say.  What a startling revelation."

 

Ushio smiled slightly, one that stayed.  "Just making small talk.  There's no need to take that tone with me."

 

"Then I will just cut to the chase.  Why did you think there was any doubt that I would do what I did?"

 

She closed her eyes and sighed.  "I didn't."

 

If he had eyes, he would have blinked.  "You didn't?"

 

"That's right," she said as she looked at him with a frown.  "I knew you would do exactly what you did."

 

"Then... why did you try to dissuade me from doing it?"

 

Ushio shrugged.  "Honestly?  Just a wish.  To achieve the right path, I had to do a number of things I didn't really wish to do."

 

 _'Here it comes....'_   "Explain that to me."

 

"I created a paradox."

 

"That's it?"

 

She looked at him silently, emotionlessly.

 

"That's not it," he signed after a few moments, "is it?  I know you've been interfering with events, you said as much yourself."

 

"Yes."

 

"So I have to wonder...  Fujibayashi...  It's exceedingly unlikely that shards of glass could line up like that."

 

She raised an eyebrow.  "And what are you implying?"

 

"Did you kill Fujibayashi?"

 

"You killed Fujibayashi," Ushio stated with a neutral expression.  "It was your actions that caused that fight, your very own finger was on the trigger of the weapon."

 

"I don't buy that," Okazaki replied.

 

"That doesn't matter," she said, her face unchanging.

 

"Fine.  How about Tomoyo?  I know you have the power to enhance an emotion.  The urge to kill me, after Tamafuki died?  I also know you can make a group of people not look in a certain direction.  I don't know where Tomoyo got her weapons, but it couldn't be legally, not in Japan."

 

"And?"  Ushio's head tilted back slightly.

 

"And, she was shot to death by the police.  Right in front of me, I might add."

 

"You bring that side out in people," she said, allowing a smirk to grace her face.  "Have you considered maybe she just got lucky with the weapons?"

 

"I buy that even less," Okazaki replied.

 

"And that matters even less," she said as her face returned to its neutral expression.

 

"Fine then.  Again, how about Tomoyo?  She almost caused a paradox.  I had to eat minds just to be sure what she did wouldn't cause one.  Not that it did any good in the end, of course.  Still, I could have done something about her if the fact she might have done that hadn't slipped my mind.  Perhaps she might have lived that way, at least."

 

Ushio shrugged slightly.  "Don't blame me for that slipping your mind."

 

"I buy that least of all."

 

"And that also matters least of all," she said with another shrug.  "Do you have any other examples you wish to cite?"

 

"You know, no.  I don't.  I'm going.  I won't be returning here."

 

"You can't leave this realm."

 

"No, but I can try and see if it has an edge."

 

"...I see."  Ushio looked at him for a moment, and then looked at the ground with a sigh.  "Very well.  I did do all of that.  Except for your not thinking about Tomoyo causing a paradox.  You legitimately just didn't think about that until it was too late."

 

Okazaki took a moment to respond, alternatively battling confusion and rage in his mind.  "It's nice to see you so forthcoming."

 

"You were going to find out anyway," she observed with a sad smile.

 

"I'm not going to even ask.  I don't want to know right now.  I want you to know something instead.  When you killed Fujibayashi, you destroyed everything.  Kyou lost her mind.  Furukawa went into a coma, then died.  Kotomi...."

 

Ushio looked to the side for a moment, and then sighed.  "...I know."

 

He paused.  Something bothered him about the way she replied.  "Then why?  Why did you do it?"

 

"There are several reasons."  Ushio pulled over a chair and sat down in front of him.  As he watched, she seemed to sag inward, as though she had lost all of her energy.  "They were my friends and family growing up, you know."

 

A long moment passed, and finally Okazaki realized she wasn't going to continue.  "...And you went and killed them, then?"

 

She glared at him.  "No.  You did that."

 

"I did no such thing."

 

A small, bitter smile wormed its way onto her face.  "Oh, yes.  You did.  Both directly, and...."

 

"And?"

 

"You corrupt everything you touch, you know.  Without fail.  You corrupted the technology, you corrupted Kotomi, and you corrupted me."  Her countenance, for a bare instant, rippled, and for a moment he thought he saw something familiar, the ghost of a face he had seen many times before in a mirror.  The face of Past.

 

"What the...?"

 

"The other you left a fragment of himself in me....  It would have taken me over in time, if I hadn't have brought back Kotomi's mind virus."  Ushio paused to rub her eyes wearily.  "Even still, there was some measure of blending.  And he... has a lot of experience making a mind do his bidding.  He even drove father away through me."

 

Okazaki realized he hadn't, in fact, seen the garbage robot around.  Until that point, he hadn't thought about it, however.  Something else bothered him about what she had said, though.  "...Has.  Present tense."  As he signed the words, he realized how stupid they were.  He had just seen for himself, for an instant, the truth of her condition.

 

"Yes.  Even now he lurks in the background, watching...."  She blinked.  "It's been a long time since I've been able to speak this clearly without him making me do something."

 

"...Heh.  This is funny."  Of course.  It all made sense to him now.

 

Her glare returned.  "I don't find it amusing, myself."

 

"No, you DONT understand  Of couRSE IT WOULD Be like this.  I am my OWN WORST ENEMY AFTER ALL]  He could only barely contain his emotions, which interfered with his ability to fluidly sign.  He wasn't sure if he wanted to laugh, cry, or both.  It was his fault.  It had always been his fault.  There genuinely was no one to blame but himself.

 

The face of his other self quietly replaced Ushio's with a ripple.  "That's right.  I can't say I was happy about it, but I do what must be done."

 

[YOU] Okazaki signed as he focused on the aberration before him.

 

"Yes, me."  His other self smirked.  "Get control of yourself.  We will not make progress this way."

 

A tendril of Okazaki's soulstuff lashed out at the Other.  It passed through him without any sign of resistance.

 

The Other shook his head with an amused smile.  "That will not work.  Calm your rage.  It's the only way we will get through this."

 

Okazaki sent another tendril.  Than another.  Finally he moved forward and engulfed the Other, in a futile attempt to cause any sort of damage to him.

 

The Other tapped his foot slowly, and raised an eyebrow.

 

Okazaki continued to try and smash at him.  Distantly, the rational part of his psyche realized that he was having no effect on the Other, but was having a difficult time reeling his emotions in.

 

"If you are quite through," the Other said after this had gone on for a few minutes.

 

Slowly, Okazaki began to regain his senses, spurred on by his rationality continuing to pull at and cool his emotions.  Eventually, and with considerable difficulty, he pulled his form away from the Other, and considered him thoughtfully.

 

"Right, then."  The Other leaned back in Ushio's chair.  "I suppose I should explain a few things, then."

 

[I AM LISTENING] signed Okazaki, nearly calm enough to properly form his letters.  [BE QUICK about it."

 

The Other's eyes narrowed briefly at Okazaki, before he smirked.  "Heh.  As you wish.  I made Ushio do those things for the rather good reason of not causing a paradox."

 

"...She made a paradox, though."

 

"I let her do that," the Other replied with an amused snort.  "Knew it would jolt you out of your complacency."

 

"But she still created a paradox."

 

"A trivial matter, and a trivial paradox," the Other said with an irreverent wave of Ushio's hand.  "Completely irrelevant, within intertwined strands of multiverses."

 

Okazaki considered this for a few minutes, as the Other watched on silently.  "Let me see if I get this part straight.  She caused a paradox, but because there are multiple universes, this... is accounted for?"

 

The Other nodded.  "Not exactly right, but close enough for government work.  I saw your thoughts shortly after the paradox event.  You're right.  Those memories do have to come from somewhere.  Yes, another version of you will be wondering why the JSDF didn't follow suicidal attack orders."

 

"...Well that... explains... ...absolutely nothing!  If a paradox wasn't an issue, then why?  Why did you kill them?"

 

"It would have been a causality paradox if you hadn't have fought your past self, yes," the Other agreed with a frown.  "And really, the universe would have done just fine probably, if they had remained alive."

 

"Then.  Why."

 

"Kotomi's mind-eating virus....  It had to come from somewhere, did it not?"  The Other smirked at Okazaki.

 

Okazaki pondered this for a few moments, the implications of that statement slowly filtering through his mind.  "But...."

 

The Other shrugged.  "Yes, it violates traditional causality.  This is the multiverse.  Most such temporal rules do not apply."

 

"...So... you needed the mind-eating virus to defeat me... but..."

 

"Yes.  It's a paradox.  It's also a paradox if I didn't.  Curious effect, is it not?"

 

"Ungh."  He tried to work out the threads involved.  To get the mind-eating virus, Ushio would need to bend a reality in on itself.  But in order to bend reality in on itself, she needed to be properly dead?  And to be properly dead, she had to unleash the mind-eating virus on him before the Other could simply absorb her....

 

Causality paradoxes were a bitch.

 

"I'm getting a headache," Okazaki admitted.  "This is doubly impressive, as I don't actually have a head at the moment."

 

"Then go get some fresh air," the Other said as he gestured to the door with Ushio's hand.  "There's time here.  Time enough for anyone."

 

Okazaki didn't reply, and instead silently hovered out.


	34. A Critical Examination Of The Self, Part 2

The spirit of Okazaki hovered outside the door of Ushio's hut, and contemplated what the Other him had told him.

 

 _'They had to create a paradox to prevent a greater paradox of causality....'_  The more he thought about it, the more that part made sense to him.  He'd grown up on science fiction and works involving time travel; the implications still bothered him, but he could at least come to terms with the end result.

 

Coming to terms with what the Other had done came naturally, given that context.  He had labored to a similar end ever since he had been reborn as Okazaki.  Temporal paradoxes were not to be trifled with, as there was no way to know the end result; universal destruction was always an option.

 

And he had done so callously.  He had known billions would die.  And he had let them.  The alternative, in his mind, had been worse.  He had known the cost, and accepted it.  Whatever survivors of his influence had been left would have to deal with the loss of friends, family, and the vast majority of humanity.  He experienced a taste of this when his own friends died.

 

It had been all for nothing, of course.  A paradox had happened.  But the multiverse was real, and accounted for this.  Another paradox was prevented.  With callousness equal to his own, the other him had sent his friends to their deaths.  Had sent Kotomi to her death.

 

He tried, desperately, to blame the Other, to cast himself as the moral victor, and realized that there was nothing different about what they had done at all.  Except that rather than doing it to impersonal masses of humanity, the Other had done it to Okazaki.

 

He had to admit, there was a certain symmetry about it.

 

As he reflected on it further, even his death had symmetry.  As he had destroyed the minds of so many, leaving to die in terror, so too did he succumb to terror as his mind fell apart.  It was fitting, really.

 

He felt like he was missing something, however.  The more he thought about it, the more perturbed he became.

 

Why did it have to be Kotomi?  She was deathly bright, and had direct access to his brains, but that didn't make it impossible for someone in another universe to develop the mind-eating virus.  Couldn't the death of his friends have been prevented?  Couldn't Kotomi have lived on, able to face the horror of what he had done with the help of her friends?

 

 _'I suppose I now have a question to put to my other self,'_ Okazaki decided.  _'I can't believe he wouldn't have thought of that.  Why then, would he have needed it from Kotomi?  I don't believe he would do this pointlessly.  I just can't.'_

 

His form rippled with a sigh.  _'And then what?  Let's say there was a point?  Can we really forgive him for that?  I can't say I wouldn't have done the same, if the stakes were high enough.  And what if there was no point?  I can't believe I would do something so vile without reason.  I'm not the kind to kick dogs because they're there.  At least I don't think.  Ushio said he had slowly gone mad...'_

 

He sighed again _.  'I'm not going to find out just sitting... floating, out here.'_ He focused on the sky, and took in the serene, bluer than blue hue.  _'In there is... truth.  I'm not sure I'm ready to face that.  What I am under everything.'_

 

With a last sigh, he slowly turned his focus toward the door.  It was an excuse.  He already knew what he was.  It was too late for him to hide from that, and it had been ever since he had first taken another mind.  In the end, he was someone who would sacrifice anything to do what he thought was necessary.  Friends, family, even his own humanity.

 

Or at least, he had been.  He wasn't sure he could still do so.  After seeing how thoroughly his actions had destroyed everything, after having sacrificed anything that had any meaning to him, all for no purpose whatsoever....  He wasn't sure he had it in him, to do such ever again.

 

And maybe, Okazaki mused as he floated into the door, just maybe that was a good thing.

 

\----0----

 

"You're back," said Ushio.

 

Okazaki, if he'd had eyes, would have blinked.  "You look... unwell," he said, an understatement of epic proportions.  Ushio looked like someone who had gone ten rounds with the sandman, came out victorious, and had retroactively paid the price of restless nights for the past twenty years.

 

A small smile wormed its way onto her face as she sat forward in her chair.  "I had some time to think.  Without the other you interfering with my thoughts, I mean."  The smile faltered.  "I'm not sure I like what I was thinking."

 

 _'All that from some thinking?'_ he wondered.  "Do I want to know?"

 

"You'll find out in time," she said, before resting her hands on her knees.  "If everything goes according to his plan... and they usually do."  Her eyes turned to the ground on saying that.

 

"Considering what his plans have been thus far, I'm not sure that's a good thing," Okazaki said.

 

Ushio chuckled sadly.  "He believes it was for your own good, you know."

 

"My own good.  How could...."  His thoughts from shortly before came back to him.

 

"Hn.  Yes," came the voice of the Other, briefly overlapping with Ushio's.  "Your own good.  Shall I explain?"

 

"...I would love to hear you explain this travesty, yes," Okazaki admitted as he focused on the Other's smirking face.

 

"First, let me outline my little plan," the Other said, and waved Ushio's hand with a flourish.  "You and I, and as a result Ushio, will merge, after a fashion.  In this way, you will gain our knowledge, and our, shall we say... spiritual strength?  You will need both of these."

 

"I assume I get a say in the matter," Okazaki replied.  "If not, I refuse on principle."

 

"Of course you get a say," said the Other as his smirk grew wider.  "But I do not believe you will refuse.  More on that in a bit.  First though, as to why I did this to you."  He tented his fingers under his chin.  "In my life, I got... further, than you.  Took many more brains, gained that much more knowledge.  My ability to process and create ideas grew exponentially.  I had achieved, well, a sort of technological singularity, if you will."

 

"At the price of millions of unwilling minds making up your core," observed Okazaki.

 

"Oh, yes," the Other said, smirk unperturbed.  "It was as like being a god.  Nothing, and I mean nothing, was out of reach.  All it would take was a modicum of time.  I had just barely achieved this when I absorbed Ushio and, well.  The rest is history, as the saying goes.  All of that knowledge, all of that potential power... ripped from me, along with life, almost as soon as I had achieved it."

 

"My hearts bleed for you, they really do," said Okazaki.  "I do hope you're going to go somewhere with this."

 

The Other laughed.  "Oh, yes.  I am indeed going somewhere with this.  You see, the knowledge I have locked away in my being....  It is so very dangerous.  Nothing and no one would be safe, if it were put into the wrong hands."  The smirk fell off his face at last.  "As to where I am going with this.  There are two reasons."

 

"Two?"  The edges of Okazaki's form curled down into a frown.  "I assume one of these reasons is to produce the mind-eating virus?  If so, why did you not retrieve the virus from another universe?  I refuse to accept that Kotomi was, in all the so-called multiverse, the only one capable of doing so."

 

"You're right, on both stated counts," the Other said with a small smirk.  "That was one reason, yes.  And you're also right, at least I believe, about the mind-eating virus.  However, Ushio's vision only extends to this spur of the multiverse.  And in truth, this spur is, on the whole... rather small."

 

The Other raised Ushio's finger as like a professor explaining a point.  "You see, you think the universe is a big place-and it is-but it's just one among an infinity of other universes, each bound together by a common theme."

 

"And this theme is why you couldn't retrieve it from another universe?"

 

The Other nodded.  "Correct.  You see....  All fiction, all of it, is real.  Somewhere out there, there is an influence for each work of fiction ever made.  Either they already existed, and an author merely felt it out, in the way all sentient life seems to do, the so-called muse... or an author forced their will on the unrealized Platonic forms that lie between the universes, forcing a new reality into being."

 

He snorted.  "Naturally, given the nature of storytelling, a lot of these universes are unpleasant to be.  A good number have even been destroyed.  Even entire spurs, depending on how big a threat the villain might possibly be.  By the way, congratulations on making this particular spur rather unpleasant."

 

"...Assuming I believe any of that-"

 

"You will," the Other interrupted.  "When you merge with us, you will understand completely."

 

"Still not sold on that," Okazaki countered.  "Now.  Your other reason?"

 

"So impatient," the Other said with a shake of his head.  "Very well, then.  I was testing you."

 

A long pause ensued, as Okazaki absorbed this information.

 

"You....  You were TESTING me?!?"  He had to resist the urge to uselessly try to tear at the Other again.  "You killed everyone I knew, everyone I cared for, to _test_ me?!"

 

"That's right," the Other said calmly.  "To test you."

 

Okazaki contorted in ways not consistent with Euclidian geometry as he continued to absorb the information.  After another long silence, he finally was able to shakily form a single word.  [WHY]

 

"Because you needed to experience loss.  True loss."  The Other smirked.  "As it turned out, not even your mother dying was enough to dissuade you from taking the path you took, from making the mistakes you made...."  He winced.  "The mistakes that I made.  No.  We ended up forgetting the human component.  Became so detached that we could do anything, mind-rape anyone, and not even feel it afterward."

 

The Other leaned back in his chair and sighed.  "Now though.  You will not forget this again.  You'll never forget this.  And you'll never make the same mistakes."  He snorted.  "Mind you, given that this is us, I'm sure we'll make an entirely new series of mistakes.  But there is only so much I can do to prepare you for this."

 

Okazaki didn't say anything to that, and after a while, the Other sighed again.

 

"I'm right, you know," the Other said.  "Even if you don't want to admit it to yourself."

 

Okazaki would have loved to refute him.  But it was the same conclusion he had already drawn himself.

 

The Other was right.

 

"Regardless if whether or not you are right," Okazaki noted, "I still hate you.  And I think it was a dick move on your part."

 

"That's fine," the Other said, his characteristic smirk absent from his face.  "We've done too many detestable things to feel otherwise.  And really, this is just the latest dick move on my part."

 

"I suppose this raises one final question then," said Okazaki.  "You say you were testing me.  For what?"

 

The Other snorted.  "You haven't figured this out by now?"

 

"I have a guess," Okazaki said.  "You're going to send me off to another universe, and hope I don't screw that one up too."

 

"Close!  Close, but no cigar," the Other said.  "No.  I'm going to send you back to the universe you came from.  Naturally, I'll be coming along for the ride.  So will Ushio.  And then you're going to fix what you broke, admittedly with our help.  Technically it won't be the same universe after that point, another variation will break off from that point, but it will still be the universe you came from."

 

Had Okazaki retained a body, he would have gaped at the Other, with a few blinks thrown in for good measure.  As circumstances permitted, he merely floated, stunned, as he contemplated that.

 

"...Kotomi," he said at last.  "I will see her again?"

 

"You will," the Other confirmed with a smile.  "And as a bonus, she'll even still be herself, not what she became after everything happened."

 

"Will I still retain my friends?"

 

"Oh, yes."  The Other smirked.  "Due to the nature of how these things work, you'll be deposited into your, ah... bodies, a few days before you caused most of them to leave you."

 

"I see."  Okazaki mulled this over for a few moments.  _'So... it'll all be back to the way it was, then?  Everything will be alright?  Assuming I can trust him?  Needless to say, I don't deserve that.'_   He paused.  _'Of course, this isn't about me, is it?  Well, I mean it is, but... they don't deserve to have to live and die through that again.  This time, I can save them.  And even if this is all a pack of lies... what, exactly, do we have to lose at this stage?'_

 

"Very well, then," Okazaki signed.  "Let us merge."

 

The Other nodded.  "Alright, then."  He stood.  "Just stand there very still.  I'll be handing control of this to Ushio; this is her shtick."

 

"You mean float, right?"

 

"Shush, you."  The Other's face rippled away, leaving Ushio's in its place.

 

"Right," Ushio said as she walked forward, only to stop just in front of Okazaki.

 

He remained still, even as she took a few slow steps forward, coming to a stop inside his form.

 

\----0----

 

Energy.

 

Okazaki was aware of energy being released.  The scientific part of his mind wondered idly what form of energy it was.  The part of him that was the Other told him it was more the 'concept' of energy, another sort of Platonic form, and the closest thing to 'pure energy' as existed.  He figuratively shrugged, deciding it didn't really matter, causing the part of him that was the Other to roll metaphorical eyes.

 

His ethereal senses looked on as the remnants of Ushio's shack flew apart, reminding him of matchsticks in a cyclone.  The landscape under him deformed, the immense raw power once locked in Ushio's and the Other's form joining to his own reserves and wreaking havoc with the terrain.

 

The part of him that was the Other watched with muted interest.  The sense that he was worried whether it would be enough bothered Okazaki, and he mentally tried to pry the reasoning behind that out of their joined form.  The Other erected mental barriers however, surprising Okazaki.  A quick poke at the part of him that was Ushio told him that the Other wasn't the only one who could do that.

 

As suddenly as the outpouring of energy began, it stopped, as Okazaki solidified control over his energies.  He looked over the crater that used to be Ushio's shack and blinked.

 

_'Well.  That happened.  Wish you two would let me know why he's worried, though.'_

 

_'Can't give it all away on the first date.'_

 

_'Who said that?'_

 

_'That'd be the Other.  Sorry, mind rapists are not my type.'_

 

_'The feeling is largely mutual.'_

 

_'Largely?!'_

 

_'Can we get on with this?  I know time isn't an issue, but it's still a-wastin'.'_

 

_'I can't think of anything I'd possibly like to do more at this moment.'_

 

He shimmered and disappeared.

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A Note From The Author:**

 

Sooo....  That happened.  I have to say that when the time warp happened in After Story it felt sort of cheap, hopefully the same feel won’t happen here.  Hopefully.

 

Anyway, so next update....  It may be a while.  Courses have ramped up considerably, just not finding time for writing and revising and whatnot.  So yeah.  Life happens.


	35. Recharted Territory, Part 1

**A Note From The Author:**

 

...Surprise!  Well, maybe not much of one, but hey!  I’m still alive!  Now, this is sort of a good news/bad news situation.  Good news, I have more story for you.  Bad news, next semester already has that look of one that could be worse than the last one, so there may be more delays after the second half of this gets released.

 

...

 

Considering how far this has went from even the spirit of Clannad, maybe that sounds like a good thing to some of you.  I have to admit, looking back on all of it now, I feel like apologizing to the fandom.  However, I’m also going to finish this thing, because I’ve read too many half-finished fics that never got finished.  Plus side there, I have everything plotted and even skeletal.  I’ll be working on that as much as I can before the semester hits full swing, we’ll see where I get.

 

Either way, have some long delayed story, and a happy new year!

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

The Okazaki/Ushio/Other fusion descended on the past Okazaki without warning.  The mental attack went through nonexistent defenses, each and every fragment of the past Okazaki overridden before he had the chance to even realize he'd been under attack.  It was the psionic equivalent of a blitzkrieg, and even more successful than its more physical counterpart.

 

The Okazaki from the past was no more, absorbed into the Okazaki portion of the Okazaki/Ushio/Other fusion.

 

There was a momentary roadblock, as thousands of minds tried to reconcile thousands of years of memory from three different individuals.  Then the software did its job, and the memories merged.

 

_'Okay,'_ he thought, as the metaphorical dust settled.  _'Where... when, are we?'_   He checked the date and time.  _'Ah, so that means... just after I went to Ushio's realm.'_

 

_'The last time you truly slept,'_ came a voice in his head.  He wasn't sure to who it belonged _.  'It's one of those weird metaphysical rules, though it has a certain logic to it.  You never truly sleep, so the times you are close to the, ah, let's call it the spirit realm, those times are few and far between.  This time is the most recent.'_

 

_'So... as promised, before I told them my past and ruined the friendships,'_ Okazaki reflected.  _'Nice, I can work with that.'_   Another thought entered his mind unbidden.  _'Also before Kotomi kissed me, and we had that talk.'_

 

_'These things come at a cost.  If you want to go back to that state, you'll have to do it yourself.'_

 

_'...I think I do,'_ he admitted _.  'But not like that.  That was... awkward, and just... awkward.'_

 

_'Well, suit yourself.  That part is definitely your show.'_

 

_'Mm.  Anyway, there are other issues to address.  Let's see....'_   He brought up a list. _'Hm, fix projector... practically done, just need to make sure to have it on the desk.  Greet Tomoyo at door in the morning....  It'll be nice to see her, you know, alive and not hating our guts.  Get pestered by Kyou... will be nice to see her not... destroyed inside, like she was.  Talk with Kotomi....'_

 

_'Well how about that.  Instant distraction.'_

_'I missed her,'_ Okazaki thought with bitterness _.  'The her that wasn't destroyed.  By... well, everyone in here, really.'_

_'But mostly you.'_

 

_'...Not in the mood to argue the point.  Anyway.'_   He made another mental check.  _'Tomoyo pesters us again the following morning....  Need to make elevator to Kotomi's house....  Well, already have most of the required equipment fabricated and in place....'_

 

_'Is there a point to this tallying?'_

 

_'As a matter of fact, there is,'_ he thought back _.  'Do you know what I haven't done in a great many years?'_

 

_'Be a decent person?'_

 

_'Shush, Other,'_ Okazaki thought as he set everything that could be automated to run themselves and shut down everything else.  _'Anyway, I've not had a decent night's sleep.  Most I can get is having some brains be asleep, and that's not the same thing.  I can get a good night's sleep now, right?'_

 

_'It is possible-'_

 

_'Well, I'm calling it a night then,'_ he interrupted _.  'I'm exceedingly tired.'_

 

_'...Alright then.  Goodnight, Okazaki.'_

 

_'Night, Ushio.  And night, Other.'_   His thoughts took an amused turn _.  'Goodnight, John boy!'_

 

_'Just go to sleep if you're going to.  This isn't the Waltons.'_

 

_'Yeah, yeah....'_   Okazaki let his brains slowly drift to sleep.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki woke slowly.  The mechanical portions buried in his brains sent signals that were heeded at a lethargic pace, years of uneasy half-sleep finally having caught up with the cybernetic hivemind.

 

The fragment of Okazaki that lived in his own home yawned, only to be interrupted by knocking.

 

_'Guah, feel like military academy,'_ he reflected sourly as he attempted to force himself out of the bed.  _'Bits of me keep passing out.'_   He giggled slightly at the reference even as he stumbled to the ground, feet tangled in his sheet.

 

_'Wake up, me.  We've got company.'_

 

_'Past?'_ Okazaki thought blearily as he righted himself and stepped gingerly out of the sheet.

 

_'Your once dead friend Tomoyo, I think.  If these memories are anything to go by.'_

 

_'Ahh, it'll be nice to see her alive again,'_ he reflected as he grabbed a doorframe to steady himself.  He blinked at the gouges his fingers had left in the wood.  _'Oops.'_

 

_'Not a morning person, Okazaki?'_

 

_'I dunno, I haven't had a chance to find out recently,'_ Okazaki admitted as he finally made it, somewhat dazed, to the front door.  _'Why isn't everything waking up?'_

_'It is, just... slowly.'_

_'Well, that's nice,'_ he thought as he opened the door.  The fist that attempted to knock on his face woke him up somewhat.  _'Huh.  That happened last time too, didn't it?  Oh, pain.  I should totally shock myself awake.'_

 

"Ah, Okazaki, I did not mean to- um..."  Tomoyo started, then took note of his attire, or lack thereof.

 

"Uh... huh?"  He blinked and looked down at himself.  _'Oh.  Well, at least I have boxers on.'_ He looked back up at her increasingly reddening face.  "Ungh.  Give me five.  I just found out I'm not a morning person."  He slowly let the door close.  _'Well, that was awkward.  Hm.'_

 

_'Good job, there.  Gold star.'_

 

_'Hey, I haven't slept in years,'_ he thought _.  'I really should have figured on something like this happening.'_ He retreated to his room to dress.

 

\----0----

 

Five minutes, a wardrobe change, and some impromptu electroshock therapy later, Okazaki returned to the door.  "Oh hey, you're still here," he admitted as he saw Tomoyo's still red face.  "I thought you might have ran off after that."

 

"Do you always answer the door like..."  Tomoyo asked with a frown.

 

"No, but... eh, it's a long story."  He scratched his head and stood aside.  "Well, come on in, then."

 

"I'm not sure I should," she admitted with a raised eyebrow.

 

"Sorry, as I said, I'm not a morning person," he said.  "Admittedly, I didn't know that until... well, five minutes ago."

 

"That doesn't make sense," she said, and took a step inside.  "Doesn't one normally know if they're a morning person or not?"

 

"Under ordinary circumstances, yes.  And with ordinary people."  He let the door close behind her and strode into his kitchen.  "Can I get you some coffee or something?  Tea?"

 

"Um, coffee," Tomoyo replied as she looked around.  "It's cleaner than-"

 

"-you expected a boy's house to be," Okazaki finished for her from the kitchen as he put some ground coffee into his coffee maker.  "Yes, I know.  Cleanliness is next to godliness.  Hm, said that last time too."  He poured some water in the machine and stepped back into the main room.

 

Tomoyo opened her mouth to say something, and then closed it again.  "...So it is," she said at last.

 

"And you said that last time, too."  He shook his head as he took the sight of her in and smiled.  "It's good to see you, although I suppose you are feeling the need of an explanation right about now?"

 

"The thought had occurred to me, yes," she replied with a frown.

 

"Well, explanations I can do, although it is all rather muddled."  He scratched his chin.  "Here, I'll give you the short version, along with a bit of proof.  First, I direct your attention to my hand."  He held out his left hand.  "Perfectly ordinary, is it not?"

 

Tomoyo considered his hand for a moment, and then turned her eyes to his face with a raised eyebrow.  "I suppose so.  I don't-"

 

"Look at the hand again, please," Okazaki chided.

 

She turned her face back to his hand.

 

As she watched, he allowed some of the tools in his hand to swap out.

 

She let out a gasp.  "W-What the hell?"

 

He let the entire hand swing down to reveal the end of a laser cannon barrel.  "The first thing to note is that I'm not exactly one-hundred-percent human anymore."  He smirked.  "I trust this is sufficient proof in that regard?"

 

She blinked and, after a long moment, nodded.

 

"This comes with many possibilities," Okazaki continued.  "Direct mind-to-machine interfacing.  Allowing the brain to communicate with a machine... allowing a machine to communicate with a brain... and indirectly, allowing a brain to communicate with a brain."  He sighed.  "There are more than one of me running around now, thanks to this.  Quite a bit more, actually."  He chuckled.  "And that's discounting some unsettling temporal activity...."

 

Tomoyo sat down heavily on his couch.  "If I didn't see you do that with your hand, I would say that you had gone insane."

 

"Hm."  He chuckled after a moment.  "I wonder if you're not far wrong.  But I also know what happened.  Parts of what will happen.  I won't bore you with the mechanics involved, they're unimportant at the moment and I'm not sure I could properly explain anyway.  The long and the short of it is though, that a... well, a past version of me also exists in this world.  Not as Okazaki... but as what I was before I was reborn."

 

She raised an eyebrow and frowned.  "Reborn?"

 

"Well, that is an important bit, I suppose," he said.  "This... is not the first shot I have had at life.  In fact, technically it's not the second either, but the issue there is... muddied."  He drummed his index finger on his chin in thought.  "Anyway, this past version of me will do some seriously bad shit if I don't do something, because he is quite misguided.  Unfortunately, what I will do has the chance of leaving me rather dead."

 

_'...How do you know this?  We kept this from you.'_

 

_'Ahh, so I was right,'_ he thought _.  'As for how I know, I rationalized it.  I found out from our merger that we're now capable of quite a few things.  Then, I thought about how I would try and dispose of a past me, if I was unable to defeat him outright, and....  Well, let's just say that I know how you think.'_

 

_'Very clever.'_

 

Tomoyo opened her mouth to say something, and then shut it again.

 

"It's a lot to take in all at once, isn't it?"  Okazaki smiled as he sat down on the recliner.  "The take-home message, and the reason I am telling you this, is that there's a fair likelihood that I may not be around anymore, a few days from now.  Or maybe I will.  I rather hope to be, of course, but... I cannot discount that possibility."

 

"I... see."  She sighed as she leaned back.  "You're right.  This is a lot to take in at once."

 

"Well, just bear in mind that, whatever happens, it is for the best."  He stood up and looked at her with a frown.  "I saw that future, where I didn't... properly intervene.  It was not pleasant."  He looked to the side.  "Be glad that you do not know what would have happened."

 

"When you put it that way, I find myself becoming curious," she said as she leaned forward.

 

"Curiosity killed the cat, so the saying goes."  He shook his head.  "Some things are best left unknown.  And what exactly happened is a secret I will take to the grave."  He walked into his kitchen.  "Anyway, if you still want some, the coffee's ready."

 

"Thank you Okazaki kun, but after this I think I need to decline," Tomoyo said as she stood up.  "You have given me much to think about."

 

"That, I do not doubt," Okazaki said with a smile as he poured himself a cup of coffee.  "I'm sorry for that, for what it's worth.  But I thought you deserved to know."

 

She looked down for a moment, and then nodded.  "Thank you for telling me, in that event."

 

"You're welcome," he replied.

 

With that, Tomoyo left.  Okazaki walked back toward his room, and noticed the gouges his fingers had left on the doorframe.  A flash of red overlaid his vision for a moment, as the memory of Kyou's pet Botan made itself known.  He shuddered, and had an unaugmented body sent toward his house.

 

"Not again," he said to himself with a shudder.  "I won't let that happen again."

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki sent up a mostly human clone, and waited.  He didn't send down the more robotic fragment however; he would need it for proof soon.  To pass the time, he put The Twilight Zone on, and watched it through two sets of eyes.  The way he figured it, he might not have another chance to watch it again.  As the hour approached that he remembered Kyou coming over, he paused the video and his more human fragment walked toward the door.

 

At a precise time, he opened the door and found Kyou, fist raised to knock.  He blinked, caught up for an instant by memories of her face; first right after Fujibayashi had died, and then after he accidentally killed Botan.  He shook the images off and smirked at her.

 

She blinked at him and raised an eyebrow.  "...So, I hear-"

 

"That I got caught fighting Yamaguchiya, right?"  He crossed his arms and leaned against the doorframe.

 

She blinked again.  "Um, yes."

 

"Let's see if I remember this right...."  He started counting with his fingers.  "Kotomi wasn't happy to learn that I wouldn't be there for the next three days, the choir club agreed to join the theater club, and I partially undid your work convincing Furukawa that I'm not a psychopath."

 

Kyou blinked once more and took a step back.  "...Tomoya, you're kind of scaring me a little."

 

"Well, let em scare you a little more, then."  He stood to the side.  "Make yourself at home!"

 

She raised an eyebrow.  "...Maybe I should stand out here?"

 

"Sure, but Kotomi will be here in a minute or so.  You did tell her my address, right?"  He winked.

 

She gulped.  "...Definitely scaring me a little."

 

"Sorry, I was in the future.  Bad future.  Came back to prevent it future.  You know, like in the Terminator movies."  He shook his head and put his hands on his hips.  "Oh hey, I totally wasn't joking about the mind-linked army bit, by the way."

 

She stared at him agape.

 

"So, yeah.  Actually, I had to die to come back.  Again."  He frowned.  "May die again.  I'm hoping to avoid this, though."

 

Kyou blinked.  Then blinked again.  Then she shook her head.  "Um, I guess you're doing pretty well for being dead?"

 

Okazaki snorted and laughed.  "Hah!  Now there's an old one.  Haven't heard that since I last played Fallout 2.  Didn't think you had, though."

 

She turned her head away while maintaining eye contact.  "Um, I haven't."

 

"Oh.  Well, coincidences happen!"  He smiled widely at her.

 

She stared at him for a few moments before taking a deep breath.  "...Tomoya, I think you might need help.  Professional help."

 

He snorted again.  "What, you mean like a psychologist?"

 

She nodded.

 

"You may well be right," he conceded with a shrug.  "But not for delusions, which I'm sure is what you are thinking.  Hm.  If you'll take a look behind me?"  He gestured expansively toward the interior of his house.

 

With glacial slowness, she looked past him to where his other fragment now stood.  It waved at her, and she made a strangled noise.

 

"Are you alright?" his human fragment asked with a raised eyebrow.

 

"...I knew you weren't joking, thought you were joking," she said under her breath, her eyes locked on his second fragment as she swayed slightly and grabbed the doorframe.

 

"No jokes there," Okazaki admitted, "just a sarcastic confession.  It's amazing what you can get away with if you make it sound like you're joking."

 

"Tomoya," Kyou said after taking a breath, "I am going to go home now.  I am going to forget this conversation happened.  When you get off your suspension, we are going to go back to being abusive friends."

 

"I see."  He shrugged.  "Well... it was good to see you, all the same."

 

"Not talking about it!"  She turned around curtly.  "Going home!"

 

"Goodbye, Kyou," he said with a sigh.

 

Kyou walked away without a word.

 

Okazaki silently watched her walk away down the sidewalk, and leaned against the doorframe.

 

A familiar voice came from the other direction, its breathiness beautiful to his ears.  "...Oh?  Is that Kyou-chan?"


	36. Recharted Territory, Part 2

Okazaki's head snapped to the source of the voice, his unaugmented body caught by surprise.  _'...Kotomi...'_

 

Kotomi walked toward him, and came to a stop in front of Okazaki

 

He regarded her wide eyed and slightly agape.  _'How is it that I knew this was coming, and I'm still surprised?'_

 

She looked into his eyes, and blinked after a long moment.  "...Tomoya kun?"

 

He blinked and averted his gaze, realizing he had been staring.  "...Kotomi chan."

 

"...Is something wrong?"  She pouted.

 

 _'My gods.  Was she always that beautiful?'_   He shook his head.  "No, I'm just....  I have had a very long night, honestly.  A lot of things happened, and....  You know, it'll be easier to explain if we're both sitting while we talk."  He shook his head again and stood to the side.  "Not that I'm sure I want to explain, mind you."

 

"...Alright," she said, as she stepped inside his house.

 

"Just take any seat you want," Okazaki said as his other fragment went into the kitchen and started to prepare some tea.

 

Kotomi looked toward the kitchen curiously as she went into his living room, and sat down on his couch.

 

His unaugmented fragment picked up a seat with a grunt of effort and sat it down across from the couch, and then sat down.  He steepled his fingers together, leaned forward, and regarded her as he rested his chin against his hands.

 

"...Whatever you have to tell me," she said after an uncomfortable moment, "I'll accept it.

 

He sighed.  "I know.  Even after everything happened, you did remain at my side.  Even if...."  He shook his head.  "Kotomi chan.  As you know, I am a reincarnation of my past self, striving to fight against my past self who still exists in this world."  At her nod, he continued.  "What you don't know, because of how recent this development is, is that I have become reincarnated again, after a fashion."

 

He leaned back in his seat.  "To be more specific, I have come back and taken over this past version of myself, from before my attempt to take out my past self.  This is because in a future, one that thankfully has no chance of happening now, I, along with everyone in this city... died."

 

Kotomi gasped.  "...You died?"

 

Okazaki nodded.  "As did you.  And so too did Kyou and Ryou, Nagisa, Tomoyo....  Everyone we cared about.  All because I did something for the wrong reasons.  I tried to prevent a paradox, but in the end, it happened anyway and everything I did was for nothing.  There was never an issue of a paradox.  Or rather, there was, but not at that level."

 

She looked to the side.  Her eyes began to sparkle with unshed tears.

 

"That future no longer has any chance of occurring," he said.  "However, there is a price that must be paid.  How great a price is still up in the air."

 

"...Why did it happen?"  She turned to him as a tear fell from her eye.  "What did you think would happen?"

 

"I didn't know," he admitted.  "The worst case scenario I envisioned was that the whole universe would paradox itself right out of existence.  Even so, I was not... ready to pay the price I ended up paying."

 

"...I don't... know what to say," she said as another tear fell from her eyes.  "Everyone...."

 

"Everyone will live now," Okazaki said.  "With... one possible exception."

 

"...What do you mean, Tomoya kun?"  Kotomi looked directly at him, her gaze boring straight through his soul.

 

He looked to the side.  "In order to prevent such a future from taking place again, or something even worse..."  He grit his teeth and met her gaze once more.  "I will have to face my past self in a battle of souls.  I may not survive the attempt."

 

"...Tomoya kun...."  Tears began to fall in earnest.  "Please don't leave me.  Don't tell me that and then leave me."

 

He winced and stood up.  "I....  I can't make any promises, Kotomi chan.  You must understand that."  He walked past the coffee table and sat beside her on the couch.  "I will promise this, though.  I will do my best to return."  He wrapped his arms around her shoulders.  "For you, I will do my best."

 

She continued to sob in his arms, and he sighed.  It was a horrible thing to do to her, he knew.  And yet, to say nothing was even worse, particularly if things did end poorly and he was either killed outright or trapped in the other world.  At least this way, even if the worst happened, she would know ahead of time.  And maybe that would help.

 

"...Don't leave me," she murmured as she turned to cry into his chest.

 

"Shh, don't cry," he said gently as he stroked her hair.  "Don't cry..."

 

"...Don't leave me," she repeated.

 

"I'll try," he murmured.  He began to hum softly.

 

Her sobs began to slow after a few minutes, and her breathing started to even out.

 

He realized she had fallen asleep like that, likely emotionally exhausted.  With a sigh, he bent over to kiss her hair, before resting his head against hers.

 

\----0----

 

Kotomi roused almost seventeen minutes later, and Okazaki released her from his grip.

 

"...Oh," she said as she looked around.  "I'm somewhere strange?"

 

"Still at my house," Okazaki observed with a smile.  "Do you want some tea?"

 

She blinked blearily and looked at him for a moment, and then reached over to crush him with a hug.

 

"Uh," he said, before returning her hug.  "You know, you can't stay latched to me forever," he observed.

 

"...I don't care," she replied.  "You might be gone.  I don't want to leave."

 

 _'Oh gods.  It'll kill her if I die in this, won't it?'_   "...Alright," he replied.  _'Damn pity I can't just dump Past in the other world without worrying about him finding a way out.'_

 

_'And he would, eventually.  He may well be barking mad by the time he figured out how to escape, and in terms of mental combat, there is a power born of insanity.  And in a straight-up fight, there's no chance of you winning a physical confrontation.  Not without your past memories to guide you.'_

 

_'And it's impossible to seal the dimension from outside; ergo, if things go that poorly, you'll need to be inside to seal him away.  So taking him on then and there is the only option.  Unless you want certain defeat a little later on.  This way at least, there's a chance you'll come back from it.'_

 

 _'Wonderful,'_ he thought as he gestured toward the television.  "Well, since you're staying for a bit, want to watch something?  I don't know if you're familiar with it, but there's a television show called The Twilight Zone that I was watching.  I think you'd like it.  It's basically golden age science fiction short stories in visual format."

 

"...Oh?"  She blinked, and then nodded.

 

"Heh, alright."  He smiled.  "It's spoken English of course, but you already know that, right?"

 

"...I do," Kotomi replied in English.

 

"Heh!  Very good then," Okazaki said, also in English.  "Now, do you want some tea?"

 

She nodded, and his other fragment in the kitchen started the tea kettle to boil.

 

"Right, it'll be a couple minutes," he said as he un-paused the video.  "In the meantime...."  He summoned his hammiest voice.  "Welcome... to the Twilight Zone!"

 

She blinked at him, and then smiled slightly before she turned her attention to the television set.

 

\----0----

 

A couple minutes later, the tea kettle in Okazaki's kitchen began to whistle.  The fragment of Okazaki in the kitchen picked it up, poured water into two tea cups, and added tea leaves.  He then picked up the two cups, and brought them out to his other fragment and Kotomi.

 

When Kotomi saw the fragment, she blinked repeatedly in bewilderment, her wide eyed gaze torn between the teacup holding fragment and the fragment in her arms.

 

"Remember how I said I was a mind-linked army?" both Okazakis asked at the same time.

 

"...But... how?"  She loosened her grasp on the more human Okazaki fragment slightly.

 

"It's a long story," said the fragment in her arms.  "If you want, I can tell you some about it.  Would you rather I did that, over watching more of the Twilight Zone?"

 

Just as like the first time he had offered this option, she jumped at the opportunity.  She nodded her head energetically.

 

Her reaction still amused him, but it was a muted amusement when he considered that he might not be able to come back to her.

 

"Well, then, I suppose that settles that," he said with a smile.  His more human fragment took the teacups, as his mechanical fragment dodged her attempt to grab her own.

 

"...Huh?"  She blinked at the more mechanical Okazaki.

 

"...Sorry, it's just..."  His mind flashed back to the corpse of Botan once more, and his traitorous mind superimposed Kotomi's face on the image.  The more human fragment shook his head as the mechanical fragment left to the elevator.

 

"...Something that happened in the other future?" Kotomi asked.

 

"Yeah," Okazaki admitted after a long moment with a nod as he handed Kotomi her tea.  "I....  A mechanical form of mine was... too strong.  I had tried to save Kyou's pet pig from an accident, but...."  He shuddered.  "I don't... want to talk about it."

 

"...Alright," she replied.

 

"Sorry, it's just....  For a moment I saw you in the same position, and...."  He swallowed.  "...And I'm talking about it still."  He took a sip of tea to calm himself.  "So, the mind-to-machine interface."

 

She looked to the side for a moment, and then back at him.  She opened her mouth as if to say something, then shut it again and vigorously shook her head.

 

He raised an eyebrow at her actions.

 

"...Tell me about the mind-to-machine interface?" she asked at last.

 

"Yeah," he replied, and began to explain the fundamentals, as he had so long ago.

 

\----0----

 

The discussion lasted well into the night.  As Okazaki remembered, Kotomi picked up the basic concepts with almost frightening speed.  As they talked, Okazaki brought up another mostly human fragment, just in case he needed to answer the door for something, as well as to provide nourishment.  Kotomi had been unwilling to let him go the entire time, with the exception of the occasional restroom breaks.

 

He was thankful she didn't insist on him accompanying her for that as well; it would have been far too awkward, even for him.

 

Still, the day began to give way to night, and he wondered if she would want to return home, under the circumstances.

 

"It's getting late," he said at last.  "Very late, in fact."  Late enough to make him question the wisdom of sending her away alone, although he could always trail her with an infiltration fragment to ensure her safety.

 

Kotomi nodded and yawned.

 

"...Not to sound like I'm trying to send you away or anything," Okazaki began, "but don't you think you should head home?  The rumor mill is probably already having a field day...."

 

She shook her head vehemently, even as she started to blush at the implication.  "...You said you may die."  She clutched him tighter.  "I don't want to leave.  I want to cherish what time I have with you, even if...."  She choked up.

 

He rubbed her back with a sigh.  "Kotomi chan...."  He winced as she looked him in the eyes again.  _'...Dammit.  I can't argue with that expression.'_   "...Alright, I'm not going to say anything further...."

 

She nodded and, using her position to her advantage, pressed her lips to his.  It was her first kiss, and his second.

 

He winced slightly, even as he kissed her back gently.

 

"..Ah..." she said as she pulled her face away from his. A bright blush lit up on her face as she brought her hand up to her lips.

 

"...Oh Kotomi chan," he said with a sigh.  "You know you're just making it harder on yourself, if...."

 

"...Maybe," she admitted after a long moment.  "But I want you to know how I feel....  How I really feel.  I told my parents I hated them, and then they died....  I never had the chance to apologize.  I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I didn't do so now."  She looked to the side, her face growing steadily redder.  "Tomoya kun....  I love you."

 

"...Kotomi chan...."  He closed his eyes.  _'Well, shit.  It'll just hurt her more if I tell her now and don't come back but....  Damn it.'_   He shook his head.  "You're putting me in a most unfortunate position."

 

Her eyes snapped to his, hurt plainly visible.

 

"I love you too," he admitted.  "And having said so, I've potentially made the hurt all the greater if...."

 

"...Please don't talk about it," she said as she buried her face in his chest.

 

"...Alright," he said.  "Alright."

 

No further words were said that night.  A few minutes later, she fell asleep next to him, and he let himself fall into a natural sleep.

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A Note From The Author**

 

Well, I have a spot of bad news; this semester definitely looks worse than the last.   Already effectively behind due to not doing some things before the semester start, yay.  If I’m lucky, I’ll get another chapter set done, but I really wouldn’t count on it.  Next update may not be for a few months.  ):

 

On the plus side, well....  Hey!  Have another chapter!


	37. A Time Of Goodbyes, Part 1

**A Note From The Author:**

 

...Surprise ‘I ain’t dead yet’ update! Because I ain’t dead yet!

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

Kotomi stayed there with Okazaki on his couch until morning, when he gently shook her awake.

 

"Kotomi chan, wake up," he said. "It's time to go to school."

 

"...Um? Oh..." She blinked blearily and looked around, confused. "...I'm somewhere strange again..."

 

He smiled, amused. "Not a morning person?" With a thought, he sent for another mostly human version of himself. If Kotomi was determined to cling to him, not that he strictly minded of course, then he would need to take care of certain things himself.

 

She looked at him. "...Tomoya kun?"

 

He raised an eyebrow. "Kotomi chan?"

 

"...Where am I?"

 

He chuckled. "Really, really not a morning person. Well I can't say anything apparently. Anyway, you stayed at my house. On this couch with me, as a matter of fact."

 

She blinked at this. "...Oh." Her face began to turn red as she considered that, and noted her position in his arms. "Oh, I remember now."

 

"Do you now?" he teased.

 

She nodded, and after a moment’s thought, snuggled into his chest. "...Tomoya kun is warm."

 

Okazaki blinked, and then shrugged, petting her hair gently. _'Okay, so I could get used to this. Fine, I'll admit it, this is nice. Wrong perhaps, but nice. ...Strange, I feel so calm here. With her in my arms, everything that happened seems worthwhile.'_

 

They stayed like that for some time, just holding onto one another. The flesh-and-blood version of himself he had sent for arrived, and he promptly began to make some tea. As he set the kettle on the burner, there was a tentative knocking on his door. He sighed, even as Kotomi looked up with a blink.

 

"Hold on a minute," he said through the tea-making clone. _'Odd, wonder who it is. The timing's right, but surely it's not Tomoyo. ...Right?'_ The clone walked over and looked through the window on the door.

 

Tomoyo stood on the other side, in stark defiance of his expectations.

 

Okazaki blinked, and opened the door. "Tomoyo? I have to admit, I didn't expect to see you."

 

"Okazaki, I see you are up," she said with a nod. "And dressed."

 

 _'Never live it down,'_ he thought snidely. "That I am."

 

"...Tomoya kun, who is it?" asked Kotomi from the couch.

 

Tomoyo raised an eyebrow.

 

The clone with Kotomi blinked. "You remember Tomoyo san?" He sorted through his memories chronologically. "Well, no, I guess you wouldn't. Ah, give me a few minutes and I'll explain."

 

"Okazaki, what's going on here?" Tomoyo gave him a mild glare. "You aren't taking advantage of some poor girl, are you?"

 

"No," he said, rolling his eyes as he turned to face her. _'Kind of the opposite really, if I think about it.'_

 

He could hear the tea kettle begin to whistle. "Hm. I don't suppose you want some tea?"

 

"I think I must decline," Tomoyo replied. "I am somewhat behind schedule already. However, I said I would make sure you were awake."

 

"And once you say you're going to do something, you do it." Okazaki nodded. "Even in this situation. I must admit, I'm impressed."

 

"That being said, I'm not sure I am needed for this task," she admitted, a wistful smile playing on the corners of her lips.

 

He raised an eyebrow at her. "There seems to be an implication there..."

 

"I'm not implying anything at all," she said as she put her hands on her hips. "But... I did some thinking about what you said yesterday. And that thing with your hand... I must admit, that shocked me. But it made me think." She sighed. "I'm not sure whether or not I believe any of it, but I must allow for the possibility. Okazaki. Whatever happened... be careful. Don't let it happen again."

 

"...I'll do my best," he replied.

 

She smiled brightly. "Good. Goodbye, Okazaki."

 

He nodded. "See you later, Tomoyo."

 

She turned and walked out onto the sidewalk, and he closed the door. He considered the closed door for a moment, and then shrugged and walked back to the tea kettle.

 

"That was Sakagami Tomoyo," said the clone with Kotomi. "Nice girl, mostly. I think you'd like her. Oh, also, it is time for school. Are you going?"

 

Kotomi buried her face into his chest. "...No."

 

"Ah, well... alright," he said.

 

The tea-clone brought his tea set in, and set it on the coffee table. It picked up Kotomi's cup and held it out to her with an amused smile. "Tea, madam?"

 

"...Thank you," she said with a smile as she took it.

 

The tea-clone nodded and returned to the kitchen to prepare something for breakfast.

 

Okazaki looked at her. "So what do you want to do today?"

 

She looked down in thought for a moment before looking at him again. "...Could you tell me more about the mind-to-machine interface?"

 

"Gladly," he said with a smile. "But first, do you want me to bring you a change of clothes from your house? Now that I have that elevator made, I can do that in a jiffy."

 

She nodded. "...Can I go to your bunker?"

 

"But of course," he replied. "You want to go now, or do you want to talk about the mind-to-machine interface some more?"

 

"...Mind-to-machine interface," she said.

 

He nodded and grinned. "Mind-to-machine interface it is!"

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki explained the basic principles to Kotomi as they drank tea and ate an omelet. Shortly after their breakfast, Kotomi bathed, leaving him to finish assembling the projector. When she came out, he had to admit that the black dress he had retrieved from her house looked just as good on her as it ever did.

 

The two Okazaki fragments traded places, the one that had been with Kotomi bathed while the tea-clone sat on the couch with her and began to explain the mind-to-machine interface. When the clone finished bathing, it sat down in the kitchen and took a nap.

 

The day proceeded to go by with somber tranquility. The peace was shattered late in the afternoon by an annoyed pounding on his door.

 

The napping fragment blinked awake and frowned. _'This didn't happen before. That's interesting, what changed?'_ He looked to the door.

 

Kyou glared back at him through the glass.

 

 _'Well now! Didn't see her coming back yet, actually. Really, what's up?'_ He waved cheekily with a smile and approached the door. He opened it with a small flourish.

 

"Tomoya," she said brusquely.

 

He raised an eyebrow. "Kyou, can't say I-"

 

"So Kotomi chan never showed up at school." She poked him in the chest.

 

He frowned. "...And?"

 

"Did she ever actually go home, Tomoya?" She raised a challenging eyebrow.

 

He snorted. "And if I say no-"

 

Kyou grabbed him by the lapels, and shook him with a good deal more success than any previous attempt. "What were you thinking?!"

 

"A lot of things," he said slowly, in an effort to not bite his tongue from the shaking. "Like-"

 

She let him go, and he took a step backward. "I thought you'd just talk to her, maybe work out what problems you were having, but no, you had to go spend the night with her!"

 

He raised an eyebrow. "I think you should say that a little louder, I don't think they heard you in America."

 

Kyou glowered at him. "I am about this close to kicking your ass right now, Tomoya. Don't think that I won't."

 

"Why are you so annoyed, anyway?" Okazaki raised an eyebrow at her. "You've been trying to set us up ever since that one day in the theater club."

 

She pointed an accusatory finger at his face. "Because, mister 'didn't think ahead,' what do you think the school will do if they learn you had her here while you were on suspension?"

 

He crossed his eyes at the finger. "Oh, that."

 

She crossed her arms. "Yes, that."

 

He shrugged. "Not much, actually."

 

Kyou crossed her arms and frowned at him. "Just because you fix things-"

 

Okazaki shook his head. "It's not because I fix things, although that's related. No, there are reasons why this will work out. Or it'll cease to matter."

 

She blinked and raised an eyebrow it him. "...And what exactly is that supposed to mean?"

 

"You'll find out," he replied with a sigh. "Two days after my suspension ends."

 

She put her hands on her hips and tapped her foot. "...Is this related to the whole 'I came from the future' thing you were going on about yesterday?"

 

He looked to the side for a moment. "As a matter of fact, it is."

 

She sighed and shook her head. "...Alright then. I'll let it go for now."

 

He nodded. "Thank y-"

 

Her index finger was again inches from his face. "But if you get the both of you expelled, I won't forgive you."

 

He decided to forgo nodding, for risk of impaling an eye on her finger. "Got it."

 

"Good." She crossed her arms and smirked. "And I expect you to name it after me."

 

Okazaki glared at her. "Go home Kyou."

 

She frowned. "Is that any way to treat a friend?"

 

He stared blankly at her.

 

"...Fine, sheesh," she said after a few moments with a shrug. "I'll just go, then." She turned around and began to walk.

 

He sighed. "Kyou."

 

She stopped, but didn't turn around toward him.

 

"Thank you."

 

"No problem. That's what friends are for, right?" She turned slightly and gave him the thumbs up.

 

He smiled. "Yeah."

 

Kyou nodded, and walked away.

 

Okazaki watched her retreating back for a few moments, before he shook his head and went to go to his room.

 

\----0----

 

The fragment of Okazaki not explaining the mind-to-machine interface to Kotomi simply sat and considered the once-broken projector.

 

 _'Oogami is due to arrive here in a few minutes.... Well, assuming the chaos butterfly hasn't caused him to be delayed or something, hm. Quite possible, considering Kyou's unexpected arrival.'_ The clone with Kotomi looked at her thoughtfully as he contemplated Kyou's earlier words. _'...Much as I hate to admit it, it really would be inconvenient for him to catch her here. Hm. Guess I'll hide her, and rush Oogami off. Shouldn't be difficult.'_

 

The fragment on the couch frowned. "Kotomi chan. Can you lay down and watch quietly for a few minutes?"

 

"...Huh?" Kotomi blinked at him.

 

"It'll help avoid complications with the school," he said with a shrug.

 

She looked down for a moment in contemplation. "...Alright."

 

He smiled at her. "Thank you." He laid down on the couch, and held her close to him.

 

The fragment that had been working on the projector picked it up, walked to the door, and opened it.

 

As expected, Oogami stood in front of the door, raising his fist up to knock.

 

"Oogami san, here." Okazaki thrusted the projector into Oogami's hands.

 

"Ah, Okazaki," Oogami began.

 

"Sorry if I seem to be in a bit of a rush," Okazaki said with a wince. "I'm expecting an important call. It's about the funeral, and.... Yeah."

 

"Ah, right, well, I have what I came here for anyway," Oogami said as he eyed the projector. "Good luck with that, alright?"

 

"Thank you." Okazaki bowed.

 

"No problem." Oogami smirked. "See you in class, alright?"

 

Okazaki nodded. "Sure thing."

 

"Well, later then." Oogami turned and walked back to his car.

 

Okazaki shut the door behind him. He watched quietly until Oogami drove away, before walking back to his room.

 

The fragment of himself on the couch sat up. "Ah, thank you."

 

"...You're welcome," said Kotomi as she sat up beside him.

 

"Shall I continue my explanation then?" He smiled at her.

 

She nodded.

 

"Alright." He continued from where he had left off.

 

\----0----

 

It was well past dark before Okazaki and Kotomi stopped discussing the mind-to-machine interface for the night. They had, over the course of the day, made three simple but filling meals with what Okazaki had in the house. Kotomi, for her part, had stopped clinging to him like she had when he had first come back; he was still trying to decide if that was a good thing or not.

 

On the one hand, maybe it was a sign that she was coming to terms with what could possibly happen. If nothing else, she was at least distracted by his efforts to educate her. On the other hand, he found he missed the contact. There was just something comforting about being held like that.

 

He thought about this as he sipped the remaining juice from a bowl of udon noodles, and then set the bowl down on the kitchen table in front of him. "Delicious. It's surprising what you can do with instant noodles and spices."

 

She blushed and looked to the side as she set her own bowl down. "...Thank you."

 

"Not a problem," he said with a smile. "So, shall we take a look at the bunker now, then?"

 

She nodded.

 

"Alright, then." He stood, picked their bowls up, and put them in the sink. "I should warn you though, it's very warm down there. It's just so deep and large, there's no adequate way to cool it down properly. Particularly with all the clone forms in there. No airflow at all."

 

She pouted. "...I still want to see it."

 

"Very well," he said with a smile. "Let's go, then."

 

They walked into his bedroom, where the elevator to his bunker was. Kotomi looked around with interest at his room, before turning her attention to the section of floor that slid away to reveal a metal platform.

 

"Right then," he said, and stepped onto the platform. "Milady?" He held out his hand.

 

She blinked at the extended appendage, before tentatively reached out and taking hold of it.

 

He smiled and guided her onto the platform. They descended like that, hand in hand.


	38. A Time Of Goodbyes, Part 2

Kotomi's reactions to his bunker were much the same as they had been before, Okazaki reflected. Sure, a few things were slightly different from the first time he had brought her down there. For one, he was returning her to her own house. For another, he had two of his terminator fragments holding metal plates fanning her from the moment she stepped off the elevator.

 

But in many ways it was just the same as the first time. She would go from one of his fragments to another, smile when he waved at her with one of them, and wince whenever a loud noise came from the factory below. And as they started nearing her house, the vastness of the bunker once again began to have an effect on her.

 

"We're almost there," he assured her. "Just a couple more blocks." They turned past one last column of terminator troops, and came face to face with a mirror of the elevator to Okazaki's house.

 

\----0----

 

Kotomi and Okazaki ascended the elevator. She got them both some tea, and they sat in the room with the screen door to her yard, discussing the mind-to-machine interface. As the night wore on however, Okazaki sighed.

 

 _'Why am I doing this?'_ he wondered as he took a sip of tea. _'It's no longer about her. It's becoming about me. I'm here spending time with her, becoming all the closer to her, when there's a good chance I may not survive what comes. That's not fair, not to her.'_ He sighed again.

 

"...Is something wrong?" Kotomi asked.

 

"...A bit," he admitted as he sat his tea on the table and steepled his hands. _'So what do we do? Push her away? That'd just hurt her. Carry on as if nothing's happening? That could hurt her worse. ...Compromise between the two extremes? Hmm. Maybe.'_ He sighed and closed his eyes. "Kotomi chan. It's getting late."

 

"...Oh?" She glanced over at the grandfather clock. "You're right."

 

"I'm going to go."

 

"...You can stay if you want." She blushed slightly as she spoke.

 

He clenched his teeth. "...I would take you up on that, but... I think it's best, for both of us, if I wait until after I have dealt with my past."

 

"...I see." She frowned and set her hands in her lap.

 

He stood up. "Kotomi chan."

 

She looked up at him. "...Yes?"

 

He walked to stand in front of her, and gently took her hands in his own. "I will do my best, to come back to you. Please... pray for me."

 

She squeezed his hands and nodded.

 

He smiled softly, and kissed the top of her head before pulling back with a frown. "...Goodbye, Kotomi chan."

 

"...Tomoya kun... Goodbye..."

 

He let go of her hands and, without another word, walked to the elevator. He could hear a muted sob behind him, and grit his teeth. Almost, he turned back.

 

 

With a sigh, he stepped into the elevator, and descended.

 

\----0----

 

Tomoyo didn't show up at Okazaki's house the following morning, which came as a mild surprise to Okazaki. After she had shown up the last time, he halfway expected her to keep showing up. With a shrug, he sat and contemplated what he was going to do.

 

His musings were interrupted later in the afternoon by rude knocking on his door. He sighed and stood from his position on the floor, and looked out the door window.

 

Kyou looked back at him with a frown.

 

He mentally shrugged and made his way to the door to open it.

 

"Did you do something to Kotomi chan?" asked Kyou, before he had the chance to speak.

 

"Not in any sense you're thinking of," he replied.

 

She frowned and put her hands on her hips. "...Explain that to me."

 

"I need to deal with my past. It's not going to take long, just a couple more days now really." He sighed. "That sounds more introspective than it is. Sorta. It's... complicated."

 

She pinched the bridge of her nose. "Is this related to that whole 'back from the future' thing?"

 

"...If I say yes?"

 

Kyou rolled her eyes. "Look, I was prepared to let it slide, but you've hurt Kotomi now. And-"

 

"Kyou."

 

"What?"

 

"Do you really think it's what I wanted to do?" He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "There's a good chance I won't be coming back when I confront him. I'm trying to cushion that possible blow, as much as I can. If I could, I wouldn't hurt her again. Unfortunately, I've done too much in the past to make that a possibility."

 

She raised her finger to say something, let it drop after a moment, raised it again, and finally crossed her arms in frustration. "It's still your fault."

 

"Without a doubt," he admitted. "I'm trying to fix my mistakes, though."

 

She shook her head. "Alright, fine. But I still want to know what exactly happened between you and Kotomi."

 

"Honestly? I told her that I needed time to myself until I had taken care of my past. Which will be in three days."

 

"Alright, fine. Why?"

 

"...Because my success is not assured. I may perish in the attempt."

 

She glared at him. "...So you push her away? You think that will cushion the blow?"

 

He sighed. "Honestly, I don't know what to do in this sort of situation. I can only hope that some distance and clear explanations will help her, in a worst case scenario."

 

Kyou considered him for a few moments before sighing. "I was really going to chew you out for this, but after hearing that I just feel sorry for the both of you."

 

"No." Okazaki shook his head with a sigh. "Feel sorry for Kotomi. Whatever happens to me can only be just."

 

She rolled her eyes. "Jeez, Tomoya. Melodrama much?"

 

"I haven't even begun to ham it up enough for you to say that."

 

She snorted. "Good, let's keep it that way."

 

"Heh. Sure, fine." He sighed. "...Can you keep an eye on her for me? Just in case things do go poorly?"

 

"...Is it really that bad?" she asked quietly.

 

"...That's what I've been saying this whole time, Kyou."

 

"Then Tomoya. Don't lose. I'll kick your ass if you do." She held her fist in his face.

 

He smiled softly. "Yeah."

 

Kyou withdrew the fist and smirked at him. "Good." The smirk fell away with a sigh. "I'm serious, you know."

 

"That I do," Okazaki said.

 

She shook her head and turned to leave, but stopped before taking a step. "You know, you're going to have to explain this whole situation to us, sometime."

 

He let out a pained grunt. "...We tried that, and it didn't go so well."

 

She turned her head toward him with an eyebrow raised. "What do you mean?"

 

"I mean that..." He ran a hand through his hair. "You know, never mind. One day, a long time down the road, maybe I'll tell everyone. But I'm not going to do it anytime soon. Not the whole story, anyway. It's too awful." He grit his teeth and sat down on the doorstep. "Much too awful..."

 

She turned back to look at him with a frown. "...Alright Tomoya, I won't ask. Right now." She pointed an index finger at him. "But don't think you're getting out of telling that story."

 

He snorted. "Yeah. I know. But I'll need you to get used to some ideas, first. Unpleasant ones."

 

"Humm..." She turned back again and started walking. "I can't take this melodrama. I'm leaving."

 

"Heh." Okazaki stood up. "Bye then, Kyou."

 

"Bye bye," Kyou replied.

 

With a final shake of his head, he walked back into his house and closed the door.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki didn't bother going back to school when his suspension ended. Instead, he spent some time designing a welcoming gift for his past self. He hoped the absurdity of what he had planned would buy him a measure of time to talk to Past, just on the offhand chance that he could talk him out of his course of action.

 

He didn't realistically expect to succeed, but the attempt would be amusing at least; if perhaps only from a personal perspective.

 

As much as he hated to admit it, he was nervous. Even though he welcomed a good fight, the fact that so much was at stake- not just his own life, with which he had only tenuous attachment to- but also Kotomi's happiness, which as much as it flabbergasted him to admit, was tied to his own.

 

And, of course, the future of the world. One last ditch effort to change the world in a peaceful fashion, or watch it go up in nuclear fireballs again.

 

 _'Right, no pressure,'_ Okazaki thought as he put some finishing touches on the design and started a nanofactory working. _'Of course, nuclear fireballs are probably less likely than complete braindeath when Ushio unleashes her mind plague.'_

 

_'...You know about that.'_

 

_'Actually, I merely suspected. It's what I would do, after all. Thanks for the confirmation that you're both still able to hide things from me, and that you do have that plague on demand. Good to know.'_

 

_'Clever.'_

_'Thank you.'_

 

He waited for the part of him that was Ushio to say something further. But when ten minutes had passed without further comment, he mentally shrugged and opted to spend the rest of the day reading science fiction. It was perhaps the last chance he would get to do so, after all.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki woke slowly the following morning, and stared at the ceiling of his house. The machines under Hikarizaka remained off; he would possibly not find use for them after today, and it wouldn't do to have any runaway reactions in his absence.

 

 _'Today,'_ he thought. _'It's time to face the piper.'_ He yawned and stretched. _'Well, at least I've gotten a good night's sleep. Perhaps the last one I'll ever get. Hm.'_ He mentally checked the time. _'Well, no rush, then. Everything's in order, just need to kill time.'_

 

He sighed and looked down at his hands, examining the details as he sat up. _'All too human. Should have worked on AI research, maybe it wouldn't have fucked up so badly.'_ He snorted. _'Too late for that, now. All that's left is atonement.'_ He looked over at the floor near his bed as it opened up, a set of bagpipes on the elevator platform.

 

"Heh, well, he... I, should get a kick out of this," he said as he rolled his feet to the floor. He took in a deep breath and rubbed his eyes. _'Will I live or will I die? Live or die? I don't think it would have mattered much, not before I met Kotomi.'_ He rested his chin in his palms and regarded the instrument thoughtfully. He shook his head and sighed.

 

 _'Well, may as well get ready,'_ he thought. He straightened his legs to stand, and promptly fell on his face. _'...Dammit. I'm really not a morning person, am I?'_ He crossed to look at the bagpipes, now barely a centimeter from his nose. "Don't you laugh at me," he told it. "Like you've never woke up and fallen on your face."

 

Okazaki blinked as he realized he was talking to an inanimate object, and facepalmed. _'Damn. I've relied far too much on my mechanical half. My biological half is a fruitcake.'_ He pushed himself up and unsteadily walked toward the kitchen, and got himself a cup of tea. Then he got another cup. He thought the first two cups might be lonely, so he sent another cup of tea after them.

 

The caffeine started to hit his system, and he finally went about getting dressed for the day. He then picked up the bagpipes and examined them. The elevator closed up afterward, and powered down; one of the last machines to do so. He tucked it under his arm, and played a single, quick note, just to be sure it was working.

 

"Good," he said, and sat it down on his desk. _'Well, I think that's about everything. Time to face the piper, so to speak.'_

 

_'So melodramatic. Have you considered a career in theater?'_

 

 _'Haha, funny,'_ he thought as he started to compress the specialized implement. _'For the record, I have.'_

 

_'I suppose I should know that, considering.'_

_'You really should, honestly. Theater is fun, I'll say. Okazaki, maybe if you survive this you should see about becoming a professional actor, as opposed to world conqueror.'_

_'Is the peanut gallery quite done?'_ He sighed. _'Because we have a date with destiny.'_

 

_'We'll be done when you get over yourself. I mean, do you even listen to yourself think?'_

 

 _'Too often,'_ he thought while collapsing the pipes. _'Considering I now have you two in my head, I'm thinking I should stop doing it so much.'_

 

_'I don't think he cares for us, Ushio.'_

_'I think that's more your fault than anything. And his fault, for that matter.'_

_'Moving right along,'_ he thought. _'Are you two ready for this? It's your existences on the line, too.'_

 

_'You have to ask?'_

_'Other makes a good point. He's you, and you know how you'd react to this.'_

_'I was asking more for your sake honestly,'_ Okazaki reflected as he worked the instrument into his schoolbag.

 

_'In that event, I too am ready. I was ready ever since the Other killed everyone I cared about.'_

_'Yes, well, it's too late for me to do anything about that. At least I can keep it from happening again.'_

_'I still hate you.'_

_'For what it's worth, I'm sorry. I never thought it would all turn out this way. Except for in my nightmares.'_

_'That doesn't make it right.'_

 

_'Of course not. It's not like I'm trying to make things right or anything, you know?'_

_'You crossed too many lines for you to ever make up for everything you've done.'_

_'At least I'm trying! Unlike you, who just sat there and left the difficult choices to me!'_

_'Left the- I didn't leave anything to you! You never gave me a choice!'_

_'As if you would have done what was necessary. You didn't have the stomach.'_

_'You wanted me to kill everyone I knew!'_

_'It's not like it would keep! And it was necessary. We've been over this!'_

_'You've been over this. You control freak!'_

_'Is that the worst you can do? Yes, I'm a control freak, I admit it. Just one of my many, many faults.'_

_'Oh, it's hardly the worst I could do. Not by a long shot.'_

 

 _'This is like listening to an old married couple bicker in my own brain,_ ' Okazaki thought as he slung his bag onto his shoulder. _'Or maybe one person arguing with themself, considering you don't bother sounding different. At least I can tell who's talking by context.'_

 

The silence that pervaded in his mind after that told him he had probably struck a nerve. He shook his head and walked out the door.

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A Note From The Author:**

 

Well, here we go.

 

Anyway, I have some good and bad news. The good news is, hey! New half-chapter. The bad news is, well, I may or may not be able to update again in a timely fashion. Lots of stuff going down, may impede my ability to write more for a bit. We’ll see, though.


	39. An End To All Things, Part 1

**A Note From The Author:**

Sorry for the massive delays; life has been interesting as of late, and reminding me of the Chinese curse about such things. “May you live in interesting times” indeed. Still, I’m still alive and kicking, and have written a bit more on this. Still working on the ending, but hey, big fight in the meantime; lots of action for those into that sort of thing.

That said, I’m hoping those reading can do me a bit of a favor. I happen to have a friend who’s a DJ, who has started an online radio show. From 5:00 P.M. to 7:00 P.M. (EST) every Wednesday and Saturday, you can tune in to “http://djgamera.caster.fm/” for a LIVE show, complete with song requests. If those reading were to drop by, give it a listen, I’m sure he’d appreciate it, and so would I. So give it a shot!

Anyway, without further ado, have some more story.

**-0-0-0-0-0-0-**

Okazaki looked at the trees of the path, watched as the mid-morning sun showed through the leaves and danced with motes of dust that wafted with the light breeze. He took a deep breath, letting the scent of sakura fill his essence as he leaned against one of the trees for a moment.

 

His eyes traced up the trunk of the tree, and followed one of its branches to another tree. More than once, he had considered going to class jumping from limb to limb, but had dismissed the idea as an unnecessary risk; it would be too easy for someone to see him and take pictures or a video, and potentially cause a paradox.

 

 _'Fuck paradoxes,'_ he thought _. 'Dammit. What I should have done was just go assassinate my past self before he could become distributed. I had that small window of opportunity. But noooo, it would cause a paradox!'_

 

He smacked his fist against the tree. _'And then all of this happened. And it was all for nothing.'_ He took a deep breath. _'Alright. One way or another, it'll be alright now. Even if I don't survive this, Kyou will help her. She's reliable like that.'_ He snorted. _'Just as long as you don't go killing everything dear to her, naturally.'_

 

He pushed himself off the tree and looked around for a moment. _'Huh. You know, isn't this where I met Furukawa? What was it I told her...?'_ He worked his organic brain, trying to remember without mechanical aid. "Ah, yes." He nodded. "Nothing stays the same forever. Nothing but one thing. And that is that one must always go forward." He snorted. "Should take my own damn advice."

 

He shook his head and started walking forward. _'It's true. No way to go now but forward. Too damn late to go back.'_ He paused and chuckled. _'So to speak, at least. This is what, my third go around at things?'_

 

_'It depends on your perspective. If you count me as a part of you, then it's your fourth time around. If you count all your multiversal counterparts, then you've went back an infinite number of times.'_

 

 _'Thank you for that less than helpful observation, Other,'_ Okazaki thought. _'Do you want to make any other entirely accurate but largely irrelevant comments?'_

 

_'The sky is blue, these tree leaves are green, you hate yourself, Past is an asshole, I followed in the proud tradition of being an asshole, so on and so forth.'_

 

 _'I hate it when I get answers to rhetorical questions,'_ he thought.

 

_'Be that as it may, do remember that you did ask. You only have yourself to blame.'_

 

 _'I suppose considering we are technically the same person, that is entirely true,'_ he observed.

 

_'Touché.'_

 

He sighed. _'Quite possibly marching to my own death, trying to save the world from myself, hoping beyond hope that I don't end up breaking Kotomi's heart, and what do I have to put up with? An alternate version of myself being as predictably dickish as ever. Sometimes, this universe just doesn't seem fair.'_

 

_'You've only had to put up with him for a short time, and you've remained in control of your own person for all of it. Really, you should count your blessings.'_

 

 _'Oh, that's great, please join in Ushio,'_ Okazaki thought. _'Do remind me of what a failure of a human being we all are. It'll help pass the time before we throw ourselves into the grinder.'_

 

_'So snarky! What are you going for, the snark knight?'_

 

_'I think he's more trying for deadpan snarker.'_

 

_'He comes off more as an obnoxious snarker to me, really.'_

 

He growled. _'As great as a round of snark-to-snark combat sounds right now, can you two shut up and let me think?'_

 

_'Oh dear, he's trying to give us orders. Does that make us servile snarkers?'_

_'Only if we actually take them.'_

 

Okazaki sighed. _'You know, it's hard enough to tell who's talking without you both snarking at me.'_

 

_'Are you implying I am anything like him?'_

 

 _'I would say he has rubbed off on you some, yes,'_ he thought.

 

_'Alright, I'm out of this conversation, then. Obviously I am getting too caught up in this.'_

 

 _'Obviously,'_ he thought.

 

_'It's just as well. I don't think she qualifies as a little miss snarker.'_

 

 _'You're still here too, then?'_ He looked to the sky and sighed. _'Pity.'_

 

_'Well someone has to keep you company through these dark moments. Besides, tormenting you is rather fun. A way of saying all the things I should have said to myself all those years ago.'_

 

 _'That's great,'_ he thought. _'It's like being lived through vicariously, except with more snarking.'_

 

_'You make a guy feel like he's not wanted.'_

 

He rolled his eyes. _'No. You don't say. What a startling revelation.'_

 

_'Heh. Fair enough. I will leave you to what needs to be done, then. But I will be back, when you need me.'_

 

 _'Yeah.'_ He sighed as the school came into sight. _'I feel like I should probably be thankful for that, but mostly I just want to tell you to eat a bag of dicks.'_

 

_'That's fair. To be expected even, after everything that's happened. It doesn't change matters.'_

 

Silence filled Okazaki's head, and he leaned against the gate. There was nothing left to do but wait.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki saw a figure come down the same path he had come down, and grit his teeth. 'It's time, then.'

 

Past strode onto the school grounds with a stiff yet confident swagger. Alert, greenish blue eyes that seemed stuck in a perpetual glare scanned this way and that warily, an odd complement to the derisive sneer on his face. A hand reached up to stroke his bushy brown beard contemplatively, before reaching down to adjust the clothing on his plus sized torso. He glanced at Okazaki for a moment and walked past him.

 

Okazaki pulled the instrument from his bag and deftly expanded it.

 

Past blinked and looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

 

Okazaki gave him a genial nod and a smile as he continued his work. "Hello there, stranger."

 

Past regarded him for a moment before looking around again.

 

"You know, I always wanted to play for an audience," Okazaki continued as he pulled the pipes up. "Of course, there are very few people around here that would appreciate this instrument."

 

"That's a shame," Past said.

 

"It really is," Okazaki replied. "But I have it on good authority that you would appreciate this."

 

Past blinked and turned to him. "On who's authority, mister...?"

 

"Tomoya," Okazaki replied. "Okazaki Tomoya. And lets just say a... mutual friend?"

 

Past stared down at him hard, a carefully calculated stare designed to make other parties uneasy.

 

Okazaki smirked and began to play the instrument.

 

Past was silent for a few seconds before smirking. "Scotland The Brave. Interesting choice. As it so happens, one of my favorite songs for the instrument. Your friend seems to know a great deal about me."

 

Okazaki ceased playing the instrument. The song continued in spite of this. "Yes. Yes he does, as a matter of fact."

 

Past blinked and frowned. "Your set of pipes seems to be less than authentic."

 

Okazaki looked down at it, amused. "Oh, this old thing?" He chuckled. "You know, it's funny. I never really learned to play the bagpipes. Oh, I always wanted to, but never enough to actually go out and do so." He let out a wistful sigh. "So as always, I find myself resorting to cheating." He glanced at the growing crowd behind Past, come to see what the disturbance was about. _'Sorry to disappoint you folks, but it's not going to be much of a show.'_

 

Past paused and crossed his arms. "...I see. You're fully human."

 

Okazaki nodded. "Not what you were expecting?"

 

Past glared down at him. "Identify yourself."

 

Okazaki glared back. "You will identify first," he said in English.

 

Past blinked and smirked. "State your identity!"

 

Okazaki grinned, wild eyed. "You will identify first!"

 

"IDENTIFY!" Past roared.

 

"That is inconsistent and illogical," Okazaki said as he pointed his finger at Past. "You will modify!"

 

Past grinned savagely. "Daleks do not take orders!"

 

"You have identified as Daleks!" Okazaki crossed his arms and smirked.

 

"Outline resembles the inferior species known as Cybermen!" Past matched his smirk.

 

Okazaki blinked. "...Enough of this!"

 

"Heh." Past shook his head. "You're a fan of old shows."

 

Okazaki shrugged. "Just the ones you would be familiar with."

 

Past frowned. "Who are you? Really?"

 

"You have to ask?" Okazaki snorted. "I'm you. A you from a few years in the future, slain, reborn, and slain again. And we have much to discuss."

 

Past blinked and glared at him. "...I suppose that we're going to be discussing a bridge you have for sale?"

 

"This is no joke," Okazaki said. "Oh, I'm aware it's difficult to believe-"

 

"I will admit you have done your research," Past said. "But as of yet, you've not said anything that would make me even think of buying something that inane."

 

"You are asking for proof, then?" Okazaki crossed his arms.

 

"I am going to humor you with one shot," Past replied. "So tell me the code phrase."

 

Okazaki sighed. "It's really sad that I actually thought I might need this."

 

"It's all the time travel movies," Past said. "Now then, go on. I'm all ears."

 

Okazaki said the code phrase.

 

Past blinked. Then he blinked again.

 

Okazaki noted he had frozen his face to prevent any stray emotion from leaking. _'Well, moment of truth.'_

 

"Hmm." Past crossed his arms. "I have to admit, that's somewhat compelling. On the other hand, if you have done so much research, maybe you would be able to make an educated guess as to what it is."

 

Okazaki sighed. "Are you saying that we went through the trouble of making a code phrase, and we're not going to use it?"

 

"That's about the size of it," Past admitted.

 

Okazaki shook his head. _'Well, I tried. Sadly, I'm not at all surprised at the end result. Damn my paranoid nature, anyway!'_

 

"I extended the offer as a courtesy," Past said. "I'm going to kill you now."

 

Okazaki snorted. "You stupid motherfucking prick. You're not only going to deny your own code phrase, but you're actually announcing that you're going to kill me? My god, was I always this foolish?" He grit his teeth. "No, it's not that, you're just so arrogant right now that you think you'll get away with fucking anything! All that power went straight to your thrice damned head!"

 

"Fool!" Past roared. "I will destroy you!"

 

"Insolent!" Okazaki countered. "You died a long time ago! You're just a dead man walking! Know your place!"

 

"You dare?!" yelled Past.

 

"Of course!" Okazaki did his best M. Bison impression. "Now, before we start tearing shit up, have just a small thing to take care of."

 

"And that is?" snarled Past.

 

"This," Okazaki said, and focused.

 

\----0----

 

Blue beyond blue, green beyond green. Balls of light, floating slowly upwards. An impossibly vibrant, impossibly real world. A 'real' so real it circled in upon itself and became surreal instead.

 

Okazaki crossed his arms and took a deep breath. Having a body in the realm was an unusual experience. He tilted his head back so he was looking down at Past.

 

Past looked around, eyes wide with alertness and confusion. Slowly, he turned his head toward Okazaki. "What... have you done?"

 

"Admitting you don't know what's going on?" Okazaki snorted and smirked. "That's unlike you. Where's that 'I know everything' attitude I've come to expect in myself?"

 

Past sneered, but didn't reply; instead, he continued to look around.

 

Okazaki waited patiently.

 

"...Curious," Past said after a few moments. "This reminds me of a dreamscape. And yet, that description doesn't seem to fit." He bent down and rubbed his hand on the grass. "Some people can feel things in their dream; I never possessed that ability, and yet here I am, touching this grass and plainly feeling it under my fingertips."

 

"The novelty wears off quickly," Okazaki said.

 

Past snorted and straightened himself. "A novelty that has already worn off is the fact that you have somehow rendered me down to this... single form. I must admit confusion about that."

 

"And doubtless some degree of fear," Okazaki observed.

 

Past gave Okazaki a withering glare. "Just because it is an unknown factor does not mean I fear it."

 

"You know what part of our problem is?" Okazaki crossed his arms behind his back and started to pace. "We never were too willing to admit weakness. And we were more than happy to do whatever was required to remove what we considered to be our weaknesses."

 

"What you consider a problem, I consider a strength," Past countered. "Perhaps my greatest strength, at that. I have lifted myself so far—"

 

"You lifted yourself to a false plateau," Okazaki said. "I will say that being able to face and correct weaknesses is a strength to an extent, but you went too far. You sold your humanity just so you would never know weakness again, and ironically, that became your weakness. You kept going and going, and soon all you could see was getting stronger, more powerful, how better to prevent threats to your person."

 

Past lips threatened to curl into a snarl. "If you are talking about my plan to take over the world, I will have you know—"

 

"That it's for the good of the people," Okazaki said with a roll of his eyes. "Yes, that's great, you'll help them out by killing a bunch of people."

 

Past stuck his finger out at Okazaki. "The ends justify—" He blinked.

 

"What's that?" Okazaki smirked. "Did you just realize you're morally bankrupt? Utopia justifies the means? Can't make an omelet without killing a few people? You did what you had to? Do go on."

 

Past frowned. "I'll admit that if you're trying to prove you're me, you're doing a fairly good job of it. I don't get this flavor of self-recrimination very often elsewhere."

 

"Still don't believe it, do you?" Okazaki shook his head. "I wonder if it would make a difference, even if you did. I know you, you're stubborn. It took me seeing everyone I cared for dying to get me out of that mindset."

 

Past tilted his head to the side and shrugged. "Well, yeah, you're probably right about that. You'd have to offer up some damn good proof or I'm not gonna buy it."

 

"I could offer you proof, but it would require a merger of memories," Okazaki said.

 

"Yeah, because I'm going to let you insert a malicious code into my mind or something," Past said. "Fat chance."

 

"Stubborn and paranoid, great combination," Okazaki said while shaking his head. "Son, I am disappoint."

 

"Whatever," Past said. "I've had enough of this discussion, and I still owe you a beatdown." He popped his knuckles.

 

"There's another thing that's wrong with us," Okazaki said as he fell into a defensive stance. "We can be entirely too showy."

 

\----0----

 

Past pushed forward, fist reared back.

 

Okazaki dodged to the side. The punch fell where he had been. He jabbed at Past's liver.

 

Past grunted. He spun himself and lashed his arm out for a backhanded blow.

 

Okazaki dodged back again.

 

Past punched the ground, spinning motion turned into a lunge.

 

Okazaki kicked Past in the face.

 

Past shook his head and smirked.

 

Okazaki blinked.

 

"You're weak," Past said.

 

Okazaki grit his teeth. _'What the hell? That should have done... something, anything!'_

 

_'I was afraid of this. He always had a lot more minds to go around than you did. In this sort of fight, that makes all the difference.'_

 

 _'Well that's great,'_ Okazaki thought.

 

Past interrupted his thoughts with a jab.

 

Okazaki almost dodged it. The skin of his cheek flayed away with the blow. _'Oh hell!'_ He leapt back.

 

Past walked forward, a savage grin on his face.

 

Okazaki jumped backwards. And again. _'Shit. He's playing with me. There's another thing that was wrong with me, if I got too confident I'd happily play with my enemy. Well, I'll just keep that one to myself for now.'_ He walked backward.

 

Past stalked forward. "What's the matter? This not going quite to your plan?"

 

"Plan A is looking a bit shaky," Okazaki admitted.

 

Past blinked. "...Interesting."

 

Okazaki grit his teeth. _'Well, that's great, let's just give away all our plans.'_

 

Past rushed forward.

 

Okazaki had barely enough time to register the movement before he found himself flying.

 

_|DIE|_

 

\----0----

 

 _'The sky is beautiful,'_ Okazaki thought as he watched the clouds whip past.

 

_'Okazaki, get a hold of yourself.'_

 

He tried to lift his arm. _'I feel like I could reach out and touch it.'_

 

_'Don't go into the sky.'_

 

He tried to blink. _'Why not? What good am I doing here? It'd be easier to just give up....'_

 

_'Get yourself together, man!'_

 

 _'It would be so easy to just die,'_ he thought. _'To let go.'_

 

_'Is this what you want?'_

 

 _'I want all of this to be over,'_ he thought. _'I'm so tired of this. I thought fighting was what I was supposed to be doing this whole time, but what has it gotten me?'_

 

_'You must keep fighting just a little more.'_

 

 _'Why? What's the point?'_ His eyes started to close.

 

_'Is that what she would want you to do?'_

 

 _'Huh?'_ He held his eyes open for a moment longer.

 

_'Would Kotomi want to see you die?'_

 

' _...Kotomi.'_ His eyes widened slightly. _'For a moment, I forgot her. I can't believe I forgot her.'_

 

_'Under the circumstance that you've just had your past self pile-drive you in the literal soul, I think it's understandable.'_

 

 _'Huh?'_ Okazaki raised his eyebrow slightly.

 

_'Never mind that. She wants you to return. To come back to her.'_

 

 _'She... wants me to return, to come back to her.'_ He opened his eyes again. _'That's right. I promised to come back if I could.'_

 

_'Hope isn't gone, not yet.'_

 

 _'He's so very powerful,'_ Okazaki thought. _'How can I hope to defeat him, and come back to her?'_

 

_'As long as you can still fight, there is hope.'_

 

 _'I was never particularly good with hope,'_ he thought with a smirk.

 

_'Well, while you're still alive, you can be stubborn. Will that suffice?'_

 

 _'Heh.'_ He opened his eyes. _'It'll have to work. Besides, I have someone to get back to._ '

 

_'That's the spirit.'_

 

Okazaki reunited with the ground. He skipped into and through a tree, and buried himself into a hill.

 

 _'Spirit or not, that hurt,'_ Okazaki thought as he spat out a clump of dirt.

 

_'Past is very powerful. He doesn't have much control over his attacks, however. He likely isn't yet used to the nature of fighting in this sort of realm.'_

 

 _'I'm not sure any of us could claim proficiency there,'_ he noted as he sat up, head protruding through the top of the small hill.

 

_'As you know, this is a land of emotion. Focus on them, and you will have a chance.'_

 

 _'As I know, my ass,'_ he observed. _'Could have really used that knowledge earlier.'_

 

_'...You didn't know?'_

 

_'We blocked him off.'_

 

_'I see.'_

 

_'An unforeseen circumstance. We'll have to work around it, it's too late now.'_

 

Okazaki pulled himself out of the hill and sat down with his feet in the hole he emerged from. _'How far did he send us, anyway?'_

 

_'Not very. A hundred meters or so, I think.'_

 

 _'What?'_ Okazaki blinked. _'It felt much longer than that.'_

 

_'Time is relative in these parts, even more so than in the real world. Particularly when you've been booked coach for a short flight on fist airlines.'_

 

 _'Great,'_ he thought as he looked around.

 

Past was walking slowly forward, no more than fifty meters away.

 

 _'Well shit,'_ Okazaki thought as he brushed at his form. _'I could probably have used more time to get myself together.'_

 

_'This isn't good.'_

 

_'No. I'm not sure he can defeat him like this.'_

 

 _'...So much for the morale boosting speech,'_ Okazaki thought.

 

Past was a little over forty meters away.

 

_'Well, you have any ideas, then?'_

 

_'A couple, none of them really good.'_

 

 _'Could just keep hitting him,'_ Okazaki thought. _'A bit like a boss fight; keep whittling him down.'_

 

_'He's faster than you. Considerably so.'_

 

 _'My plan is not without its flaws,'_ Okazaki reflected.

 

Past crossed the thirty meter point.

 

_'I see. There may be a way....'_

 

_'Well, I'm all ears then. So to speak.'_

 

 _'Likewise,'_ Okazaki thought.

 

_'Ushio?'_

 

Okazaki blinked. _'Other?'_

 

Past was less than twenty meters away.

 

_'She's not in here anymore.'_

 

 _'What do you mean, she's not in here anymore?'_ Okazaki grit his teeth. _'Where could she be?'_

 

_'While I hesitate to suggest the possibility, she may have abandoned us.'_

 

 _'What?'_ Okazaki's eyes widened. _'Wasn't she rather critical to this whole thing?'_

 

_'I believe she may be in the process of sealing the dimension. It's a good call, if so; I hope she succeeds.'_

 

 _'...I see.'_ Okazaki took a deep breath. _'So that's how it's to be.'_

 

_'It's still a victory. They're all safe.'_

 

 _'I was hoping to return.'_ Okazaki sighed and closed his eyes. _'So be it. So long as they make it through, it'll have been worth it.'_

 

_'I'm still up for trying to kick his ass, if you're game.'_

 

"Hell," Okazaki said as he pushed himself to his feet. "Why not?"

 


	40. An End To All Things, Part 2

Past stopped ten meters away from Okazaki. "An interesting choice of last words. But it's time to die."

 

"It is not his time," came a female voice. "Not just yet."

 

Okazaki raised an eyebrow. "Ushio?!"

 

 _'Ushio! What the bloody hell is she doing?!'_ came the Other's indignant thoughts.

 

Past raised an eyebrow.

 

"Okazaki," she said, as she walked toward Past. "You, or at least someone very much like you... did a great deal of things to a great many people, almost all of them unforgiveable. You may not have done as much as he, but you would have." She stopped a few feet in front of Past, whom looked down at her with a sneer. "I shouldn't forgive you. I really shouldn't. Or at least..." She turned her head to look at Okazaki with a sad smile. "That's what the Other would say."

 

Okazaki raised an eyebrow.

 

 _'What is she doing?!'_ ranted the Other. _'Without her, there's no way to carry out the backup plan! If we lose here....'_

 

"Look," Past interrupted, "can we hurry this up? Things to see, people to kill..."

 

"Time is meaningless here," Ushio stated as she turned toward Past. "This needs to be said."

 

Past raised an indignant eyebrow before he snorted and crossed his arms. "Whatever. Let me know when you're done."

 

"Thank you," Ushio said, and turned back to Okazaki. "He is right, though. It should have all been unforgiveable. And yet.... And yet, having seen into your head, I understand why you did what you did. I can't really hate you, knowing your motivations. I'm not saying it makes it right, but I do understand. And unlike you, I still remember how to do something that is an essential part of being a human being."

 

"I feel I should be insulted," Okazaki noted with a raised eyebrow.

 

"Okazaki kun," Ushio said, which prompted him to raise his other eyebrow. "I forgive you. I forgive you for everything that you have done."

 

"You.... You what?" Okazaki let his head fall to the side in shock.

 

She smiled a small, sad smile. "Just exercising my humanity, now that I've gotten it back." She turned to Past. "And you. I forgive you, too."

 

"That's... wonderful," Past said with a raised, suspicious eyebrow.

 

"Yes," she said as she took a step forward, prompting Past to raise his fists defensively and take a step backward, "yes it is." She held her arms out in front of her unthreateningly as she continued to walk forward.

 

Past regarded her warily as she wrapped her arms around him in a gentle hug.

 

"...Father... ...Mother... ...Ishikawa...," Ushio whispered, only the strange nature of the realm allowing Okazaki to hear her as she talked of her parents and husband. "I hope you can forgive me for this... I know you thought he was a monster... but it's necessary."

 

Past blinked as Ushio's hold became tighter, and began trying, futily, to push her away.

 

"I'm coming home," Ushio sobbed as she began to shine, a brilliant, unearthly light obscuring Past's continued attempts to push her off.

 

A sudden flash, a burst of sound. Okazaki momentarily couldn't see. When his sight readjusted, he noted that only Past remained.

 

Past was clutching at where Ushio had hugged him, a pained grimace on his face. He fell onto his knees, then flopped down to let his forehead smack the ground with a groan.

 

Okazaki could see wisps of emotion trailing off of Past, the result of grievous wounds to his very soul. He could imagine what it must be like. Okazaki, as Past, had never really expected to be forgiven. He had hoped that he would, through his actions, make the world an overall better place, but he still hadn't expected forgiveness. After all, it wasn't something he had ever been able to properly do himself.

 

And then, someone who he or someone very much like himself had raped the mind of, had forgiven him. And then, without a hint of true malice so far as Okazaki could detect, she had ceased her existence just to see that he was stopped. An unavoidable, painful truth, that all attempts Past made to wrap his mind around just caused threads of his reasoning, and thus his entire moral underpinning, to unravel in threads of pure soulstuff.

 

Sometimes forgiving was the worst thing you can do to a person, it seemed.

 

He couldn't help but let out a small chuckle. "Ushio.... Heh." He shook his head. "Forgiveness, huh? Well. Under the circumstances... I guess I forgive you, too." He blinked, and then smirked as he noted a presence behind him. "You, on the other hand.... Not so much."

 

The Other was ancient. Mental scars traced their way over his incorporeal body, jagged unhealed gashes that crossed each other like a billion lethal encounters. He was surrounded by a cloud of barely contained fury, which occasionally snapped down like a rabid beast and reopened a wound that had been trying to close. It seemed as though only a core of stubbornness even held his form together, which Okazaki supposed was probably exactly right.

 

"Heh, that Ushio," the Other said with a smirk. "Always messing up my plans. It's funny, really. Heh. Maybe it's for the best, though."

 

Okazaki snorted. "More and more, I'm thinking having our plots derailed is a good thing." As the Other walked past him, Okazaki's head began to fill with strange, half-formed ideas; ways to bend and manipulate a soul, from within and without. Along with it came a sudden realization. "You experimented on souls?"

 

"Of course," said the Other. "An eternity in a timeless realm with nothing but souls around? What did you think I would end up doing?"

 

Okazaki sighed. "I'm not sure why I even asked. You're a sick, depraved little man."

 

"Perhaps," the Other agreed with a shrug and an amused smile, before his face took on a more serious expression. "...She's a nice girl, isn't she?"

 

Okazaki blinked, and then nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, she really is."

 

Past began to push himself upward as he slowly tried to come to terms with having been forgiven, shuddering as he did so.

 

"Huh," the Other said as he approached Past, "Never thought I'd see the day." He shook his head as his arms began morph into what appeared to Okazaki to be octopus tentacles. Where the suckers would normally be, there were wicked barbs that dripped a vile looking black substance. "Can't say we deserve it. Heh. Don't screw up, alright?"

 

Okazaki snorted again. "Considering our track record, sound advice."

 

"Indeed," the Other said, and leapt forward. The barbed tentacles buried themselves deeply in Past's back

 

Past roared in pain as the Other forcibly merged with him, and then fell onto his back again. The raging beast of hatred that had torn at the Other now swarmed Past like an army of ants, pulling and tearing at his weaknesses. It was the truth of hatred; hatred of himself, hatred of his deeds.

 

But hatred was something Past was used to. Ultimately it could only fuel him. Still, in the short term it would make him weaker, particularly while he was still dealing with impossible to understand forgiveness.

 

"..Goodbye, me." Okazaki said as he gave a tired salute.

 

Past writhed on the ground, clawing at his flesh.

 

Okazaki stumbled forward a few steps before running forward. _'Emotions. That's the key.'_

 

Past saw him coming and raised his arm to block.

 

Okazaki leapt over him and landed on his back.

 

Past let out a pained gasp.

 

Okazaki fell backward, elbow out. He landed it on the base of Past's neck. _|IMAGE OF FUJIBAYASHI RYOU LAYING ON SCHOOL FLOOR, DEAD THANKS TO LASER TO HEAD, ACCOMPANIED BY HORROR AT THE EVENT|_

 

Past wheezed into the sod.

 

Okazaki punched him in the neck repeatedly. _|IMAGE OF KYOU'S FACE AS SHE SAW HER DEAD SISTER|_

 

Past flung him off his back.

 

Okazaki rolled into the landing and came up on his feet.

 

Past stood up and glared murderously at Okazaki.

 

Okazaki leapt forward, fist back for a punch.

 

Past pulled his own fist back.

 

The two punched each other in the face nearly simultaneously _. |IMAGE OF SAKAGAMI TOMOYO, CRUSHED UNDER PILLAR, FEELINGS OF HOPELESSNESS|_ / _|DIEDIEDIE|_

 

Past stumbled backward.

 

Okazaki reeled slightly. He shook his head.

 

Tendrils of raw emotions started to pull away from both of them.

 

Past roared and rushed forward.

 

Okazaki dodged to the side and tripped him. _'Ah good, he's mad. I fight sloppy when mad.'_

 

Past hit the ground. He rolled himself onto his feet. "DIE ALREADY!"

 

"IS THAT ALL YOU HAVE?" Okazaki jumped forward. He punched at Past's solar plexus.

 

Past grabbed Okazaki and headbutted him. _|KILL|_

 

Okazaki rabbit punched Past in the throat. _|IMAGE OF KYOU AFTER ACCIDENTALLY KILLING BOTAN, REVULSION AT OWN STRENGTH|_

 

Past made a choking noise as he leapt back.

 

The air started to become hazy from the broken strands of emotion pulled from the two.

 

Okazaki leapt forward and headbutted him. _|IMAGE OF KOTOMI'S SKELETON, NUMBNESS|_

 

Past stumbled backward for a moment and shook his head.

 

Okazaki extended his arm, letting all the raw emotion and soulstuff that had been torn free coalesce around his finger. With an almost audible snap, his arm, up almost to the elbow, took the form of a giant drill bit.

 

"Oh _shit_ ," Past exclaimed, eyes wide. He knew where this was going. They had both seen the Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann movies, after all.

 

"Yeah," Okazaki said, and drove the drill into Past's midsection.

 

\----0----

 

The drill slowly started to sink into Okazaki's arm. He stared down at the ground, unable to move. _'Is... is it over? Is he dead? He'd better be, I think. I don't think I have anything left.'_

 

He heard a groan behind him.

 

 _'Oh hell,'_ Okazaki thought. _'He's still alive.'_

 

"Fu...ck," Past said, a strange note to his voice.

 

 _'Plus side, he doesn't sound good,'_ Okazaki thought. _'Okay. Let's turn around. Baby steps, baby steps....'_ He turned in place slowly.

 

Past lay on the ground. Severed strands of emotion and soulstuff only partially obscured the giant hole in his torso.

 

"Why...." Okazaki wheezed. "Why won't you die?"

 

"Stubb-" Past coughed violently. "-orn."

 

"Naturally," Okazaki said as he put his foot forward in Past's direction.

 

"I hate you," Past said as more strands started to pull away from his body. "So much."

 

"Yeah," Okazaki observed tiredly, watching wisps of shattered dreams and mindless rage dissipate into the aether as he took another step. "What else is new."

 

Past pushed himself onto his side, and immediately lapsed into a coughing fit.

 

Okazaki stumbled and fell in front of him. He pushed himself up on his hands and crawled forward.

 

Past snarled weakly and held out his arm wardingly.

 

Okazaki batted it aside and grabbed Past's head. "You know, I think I can use you."

 

Past raised his arm just high enough that his upraised middle finger was visible.

 

Okazaki snorted and pulled up.

 

Past's head pulled away almost too easily, the damage to his form sufficient to keep him from maintaining cohesion.

 

Unceremoniously, Okazaki sat up and plopped the head on his shoulder. It started to bond in place. His other hand stabbed into Past's torso. He wasn't entirely sure what he was doing, but it seemed like what he was supposed to do; something left over from Other, he guessed.

 

Past's torso started to be drawn into Okazaki's hand. As it did so, he started to feel stronger and stronger.

 

 _'Huh.'_ Okazaki looked down as Past's body shrank.

 

"This is a strange perspective," Past's head said.

 

"Tell me about it," Okazaki said.

 

"So you got me, a head in a jar," Past said with a sigh. "What now?"

 

"Battle thrall," Okazaki said simply. "Sparring partner."

 

"...Heh." Past smirked. "You realize if you give me the opportunity, I'm going to wreck your shit?"

 

"Do so, and I'll finish absorbing you," Okazaki said. "I may still anyway. After I get sick of fighting."

 

"Could be a while," Past said. "Well. As long as I have the opportunity for vengeance."

 

Okazaki looked over at the head on his shoulder. "You seem... different than I was."

 

"I just lost most of my emotions," Past observed. "All I have left is hate, I think. Heh. In fact, now that I think about it, if I refused to fight, that would really put a crux in your plan."

 

Okazaki stared hard at the smirking head on his shoulder. _'This is a really stupid idea, anyway.'_ He forced some of his desire to fight in the head, before he tore it off and slammed it into the ground, where it exploded in a shower of impotent fury. He stared at the small crater it left in the dirt.

 

"Well, got some use out of you in the end anyway, didn't I?" He rubbed at the sealing emotional wound on his shoulder. "Maybe now I won't feel like having a row at the world so much." He sighed and looked up at the sky again. "It really is pretty. But I think I'll leave you behind. There's someone I have to get back to."

 

Wordlessly, he shimmered and disappeared.

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A Note From The Author:**

 

So there we have it. The end of Past, Other, Ushio, and their wacky time travel hijinks. As you might imagine, this is a sign this story is drawing to a close. Fear not though, there is another chapter in the works!

 

Which brings me to a slight downside. I’m not sure when I will be able to wrap things up, exactly; circumstances have conspired against me to make finishing things a problematic affair. C’est la vie, I suppose, but there it is.

 

Anyway, in case you missed it, I’m still hoping that there are some of you who would be willing to do me the favor of seeing my friend’s radio show. From 5:00 P.M. to 7:00 P.M. (EST) every Wednesday and Saturday, you can tune in to "dj gamera. caster. fm" (remove the spaces) for a show. It’s live, and he does requests! Both he and I would be grateful if you were to drop in and give him a listen.

 

Also, in the interest of shamelessly plugging other people’s stuff, if you were to read NightmareHeartx’s “Discovery,” you would be reading a better story than this one. So you should read it! It’s even actually a Clannad story!

 

Well, that’s all I have for now. Cheers, all!


	41. To The Future (Epilogue)

**A Note From The Author:**

 

So this is effectively the last official chapter of the story. And it’s a bit short; in fact, this is the whole thing. More of an epilogue really, but there it is. This is also likely the last story I will be writing, for a variety of reasons. Still, for those whom have read this big pile of—well, for those whom have read this, thanks for reading!

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

_'Kyou has aged well,'_ Okazaki thought as he approached where she was sitting, a bench along the path to the high school where everything had really began again. _'Twenty years, and she doesn't look a day older. And she's not even had her body replaced or worked on. Funny how the genetic lottery works.'_

 

Kyou looked up from her hands as he sat down next to her. "Ah. Hello, Okazaki."

 

Okazaki winced. "Ouch. So formal, Fujibayashi?"

 

Her eyes tightened slightly. "Considering how things have went, how else should I be approaching you?"

 

He took a deep breath of air. "The collapse?"

 

"The collapse," she confirmed as she slouched back in the seat, upper arms draped across the back of the bench.

 

"That wasn't... entirely my fault," he said as he scratched his cheek. "I didn't think it'd fold nearly that easily."

 

"Well, it did," she replied evenly. "People have died, you know."

 

"...I know," Okazaki replied tiredly. "I've done my best to retrieve them, but... many do not want to come back."

 

Kyou looked at him from the corner of her eye. "That's another thing. The knowledge that there is an afterlife was unsettling for a lot of people."

 

"Tell me something I don't know," he replied, slightly snidely.

 

"Well, that's not particularly easy, is it?" She snorted. "Let's see, you pretty much know everything. You can pretty much do anything. You're bringing people back from death. Are you trying to play G—"

 

"Don't go there," he said firmly. "I am _very_ not qualified. In fact, the collapse is just a sign of that, don't you think?"

 

"Isn't it what you wanted?" She glared at him full-on. "I know you wanted to get rid of the whole system."

 

"No! Not like this!" He waved his hands defensively. "Like I said, I thought it'd stand up better than it did!"

 

She frowned. "You still had everything in place though, didn't you? I'll admit, it didn't descend into anarchy, but that's only because you were expecting it."

 

"Look, I'll admit I had contingency plans in place," Okazaki replied with a shrug. "I have contingency plans for damn near everything. Hell, that's pretty much my schtick. Doesn't mean that they're optimal solutions. Frankly, I was hoping to nudge the whole mess in the right direction; not my fault the whole thing was like a game of Jenga right before the last move."

 

Kyou rolled her eyes. "You can _not_ tell me you didn't see this coming."

 

He took a deep breath. The troubling fact was, he hadn't quite seen it coming. Oh, he'd known that he'd have to be careful, that the system was teetering, but he'd thought he could keep it stable. No such luck, though. At least the new equilibrium was stable, although it left him in the now awkward, and frankly undesired position of effectively ruling the world. He was still trying to decide how to best foist the task onto someone else.

 

"And even if you somehow didn't," she continued, her fist balled, "isn't that somehow even worse? You've got the entirety of humanity in your hands now. Can you really afford to make mistakes like that?"

 

"No, no I can't," he replied tiredly, before he let out a bitter chuckle. "This isn't what I wanted, you know. Oh, it's what I wanted, once, but then... well. I saw how that turned out."

 

She opened her mouth to reply, before she paused and frowned. "I don't suppose you would like to give an explanation to the rest of the class?"

 

"Not really, frankly," he said. The full truth of the alternate timelines was something he would probably take to the grave with him, assuming he ever actually died again. "Let's just say that I've learned from my mistakes." He snorted. "Pity I'm still making new ones."

 

"Hm." She shrugged and looked up to the sky silently.

 

He sighed and looked up as well, thoughts of years passed tracing through his head. Things had changed after he had defeated his past. His return had been almost anti-climactic, really; he'd simply found himself back in his bodies, including the bodies his past self had at one time occupied. He'd taken the opportunity to gleefully drop in on his friends from the past, nearly reduced to tears by seeing them.

 

He'd also enjoyed his homecoming in Hikarizaka. Although he'd ended up fully expelled after playing the bagpipes in the middle of school grounds, the fact that he'd made it back at all more than made up for that. He celebrated by asking Kotomi out on a proper date after classes let out.

 

The next few days had been an adventure of their own. Challenging Akio to a game of baseball as an odd sort of apology. The dinner and dissection date with Kotomi. Silently replacing the government of North Korea as his single concession to his old ways.

 

The next few weeks had been a bit quieter. More dates with Kotomi. Starting a few companies to sell high-quality merchandise at exceedingly low prices. Initiating a big environmental cleanup project, in secret.

 

The next few years had been spent almost in a sort of stasis. Kotomi and him adventuring the solar system, almost as like a honeymoon after they got married a year after his return. Slowly replacing the world's manufactories with his own, offering those who ended up jobless because of it various types of work while encouraging more personal projects. Developing a way to transfer souls to bodies again from the other world based on what Ushio and the Other had done.

 

"So how is Kotomi doing?" Kyou's voice interrupted his musings.

 

"She's doing quite well actually," Okazaki replied with a slight smile. "We've been busy exploring the other world." _'And doing all sorts of science._ ' At least the Other had negated the need to experiment on souls; neither of them wanted to do that, though it had come up a few times between them. He suppressed a frown as "Operation Paperclip" came to mind. _'Dammit, Other. Just knowing I might've been capable of that, I'll never quite feel clean.'_

 

"You know, no matter how many times you call it that, it's still the afterlife," she observed with a roll of her eyes, again disrupting his thoughts. "A rose by any other name would smell just as sweet."

 

"Afterlife, then," he said with a shrug. "What's in a name, after all?"

 

She snorted. "Either way, is she really so busy that she can't talk to her good friend Kyou?"

 

"I don't know if I'd call it 'busy' exactly, but she's really latched onto the whole concept, and has been trying to breach the walls to other universes through the... afterlife." He blinked. "See, this is why I like to call it the other world. Calling it the afterlife just makes these conversations sound silly."

 

Kyou wrinkled her nose. "I guess it does." She rapidly shook her head. "Still, you should tell her to talk to me sometime!"

 

He blinked, and then did just that.

 

"...Ah, Kyou-chan," Kotomi said as she appeared to grow from the ground, "I'm sorry! I've been so caught up in our work, that I forgot to talk to you!" She appeared to be nearly in tears.

 

"A-ah, that's... that's okay, Kotomi-chan," Kyou said, very obviously caught off guard as she waved her hands in front of her defensively. "I know you're busy up there and everything, so...."

 

 _'Again with the "heaven" imagery,'_ Okazaki thought as he suppressed the urge to roll his eye while the two girls caught up with each other. He frowned as he looked skyward again. Although he had searched far, and for a long period of time, he had never located Naoyuki's soul. As far as he could tell, he'd probably departed from both worlds entirely, to parts still unknown even to him. Much as had most people through history he'd found, including Kotomi's parents.

 

For not the first time, he found himself pondering the nature of that realm. The best description for it seemed to be "limbo," a sort of temporary refuge for souls. He'd thought at first that it was a temporary refuge for those who weren't ready to pass on, but over time he'd ended up realizing that everyone who died ended up there. Then they rose toward the sky.

 

He had no idea what happened after that point. He'd even detached a portion of his soul to go investigate, but it never returned, so far as he could tell. The action had left him feeling somewhat drained; an effect that seemed to be permanent, and as such he hadn't repeated it. After sharing his findings with Kotomi, she had doubly agreed that a repeat shouldn't be attempted. Not to say that they hadn't tried other methods, of course.

 

FOR SCIENCE, and all that.

 

At that thought, Okazaki looked over at the two of them.

 

"...You should come visit there sometime," Kotomi breathed. "It's very beautiful there."

 

"I think I'll have to pass," Kyou said, a forced smile on her face.

 

"...Oh," Kotomi said, disappointed. "Well, if you ever change your mind, please tell me! Here," she produced what appeared to be a simm card, "this will let you call me if you ever want to talk to me!" She smiled. "Please call!"

 

"Huh?" Okazaki blinked and looked at the card. "What's this, then? You've cracked the metaphysical to physical problem?" _'And so refined, too. Tisk! She's been hiding that, hasn't she?'_ He couldn't help but be amused.

 

Kotomi gasped and blushed, secret exposed. "...I did. But I was saving the revelation for our anniversary...." She pouted and looked down.

 

Okazaki sighed and smiled as he wrapped her up in a hug. "Hey, it's alright. It's pretty close to that time anyway... let's call it an early present?"

 

Kotomi nodded after a moment with a smile. "...Okay."

 

"Thatta girl," Okazaki said, and kissed her on the forehead.

 

Kotomi giggled slightly before she pulled out of his hug. "...I'll see you on the other side?"

 

"Sure," Okazaki replied.

 

Kotomi nodded before she pulled Kyou into an embrace. "...I'll talk to you later, Kyou chan."

 

Kyou chuckled and hugged Kotomi back. "Sure thing, Kotomi chan."

 

Kotomi smiled wide before she dissolved into nothing, the foglets that comprised her temporary form spreading into the environment once again.

 

Kyou blinked and then shook her head. "I'm not sure I'll ever get used to that sort of thing."

 

"The foglets?" Okazaki waved around the air.

 

"Yeah," she replied with a shudder. "It scares me to know that those things are more or less everywhere nowadays."

 

"Hey, they got rid of all the extra greenhouse gasses most effectively," he said with a shrug. "And all the pollutants, harmful bacteria and viruses, so on and so forth. Plus, if you need something, you just have to say the word."

 

"Still creepy to the max," she said, before she waved the matter off. "So your anniversary's coming up? I thought that wasn't for a few months?"

 

"Not the marriage anniversary," he clarified. "The anniversary of the first time I took her to the... afterlife." He looked askance.

 

"The other world, you mean," she said with a smirk.

 

"Right," Okazaki agreed readily. "Though, you know, speaking of anniversaries, how are things going with your janitor?"

 

Kyou opened her eyes wide in surprise with a blush. "W-where did you hear that?"

 

"Oh, a friend of a friend of a friend," he said. "...Furukawa."

 

"Damn, she just can't keep things to herself," she muttered.

 

"Still can't believe she ended up with Sunohara," he observed. "Now there's a pair I wouldn't have expected. Maybe him and Tomoyo, maybe her and that one boy that always hangs out around the breadshop, but the two of them together?" He shook his head and chuckled. "Hope it goes well for 'em."

 

She leaned back in the bench. "Speaking of Tomoyo, is she still running the circuit in America?"

 

"She passed on to the European Union actually, I believe," Okazaki said. _'She's been trying to stay under the radar I think, though she's not exactly been doing so very well.'_ He had to resist the urge to rub his nose. _'At least she's only preaching passive resistance; though she doesn't have too many listeners, it seems. Pity, really; I'd let 'em have the world back. Or rather, throw it at them and run screaming, I think.'_

 

"She's got a pretty good handful of followers," Kyou noted.

 

"Yeah," he replied sadly. "Are you one?"

 

"Yes," she admitted.

 

"I figured as much," he said. "You two share the same sorts of views. I wish she'd talk to me once in a while, but...." He shrugged.

 

"But she hates your guts," she finished for him.

 

"...That's about the size of it," he admitted. _'Particularly after the collapse, it seems.'_ She'd even started to hit every form of his in the face when she saw one. It was disheartening, but he could understand why, at least. _'That being said, that gives me something of an idea....'_

 

"Her brother's apparently dating Fukou," she said.

 

"So I heard," he replied. "I may or may not have introduced them."

 

She smirked. "Playing matchmaker on top of everything else?"

 

Okazaki raised an eyebrow. "So how's Ryou and her runner beau doing, again?"

 

"Touche," Kyou replied.

 

He chuckled, before he turned to give her a serious look. "Hey, have you ever thought about ruling the world?"

 

Her eyebrow twitched. "Oh hell no, don't you even dare try to put that on me."

 

"Hah! Well, how about just playing advisor, then?" He smirked. "I could really use some outside opinions on how to clean up this damn mess."

 

She balked. "Are you serious?"

 

"Deathly serious," he replied. "Admittedly, you'll probably do best advising me about matters of education, but still."

 

She blinked and put her finger to her chin. "That's... actually not a bad idea." She turned so that she could look him in the eye. "Making some sort of advisory board?"

 

"Heh. Clever," Okazaki said with a chuckle. "Yes, that's it exactly."

 

"...You're insane, you know," Kyou replied, eyebrow raised.

 

"Clearly," he returned. "What do you say, even so?"

 

She regarded him for a long moment, before she shrugged and smiled. "I'll think about it."

 

"That's all I ask," he replied as he turned to look at one of the trees.

 

She snorted. "And what of Tomoyo?"

 

"I wouldn't mind her as an advisor either," Okazaki replied. "At the very least, she will almost certainly be able to provide contradictory opinions on... pretty much everything." He couldn't help but chuckle at the thought.

 

"I guess I'll just have to let her know that," Kyou said with a smirk.

 

He looked over at her from the corner of his eye, legitimately a little surprised. "Been in contact with her, then?"

 

She nodded, but didn't volunteer anything else.

 

"Heh." He shook his head and looked up at the sky again. "Well, that's your business, I think."

 

"Mmm," she replied. "Well, it's been nice talking to you, Tomoya. But I should get home, I think."

 

"Aye?" Okazaki glanced over at her before he smiled and nodded, happy she was apparently back on first name basis with him. "Well, suit yourself, Kyou. Say hi to Botan for me, would you?"

 

Kyou's eye twitched slightly again as she stood up. "Yeah, sure, I'll do that." She nodded to him and began to walk away.

 

He regarded her for a moment before looking out at the pathway again. As he did, he realized something. _'Huh. This is actually pretty much right where things started, isn't it? Things began to change, here. And now, it feels like things are ending here. Or perhaps beginning again.'_

 

He chuckled to himself and stood. _'Well, I suppose that's just how life is. There may be an end to all things, but to all things there is also a beginning. Hopefully the next iteration of things will be brighter than the past.'_ He raised his arm to the sky, and foglets formed a glass in his hand.

 

"To the future," he said, and took a sip.

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**Another Note From The Author:**

 

...So when I said this was the end of the story, I... well, okay, I told the truth there, but I still have a little more to post! Sort of an omake, really; gonna post a few chunks of things that I had planned and think are kinda neat, but that never quite made it into the story. Not really sure anyone’ll be interested in that, but it’ll be there to read if they are. That said, it’s gonna all be in one single chapter thing, without any of the usual formatting, and likely of low quality. Read at your own risk, I suppose.

 

Until then!


	42. Omake Theater:  What Could Have Been

**A Note From The Author:**

 

Alright, this is gonna be a bit different than my normal chapters, namely because it’s not really a chapter. It’s also gonna be rather long, but eh, whatever. Anyway, this is all stuff essentially from my scrapbook of ideas; or rather, from my text file of ideas. Same thing, right? Figured I would share the interesting bits out of that; or at least, what I thought was interesting, as I suppose mileage may well vary. Anyway, I’m going to be sort of peppering this with thoughts as I go along, just because... well, just because. If you see something in parentheses, that’s me inserting a thought. Not something I’d do in a normal chapter, but there it is. Anyway.

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

(This part is one of the first drafts for the first fight between Past and Okazaki. It’s short on detail.)

 

Melee combat between two cyborgs had been rare, ranged weapons always having the advantage even over the brute strength that a cyborg could demonstrate. However, when it did happen, it was invariably incredibly brutal, the inhuman strength coupled with the layered redundancies built into even infiltration style drones such as the two cyborgs prevented a clean fight; even injuries that would be instantly fatal to an unaugmented human wouldn't stop or even slow down a proper combat cyborg, a fact that had allowed him victory against unaugmented human forces time and time again even during his most spectacular foul-ups.

 

Even lesser models like the cyborgs now locked in combat were guaranteed to fight a protracted, messy fight. An arm finally succumbs to repeated abuses and comes off in the hand of the enemy. The stump is rammed into the enemy's torso and enough electricity to power a laser designed to be able to burn through the rear armor of a main battle tank courses through the opposing cyborg, shorting out enough systems for long enough time to allow a free kick in, backed by the thrust of a rocket booster to burn away more sensitive surface systems. Whichever cyborg left standing wouldn't be combat capable afterward, resulting in a phyrric victory for the winner.

 

This fight would be no different, Okazaki suspected as he attempted to socket the arm back in place while his former self gave him a metallic grin riminiscent of a skeleton's grin, the flesh having burned away from his rocket enhanced kick to reveal the steel alloy skull underneath, a number of broken off knifes protruding from it where he had stabbed them in earlier. The arm clicked into place with the help of internal waldos while he jumped back to avoid a punitive strike. Another knife slide itself into his hand and he used it, aiming to blind his former self again and hopefully get some free shots in. He would win this fight. That much he remembered. Surviving the fight, on the other hand was in doubt, not that it mattered much ultimately.

 

 

 

(Meanwhile, this is the next to last draft of that same piece. Longer on detail, but ultimately scrapped a few bits from it. Will look rather familiar, even so.)

 

His past self used the hand he had been reaching to it with to send a backhanded blow toward Okazaki.

 

Okazaki tilted his head back to avoid the blow. It still clipped him in the chin with enough force to give his jaw an unnatural bend to the left. His cheeks exploded as small bullets came out of hidden barrels within his head.

 

The bullets stitched an angry red line across his past self's eyes, scoring gouges into the plexiglass corneas and obscuring his vision.

 

Click-click-click.

 

The small ammunition supply ran dry to Okazaki's cheek mounted guns.

 

The machete bounced off of his past self's shoulder. The tip of it knicked his skin as it bounced.

 

His past self's head tilted up slightly. Two tiny cameras poked out of the skin of his neck. Vision restored, he reared his left fist back for a punch.

 

Okazaki jabbed again. This time not with the intent of knocking away the machete. The handle hit Okazaki's right palm.

 

His past self's left hand darted out to punch the limb away.

 

Okazaki let the momentum of the punch tilt his right side backward.

 

They finally reunited fully with the ground near the gate of the school. They leapt again.

 

His past self tried to get distance from Okazaki.

 

Okazaki scythed down with his past self's blade. The triangular wedge on the tip of the machete came down on his past self where the neck and collarbone of an ordinary human would meet.

 

His past self punched at the side of the machete while Okazaki reared up to kick his past self in the chest. Both hits landed at almost the same time.

 

But his past self was somewhat slower and less agile than Okazaki's more refined model. The kick ripped the machete backward, the tip catching slightly on frontal armour plate. The plate cracked where Okazaki kicked.

 

The machete itself was made of an X-ray transparent crystal. It shattered under his past self's blow. But it had served Okazaki's purpose.

 

His past self flew through the concrete wall beside the school gate and into one of the sakura trees. He snarled at Okazaki. Compressed air jets in his legs propelled him toward Okazaki. He brought his fist up.

 

Okazaki bent to the side slightly. The fist had been aimed at what he had thought at the time to be Okazaki's reactor. It went straight through Okazaki's torso. He grunted in pain. He countered with a fist directly to his past self's shoulder joint.

 

His past self let out a pained, infuriated cry. He self spun out of control into one of the trees on the campus proper. His arm was gone.

 

Okazaki spun for a moment from the momentum. His past self's arm was lodged in his torso. Thermite from the arm began to burn at his insides painfully. He stopped spinning with a puff of compressed air. Chemical rockets in his back activated.

 

His past self had almost recovered. He turned back to see Okazaki's fist looming large in his vision.

 

The fist met little resistance as it smashed, then sheared off his past self's head.

 

His past self slumped over, the main controlling brain pulverized. It was a temporary inconvenience. But it bought Okazaki enough time to pull his past self's arm from his torso.

 

His past self recovered. He leapt at Okazaki.

 

Okazaki was faster. His past self had sacrificed too much speed to be good at melee against him. Okazaki hit his ruined shoulder.

 

His past self spiraled to the ground. He stood up and began trying to retreat from where he came from.

 

Okazaki's lower torso exploded outward. Five barrels, each holding a .50 BMG round, oriented themselves toward his past self. One barrel stopped moving prematurely. Thermite from his past self's arm had fused the motivator.

 

With a deafening bang, all five rounds fired at once. Four of them hit their target. His past self's knee is sheared away. One continued on.

 

His past self flopped back down to the ground. He started trying to hobble away on one good leg and one good arm.

 

Okazaki landed on his back, forcing him back to the ground. He used his remaining arm to push himself over, trying to dislodge Okazaki.

 

Okazaki let him roll. It made Okazaki fall. As he fell, he brought his elbow up. The last remaining fuel in the chemical rockets in his back ensured there was enough force.

 

Okazaki's elbow fell straight onto the crack in the armour. The fusion reaction was halted as armour plate crumpled the reactor itself.

 

His past self simply exploded. The brain, nestled near the reactor rather than in the head, was pulverized. At the loss of a signal from his mind to machine interface, the remains of his body started to burn. It was a measure to keep his technology from being reverse engineered; thermite rendered his remains into pools of molten metal, crystal, and carbon ash.

 

Okazaki was blown backward. He landed on his back, the elbow he used to kill the drone now broken. He grinned wildly, even as he reached over to cradle his injured limb.

 

 

 

(Another draft from the same section. As you might guess, this took a lot of reworking.)

 

Five standard .50 BMG shells were all he could hold. It would be all he needed. The first round merely dented armor inward. The second deepened the dent. The third forced open a small hole in the armor. The fourth burst through, shattering a layer of internal armor around his opposite's fusion core. The fifth opened a hole in the reactor chamber, not quite big enough to halt the fusion reaction taking place. The piercing note of his sonic cannon however was more than enough to peal the armor and casing back and render the reactor nonfunctional, as well as shredding internal components as chunks of armor flew out and imbedded themselves in critical internal systems. Okazaki's front teeth were the proverbial insult to injury as the force of the sonic blast from his mouth mounted cannon ripped them out to pelt his former self in the face, along with parts of his tongue. Okazaki ignored that and leveled the arm based laser cannon at the braincase of his former self's dying drone.

 

"Good," he said, shattered jaw and destroyed tongue unnecessary to speak. "But not good enough." The laser cannon melted through the cranial armor to boil the drone's brain and transmitter at once.

 

Finishing it off like that would irritate his past self. A few more pushes and it would push his past self into full on anger; and when he was angry he made mistakes, acted rashly and generally ended up making a hash of things. It had hastened things, he recalled; he'd only realized what it had done to him too late.

 

 

 

(A lot...)

 

There was no way either of them could be mistaken for human anymore. Okazaki no longer had a head, instead two waldos poked out of his neck to provide vision. At least he still had one of his arms though. His opposite lacked arms, not to mention most of its torso; though its head remained, it flopped uselessly on top of a broken metal spine that snaked down behind the cracked metal spheroid that composed its reactor shielding. One of its arms was stuck in Okazaki's torso, where it had managed to punch through a crack in Okazaki's chest armor only to be rewarded for its efforts by Okazaki shredding the arm apart at the shoulder. Though it hadn't been for lack of trying, both cyborgs still had their legs mostly in one piece. Crippled legs would have made the cyborg damaged in such a way practically a sitting target; other parts were sacrificed instead to prevent this occurrance. Both wore shredded artificial muscle and shattered armor plate as like clothing, fabric and even biologically reinforced skin having long since been utterly demolished by the fury of their fight.

 

Okazaki couldn't close in to finish the job. Attempting to do so resulted in a severe electric shock, enough to reset now unshielded primary systems and allow it to kick him away. Similarly there was little that his opposite could do, having sacrificed all possible means of retaliation to stave off being finished outright. Okazaki had held back however. He ripped the mechanical arm wedged in his torso out, unwedging the armor panel covering his final weapon. Five standard .50 BMG shells were all it could hold.

 

 

 

(...of revising.)

 

He leapt as his internal reactor flared up to nearly maximum output. His past self looked up toward the sound of shattered glass and caught the sight of the reactor powering up on his thermal sensors. Time slowed down for both of them as the right side of his past self's back burst open to present his main onboard weapon; a laser cannon designed to burn through tank treads and light armor. Okazaki's hand came down on the front of it just as it fired. It burnt through the reinforced metal of his finger almost as if it wasn't there, and he heard screaming from the classroom he had jumped from. That had happened in his memories too; he hoped it wasn't anyone he knew, and instantly felt a measure of shame at the thought as the laser cannon supports broke under the strain of 320 kilograms of artificial muscle and metal landing upon it. It smashed to the ground uselessly as Okazaki bodychecked his past self, forcing him to lean back and use his legs as springs to absorb Okazaki's impact.

 

His past self used the position it found itself in to jump backward, even as Okazaki leapt forward in in eerie syncronization with his past self's. His past self's right shoulder exploded upward with a pneunomatic hiss, the special hooked machete held within his shoulder ripping through his clothes as he reached for it with his right hand. The quickest of jabs by Okazaki to the handle of the machete sent it flipping just out of his past self's reach. His past self used the hand he had been reaching to it with to send a backhanded blow toward Okazaki. A right toe to the ground tilted Okazaki just out of reach of the blow even as the machete bounced off of the shoulder of Okazaki's past self. It had only spun half a turn in that time, and the newfound momentum it picked up from the bounce spun it backwards faster, the handle hitting Okazaki's right palm as his past self's left hand darted out to punch it away.

 

Okazaki let the momentum of the punch tilt his right side backward as they finally reunited fully with the ground near the gate of the school. They leapt again, his past self trying to get distance from Okazaki, whom scythed down with his past self's blade, the triangular wedge on the tip of the blade coming down on his past self where the neck and collarbone of an ordinary human would meet. His past self punched at the side of the machete while Okazaki reared up to kick his past self in the chest. Both hits landed at almost the same time. But Okazaki's past self was somewhat slower and less agile than Okazaki's more advanced model, and the kick ripped the machete backward, the tip catching slightly on frontal armor plate and causing it to crack where Okazaki kicked. The machete itself shattered under his past self's blow, but it had served Okazaki's purpose.

 

 

 

(Really, quite a lot of it.)

 

It was a frentic fight. Even with reaction boosting chemicals and computer aided movement control, there was no time for either of them to think. "He who hesitates is lost" applied more than ever, as even the slightest hesitation would result in damage that would gradually tip the odds in favor of the one that didn't hesistate.

 

 

(So on and so forth.)

 

Okazaki and his past self still felt pain, even though it was within their power to nullify the sensation. Each form they chose felt pain in different ways, to varying degrees, but the end result was that injuries still hurt. This was useful; those with congenital insensitivity to pain would recognize how having a sensation warning them that they had been injured would be handy. That said, it was still a nuisance to some degree as well. Though he had tortured most of his ability to be affected by pain, it was still annoying and unpleasant to Okazaki to lose a limb to his past self, much as it was annoying and unpleasant to his past self to be electrocuted when Okazaki rammed the stump and its still live wires into his past self's face.

 

 

 

(Moving on from that, I had actually had plans for expanding the whole battle between Past and Okazaki, more than I actually ended up doing. Had a lot of disjointed ideas, but not a whole lot to connect them. Like....)

 

He'd remembered what he'd thought when he'd first seen it. First, of course, was "Oh shit." Second was "It's a timber wolf!" Third was "I want one!" Fourth was "Heh. Obviously someone's a battletech fan."

 

 

 

(Another thing is that I had sort of aimed to possibly avoid the paradox bit in general. Didn’t end up working out in my head, though. Still, had this preliminary bit for that.)

 

"I brought you back to stop you, not to start another war," the girl noted with a glare. The expression seemed out of place on her face. "You killed my father. And countless others. And for what?"

 

[TO ATTEMPT WORLD PEACE. TO RAISE THE STANDARD OF LIVING.]

 

"You did none of those things."

 

[THE ROAD TO HELL IS PAVED WITH GOOD INTENTIONS.]

 

"And if you keep this up you are truly damned."

 

[I CANNOT STOP. THE RISK OF PARADOX - NOW FAR GREATER.]

 

"There is no risk of a paradox."

 

[YOU HAVE SAID AS MUCH. BUT YOU HAVE NOT PROVEN IT.]

 

A pause.

 

[IT IS TOO RISKY. TOO RISKY BY FAR. REALITY COULD-]

 

Another pause.

 

[-BREAK DOWN, FOR ALL I KNOW.]

 

"You ask for proof. Ask Kotomi. She has seen enough. She would know."

 

There was a long pause.

 

[I WILL ASK.]

 

"Good. I offer you this one warning, before you go."

 

[YES?]

 

"If you do not heed my words, if you do not change your path...," The girl regarded him sternly, but pityingly. Okazaki found it distinctly unsettling. "The world will turn to hell." He paused.

 

[I KNOW.]

 

"No, I don't think you do," she observed sadly. "You have seen what lies ahead. From one side. I have seen all of what follows." Okazaki didn't respond to that for some time.

 

[THEN I HOPE KOTOMI CAN VERIFY YOUR CLAIM.]

 

Okazaki began rousing from his sleep. Less than a minute had passed since he had left. He had much to think about. And much to ask Kotomi.

 

 

 

(And, of course, some preliminary bits for the end-game ‘everyone dies’ scenario.)

 

Furukawa realizes what sort of person she has been friends with all year and slips into a death state. Okazaki attempts to resurrect her but without a will to live she still dies. Akio and Sanae both blame him, Akio dying as he attacks, Okazaki putting Sanae out of her misery after essentially forcing her to watch her daughter and husband die.

 

"No... Not again..."

 

Tomoyo attacks Okazaki. Okazaki keeps trying to make her quit, before finally resorting to yelling in her face, forgetting for a brief instant that his voice box doubles as a sonic cannon. Death is instant and messy, and happens to also kill her brother in the process.

 

Alternatively, Tomoyo gets crushed in some debris when the nuke hits. When dealing with nukes, one really should always dig deeper.

 

"Oh gods, it's happening again..."

 

Ryou falls into a waking coma for reasons similar to Furukawa's. Kyou is devastated. [BELAY THIS, I KILL HER EARLIER]

 

Kotomi goes rather monotone past this point from the devastation. Doesn't come right out and say anything though.

 

Radiation kills everyone there thanks to leaks incurred; the damage was more widespread than expected. Everyone gets a nice fatal touch of radiation. Okazaki is only able to save Kotomi by performing the brain uploading procedure on her. It wasn't exact; resulting in a Kotomi that's... Got just enough sociopathy to survive the death of her friends and enough of a taste for vengeance to kill Okazaki, but not enough sociopathy to survive doing it. Oh hey, that's a good way to get everyone killified, ain't it? I'm... Kinda sad I thought of it actually, but there it is. Oh, she explains this when she goes and uploads the mind virus into Okazaki.

 

 

 

(Cheery! Also of note is that I had, at one point, plans for a sequel to this story; a bit of a crossover. Decided it’d be a bad idea, but I’d already written some preliminary bits....)

 

"There is one thing that bothers me."

 

"And that is?"

 

"I know you've been interfering with events, you said as much yourself."

 

"Yes."

 

"So I have to wonder... Fujibayashi... It's exceedingly unlikely that shards of glass could line up like that."

 

"And what are you implying?"

 

"Did you kill Fujibayashi?"

 

"You killed Fujibayashi. It was your actions that caused that fight, your very own finger was on the trigger of the weapon. If I made circumstances easier for her to die... Well, turnabout is fair play as you like to say. After what you did to me and my family, it seems only fair that you and your... Well, friends, should pay the price."

 

"You destroyed Kyou with that stunt. Furukawa went into a coma. Kotomi..."

 

"And if you hadn't have decided to fight, none of that would have happened."

 

"I don't think I can forgive you for that."

 

"I don't think I can forgive you for what you did either."

 

"I never killed innocent people intentionally, Ushio."

 

"If it's any consolation, their deaths aren't exactly going to keep."

 

"...What is that supposed to mean?"

 

"I could, in fact, will send you back. To before that turn of events."

 

"...Why?"

 

"Because I want you to change history. Change yourself. I've seen how things can be. You have the capacity within you for great good, as much as you have the capacity within you for great evil. You have seen what evil gets you. This time, I want you to act in accordance with great good."

 

"...And if this causes a paradox?"

 

"It won't cause a paradox."

 

"So you've said before."

 

"It won't. As added insurance in either event, that's not the only thing I plan to do."

 

"...And what else do you plan to do?"

 

"There would be a species of alien out there that would probably seem rather familiar to you that would have arrived a good ten years after you ruined the biosphere. Rather slow to progress technologically, with military capabilities that are somewhat lackluster in spite of their imperialistic tendencies thanks to their culture not feeling a need to advance military technology too much. You see, they came rather expecting to find humans to be fielding knights on horseback at the most still, as all alien races they had found followed the same patterns of technological advancement."

 

"It sounds like you're describing the Race from Harry Turtledove's WorldWar series."

 

"They are very close, in a lot of ways. As it turns out, they ended up sending a fleet of ships against earth as well. I will be ensuring that they send the mission early. A less than subtle method of ensuring compliance, but I suspect you would try to think a way around subtler methods. Plus, having an alien empire to fight will hopefully prevent you from having any ideas about moving against the nations of earth again."

 

 

 

(Relatedly....)

 

To say that Okazaki's feelings on the matter were mixed would be an understatement. It would mean war. A war that would never really end. And it was even ethically a good idea. For Okazaki, it was his heaven, his eden, his Valhalla; and he'd only needed to die twice for it. On the other hand, everything he had done, every crime he had committed... Okazaki knew he didn't deserve good fortune like this.

 

Still, as the old saying goes, 'don't look a gift horse in the mouth.' For once, Okazaki would be facing the world with genuine hope for the future. Perhaps in the end, that was all that was needed.

 

 

 

(Also, this rather ‘meta’ snippet.)

 

Okazaki looked at her with a raised, incredulous eyebrow. "You mean to say you dragged a whole new planet from a fictional reality to this reality?"

 

"In a manner of speaking," Ushio replied.

 

He opened his mouth to speak before closing it again as the implications began to catch up with him. It was only at length that he found he could speak again. "That raises some... disturbing implications about this reality."

 

 

 

(Speaking of ‘meta’ snippets....)

 

Ushio's sight had been far indeed. She could see through multiple universes in that spur, a gift she had in part acquired from being dead. She had help though, from an outside universe. She couldn't see where this help had come from, and by extention, neither could Okazaki.

 

There was one other important limit to her sight, and that had been her own realm, where they were trapped. It was in many ways like trying to see your own eyes. You will never see them, in the truest sense. The best one can do is gaze into a mirror, and see a ghost of oneself.

 

It was what made this fight so potentially dangerous. There was no way to know what would happen here.

 

 

 

 

(Also had some chunks involving what happened after he went into the past in the future. This one’s probably the best of the bunch.)

 

Something was wrong.

 

Okazaki couldn't place it. He still had all the fragments he should have, and yet he was feeling as though something was missing. Or perhaps not so much missing as-

 

'That's curious,' he reflected.

 

'Indeed it is,' came the voice of Ushio.

 

'This merger is not as complete as expected, is it?'

 

'No,' she admitted. 'And... something's... I can't explain this, but I...' She sniffed slightly. 'I did that? I didn't...'

 

There was sudden mocking laughter from a dark corner of his mind, from an impossibly deep voice. Okazaki blinked mentally; he wasn't sure, but beyond the overt mockery the voice exuded, he was sure there was more subtle undercurrents of derision. In fact, he was pretty sure it was mocking his tendency to internally monologue in a sort of Vin Diesel-y voice. 'You didn't,' said the voice as its laugh subsided.

 

'Great. Now I'm genuinely losing my last marble.'

 

'Whether you had any marbles to start with is a matter of some debate,' noted the new voice. 'Please, allow me to introduce myself. I'm a man of weath and-'

 

'Yeah, yeah, get on with it,' Okazaki noted bitterly.

 

'Did you make me do...,' Ushio began uncertainly.

 

'Hmph,' noted the new voice. 'No sense of propriety. Very well. I didn't exactly make you do those things Ushio. But I sure put those thoughts in your head, slowly, surely began making you take actions you would not have otherwise. It took a very long time- Ah, but time is immaterial to ones such as us, isn't it?'

 

'So you're the one that killed them,' she noted, the bitterness in her voice undercut by tiredness. 'Through my own hands.... I know who you are.'

 

'Well, would someone deign enlighten me?' Okazaki questioned irritably.

 

'Heh. I figured you were smarter than that,' said the voice. 'After all, we were always pretty clever...'

 

'I may have kept that memory from him. A few memories, even. Even? Even.... Even I don't want him to have it all. Too much. Too much...'

 

'So the merger wasn't a success on that level either,' mused the voice. 'Very well. Allow me to enlighten. I am you, Okazaki. Or rather... a you that never became Okazaki. A you that never faced a "Mystery to the East." I am what we would have become if we had just taken our own course. Please. Call us Other.'

 

'And you made me do all of those....' Ushio's voice broke down into tears.

 

Other sighed. 'It was necessary. For a number of reasons. Mostly, it was for his own good.'

 

'My. Own. Good.' Okazaki wanted to sink his teeth into the voice. 'MY OWN GOOD. What the flipping, flying fuck are you talking about?!'

 

'It's the only way you seem to learn,' Other said with the mental equivalent of a smirk, 'seeing as you won't just accept what other people are trying to tell you. Have to make your own mistakes, I guess.'

 

'My own mistakes?! Didn't it occur to you that..." Okazaki paused as he considered where that line of thought was going.

 

'That if I had left well enough alone, things would have been alright? That the great mass of humanity you extinguished would have been worth the price?' Other gave an amused snort. 'Is that what you were going to say?'

 

Okazaki snorted in return. 'Yeah, well, that second half caught up to me and stopped it.'

 

'Good, maybe we'll be able to beat some common sense into you yet.'

 

'Yeah, fuck you.'

 

'I'm not too happy with this situation either. I counted to a googol because of you. You.... You....'

 

'Shut up,' Other stated.

 

'Make me! Make me...'

 

'I would,' Other replied calmly. 'But there's still other matters to attend to. We may be our own worst enemy, but there is still the matter of setting things straight. It will take our might combined to defeat him.'

 

Okazaki chuckled. 'Even so, the urge to rend you limb from limb is so very high right now. But it's not worth it. You're not worth it.'

 

'No,' agreed Other, his voice going strangely quiet. 'No it's not, and no I'm not.'

 

'I'm sensing regret.'

 

'I came to know them as well as Ushio did,' Other admitted. 'As well as you knew them. It wasn't easy-'

 

'But you were still able to do it.'

 

'Yes. I saw things from all angles. It is as I as Ushio said. It prevented a greater paradox.'

 

'I should hate you,' Ushio noted tiredly. 'I should. But...'

 

'Save your hatred,' Other said. 'We can stop this whole thing. Nip it right in the bud. Stop this from happening to another universe.'

 

'Yeah,' Ushio said after a long moment. 'You're right.'

 

'She may be in a forgiving mood, but I still quite hate you,' Okazaki noted. 'In fact, I think I can do it for two.'

 

'What about three? Three... Fo- Gah!'

 

'Problem?'

 

'Many.'

 

'You can hate me for as many as you like,' Other said. 'As long as you fight your Past and not me, it really doesn't matter.'

 

'You make it hard not to want to fight you,' Okazaki noted.

 

'I've noticed we have that effect on ourself,' Other replied with amusement. 'In fact, our very first true fight, when we became distributed, was to rip and tear at our very flesh. It says a lot about us, I think, that we chose that as our distraction. There were other options, you know.'

 

'None so effective....' Okazaki sighed. 'But I see you point. Either way.'

 

'Yes,' Other agreed. 'Either way-'

 

'Either way, I don't want to hear from you,' Okazaki said. 'Any of you, I think. Too much hatred or bad memories.'

 

Other began to laugh.

 

'That's fine,' Ushio agreed quietly. 'I need.... I need to do some thinking.'

 

'You can have your quiet, at least from me,' Other said. 'From yourself, however.... That, I cannot control.'

 

 

 

(This bit? Also interesting, and hints at the slightly sadder ending I had initially planned.)

 

As he held her, he frowned. How could he tell her? He wasn't the Okazaki she had known. That Okazaki had merged with him, after a fashion. They were not the same person anymore. She loved a lie.

 

And he had experienced too much. Before, perhaps a common ground might have been reached. Maybe it could have worked. Now? Now he knew he was deluding himself. He looked down at her in his arms. So frail. He could perhaps fix that. Determined to stay by his side, even after he had done all he had. Even if it was to be sure she could kill him before she succumbed to grief, he had to respect that.

 

'But I'm not the same. I wasn't the same after Ryou died. Maybe I could have went on after that regardless. Even after everyone else died, maybe I could. But then she died. And I died. Everyone died. And I... in a way I truly died too. Not the same anymore.'

 

As he thought, he held her closer, tighter.

 

"...Ow," she moaned softly.

 

He loosed his grip immediately. "Ah...," he said softly. "I... forgot myself for a moment." 'And remembered myself not a moment too soon. So very frail. I could easily kill her with an empassioned hug. Even if I could fix that.... I lost something, when I was gone. I'm no longer in as much control of myself as I was, am I? Sooner or later...'

 

'Sooner or later, you think you may genuinely hurt her?'

 

'That's about the size of it, yes. Even with the stabilizing influence our merger has had.... I'm not sure it will be enough.'

 

'You promised me,' came a new voice. 'You promised to take care of her.'

 

'...Maybe I still can.'

 

'What do you mean?'

 

'Nothing,' he thought, and encased his thoughts in a mental safe before eating the key. 'It's nothing.' He couldn't return to be the man that she had loved. Far too many eons had slowly worked him unhinged, something he knew he could never fix in himself. Maybe though... Maybe, maybe it didn't matter.

 

 

 

(As does this.)

 

"...I'm sorry, I didn't... I didn't get it finished."

 

Oogami blinked and raised a suspicious eyebrow at Okazaki.

 

Okazaki sighed and checked for something with his mental internet. "The projector... It costs *find a number of yen worth presently around $1500, adjust upwards 60% to account for inflation*, right?"

 

"That's right," Oogami admitted after a moment.

 

"Well. In that event." Okazaki stood and went to his desk, watching Oogami through his rear camera, who in turn was watching him. He pulled a number of counterfeit bills from the desk, then walked to stand in front of Oogami. "This should cover the projector. And... a little extra." A bitter smirk worked its way onto his face. "Get something nice for yourself." He held out the money with one hand.

 

Oogami regarded the money warily for a moment, before taking it into his hands gingerly, as though he were being handed a venomous snake. "...Okazaki." He frowned. "Are you going to do something rash?"

 

Okazaki mirrored Oogami's frown. "No. It's just.... Nevermind."

 

"Look, I can't just-"

 

"Oogami san." Okazaki rubbed his eyes for a moment, before summoning his memories of his count. He pegged Oogami with the stare of one who that had outlasted the heat death of the universe. Oogami took a step backward. "I have had a very, very long night. I'm sorry I didn't get it done. I'm trying to make amends for that in the only way quickly possible."

 

Okazaki sighed. "I'm not going to go killing myself or anything like that, okay? I just..." He took a step back and sat down gently. "Look. I'll be okay, I think. In a few days."

 

 

 

(A first draft of the final fight. A surprising amount made it into the final draft!)

 

Okazaki blinked. "Ushio?!" 'This isn't according to her plan! What if-'

 

Past raised an eyebrow.

 

"Okazaki," she said, as she walked toward Past. "You, or at least someone very much like you... did a great deal of things to a great many people, almost all of them unforgiveable. You may not have done as much as he, but you would have." She stopped a few feet in front of Past, whom looked down at her with a sneer. "I shouldn't forgive you. I really shouldn't. Or at least..." She turned her head to look at Okazaki with a sad smile. "That's what the Other would say."

 

Okazaki raised an eyebrow. "The Other?"

 

"Look," Past interrupted, "can we hurry this up? Things to see, people to kill..."

 

"Time is meaningless here," Ushio stated as she turned toward Past. "This needs to be said."

 

Past snorted and crossed his arms. "Whatever. Let me know when you're done."

 

"Thank you," Ushio said, and turned back to Okazaki. "Yes, the Other. The part of me that was you."

 

"Ah."

 

"Yes. When you and I... merged," she wrinkled her nose, "the part that was him became separate. Without his influence on my actions, I was able to do some thinking of my own, for the first time in a very long while."

 

Okazaki scratched his chin. "I see. I think."

 

"It should have all been unforgiveable. And yet.... And yet, having seen into your head, I understand why you did what you did. I can't really hate you, knowing your motivations. I'm not saying it makes it right, but I do understand. And unlike you, I still remember how to do something that is an essential part of being a human being."

 

"I feel I should be insulted," Okazaki noted.

 

"Okazaki kun," Ushio said, which prompted him to raise both eyebrows. "I forgive you. I forgive you for everything that you have done."

 

"You... you what?" Okazaki let his head fall to the side in shock.

 

"Just exercising my humanity, now that I've gotten it back." She turned to Past. "And you. I forgive you, too."

 

"That's... wonderful," Past said with a raised, suspicious eyebrow.

 

"Yes," she said as she took a step forward, prompting Past to raise his fists defensively and take a step backward, "yes it is." She held her arms out in front of her unthreateningly as she continued to walk forward.

 

Past regarded her warily as she wrapped her arms around him in a gentle hug.

 

"...Father... ...Mother... ...Ishikawa...," Ushio whispered, only the strange nature of the realm allowing Okazaki to hear her as she talked of her parents and husband. "Forgive me for my forgiveness... but it's necessary."

 

Past blinked as Ushio's hold became tighter.

 

"I'm coming home," Ushio sobbed as she began to shine, a brilliant, unearthly light obscuring Past's attempts to push her off.

 

A sudden flash, a burst of sound. Okazaki momentarily couldn't see. When his sight readjusted, he noted that only Past remained.

 

Past was clutching at where Ushio had hugged him, a pained grimmace on his face. He fell onto his knees, then flopped down to let his forehead smack the ground with a groan.

 

Okazaki could see whisps of emotion trailing off of Past, the result of grievous wounds to his very soul. He could imagine what it must be like. Okazaki, as Past, had never really expected to be forgiven. He had hoped that he would, through his actions, make the world an overall better place, but he still hadn't expected forgiveness. After all, it wasn't something he had ever been able to properly do himself.

 

And then, someone who he or someone very much like himself had raped the mind of, had forgiven him. And then, without a hint of true malice so far as Okazaki could detect, she had ceased her existence just to see that he was stopped. An unavoidable, painful truth, that all attempts Past made to wrap his mind around just caused threads of his reasoning, and thus his entire moral underpinning, to unravel in threads of pure soulstuff.

 

Sometimes forgiving was the worst thing you can do to a person, it seemed.

 

He couldn't help but let out a small chuckle. "Ushio.... Heh." He shook his head. "Forgiveness, huh? Well. Under the circumstances... I guess I forgive you, too." He blinked, and then smirked as he noted a presence behind him. "You, on the other hand.... Not so much."

 

Other was ancient. Mental scars traced their way over his incorporeal body, jagged unhealed gashes that crossed each other like a billion lethal encounters. He was surrounded by a cloud of barely contained fury, which occasionally snapped down like a rabid beast and reopened a wound that had been trying to close. It seemed as though only a core of stubbornness even held his form together, which Okazaki supposed was probably exactly right.

 

Other smirked as he walked past Okazaki. "I really did it for your own good, you know."

 

"Yeah, fuck you." Okazaki raised his middle finger at Other. "I still don't forgive you."

 

"That's fine. It doesn't matter." Other reared a fist back. He paused his action and turned his head to look back at Okazaki. "...She's a nice girl, isn't she?"

 

"...Yeah," Okazaki admitted. "Yeah, she really is."

 

Past began to push himself upward as he slowly came to terms with being forgiven, shuddering as he did so.

 

"Huh," Other said as his fist began to glow. "Never thought I'd see the day." He shook his head. "Can't say we deserve it. Heh. Don't screw up, alright?"

 

Okazaki snorted. "Considering our track record, sound advice."

 

"Indeed," Other said, and sent his fist flying into the newly risen Past's face.

 

Another flash, another bang. Not as brilliant as Ushio's, but a fair effort all the same.

 

Past was left flat on his back. Emotions seeped from his face as he groaned, half in fury and half in pain. The raging beast of hatred that had torn at Other now swarmed Past like raging ants, pulling and tearing at his weaknesses. It was the truth of hatred; hatred of himself, hatred of his deeds.

 

But hatred was something Past was used to. Ultimately it could only fuel him. Still, it would only make him weaker, over the short term.

 

"..Goodbye, me." Okazaki said as he gave a tired salute, before blinking and grunting. He looked down at his stomach, which was beginning to bleed emotions into the aether. He put his hands against the wound, only to feel something trying to press outward. "Nngha!" A spike pushed his hand out of the way, before forming itself into a familiar seeming head.

 

In a lot of ways, souls could be likened to a computer program. You feed them information in the form of stimulus, bodily or metaphysical, and you got a response of some sort. Under certain circumstances, parts of a soul can be copied, or replaced with another, similar piece of code. Similarly, sometimes this can be reverted, if the situation is right. This was one way to look at what was happening to Okazaki.

 

Another way to look at it was as like a starfish, in that cutting away an arm will both generate an entirely new individual from the severed arm and not kill the original, but it will still be rather painful for the aflicted individual. This happened to be the way that Okazaki was viewing the present circumstance.

 

"Gah, stop trying to hold me in, it'll be easier this way," said the Okazaki that had counted to a googol, as he pulled his arm out from Okazaki's stomach. "Just think of it as if you're giving birth! Oh, hello, call me Future!"

 

Okazaki fell onto his back with a pained moan. "Oh fuck you too. Couldn't you have just, I don't know, manifested? Like they did?"

 

"Don't have the power," Future said with a deranged grin. "Something about counting to a googol, merging with UshiOther, then merging with you.... Well, it just sucked a lot of my power right out!"

 

"And that has to do with what, exactly?" Okazaki held his middle together with his hands and waited for his emotions to pull themselves together.

 

"Well, to put it simply," Future replied, "I couldn't just manifest. I had to borrow some spare thoughts. Nothing you'd miss. Just some specific strong memories, a lot of other not particularly strong ones...."

 

Okazaki regarded him with a suspicious glare. "Which memories are we talking about here, exactly?"

 

"Let's just say they belonged to me in the first place," Future said. "A parting gift, from me to you."

 

Okazaki blinked, and tried to reflect on his memories. Specifically, what had come through with Past. He blinked. Many of them were gone. He used to be able to remember Kotomi dying. It was a blur now. Same with what had happened to the Fujibayashi sisters. And most of the whole of the time he had spent.... That Future had spent trying to contemplate infinity in Ushio's realm was simply gone.

 

Sanity in a nice, gift wrapped package.

 

"Huh, now I know what being birthed feels like," Future said as he rubbed his chin. "Like? Like..."

 

"I suppose I really should thank you," Okazaki noted as the emotions began to pull themselves together.

 

"Yeah, well.... It wasn't for you," Future said. "I rather hate you really. But dear Kotomi.... I would say 'treat her well', but you and I are the same, so I know you will."

 

"Still, I'll do my best," Okazaki replied as he stood uncertainly. "So, are you gonna go out with a flashbang too?"

 

"Oh, heavens no," Future said. "I'm not strong enough to even make a firecracker's worth of effort. Happens when you get whittled down to a few hundred drones, then have your mind flayed, then go count to a googol.... G-"

 

"So what are you going to do, then?" Okazaki frowned at Future.

 

"Sheesh, so impatient, even when I went all this way to make sure you kept the useful memories," Future said as his arms began to form into what looked to Okazaki like octopus tentacles. Where the suckers on an octopus tentacle would be though, there were instead sharp barbs which dripped a vial looking black substance into the aether. "Those memories I kept, though... they have to go somewhere."

 

"That's... cruel."

 

"It's fitting."

 

"Perhaps."

 

"Well, I'm off," Future said, the deranged grin on his face widening. Suddenly he leapt toward Past, before falling into an ungainly cross between skipping, running, and hopping. With a final flurry of motion, he dived toward the slowly standing Past, and latched on.

 

As Okazaki watched, Past fell to the ground and began to writhe as Future merged with him, in as invasive a way as possible.

 

 

 

(Now, onto some old chapters I just ended up tossing. This is the first draft of the final chapter. Some of it made it into the actual release, but not much.)

 

Okazaki reflected on his life, after he had defeated his past. His return had been almost anti-climactic, really; he'd simply found himself back in his bodies, including the bodies his past self had at one time occupied. He'd taken the opportunity to gleefully drop in on his friends from the past, nearly reduced to tears by seeing them.

 

He'd also enjoyed his homecoming in Hikarizaka. Although he'd ended up fully expelled after playing the bagpipes in the middle of school grounds, the fact that he'd made it back at all more than made up for that. He celebrated by asking Kotomi out on a proper date after classes let out.

 

The next few days had been an adventure of their own. Challenging Akio to a game of baseball as an odd sort of apology. The dinner and dissection date with Kotomi. Silently replacing the government of North Korea as his single concession to his old ways.

 

The next few weeks had been a bit quieter. More dates with Kotomi. Starting a few companies to sell high-quality merchandise at exceedingly low prices. Initiating a big environmental cleanup project, in secret.

 

That all had been more than a few years ago. As he looked at Kyou as she sat on the bench, he couldn't help but think of the girl who used to try to hit him at every possible opportunity. Judging from the expression on her face, he had an inkling she might try to do so again.

 

'Well, if that's what she wants to do, I don't much care,' he thought as a part of him sat down next to her. "Hey."

 

Kyou glanced at him with a frown before leaning back in her seat. "Hey. Long time no see."

 

"I wouldn't quite say that," Okazaki replied. "I've kept tabs."

 

She quirked an eye at him. "Nothing creepy about that, nothing at all."

 

He chuckled. "I try to keep tabs on a lot of people." He frowned and stroked his chin. "I try not to look too close, though. People do like their privacy, after all."

 

"That's good," she replied. "I imagine Kotomi would be less than pleased about it if you were looking too closely."

 

He raised an eyebrow, amused. "And what exactly is it that you're implying?"

 

Kyou rolled her eyes. "Nothing at all. Just trying to get under your skin a little. You do have skin to get under, don't you?"

 

"Kevlar enmeshed with a backing of carbon nanotubules and silksteel, but yes," Okazaki said as he crossed his legs. "Speaking of, still refusing an upgrade?"

 

She wrinkled her nose. "It's unnatural. Those who've gotten your stuff... are they even human anymore?"

 

"Yes... and no." He shrugged. "Something a little beyond, really. They still feel, love, have aspirations, the whole nine yards. They even still bleed, if not nearly as easily."

 

She sighed. "So you've said."

 

He frowned. "So. What's eating you?"

 

Kyou glared at him from the corner of her eyes without turning her head. "I'm out of a job, thanks to you."

 

Okazaki sucked in some air between his teeth. "I... had heard, yes."

 

"Because you keep tabs."

 

"Well, yes."

 

She sighed. "I'm not the only one, of course. A lot of teachers are out of the job."

 

"The same goes for a lot of things, not just education," he observed. "The transition isn't all fun and games, after all. Although," he chuckled, "there are a lot of those around, anymore. If anything, game creation and artistry have become in high demand."

 

"Because a lot of people now have no jobs," Kyou spat.

 

Okazaki regarded her for a moment. "That's indisputable. People now have a lot of free time they did not have before. The transition's bumpy, as I've said, but there are a lot of people out there discovering themselves now. In time, things will settle down, and everyone will be happier for it. Quality of life is already soaring for most."

 

"But without any purpose, what's the point?" She shook her head. "Nevermind that. What makes you think taking over the education field is a good idea?"

 

"You've been doing some digging," he said with a grin.

 

"It's not like you did much of a job hiding it," she said. "It was pretty much there to find for anyone to find."

 

"What's the point of hiding my little plans anymore?" He shrugged. "I've already set out what I aimed to do."

 

Kyou turned to look directly at him. "How much is the Dollar worth now, again? The Euro? The Yen? The Pound? The Rupee? The-"

 

"About the same," Okazaki said with a shrug. "That system had its place, but it's now obsolete. Has been for a long time now, but it took a long time for that to be realized."

 

"There are a lot of people who would dispute that," She replied as she turned back to her original position.

 

"True enough," he admitted. "Are you one?"

 

"If things are going to be like this, then yes," she said. "Did you know that you've managed to drive more than a few people to suicide?" She turned back to him, furious. "They _killed themselves_ because they lost their jobs and couldn't find new ones!"

 

He sat back heavily in the bench. "I... am aware, yes."

 

She snarled at him. "And you think this is a good thing?!"

 

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "I think it's an inevitable thing. All I have done is sped up the inevitable."

 

Kyou smacked him, and then massaged her hand.

 

Okazaki looked down. "For what it's worth.... I _am_ sorry. I tried, try, will try to save those who are in such straits.... They deserve to be happy, and I've not helped them out in that regard in the least. I try, though, and-"

 

"Do you think that will bring them back?" She narrowed her eyes.

 

He pinched the bridge of his nose. "No."

 

"Then. Why." She clenched the back of the bench hard enough to make her knuckles white. "Why did you do it? Why are you doing it?"

 

He raised an eyebrow. "I have never been anything less than honest about-"

 

"You can stop right there," she spat out. "You sure weren't honest with us about-"

 

"Wasn't I?" He raised an eyebrow. "I'll admit I didn't share all the details with you, but when asked I never lied. I may have played it off as a joke, but I still was entirely truthful."

 

"You're lying now," she said. "How can you be entirely truthful if you withhold details?"

 

He blinked. "...That's a fair point." He stroked his chin. "Regardless, I have been honest about my reasons. I really do want to increase overall quality of life, for every single person on this planet. The problem is, it's an impossible goal right now. Too many people still feel good when they trample on others, and they're no longer really able to do so. Too many people also can't see how this will eventually benefit them, and are miserable because of it."

 

"Bull. Shit." Kyou smacked her hand on the back of the bench. "How can you even pretend to say that it'll eventually benefit them? All you've done is throw them out of their comfortable lives without a way back in!"

 

Okazaki sighed. "I can't outright _prove_ it, of course. Worse, the only way that I can prove it is to let the results speak for themselves."

 

She sneered. "So I'm supposed to just wait around and see this paradise of yours sprout out of the ground?"

 

"On the contrary," he replied. "That's actually why I'm here. Kyou. I need advisors."

 

"I... what?" She blinked.

 

"I need advisors," he repeated. "As much information as I've accumulated, as many viewpoints as I've seen.... I still think I would do better, if I had independent perspectives." He put his hands over his ears. "Help me Fujibayashi. You're my only hope."

 

She glared at him. "You had me up until your impression there."

 

He chuckled. "Sorry, I felt the need to lighten the mood." He straightened up and looked her in the eyes. "In all serious though. Will you help me out? Give me advice in my matters? Particularly with regards to education?"

 

"Will you stop this charade?" Kyou crossed her arms. "Will you bring things back to how they used to be? Will you stop making lives miserable?"

 

Okazaki sagged slightly. "Even if I could at this stage, I'm not sure that I would."

 

"Then why should I advise you?" She raised an eyebrow. "Clearly, you're not listening to it."

 

"Things have progressed too far to go back," he said with a shrug. "And I couldn't, in good conscience, enforce the status quo. Things _had_ to change. Before it was impossible to pull back from the brink. Here's what you don't seem to understand; we, all of us, all of humanity... were on the very edge of causing our own demise. Do you realize how fucked up the environment was? Still is? All because of the way we were doing things, without really looking ahead to the future."

 

"And that makes it okay to drive people to suicide?" She stood up, fists balled. "Just have to break a few eggs to make an omelet, right? Just an unfortunate bump on the road of progress?"

 

He stood up as well, and crossed his arms behind him. "I will ensure the survival of the human race and the biosphere. I will also do my best to make sure people are happy. No, my second best. My best would be to literally make them happy, and I'm not prepared to go and do that sort of shit again." He looked to the side. "I don't want to cause anyone to be miserable; quite the opposite. But I know also that it is unavoidable, at least in the short term. That's why I'm calling on you, in the hopes of making the transition less... burdensome."

 

Kyou slowly clenched and unclenched her fists before she stuck them in her pockets. "That brings me back to the fact that you're not going to listen to my advice."

 

"Not if it's impossible to follow, no," Okazaki admitted.

 

She stared at him. "And where do you draw that line, exactly? What is impossible and what is not?"

 

He regarded her for a moment. "Okay, that's a fair point. Alright, if you can prove to me beyond a shadow of a doubt that the way I'm going is wrong, then I will acquiesce, and attempt to return things to how they were before. Use whatever resources you need, do it however you will. Make a presentation, write a paper, I don't know. Just make it good."

 

"Fine, I will," she said.

 

"Good," he replied.

 

She nodded. "Good."

 

"Good," he repeated, more for the sake of the trope than anything else.

 

She raised an eyebrow at him, and then sighed. "So. How's Kotomi doing?"

 

"Pretty well actually," he said. "She thought it'd be fun to visit Io, so we're visiting Io."

 

"Io?" Kyou blinked. "...The moon of Jupiter?"

 

"One and the same," Okazaki replied. "It's been interesting. We've taken a lot of lava samples in our attempt to understand how the moon has developed in comparison to the other jovian satellites, and-"

 

"This sounds less like a vacation and more like field research," she observed.

 

"Depending on your point of view, the two are one and the same," he noted. "Speaking of, there's another... industry that's pretty much booming. The sciences have never been healthier."

 

She sighed. "Just stop. You're not going to convince me that it's a good thing."

 

"Perhaps not," he said. "I'm hoping you'll convince yourself."

 

She shook her head. "In your dreams."

 

"Heh, if I had them." He frowned. "I kind of miss sleep. Always too much to do, though...."

 

"My heart bleeds for you, it really does," Kyou replied.

 

Okazaki chuckled a little. "So what of you, then? I hear you've been seeing a former janitor?"

 

She opened her eyes wide in surprise with a blush. "W-where did you hear that?"

 

"Oh, a friend of a friend of a friend," he said. "...Furukawa."

 

"Damn, she just can't keep things to herself," she muttered.

 

"Still can't believe she ended up dating Sunohara," he observed. "Now there's a pair I wouldn't have expected. Maybe him and Tomoyo, maybe her and that one boy that always hangs out around the breadshop, but the two of them together?" He shook his head and chuckled. "Hope it goes well for 'em."

 

Kyou leaned back in the bench. "Speaking of Tomoyo, is she still running the circuit in America?"

 

"She passed on to the European Union actually," Okazaki said.

 

"She's got a lot of followers," she noted.

 

"Yeah," he replied sadly. "Are you one?"

 

"Yes," she admitted.

 

"I figured as much," he said. "You two share the same sorts of arguments. I wish she'd advise me as well, but...." He shrugged.

 

"But she hates your guts," she finished for him.

 

"...That's about the size of it," he admitted.

 

"Her brother's apparently dating Fukou," she said.

 

"So I heard," he replied. "I may or may not have introduced them."

 

Kyou smirked. "Playing matchmaker on top of everything else?"

 

Okazaki raised an eyebrow. "So how's Ryou and her runner beau doing, again?"

 

"Touche," she replied.

 

He chuckled and pulled out a can from his shirt. "Want some canned coffee?"

 

"Pass," she replied. "In fact, I should probably be heading home."

 

"Heh, alright." He took a sip. "Say hi to Botan for me, eh?"

 

Kyou twitched slightly as she stood. "Sure, I'll do that." She nodded to him and began to walk away.

 

Okazaki regarded her for a moment before looking out at the pathway. 'Huh. This is actually around where things started, isn't it? Things began to change, here. And now, it feels like things are ending here. Or perhaps beginning again.' He chuckled to himself and stood. 'Well, I suppose that's just how life is. There may be an end to all things, but to all things there is also a beginning. Hopefully the next iteration of things will be brighter than the past.'

 

 

 

(Now, for what I’ve saved for the last, here; the initial draft for Act 4. Yes, the whole thing, more or less. I’d gotten the whole thing almost completed before I decided to change one critical little thing right at the start that changed the whole tone of the act and required substantial revisions. Le sigh. Still, the new version is better, I think! Even if there were some interesting bits in the draft....)

 

Chapter 17: Heat Death of the Universe

 

Act Four: An End To All Things

 

That which was once Okazaki regarded the girl that stood before him with confused curiosity. 'I... Recognize her. Who... Ushio, wasn't it? Yes. That's her name. Ushio. Damn, I can't seem to remember anything else... No, no, something else... Yes.'

 

He remembered what her presence meant. He was dead. Again. For the second time in a long existance he was dead again. How long an existance? It seemed to span back forever, but the details were muddled; a whirling maelstrom of images, disjointed from one another. The occasional whisper of a half formed memory resounded in his mind. How had had that happened, he wondered? He tried to focus his thoughts.

 

'Better question. How do I know that means I'm dead?' Memories started reforming as he contemplated the issue. 'Ah yes. Because I promised I would not return. Why did I do that? Because... She messed with my mind? Yes, but.... No, there's more, happened after.... I hate her, I think. Why? Because...'

 

He regarded the waifish figure before him, both of them inside her infernal cabin once more.

 

'...That's right. She killed Fujibayashi. And Tamafuki. Who... Yes. Kyou's sister and Tomoyo's brother, respectively. Drove Tomoyo to a rage that got her killed. Didn't she? I wasn't positive, just suspected...'

 

"Are you going to say something?" Ushio asked, breaking his reverie.

 

He considered her thoughtfully. 'What did she do... Messed with my mind... Messed with Kotomi's mind... Kotomi. Yes, I remember Kotomi. She... was broken. Ever since Fujibayashi died. Did... something? Yes. I was thinking she did something... Would do something... Argh, damn it, why isn't it all coming together?'

 

"Ah.... Ah yes, I remember," Ushio said. "We both were confused when I did this to you. Took us both some time to piece it together. Take your time. There is more than enough here."

 

'That's right, she said she did something like this to... me? No, not me, another me. Another universe. And Kotomi did this? That seems right, yes. Why would she.... Because I killed her other friends. That's right. Except that might have been Ushio. I'll have to ask her, when I get my mind sorted. Minds? Yes. We were distributed. Many brains, one mind. How did I forget... Ah yes. Kotomi, again.'

 

An image of her flickered through his mind, a bright smile on her face. Flash. Dead eyes and no smile.

 

'I did that to her,' he reflected. 'Or at the least, I would have been willing to. Why? Oh. Paradox. We wanted to stop a paradox. Needed to, we thought. Wanted.... Didn't. That much I am certain is Ushio's fault. I... Don't think I could do that to Kotomi again. Not even for the sake of the universe. Seeing her die inside like that once was enough... And... Something else? What...'

 

The image of Kotomi's form, arcing with electricity flashed through his mind, and he forced it away.

 

'Oh gods. Yes. She died. After infecting me with the virus. I think it must have been grief that drove her to it...'

 

He mentally frowned.

 

'Gee, you think so? Think it was grief? No, I'm sure it was because she was JUST SUCH A HAPPY GO LUCKY PERSON. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN, IF SHE WENT AND KILLED HER ONCE BEST FRIEND LIKE THAT, HUH?'

 

He mentally took a deep breath, clearing his mind for a moment.

 

'Related note. Furukawa also died of grief, I think. Her body probably couldn't handle it. That's what Akio said, right? Yeah. Something like that. Ryota said something similar about Kyou, but she didn't die. Not physically anyway. Her mind just broke, left her almost mercifully rather than leaving her still tormented. Unlike Kotomi. She still continued on in spite of it. She always was a strong girl like that, wasn't she?'

 

That which was once Okazaki could feel the parts beginning to snap into place. Memories were beginning to reform without his input, thoughts and emotions beginning to properly return to his soul.

 

Along with extra memories that he knew he hadn't possessed when he had augmented himself a second time as Okazaki. There was no denying that they were his memories, however. Memories of a time shortly after he had been killed by his future self, though he hadn't know that at the time.

 

Many millinia worth of memories. Ushio had been right; it had taken him a very long time to figure out how to speak in this strange realm of hers. It had taken him decades to learn a way to communicate his second time around, in a crude fashion. That was because Ushio had told him how he had done it the first time. Like many such shortcuts, it got him there fast, but at the expense of all the other things he had learned in his attempt.

 

Small wonder she had thought his second attempt to be a pale shadow of what he once could do. 'And what did we talk about, I wonder? Let's see...' He thought back.

 

\----0----

 

"Welcome back," the girl that ran the strange realm he assumed to be the afterlife said.

 

"Thank you," he signed, stretching himself out to form the letters, thinning himself out almost to invisibility for the spaces. He wasn't sure how long it had taken him to learn to speak as he did. Time in that realm was difficult to keep track of; the sky never changed, and it seemed impossible to become bored. Particularly if one was focusing on a task. Even so, he knew it had been a very long time. Longer than he had spent alive, at least by three orders of magnitude.

 

It had been a side project of his as he learned how to talk again. Simply letting a fraction of himself count. Starting at one, and adding one about once every second. Simple task, helped to exercise his spirit. By the time he had felt he had mastered his form, the count had almost a trillion; after doing some quick calculations, equivalent to a period of time of roughly thirty thousand years, give or take a few hundred for inaccurate timekeeping.

 

It was a frightening amount of time, but that wasn't what bothered him the most about it. He wasn't sure what scared him the most. That it had taken him that long, that he hadn't even grown bored through the duration, or that he didn't feel any different than he had before he started. 'Strange realm,' he decided.

 

"Now that you can speak, I think it's time we had a little discussion," the girl said.

 

"Very well," he replied. "How about starting with who exactly it was that killed me?"

 

"You'll find out. Either way, it's for me to ask the questions and you to answer."

 

"...I don't do well with ultimatums."

 

"Regardless."

 

"I would tell you to sod off, but there doesn't appear to be much else to do around these parts. So ask your questions, and I will decide whether or not to answer."

 

The girl smiled slightly, one that didn't reach her eyes. "Good enough. What would you do with a second chance?"

 

"A second chance?"

 

"To live again."

 

"...Hm." 'Not screw everything up? Maybe do what we should have done at the outset? We'd still have to keep a military of sorts just because things have the chance to get messy, but... Hm. Not first again. I will not be the aggressor again. Defense is one thing, but that... I deserved what I got for that.' "I guess I would not make the mistakes that I made. Try to do things peacefully, if I could."

 

"If you could. Implies you might still continue fighting."

 

"I wouldn't start it, but I would damn well finish it. I still have a vested interest in seeing the world happier than it was."

 

"Because you were doing such a good job of it."

 

"Well, if that... Other hivemind hadn't have attacked me, I... Probably wouldn't have done so well with that method either. No. I'm not too proud to admit I screwed up fierce, trying to do things by force. Even if the ends justify the means, there's usually a better way."

 

"Good. Good answer. Maybe there's hope for you yet."

 

"Gee, thanks for that vote of confidence."

 

"You're welcome," she said, without a trace of irony.

 

"So having answered a question, why don't you answer one for me? Who are you?"

 

"You may call me Ushio. Now then. It's time for you to go."

 

"Go? What do-"

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki's memories of the realm stopped there, replaced with the flashes of diffuse light and sound he associated with his infantile years. A few more memories, half remembered dreams brought back into clarity, of her watching him, sending petty hexes at him, tormenting him while he couldn't escape. Most of his memories he had of her while he was alive were from that time. Memories of a woman who's very presence pained him.

 

'Well,' he reflected. 'That answers that much, anyway.' He contemplated Ushio again. 'So. She must have expected that to mean that I would have stopped my past self. Or else what she said to me the second time I was here wouldn't make sense. Why? Supposedly, she's seen how this goes. She should have known. And... Everything else. Damn it all. Let's just ask her. Get it over with.'

 

"Ushio," he signed, the name fully formed of his spiritual material.

 

"I see you've regained your faculties," Ushio replied. "And your skills."

 

"So it would seem."

 

"So how was your trip?"

 

"...Hmph. You have to ask? Ms. 'I can see both sides'?"

 

"You seem bitter."

 

"No. You don't say. What a startling revelation."

 

Ushio smiled slightly. "Just making small talk. There's no need to take that tone with me."

 

"Then I will just cut to the chase. Why did you think there was any doubt that I would do what I did?"

 

"I didn't."

 

If he had eyes, he would have blinked. "You didn't?"

 

"That's right. I knew you would do exactly what you did."

 

"Then... why did you try to dissuade me from doing it?"

 

"Honestly? Just a wish. To achieve the right path, I had to do a number of things I didn't really wish to do."

 

'Here it comes...' "Explain that to me."

 

"I created a paradox."

 

"That's it?"

 

She looked at him silently, emotionlessly.

 

"That's not it," he signed after a few moments, "is it? I know you've been interfering with events, you said as much yourself."

 

"Yes."

 

"So I have to wonder... Fujibayashi... It's exceedingly unlikely that shards of glass could line up like that."

 

"And what are you implying?"

 

"Did you kill Fujibayashi?"

 

"You killed Fujibayashi," Ushio stated. "It was your actions that caused that fight, your very own finger was on the trigger of the weapon."

 

"I don't buy that," Okazaki replied.

 

"That doesn't matter."

 

"Fine. How about Tomoyo? I know you have the power to enhance an emotion. The urge to kill me, after Tamafuki died? I also know you can make a group of people not look in a certain direction. I don't know where Tomoyo got her weapons, but it couldn't be legally, not in Japan."

 

"And?"

 

"And, she was shot to death by the police. Right in front of me, I might add."

 

"You bring that side out in people," Ushio said, allowing a smirk to grace her face. "Have you considered maybe she just got lucky with the weapons?"

 

"I buy that even less," Okazaki replied.

 

"And that matters even less."

 

"Fine then. Again, how about Tomoyo? She almost caused a paradox. I had to eat minds just to be sure what she did wouldn't cause one. Not that it did any good in the end, of course. Still, I could have done something about her if the fact she might have done that hadn't slipped my mind. Perhaps she might have lived that way, at least."

 

"Don't blame me for that slipping your mind."

 

"I buy that least of all."

 

"And that also matters least of all. Do you have any other examples you wish to cite?"

 

"You know, no. I don't. I'm going. I won't be returning here."

 

"You can't leave this realm."

 

"No, but I can try and see if it has an edge."

 

"...I see." Ushio looked at him for a moment before sighing. "Very well. I did do all of that. Except for your not thinking about Tomoyo causing a paradox. You legitimately just didn't think about that until it was too late."

 

Okazaki took a moment to respond, alternatively battling confusion and rage in his mind. "It's nice to see you so forthcoming."

 

"You were going to find out anyway."

 

"I'm not going to even ask. I don't want to know right now. I want you to know something instead. When you killed Fujibayashi, you destroyed everything. Kyou lost her mind. Furukawa went into a coma, then died. Kotomi..."

 

"And if you hadn't have decided to fight, none of that would have happened."

 

"I don't think I can forgive you for that."

 

"I don't think I can forgive you for what you did either."

 

"I never killed innocent people without damn good cause, Ushio."

 

"I did what I had to. You of all people should be familiar with that concept."

 

"And why did you 'have to'?"

 

"In order to learn the mind eating virus Kotomi made."

 

"...But..."

 

"Yes, it violates traditional causality. This is the multiverse. Most such temporal rules do not apply."

 

"...So... you needed the mind eating virus to defeat me... but..."

 

"Yes. It's a paradox. It's also a paradox if I didn't. Curious effect, is it not?"

 

"Ungh..." He tried to work out the threads involved. To get the mind eating virus, she would need to bend a reality in on itself. But in order to bend reality in on itself, she needed to be properly dead? And to be properly dead, she had to unleash the mind eating virus on him before he could simply absorb her...

 

Causality paradoxes were a bitch.

 

"You know, it doesn't matter," Okazaki signed. "Even if it was to prevent a paradox, even if that fact makes me a hypocrit, I can't forgive you."

 

"Wait."

 

"No. I've had enough. I've done enough. This is it. I am out of here. Fuck you, fuck the multiverse, fuck everything. And to be sure you have the message, fuck you especially."

 

Okazaki silently floated out the door, watching behind him as Ushio raised an eyebrow at him, before she disappeared behind the door frame. He then began floating in the direction he thought the pool of water was in. He was going to be there a while, after all. 'Might as well make the most of it.'

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki found the lake easily enough. It was where he remembered it to be, both from when he had used it during his dream, and when he had been dead.

 

'And now that I'm dead again,' he thought wryly. 'Fitting, really.'

 

He regarded his reflection in the mirror-like surface for a moment. 'All I will be for eternity... A big blob of protoplasm. Heh. Reminds me of my first life.' If he had a head, he would have shaken it in amusement. 'Well, what am I going to do? Eternity's a long time. Huh. Suppose I could just start counting. It's what we did when we were dead the first time. Would be fitting, really. Old habits die hard, after all.'

 

He stretched and bent himself, forming a perfect '1'. Roughly a second later, he bent into a '2'. About a second later, '3'. And so on.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki counted.

 

"592,481,285... 592,481,286..."

 

He didn't get bored. It had always been like that in the realm. Even thirty thousand plus years figuring out how to stretch and bend his spirit hadn't bored him. A little over eightteen and three quarters years were nothing.

 

\----0----

 

"631,138,520,000... 631,138,520,001..."

 

Okazaki contemplated the water thoughtfully. Roughly twenty thousand years, still no boredom in spite of just counting. Not even with purpose. Just... counting.

 

He pondered also the surroundings, for a moment. He hadn't thought about it in a long time, but it seemed like there were an awful lot of the other spirits present. He wasn't sure what that meant.

 

\----0----

 

"25,929,347,829,494... 25,929,347,829,495..."

 

Okazaki didn't pause his counting, as he contemplated the nature of his new reality for yet another time. 'Almost eight hundred twenty two thousand years. Now that's a long time. Curious. I don't feel bored, either. Such a bizarre realm... Huh.'

 

A new thought entered his head, one that hadn't for a long time. When was the last time he'd seen another spirit? He searched his memories, still counting. 'Sometime around forty thousand years after I got here? Huh. There used to be so many... Where did they go?'

 

He pondered the situation. From what he remembered, spirits would stick around, perhaps for as long as a few years, slowly floating upward until they disappeared from sight. As far as he knew, he was the sole exception to the rule. He'd tried floating up a few times, just to see what the fuss was about, but found himself thoroughly grounded. He could only manage a few yard high, before he floated back down, unable to continue.

 

He thought further back, trying to remember some of the specific spirits. He remembered that one could feel emotions radiate from them, if one focused on them. The trouble was, he hadn't focused on them. Not even as they dwindled in number. Not even as the last spirit disappeared from view. He just counted. And now that he had it in his mind to wonder, it was far too late to find out.

 

It didn't stop him from theorizing however, as he continued to count. If the realm was the afterlife, then it could be that there was a mass dying of humanity following his death. Enough perhaps that it could be considered extinction; particularly as he hadn't seen any other spirits around for so long. The other alternative was that humanity had found immortality, but the way he had left earth made it seem unlikely.

 

If it was just a realm of spirits, the same story was told. There were no more spirits around, ergo, no more humanity. He let the thought stew for a while, silently counting. The most likely culpret was radiation poisoning. The massed nuclear bombardment had mostly stripped away the protective ozone layer. He'd had plans to fix the damage, but then Kotomi had killed him.

 

He paused his counting, for the barest instant, before resuming. Kotomi. He hadn't thought of her in a long time, choosing instead to focus solely on his counting. The pain of her death still felt like ripping open an only partly healed wound, even after almost eight hundred twenty two thousand years. He wondered, idly, if that was a product of that strange realm as well.

 

He shook thoughts of her off. It was running, he knew, but he still couldn't face it, even after so long. So he sunk himself into his counting, letting his mind once more become an empty void.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki would have blinked, if he'd had eyes.

 

"186,017,101,005,349,913... 186,017,101,005,349,914..."

 

Ushio was there. That was new. He almost hadn't noticed, so entranced by his counting. He realized she was saying something.

 

"-suppose what I'm trying to say is that I'm sorry. Even if it was necessary-"

 

He tuned her out. Even after...

 

'My god. I've been here almost six billion years. How do you not notice that? It just all seems to blur...'

 

He didn't notice when she left, fists balled and an angry frown on her face.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki would have blinked, if he'd had eyes.

 

"378,230,119,112,009,090... 378,230,119,112,009,091..."

 

Ushio was there again. He did the mental arithematic. Almost twelve billion years. He was getting close to the same age as the universe. For what little it mattered; time didn't seem to have meaning in the afterlife, and he never got bored. And counting was almost like meditation in a way. Years and years of thoughtless trance, just floating and shifting patterns, ever so slightly.

 

He considered her as she stood there, watching him blankly, arms crossed in front of her. Whatever she was here for, he didn't want any part of it. There was no forgiveness in his heart. He continued to count.

 

She left a little over a year later, having not said a word.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki would have blinked, if he'd had eyes.

 

"597,866,878,495,641,984... 597,866,878,495,641,985..."

 

Ushio was there again. He did the mental arithematic. A little over 18 million years. The universe had been estimated to be around 13.5 billion years, when he died. Somehow, he'd failed to notice he'd outlasted that projection by a few billion.

 

The inanity of the thought struck him as amusing, for a few moments. The numbers kept getting bigger, the timescale kept getting vaster, and all he could think of was that he didn't notice he'd crossed such a vast swathe. And still he wasn't bored. After billions of years doing nothing but count, he wasn't bored. The years just breezed by him like a warm wind, barely noticed. All of them the same.

 

He regarded her with indifference as she stood before him, blankly watching him in return, arms crossed in front of her. He still didn't want anything to do with her. Still, it was interesting. She'd visited three times, with roughly the same amount of time between each visit. He started a separate counter.

 

"3."

 

She raised an eyebrow. "Does this mean you're ready to talk to me again?"

 

'Why does she think that, after all this time, I would have anything to say to her? Curious.' He kept counting.

 

She left a little over a year and a half later.

 

\----0----

 

"1,356,804,496,982,121,284, 6... 1,356,804,496,982,121,285, 6..."

 

For an instant, a sensation descended on Okazaki, one that felt strangely familiar. But it was gone as soon as it was felt.

 

'Curious... I wonder what that was...'

 

He kept counting.

 

\----0----

 

"2,857,695,687,952,282,148, 15... 2,857,695,687,952,282,149, 15..."

 

The sensation struck Okazaki again. This time it did not leave, even as he felt it.

 

'Ninety and a half billion years to feel boredom. That's interesting. I had thought it impossible here. That is boredom, right? This is what boredom felt like? It was so long ago now... So very long ago...'

 

Still, he counted.

 

\----0----

 

"500^8 + 20^9 + 5,684,688, 20,624... 500^8 + 20^9 + 5,684,689, 20,624..."

 

Okazaki wasn't ashamed to admit he was bored. Amazed perhaps, in a dulled, slow way; as like one whom has spent an eternity stuck in a trance, only to have awareness returning and chipping away at the very edges of one's mind. He had taken, at first, to simply expressing the numbers he counted as mathematical expressions; ranging from complex to simple, dependent solely on what was convenient.

 

It had satisfied him, for a long time. Boredom was difficult enough to experience in the realm, and even doing nothing but count would keep it away for eons. And yet, even that had reached the limit of entertainment some time ago.

 

That was why he was trying something different. The orb of his soul stuff that floated to the side was shaped like a human head, almost. It was an entirely different way of forming himself, and he likened it to the difference between text on the first computer screens and high resolution video. It was obvious to him that it would take huge amounts of time to perfect. It was fortunate, perhaps, that time was endless in the realm.

 

Occasionally as he practiced, though, the thought crept into his mind that time might not be as infinite there as he thought. For instance, he was sure that, at one time, the plants of the land had been green. If they had, that color had faded into a brilliant gold, one he associated with ripe wheat.

 

It was a change so subtle though, that it only occurred to him once in a billion years or so, and was dismissed as irrelevant. He couldn't be sure, not about that. He'd been there too long to say. It all faded into an ever growing number.

 

\----0----

 

"256^14 + 32^6 + 912, 41,345... 256^14 + 32^6 + 913, 41,345..."

 

It slowly occurred to Okazaki that he had not seen Ushio in a long time. Even for the realm, it had been a very long time. He thought back, trying to recall the last time he had seen her.

 

It didn't matter though, he decided, as he looked at the mirror image of Kotomi in the water. It wasn't perfect, a bit on the angular, grainy side, but it was much better than it had been when he had started.

 

He missed her. He missed her dearly. She was the one thing he remembered clearly. His first meeting her. Bringing her to meet friends. The sudden rush of feelings he had for her when she recited lines from 'De Vermis Mysteriis'. Simply sitting and enjoying her company as they read books together. The sense of elation he felt when he halfway confessed to her. Those horrible months following Fujibayashi's death. And then her own death.

 

It was perhaps a bit masochistic, he reflected. But seeing her, even just like that, made him feel slightly less alone.

 

\----0----

 

"10^72 + 523^32 + 6, 41,345... 100^72 + 523^32 + 7, 41,345..."

 

Okazaki had mastered the trick. If he looked, he could see Kotomi, plain as day. The reflection that stared back at him was perfect. He could even make it move.

 

He let it fade with a mental sigh. It just didn't bring him comfort anymore. All it did was remind him that she wasn't there.

 

Perhaps if she were, the loneliness would be more bearable. Perhaps she might have, in time, come to forgive him. Perhaps in time, they might have simply read a book together, watched a show together, just spent time together.

 

But she was not there. And he was just deluding himself.

 

A thought wriggled in the back of his mind that, in her cabin, Ushio waited. If nothing else, he could have someone to talk to.

 

He pushed the thought out. What was done was done. There would be no forgiveness.

 

\----0----

 

"10^97 + 10^48 + 1, 41,345... 100^97 + 10^48 + 2, 41,345..."

 

The number made Okazaki mentally giggle slightly. He did the same thing each time he had a 100-10-1 sequence like that. It lasted but an instant in a world of eternity, but it still made him want to laugh each time. He suspected he was beginning to well and truly lose his sanity.

 

For instance, he was pretty sure that, at one time, there had been grass in the realm. Green grass, that had spanned for as long as the eye could see. But he could no longer tell if that was real or just a delusion; the land now was barren, devoid of anything resembling life.

 

For another thing, he was sure that, once, there had been a pool here. A small pool of water, where he had practiced his numbers. 'And... something else?' He couldn't remember. The pool, if it had ever existed, had dried up many exponents before.

 

Exponents. He was sure he was approaching a unique one. Maybe he'd stop when he hit it. Maybe it'd all come back to him if he wasn't doing the same thing for eon upon eon. Maybe he'd remember what that second number was for.

 

He kept counting, as he had for time immemorial.

 

\----0----

 

"10^100, 41,345... 1-"

 

Okazaki stopped counting.

 

'10^100? A googol? I... Did I just hit a googol? That's...'

 

Memories began to trickle back. Slowly at first, as he looked at the land with perception that had been dulled to the extreme by a trillion eternities of counting. Then they flooded back, as he started to remember.

 

'My god. A googol. That's... I've been doing this a very long time. Isn't... Isn't that past the age of baryonic matter? And... This place? I...'

 

He had a headache, which was impressive for someone that no longer had a head.

 

'That's... I've been here almost long enough to experience the heat death of the universe. Or at least, it would be if I were still alive, in the actual universe...' He regarded the parched, cracked ground, ground that had once been host to green grass and a small pool of water. 'Seems that entropy even affects this place. Wow. A googol. I... What now?'

 

He contemplated, for a moment, counting to another googol.

 

'NO. No. If I count again, I'm going to literally go off my gourd. If I never think of a number again it will be too soon. Fuck. Why didn't I stop sooner? Oh. Because I was mad at Ushio.'

 

He wanted to laugh. That was so long ago now. So very, impossibly long ago. And he was still angry with her. It was sort of funny, really. 'Always knew I could hold a grudge, but this is just ridiculous. Fuck me. A googol? Really? Crap on a crutch. You know, hell with it. I can't take another second of counting. I really can't, not now that I've snapped out of it.'

 

He cast his perception in the direction of Ushio's cabin.

 

'Yeah, but if we go there, it's admitting defeat. Though, I suppose she did come this way first. Hah! Outlasted you, you bitch! Well, let's go see if she's gone whacko! This'll be fun!'

 

And on that note, he started floating toward Ushio's shack.

 

(I have to admit I liked the idea of repetition for this chapter. It was thematically fitting, anyway. Almost a shame I had to nix the whole thing.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 18: Coming Back To Life

 

The first thing Okazaki noticed as he approached Ushio's shack was that it had no roof. He idly considered the thought that he might simply be misremembering it ever having a roof, and the intervening eternities had warped his memories in some fashion, but he dismissed it as unlikely. It wouldn't make any sense to have a shack without a roof, after all.

 

'No sense, no sense, no sense... No, must have had a roof. Must have, must have...'

 

He shook himself out of it, his mind trying to automatically return to repetition. A tendril of his soulstuff began to wriggle, trying to form a number, and he suppressed it, his form shuddering as he did so.

 

'Did that for way too long. Too long. Too long, too long... NO.'

 

He wondered if he would ever be able to shake the urge to return to repetition, as he floated onward toward the shack.

 

\----0----

 

Ushio sat, propped against one of the walls of the shack, as Okazaki entered. He gave himself eyes for a moment, just so he could blink them; he remembered what she had looked like, the last time he had seen her. She could have passed for someone in their twenties.

 

Now, she looked like a well seasoned woman in her seventies or eighties.

 

'Entropy even affects this place,' he reflected as he considered her unmoving form. She might as well have been dead, her vacant stare at nothing bringing him a small measure of discomfort. '...Might as well be? She already is dead. I'm dead. We're all dead here! Dead. Dead... Dead...' He shook away the urge to be repetitive, and moved into her line of sight.

 

No reaction.

 

"Oi," he signed. "Ushio!"

 

A singular twitch at the corner of her eye made him think it was working.

 

"Wake up, rise and shine, et cetera, ad nauseum!"

 

Slowly, her eyes closed, then opened again. A slow blink. She blinked again, slightly faster.

 

"Good," he signed. "That's good. Now, you ready to talk?"

 

"Guah," she gasped dryly, opening and closing her mouth while blinking blearily.

 

"Guah yourself."

 

She slowly raised her arm up, bringing her hand forward to deliver an obscene gesture in his direction.

 

"Oh, that's too bad, you haven't completely lost your marbles. I was sort of thinking it might be funny. Funny. Funny..." He shook away the urge to be repetitive.

 

"W-well," she said, her voice cracking as she spoke, "to bad. I'm still... still here."

 

"So I see. Well then! How about let's you and me talk then, huh? How about it, huh? Huh?"

 

"Why? You were silent all those years..."

 

"Yeah, well, you didn't exactly make me want to talk to you. But since I reached a googol, I figure, you know, what the hell! Let bygones be bygones. It's been an awful long time. Awful long... Very awful long..."

 

"Yes. Almost you waited too late."

 

"What? Too late for what?" He formed himself into a crude head, just so he could raise an eyebrow at her.

 

"Ah, that's a new trick," she remarked, unsteadily rising to her feet.

 

"Yes, well, when all you do is count, sooner or later you end up getting bored. Very bored. Very... Ah, you have to find a diversion, you see. Keeps you from going mad. Mad!"

 

"I don't think it worked very well for you."

 

"Give me a break, I just counted to a fucking googol."

 

"Yes, and I waited around while you counted to a fucking googol. No breaks for you."

 

"Two weeks?" he suggested.

 

She sneered at him.

 

"Whatever," he said, giving his form shoulders so he could shrug them. "Say, where's the robot? Robot... Robot?"

 

"Father... left."

 

"What a shame, why?"

 

"After seeing what I did, he realized something about me."

 

"What, that you're the queen bitch of bitches everywhere?"

 

"Yes. I am, as you say, the queen bitch of bitches everywhere. And do you want to know why, exactly, I am the queen bitch of bitches everywhere?"

 

"I don't know that I really care."

 

"You corrupt everything you touch, you know. Without fail. You corrupted the technology, you corrupted Kotomi, and you corrupted me." Her countenance, for a bare instant, rippled, and for a moment he thought he saw something familiar, the ghost of a face he had seen many times before in a mirror.

 

"...I see."

 

"Yes."

 

"So... What, you're me?"

 

"I have a fragment of you, the first you, in my soul."

 

"Oh. Huh. Well, that's interesting and all, what did you mean I was almost too late?"

 

Ushio smiled, a bitter, dry smile. "Why, I'm going to send you back again, of course."

 

"...What." It took him a moment to think to add his eye twitching to his false head. 'She is... maddenly inconsistent.'

 

"That's right. I'm going to send you back. Give you a third chance at life."

 

"But-" He interrupted himself before he could say anything about a paradox. He'd witnessed a paradox already. The universe had held steadfastly together in spite of the rules of causality being bent over a table and screwed none too gently.

 

"Yes?"

 

"...Okay, why are you... You... Gah!" He created an arm and hand, just so he could properly facepalm. "Okay. Why are you sending me back?"

 

"Do you think I want to see everyone dead?"

 

"So they did die."

 

"What do you think? You sealed those bunkers up. When Kotomi unleashed that mind plague on you, those bunkers stayed sealed. And with no way to grow food without you there to do it for them, they eventually all starved to death.

 

Ushio narrowed her eyes at him. "And it wasn't like there was any help coming from outside the bunkers; with the ozone layer depleted and all that radiation from those nukes you set off, those few you left outside started getting cancer and dying. Oh, and they couldn't do anything about that because you destroyed more or less all the infrastructure."

 

"...So you're saying that I killed humanity?"

 

"That's right."

 

"Well. I guess if one screws up, one might as well screw up big."

 

Ushio fixed him with a withering glare.

 

He formed himself into a crude head with a cheeky grin.

 

She sighed and rolled her eyes. "So I'm sending you back. To make sure that everyone lives."

 

"...I'll be able to see Kotomi again?"

 

"That's right," she said. "But there's more."

 

"Uh-oh," he signed.

 

"I'm coming with you."

 

"...What?"

 

"I've sent you back once, with the implicit understanding that you would be stopping yourself from starting another war. And, well, look what happened. You started another war. No, this time I'm coming with you to make sure you don't do it again."

 

"Uh, in case you haven't noticed, I thought there was going to be a universe ending paradox if I didn't. One way or another, you disproved that."

 

"This isn't up for negotiation. I am coming with you, and that's final."

 

He gave his head a frown, to express his displeasure. "...I'm going to let that slide for the moment, and just point out that I can only barely stand you, and that's only because this is the most conversation I've had in a good many eternities. And I'm pretty sure you aren't exactly fond of me, either."

 

"That's true. Regardless, I have to be sure. And regardless, my presense is necessary to do this."

 

"...Is this some sort of metaphysical thing?"

 

"Just so."

 

"You probably could have saved a little time by just saying that."

 

"This is the most conversation I've had in a good many eternities. Even if it's with you, I feel compelled to extend it arbitrarily."

 

"...Let's just get this over with."

 

Ushio pouted for a moment, before regaining her previous, neutral expression. "Fine. But there's one last thing you should know."

 

"Oh for fuck's sake. You've answered all my questions, what more is there?"

 

"I have made... an adjustment to reality. Brought something over from elsewhere."

 

"Eh?"

 

"There would be a species of alien out there that would probably seem rather familiar to you that would have arrived a good ten years after you ruined the biosphere. Rather slow to progress technologically, with military capabilities that are somewhat lackluster in spite of their imperialistic tendencies thanks to their culture not feeling a need to advance military technology too much. You see, they came rather expecting to find humans to be fielding knights on horseback at the most still, as all alien races they had found followed the same patterns of technological advancement."

 

"It sounds like you're describing the Race from Harry Turtledove's WorldWar series."

 

"Doesn't it, though?"

 

Okazaki pondered this for a few moments. "You mean to say you dragged a whole new planet from a fictional reality to this reality?"

 

"In a manner of speaking," Ushio replied.

 

He made a raised a finger as if to make a statement, before letting his soulstuff reform again as the implications began to catch up with him. It was only at length that he found he could speak again. "That raises some... disturbing implications about this reality."

 

Ushio merely smirked.

 

"I suppose getting an explanation is out of the question."

 

"It's one of those things I cannot properly explain. It will suffice to say though, that first, all fiction really is real. And second, it's fairly easy to poke something through from one universe to another, from a seventh dimensional perspective."

 

"...Moving right along, how are we going to return?"

 

"Oh, that? We'll have to merge."

 

"Sounds kinky."

 

"Not in a million googols."

 

"Heh. Agreed."

 

"I don't know what bothers me more," Ushio admitted. "That in order for this to work I have to merge with you, that talking to you remains a difficult exercise in self control, or that after all this time alone, talking to you makes me yearn to be alone again!"

 

"Oh, definitely option one," Okazaki replied snidely. "Though option two has some merit... Yes, merit... Merit... Gah!"

 

"Problem?"

 

"No. Shut up. Leave me alone."

 

"I almost feel sorry for you. Almost. Except that you did that to yourself, tried to do it to me, and you really did do it all to yourself."

 

"Ugh. If we merge, will that at least shut you up?"

 

"I'm really feeling the love."

 

"Stop that. It freaks me out when I hear you parroting my brand of sarcasm."

 

"Is it yours or is it mine?"

 

"What do you mean?"

 

"Remember that I do have a part of you inside me."

 

"If anything, the way you put that is even more disturbing than hearing my sarcasm in your voice."

 

Ushio glared at him. "Because I chose to have my mind raped and my soul tainted by your essence."

 

Okazaki formed an upraised finger from his soulstuff.

 

"Charming. Let's just get this over with."

 

"Yes. Lets. What do we need to do?"

 

"Stand still for a moment."

 

"As you may have noticed, I lack the legs to stand."

 

"So form some."

 

"Yes ma'am, at once ma'am, anything you say ma'am."

 

"Just shut up and be still."

 

"Fine."

 

"And stop talking."

 

Okazaki made his soulstuff head roll its eyes before going motionless.

 

Ushio shook her head and rolled her eyes in turn, before pushing herself woodenly into a standing position. She took a step, unsteadily at first, but gaining confidence with each step, as if unlocking old memories. Forward she came, until she had stopped in front of Okazaki.

 

He refrained from raising an eyebrow. Apparently absolute stillness was required.

 

She took another step, and was inside Okazaki.

 

\----0----

 

Energy. Okazaki was aware of energy being released. The scientific part of his mind wondered idly what form of energy it was. The part of him that was Ushio told him it was more the 'concept' of energy, a close analog to Plato's theory of forms, and the closest thing to 'pure energy' as existed. He mentally shrugged, deciding it didn't really matter, causing the part of him that was Ushio to give a frustrated sigh.

 

'Fun. Nothing like tormenting your arch nemesis. Except my arch nemesis is me? And her? Actually, this is sort of confusing.'

 

His ethereal senses looked on as the remnants of Ushio's shack flung apart, reminding him of matchsticks in a cyclone. The landscape under him deformed, the immense raw power once locked in Ushio's form joining to his own reserves and wreaking havoc with the terrain.

 

'Pity I can't bring this back with me. I could think of a few uses for this. Ah, but it's probably just as well. Don't want to get drunk with power. Again.'

 

As suddenly as the outpouring of energy began, it stopped, as Okazaki solidified control over his energies. He looked over the crater that used to be Ushio's shack and blinked.

 

'Reminds me of Dragonball Z. Gods, that show was awful. Liked it as a kid though. Hm.' He mentally shook his head. 'Ah, enough woolgathering. It's time to return, isn't it?'

 

He shimmered and disappeared.

 

\----0----

 

With a gasp, Okazaki woke up.

 

Breathing came instinctually. As did blinking. It took him a moment to remember how to move his arms and legs.

 

"Guah," he announced. His tongue and vocal cords hadn't been used in a trillion eternities or since the day before, depending on perspective; either way he couldn't remember how to use them properly. "Uh.... Uhng.... Um.... Ah... aha... am-mmm..." He coughed violently, having had forgotten how to deal with saliva. 'Curses and damnation, was I always this clumsy? No, no I wasn't. Just haven't had a body in 10^93 years. 10^93 plus 1... NO.'

 

Another presense made itself known in his mind.

 

'Oh, my past self... Past Okazaki? Not Past? Yes, that's right. It's me. Was always me. Er. Okay, we know what to do. Or Ushio does. Hope this doesn't end in a fight. Shit. Okay. Hello!'

 

'Huh? Who.... What the hell?' He felt a probing sensation along the edge of his soul. 'Has my hivemind been compromised somehow? Shit, this is bad timing.'

 

'Oh, no, friend, it's me! I'm you! From a trillion eternities in the future!'

 

'...You've got to be shitting me.'

 

'Not at all! Hey, you want to fuse souls? Lots of fun!'

 

'...If this is me, er, you, er...'

 

'Yes. No, time has not been good to us. But it gets better! Ushio causes a paradox, so it was completely for nothing that we got Fujibayashi and Tomoyo killed, Kyou in a nuthouse, Furukawa in a death coma, and Kotomi homicidal slash suicidal! Isn't that great?'

 

"I... wait... what?'

 

'Oh yes. Everyone died, for nothing! Paradox happened anyway, so their sacrifices were completely in vain! But we're back to stop it all from happening! Isn't that wonderful?'

 

'You.... I.... Okay. What the flipping flying fuck happened? Assuming I buy any of this?'

 

'Oh, that laser beam our mutual past self fired off clipped Fujibayashi in the head, one of our .50 BMG shells went straight through our past self and whacked Tomoyo's brother, and... well, it all went downhill from there. Tomoyo got on a mad vengeance trip and tried to whack us at the police station, got whacked by the police in turn.... Kyou actually saw Fujibayashi, and.... Damn. I just remembered that look on her face when she did.'

 

'That's... actually fairly convincing, you know.'

 

'Yeah. Um. Sorry, this is a bit difficult to remember. Uh, both because it was such a godawful time and because it was about, oh, what did I say? A trillion eternities ago?'

 

'Yes, you've mentioned how long it's been.'

 

'Right. Anyway, yes. Furukawa got into some sort of coma and died; don't think losing her friends was good for her spirit. Probably just... gave up the will to live. Only heard afterward from a very pissed off Akio. And then there's Kotomi...'

 

'Yes. What happened with.... Wait. Let me guess. Given that it was one hundred percent our own doing, she was compelled to try and kill me, and then herself, probably because she didn't take killing her once only friend very well?'

 

'Hole in one.'

 

'I.... Did she succeed?'

 

'Yes. Doesn't matter which bit you're talking about, either. Total party kill. Turns out that thing that Ushio brought back and killed, er, the other us with, was the same mind eating virus Kotomi made.'

 

'...Wait, do you mean-'

 

'Yes, it's a paradox. I had the same reaction.'

 

'...Naturally.'

 

'Anyway, we still need to whack Past.'

 

'Past? Oh, our past self. Nice monicker.'

 

'Indeed! So shall we fuse spirits?'

 

'I... am uncomfortable with that idea, even knowing you're me.'

 

'Yeah, well, we could fight over it, but then I don't think we'd be able to take on Past. Besides. Do you really feel like telling them what you're going to be doing?'

 

'...No, but I'm not sure it's worth losing sense of self.'

 

'Who's losing sense of self? We're just going to become ourself. Er. Well, no different than we've ever been.'

 

'Will doing this stop us from trying to work out the proper pronouns?'

 

'Probably!'

 

'Fuck it, I'm sold.'

 

It was a bit like when he had first become distributed. Two consciousnesses, both almost the same, _mingled_ as essences converged. In one instant, there were two consciousnesses; the next, just one.

 

But there was a roadblock. Thousands of minds tried to reconcile eons of memories. It lasted for only a few moments. Then the software did its job, and the memories merged.

 

"Woah..." Okazaki stated, blinking as his other minds started to wake. "Okay. Well. Don't do that every day. And.... Huh." 'We're back right after we woke up that last time we talked to Ushio. That's weird.'

 

The part of him that was Ushio noted that it made perfect sense from an extradimensional, spiritual standpoint. It was the last time he had been to the spiritual realm; by the way the looped structure of the universe's afterlife, that was the only place to return to.

 

'That's great, but I was aiming for the night before we decided to tell everyone what happened.'

 

'Too bad, this is how it works.'

 

'Gee, thanks for that warning Ushio. You're such a major help.'

 

'Stop bickering with yourself, there's work to be done.'

 

'Bah! How's this for doing work?'

 

And on that unusual note, he went to sleep.

 

\----0----

 

'Okay, so how are we going to face down our past self...?' Okazaki drummed his fingers on his knee thoughtfully as he sat on the edge of his bed. 'Could jump from the- no, better not, last time that happened we tried to take a shot at ourself and it killed Fujibayashi. So... maybe not waiting, just leap out- you know, screw it, jumping out the window is a terrible idea.'

 

His musing was interrupted by a knocking on his door.

 

"Ah, one second," he said, and stood up. 'Now, if I remember right, that's Tomoyo. Tomoyo...' For a moment, he was caught by the image of Tomoyo, laying on the floor of a jail cell and lacking a considerable portion of her head. '...Damn it.' He took a deep breath, plastered a smile on his face, and walked toward the door.

 

As he opened the door, an outstretched hand reaching up to knock on the door instead knocked on his face instead.

 

He blinked. 'Hey, that happened last time, too.'

 

"Ah, Okazaki, I did not mean to- um..." Tomoyo started, then took note of his attire, or lack thereof.

 

"Huh?" He blinked and looked down at himself. 'Oh. Clothes. Those are a thing. Forgot about that.' He looked back up at her increasingly readening face. "Er, one second." He slowly let the door close. 'Well, that was awkward. Hm.' He retreated to his room to dress.

 

\----0----

 

"Do you always answer the door like..." Tomoyo asked a few minutes later, after a fully dressed Okazaki let her in.

 

"Oh, no, only when I spend a trillion eternities locked in a nightmare, and forget about basic things such as clothing," Okazaki replied.

 

She blinked, then raised an eyebrow at him. "I.... What?"

 

"Long story," he admitted with a grin. "Long story short, I'm back from a particularly dystopian future where everyone died, and it was all my fault. But I'm back to make things better!"

 

She opened her mouth as if to say something, then shut it. Then she opened it again. She shut it again with a blink.

 

"It sounds crazy, doesn't it?" He shrugged. "I know that. But it's the truth. ...Oh! I can lend it some credibility, too. Look." He held out his hands, and let the tools in his hands swap themselves out.

 

She jumped back, surprised. "What the hell?"

 

"Oh, I'm mostly machine, distributed among a whole heaping mess of bodies, and brought about the end of the world as we know it in a now hopefully nonexistent future." He let the tools swap back into his hands. "...Oh! If you need more proof, I can bring up another one of me from the elevator."

 

Tomoyo took a step backward, before shaking her head and taking a step forward. "If I didn't just see you do that thing with your hands, I would think you had gone insane."

 

"Who says I didn't?" He winked. "I did spend an awful long time dead," his voice began to fade off, "doing nothing but counting..." He shook his head vigorously. "Gah! Bad times!"

 

She took a step backward again.

 

"Yeah, sorry, I really didn't have a good time with everything. Ugh. At least I had a trillion eternities to think about what I'd done. Well, when I actually spent time thinking, awful easy to just let yourself go on autopilot..."

 

"A trillion eternities?"

 

"Oh, yeah, I counted to a googol. In seconds. That's, what... ten to the ninety three years?" He scratched his chin. "Very long time. Very long. Very..." He shook his head again. "It breeds deep seated habits, just to keep from completely going insane. Kept counting, and counting, and... Argh." He massaged his temples.

 

"I-I can come back later," Tomoyo said, pointing toward the door.

 

"No, you're fine... Although, wait, isn't class..." He scratched his chin. "Yeah, come back later. Or don't, if you think I'm completely off my rocker and should be avoided."

 

"Frankly, I don't know what to think," she admitted with a sigh. "I mean, you answer the door naked, say a bunch of insane sounding things, and then you do that thing with your hands, and then you say even more insane sounding things...."

 

"Yeah. Well, I won't blame you if you just want to go and not come back, as I say. But, ah..." 'It's good to see you alive again, and not hating my guts. Even if you think I'm mad as a hatter.' "...Well, it's nothing."

 

"Um, right. Okazaki kun, I'm going to go now."

 

"Ah, well, take care then. Have fun at school."

 

"Um, sure. Goodbye."

 

"Bye!"

 

She walked out the door, and Okazaki watched her go silently with an amused smile. At least she would survive, if everything went well. Everyone would. And, at least she hadn't asked what had happened to her. He didn't know how he would answer that.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki spent the next few hours trying not to pace, instead settling himself in to watch The Twilight Zone. Way he figured it, he had a heap of new years and fourth of Julys to catch up on. As the hour approached that he vaguely remembered Kyou coming over though, he paused the video and walked toward the door.

 

At a precise time, he opened the door and found Kyou, fist raised to knock. He blinked, caught up for an instant by the memory of her face, right after Fujibayashi had died. He shook the image off mentally and smirked at her.

 

She blinked at him and raised an eyebrow. "...So, I hear-"

 

"That I got caught fighting Yamaguchiya, right?" He smirked and crossed his arms.

 

"Um, yes."

 

"Let's see if I remember this right...." He started counting with his fingers. "Kotomi wasn't happy to learn that I wouldn't be there for the next three days, the choir club agreed to join the theater club, and I partially undid your work convincing Furukawa that I'm not a psychopath."

 

Kyou blinked again and took a step back. "...Tomoya, you're kind of scaring me a little."

 

"Well, let em scare you a little more, then." He stood to the side. "Make yourself at home!"

 

"...Maybe I should stand out here?"

 

"Sure, but Kotomi will be here in a minute or so. You did tell her my address, right?"

 

"...Definitely scaring me a little."

 

"Sorry, I was in the future. Bad future. Came back to prevent it future. You know, like in the Terminator movies. Oh hey, I totally wasn't joking about the mind-linked army bit, by the way."

 

She stared at him agape.

 

"So, yeah. Actually, I had to die to come back. And spend a trillion eternities in what amounts to purgatory. This may have knocked a few screws loose, so I apologize if I seem a bit manic."

 

Kyou blinked. Then blinked again. Then she shook her head. "Um, I guess you're doing pretty well for being dead?"

 

Okazaki snorted and laughed. "Hah! Now there's an old one. Haven't heard that since I last played Fallout 2. Didn't think you had, though."

 

She turned her head away while maintaining eye contact. "Um, I haven't."

 

"Oh. Well, coincidences happen!" He smiled widely at her.

 

She stared at him for a few moments before taking a deep breath. "...Tomoya, I think you might need help. Professional help."

 

"What, you mean like a psychologist?"

 

She nodded.

 

"Oh, well, yeah, probably. Doubt they would do much good, though. I just need to get used to life again. I.... No, not going to go repetitive, can't do it, won't do it, am doing it, DAMN IT." He smacked himself across the face.

 

"Tomoya!" Kyou grabbed his wrist.

 

"Ah, right." Okazaki gave her a sheepish smile. "Sorry, I've really not been well. Bad stuff happened. And I don't think I want to get into the specifics. But, it's good to see you again. Really, I mean it."

 

She let go of his wrist with a sigh. "Look, Tomoya, you want my advice?" Without waiting for an answer, she continued. "Talk to Kotomi. You're right, she's probably on her way now. She's smart. I think she will know what to do for you."

 

"And what about you?"

 

She put her hands on her hips with a smirk. "I'm going to go home and pretend this discussion didn't happen. And then, when you get off suspension, we can go back to being abusive friends."

 

"Heh! Well, alright, since you put it like that." He looked up as a figure emerged from behind the neighboring building's facade. "Oh hey, it's.... It's Kotomi."

 

Kyou nodded and gave him half a smile. "Well, have fun, Tomoya. And... good luck." She turned and walked in the opposite direction as Kotomi.

 

Okazaki only tangentially noticed, as he gazed at Kotomi. 'My gods.... Was she always that beautiful? I had... forgotten.'

 

Kotomi came to a stop in front of Okazaki, and blinked as he stood in her way, slightly agape. "...Tomoya kun?"

 

He blinked and averted his gaze, realizing he had been staring. "...Kotomi chan."

 

"...Is something wrong?"

 

"I.... No. Yes. Maybe." He rubbed his eyes wearily. "I have a long story to tell you. Ah, please, come in." He stood to the side so that she could enter.

 

She blinked again, but stepped into his house, shedding her shoes by the door.

 

"Have a seat anywhere, uh, do you want some tea?" He walked past her as she looked around curiously.

 

Kotomi nodded with a smile and sat on the chair he had in front of the television.

 

Okazaki went into the kitchen and filled a tea kettle with water, sat it on the stove, and turned the heat on. Then he went into the living room and moved the sofa in front of the television, facing Kotomi. With a sigh, he laid down on the sofa and rubbed his eyes. She waited patiently for him to say something, and he looked at her out of the corner of his eye after a few moments.

 

"So, I think I already told you that I'm reincarnated," he said, earning him a nod from Kotomi. "Right. And that I was fighting my past self. Uh, so, I kind of am reborn again because in yet another reality I managed to really screw things up big time and everyone died, and..." He sighed and rubbed his eyes again.

 

"...Everyone?" she asked with a tremor in her voice.

 

"...Yeah. That's not going to happen though. Not this time. I thought I couldn't change things before, thought it would cause a paradox.... Gods, I should have just listened to you, but I was so sure...." He ground his teeth. "If nothing else I should have listened to Ushio. She flat out told me I'd screw up bad if I did that..."

 

"...Ushio?" Kotomi tilted her head to the side.

 

"Uh, yeah. Sorry, Ushio is an infuriating witch from another dimension, don't worry about it," he said and waved it off.

 

'A witch, am I?' asked the part of him that was Ushio.

 

'Bitch, actually. Queen of them.'

 

'Hmph.'

 

"Anyway," he continued, "as I said, I screwed up big time. And I spent a trillion eternities in what amounts to hell. I had... a lot of time to think." He turned his head to look at her straight on. "For instance, I thought a lot of about you, Kotomi chan. At times, thinking of you was all that kept me from going completely mad in that place."

 

"...Me?" She blinked, then blushed as she considered the implications of his words.

 

"Yes, you. I.... Stuff happened, would have happened a bit after now. And... look, let me just get down to the gist of it. I know you feel something for me. As it happens, I feel something for you too."

 

At his declaration, Kotomi's face turned bright red.

 

"I had been under a pact to remain alone however, so I never really acted on it. I had said though, that I would consider dropping that pact, after a year's time. Well, that's not exactly it, but.... Look. I...." He blinked. 'Shit. What if we fail against Past? That's still on the table. And now I've done declared that. What if we fail? What would that do to her, after having said that? ...Gods damn it, we've already started.'

 

He sighed. "Kotomi chan. I still have to face off my past self. It's going to be for keeps, one do or die battle in the center of my mind. If I had... been thinking properly, I would have waited to say any of this. There's a chance I will not come back from it."

 

Kotomi blinked, then tears began to shine in the corners of her eyes. "...Don't leave me, Tomoya kun. Please... don't leave me."

 

Okazaki sighed again. "I don't want to. Gods, Kotomi chan, I don't want to. I will do my very best not to. But please.... Know that it is possible. And try not to be upset. You're... a great girl. If it comes down to that, then please, for me... try and find happiness for yourself if it does. And please... pray that I succeed."

 

"...I will," she said with a sniff, before standing up and wrapping her arms around the laying Okazaki. He wrapped his arms around her in turn, as she began to sob into his shirt.

 

"There, there," he cooed, rubbing her back. "There, there..."

 

With a thought, he cut the power to the stove. 'No point in interrupting a good cry, after all.'

 

\----0----

 

Somehow, and Okazaki wasn't entirely sure how, he and Kotomi had ended up both being on the couch, her sleeping and him watching her sleep.

 

'This is unfair for her, you know,' he reflected. 'What if we don't... Gods damn it all. But what am I supposed to do, tell her to go away? ...Of course, didn't do that last life, and then she killed herself. Gah, different circumstances.'

 

He looked down at her. For a moment, the image of her writhing from millions of volts of electricity coursing through her superimposed itself on his vision, and he shuddered.

 

'...Damn it. I had forgotten that for a moment. No. Not this time. That won't happen again. Not this time. Not this time!' He shook his head.

 

His movements caused her to rouse. "...Um? Tomoya kun?"

 

"...It's nothing, Kotomi chan. Just some bad memories. Although, it's getting a bit late..."

 

"...I want to stay."

 

He blinked. "But, um.... Hm. You know, last time we were like this, well it wasn't like this we were just watching Babylon 5, but last time it got this late I said that if you stayed, the rumor mill would run wild."

 

She buried her face in his chest, but made no motion to go. "...What if...," she murmered. "What if you don't come back?" He felt his shirt wetten slightly. "Don't make me leave. Please."

 

He sighed. "...You can stay if you want."

 

She nodded.

 

'Well this is a fine mess, isn't it? Damn it. More than ever, I want to win. I need to win. I can't.... I can't do that to her. Not again.' With that in mind, he let himself drift off into his usual half-sleep.

 

(A surprising amount of this chapter actually made it into the final. Of course, more of it didn’t than did, even so.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 19: Recharted Territory

 

Kotomi stayed there with Okazaki on his couch until morning, when he gently shook her awake.

 

"Kotomi chan, wake up," he said. "It's time to go to school."

 

"...Um? Oh..." She blinked blearily and looked around, confused. "...I'm somewhere strange..."

 

"Not a morning person?" With a thought, he restored power to the stove. Assuming that his home hadn't suddenly been invaded by gremlins, the tea kettle was still on the burner.

 

"...Tomoya kun?"

 

"Kotomi chan?"

 

"...Where am I?"

 

"You stayed at my house. On this couch with me, as a matter of fact."

 

She blinked at this. "...Oh." Her face began to turn red as she considered that, and noted her position in his arms. "Oh, I remember now."

 

"Do you now?" he teased.

 

She nodded, and after a moments thought, snuggled into his chest. "...Tomoya kun is warm."

 

Okazaki blinked, and then shrugged, petting her hair gently. 'Okay, so I could get used to this. Fine, I'll admit it, this is nice. Wrong perhaps, but nice. ...Strange, I feel so calm here. With her in my arms, even a trillion eternities seems worthwhile.'

 

His introspection was interrupted by a tentative knocking on his door. He sighed, even as Kotomi looked up with a blink.

 

"Hold on a minute," he said tiredly, as he suddenly realized how little he relished the thought of getting up to answer the door. 'Most interesting. Vicious bastard who killed all of humanity, twice, then came as close to infinity as anyone else ever has, and I'm effectively tamed by cuddling. How strange.' He turned his face toward Kotomi. "...Much as I find myself hating to get out of present positioning, I need to go answer that."

 

She nodded and, after a moment, released her arms from around his neck. He let her go in return, and found that he missed her warmth immediately. He stood up carefully so as not to disturb her position on the couch more than he had to, and then walked to the door while shaking his head. 'Surely it's not Tomoyo,' he reflected. '...Right?'

 

Tomoyo stood on the other side of his door, in stark defiance of his expectations.

 

Okazaki blinked, and opened the door. "Tomoyo? I have to admit, I didn't expect to see you."

 

"Okazaki, I see you are up," she said with a nod. "And dressed."

 

'Screw one goat,' he thought snidely. "That I am."

 

"...Tomoya kun, who is it?" asked Kotomi from the couch.

 

Tomoyo raised an eyebrow.

 

He turned his head to answer Kotomi. "You remember Tomoyo san?" He blinked. "Well, no, I guess you wouldn't. Ah, give me a few minutes and I'll explain."

 

"Okazaki, what's going on here?" Tomoyo gave him a mild glare. "You aren't taking advantage of some poor girl, are you?"

 

"No," he said, rolling his eyes as he turned to face her. 'Well, not in the way she's thinking, anyway. Though, it sort of feels like it in a way.'

 

He could hear the tea kettle begin to whistle, and watched with his rear vision camera as Kotomi stood and walked toward the kitchen.

 

"Hmm," Tomoyo put a finger to her chin. "After what happened yesterday-"

 

"Yes, yes, I know. I'm feeling better, today." He blinked. 'I... really do feel better, actually. Not back to how I was, but definitely better. Don't tell me all it took was Kotomi.'

 

The tea kettle stopped whistling.

 

'Funny, what a stabilizing influence being around the person you love can have,' noted the part of him that was Ushio.

 

'That's running against the fact that I spent 10^93 years counting.'

 

'Rather impressive in light of that, isn't it?'

 

'It just occurs to me that I'm holding a conversation with myself in my mind. I have no idea why I thought I was doing better.'

 

'Get bent.'

 

'Same to you.'

 

Tomoyo raised an eyebrow at his silence. "...Are you sure you're feeling better?"

 

"Better," Okazaki said. "Not completely well. But better."

 

She frowned at him skeptically. "Humm..."

 

He sighed. "...That said, I really am surprised to see you here."

 

"I said I would make sure you were awake," Tomoyo said. "And that's what I'm doing."

 

"And once you say you're going to do something, you do it. Even in this situation. I must admit, I'm impressed."

 

"That being said, I'm not sure I am needed for this task," Tomoyo admitted, a smile playing on the corners of her lips.

 

He raised an eyebrow at her. "There seems to be an implication there..."

 

"I'm not implying anything at all," Tomoyo said as she put her hands on her hips. "But... I did some thinking about what you said yesterday. And that thing with your hands... I must admit, that shocked me. But it made me think." She put her hands on her hips. "I'm not sure whether or not I believe the whole story, but I must allow for the possibility. And if it is true, then I'm not sure I want to know exactly what happened."

 

She leaned forward and glared at him. "Okazaki. If it is true though... be careful. Don't get everyone killed again."

 

"...I'll do my best," he replied.

 

She smiled brightly. "Good. Goodbye, Okazaki."

 

"See you later, Tomoyo."

 

She turned and walked out onto the sidewalk, and he closed the door. He considered the closed door for a moment, and then shrugged and turned toward the living room.

 

"That was Sakagami Tomoyo," he said. "Nice girl, mostly. I think you'd like her. Oh, also, it is time for school. Are you going?"

 

"...No," Kotomi said from his kitchen. "Do you want some tea?"

 

"Oh, sure." He turned and walked into the kitchen. As he entered, he noted a cup of tea sitting in front of his chair. He sat down gently. "I see you found the tea leaves?"

 

"...I did," she replied as she sat down across from him.

 

He blinked. "...You know, it occurs to me that Tomoyo was on her way to school. Which means you'll be late if you don't go now."

 

She blinked and frowned.

 

"...Further, ah.... How do I say this.... Sleeping on the couch like that has not left your uniform very neat. As in, it's wrinkled. As in, it's going to be obvious you slept in it. As in, the rumor mill really will have a field day. You want to just stay here today?" He smiled at her. "We can watch the Twilight Zone."

 

She tilted her head to the side. "...The Twilight Zone?"

 

"Ah, it's a very old science fiction television show. I think you'd like it," he said with a grin. "It's a bit like golden age science fiction stories, except in visual form. In fact, select stories were used for the scripts for some of the episodes. Very good stuff." He winced. "...Except for the digitally remastered 2017 version. Which is EXTRA HERETICAL." He emphasized his point by lightly thumping his fist on the table.

 

Kotomi tilted her head to the side.

 

"Ah, never mind." Okazaki retracted his fist and took another sip of tea. "So, do you want to watch it with me?"

 

She smiled widely at him. "...I would like that, yes."

 

"So be it!" he declared as he stabbed his index finger into the air. Then with his other hand, he took a small sip of tea.

 

She watched him with raised eye brows. Then, slowly, she raised her own index finger into the air, mimicking him.

 

He let his finger drop. "Ah... You probably shouldn't do what I do," he admitted. "You'll just make people look at you strangely." He stroked his chin. "And possibly might get bullied some, thinking about it..."

 

"...Oh." She let her finger drop, and looked down at her cup of tea with sad eyes.

 

"Hey, don't worry about it, alright?" He reached over the table and patted her hand. "Just do what you want to do, right? And if anyone bullies you, well, I told you before to just tell me about it."

 

She blinked, and then smiled at him.

 

He smiled in return, and then blinked. "Oh! Do you want me to bring you a change of clothes from your house? Now that I have that elevator made, I can do that in a jiffy." He paused. "Hm, actually would be a good way for you to go home, thinking about it. Good way to avoid some of the rumors, I think. Maybe."

 

She nodded. "...Can I go to your bunker?"

 

"But of course," he replied. "You want to go now, or do you want to watch Twilight Zone first?"

 

"...Twilight Zone," she replied.

 

"Twilight Zone it is."

 

\----0----

 

After Okazaki and Kotomi finished their tea, they sat down on his couch and began to watch the Twilight Zone. As he expected, she took to the show well, and her eyes remained glued to the screen.

 

He hadn't decided if the fact that she continued to lean against him while watching television was a good thing or not. On the one hand, he couldn't help but feel calm and happy while in her presence. On the other hand, he worried that he would lose against Past, and what that would do to her.

 

He was sure of one thing, however. And that was that the black dress he had retrieved from her house looked just as good on her as it ever did.

 

As the day rolled on, parts from the projector he had promised to fix for Oogami arrived on his desk. He gently stood up, retrieved the parts, and began assembling them while sitting beside Kotomi. He had almost finished assembling the projector when there came an annoyed pounding on his door.

 

"Ah, here, let me get that," he said, standing gently so as not to jostle Kotomi around.

 

She nodded, fully engrossed in the show.

 

He shook his head and turned toward the door.

 

Kyou glared back at him through the glass.

 

He waved cheekily with a smile, as he approached the door. He opened it with a small flourish.

 

"Tomoya," she said brusquely.

 

"Kyou, can't say I-"

 

"So Kotomi chan never showed up at school." She poked him in the chest.

 

"She wanted to watch the Twilight Zone." He shrugged.

 

"Did she ever actually go home, Tomoya?" She raised a challenging eyebrow.

 

"And if I say no-"

 

Kyou grabbed him by the lapels, and futilly tried to shake him. "What were you thinking?!"

 

"A lot of things. Like-"

 

"I thought you'd just talk to her, maybe work out what problems you were having, but no, you had to go spend the night with her!"

 

"I think you should say that a little louder, I don't think they heard you in America."

 

Kyou glowered at him. "I am about this close to kicking your ass right now, Tomoya. Don't think that I won't."

 

"Why are you so annoyed, anyway?" Okazaki raised an eyebrow at her. "You've been trying to set us up ever since that one day in the theater club."

 

"Because, mister 'didn't think ahead,' what do you think the school will do if they learn you had her here while you were on suspension?"

 

"Oh, that."

 

"Yes, that."

 

"Not much, actually."

 

Kyou crossed her arms and frowned at him. "Just because you fix things-"

 

"It's not because I fix things, although that's related," Okazaki admitted. "No, there are reasons why this will work out. Or it'll cease to matter."

 

She blinked and raised an eyebrow it him. "...And what exactly is that supposed to mean?"

 

"You'll find out," he replied with a sigh. "Two days after my suspension ends."

 

She put her hands on her hips and tapped her foot. "...Is this related to the whole 'I came from the future' thing you were going on about yesterday?"

 

"As a matter of fact, it is."

 

She sighed and shook her head. "...Alright then. I'll let it go for now."

 

"Thank y-"

 

"But if you get the both of you expelled, I won't forgive you."

 

"Got it."

 

"Good." She smirked a bit. "And I expect you to name it after me."

 

Okazaki glared at her. "Go home Kyou."

 

"Is that any way to treat a friend?"

 

He stared blankly at her.

 

"...Fine, sheesh," she said after a few moments. "I'll just go, then." She turned around and began to walk.

 

"Kyou."

 

She stopped, but didn't turn around toward him.

 

"Thank you."

 

"No problem. That's what friends are for, right?" She turned slightly and gave him the thumbs up.

 

He smiled. "Yeah."

 

Kyou nodded, and walked away.

 

Okazaki watched her retreating back for a few moments, before he shook his head and went to rejoin Kotomi at the television.

 

\----0----

 

It was only a little later when Okazaki finished assembling the projector.

 

'Oogami is due to arrive here in a few minutes.... Well, assuming the chaos butterfly hasn't caused him to be delayed or something, hm.' He turned his head toward Kotomi thoughtfully. Kyou's words from earlier came back to him. '...Much as I hate to admit it, it really would be inconvenient for him to catch her here. Hm. Guess I'll hide her, and rush Oogami off. Shouldn't be difficult.'

 

"Kotomi chan." He turned to her. "Can you lay down on the couch and watch quietly for a few minutes?"

 

"...Huh?" She blinked at him.

 

"It'll help avoid complications with the school."

 

"...Alright."

 

He smiled at her. "Thank you." He stood up gently, and guided her to lay on the couch. Then he picked up the projector, and opened the door.

 

As expected, Oogami stood in front of the door, raising his fist up to knock.

 

"Oogami san, here." Okazaki thrusted the projector into Oogami's hands.

 

"Ah, Okazaki," Oogami began.

 

"Sorry if I seem to be in a bit of a rush, I'm expecting an important call. It's about Naoyuki, and.... Yeah."

 

"Ah, right, well, I have what I came here for anyway," Oogami said as he eyed the projector. "Good luck with that, alright?"

 

"Thank you." Okazaki bowed.

 

"No problem." Oogami smirked. "See you in class, alright?"

 

"Sure thing."

 

"Well, later then." Oogami turned and walked back to his car, and Okazaki shut the door behind him. He watched quietly until Oogami drove away, before walking back to the couch.

 

"Kotomi chan."

 

"...Tomoya kun?"

 

"All's well. May I sit down?"

 

She pushed herself back into a sitting position, and he gently sat down beside her. She leaned against him, and they resumed watching the Twilight Zone.

 

\----0----

 

It was well past dark before Okazaki and Kotomi stopped watching the Twilight Zone for the night. Kotomi had, over the course of the day, made three simple but filling meals with what Okazaki had in the house; the last of which they ate before Okazaki took her down to his bunker.

 

He sipped the remaining juice from a bowl of udon noodles before setting the bowl down on the kitchen table in front of him. "Delicious. It's surprising what you can do with instant noodles and spices."

 

She blushed and looked to the side as she set her own bowl down. "...Thank you."

 

"Not a problem," he said with a smile. "So, shall we take a look at the bunker now, then?"

 

She nodded.

 

"Alright, then." He stood, picked their bowls up, and put them in the sink. "I should warn you though, it's very warm down there. It's just so deep and large, there's no adequate way to cool it down properly."

 

"...I still want to see it."

 

"Very well," he said with a smile. "Let's go, then."

 

They walked into his bedroom, where the elevator to his bunker was. Kotomi looked around with interest at his room, before turning her attention to the section of floor that slid away to reveal a metal platform.

 

"Right then," he said, and stepped onto the platform. "Milady?" He held out his hand.

 

She blinked at the extended appendage, before tentatively reached out and taking hold of it.

 

He smiled and guided her onto the platform. They descended like that, hand in hand.

 

\----0----

 

Kotomi's reactions to his bunker were much the same as they had been before, Okazaki reflected. Sure, a few things were slightly different from the first time he had brought her down there. For one, he was returning her to her own house. For another, he had two of his terminator fragments holding metal plates fanning her from the moment she stepped off the elevator.

 

But in many ways it was just the same as the first time. She would go from one of his fragments to another, smile when he waved at her with one of them, and wince whenever a loud noise came from the factory below. And as they started nearing her house, the vastness of the bunker once again began to have an effect on her.

 

"We're almost there," he assured her. "Though there is one last surprise at the end."

 

She turned to look at him with a blink. "...Oh?"

 

He nodded. "Yeah. I don't think you've yet seen me standing beside myself."

 

She tilted her head to the side.

 

He winked at her. "You'll see."

 

They turned past one last column of terminator troops, and came face to face with a mirror of the elevator to Okazaki's house. Standing on the elevator platform was Okazaki.

 

Kotomi blinked at the Okazaki on the elevator, before turning to look at the Okazaki beside her while blinking.

 

The two Okazakis grinned in amusement at her bewilderment.

 

"Who says you can't be in two places at once?" observed the Okazaki on the elevator.

 

"To make this less confusing, this form will be going back to my house," the Okazaki beside her said, as he gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

 

"...But.... How?" Kotomi blinked at the Okazaki that had accompanied her.

 

"You want me to give you an overview of that technology?" asked the Okazaki on the elevator.

 

She blinked, and then nodded.

 

"Well, let's talk about it in more comfortable surroundings then, alright?" suggested the Okazaki beside her as he let go of her hand.

 

The Okazaki on the elevator extended his hand. "Shall we?"

 

As she turned to look at the Okazaki on the elevator, the Okazaki that had accompanied her backed around the corner of the terminator column. When she looked back to where he had been, she blinked in confusion.

 

"Sorry, it seemed like it would be less confusing this way," he admitted.

 

"...Where'd he go?" she asked as she brought her hands up to her face.

 

He waved a hand from around one of the terminators, before peaking his head out at her. "Don't mind the man behind the curtain," he said with a wink before disappearing again.

 

"Shall we, then?" the Okazaki on the elevator asked once again.

 

Kotomi blinked and then nodded, and stepped forward to take his hand.

 

\----0----

 

Kotomi and Okazaki ascended the elevator. She got them both some tea, and they sat in the room with the screen door to her yard, discussing the mind-to-machine interface. As the night wore on however, Okazaki sighed.

 

'Why am I doing this?' he wondered as he took a sip of tea. 'It's no longer about her. It's becoming about me. I'm here spending time with her, becoming all the closer to her, when there's a good chance I may not survive what comes. That's not fair, not to her.' He sighed again.

 

"...Is something wrong?" Kotomi asked.

 

"...A bit," he admitted as he sat his tea on the table and steepled his hands. 'So what do we do? Push her away? That'd just hurt her. Carry on as if nothing's happening? That could hurt her worse. ...Compromise between the two extremes? Hmm. Maybe.' He sighed and closed his eyes. "Kotomi chan. It's getting late."

 

"...Oh?" She glanced over at the grandfather clock. "You're right."

 

"I'm going to go."

 

"...You can stay if you want." She blushed slightly as she spoke.

 

He clenched his teeth. "...I would take you up on that, but... I think it's best, for both of us, if I wait until after I have dealt with my past."

 

"...I see." She frowned and set her hands in her lap.

 

He stood up. "Kotomi chan."

 

She looked up at him. "...Yes?"

 

He walked to stand in front of her, and gently took her hands in his own. "I will do my best, to come back to you. Please... pray for me."

 

She squeezed his hands and nodded.

 

He smiled softly, and kissed the top of her head before pulling back with a frown. "...Goodbye, Kotomi chan."

 

"...Tomoya kun... Goodbye..."

 

He let go of her hands and, without another word, walked to the elevator. He could hear a muted sob behind him, and grit his teeth. Almost, he turned back.

 

 

With a sigh, he stepped into the elevator, and descended.

 

\----0----

 

Tomoyo didn't show up at Okazaki's house the following morning, which came as a mild surprise to Okazaki. After she had shown up the last time, he halfway expected her to keep showing up. With a shrug, he sat and contemplated what he was going to do.

 

His musings were interrupted later in the afternoon by rude knocking on his door. He sighed and stood from his position on the floor, and looked out the door window.

 

Kyou looked back at him with a frown.

 

He mentally shrugged and made his way to the door to open it.

 

"Did you do something to Kotomi chan?" asked Kyou, before he had the chance to speak.

 

"Not in any sense you're thinking of," he replied.

 

She frowned and put her hands on her hips. "...Explain that to me."

 

"I need to deal with my past. It's not going to take long, just a couple more days now really." He sighed. "That sounds more introspective than it is. Sorta. It's... complicated."

 

She pinched the bridge of her nose. "Is this related to that whole 'back from the future' thing?"

 

"...If I say yes?"

 

Kyou rolled her eyes. "Look, I was prepared to let it slide, but you've hurt Kotomi now. And-"

 

"Kyou."

 

"What?"

 

"You know I can prove at least part of what happened. Or at least give convincing evidence that it might be possible."

 

She looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "...Alright, fine. Show me."

 

He held out his hand. "Looks like an ordinary hand, right?"

 

"...What are you-"

 

He swapped out his hand tools.

 

She jumped back, and raised her arms up defensively. "-Eep! Tomoya, what the hell?"

 

He frowned at her. "Do you want me to bring a clone of myself up, or are you satisfied?"

 

Slowly, she lowered her arms. "...Assuming I am, I still want to know what happened between you and Kotomi."

 

"Honestly? I told her that I needed time to myself until I had taken care of my past. Which will be in three days."

 

"Alright, fine. Why?"

 

"...Because my success is not assurred. I may perish in the attempt."

 

She glared at him. "...So you push her away?"

 

He sighed. "Honestly, I don't know what to do in this sort of situation. I can only hope that some distance and clear explanations will help her, in a worst case scenario."

 

Kyou considered him for a few moments before sighing. "I was really going to chew you out for this, but after hearing that I just feel sorry for the both of you."

 

"No." Okazaki shook his head with a sigh. "Feel sorry for Kotomi. Whatever happens to me can only be just."

 

She rolled her eyes. "Jeez, Tomoya. Melodrama much?"

 

"I haven't even begun to ham it up enough for you to say that."

 

She snorted. "Good, let's keep it that way."

 

"Heh. Sure, fine." He sighed. "...Can you keep an eye on her for me? Just in case things do go poorly?"

 

"...Is it really that bad?" she asked quietly.

 

"...That's what I've been saying this whole time, Kyou."

 

"Then Tomoya. Don't lose. I'll kick your ass if you do." She held her fist in his face.

 

He smiled softly. "Yeah."

 

Kyou withdrew the fist and smirked at him. "Good." The smirk fell away with a sigh. "I'm serious, you know."

 

"That I do," Okazaki said.

 

She shook her head and turned to leave, but stopped before taking a step. "You know, you're going to have to explain this whole situation to us, sometime."

 

He let out a pained grunt. "...We tried that, and it didn't go so well."

 

She turned her head toward him with an eyebrow raised. "What do you mean?"

 

"I mean that..." He ran a hand through his hair. "You know, never mind. One day, a long time down the road, maybe I'll tell everyone. But I'm not going to do it anytime soon. Not the whole story, anyway. It's too awful." He grit his teeth and sat down on the doorstep. "Much too awful..."

 

She turned back to look at him with a frown. "...Alright Tomoya, I won't ask. Right now." She pointed an index finger at him. "But don't think you're getting out of telling that story."

 

He snorted. "Yeah. I know. But I'll need you to get used to some ideas, first. Unpleasant ones."

 

"Humm..." She turned back again and started walking. "I can't take this melodrama. I'm leaving."

 

"Heh." Okazaki stood up. "Bye then, Kyou."

 

"Bye bye," Kyou replied.

 

With a final shake of his head, he walked back into his house and closed the door.

 

\----0----

 

Okazaki didn't bother going back to school when his suspension ended. Instead, he spent some time designing a welcoming gift for his past self. He hoped the absurdity of what he had planned would buy him a measure of time to talk to Past, just on the offhand chance that he could talk him out of his course of action.

 

He didn't realistically expect to succeed, but the attempt would be amusing at least; if perhaps only from a personal perspective.

 

As much as he hated to admit it, he was nervous. Even though he welcomed a good fight, the fact that so much was at stake- not just his own life, with which he had only tenuous attachment to- but also Kotomi's happiness, which as much as it flabbergasted him to admit, was tied to his own.

 

And, of course, the future of the world. One last ditch effort to change the world in a peaceful fashion, or watch it go up in nuclear fireballs again.

 

'Right, no pressure,' Okazaki thought as he put some finishing touches on the design and started a nanofactory working. 'Of course, nuclear fireballs are probably less likely than complete braindeath when Ushio unleashes her mind plague.'

 

'...You know about that.'

 

'Actually, I merely suspected. It's what I would do, after all. Thanks for the confirmation that you're both still able to hide things from me, and that you do have that plague on demand. Good to know.'

 

'Clever.'

 

'Thank you.'

 

He waited for the part of him that was Ushio to say something further. But when ten minutes had passed without further comment, he mentally shrugged and opted to spend the rest of the day reading science fiction. It was perhaps the last chance he would get to do so, after all.

 

(Actually, quite a bit of this chapter made it into the final version too, looking at it. Huh.)

 

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

 

**A Note From The Author:**

 

And there you have it, all the crap that just didn’t quite make it into the story proper. Well, not all of it, but definitely the more interesting parts!

 

Anyway, that’s all I have. I’d just like to thank everyone who has read this whole mess, and particularly those who have reviewed it. The feedback means a lot to me, you know? And I’m happy that it’s been largely well received, to boot! So, thank you, one and all.

 

See you, space cowboy.


End file.
